


Behind the Silk Screen

by Eiennobasho



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Action, Alternate Universe - Historical, Angst, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Drama & Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Historical Fantasy, Historical References, Slow Burn, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:14:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 34
Words: 433,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25425982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eiennobasho/pseuds/Eiennobasho
Summary: When a twist of fate brings the common-born priestess Kagome to serve Inuyasha, Divine Emperor of Japan, will she be able to help him claim his place on the throne and bring order to their country? Or will court intrigues and their own burgeoning feelings tear the two and their nation apart? A historical romance set in Japan’s Heian Era.
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha, Higurashi Kagome/Kouga, Miroku/Sango (InuYasha)
Comments: 104
Kudos: 93





	1. Of Looming Dark and Lecherous Monks

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, everyone. Eien-no-basho here, though I'll be going by E-n-B for short. This is my first attempt at an Inuyasha fanfic and as such I request a bit of leniency in judgment. Ultimately, though, I would ask that you don't take it too easy on me -there's no improvement where there's no criticism. What I really want to do here before I get the story rolling is explain a few key things:
> 
> 1) Though I love it to death, Japanese history is not my primary focus in my major. I will make good, if not always accurate, use of Japanese history as I know it to be. In other words, feel free to call me on any inaccuracies you might catch. I want to know when I'm in the wrong.
> 
> 2) This story takes place in the classical Japanese Heian period (roughly 794-1185 A.D.) rather than the Sengoku (Warring States) period (1478-1603 A.D.) where the actual series takes place. This is because I found that the earlier time period suited my purposes better.
> 
> Some of the key characteristics of this period that I will be making use of are (here's your mini-history lesson for the day) a decentralized government with its capital at Heian (now Kyoto) and with many independent villages spread out across the country. These villages had minimal contact with or connection to the central court in Heian. And while the capital itself borrowed Chinese institutions and enjoyed a great amount of wealth, the majority of the small villages were still composed of mud pit houses or flimsy huts.
> 
> So basically being a courtier meant wealth and comfort, and being a peasant meant constant struggle to grow enough food to get by. The disparity between the two groups was obvious and caused deep rooted resentment that would come to a conclusion later in the Kamakura age.
> 
> Another facet of the Heian period was the Tennō, or 'Heavenly Emperor', a concept introduced in the preceding Nara period of a divine Emperor descended directly from the central Shintō kami (god) of the time, Amaterasu the sun goddess. By virtue of this relation, the Emperor was acknowledged as having the divine right to rule and absolute authority.
> 
> That, however, did not prevent the numerous court intrigues amongst the many noble clans that had their hands in the government of the country, resulting in bloody struggles within the court for control of or the position of the Tennō. Most notable among these silently warring clans were the Fujiwara, who maintained a stranglehold on the Heian government for a good number of years as regents and through marriage.
> 
> Another big factor in my story will be the dominant religion of the period- Shintō, or the 'way of the gods'. It is essentially a religion that believes in many kami, most of them in some way connected to nature or some natural phenomena. Anything from a prominent tree (Goshinboku) to an impressive rock might be considered a kami, so there is an inherent appreciation of nature and the spirit 'force', so to speak, of nature. Kagome and Kikyou are both priestesses (miko) of this religion in the series.
> 
> Miroku, however, is a Buddhist monk (houshi), a religion that had made its way over from China by the Heian period, but that was still relatively minor. In my story I shall leave him as a Buddhist monk, despite its relative obscurity in Japan at the time.
> 
> There are some similar tenants between the two religions, so there shouldn't be too much conflict (though it should be noted that I am no expert on either religion, especially lacking in my understanding of Buddhism, so feel free to correct me at any misstep you may catch).
> 
> 3) Finally, while I will be using the Heian time period, I will by no means be sticking to the events that actually occurred during the time. The mere existence of Inuyasha and youkai in the story already distorts the reality of things, so while I may utilize a few key events, most of the happenings will be products of my demented imagination. Please do not take them as fact.
> 
> Also, if the dialogue seems a little stiff at times, that's because it is. Formality and propriety are a big part of Japanese culture and that is what I hope to portray accurately. I'm done yapping now, so if you're not already exhausted from that disgustingly long preface, please feel free to enjoy the story.

* * *

The low intonation of the sacred words murmured softly through the silence of the room, inflection dipping and leaping like the trickle of a stream over smooth stones. Soft light gathered in small, work-calloused hands, poised just above the pitiful form of a prostrate child on a dirt-packed floor. The hands hovered searchingly over the length of the boy's body- head to foot, foot to head-halting just above the center of the boy's stomach.

With gentle pressure the hands pushed down. The boy began to shudder.

The shudders grew quickly into convulsions that wracked his small frame, and a sound like the scream of wind whipping through a narrow valley filled the room. A shadow, writhing and twisting, seeped slowly up from the boy, lingering briefly above him before slipping out through the thatched roof of the small, crude hut.

The boy lay still once more, his face relaxing into untroubled slumber.

Kagome sighed softly, leaning back and placing her hands in her lap as the glow faded from them. She turned to the two pale countenances sitting at the small boy's feet, offering them a reassuring smile.

"He should be fine now. It was just an unsettled spirit making him sick. A little rest and he'll be right back to normal."

There was a rasping exhalation from the woman, the little boy's mother, that Kagome could only assume was relief. The man, the boy's father, solemnly placed both of his palms before him on the floor and bowed until his forehead nearly touched the dirt.

"We thank you deeply, Miko-sama. You are welcome to anything in our possession as payment."

"No, no. It's not necessary. I'm glad I was able to help," Kagome protested, standing and dusting off her tattered red hakama. Slinging her longbow and arrows up over her shoulder, she bowed in return.

"If it's alright, I'll be back to check on him in a few days. I want to make certain that that spirit doesn't come back to bother him while he's still recovering."

"You're welcome anytime, Miko-sama," the wife spoke up, her smile infinitely grateful as only a mother's could be. "But the spirits certainly seem to be unsettled lately. My Taro is the third one you've had to take care of this month. I don't know what this village would do if we didn't have you to protect us."

Kagome's smile faltered for a moment. She readjusted the quiver on her shoulder self-consciously.

"It's very kind of you to say so…" she murmured, eyes downcast. "I should be going now, though. I promised Mama that I would help out in the fields today."

Bobbing a bow to the two, Kagome exited the hut quickly.

Clouds hung low and dark in the sky outside, as they had been wont to do for the past few months. The downpour would start soon, Kagome lamented to herself.

All of the rain they had been receiving had overflowed the banks of the river on which her small village was situated, drowning much of what had been a meager crop to begin with. Winter would be upon them soon and what little grain they had in reserve would be used up quickly. The village would be in no small amount of trouble if something was not done soon.

Kagome sighed. She had been turning the situation over and over in her head for nearly two months now, and she only ever seemed to find new worries to concern herself with. There were only two solutions that she had been able to come up with for all her sleepless nights, each of them implausible at best.

One would be to trade with a neighboring village for a supply of grain to last through the winter. Unfortunately her village had so little surplus of anything that it was unlikely that another village could be persuaded to trade, if that village even happened to have enough to spare.

Another obstacle in that plan would be the recent decimation of numerous villages by a horde of restless youkai. She and Kaede, the village's elder miko, had managed to erect a barrier strong enough to protect their own small village from the attacks, but many other villages with lesser spiritualists or none at all had been destroyed. That was what she had heard from the few merchants that had passed through the village, anyway. So there was no way of knowing how long it might take to even reach the closest village still standing.

The second option would be to make the long journey to the imperial court in Heian and beg for some sort of aid. But in addition to the time it would take just to get there, it would take even longer for the decision to be made as to whether or not aid would be granted. And even if it was, there was no telling what kind of payment would be asked of her village in return.

To top it all off the spirits and youkai had been restless for months, their agitation grating constantly on her spiritual sense. The horde that had swept through destroying villages was merely one extreme manifestation of their growing malcontent.

Kagome sighed again, a small frustrated huff, as one hand came up to press at her temple. Certainly she and Kaede had managed to protect the village, but where was their so-called Tennō when his subjects needed his help? Walled up in his grandiose palace and too busy with courtly affairs to concern himself with them, no doubt.

Or at least that was the way that Jii-chan had explained court life to be after having visited the court once in his youth. Kagome herself had never once encountered a courtier and had never had the time to venture much outside of her village, let alone anywhere near Heian.

The wind kicked up suddenly, sweeping up the slope atop which Kagome stood as the downpour began. The miko's eyes slid closed as she felt the cool drops trickle down her face, silently asking the kami what their reasons could possibly be for allowing this to happen to her village.

There was no response. There was never a response.

The rain continued to pour. All of her ever-growing worries clamored for attention in the darkness behind her eyelids. For a brief, choking moment Kagome could feel her future unfolding before her, long and dark and difficult.

Kagome drew in a deep breath, opening her eyes. One moment at a time. That was how she had to do this. That was how she was going to get them all through this.

Nodding to herself, she set off down the hill to begin checking the barriers.

* * *

After what felt like a small, damp eternity, Kagome finished her checks and began her slogging journey up the largest hill in the village through the raging downpour, on her way to the village's temple. Though "temple" seemed a gross exaggeration as far as the shabby little structure was concerned. It was more of an enlarged hut really, but with stronger thatching on the roof and slightly thicker walls. It was, however, all that her humble village could afford.

Kagome pushed the thick, coarse mat hanging in the doorway aside as she entered, ringing what water she could from her hair and trailing sleeves.

"Kaede-sama, I was just out checking the barriers and…" Kagome trailed off as her eyes adjusted to the dim lighting of the room.

Kaede sat beside the fire pit in the center of the room, a cup of tea clutched between her rough, weathered hands. The good tea cups, Kagome noted absently.

But it was the stranger seated across from Kaede that froze Kagome's familiar greeting on her lips. He turned away from the fire to face her, a friendly smile gracing handsome features and a couple of fine gold rings in his right ear catching the light.

Kagome flushed in embarrassment. She realized simultaneously why Kaede had brought out the good teacups and that she looked like a living landslide, drenched and splattered with muck.

"Kagome, child," Kaede called, her rasping voice firm enough to shake Kagome from her stupor. "This is Shingon Miroku-sama. He is a houshi visiting us from the imperial court."

Prompted by Kaede's words, Kagome lowered herself gracefully down onto her knees in the doorway.

She bowed low, hoping the gesture would somewhat mitigate her bedraggled appearance.

"It is an honor to meet you, Houshi-sama," Kagome said formally, just as Kaede had taught her. "Please excuse my breach of manners and my…less than proper appearance. I was not aware that we would be receiving an esteemed guest today."

"Not at all, Kagome-chan," Miroku returned with a chuckle, surprising Kagome with the familiar address. "After all, any man who fails to appreciate a woman who looks quite so well as you do when wet is no man at all."

Kagome rose up from her bow, her expression twisting incredulously. The houshi continued to smile his blithe smile, as if he had not ever uttered an inappropriate word in his life. Kagome's eyes slid to meet Kaede's single good one in askance, but the old miko merely shook her head in a manner that said clearly she had expected nothing less.

"Come, child, sit," Kaede instructed, motioning for the younger miko to take the place beside her near the fire.

Kagome rose hesitantly and went to her, giving the grinning houshi a wide berth. He was very clean, she noted as she passed, mentally comparing his pale skin to the ever-begrimed skin of herself and the villagers.

His short, dark hair was tidy and pulled back into another fine looking gold ornament at the nape of his neck. His dark osode and deep violet kesa were also of some rich material, obvious even from a distance. All testament to the great wealth of the court, and a poignant reminder of the lack in her own little village.

Kagome realized that she had not quite managed to keep the bitter turn of her thoughts from her face as she sat down, alerted by the slight slip of the houshi's smile and Kaede's gentle grip on her shoulder. Quickly she schooled her face into civility and offered to make another pot of tea.

The houshi replied in the negative with equal civility, if a bit more warmth. In the silence that followed Kagome reminded herself firmly that the man in front of her was not the cause of her frustrations and did not deserve to deal with them.

"What business is it that takes you so far away from the capital, Houshi-sama?" Kagome asked, forcefully shucking off the tension she had caused in the room.

"I wish to investigate the recent spiritual disturbances that have been reported in this area," Miroku responded, though Kagome caught the quick look that passed between the houshi and Kaede. "The recent youkai attacks seem to have stirred things up even further, making my job of finding the source a bit more difficult than I had expected. But rest assured that I am doing everything within my power to prevent such a tragedy from recurring."

"Are you just passing through, then, on your way to one of the wrecked villages, Houshi-sama?" Kagome said. "I think they might require your aid more than us, after all, and they might be able to provide you with more information about them. The youkai were not able to enter our village."

Another furtive glance passed between the man and her mentor.

"Actually, Kagome-chan, I decided to visit this village precisely because it was not destroyed. I was curious as to what saved your village when several of the surrounding villages were completely leveled. Kaede-sama has been informing me that this small miracle can be attributed to you," Miroku explained, his look becoming oddly intent as it came to rest fully upon her.

"No, not at all," Kagome said, slightly discomfited. "I only helped a bit. Kaede-sama was the one who did most of the work. She is just too modest to say so."

"I'm far too old for modesty, child," Kaede interrupted dryly. "If it had been me I would have said so."

"You do have quite an aura, Kagome-chan," Miroku added, the sharpness still in his eyes. "I was able to sense it from quite a distance away, actually."

"Well…" Kagome faltered, at a loss with the gaze of both her mentor and the houshi now fixed on her. The feeling of missing something important hung irritatingly just above her like smoke from the fire.

Long moments passed filled only by the pattering of the rain against the hut and the slight crackle of the fire. Miroku and Kaede sipped their tea quietly, neither of them making any moves that Kagome could see to renew their silent communication. She was stuck with nothing but vague annoyance and a few half-formed suspicions.

At length Kaede set down her mug of tea and stood, the creaking of her old joints nearly audible.

"Well, Houshi-sama, if you will excuse us, I believe Kagome's original purpose in coming here was to request my assistance in reinforcing the village barrier. As I would like to accomplish that task before night falls, we must be going. Right, child?" she said.

"Ah, yes," Kagome said, recalling her initial intent suddenly.

She rose quickly and fetched a cloak hanging on the wall, knowing that Kaede’s old age left her vulnerable in weather the likes of which continued to rage outside. Kaede nodded gratefully, wrapping the rough garment around her shoulders and head.

"Feel free to remain here in the temple for as long as you wish, Miroku-sama. It is, as always, at your disposal," Kaede offered as she and Kagome grabbed their bows and headed towards the door.

Miroku rose to join them, gold topped shakujou jangling in his hand.

"I am afraid I have already imposed on your kind hospitality for far too long, Kaede-sama," he said with a slight bow. "Besides which, I have a few matters to attend to before I must move on. I suppose we will be forced to part ways here for the time being."

Before Kagome could so much as blink he was at her side, bending over to kiss her hand. It was such a foreign gesture that she had to fight down the urge to flinch. Until she felt the quick sweep of something across her posterior. Reflex alone had her open hand connecting hard with his face, mortification chilling her as the fleshy sound echoed in the small room.

"I…I-your hand!…you…" Kagome sputtered, her own hands flapping in odd, distressed gestures that were half placating and half explanatory. By the kami, she had struck a noble!

"Not to worry, Kagome-chan. My hand slipped and you reacted as anyone would," the houshi said smoothly, gingerly touching the redness blooming across his cheek.

Kagome could not help but think that the hand on her butt had felt oddly deliberate for an accident, but managed to bite back that observation. No need to press her luck any further if he was content to leave it be.

"Let us be on our way and let Miroku-sama be on his, child," Kaede spoke up, barely suppressed laughter thickening her voice. She took Kagome's hand to lead her out like a child, but Kagome hesitated as something occurred to her.

"Umm, Miroku-sama," she ventured hesitantly. "I do not quite know how to say this, especially after hitting you like that…"

"Ah, could it be that you have fallen for me?" Miroku interjected with the utmost seriousness. "Alas, fair Kagome-chan, as beautiful as you are, I am currently in no position to take a wife, though I suppose I could at least grant you the pleasure of bearing my-"

"Ah, no, that is not it at all," Kagome interrupted, too surprised by the outlandishness of his words to remember manners. "I was just wondering if you would be returning to the capital before winter."

"Oh!" said Miroku sheepishly, though without quite the degree of embarrassment that Kagome thought fitting of the situation. "Yes, I intend to. Why do you ask?"

It was Kagome's turn to feel sheepish.

"It is just…because of all the rain and the flooding, the village's crops for this season are wrecked, and I have quickly exhausted every option I know of to keep us all from going hungry this winter. I was hoping…that you might plead to the Tennō-sama on our behalf. I am truly sorry and ashamed to request this of you, but I think you might be our best hope."

Kagome bowed low, well aware that she was putting herself at his mercy.

"Now, no need for that Kagome-chan," the houshi said. "I will be more than glad to plead on behalf of your village when I return."

"Truly?" Kagome could have hugged him, her eyes bright with relief as she raised them to look at him.

"Of course," he replied. "And all that I would ask in return is that you, Kagome-chan, would bear for me a healthy-"

"Time to go, child," Kaede cut him off, practically dragging the young woman out of the hut.

"Farewell, Kagome-chan. I am certain we will meet again," Miroku called after them as they disappeared out into the storm.

"Are we certain he's a houshi? And of the _court_?" Kagome asked, casting an incredulous glance backwards.

"One would hope so, child. Otherwise you've just allowed him to grope your hindquarters with only a small slap in return."

"Wonderful…"

* * *

It was not until dusk that Kagome was allowed to return home, waterlogged, exhausted, and thoroughly irritated.

Holes in the eastern-most edge of the barrier had required much more energy than she had anticipated to fix, on top of her already having expended a good amount of power in healing the child that morning. And all the while the rain had continued to pour down on their heads. Kagome could almost feel the crops dying.

To add to her irritation, Kaede had skirted neatly around every question she had asked concerning her strange visitor. While that did much in confirming her suspicions that something beyond what had been revealed was going on, in the end she was left with more questions than ever. Thus she returned home feeling rather defeated, hoping for nothing beyond changing into a dry set of clothes and crawling into her futon.

Her day, however, was nowhere near over.

Emerging from the cozy hut that she shared with her mother, brother, and grandfather was Miroku. Kagome nearly fell over.

Catching sight of her he waved cheerfully, yet again seemingly ignorant of the strangeness of his actions.

"I knew we would be meeting again, Kagome-chan. Certainly it must be fate. Though I am afraid that you are looking a bit worn after your long day."

Kagome's mouth opened and closed several times, but even a polite formality refused to spring readily to her lips. She settled for merely shaking her head, hoping to clear whatever fog had entered it.

"I see you are speechless with joy at our reunion. But come inside and sit down. We have much to discuss."

With a gentle hand on her shoulder he led her inside. Only vaguely did Kagome realize how silly it was to be led into her own home by a stranger, occupied as she was with keeping track of how low on her back his hand dared to dip.

Her mother sat inside the hut, clutching a piece of needle work in white-knuckled hands. She jerked up as they entered, as if suddenly throwing off a heavy weight. With a smile almost too wide she rose to greet them.

"Kagome, I'm so glad you're finally back. I was getting worried about you being out in this weather all day long," she fretted, wrapping her daughter in a tight embrace despite how soaked the miko was.

The embrace was oddly lingering for just a welcome-home hug, and Kagome could have sworn she felt her mother shaking faintly.

"Where are Souta and Jii-chan?" she asked, managing to put her mother at arm's length to take a look at her.

Her mother turned away quickly and went to busy herself with digging around in a small, rough trunk for a blanket. At a loss, Kagome looked to the houshi at her side. His smile was as friendly and unhelpful as ever.

Kagome's mother discovered a blanket with a tiny exclamation and quickly returned to wrap it firmly about Kagome's shoulders, leading her and Miroku to the fire pit in the center of the room. She forced them both to sit down and bustled about making a warm pot of tea in a manner so informal that Kagome had no doubt her mother and the houshi had been talking for some time before she arrived.

"May I ask what you are doing in my home, Houshi-sama?" she ventured hesitantly.

"This is the other business that I had to attend to. Though I believe your lovely and honorable mother would like to be the one to explain things fully to you," he replied.

Apprehension prickled lightly down the length of Kagome's spine. She turned to her mother.

"Mama? What's going on?" she called, halting her mother in her tracks. "Where are Souta and Jii-chan? Why have you been talking with Houshi-sama?"

Slowly the older woman set down all the trinkets she had been busying herself with. She came to sit across from the two, eyes fixed on the hands folded tightly in her lap.

The smile was gone. It had been painfully forced, Kagome realized.

Abruptly she noticed how tired her mother looked, the lines around her eyes and mouth deep. The older woman made a few helpless, pointless gestures with her hands before she was able to look her daughter in the eye.

"Kagome, dear…" she searched for words, and Kagome found herself holding her breath. "You know…you know too well what the situation here in the village is. As things stand we won't last through the winter. And even if we do, we'll still be dependent on you to keep the youkai from attacking."

"I know you're strong, dear…I _know_. But if things continue like this…all I can see is something that is long and difficult and painful for you. I don't want that. And I'm sure some part of you has realized it, too, and that you don't want it either, even if you're scared to say so."

"Mama," Kagome said, wanting her to stop.

She knew well enough what her future in the village would be, saddled with the weight of protecting it and yet never really belonging to it for the rest of her life. There was only one path for her to walk, and the bleakness and inevitability of it had nearly overcome her in her weaker moments.

But she had long since learned to accept it as the fate given to her. Better that she bear it with all the grace and cheer she could muster, as giving voice to her fears would only serve to trouble the villagers who depended upon her.

She refused to add another burden to the load of those who already had more than their fair share to deal with. They were strong, and it would be a grave failure on her part not to be strong, as well. That her mother had been able to see the fear in her…could the others see it, too? Was she failing them when they needed her most?

"I sent Souta and Jii-chan out to see what they could do in the way of covering the crops when Miroku-sama came requesting to speak with me," Kagome's mother plowed on relentlessly, though her voice trembled like it was all she could do not to cry.

"They both want what's best for you as well, but I didn't think that they would be able to handle this in quite the manner necessary. You've gotten beyond this village, Kagome. It's as simple as that."

"The way that Kaede-sama educated you, your immense spiritual gifts, even just by your own nature you're set apart. You've gone so far beyond all of us that the villagers can't help but clutch at you, relying on you even as they hold you as something apart from themselves. And you can't help but struggle to please them all, because that's who you are. But you'll never be happy here-it's not possible. It won't be enough for you. I'm scared that life here will crush you, will drain all the brightness I see in you."

"Mama, _stop_ ," Kagome pleaded, desperately frightened to hear the words she scarcely ever allowed herself even to think spoken aloud. "I was raised _here_ , I'm just the same as everyone…as you…I'm a part of this village…"

"Hush now, Kagome," he mother broke in with gentle firmness, her expression slowly beginning to crumble. "You know better than that. _I_ know better than that. You're my baby, and to watch you struggle every day…to watch you grow into someone so bright and strong…when Shingon-sama made his offer there was no choice but for me to accept."

"I know you'll be angry, but…please try to understand that I only want what's right for you," she entreated.

"I do believe that your honorable mother has only your best interests at heart. A lesser woman would not be able to do what she has done," the houshi added solemnly. Kagome jumped a little, having forgotten for a moment that he was still in the room with them.

"What has she done?" Kagome asked through lips gone numb, heart sinking like a stone through her chest to rest down in the pit of her stomach.

"Shingon-sama…has requested that you accompany him on his journey back to Heian. In a few days time, after you've packed and said your good-byes to the villagers, you'll be going with him…to live in the court as a spiritualist."

The tears that her mother had been so valiantly holding back escaped now in small, hiccupping sobs. She pressed a hand to her mouth as if to muffle the sound, her eyes meeting Kagome's in askance.

The cold and exhaustion of the day seemed to seep down into Kagome's bones. She could only stare at her sobbing mother, the woman who had just given her away.

Darkness welled up, veiling her eyes. She fainted.

* * *


	2. Of Farewells and Fights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kagome says her farewells to her village and family, setting out on her journey with Miroku.

Kagome had a distinct feeling that she did not want to wake up. Although her mind struggled to grasp exactly what it was, she knew there was definitely some unpleasantness to face in the waking world were she to return to it. So she hovered indecisively on the border of consciousness, hoping to fall back into the darker depths of sleep.

There was noise, though, somewhere near her head. Some sort of raspy, snuffling noise invading the calm of her mind. It was her mother, Kagome thought with sudden insight. She was crying. Just as she had been crying before Kagome…

She suddenly recalled why she had wanted to remain asleep. Too late, though. Her mind had already begun to regain focus. With an inward grimace the she opened her eyes, resigned though not ready to deal with the oddity that was currently her reality.

Her mother's face came into focus first, directly above her. It was red and puffy, tears still dribbling forlornly from her dark brown eyes. They left small tracks of clean, tanned skin amidst the customary thin coat of dirt they all wore like a second skin in the village.

The older woman made a strangled sound when she realized her daughter was awake, her sudden motion joggling Kagome's head where it rested in her mother's lap. Her mother bent double to hug Kagome's torso tightly, mumbling nonsensical words.

"You're smothering me, Mama," Kagome protested, upset by her mother's distress.

"It's for your own good, Kagome, I swear it is," was the watery response as her mother finally regained the ability to form words.

"Smothering me is for my own good?" Kagome joked weakly, though no part of her felt like joking.

Her mother hiccuped feebly, the sound choked as she reluctantly released her daughter. "No, not that. I mean…" she trailed off, shaking her head.

Kagome, free of the stranglehold, sat up.

"Are you certain you are feeling well enough to get up, Kagome-chan?"

The question came from somewhere down by her feet. The houshi was sitting there, joined now by her brother and grandfather.

"I feel fine," Kagome replied, an edge to her tone that she could not blunt.

He was, after all, the cause of this mess.

"Are you sure you're alright, Nee-chan?" Souta piped up. "It's not like you to go and have a fainting spell."

His unsuspecting tone told Kagome that he still had no idea of what had come to pass between their mother and the houshi.

"I'm alright, really. Being out in the rain and working all day must have taken more out of me than I thought," she offered, loathe to be the one to inform him of the circumstances.

Judging by the utter silence in the room, the rain had finally stopped. After considering the situation for a moment, Kagome rose carefully.

"Might I ask you to accompany me outside, Houshi-sama?"

"Kagome," her mother said, a warning edge to her tone. Her apprehensive expression said that she anticipated violence if Kagome were allowed to be alone with the man.

"I just need to speak with him, Mama."

"Then I'll go with-"

"I need to speak with him alone, Mama," Kagome interrupted her gently.

"Then let us go outside and be alone, Kagome-chan," Miroku said, rising to join her.

"Just yell if he tries anything, Kagome," Jii-chan spoke up, giving Miroku a suspicious glance.

Her grandfather had always had an instinctive wariness of outsiders, but Kagome thought him quite justified in this instance. She surreptitiously sped up her steps, keeping just out of the range of the nobleman's hands.

"Sir, I am a houshi- a man of the cloth," Miroku protested, his expression one of exaggerated innocence.

"Yeah, yeah," Jii-chan muttered disrespectfully. Kagome turned her head to conceal a small grin.

When they had exited the hut and were far enough to be out of hearing range, Kagome spun to face the man gravely.

"I'd like an explanation of what's going on. A very thorough explanation," she demanded with only trace amounts of her former politeness.

"As long as you promise not to faint again, Kagome-chan, I will be more than happy to give you an explanation," Miroku ribbed lightly.

"Don't blindside me with any more life altering information, and I promise I won't faint again," Kagome returned, irritated at the reminder.

Miroku nodded and raised his hands in a gesture of peace. "Where would you like me to begin?"

Kagome took a moment to organize her thoughts. "How about the real reason you came to this village?"

"I truly was sent from the capital to investigate the spiritual disturbances," Miroku said. "There have been unusual occurrences all across the land, but the most prominent happenings have been here on the southern edges.”

“And though I have been unable to locate the exact source, the majority of the jyaki I have sensed has been in this general area. But there is more to it than mere investigation."

"So you lied earlier?" Kagome interjected, her expression growing stonier by the moment.

"Not lying, Kagome-chan, merely excluding a few details here and there. There is a world of distance between the two," Miroku replied with the air of something profound. Kagome scoffed in a most unladylike manner.

"But to return to my point," the houshi pressed on, the corner of his mouth tipping wryly upward. "Several reports were made by merchants and visitors to the capital about a village that had been left miraculously unscathed after the youkai rampage."

"My village?"

"Your village, indeed, as well as your miracle. I initially expected that the safety of the village could be attributed to the inhabitance of youkai nest or something equally unpleasant in it. I was quite surprised and pleased to find such a treasure as yourself in such an unlikely place."

"Listen," huffed Kagome with what fraying patience she had left, shaking her head. "Perhaps you weren't listening earlier or you thought I was just being modest, but I was serious when I said that Kaede-sama was responsible for most of it. I barely did anything."

"I was listening, but rather than modesty I believe it to be misconception on your part. Though Kaede-sama may have acted as a channel through which to funnel them, it is your powers that created the barrier that saved your village.”

“Even a spiritualist of the lowest order would be able to sense that. You have a very distinct aura, Kagome-chan, and though you may respect her deeply, Kaede-sama's pales in comparison."

There were no traces of joviality in his face or tone, not so much as an easy half-smile resting on his lips. Kagome faltered, her certainty and ire failing for a moment.

"There's no way that I…it's just…not-"

"I assure you, Kagome-chan, that I have never before encountered a spiritualist of your caliber," the houshi asserted with firm relentlessness, pressing the idea forcefully into her head. "Though your training is lacking, I believe you have the power to rival the kami themselves if handled properly."

"I thought we weren't dropping any more of that life altering information," Kagome muttered, pressing a hand to her brow as if it might help to sort out the flurry of her thoughts.

"That's the reason you want me to come to the capital?" she managed after a moment.

"I was instructed to find out the situation of this village and act accordingly. I find it very according that you should come back with me."

"But _why_? I mean, even if by some chance I do turn out to be as great as you think I could be, aren't there hundreds of other great spiritualists at the capital's disposal?" Kagome pleaded. She found herself wanting to lie back down, despite her resolution to have everything out in the open.

"Sadly, these past few years have seen a great decline in the number of those entering the orders, as well as the deaths of many of the greats already within them. Certainly there is no one with quite your raw potential there.”

“And in times such as we find ourselves, with spirits all across the country suddenly up in arms, your power, I am sure, would prove to be invaluable," Miroku explained with an air of slight apology.

It was impossible not to take pity on the pale young woman, with her small world suddenly being torn open at the frayed seams.

Kagome turned away from him, scrubbing roughly at her forehead with the calloused palm of her hand. She took a deep, measured breath, exhaled, took another, exhaled, and her mind slowly calmed, her agitation fading to a mild buzz in the back of her head.

It was a technique Kaede had taught her when she was young and her father had passed away. For weeks she had been so distressed that she had had trouble concentrating and, subsequently, trouble using her powers to help others who had fallen victim to the same plague that had killed her father. The technique had helped to stabilize her and to save those others that could be saved.

She grouped her thoughts carefully. Her mother had essentially promised her to the houshi and the court. She had done it for Kagome's own good, that much the young miko could understand.

And truly Kagome should have felt grateful, ecstatic even. To be taken so easily out of an existence of struggle into a secure life, to learn that far from being just another mundane spiritualist she possessed such an immense gift from the kami, to be put in a position to help hundreds with her powers rather than just the small circle of her village- all of it should have been like some wild fantasy reserved solely for her dreams.

But it was not good at all. In fact, all Kagome could feel was ill, wishing the houshi and all his grand plans for her as far away from her village as possible. She could not simply abandon her village, her responsibilities. She could not so easily let go of the burden she had been fated to bear, not after carrying it so diligently for so many years.

"I don't think they'll last long here without me, Miroku-sama," Kagome voiced at length. "I know it sounds conceited of me to say that, but they depend on me for a lot and…"

"Your honorable mother has already taken the trouble of explaining exactly how much this village depends on you. Frankly, I am surprised that you are not more eager to escape such a burdensome existence," Miroku said sympathetically.

Kagome shrugged, shaking her head. "They're my people to protect, and you see why I can't just abandon them."

"On the contrary, I see all the more reason for you to leave," Miroku said. Kagome frowned, waiting for him to elaborate.

"Another thing that your mother and I covered in our discussion was the problem of the void that would be left by your absence. As a solution, I put forth the protection of the capital in return for taking you. They will receive imperial guards, access to the imperial food supply, and any spiritualists or healers that they might have need of. In short, they should be comfortably set for the rest of their lives."

"You could really do all that?" Kagome asked incredulously.

"It would only be fair to give them at least that much in return for taking something so precious. And it would be my personal pleasure to give you a chance at a life that you might have some say in," Miroku said, the warm smile returning to his face.

"Ah…" was all Kagome could manage.

There was something wet on her face, and for a moment she wondered if it was starting to rain again. But the skies were clear.

Kagome realized she was crying. She had never felt so relieved in her entire life.

She slipped slowly down onto her knees in the muck, all of her muscles relaxing at once. Burying her face in her hands, she cried softly.

She had been struggling to do her duty by the villagers as far back as she could recall, just barely managing to keep them one step ahead of disaster at every turn. The future, however, had always been a bleak prospect, with no change in sight and little hope for improvement. But now, with this...

She sobbed, pressing clenched hands to her eyes. They were saved. She was saved. At last, the struggle seemed to be over.

"There, there," Miroku cooed soothingly, kneeling down and patting her gently on the head like a small child. "Everything will be fine now."

For the first time in a long time, Kagome was actually able to believe it.

* * *

After crying until it felt as if there were no tears left in her in front of the houshi, Kagome had been left feeling acutely embarrassed. Luckily he had seemed to understand and, after giving her a quick pat on the backside to "return her fully to her old spirit", had informed her that he would be going to prepare for their departure. He said that he would be returning to fetch her in one day's time and suggested that she should pack and say her farewells in the meantime.

Kagome had seen him off with a sheepish smile and a wave, making a mental note to ask Kaede for a staff or club of some sort as she would probably be traveling alone with the houshi all the way to the capital.

Now the young miko took a moment to close her eyes and center herself before entering the hut. Her mother might already know, but she still had to inform Jii-chan and Souta of everything that had come to pass.

She pushed aside the coarse door hanging and stepped inside. And ran straight into her mother, brother, and grandfather. She tumbled back onto the ground with a small 'oomph'.

The three were slow to move forward to help her up, all of them looking rather abashed.

"Doing a bit of eavesdropping, huh? And here you always told me that was rude, Mama," Kagome griped lightly, standing without their assistance. "How much did you hear?"

"No, Kagome, we weren't-"

"Foolish granddaughter, how could you think your grandfather would-"

"We weren't able to hear anything, Nee-chan. You went too far away from the hut," Souta put in bluntly. The other two shot him sharp looks.

"Well, alright, then," said Kagome, slightly disappointed. It would have been easier if they had simply overheard. "Why don't you all sit down and I'll explain everything."

They complied. Kagome explained.

At the end her mother was crying again, but Kagome could tell most of it was happiness. It was what she had wanted to begin with. Souta and Jii-chan were both silent for a long, strained amount of time.

At length Souta stood and brushed roughly past her out of the hut. Kagome rose instinctively to go after him but hesitated, unsure if chasing after him would be wise. She looked back towards her grandfather, awaiting his reaction.

He stared hard at her for a long moment before sighing, his old face sagging deeply. "Go after your brother. This old man, for one, understands your reasoning. And who knows, maybe you'll be able to kick that Tennō into action when you get to court."

Kagome flashed him a brief, grateful smile and rushed out. Souta was out of sight already, but she knew well enough where he would be headed. She made her way towards the river.

As she had predicted, he was there. He stood ankle deep on the muddy bank, pitching rocks into the current.

"Souta?" Kagome called tentatively.

"I don't want to talk to you," was the terse reply. He pitched a stone hard and it skipped three times before sinking.

"Then I won't talk. I'll just sit right here," Kagome said, flopping down on the muddy bank.

It hardly mattered at this point, she was such a mess. Absently she ran her fingers through her dark hair to tidy it a little, waiting.

"It's even more annoying if you just sit there and stare at me, Nee-chan," Souta snapped, a little sooner than she had expected. Kagome could not help but smile, bowing her head to hide it.

"Then what would you like me to do?" Kagome asked.

"I'd like you to just go away. That's what you're planning anyway, right?" Souta sniped, uncharacteristic scorn in his voice.

"That I can't do for you. Anything else?"

"You could explain to me exactly when you got so high and mighty that you thought you needed to move to the imperial court!" Souta barked, spinning to face her with eyes bright with feeling. "You could explain when you got so far above all the rest of us!"

"Souta…"

"Are we all some big burden to you? Do you really want to leave so badly? Have you always just been waiting for a chance to get out of here?" Souta accused, anger stealing away his good sense.

There was a rock in his hand and for a wild moment Kagome thought he might toss it at her. But he merely chucked it out into the river where it made a small splash and was carried away with the flow.

"Is that what you really think of me, Souta?" Kagome asked quietly.

He looked frustrated for a moment at her lack of real response. It was obvious that he was trying to provoke her. He was angry and wanted to fight it out. But then his fierce expression collapsed and he threw himself down beside her in the mud, pounding the ground with a fist.

"Of course that's not what I think of you. But why…why do you have to go? I don't care about all that stuff they'll give us for you. I don't care about any of that. You shouldn't have to sell yourself to save us! You shouldn't have to go…" Souta trailed off, unable to look at her.

"I'm not selling myself, Souta. I swear. The village needs the things they're going to give us, but I wouldn't go if I didn't really want to," Kagome said.

Souta shot her an accusatory look, opening his mouth to start in again.

"It's not that I want to be away from you or the village or anything," Kagome cut him off firmly. "Despite everything, I want to stay here. I love you and Mama and Jii-chan more than anything in the whole world, you know.”

“But I'm being given an opportunity that I know will never come again. I can go to the capital and learn and work at changing things for the better for all of you. I'll be put in a position to help so many people, Souta.”

“That's what Papa always said was most important, right? And that's what Kaede-sama always taught me. But I'll tell you what. If you tell me you really want me not to go, I won't go. Because I love you more than anything."

Kagome smiled at him, meaning every word of it though she was already certain of his answer. He was his father's son, after all.

"You're so embarrassing, Nee-chan, always spouting girly stuff like that," Souta whined, flushing faintly. He mumbled something else that she could not catch over the soft babble of the river.

"What was that?"

"I said, I want you to stay," Souta reiterated, turning to face her now.

"Souta," Kagome said, surprised.

Her brother smiled wryly, shaking his head.

"Just joking, Nee-chan…sorta. Maybe I just needed to get it out of my system." He chuckled humorlessly.

"I know things…haven't been easy for you, despite the way you act. There's always something scared in your eyes, and something sad.”

“I just…it's hard to just let you go like that. I can't help but think, 'what will I do now'? It's pathetic, and selfish…"

Kagome gingerly put her arm around his shoulders, aware that he was in the midst of one of those awkward in-between stages of growing up that did not much appreciate affectionate gestures. He allowed her to hug him without a struggle this once.

"I know exactly what you'll do when I'm gone."

"What?"

"You'll go on being the man of the family, just as you have been for a long time now," Kagome asserted confidently.

Souta snorted.

"If I'm the man of the family, then what's Jii-chan?"

Kagome tapped her chin thoughtfully.

"Hmm…the entertainment?" she offered. They both laughed a little at the idea.

"Seriously, though, you're more the man than I am, Nee-chan," Souta argued.

"Thanks, that makes me feel special," Kagome quipped. "But really, I've been too busy running around the village all the time to care for our family. You're the one who makes sure Mama and Jii-chan eat well and take care of themselves.”

“You light the fire pit at night when it's cold. You go out and bring down most of the game and fish for the meat. You manage the family crop plot. So whatever you might think, you are most certainly the man of the family."

"You really think so?" Souta asked.

Kagome nodded.

"Maybe you're right."

They lapsed into silence, watching the sun sink in a blaze of red and orange. It reflected dazzlingly off of the water.

"You'll come back and visit, right?" Souta asked.

"Every chance I get," Kagome replied firmly.

"I'll…miss you, Nee-chan," Souta admitted quietly. He looked painfully embarrassed.

"Awwww, I'll miss you, too," Kagome cooed teasingly, pulling him to her and kissing wetly him on both cheeks. He struggled now, laughing a little and trying to pull away.

"Gross, Nee-chan! Sto-…Stop it! You're so embarrassing!"

The two had made their peace. Even so, Kagome felt a bit like crying.

* * *

The rest of the night passed without event. The two returned to the hut and Kagome's family helped her to begin packing before they all retired for the night, exhausted in every sense of the word.

They slept with their futons closely huddled together for the first time since Kagome's father had passed away. It seemed appropriate, and Kagome savored the feeling of their warmth surrounding her.

In the morning they rose late, a luxury that was unusual for them. They finished packing with much fuss from Kagome's mother, who insisted that she pack the family's finest kimono for the miko's arrival in the capital. Jii-chan, of course, insisted that Kagome pack every hokey protection amulet that the family owned, including a rather questionable looking dried bird's foot.

Kagome had protested that she was nearly carrying the whole hut away with her, but had quietly savored all of the familial fussing and concern.

Eventually, after they had frittered away as much time as possible with packing, the time came for Kagome to make her rounds. She did not relish the idea, though she was very fond of many of the villagers. Nonetheless she made her way out and slowly worked through the huts, saying her good-byes and placing her last blessings on the inhabitants.

Reactions were mixed, from tearful well-wishers to those that threw themselves at her feet and begged her not to go. A few, Kagome could tell with a sinking heart, were resentful, either seeing her departure as a betrayal or angry at her chance at something that might as well have been oceans away from them. It could not be helped, though, and she bore it with all the grace that she could muster.

At last Kagome reached the village's largest hill and the temple atop it, her final stop for the day. Her family fell away from her at that point, understanding that she wanted to say her farewell to her long-time mentor alone.

With a deep, heavy feeling of finality, Kagome climbed the hill and entered the temple for the last time.

Kaede-sama sat facing the door, looking as if she had been expecting her student at any moment. Though that would not have surprised Kagome much, considering how fast news spread in such a tiny village as hers. She bowed to the elder miko, a formality the two rarely observed.

"My dear child, sit down," Kaede ordered gently.

Kagome complied, coming to sit across from her.

"I-"

"I already understand the situation, child, and I'm certain your poor lips have had enough of explanations to last several lifetimes, so why don't we just skip to the important things," Kaede preempted her, holding up a gnarled hand.

"This is what you were speaking to Miroku-sama about yesterday, isn't it?" Kagome asked, events suddenly connecting in her mind.

"Yes, it was. Miroku-sama came seeking answers as to this village and I provided them. He then inquired into your particular situation in the village and as to whether or not I thought it wise that you accompany him. I told him that I did think it prudent, though I believe he would have tried for you either way. He is quite stubborn in that way," Kaede said with an indulgent half-smile.

Kagome frowned, something odd catching her attention.

"You speak of Miroku-sama in a very familiar manner," she stated, a question lacing her words.

"We had met and become slightly acquainted before our unexpected reunion yesterday," Kaede answered the implied question.

"But the houshi has never been to this village before that I can remember…Wait, you don't mean…" Kagome trailed off, disbelieving.

"As hard as it may be for you believe, child, I did once reside in the capital as a spiritualist. For reasons I would prefer not to disclose, I chose to leave that life for a simpler one.”

“Actually, though it may rile you a bit to learn it, I chose this village to live in because of you. I had never seen such a brilliant aura before," Kaede explained, her voice soft with the air of remembering something awe-inspiring.

"Because of me?" Kagome echoed dumbly.

It all made sense, oddly enough. Though she had not thought much on it at the time, Kaede had come into the village when Kagome was already seven years old.

How else would Kaede have learned how to read and write, as she had taught Kagome to do? Not to mention all of the etiquette lessons that the elder miko had given to the younger. Still, it was difficult to comprehend.

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about why you left?" Kagome pressed, deeply curious.

"I'm quite certain," Kaede replied, unyielding.

"Alright, then," Kagome surrendered, a bit disappointed. "Well, then, how do you think I'll fare in the capital?"

"I won't lie to appease you worries, child," Kaede warned.

Kagome nodded eagerly.

"Well, then, I suppose it will be a struggle for you. Though I have taught you as much as I am able, your manners are nowhere near those of a courtier born and bred. Nor do I think you cunning enough to deal well with all of the deceptions that are commonplace in the world of the court.”

“You also have the fact that you were neither born nor raised among them to contend with, and they have never thought well of outsiders. Add to all of that the strenuous spiritual training you will undoubtedly have to undergo. Other than that, however, I believe you might have quite a wonderful time."

"Well, you said you wouldn't be easing my worries," Kagome mumbled, though she was really only vaguely troubled. It all still felt very far away. "I suppose I can only try my best."

"There's the child I love," Kaede said fondly. "Don't let them pervert that spirit of yours, no matter what. Stand as an example, even if you have to stand all alone."

Kagome smiled, warmed by Kaede's affection.

"Thank you, Kaede-sama, for all that you have done for me." 

She bowed low, hoping that even in its simplicity the gesture was enough to express her deep gratitude.

"Good-bye, child."

"Take care, Kaede-sama."

An understanding ran deep between them. Words were inadequate and unnecessary. Kagome smiled. Kaede smiled back. The young miko left.

* * *

Kagome returned to her hut to eat her last meal with her family and wait out the time until the houshi came to retrieve her, knowing that it would only be a matter of time. The majority of the meal was whiled away with small talk, as no one was willing to acknowledge the inevitable.

The knock came at last, a gentle rapping on one of the walls. The houshi obviously wanted to give her a bit of privacy in which to say her final farewells. Kagome was grateful for the small gesture. With a deep breath filling her lungs, she put down her bowl and stood to look over her family.

"This is it," she said, though it was rather unnecessary.

"Now, don't exaggerate, dear. This isn't any 'it', just another little happening in life. You'll be back when you can, very soon I'm sure," her mother chided her shakily, standing as well.

She embraced her daughter in a hold fit to strangle a bear, and Kagome returned the hug with equal force. She breathed deeply, imprinting firmly in her mind the smell of mud and rain and the river.

"You're right, Mama. I'm sure I'll be back in no time at all," Kagome said, though she knew neither of them believed it.

Her brother stood next and gave her a swift, masculine sort of one armed hug.

"Don't worry about anything here. I'll take care of it all," Souta declared with a certainty meant to send her off at ease. Kagome bent down and kissed the crown of his head, despite his protests.

She walked over to her grandfather who had remained seated and kissed him on the temple. He patted one of her hands, smiling a gap-toothed smile up at her.

"Don't let them change you, dear girl. Whatever they say, you'll never be better off than you are now."

Kagome nodded and went to pick up her heavy sack of things, fine kimono, faulty protection charms, and all. She slung it over her shoulder, buckling a little under its weight before straightening back up.

Viciously she bit her lower lip, swallowing back the tears that threatened to overflow. She flashed her family one last smile, though it wobbled a bit at the corners.

"I will definitely be back, so keep a futon laid out for me, alright?" she said.

They all nodded, and Kagome could only assume that their silence meant they were struggling as hard as she was to part without tears. With hurried steps Kagome exited the hut.

Her throat was too tight for her to say anything to the houshi, but he seemed to understand this. Without a word he took her sack and went about hitching it to the back of his large, dark horse alongside his things.

Kagome shifted agitatedly from foot to foot while watching him, glancing back every now and again to see if any of her family happened to be peeking out to watch her go. She did not see any of them and was slightly thankful. She was not sure that she could actually go through with this were she to see them now.

A short eternity later and Miroku was finished, turning back to help her mount the horse. His hands remained respectful as he lifted her into the saddle and as he climbed up in front of her.

He instructed her to hold on and she complied, burying her face and hands in the back of his robes. He did not question her actions, merely saying, "We're off," before kneeing the horse into a mild trot.

Kagome cried quietly into the back of his robes as the sun set and they moved further from the village, never once looking back.

* * *

Kagome awoke the following morning as the first rays of dawn colored the sky, bleary-eyed and disoriented. She was wrapped in the futon she had packed and could only assume that she had cried herself to sleep at some point during the night.

Sitting up, she realized that her village was nowhere in sight and felt her heart clench sharply. A profound, hollowing wave of loneliness swept through her and she was tempted to lie back down to sleep for a while.

"Feeling better, Kagome-chan?" Miroku's voice came from a few lengths away, breaking through her dark thoughts.

He was sitting beside a small fire, roasting a couple of fish over it for their breakfast. The horse was tied to a nearby tree, grazing among the forest foliage.

"Yes, much better, thank you," Kagome fibbed, forcing a smile. "I apologize for falling asleep on you like that, Miroku-sama."

"No problem at all, Kagome-chan," the houshi said, waving her off cheerfully. "I quite enjoyed putting you in your futon last night. I considered crawling in with you to keep you warm, but I was afraid it might be a bit small for the both of us."

Kagome chuckled disbelievingly, one fist flexing threateningly beneath the covers as she wondered how much of that statement was in earnest. She vowed silently never again to fall asleep before him. 

"Would you like some breakfast?" Miroku offered, pulling from over the fire one of the sticks on which had been roasting a fish. He held it out to her.

Kagome crawled out of her futon and accepted the fish with a small, "Thanks." She blew lightly on it before taking a bite.

"You are certain that you are feeling better, Kagome-chan?" Miroku inquired, nibbling at his own fish.

Kagome looked up, but the houshi had his eyes fixed on his food. She grinned wryly. A lecher he might be, but Miroku really did seem to be a good man. Quite perceptive, at that.

"I'm sure I'll be fine," Kagome replied, already feeling a little less alone. "Even if I wasn't always happy there, it's still a big change to just pack up and leave. And I'm a little worried about what it will be like in the capital, as well as how the villagers will fare now that I'm gone, even with the help you send. It's a big change for them, as well."

"I believe that things will actually become more peaceful now that you are gone, if you will pardon my saying so," the houshi said. Kagome frowned.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't wish to upset you in any way, but I think it important that you understand," Miroku said, his expression losing a bit of its levity.

He tossed the stick his fish had been skewered on into the flames, watching as it was consumed.

"As I have mentioned before, your spiritual aura is very unique and very large. And because you were never taught to control it properly, it is easy to sense from quite a distance. That being the case…I believe it may have been you that attracted some of the youkai activity to your area.”

“After all, a powerful but essentially untrained miko is a prime target for any youkai that might want a quick boost in power. They eat you, absorb your abilities, and automatically become a power in the spirit world."

Kagome gaped at him, eyes growing wide.

"You don't mean…it's my fault that horde destroyed all those villages?" Her skin prickled, horror sliding over her like the cool brush of a snake's skin.

"I don't mean anything of the sort. You can only be held accountable for your own actions, and youkai will do as they want regardless of anything. So please…"

Miroku trailed off, drawing from her blank expression that she was not listening. He sighed, half-wishing that he could take the words back.

Kagome gazed fixedly at the left over half of her fish, no longer hungry. Her stomach churned. By the kami, had it truly been her fault? All those people…

There was something else, too, creeping around on the fringe of her mind. It was vaguely prickly, like…

"Miroku-sama," she said, the wheels in her mind abruptly set to turning. He looked up at her, surprised.

"Yes?"

"Can you feel that?" she asked.

The prickle had grown into the sting one might feel from a splinter. Miroku cocked his head questioningly at her.

"What do you-"

Kagome was already up, dashing over to the horse and desperately fishing through her enormous sack. The feeling had swiftly grown into a pain like being stabbed, though not a physical pain so much as a detached discomfort she could feel with her spiritual sense.

Miroku was up now, shakujou jangling in hand. He could obviously feel it as well, though the way that he kept turning to keep an eye on all directions told Kagome that he could not pinpoint the source of it either. With a yip of triumph she pulled her bow and arrows free of the sack.

Only to scream as she was knocked back and pinned roughly to the ground by countless thin, pointed insect legs, belonging to the youkai that had burst from the foliage directly behind her. She struggled and writhed vainly beneath it, watching as a torso that was humanoid and female bent down towards her face. It was a centipede youkai, Kagome realized, and a huge one at that.

"Kagome-chan!" Miroku called from somewhere to her right.

Kagome struggled harder, but the thing had her arms firmly pinioned to the ground, preventing even a simple warding gesture.

The youkai was face to face with her now, beady eyes staring into her own and rows upon rows of pointed fangs bared. It seemed to be sniffing her, moving down her stomach slowly as if scenting for something. It paused at her right hip, grinning fearsomely.

"Shikon…" it hissed, opening its mouth wide and sinking its jaws into the flesh of her hip.

Kagome shrieked. In a burst of pearly light, the youkai exploded.

Bits of green flesh rained down on the stunned miko and the houshi. Their eyes met amidst the debris, the houshi's hand frozen in its hold on the rosary wrapping the opposite hand.

"Are you alright, Kagome-chan?" he asked, shaking off his stupor and rushing to her side. Kagome ignored the hand he proffered to help her up, preferring to remain on the ground for the moment.

"I'm fine, I think," she managed.

The monster's fangs had barely pierced her skin before it had spontaneously exploded. Quiet reigned for a few moments, both of them absorbed in watching the falling pieces of flesh.

"Well, that was quite a start to our trip. Welcome to the wide world, Kagome-chan," Miroku joked feebly, more to break the silence than anything. A spindly leg landed atop his head, flailing slightly.

Kagome fell back against the ground, chuckling a bit hysterically. Welcome to the wide world.


	3. Of New Places and Night Meetings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter I make use of a lot of Japanese terminology, so I've decided to put in a few explanations on words that I think readers may not be familiar with:
> 
> -Ofuda- the paper slip with kanji on it (usually some kind of Buddhist chant or mantra) used to ward off evil or even create an area of protection
> 
> -Youkai- full demon (but I think most of you already know that one)
> 
> -Houshi- a monk of the Buddhist order (though I'm sure most are familiar with that as well)
> 
> -Tennō- roughly 'divine emperor' or 'heavenly emperor'. Term for the Emperor of Japan thought to be descended from the sun goddess Amaterasu, who was central to the Shintō religion. Also a concept specific to the Nara and Heian periods (died out with the birth of the bakufu in the Kamakura)
> 
> -Daigokuden-literally 'Great Audience Hall'. Building in the Heian palace used for important ceremonies and daily governmental affairs
> 
> -Burakuden-Building in the Heian palace used for official celebrations, banquets, and entertainment
> 
> -Shakujou- spiritualist staff that Miroku carries around with him. Wooden and gold topped with dangling rings
> 
> -Juni-hito- literally 'twelve layers'. The dress of women in the court during the Heian era. Think of a many, many layered kimono of silk and varying lengths (with a tie, but no obi). Though the name dictates twelve, it wasn't uncommon to find women in up to forty layers. Heavy and extremely extravagant
> 
> -Karaginu/haori- Inuyasha's red jacket in the series. It is also one of the top layers in a juni-hito, worn open and untied over all of the other layers. Think of a thigh-length overcoat
> 
> -Taiji-ya- demon slayers, which Sango is in the series
> 
> -Hiraikotsu- bone boomerang. Sango's weapon in the series
> 
> -Sakura- cherry blossom (the tree and the blossoms themselves)
> 
> -Yukata- light sleeping kimono
> 
> -Sashinuki- the red pants Inuyasha wears in the series. Can also be called hakama, but have this special name because of the way they are bloused at the ankles

Days passed uneventfully after the centipede youkai's attack. A routine was established.

Kagome and Miroku would rise with the sun, eat, and set out on horseback to cover as much ground as possible while there was light in the sky. At night they would pick a spot to settle. Miroku would go around their little camp placing wards and ofudas to prevent any further incidents.

The two would then eat once more before settling into their respective futons for the night. It took Kagome an inordinate amount of time to convince Miroku that the nights were not nearly cold enough to warrant his crawling into her futon with her.

The whole time Kagome was uneasy, too preoccupied to even think much on the fact that she was leaving her village further and further behind. She had been able to laugh off the first attack because she and Miroku had escaped relatively unscathed, but after considering the incident she had been left with several nagging questions.

The fact that the spirits and youkai were restless was unquestionable. They had been for quite some time. But the focus that the centipede youkai had seemed to have when attacking struck her as odd.

It had gone straight for her without so much as a glance to spare for Miroku or even the horse, which would have made an easy meal if that had been what it was after. Nor had it simply devoured her when it had the chance, but rather it had seemed to be searching for something on her person. It had muttered something along the lines of 'Shikon', or the like.

Miroku had offered no explanations or opinions on the matter. At times, though, Kagome had caught him gazing fixedly at the flames of their camp fire in a manner that suggested it nagged at him.

In addition, Kagome could sense other youkai nearby at almost all times of the night and day. That in and of itself would not have been strange, but there was a certain feeling of concentration and purpose to the way they followed so doggedly after the houshi and herself.

They never ventured too near, but were perpetually hovering around the edges of Kagome's spiritual sense. At night she could almost feel them pressed up against the barriers that Miroku erected, their eyes all fixed upon her. Kagome slept fitfully.

Miroku's words just prior to the attack continued to eat at her, as well, though she could never bring herself to broach the subject again with him. Had she really been the cause of all of those attacks? Had the youkai been after her? Was she at fault?

The guilt that thought caused nearly made her ill at times. She pushed it back, though, with the reassurance that at least now she was doing the right thing in going away to get proper training.

Despite it all, Kagome could not help but enjoy the journey a bit. They passed snow topped mountains so large that their tips grazed the clouds, and Kagome wondered if one might meet a kami by climbing to the top.

They traveled through forests so deep that they were actually pitch dark at their hearts, the tall trees clustered so closely together that their branches blocked out the sun. Kagome could feel spirits everywhere in those forests, skimming along her senses at every turn. It was a pleasant feeling, to be surrounded by so much life and energy.

They rode over rolling plains and tall grasses that seemed to stretch on ahead for small, gently swaying eternities. They even passed through a few small villages on the way, and Kagome felt such nostalgia at the sight of the tiny huts and the rough-hewn people that it might have been a thousand years since she had left home.

She learned that the land she lived in was one more beautiful than she had ever guessed, filled with much more than a muddy river that tended towards flooding and tiny dirt hills. She hoped secretly that they would allow her to do more traveling once she had been properly trained in the court.

* * *

The month or so it took to reach the court passed with surprising quickness. Kagome was caught off guard when Miroku announced that the capital and the court would probably be within sight sometime the next day.

The night of the announcement she lay in her futon after having eaten dinner, tired yet unable to rest. Her stomach was knotting up horribly at the thought of what was to come the next day. Though for the most part she had been able to avoid thinking about it during her journey, all of Kagome’s latent worries now congealed into a pressure that came to rest squarely on her chest.

She was not accustomed to wearing fine clothes, to bathing regularly, to speaking respectfully at all times, to acting the part of a delicate lady, to being constantly witty and entertaining, to deferring to everyone that she met. None of it had been necessary in her village.

She was aware of her ignorance in comparison to nobles. Her travels with Miroku had proven this to her several times over, though he had never mocked her for it.

But exactly how ignorant would she prove to be? She was prepared for them to be wary of her because of her low birth, but exactly how set against her would they be? She knew she was untrained compared to many other spiritualists, so would she be able to handle the training she was to be given?

Doubts nagged at her through the entire night like biting gnats, but at some point Kagome drifted off into a restless sleep.

* * *

In the morning she awoke feeling more tired than before she had gone to sleep, but sheer force of habit had her cleaning up the camp and mounting up behind Miroku.

"You are feeling well, Kagome-chan?" Miroku asked, nudging the horse into a trot.

They were on their way.

Kagome nodded feebly and then, remembering he could not see her, croaked out, "I'm fine."

His slight 'hmmmm' in response said he was not accepting that answer.

"Nervous about our arrival in the capital?" he pressed.

"I said I'm fine," Kagome repeated stubbornly, forcing a bit more cheer into her tone.

Despite the unconventional friendship that had grown between them over the course of the trip, she was reluctant to share her worries with Miroku. At the end of the day, he was still a nobleman and probably could not understand her concerns. There was no point in bothering him with her troubles.

"Rather than listening to what women say, I prefer to listen to what they mean," Miroku spouted, as if he were the sagest man in all of Japan. Kagome snorted a laugh, unable to help herself.

"So you obviously think that when women say 'hello, Houshi-sama', they _mean_ 'feel free to put your hands wherever you like', right?" Kagome quipped.

"I like to think so," Miroku replied lightly. Kagome chuckled despite herself, shaking her head.

"You're such a pervert," she said.

"I am a man of the cloth, Kagome-chan. It is impossible for me to be a pervert," Miroku said with a smile. "But far more importantly, do you feel better?"

The smile slipped from Kagome's face as she realized he had been trying to cheer her up, replaced quickly by a softer, warmer expression. She felt a rush of affection for the him, and the thought briefly occurred to her that he was like the inappropriately amorous older brother that she had never asked for. She hugged him lightly from behind, silently grateful.

"You won't abandon me when we get to court, right? You might be the only friend I'll have," Kagome confided.

"If anyone is allowed to know you as I have come to know you, I'm certain that you will have many more friends than just myself. Nonetheless, I promise not to abandon you," Miroku vowed.

"Thank you, Miroku-sama," Kagome said softly.

"Well, fellow outsiders in the court such as ourselves must stick together," Miroku said softly.

Kagome frowned, leaning out to peer at his face.

"What do you mean?" she said.

"Ah, well, unfortunately my history is an ignoble one, my dear Kagome-chan," Miroku said, a hint of discomfort creeping into his tone. "I was born and raised in the court, but I am not of the court. I belong to none of the noble clans that hold power there.”

“My father was merely a humble wandering houshi before the previous Tennō-sama invited him into the court to work as a spiritualist. Invited or not, though, my father was still of common birth and married a woman of similar standing, leaving me in quite an awkward position as far as the court is concerned."

"They've…have they been unkind to you because you're not noble by birth?" Kagome ventured, catching just the slightest hint of some past hurt in the furrow of his brow.

"Not unkind, Kagome-chan. The people of the court are far too refined to ever do anything so vulgar as to be unkind. Rather they are cold. Or perhaps condescending, at times. Theirs is the kind of politeness that can bite like the cut of a knife," Miroku said, affecting a careless shrug. Still there was a sadness to his eyes that betrayed him.

"I'm sorry," was all Kagome could manage, though she berated herself for the weakness of such a sentiment. "It must have been difficult for you."

She could sympathize with the loneliness of growing up in a place feeling different than everyone else and unable to do anything about it. Her heart ached at the thought of a young Miroku all alone in the midst of the court, wearing his easy grin to hide his sadness. One hand came up to clutch at the fabric of his robes, a small gesture of support.

"Now, now, Kagome-chan. No one need apologize for my life, least of all you. Besides, there are far worse things in the world than some exclusion. For instance, I have never had to struggle for daily survival as you and many of the impoverished villagers have," Miroku pointed out, veering the talk carefully away from his past.

"I suppose so," she replied softly. And then, forcing herself to shake off the gloom, "Everything will be fine in the court now. For the both of us, I am certain."

Miroku nodded along indulgently, and Kagome did not see the worry that lined his brow this time. 

They rode on towards the capital.

* * *

The sun was sinking low in the sky when Miroku nudged Kagome lightly with his elbow. She stirred, coming out of the daze she had fallen into. Twisting a bit to ease her cramping muscles, she rubbed her bleary eyes to clear the haze from them.

Turning forward and opening her mouth to ask Miroku why he had roused her, Kagome froze.

Never in her life had she imagined that something so grand could exist in the living world. Her grandfather had attempted to describe it to her, as had the few merchants passing through her village, but she realized that they had all failed to do it justice.

In the deep red of the setting sun glowed a low, long beige wall, stretching east to west as far as Kagome could see. The wall was topped by a light green roof of cypress wood, sloping gently downwards from a pointed peak.

"That's the Suzakumon gate. It encloses the entire Greater Palace as it stretches from south to north. Just inside the walls you can see the tops of the Daigokuden and the Burakuden buildings. You might be able to see a few of the residences of the clans and the baths, as well," Miroku informed her, pointing out the buildings as he spoke.

Shifting her gaze, Kagome could see the large structures just beyond the wall. Their roofs rose above the Suzakumon gate, a deeper green than the roof of the outer gate but still of the same cypress wood tiles.

They also sloped down from a point, though as the buildings were aligned north-south Kagome could see that the roof sloped down on both sides in a triangular formation with a slight overhang jutting out on all sides. What she could see of the walls was pure, unstained white with the edges of deep red pillars peeking out from beneath the overhangs.

"It's…it's so big," Kagome breathed, awed.

"You literally haven't seen even the half of it."

"What! How am I ever supposed to find my way around inside? It must be like a maze with all of those buildings and walls," Kagome said, intimidated by the very prospect.

"I doubt you will have to concern yourself with knowing all of it. The residences of the nobles make up the majority of the Greater Palace and are to be entered only on invitation.”

“The Daigokuden is used mainly for matters of state, so it is unlikely you will be summoned there. And the Inner Palace is the residence chiefly of the Tennō-sama and his consorts, along with their ladies-in-waiting. Unless the Tennō-sama takes quite a liking to you, you won't be going there," Miroku said.

"Alright," Kagome said, though her worry eased only slightly. She continued to study the structures with wide eyes, in awe at the idea that people had built such a thing. 

As the two large, wooden gates that they would enter through loomed closer, she had to make a conscious effort to breathe. Four fully armored guards came into view, equipped with spears and shields. Kagome's hands flexed nervously where they gripped Miroku's robes.

"Calm down, Kagome-chan. Breathe deeply," Miroku instructed gently, bringing the horse to a halt in front of the guards.

One of the four men stepped forward and Kagome took a deep breath, willing her heart to quiet. There was no turning back now.

"Name, rank and purpose," the guard said brusquely.

"Shingon Miroku. Imperial Spiritualist of the First Order. Returning from assignment to give my report," the houshi answered, equally businesslike.

"Seal," the guard said, extending an expectant hand.

Kagome turned a questioning look on Miroku, but he merely reached inside his robes and pulled out some small square of red lacquered wood. He handed it to the guard who studied it for a moment before nodding and returning it.

Miroku tucked it back into his robes before Kagome could get a good peek at it. She could only guess it was some kind of insignia.

"Welcome back, Houshi-sama. If you will dismount, we will have your horse and belongings tended to shortly."

Miroku nodded and slipped down lightly. One of the guards moved forward to help Kagome dismount, his rough face impassive. She regarded the man hesitantly from her perch. Miroku stepped forward casually as if he had not seen the man and extended his arms to assist her. With a grateful smile she allowed him to help her down.

"Does the lady have some sort of identification, as well?" asked the man who seemed to be the head guard.

The fourth guard stepped through the gate as the other two pulled it open, leading their horse and belongings away.

"She is my guest," Miroku stated, drawing himself up authoritatively. The guard did not so much as blink.

"Apologies, Houshi-sama, but if she does not have anything to verify that her presence in the court is welcomed, we can not allow her through," the guard replied.

He cast a disdainful eye over Kagome, mouth twisting slightly. She was suddenly very aware of the raggedness of her crude kosode and the filth she wore from head to foot. She flushed and dropped her eyes, torn between indignation and shame.

"Though she is unexpected, I assure you that the lady is not unwelcome," Miroku argued.

"We have our orders, Houshi-sama, and no one but the Tennō-sama is above them. You may pass if you wish, but the girl is to remain outside."

The guard bowed in what was meant to be an apologetic manner, but came off as more of a begrudging formality. Out of the corner of her eye Kagome saw the man wince as he straightened back up.

Miroku appeared only slightly ruffled by this unexpected turn, but the way in which he gripped his shakujou more tightly and squared his jaw hinted at an agitation that Kagome rarely saw from him. Silence stretched tensely on and she knew he was at a loss.

Kagome pushed back her embarrassment and forced her mind into action, feeling that it was time for her to do her part. She looked from her tight-lipped friend to the guard and back, considering.

She had nothing like the seal Miroku had shown and no one in the court to vouch for her presence. Miroku had brought her to the capital on more of a whim than an order, hoping that the Tennō and the court would find her spiritual abilities impressive enough to warrant her staying. Slight movement from the head guard caught her eye and Kagome saw he was rubbing discreetly at his back, his face pinched.

An idea struck her like a bolt from the blue. It was a long shot, but…

"Excuse me, sir," Kagome said, stepping forward from behind the human shield Miroku had created for her. Both the guard and the houshi focused on her, the guard's hand dropping from his back.

"I do not mean any insolence in saying this, but Houshi-sama was kind and gracious enough to bring me to the court because he saw something worthy in my spiritual abilities. If I could show you, as well, honorable sir, something worthy of entrance into court, would you be willing to allow me passage?"

Miroku watched her, waiting to see where she was going with this. The guard opened his mouth to reply, a refusal already written on his stern face. Kagome cut in quickly.

"For instance," she said in her most demure voice and with her most unassuming expression. "Your back is hurting you, is it not? Some kind of strain, I would guess. I could easily heal that for you."

The guard's eyes widened, his hand sliding unconsciously over the injured area.

"How in the world-"

"I sensed it, honorable sir. There is a slight disruption in your spiritual flow," Kagome fibbed, pushing her advantage.

She could sense the disturbance in his back now that she knew what to look for, but it had been his behavior that had tipped her off.

"Would you allow me to fix it for you?"

The man looked nervous, hand flexing uncertainly on his back. He shook his head slowly, a refusal on his lips.

"I assure you she is quite skilled. I have seen her work healing miracles before with a mere touch of her hand," Miroku interjected.

He had regained his usual composure, the easy smile resting loosely on his face. Kagome suppressed a grin, unsurprised at how comfortably he lied.

"There can be no loss on your part, honorable sir," she added, forcing him to take that last little step back into the figurative corner. "Either I will be able to heal you, or I will prove myself to be useless and you will not have to allow me entrance."

He faltered under their double assault, looking back to his fellow guardsmen for support. They were both watching intently now, curious to see what the girl could do. The head guard sighed, knowing he would seem a coward were he to refuse now.

"Well, alright, then. But make it quick and know that I make no promises."

With an internal cheer of victory, Kagome bowed and stepped forward. She circled around the man once, closing her eyes and getting a feel for exactly where the problem was.

It was the upper back, near the left shoulder and probably caused by some sort of strain when working with a sword. She extended a hand to hover over the injured area. The guard watched her warily, fighting not to jerk away.

Softly Kagome began to chant, invoking the words Kaede had taught her to ease the overburdened. The sounds danced joyfully in the air as they spilled from her lips, soft light gathering in her outstretched hands. She pressed her fingertips gently to his back to keep from startling him. The area glowed for a brief moment and it was done.

"Try moving your shoulder," Kagome instructed, stepping back to survey her work.

The guard did so, rotating it cautiously. His entire face seemed to furrow downward in astonisment as he frowned.

"It…doesn't hurt," he said quietly, awed. Kagome beamed.

"Then you will be happy to allow her to pass through the gate," Miroku said, not allowing the man a moment to recover from his shock. It was more of an assertion than a question.

"I guess so," muttered the man dazedly, still rotating his shoulder.

Miroku seized Kagome by the arm, pulling her along through the gates and calling over his shoulder, "Thank you very much for your understanding, and please have our belongings brought to the Shingon residence."

They were away from the gate so fast that it had Kagome's head spinning. All she could see of the inside of the Greater Palace and its people were blurs for a stretch as Miroku pulled her along at a quick clip.

He stopped on the steps of what appeared to be a temple in a small courtyard, empty of any people. Kagome gazed up at the grand structure once she had regained her balance, her head going light with awe again.

The colors of the building were muted in comparison to the brilliant reds, whites, and greens she had seen as they were approaching. The roof tiles were a quiet grey, the walls dull white, and the pillars and detailing a reserved brown.

The building sat on a raised wooden base and had the look of three buildings piled on top of one another, each with its own individual roof. The bottom layer was average in size, the middle exceptionally thin, and the top a much smaller rectangular building situated atop the two squares, the only one with the same triangular sloping roof that she had seen on the other buildings.

"-me-chan. Kagome-chan," Miroku called, touching her shoulder lightly. Kagome turned from the building to focus on him.

"Huh?"

"I've been calling you for a bit, but I believe you were too busy admiring the Shingonin. It's the only Buddhist temple within the court," he said, amused. "But I wanted to compliment you on your performance out there. That took more wit than I know most to possess."

"Well, I couldn't have pulled it off if you hadn't stepped in," Kagome demurred, glowing at such high praise and still flushed with her victory.

"So modest, Kagome-chan! Why I am certain that you must be the most charming, intelligent, and beautiful woman that I have-"

"Houshi-sama?" came a voice, halting the man's exaggerated rigmarole. Kagome turned gratefully to the person at the bottom of the steps.

It was a woman, and quite a beautiful woman at that. Her long, dark hair was tied at the ends with a white ribbon and pink powder covered the lids of wide, long-lashed brown eyes.

The layers of her silk juni-hito visible to Kagome were white with solid pink ellipses, trailing down to the ground and complimenting her moon pale skin. The sleeves of her karaginu overcoat enveloped her arms in their entirety, not even the tip of a finger peeking out. Beneath her quiet admiration of the woman, Kagome noticed that she looked displeased.

"Sango-sama!" Miroku exclaimed, going oddly stiff. "What a great pleasure it is to see you again!"

He bowed rigidly at the waist. The houshi looked more uncomfortable than Kagome had ever seen him before.

The woman was silent, gazing up at him with an inscrutable look. Kagome's glance shifted between the two, both of them seemingly oblivious to her presence. There was some sort of odd tension stretching like a wire between them, something she could not quite name. She wondered what the relationship between the two was.

Randomly Kagome's eyes began to sting, followed by her nose. She sneezed, the sharp little sound cutting the silence.

The wire snapped and both of them whipped their heads around to face her. Kagome smiled sheepishly.

"Excuse me."

"Ah!" the young woman gasped, raising a long sleeve to cover her mouth primly. "Please excuse my great rudeness! I am Tachibana Sango, of the Tachibana clan. We serve Japan's rulers faithfully as taiji-ya."

She pressed her hands together through her trailing sleeves and bowed gracefully.

Good manners dictated that Kagome should respond with her own introduction. Reluctantly she did so.

"I am Kagome. Common born. I serve as a miko in my village."

"Oh."

Sango's face fell, taking in Kagome's rough appearance for the first time.

"I brought her to the court because of her immense spiritual powers," Miroku said, coming to Kagome's aid. Sango's gaze turned to him, the look in her pretty eyes sharpening.

"I see."

Sensing another awkward silence coming on, Kagome cleared her throat. "So, Houshi-sama, what exactly were you planning to do now?"

"I need to meet with the Tennō-sama to inform him of my findings," he replied. "During the report, I will attempt to arrange for an introduction between his Majesty and yourself, Kagome-chan. I do believe, however, that it would be best if you could be…tidied up before you are presented."

"Might I offer my assistance?" Sango spoke up. "I could accompany her to the baths and have proper attire arranged while you do your part."

"If it is not too much of a bother, I would be very grateful to you, Sango-sama," Miroku said, a wide, genuine smile stretching across his face. "Truly you are much too kind."

"Not at all. Why don't we get going, Kagome-san?"

Sango turned and began walking in measured, graceful steps, obviously expecting Kagome to follow along. She bid a quick farewell to the houshi before trailing after her, her steps considerably less refined.

"Thank you once again, generous Sango-sama. I leave Kagome-chan in your most competent and beautiful hands and look forward to seeing the both of you later on," Miroku called after them. Kagome saw Sango flush slightly, bowing her head to cover it.

"Thank you so much, Tachibana-sama. I truly appreciate you doing this for me," Kagome said, feeling it only proper that she express the sentiment herself.

"Ah, no, not at all, Kagome-san. I am certain you must be thankful to finally be away from the houshi. Though you are probably already aware of it, he has a tendency towards…the indecent," Sango grated out, her lovely face strained momentarily with irritation.

"No, it truly was not that bad, Tachibana-sama. I mean, Miroku-sama-" Kagome began in a placating manner.

"So then you welcomed his advances? Perhaps you have taken a liking to him?" Sango interjected, ice crackling in her voice. Her graceful gait had turned into a small stomping of her wooden geta sandals beneath the hem of her robes.

"Nothing like that, Tachibana-sama!" Kagome exclaimed, baffled by the other woman's behavior. "It might sound presumptuous of me to say it, but Miroku-sama and I became good friends on our trip. Like…brother and sister almost."

Sango halted, turning to Kagome with an unasked question in her eyes. Kagome vigorously in answer. The quick succession of relief followed by rose-red embarrassment on Sango's face was almost comical to watch, but Kagome managed to keep from laughing.

"I apologize, Kagome-san, for my odd behavior, but it has been a trying day," Sango said, bowing. "The thought that the houshi might have been bothering you with his indecent advances did not sit well with me."

"No need to apologize, Tachibana-sama. We all have our off days, and even on such a trying day you offered to take care of me. You must truly be a very generous person," Kagome returned graciously, relieved at the easing of tension between them.

Sango uttered a few denials for the sake of humility, resuming her leisurely walk. Kagome followed, surreptitiously attempting to match her tiny steps.

The noblewoman's attitude toward the miko warmed considerably as they continued on along the stone paths, winding around enclosed noble residences and small official buildings in various reds, greens, and whites. They all had some architectural variance of square building on a raised base with white walls, triangular sloping green roofs, and supporting red pillars under the eaves, with a few exceptions here and there.

Sango pointed out each building as they passed, giving its name, function, and a bit of the history of its clan if it were a residence. Kagome listened intently, trying to store all the information away for the future.

In the between times Sango asked about Kagome's life and her village, doing her own share of intent listening. Kagome related to her every detail she could think of, and the other woman seemed to absorb it all with utmost interest.

Kagome could not help her surprise, though it made her feel a bit ungenerous for having doubted the woman with no real knowledge of her. Sango's initial reaction to her status had seemed to bode very ill, but it looked now as if that had merely been an instinctive reaction.

The more they talked, the more Sango proved herself to be friendly and open minded, not even pulling so much as a face when Kagome stumbled in her etiquette or speech…or just plain stumbled, as she had managed to do a couple of times in her initial nervousness.

The other courtiers that they happened to cross paths with, however, did not prove themselves quite as tolerant as Kagome's escort.

Every so often the pair would come across a group out for an evening stroll, most of them women, and Sango would stop in order to give the acknowledgement that etiquette dictated proper.

She would introduce Kagome, as well, and each time the miko had the great pleasure of watching the courtiers' expressions twist with varying degrees of distaste. Certainly Sango was turning out to be the exception rather than the rule. Kagome was vaguely disheartened by the brief encounters, but forgot most of her perturbation in the face of Sango's warmth.

Darkness had covered the sky completely by the time they reached the bath-house, a large red wooden building much plainer in style than the others. From a chimney at the top billowed a continuous cloud of steam, puffing gently up into the blackness of the night sky.

"The baths are heated?" Kagome asked, gazing up at it.

"Of course," Sango replied, amused at the excitement she could see blooming on the younger woman's face. "Would you like to go in?"

Kagome nodded eagerly, forgetting her manners for a moment and rushing in before Sango. Sango merely smiled and shook her head when she turned back to apologize.

The inside of the baths was thick with steam, muggy warmth enveloping the two as they entered. The floor was made entirely of wood, not a bit of it dirt as Kagome was accustomed to.

A lowered space where they first entered provided a place for the two to leave their shoes, which they did before continuing inside. At the far end of the room were two large baths built into the floor. Water spilled over the edges occasionally as the courtiers inside moved about.

"These are the group baths," Sango explained. "They are for rinsing off a final time before leaving the bath house. We need to go upstairs to the more private baths first."

Kagome nodded and trailed after her as she ascended the staircase on the right. On the second floor there was a corridor with a series of curtains on both sides. Sango walked down it a ways before selecting a curtain and pushing it aside to enter.

Inside was a moderate sized room with a small heated bath in the center and a few shelves on the far wall. Sango went over to the shelves and pulled from them a few colorful bottles and washing cloths. She began removing the top layers of her juni-hito.

"You are taking a bath, too, Tachibana-sama?" Kagome asked, feeling that it must violate some unwritten rule for a noblewoman and a commoner to bathe together.

"Of course. You will need someone to help you wash properly, and I was planning on taking one soon anyway."

The reply was casual and unconcerned. Kagome felt a little touched somehow.

"Kagome-san? Would you mind helping me with my juni-hito? Sorry to bother you, but I usually bring an attendant. Winter is approaching and I am up to fifteen layers," Sango said sheepishly.

"Oh, certainly," Kagome said, walking over to her. Silently she marveled at how Sango had even been able to move in fifteen layers of heavy silk.

Together they removed the layers of fine fabrics and embroidery, placing them with care on the shelves. Kagome removed her own few layers and they both slipped into the bath.

Kagome felt all her aching muscles turn to mush in the soothing warmth, a pleased sigh escaping her. She was certain she had never felt anything quite so nice in her entire life, sinking blissfully down into the water up to her chin. Sango watched the girl with affectionate amusement, relaxed by the unassuming nature of her company.

After a few moments of contented soaking, Sango handed Kagome a cloth and they both began to wash. Sango added a bit of something from a pink tinted glass bottle to the water and the scent of aloe and sandalwood rose with the steam to fill the room.

Kagome inhaled deeply, continuing to scrub at her skin with the rag. It was strange to see the cloth turning brown with dirt as patches of her skin began to show through.

"Dip your head under, Kagome-chan, and I will wash your hair for you," Sango suggested when they had both finished. Kagome noted her change in address and smiled.

"Alright."

Kagome ducked down beneath the warm water, closing her eyes and savoring the brief feeling of weightlessness. When she emerged Sango was behind her with a purple bottle in her hands.

She poured from it some thick liquid, rubbing it between her hands before working it into Kagome's hair. The older woman worked slowly and carefully, untangling numerous snarls and working the substance in thoroughly. It had a pleasant, light scent to it and Kagome found her eyes sliding shut of their own volition.

"Umm…Tachibana-sama?" Kagome said.

"Sango."

"Huh?"

"You can call me Sango, Kagome-chan. Tachibana-sama does not seem right coming from you," Sango said, her hands still working away diligently.

"Oh…alright, then. Thank you, Sango-sama," Kagome said, her voice soft. The allowance of such informality was no small gesture.

Sango chuckled.

"I suppose that will do for now. You wanted to ask me something?"

"I was just wondering…and please tell me if it is too presumptuous of me to ask, but I was curious as to how you and Miroku-sama know one another?" Kagome hazarded, treading cautiously on the fine line of propriety. She always had been too curious for her own good.

The hands woven into her dark hair stilled. Kagome tensed, realizing that she had pushed Sango's kindness too far. She flailed about mentally, trying to find something to say. But the hands stiffly resumed their work and she closed her mouth.

"Ahahahaha…Why, there's no particular relationship between the houshi and I. We're barely acquaintances really. I mean, what woman could ever develop a relationship with such…such an _indecent_ man," Sango said a bit too loudly.

Her fingers flexed against Kagome's scalp, scratching lightly. Kagome winced but remained silent.

"I see," she said, grateful she had not lost a friend over her impertinence. She decided not to push the issue any further, despite Sango's suspicious answer.

"So what about your clan, Sango-sama? You mentioned something about taiji-ya," Kagome said, guiding the conversation back onto safer ground.

"Rinse," Sango ordered.

Kagome dunked her head again. She was excited to find her hair soft, knotless, and pleasant smelling when she resurfaced, running her fingers through the slippery locks wonderingly.

"Do you mind returning the favor?" Sango asked, handing Kagome the bottle before dipping under the water.

Kagome repeated Sango's earlier actions, pouring the substance into her hands and working it into the noblewoman's hair when she came back up.

She worked tentatively, wary of making mistakes. Sango's hair was much nicer than her own, she noted absently, long and soft with few snarls in it.

"My clan has been serving the Tennō-sama for generations and generations," Sango began. "We are taiji-ya by trade, each of us trained in the art of youkai extermination from a very young age. That was how we originally gained our noble status so many years ago."

"Are you trained in the art?"

"Of course," Sango answered, a note of pride in her voice. "I have been trained since I was young in all of the warrior arts, but I specialize with Hiraikotsu."

She looked so pleased with herself that Kagome was hesitant to question it, but asked anyway, "What is a Hiraikotsu?"

"Oh, sorry, I forget that most people do not know what that is," Sango said, laughing sheepishly. "It is…well, it's…How about I just show it to you? I am not quite sure how to explain it in a way that would do it justice."

Kagome nodded.

"Have you been out in the field often?" she asked.

"Not often. Too much fighting is unbefitting of a noblewoman," Sango said, the words practiced and resigned in the way of a lesson reluctantly learned.

"But I have been out enough to understand what goes on. Mostly we are only employed in defending the capital itself, but a few times I have been further out. The villages are virtually defenseless and the people always look like they are in the midst of hard times."

"They always are," Kagome admitted quietly, sobering at the memory of her own little village.

Sango winced, realizing she had accidentally prodded a sore spot.

"I apologize, Kagome-chan. It must have been hard for you," she said with soft sincerity.

"A bit," Kagome said dismissively, shaking her head to clear it. "But it's all alright now. My village will be fine, and you've been kind enough not to make it difficult for me here."

"Well, if you ever need anything…." Sango left the sentence open, but Kagome understood well enough.

"Thank you, Sango-sama. I will not hesitate to ask."

They finished their bath in amicable silence, grabbing their things and going downstairs for the finishing soak before drying off. They applied some kind of aloe lotion from a third green bottle to their skin before redressing and going to Sango's residence.

The residence was a large, sprawling one near the center of the Greater Palace and, Sango informed Kagome, near to the Inner Palace where the Tennō resided. Several smaller buildings were spread throughout the enclosed space, connected to the main house with covered walkways.

There was a large garden in the back filled with walking paths and sakura trees, beneath one of which was a koi pond. Kagome had the continuous, disorienting feeling of having entered some alternate world, clean and beautiful and full of good smells in a way that her small world in the village never had been. It was amazing.

Even in her awe, though, she noticed how empty the residence was, save a few servants scattered here and there. Sango explained that many of the members of her clan were currently out on duty because of all of the unrest amongst the youkai.

Kagome was quietly relieved at not having to deal with any more nobles. It would have been foolish of her to assume that everyone in Sango's clan was as kind and open as Sango had proven to be.

At one point Sango stopped to speak with a servant, requesting that the woman have clothes brought for Kagome until Sango could arrange to have some made for her. Kagome protested at this, but Sango would have none of it.

The older woman seemed to have made it her personal mission to see to Kagome's happiness and comfort. Kagome surrendered in the end, secretly pleased by Sango's concern for her.

After the two had finished touring the residence, Sango led Kagome to one of the detached houses where she had arranged a room to be set up. The clothes she had ordered were laid out in the room when they arrived, including two juni-hitos, traditional miko garb, and a light sleeping yukata.

Kagome bowed and apologized and thanked the noblewoman profusely for going to the trouble, but Sango waved her off nonchalantly. The noblewoman soon left her to get to sleep as it had grown late.

With the help of the servant Sango had summoned, Kagome put on the two light layers of the sleeping yukata. The servant would have taken her old clothes to be burned, but Kagome stopped her. Somehow she could not bear to part with them, no matter how out of place they proved to be in the court.

The servant woman gave her an odd look, but bowed respectfully and left Kagome to retire for the night. Kagome crawled into the large futon that had been laid out, warm and clean and comfortable.

* * *

She could not sleep.

Time stretched on interminably in the darkness and every moment Kagome felt more awake. She knew she should have been tired after such a long day. She even tried arguing this to her uncooperative body. Still she could not find rest and at last she became so frustrated that she had to get up and move.

At first she stuck with pacing around inside her room, hoping to wear herself out. That quickly became annoyingly repetitive, and she wondered if maybe some fresh air would help calm her enough to sleep. She was accustomed to sleeping close to the outdoors, after all, and to hearing the whispering of the wind and the cooing of birds as she drifted off. She crept quietly out to the garden behind the main house.

It was an especially dark night, and Kagome realized that it was a new moon. Even with little light, though, the closed blossoms of the sakura were beautiful to behold. She looked forward to spring when they would bloom, imagining sitting beneath them to share a meal with Sango and Miroku.

The night was reasonably warm, despite the fact that winter was fast approaching. For a time Kagome amused herself with wandering the paths aimlessly, trying to take in everything that had come to pass. It all seemed too surreal, even as she stood in the midst of it.

When she was at last forced to abandon her ambling by the low wall that enclosed the Tachibana residence, she turned her eyes skyward to search for the brightest star. She spotted it quickly, along with a huge Enoki tree stretching so far up in to the sky that the stars seemed to hang from its massive branches.

Kagome craned her head back to gaze up at the behemoth, her eyes going wide. It seemed to be glowing in the sight of her spiritual sense, its aura a deep golden the likes of which she had never seen before. It felt…warm, somehow.

Seized by a sudden urge, Kagome took off in as quiet a run as she could manage, winding her way out of the gardens and through the front gate of the residence.

It took a bit of back tracking and running in circles, but eventually she managed to reach the tree. It towered majestically in the center of the open garden area that Sango had named as the En no Matsubara, presiding with silent authority.

Kagome slowed her approach, reverence in her every step. Its aura pulsed gently as she came forward, enveloping her own in its otherworldly warmth. She stretched her hands out towards the trunk, breath catching in her throat as her palms made contact with the rough bark of it.

"What in the seven hells are you doing?"

Kagome yelped in surprise, heart jolting in her chest. Her eyes cast about wildly in the surrounding darkness in search of the source of the unexpected voice.

The indistinct outline of what she guessed to be young man sat nearly hidden amidst a tangle of protruding roots at the base of the tree. It was hard to make out much of him in the dim light of the stars, but his dark eyes seemed almost to glow as he peered out at her.

His hair, long and so dark it almost blended with the night sky, was draped haphazardly amongst the roots, and he wore a deep black karaginu and sashinuki of some fine looking material. He most definitely looked the part of a noble.

"I…ah, I'm sorry…I…I didn't mean..to…," Kagome fumbled, hardly able to get anything out past her mortification at having been seen. She bowed low at the waist, her face flaming at her unintentional intrusion.

"I didn't ask for an apology, woman," the man huffed, and there was a slight rustling as he shifted deeper back into the shelter of the roots.

Kagome frowned, peering up at him from her bow. He flapped a dismissive hand in her direction.

"I’m saying feel free to get lost. You're annoying." 

He turned his gaze away from as if that were the final word on the matter. 

Kagome rose up from her bow, her back going straight with indignation. Noble he may be, but that hardly gave him the right to act so boorishly towards her.

"I've hardly said two words to you! What right've you to say I'm annoying?" she shot back, her chin tilting up petulantly.

"Good to know you can form a whole sentence. So I'll try this again, nice and slow for you this time-What in the seven hells are you doing out here?" the man responded, seemingly unconcerned with the fact that he had been chastised by someone beneath him in status.

"The tree," Kagome said begrudgingly. "I sensed its aura and I wanted to come see it up close."

"Goshinboku? Sensed its aura?" This seemed to get his attention and the man extricated himself from his resting place in the roots, standing. He had very strong features, obvious even in the darkness.

"I'm a miko of the Shintō order. The tree…it's got a very strong aura," she explained, her ire cooling momentarily as the barrage of insults ceased.

"Huh? Of course Goshinboku has an aura. It's ancient. You must be pretty dense if you've never sensed it before."

Irritation flared quickly once more. "I'm not dense! This is my first day in the capital!"

"What?" he said, moving forward slightly to examine her. "Well, I can't remember seeing your face before, but just about everyone here in the court looks about the same anyway."

"Well, I'm not of the court. I just arrived today. The houshi Miroku-sama brought me," Kagome said.

"That lech?" the man burst out, eyes widening. "You ain't pregnant with his kid, are you?"

"No! No!...What? No!"

The man snorted. "Then why’d he bring you?"

"My spiritual abilities. Miroku-sama thinks they will prove useful," Kagome said, cheeks flushed with the indecency of his previous suggestion.

"So that's what he did when he was out there," the man muttered, more to himself than to her. "Figures he'd find a way to bring a woman back. You're village born, huh?"

"Yes. My name is Kagome," she offered, years of etiquette training making the offering of her name almost reflexive.

"Kagome?" he echoed as if testing the word, and somehow she was unsurprised at the liberty he took with her name. "You're pretty mouthy for a miko."

"And you're pretty coarse for a courtier," Kagome returned, bristling once more. Their eyes met through the dark, holding for a long moment in silent challenge.

"Feh. Whatever."

With a huff the man turned to look out towards the horizon. There was something vaguely anxious in his gaze and Kagome turned to look as well. All she could see were stars.

"I never asked why _you_ were out here in the middle of the night," she said, the thought occurring to her suddenly.

"So does that mean you're gonna ask now?" he said, glancing at her from the corner of his eye.

"I am asking."

"Didn't sound like a question."

"Fine. What were you doing out here in the middle of the night?" Kagome sighed. It was like speaking with a small child.

"Thinking," he replied.

"Thinking?"

"Yes, thinking. It's probably not something you're real familiar with," he quipped. There was just the barest hint of a smirk lingering around the corners of his lips, and Kagome could have sworn he was getting some kind of enjoyment out of this.

"What were you thinking _about_ out here at this time of night, oh sage one?" Kagome said, fighting the urge to roll her eyes.

"Keh! Lots of stuff."

"Lots of stuff?" she echoed incredulously, pressing a harried hand to her forehead. "Thank you for being so terribly candid with me."

"Fancy word, woman."

"Only to you."

Kagome was already in mid-glare by the time she began to wonder how they had degenerated back to that again. It was odd, though. Beneath all of her ire…some part of her was enjoying this a bit. It was a relief to be able to speak so freely. And the brightness of his eyes in the dark suggested that she might not be alone in that.

Abruptly the man looked away. Light was beginning to tinge the edges of the sky and there was alarm on his face.

"I gotta go."

He started to walk off, but paused and turned back to her. 

"See you next new moon, wench."

"It's Kagome!" she called after him, but he was already gone.

With a small laugh, the young woman turned and walked back to the Tachibana residence. When she lay down in her futon for the second time she drifted off immediately, realizing just before she passed out that she had never gotten the strange man's name.

* * *

In the morning when a servant came in to wake her, Kagome found that she felt oddly well rested despite how little sleep she had actually gotten.

The servant helped her to dress before she could go meet Sango for breakfast, though Kagome opted to wear the miko garb of a white long-sleeved karaginu and red hakama with tabi socks and zori sandals. She was afraid of the effort it would take to put on one of the fifteen layered juni-hito.

The servant then brought in a basin of water for her to wash her face before helping her to comb out her long hair. Once she was deemed presentable the servant led her into a large main sitting hall containing a long, low dining table of shining dark wood. Miroku and Sango were both seated on cushions at the table, apparently awaiting her arrival to begin breakfast.

"Kagome-chan! Why, you look even lovelier than I could have imagined," exclaimed Miroku, jumping up from his place at the table to lead Kagome to a seat. 

The gesture was distinctly brotherly, but she could not help glancing at Sango to see her reaction. Her friend had turned her face away quickly.

Kagome mumbled an awkward thank you and sat down, still looking anxiously towards the noblewoman. The taiji-ya turned back to face the table after instructing a servant to bring in breakfast. A too wide smile was plastered firmly to her face.

Kagome winced, looking towards Miroku to see if he had noticed. He was putting more effort into looking disinterested than she thought necessary, examining his hashi with great interest.

"How did you sleep, Kagome-chan? And as the houshi so kindly pointed out, you do look lovely. The miko robes really suit you," Sango said stiffly, though a little sincerity slipped in at the end. It seemed to be her own attempt at nonchalance.

"I slept…well," Kagome said, opting not to tell the two about her late night encounter.

It seemed a little too risqué to be proper, and in the light of day she half-thought that it was just some odd dream brought on by nerves.

"And thank you again for the robes, Sango-sama. This is probably the nicest thing I've worn in all my life. I'm glad you think it suits me."

Sango's smile softened around the edges.

"Not at all, Kagome-chan."

"We have something very important to do today, Kagome-chan," Miroku spoke up, sensing that the tension in the room had dissipated. "I was unable to meet with the Tennō-sama last night due to the fact that his Majesty was not feeling well.”

“However, I did manage to speak to a few members of the Council morning of State to arrange a meeting for today. After conversing a bit on the issue, the Council members thought it best that you and I be presented together to his Majesty."

"Oh, alright," Kagome said, relieved at the idea of having Miroku with her when she met with the Tennō. The houshi, however, looked slightly shamefaced.

"I am afraid that that was not all that they decided," he confessed. "They also said that it would be best that our meeting be a public one, rather than a private meeting with the Tennō-sama. All those currently residing in the court will be invited to a welcoming ceremony, to see you with their own eyes."

Kagome had gone cold at the words 'welcoming ceremony'. A ceremony centering around her, and so soon after her arrival…she wasn't prepared in the least…

"I am truly sorry, Kagome-chan," Miroku said, his face sincerely apologetic. "I tried to inform the Council that you would most certainly be uncomfortable with such an arrangement, but they would not budge. This is simply how things are done in the court."

"Kagome-chan," Sango said sympathetically, coming over to kneel beside her friend. She pulled back one of the sleeves of her karaginu, placing a hand consolingly over the miko's.

"I'm alright," Kagome managed, trying to convince herself. Sango's hand on her own returned some warmth to her. She flashed the older woman a grateful smile.

"I mean, I am a bit scared, but Miroku-sama has gone to so much trouble to bring me to court in the first place, so I have to start doing my own share in all of this. I will be just fine, I promise."

"That's the spirit," Miroku said approvingly. Sango nodded heartily in agreement, patting the Kagome's hand before returning to her place.

"When is this 'welcoming ceremony' to take place, Miroku-sama?" Kagome asked, picking up her hashi and attempting a few bites. Her stomach felt unsettled.

"When the sun is at its highest point in the sky. We still have some time yet," Miroku replied, beginning to eat as well.

The delicious fish Kagome had been chewing turned to sand in her mouth, but she forced herself to swallow and continue eating. She knew she would need any strength she could muster.

"And exactly how many courtiers will be there?" she made herself ask, bracing inwardly for the reply.

"Oh, not nearly so many as there used to be in the capital. Only some hundreds are here currently," Sango said in what was meant to be a heartening manner.

For a village girl who had not seen even a hundred people in all her fifteen years of life, it was not quite so comforting.

"Many of the courtiers moved back out to the residences on their own lands when the current Tennō-sama ascended to the throne."

"The courtiers have separate residences outside the capital?" Kagome asked, curious and glad for the momentary distraction.

"You did not know?" said Sango. "I suppose your village is not one of the ones connected to a clan, then. Well, almost every properly established clan owns a good amount of land granted to them by the Tennō-sama, and the capital is the sole property on the Tennō-sama himself, though the courtiers are allowed to have residences here in order to be near the court.”

“But almost all of them also have residences on their own lands, as well, and usually the lands that they own coincide with a few villages that people have set up. Thus the clan who owns the land also owns the village on it and is responsible for its care."

"That makes sense," said Kagome contemplatively. "It must be good for those villages to have the courtiers' protection, especially in these times."

"Not quite, though it might seem that way at first glance," Sango said, frowning. "The villages get a bit of protection, but most of the efforts of the guards and spiritualists are focused around protecting the residence itself. On top of that, the villages have to pay a percentage of their crops in taxes to the clan in return for being allowed to work the fields on their lands.”

“I mean, the villagers are given better tools and plots and irrigation systems to work with, but a lot of the harvest still goes towards the clan's wealth. They might be worse off in the end than unconnected villages such as yours that are left to their own devices."

"That…doesn't seem right," Kagome said, troubled. Would her village become like that now that it was connected to the capital?

"Unfortunately that is also simply how the court works," Miroku said with a certain amount of resignation.

It should not be, Kagome could not help but think. She finished her meal in silence and rose, bowing to both of her friends.

"Thank you very much for the meal. It was delicious," Kagome said, though that was a small lie. While she was certain that it must have been delicious, her frustrations had kept he from tasting most of it.

"Would you mind if I went and meditated out in the garden until it is time for us to go, Sango-sama? I'd like to try to collect myself before the ceremony."

"Alright. I will come get you a bit before we have to leave so that we can make certain you are looking your best. You probably would not be surprised to learn that appearances are very important here in the court."

"Really? I never would have guessed," Kagome joked, fingering the fine cloth of her karaginu. She exited towards the gardens.

The bite of winter was back in the air despite the strong sunlight, but Kagome found the cold did not seep in through her new robes the way that it had through her old clothes.

She picked out a spot beneath a sakura tree near the koi pond, sitting down cross legged with her hands resting on her knees. She closed her eyes and began to concentrate on her breathing.

Panic jabbed at her a few times from the edges of her mind, trying draw her back to worry over the impending ceremony and the plight of the villages, but Kagome expelled it with each exhale.

Through the palms on her knees she drew in small amounts of the spiritual energy from the hibernating tree behind her and the fish swimming leisurely in the pond, absorbing their peace into herself. Soon she had managed to lose herself amid the quiet, continuous pulse of the surrounding nature. Time swept by her oblivious form like the rush of a river over smooth stones.

When the sun had climbed high in the sky a hesitant hand reached out and tapped her lightly on the shoulder. Kagome slipped back up into her body like one resurfacing from the depths of water. Sango was there, looking apologetic for having disturbed her.

"Is it time to get ready?" Kagome asked, rotating her shoulders to clear the stiffness from them. Sango nodded.

"Yes. My apologies. You looked so peaceful like that. Actually I walked past you a couple of times and did not even notice you were sitting there. You looked like a part of nature, somehow."

"That's pretty much the goal of it," Kagome said, pleased at the admiration in her friend's tone.

"Could you teach me how to do it sometime? It would probably prove useful right before I have to go out on a mission," Sango said, assisting Kagome in her clumsy attempts to stand. The miko's legs had gone entirely to sleep.

"Certainly," Kagome said readily.

Sango aided her in hobbling back to the side house that was her current residence, Kagome fighting back pained giggles at the pinpricks that coursed through her legs as they regained feeling. Sango helped Kagome to wash her face thoroughly and re-comb her hair.

"Are you sure you do not want to wear one of the juni-hito? The blue one would really make your eyes stand out," Sango said, holding up the karaginu of the aforementioned juni-hito.

"That's alright, Sango-sama. I have a feeling I won't be near as graceful as you are the first few times I wear a juni-hito, and I don't think that's quite the impression I want to make on the court. Besides, I'm presenting myself as a spiritualist, so I might as well look the part."

"True," Sango allowed, a bit disappointed as she set the overcoat back down amongst the other layers.

Sango was eager to see how her new friend would look in the formal attire of the court. She anticipated her proving to be a classical beauty, maybe even _the_ court beauty. That would easily win the approval of the male courtiers, if nothing else.

"Are we done, then?" Kagome asked, examining herself in the round hand mirror Sango had given her. She certainly looked clean and tidy enough to at least not stick out so much.

"Ah! Just one more thing!" Sango exclaimed, rushing as much as her juni-hito would allow over to a small, ornate wooden chest. She opened it and pulled out a circular box of ivory, bringing it back over to Kagome.

Sango knelt down beside her, removing the lid from the box and placing it aside. Inside was a series of different sized brushes and several powders of varying hues.

"Your skin is a bit tan from the time you have spent out in the sun. We can use powder to make you appear pale until it fades," Sango explained, taking out one of the brushes and dipping it into the white powder.

She swiped the brush lightly over Kagome's face and neck to the edge where robe met skin. Kagome watched in the mirror as her skin was turned as pale as Sango's. Suddenly her grey eyes seemed very obvious in contrast.

"It smells a bit funny," Kagome said, wrinkling her nose. "What is it made of?"

"You probably do not want to know," replied Sango, replacing the brush in the box. Kagome pulled a face.

"Hmmm," Sango hummed, turning Kagome's face this way and that to examine her work. "That is good, it makes your eyes stand out a bit more, but there is still something missing…"

Picking up a smaller brush, Sango dabbed it in some deep blue powder and ordered Kagome to close her eyes. Lightly she painted over the lids of her eyes.

Kagome opened her eyes when Sango had finished and examined her face in the mirror. It was amazing how powder could alter a person, she reflected. She turned her face this way and that, admiring the effect on her reflection.

The pale skin and blue shadow covering her eyes made her look regal in a distant sort of way, her unusual gray eyes sharp and obvious. It was a slight advantage she was grateful for.

"Thank you, Sango-sama. I think I am much more suited to face them all now."

"You will be fine, Kagome-chan. The houshi seems to have a lot of faith in you, and I know that he does not rest his faith lightly on things," Sango said soothingly, putting away the ivory box.

So much for the two of them being 'barely acquaintances', Kagome observed slyly. She nodded anyway, accepting the praise.

"Well, it is time for us to be going. Are you ready?" said Sango.

"As ready as ever I will be."

"Then let us go."

Sango took Kagome's hand, and together they headed to the Daigokuden for the meeting that would decide Kagome’s fate.

* * *

When they reached the looming, multi-roofed building, Sango was allowed to enter while Kagome was instructed to remain outside until the courtiers finished arriving.

Sango parted with her friend reluctantly, pressing both of her hands and wishing her luck before going inside to join her clan.

Fear began to wiggle its way into Kagome's pounding heart at the parting, but she fought it back valiantly with the memory of her earlier peace in the garden. She had to maintain her composure to get through this.

Miroku soon joined her in waiting outside, informing her that it would only be a matter of moments before they were allowed to enter. She truly hoped so, because the waiting was beginning to wear her thin.

At last a court guardsman emerged from the building and informed them that it was time for their entrance.

Miroku gave her a gentle smile and squeezed her hand reassuringly. She nodded, her heart thumping wildly in the pit of her stomach. Returning her nod, Miroku stepped through the doors first. Kagome stepped through behind him, a dizzying rush of blood surging up to pound in her ears.

The sight that greeted her was almost more than she could take in.

The building was spacious and low roofed inside, lined around the walls with red pillars. On both her left and right sides knelt a sea of nobles on the polished wooden floor, in an array of colored silks and finery so bright and varied that Kagome thought she might go blind. They formed a long aisle down which Miroku was slowly walking, Kagome trailing after him with steps as small and carefully measured as she had ever seen Sango take.

At the end of the seemingly eternal aisle was a raised dais with a few steps leading up to it. It was topped with an ornate throne of gold and ivory, pictures of the sun goddess Amaterasu carved into the bottom.

The throne, though, was partially obscured by a slatted golden silk screen set up in front of it. Through it Kagome could see the indistinct outline of a man, which she could only assume to be the Tennō himself. She remembered Miroku mentioning to her once that the Tennō always sat behind a screen, only permitting those of the highest rank and his direct servants to view his hallowed person.

At the right side of the throne knelt a strikingly beautiful, incredibly pale woman in a red and white juni-hito upon an intricately embroidered silk cushion. Her face, despite the fineness of her features, looked horribly cold.

The whole room had begun buzzing upon Kagome's entrance, fans flapping excitedly in every hand, but silence fell as the houshi and the miko came to kneel at the base of the throne. Both bowed low.

Kagome waited for Miroku to rise before lifting her own head, trying to focus on him and tune out all else. She did not dare to try and search for Sango among the strange painted faces of the crowds.

"Your Majesty," the houshi began grandly, raising his voice to carry throughout the room. "I have returned from the honor of my assignment to report my findings on the situation along the southern edge."

He paused, awaiting the response.

"Go on," came the voice from behind the screen. Kagome was a bit surprised at the rough quality of it.

Miroku bowed quickly and continued.

"I was, regrettably, unable to discover the exact source of the disturbances. However, I was able to discover the village that had survived the attacks and the reason it was saved, which I believe to be related to the unrest."

He made a sweeping gesture in Kagome's direction. She fought not to flinch as all eyes turned to her, the chattering in the crowd resuming to a lesser degree. It felt as if all of the blood in her body had rushed up to heat her face.

"Kagome," came the voice again from behind the screen.

Miroku's brow furrowed in consternation and Kagome felt her own do the same. No one had mentioned her name yet.

"Ah…The Council told Us," the Tennō said quickly.

The noblewoman on his right turned a vaguely puzzled look on him, the first real hint of expression Kagome had seen on her face since the beginning of the ceremony. At least it confirmed that she was not merely some odd, life-sized porcelain doll.

"Yes, of course," Miroku said, though he did not seem wholly satisfied with the answer.

Kagome heard the name of the Tennō enter the chatter surrounding her, followed by a few tittering laughs. She frowned, wondering at this.

"Continue with your explanation, Houshi," the Tennō ordered. Miroku bowed again.

"Of course, your Majesty," Miroku said. "As I was saying, Kagome-san was the source of the village's salvation. Using her spiritual abilities, she was able to erect a barrier large and strong enough to ward off any youkai attacks. Thus her village was saved.”

“Unfortunately, Kagome-san is relatively untrained in the spiritual arts, and I believe it may have been her powerful and distinct aura that was attracting youkai to the area in the first place."

Kagome winced, having forgotten that detail in the midst of everything else. A rippling gasp spread out through the crowd. Fans and mouths went crazy, chattering and flapping in mad chaos.

"Shut up!" yelled a voice, and Kagome was shocked to realize it was the Tennō's. His manner of speaking was no better than many of the rougher men of her village.

"We are sure that the court is wondering why you brought the wen-….woman here when you think she's the one who caused that disaster," his Majesty continued, and Kagome wondered yet again at his slip. 

This was the man that was supposed to be descended from the sun kami herself?

"As I mentioned earlier, your Majesty, I believe Kagome-san to be in possession of potentially unrivaled spiritual abilities. That being the case, I thought the best option would be to bring her here to be properly trained in the use and control of them," Miroku explained.

"In this way the disturbances on the southern edge cease and your Majesty gains a powerful spiritualist to employ at his discretion. I believe she will prove particularly useful in the times such as we find ourselves, your Majesty."

"You know how unorthodox it would be to accept someone of common birth into the court?" the Tennō asked.

"I am aware, your Majesty. However, I believe Kagome-san to be fully capable of adapting to any situation, and I do not believe her birth status will hinder her in any way," Miroku declared with conviction.

The room fell silent once more, everyone waiting on the Tennō's decision. Miroku turned partially to Kagome, offering a small smile. Kagome managed to smile back, grateful for the faith he had shown in her. She braced herself to learn her fate, turning her gaze expectantly up to the silk screen. Her hands trembled slightly where they were clasped in her lap.

"Houshi, We have considered your opinion," the Tennō spoke at last. Kagome sucked in a breath.

"And We say that the miko Kagome will be allowed to stay, on the condition that she completes all court training successfully."

The room burst into motion once more and Kagome heard several cries of protest go up. She turned with wide eyes to Miroku who was beaming at her amidst the clamor. An echoing grin stretched across her face. Distantly she thought she could hear Sango cheering.

"Silence."

A voice rang out above the clamor. Eyes turned to the source and fans slowed gradually.

It was the woman on the right side of the dais, and she did not look pleased.

"Though I do not to presume to contradict the Tennō-sama's word, which we all of us know to be law, I feel it is my duty as future Empress to speak my piece," she said, her voice ringing clear and crisp like a bell.

"My Lord and Majesty, I do not believe it proper to allow a commoner into the court, however questionably gifted she might be. If the kami did not see fit to give her noble status from birth, then she is no more meant to be among us than any other commoner."

Many of the courtiers erupted into cheers and applause.

How in the world was that not contradictory, Kagome wondered. The future Empress' eyes met the miko's for a brief moment, but there was none of the dislike or upset that Kagome had expected to see in the other woman's deep brown eyes. They remained vaguely detached.

"Kikyou, We understand what you mean, but it isn't your place to make those decisions," the Tennō spoke up.

"It is simply not proper, my Lord," the woman, Kikyou, persisted dispassionately. “We have nothing save the Houshi’s word that she possesses any spiritual gifts worth noting, and even should she they would have to be quite considerable to even entertain the notion of bringing her into the court.”

"What will change your mind, then?" the Tennō asked, seeming to relent slightly.

Kagome frowned, wondering why someone with absolute authority would allow himself to be led in that manner.

Kikyou considered his words for a moment.

"There is a nest of youkai near my clan's lands in the east that has been proving particularly troublesome. If this girl were to go there and dispose of the entire nest, with only the spiritual knowledge that she has now and no court training to aid her, then I would change my opinion and say she was truly among the ones gifted by the kami."

"Kikyou…"said the Tennō incredulously.

"With all due respect to her future Majesty and your Majesty," Miroku interrupted, rising to stand. "I believe this test to be unreasonable. Such an errand would be a death sentence to almost any spiritualist-"

"Then she obviously was not meant to be here, Houshi-sama," Kikyou cut in. "Return her to her village."

Her gaze met Kagome's again, the future Empress' eyes unconcerned with the miko's fate. Anger rose like bile in Kagome's throat.

"I will do it," she declared loudly.

Miroku whipped around to look at her, his expression one of horror.

"Kagome-chan-"

She shook her head and rose to her feet, her eyes never leaving Kikyou's. The future Empress looked somewhat surprised, one delicate eyebrow arching.

"Do not presume to think I will feel bad if you should perish in the effort," Kikyou said coolly.

"I do not. After all, if I die then it must be what the kami willed for me," Kagome returned.

"As you wish. You will depart in a week. Be ready."

Amidst the cheers and flapping, bright fans of courtiers, Kagome’s fate was thus sealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, that was a long chapter. It felt long when I was writing it, anyway. I'm sorry to subject you all to my horrible architecture descriptions, but I'm a firm believer in establishing the setting and so all I can say is that I tried my best.
> 
> Also, just a note, but I flubbed some historical details in this chapter. I did it on purpose and I apologize to any history buffs out there that were hoping for a more faithful portrayal of the Heian period. The main points I altered for the purpose of moving the story forward are:
> 
> 1) Bathing habits in the Heian period- while there probably were some sort if bathing houses in the capital, the ritual bathing that is popular today in Japan hadn't taken off by the Heian period. In other words, they didn't bathe much. But I found it easier to stick to a cleansing ritual more similar to modern day Japan because I am more familiar with it, and I needed to utilize it in my plot.
> 
> 2) Women and their status-though the Heian period was a period that valued women highly (it was one of the few periods in Japanese history where a girl baby was prized over a boy), women still led lives of relative seclusion.
> 
> Only their husbands were allowed to see their faces (the rest of the time when they had to meet with men they did it through a screen) and they weren't physically very active. Also, the Heian ideal beauty was pale, had small eyes, had blacked all of her teeth out (so her mouth looked empty when she smiled-they thought teeth were icky for some reason), had very long dark hair, and had shaved her eyebrows and repainted them as straight lines about an inch above where was natural.
> 
> Obviously I did not adhere to most of this, because I neither wanted to write a story where Kagome and Sango sat around brushing their hair all day or a story where their appearances were so drastically altered by no teeth and eyebrows that they sounded unrecognizable.
> 
> Also, as to Sango and Miroku's last names, Miroku's I got from the name of the sect of Buddhism most popular during the Heian period. Sango's last name is the actual name of one of four clans that were particularly powerful during the Heian period. Kagome, on the other hand, notably lacks a surname despite having one in canon because during the Heian period only those of the ruling class would have had a surname to claim. Thus she remains simply Kagome for our narrative purposes.
> 
> For those of you that caught it and thought 'what the heck?', I purposely had the Tennō referring to himself in the plural in the last scene. I was trying to be authentic, as Japanese emperors usually refer to themselves with the word 'yo', which translates in the plural. I'm not entirely clear on the reasons behind this, but it has something to do with the Emperor being sort of the 'house' in which the gods can reside (I think).
> 
> If you have any other questions that I failed to address here, feel free to let me know!


	4. Of Massacres and Mates

The court meeting had been called to an immediate end after Kagome's assignment was given. Miroku had executed a hasty bow before grabbing her arm, nearly dragging her out of the building before any of the courtiers had even gotten to their feet. His expression was drawn tight with agitation.

Sango was waiting for the two outside, having managed to slip out in the midst of all the commotion. Kagome might have found it amusing how closely her expression matched Miroku’s if the both of them combined had not been so fearsome.

As soon as they were far away enough to not be overheard, Sango started in fiercely on her. Miroku aided her with small, sharp commentary here and there.

They pointed out every possible danger of the mission, every flaw in her logic for accepting, and detailed every possible scenario that might end in her gruesome and painful death. Kagome was certain that it was only their extensive training in manners that kept them from degenerating into yelling at her.

By the time the three reached the Tachibana residence they both seemed to have worn themselves out, their admonitions slowing to small comments every now and again. Kagome continued to nod contritely, quietly asking a passing servant to have tea sent to the main dining hall.

Once seated at the long table Miroku and Sango lapsed into stony silence. The tea arrived promptly, and Kagome waited until the two had had a few calming sips before venturing to speak.

"Sango-sama. Miroku-sama. I know you both are not very pleased with what I did-"

Sango snorted, interrupting her. Kagome blinked, astonished at the unladylike gesture.

"Of course we are not pleased," affirmed Miroku, not bothered in the least by Sango's slip in etiquette.

"Well, yes, you have both made that very clear," Kagome tried again. "But…is there any chance that you could bring yourselves to see _why_ I did it?"

"You allowed the future Empress to rile you," Sango said.

"I did not-"

"The Tennō-sama had already decided that you could remain in the court," Miroku interrupted yet again.

"The Tennō-sama backed down as soon as the future Empress began to disagree," Kagome argued, growing slightly irritated. "If I had not done anything she would have sent me home and the Tennō-sama would not have done anything about it. Everything the both of you have done for me would have been meaningless then!"

"It will be far more meaningless if you die!" Sango snapped, slapping her palm down on the table. The teacups rattled. Kagome flinched.

"Now, now. We are all feeling a bit frustrated. Let's try to calm down and speak rationally," Miroku said wearily, pressing a hand to his temple.

Sango frowned at him, but nodded reluctantly. Kagome gazed at him expectantly, hoping he might be able to reason Sango out of her ill humor.

"Alright, then," he continued. "Kagome-chan, I think I can reasonably speak for both myself and Sango-sama when I say that we are feeling more than a little helpless. Now that you have agreed to this mission there is nothing we can do for you, you see.”

“You have given your word to the future Empress before the entire court. There is no way to revoke that without serious consequences. Thus there are only three ways in which all of this can end. You will be victorious and return for training, you will fail and be sent home, or you will…perish."

Sango nodded in grimly in agreement.

"As much as we might want to help, you took it out of our hands, Kagome-chan."

Kagome frowned, her gaze dropping to the mug of tea clasped in her hands.

"I am sorry. I did not mean to distress either of you. But…well, with all due respect, Miroku-sama, why did you bring me here if you did not believe I was capable of doing something like this?" she said softly.

"It's not that I do not believe you capable, Kagome-chan," Miroku sighed, shaking his head. "But I wanted you to have training and…well, I thought things would turn out much differently."

"So you don't believe that there is any chance that I will succeed?" Kagome asked, her heart sinking a little.

"Kagome-chan…" Miroku relented, seeing the crestfallen look on the her face.

"We want to go with you."

Kagome and Miroku turned to look at Sango, wearing matching expressions of surprise.

"Sango-sama..."

"But the future Empress said I had to do this alone," Kagome said.

"The future Empress said that you had to take out the nest of youkai alone," Sango pointed out. "So Houshi-sama and I will merely accompany you on the journey. We will only interfere in the extermination if it looks like it will cost you your life. Just so long as you are alive, nothing else matters."

"Sango-sama," was all Kagome could manage, touched.

"The gracious Sango-sama is right," Miroku agreed, throwing the noblewoman an approving glance under which she flushed faintly pink. "As long as you still have your life, we will be able to work something out."

Kagome was quiet. She considered arguing with them. It would be asking far too much for them to take such pains on her behalf, and a close association between the three of them might hurt them in the eyes of the other courtiers. Both, however, looked firm in their resolve.

"Alright, then. Thank you both so very, very much," Kagome said, smiling softly. "Just know that I intend to win, no matter what."

Both of them smiled in return.

"Of course, Kagome-chan."

* * *

Once the three of them had reached an understanding, Miroku and Sango wasted no time in getting to work. Together they managed to set up a series of tests to determine the strengths and weaknesses in Kagome’s spiritual abilities.

Of course they could not teach her anything new, as the future Empress had dictated that she must go in with only her current knowledge. That, however, did not prevent them from helping her to refine what skills she did have.

She found it amusing how well Sango and Miroku managed to work together when they were not at odds with one another. She was grateful their efforts, as well, considering that she had had no plan whatsoever behind her acceptance of the future Empress's challenge. Truthfully she had allowed herself to be provoked in some ways.

But Kagome also knew that this challenge might be the only way that the courtiers would ever begin to accept her. She had seen how firmly set against her most of them were, even when the Tennō himself had approved of her staying.

If she could accomplish such a feat as this, though, it would force them to at least allow her to live in relative peace in their midst. Or so Kagome hoped, anyway.

Through the tests they managed to find that her strengths were in her ability to heal and skill with the bow. Unfortunately her healing skills would be useless in this task, as Kagome was incapable of healing her own woulds.

The bow and arrows, however, were an advantage. They allowed her to do damage from a distance, keeping her out of the range of physical blows.

Unfortunately there was also quite a downside to archery. The amount of spiritual energy she could pack into a single arrows was severely limited, and after taking down a few youkai she would surely be discovered by the others and mobbed. Kagome alone would be unable to fire off enough arrows to defend against such a multi-pronged attack.

If she could create a barrier for protection while firing the problem would be solved. Sadly Kagome was horrendous when it came to erecting barriers. The barrier that had saved her village had been made of her power, but had essentially been formed by Kaede. Thus the barrier strategy was a moot point.

The three had seemed to reach an impasse for a time after coming to these conclusions. Healing was useless, an attack with arrows alone was improbable at best, and Kagome could not be taught how to create a barrier strong enough to keep youkai out. Two days passed in a stagnant, frustrating manner.

Sango saved them all with a small epiphany.

She caught Kagome in the garden near the koi pond one day, meditating in order to keep from drowning in her anxieties. It took Sango a great deal of searching, walking past the koi pond repeatedly, before she was actually able to spot Kagome who had been sitting there all along in such relaxed state that she had been unnoticeable.

They had never bothered to test Kagome in her meditation skills as none of them had figured them relevant, but quite the opposite proved to be true.

Sango suggested after her discovery that Kagome try an ambush. It would require her getting dangerously close to the heart of the nest, but if she could manage to fire off a few arrows and then quickly slip into a meditative state it might work. It would probably call for a few repetitions of the process and unfailing nerves, but it was not impossible.

For the remaining four days she had before she had to set out, Kagome put every ounce of energy she had into practicing both her meditation and her aim with the bow.

Miroku set up a series of archery targets in Sango's garden, even going so far as to play moving target himself a few times.

Sango did her part by making meditation as difficult as possible for Kagome, tossing her Hiraikotsu near the miko and making a general clamor while the younger girl attempted to concentrate.

Slowly and painstakingly Kagome learned to tune out all distractions and simply slip into non-being.

A few times at night Kagome found herself drawn again to the aura of the Goshinboku. Weary from training but too anxious to sleep, she would creep out and lay in the roots of the tree to draw on its comforting energy. Vaguely she realized that some part of her was hoping for the coarse man to appear again. He never did.

Once, though, just as Kagome was beginning to slip into unconsciousness in the cradle of the twisting roots, she could have sworn she sensed some sort of odd aura hovering above her in the high branches. With a jolt she had jumped up, scanning the dark. A severely sleep deprived mind had her imagining she saw a flash of gold and red, but she could find nothing there upon closer inspection.

* * *

The morning of the day before departure found Kagome and Sango packing. It proved to be a bit more difficult than either had anticipated.

Sango, despite being a profoundly sensible woman in many respects, was still a courtier and used to traveling in some style. It took no small amount of persuading on Kagome's part to convince the older woman that three full trunks was most certainly not packing light.

Miroku walked in on them in the midst of this, some sort of scroll in hand. He was frowning, looking vaguely perplexed.

"Is something the matter, Houshi-sama?" asked Sango, putting down the set of hair combs that she had been trying to convince Kagome was essential to their trip.

"Not wrong, I suppose. Just…suspicious," Miroku answered, holding up the scroll.

Sango took it from him and unrolled it. Kagome came to stand behind her, reading over her shoulder.

"What is it?" Kagome asked after a moment of scanning the paper.

She could make out parts of it, but the majority was worded with such stiff formality that it was almost incomprehensible to her.

"The Tennō-sama has decreed that his Majesty will be sending guards to accompany us on the trip," said Sango, frowning as she read through the document a second time.

"Three guards," added Miroku. "Though not for the purpose of aiding us in any way. Rather they are going to monitor us to make certain that everything is done correctly."

"Is that odd?" asked Kagome, not seeing anything terribly strange about it.

"It is unusual that the Tennō-sama would dispatch imperial troops on a mission that is neither official nor a matter of state," Sango explained. "The Tennō-sama could just have Fujiwara troops watch over us if his Majesty is so concerned with us doing things correctly."

"Fujiwara troops?" Kagome echoed.

"Ah, I think we forget that you are unfamiliar with the workings of the court. You have been acclimating yourself to the life and manners quite beautifully, Kagome-chan," Miroku said. Kagome smiled her thanks and waited for him to continue.

"Fujiwara is the clan that the future Empress Kikyou-sama belongs to. They once dominated court life entirely, though their power has…diminished in recent years. But as almost all clans do, they keep their own troops on their lands in case battle is ever necessary. And Sango-sama is quite right, it would be much more sensible for the Tennō-sama to employ them in our guardianship."

"So one can only surmise that his Majesty has taken some sort of special interest in Kagome-chan's situation," Sango said thoughtfully.

They all considered this, drawing out the implications. Kagome was slightly worried, wondering if this kind of attention was something she should want.

Slowly she and Sango resumed packing, the taiji-ya much less argumentative. Miroku helped for a while, making occasional remarks on Sango's many virtues, before he drifted off to make preparations of his own.

The remainder of the day passed in a relatively uneventful manner, but Kagome's sleep that night was a restless one filled with tossing and turning. She had vague dreams of blood and wolves and human birds. A sense of disquiet began to grow in Kagome that would follow her all the next day.

* * *

The three were dressed and ready to set out with the rising of the sun the following morning, all of them anxious to be off.

They met up at the eastern entrance of the Suzakumon gate. Miroku ordered a guard there to have three horses readied and saddled with their bags.

"Where are the guards that the Tennō-sama is sending?" asked Kagome as they waited for the guard to return with their horses. There was no one else to be seen besides a few other gate guards.

"I was instructed to simply wait here until they arrive," Miroku replied.

"They did not specify a time?" asked Sango, adjusting a few of the armored plates on her sleek, black taiji-ya uniform. She had opted to wear it rather than a juni-hito, as the rich silks of that luxurious garment seldom proved comfortable on long rides.

Miroku shook his head in the negative. Sango huffed out a small sigh.

"That's troublesome. Hopefully they will not take too long. I want to be off as soon as possible."

Silently Kagome agreed with her friend. Her nerves were fluttering in her stomach like the wings of a small bird.

Shortly the guard arrived with three large, brown horses, each saddled with a few bags. Kagome went over to hers, a big gentle mare, and began to pet it, cooing to it in the silly voice that people tend to lapse in to when speaking to animals.

She fed it the last few pieces of apple left over from her breakfast, wrapped in a little cloth and tucked into the front of her robes. As it chomped them down she continued to talk to it, mostly to distract herself, asking the horse to be careful with her as she was still inexperienced in riding on her own.

Time dragged on slowly as they waited for the guards to arrive, Miroku joining Kagome with the horses as Sango paced about in her agitation. Eventually the three caught the sounds of hooves clattering on the stone walkway, the noise drifting towards them on the chill morning breeze. Three large black horses and their riders came slowly into view.

Miroku and Sango both executed deep bows, Kagome following their example quickly. As they straightened up, the three guards dismounted. Kagome had to bite back an exclamation.

Two of the guards were human and largely unremarkable to her, but the third’s features were strikingly familiar. She stared at him, examining the man from head to toe. But 'man' was not wholly accurate.

The general shape of his features was hard-edged and very similar to the coarse man she had met beneath the Goshinboku, but Kagome was certain that he had been human.

The being before her was most definitely not. Gold slit-pupiled eyes, long silver hair, elongated claws on both hands and bare feet, and a pair of triangular dog ears atop his head set him drastically apart from any human.

Kagome could have pegged him as a youkai with her eyes closed. His aura positively reeked of youki. But something was slightly off about it, though she could not pinpoint what it was.

All of the similarities between the man in front of her and the man beneath the Goshinboku left her to wonder if the two were related somehow. But a human and a youkai related? Was it possible? Kagome thought it would definitely be too forward of her to voice any of this, so she kept quiet.

"Good morning! You are the guards that the Tennō-sama instructed to accompany us?" Miroku said.

The youkai, seemingly the head guard, grunted an assent.

"Well, it is a pleasure to meet all of you. I am Shingon Miroku, a houshi-"

"We-I... _I_ already know who you are, houshi. No need to go through all that introduction crap. Let's just get going," the youkai cut him off roughly.

Kagome was astonished. He spoke just like the coarse man, too.

Miroku looked mildly affronted for a moment, but covered it over with an easy grin.

"Ah, how silly of me. Of course the Tennō-sama would have explained the situation to you. However, his Majesty neglected to inform us of your names."

"Ah. Yeah. I’m...Genji," the youkai said shortly, by way of introduction.

"Genji-sama?" Sango echoed incredulously, obviously fishing for a clan surname.

"Genji is fine," the youkai rebuffed her.

"Zetsubode Hidetaka," said the taller of the two human guards, giving his own name and breaking the awkward silence that followed Genji’s words.

"Uragiri Hideyoshi," offered the other guard.

Sango and Miroku bowed again, but the slight degree of their bow told Kagome that the clans of the guards were minor ones. She mirrored their actions.

"Let's get going already," groused the youkai, moving to mount his horse.

A slight, steady clacking had them all turning to look back down the stone path. Astonishingly it was the future Empress gliding swiftly down the path, her wooden geta causing the noise beneath the hem of her deep red juni-hito. Her face was impassive as ever, but Kagome could sense a certain agitation about her.

"I am afraid that I have thought it over, and I cannot condone such foolhardy and nonsensical conduct, my Lor-" Kikyou began upon reaching the group. Oddly enough, she seemed to be addressing Genji.

"Whether you approve it or not, _Fujiwara-sama_ , this is what the Tennō-sama decreed," Genji cut her off firmly, his expression warning.

Kikyou looked vaguely puzzled for a moment, but seemed to comprehend something as she looked from Miroku to Sango to Kagome. Still she persisted in arguing.

"Even so, I believe leaving the capital like this to be a terrible mistake. There is no reason for you to accompany them. Rather you are needed here to keep order-"

"No more, Fujiwara-sama. The Tennō-sama has taken care of everything. We- _I'm_ going," Genji declared, mounting up. The other two guards followed his lead.

Kagome, Sango, and Miroku remained standing, looking uncertainly at the future Empress as she clutched the trailing fabric of her own sleeves.

"Mount up. We're leaving," ordered Genji, looking purposefully away from Kikyou.

Slowly the three did as commanded, Kagome receiving a help from the Miroku. The guards pulled open the large wooden gates.

"As you will. I will do my duty as future Empress and keep order myself," Kikyou declared. She spun around and headed purposefully back down the path, casting only one lingering glance back at Genji.

"Move out," ordered the youkai, kneeing his horse into a trot after glancing quickly back at Kikyou's retreating form.

He shook his head a bit as if to clear it, and his gaze slid over to consider Kagome as she adjusted herself in her saddle behind him. Kagome's eyes turned up to meet his own by chance, and the youkai turned hastily away.

The rest of the group also spurred their horses into motion. They rode out of the gate and on for a silent stretch of time.

Questions buzzed silently around Sango, Miroku, and Kagome. The other two guards somehow seemed to understand what had gone on between Genji and the future Empress. Every now and again the three cast questioning looks at one another, but Miroku was the first to work up the nerve to ask.

He pulled his horse up beside Genji’s, offering him a small smile. The youkai did not spare him so much as a glance. Miroku cleared his throat, but still Genji ignored him.

"Ah, Genji-sama?" Miroku ventured.

"What?" Genji responded flatly.

"May I inquire as to the relation between yourself and the future Empress?" Miroku said.

"No."

"What?"

"No, you can't inquire. It's none of your business. All you have to worry about is riding until I say we can stop for the night," Genji snapped.

"Ah…alright, then," Miroku submitted, falling back to ride between Kagome and Sango. The three exchanged a look, but no one dared push any furrther. They were left with only their suspicions and guesses.

* * *

The rest of the ride that day passed slowly and without event. Miroku, Sango, and Kagome chatted amongst themselves, reviewing the plan for when they arrived at the youkai nest. The two human guards joined in the conversation a few times, giving their own input. Genji, on the other hand, rode ahead of the group the entire time, avoiding talking to anyone.

At sunset the youkai picked out a small clearing in the forest they were riding through, ordering them to stop there for the night. He informed them that it would probably take another day and a half or so to reach Fujiwara lands.

Sango, Miroku and the two human guards went to work setting up camp. Kagome volunteered to go collect fire wood, slinging her bow and arrows over one shoulder before venturing deeper into the woods.

She was glad to be on her own for a while, clearing her mind and then refilling it with the hum of the nature all around her. She wandered aimlessly, picking up fallen branches here and there. She shivered as a cool wind kicked up, her teeth chattering slightly. Winter was upon them now and the temperature was sinking with the sun.

Kagome was stopped by the sound of splashing. She could sense a river running through the forest, but the noise seemed too loud to be just the trickle of water over rocks. Kagome cautiously wove her way through the trees towards the source.

It was Genji there, sashinuki and karaginu rolled up as he waded around in the river water. A small pile of fish sat on the bank behind him and as she approached his hand jabbed sharply into the flowing water. When he pulled it back out there was a fish speared on the end of his elongated claws.

Kagome hesitated, wondering if she should interrupt. Goodness knew she would probably only get snapped at if she did announce her presence. She turned to walk away. A twig snapped loudly beneath her foot and she froze.

The youkai whipped around, golden eyes scanning the surrounding trees.

Guiltily Kagome crept forward.

"Oh. You," Genji said flatly, his expression relaxing back into the scowl he had worn all day.

He stared expectantly at her. Kagome fidgeted.

"So what the in the seven hells are you doing out here?" Genji snapped at length, impatient.

"Ah…" Kagome said, holding up the bundle of sticks in her arms. "I was just collecting fire wood. I did not mean to interrupt you. I will go back to camp now. "

Kagome bowed hastily and turned to leave, flustered. But darkness had fallen in earnest now and she hesitated, unsure of which way she had come from.

"Oi, woman."

Kagome turned back, both slightly irritated at the address and struck once again by how similar he was to the coarse man beneath the Goshinboku.

"Yes, Genji-sama?" she managed with strained politeness.

He returned his focus to fishing, not bothering to face her as he said, "You don't look too bright to me, so I'd suggest you just wait till I'm done. Then you can follow me back to the camp so you don't get yourself lost and eaten by some wild animal."

Kagome felt a slight tick develop above her left eye at the casual insult.

"No, thank you, Genji-sama. I can find my way back just fine all on my own." Kagome sounded considerably less polite this time.

She turned again to leave, ready to storm off in a huff. The surrounding trees were all blanketed in a thick darkness. She could barely see in front of her.

Kagome glanced between the dark, looming woods and Genji, wondering which was the lesser of the two evils. With a sigh she decided that a little embarrassment and degradation was preferable to death at the fangs of some nocturnal beast.

She sat down quietly on the bank, not saying a word. Genji glanced at her from the corner of his eye, smirking. Kagome scowled at his back.

"Guess you're not as dumb as I thought."

"I suppose not," Kagome bit out.

He speared two fish simultaneously, tossing them back onto the bank amongst the small pile he had already caught.

There was some splashing as he sloshed out of the river and onto the bank. He shook himself like a dog, water droplets flying everywhere.

"Hey!" squeaked Kagome as a few droplets splashed onto her face.

He ignored her, unrolling his sashinuki and karaginu.

"You could apologize," Kagome muttered under her breath.

"I could do alotta things," Genji returned.

Kagome glanced at him, surprised. Those ears were not just for show.

He gathered up the fish that he had caught, bundling them up into the cloth he had laid out beneath them and starting off into the woods without a word. Kagome scowled and jumped up with her bundle of sticks, rushing after him into the dark.

Silence stretched thickly between the two. Kagome soon grew uncomfortable, though he seemed unaffected. He barely even seemed to be aware of her presence.

"You can see where we are going in the dark like this?" Kagome said, to fill the silence.

A grunt was her answer. She took it as a yes.

"That must be useful."

Genji shot her a sideways glance.

"If you're just yapping to hear the sound of your own voice, feel free to shut up."

Kagome only just barely managed to keep herself from dropping her bundle of sticks to hit the man. Her hands flexed almost spasmodically. In the end, no matter how crude, he was a nobleman of some great status. He did not strike her as the type to be forgiving if she stepped out of her place.

"Then how about I ask a question that I actually need an answer to?" Kagome offered sharply.

"Just because you ask doesn't mean I have to answer."

"I know," Kagome said, taking that as permission of a sort. "So you can answer me or not when I ask why exactly the Tennō-sama thought it necessary to send his Majesty's own guards along on this mission."

Genji froze in his tracks, turning to face her fully for the first time. His golden eyes were bright in the darkness as he stared hard at her, searching her face for something. Kagome stared back, uncertain. At length he turned away.

"The Tennō-sama…didn't feel the need to explain to us," Genji said slowly.

"Oh…"

Kagome was hardly satisfied with the answer, but saw no point in pursuing it further. They resumed their walk.

"So what in the seven levels of hell made you agree to do this?"

Kagome jumped a bit, surprised at the sound of his voice. She had not expected him to make anything vaguely resembling an attempt at conversation. He certainly did not look very interested in her answer. That, however, might just have been his face. It seemed to be stuck that way.

"The mission, you mean?"

"Yeah."

"I did not want to be thrown out of the court before I even got a chance, I suppose," Kagome replied thoughtfully.

"And if you die? Is some fancy life in court with nice clothes and food really worth your life?"

"I do not particularly want to be in court to have a 'fancy life' or anything," Kagome answered, considering this. "I mean, it will be nice to live without having to worry about surviving. But really…there are going to be so many things that I will be able to _do_ if I can be trained in the court. I can help people like the ones in my village. I can finally do something other than feel bad about all the things that I could not do."

"...that’s your reason for coming to court?" he said, disbelief clear in his face as he eyed her.

"Is that so strange?" Kagome said defensively.

"Yeah. It's really strange," he said, though without any real edge to the words. Rather his expression had grown thoughtful, his eyes shuttering as he turned them back to the path before them. 

"I suppose I will have to beg your pardon then, Genji-sama," Kagome huffed, nettled by this casual dismissal.

"Nothing for me to pardon," he said. He glanced at her, shaking his head.

Kagome frowned, deciding that perhaps it would be best to simply ignore him from here on out.

They reached the camp and Genji stopped short on the fringe of it. Kagome looked at him for a moment before moving to walk past.

"Oi, wench."

Kagome turned back to him.

"Pick your fish."

He held out the bundle to her.

Kagome blinked at him, feeling that this might be some odd peace offering. He looked less surly, anyway.

She picked a fish.

* * *

They all ate before going to sleep. Kagome noticed when Genji crept out beyond the fringe of the camp to sleep. He seemed to prefer being away from the group as much as possible. She wondered at the odd tendency.

Kagome awoke in the middle of the night, finding she needed to relieve herself. She extricated herself from her futon near the fire, careful not to rouse Sango where she slept nearby.

She crept lightly around the edge of the camp, looking for a large bush or some other sort of covering that might offer privacy. She found one and promptly froze.

There were voices coming from the other side.

Kagome crouched down and listened carefully. A few moments of listening told her it was the two human guards. But what were they doing up at that hour?

"So we're agreed, then?" whispered one guard. "We'll do it when we reach the Fujiwara lands?"

"Yeah," replied the other guard. "Then it can be dismissed as the Fujiwara stirring up trouble. They're in a position to do it, and they certainly have motive. It'll be perfect."

"It has to be done," said the other guard. "I mean, a hanyou? It's ridiculous. It can't be tolerated."

"Yeah," agreed the other guard.

The two fell silent for a stretch. Kagome took the opportunity to creep away unnoticed. She went and tended to her business in the woods before returning to her futon.

She lay awake for a time, wondering what the guards had been talking about. It had sounded suspicious at the very least.

She wondered if she should inform Sango and Miroku of what she had overheard. Quick on the heels of that thought was the question of whether or not Genji was involved in the seeming plot. He had been sent with the two, after all.

Kagome decided it would be best to say nothing until she understood more. There was no need to cast unnecessary doubt on Genji if he were not involved. She did not know for certain that what the guards were doing was bad, either. She resolved to watch over the two on her own for a while.

* * *

The group rose early the next morning and ate before cleaning up the camp. They mounted up and continued their journey east.

That day's ride was unremarkable, with only an occasional attempt at groping from Miroku toward Sango and a few barked orders from Genji.

Kagome spent the day watching the two human guards, though with little in the way of answers or results. The only thing she really learned was that Genji generally avoided too much involvement with the two humans, though they seemed keep a rather keen eye on him.

At night they settled in a forest clearing again for the night. Genji went off to fish and Kagome followed after him, not quite certain of her own motive.

Surprisingly he tolerated her presence on the bank as he fished. He did not speak to her or do anything to overtly acknowledge her presence, but he did not order her to go away, either.

They ate, slept, and set out again the next morning for the final leg of their journey. In the late afternoon Genji informed them that they were only a short ways away. He told Kagome that they could either continue straight on to the nest or stop for a time at the Fujiwara residence to rest.

Kagome opted to head straight for the nest. She did not feel entirely prepared, but more than anything she wanted to get it all over with.

They rode on towards the nest.

* * *

As they drew closer to the nest Kagome began to feel faintly ill. The aura of the youkai was large and filled with a good amount of malice. The sheer force of it told Kagome that the number of youkai in the nest might be somewhere up in the fifties. She shuddered slightly.

"You sure you wanna do this? Whatever your intentions might be, this is all still looking pretty idiotic to me."

Kagome jumped, torn abruptly from her darker thoughts. She had not noticed Genji dropping back to ride beside her.

"I…I'm not backing down," Kagome said with more certainty than she felt.

"You're scared shitless," said Genji bluntly.

Kagome frowned at him. 

"I am scared. But that doesn't have to stop me. Sometimes you just have to be scared and do it anyway, right?"

Genji took a long look at her, seeming to consider this. He shook his head.

"Keh. Idiot."

"Maybe I am," Kagome murmured, more to herself than to him.

"Oi, woman."

"Yes?"

"If you…if you need any help or if you get in trouble…"

He trailed off, looking distinctly uncomfortable. Kagome smiled faintly.

"I know. All I have to do is call and Miroku-sama and Sango-sama will come to help me."

Genji shot her an incredulous look.

"By the kami, you really are an idiot," he snapped, spurring his horse to ride ahead of her again.

"Huh?"

"We are here," called Miroku from the front of the group.

Kagome nudged her horse up to where he, Sango, and the two human guards had stopped. Genji was apart from the group and off to the side, fuming over something or other.

"This is the edge of their territory," Miroku clarified. "Their aura solidifies and permeates this area. My guess is that the nest is somewhere up in the cliff side there."

Miroku pointed to a relatively small, sharply sheared cliff face looming a short way off in the distance.

"I guess that's where I am headed, then," Kagome said, nudging her horse forward.

"Kagome-chan, wait. We need to-" Sango said, reaching out a hand as if to restrain her.

"It's best that you all stay here," Kagome called back, kneeing her horse into quick trot. "If I get in trouble I'll head straight back here for help."

"Kagome-chan, I do not believe that to be wise. What if-" Miroku tried to argue.

"Please just stay here, all of you," Kagome called back, cutting him off. "If you're with me I'm afraid you'll be too tempted to jump in unnecessarily. Don't worry, I'll be fine. Just…believe in me a little bit!"

"Oi, woman!"

"I'll be back in a little while! Wait there for me!"

Kagome spurred her horse into a gallop, ignoring their calls. Thankfully they seemed to reluctantly respect her wishes, as no one came after her. She secured the quiver and bow on her shoulder as she rode, comforted by their weight on her back.

After galloping for a distance, Kagome stopped her horse in a thick clump of trees. She dismounted, taking the horse's reins and looping them loosely around a tree trunk.

In the cover of the trees the horse would not become a target for the youkai and could run if anything happened to come after it. She cooed to it for a few moments, thanking it for taking her all that way and assuring it she would definitely be back.

Ever so slowly and cautiously, Kagome crept around the edges of the trees. She was careful to keep just inside the shadows. She was very near to the cliff now.

She edged her way along the cliff face, looking for a path to climb up and taking great pains to remain calm enough to suppress her aura. She found a precarious little ledge trail and began her climb.

Kagome had to cling to the cliff side to keep her balance on the narrow ledge, grasping at whatever protruding stones she could get her hands on. The climb was slow and tedious, but she was very careful to quiet her nerves enough to keep from being detected.

Finally Kagome found what she had been hoping for. It was a small ledge, just big enough for Kagome to sit down on. Below it she could see a large, dark opening that, judging from the feel of its aura, led into the youkai nest.

Kagome sat down on the ledge, resting her back against the cliff face and bringing her quiver of arrows into her lap for easier access. Notching one arrow, she slipped into the deepest meditative peace that she could manage, pulling the solid essence of the cliff face in through her back as she rested against it.

Her eyes remained open, watching and waiting. It was high noon and Kagome had not yet seen any of the youkai emerge. Most likely they had gone out to hunt for food. It was only a matter of time until they returned.

Her guess proved to be more than accurate. In a matter of several moments the air all around her was filled with horrendous shrieking, some garbled cross between a human scream and a hawk's cry. Round, winged bodies were swooping down out of the sky towards the nest entrance.

Kagome managed to keep her composure despite the horrible noise. Sango had made more noise when throwing Hiraikotsu, so Kagome could manage it. What she saw as the youkai drew closer, however, nearly unnerved her entirely.

The youkai were large, with spherical feathered bodies like those of some grotesquely bloated bird. Wings and taloned feet connected to this body, as well as a semblance of a human torso that protruded from atop it. The human face was monstrously distorted. But such an appearance was no more than she had expected.

What Kagome had not counted on were the meals they carried back with them from hunting. Mangled human corpses hung from their claws, intestines spilling forth and heads missing where they had been torn from shoulders. A few of the corpses seemed to be of other youkai, as well. Some kind of wolf youkai, if Kagome were to guess.

Kagome nearly lost her focus at the sight of such gore. For a moment panic spiked within her. A few of the bird youkai turned to her abruptly, spotting her for the first time. She drew a deep breath and slowed her heart forcefully, slipping back into a state of non-being.

The youkai that had spotted her now swerved in confusion at her sudden disappearance. The whole flock had arrived, numbering somewhere in the fifties at her best estimate. The group swooped and whirled about the entrance, disoriented by the confusion of their fellows.

Kagome saw her chance clearly. There were several birds lined up in her range just beneath her. It would have to be quick, but she could do it.

Kagome slipped out of meditation and the birds all turned to her immediately, shrieking. She aimed and paused for an agonizingly long moment, imbuing the arrow with her power. She fired.

Four of the youkai disintegrated, caught in the direct line of fire. Three more wailed loudly and began to drop, burned by the purification light. The rest of the horde halted for a moment, dipping and whirling wildly in their agitation and surprise.

Kagome cursed mentally. She had hoped to take down at least ten of the birds with that shot. She had not packed enough energy into her arrow in her haste to fire.

Time was of the essence and she leaned back against the cliff, imposing blankness on her mind. The youkai began to regroup.

Once again the birds had lost all traces of her, but now that they had seen her clearly they began to swarm around Kagome's perch on the ledge. A few even came close enough for their breath to fan over her skin, reeking of blood and human flesh. Only just barely did she manage to tamp down her gag reflex.

More than making her uncomfortable, however, the birds' closeness prevented her from being able to line up a good shot. The arrow would have maximum impact at such a close range, but would limit her to targeting at most two birds. The rest would be upon her so fast that she would not have time to scream.

Ever so slowly Kagome got to her feet, careful no to accidentally touch any of the youkai. They may not be able to see, sense, or smell her, but they would certainly be able feel her if she bumped them.

She edged her way along the cliff face, absorbing the cliff's steadiness through her flattened palms. Keeping a sharp eye on the flock, she made certain that none of them made any moves to follow. Slowly she managed to climb to a slightly higher, even smaller ledge.

Kagome barely had room to stand on the ledge and was concerned that it might give beneath her weight, but she could see no alternatives nearby. Besides that it was an excellent position from which to shoot down at least seven more of the youkai, still swarming around the ledge she had originally been on.

Kagome found a precarious balance, notching another arrow. She took a few moments to line up a perfect shot. Taking a deep breath, she dropped her guard and fired. The twang of the bow string was loud in her ears.

Thirteen youkai disintegrated in a flash of blue. Four more shrieked and fell. The rest of the flock erupted into a chaotic mess, shrieking and diving. Kagome gave a little jump of joy at her success.

A jump of joy that sent the fragile ledge beneath her crumbling.

Kagome screamed as she went tumbling down the cliff face, scraping against rocks and protruding edges on the way. She scrabbled wildly for a purchase amongst the rocks to halt her descent to the distant ground. Her hands bled with the effort, but she could not manage to get hold of anything solid as she rolled and twisted helplessly downward.

Two large, taloned feet saved her, but Kagome's relief was fleeting. The largest of the birds had her in its clutches.

Sore and bleeding, Kagome struggled desperately against the hold. She knew she would rather fall to her death than face whatever the bird youkai might do to her. But both her arms and legs were pinned tightly and all of her flailing was to no avail.

The bird flew through the midst of the group, squawking and showing off its prize. Kagome's heart began to hammer when as it glided down through the dark entrance to the nest. She knew very well how slim her chances of ever emerging from the lair again were.

The large bird tossed Kagome roughly down and she rolled like a rag doll, stopping only when she hit a wall. Quickly she scrambled to her feet, backing herself into a tight corner and summoning up every last bit of spiritual energy she had.

The large bird crowed its triumph loudly, the rest of the flock alighting behind him in the nest.

"Stupid little human," it sneered. "You really think that there is any chance of escape now? We will make you pay for what you did to our kinsmen."

"They deserved it for devouring all of those poor people," Kagome said, muscles tensing and hands glowing as they began to approach.

There was no question in her mind as to whether or not she could beat them and escape. She simply did not have enough spiritual training to take out so many alone.

That did not mean, however, that she was simply going to lie down and die. She thought of Souta and Mama and Jii-chan and Sango and Miroku and even Genji.

If she went out, she went out fighting.

The first bird reached her, talons arching down to slash at her. Kagome just barely managed to dodge, thrusting her glowing palm up against the bird's gut while it was still off balance. It shrieked and stumbled back against its fellows, a dark palm print burned into its stomach.

A second set of talons raked across the Kagome’s left shoulder, tearing robe and flesh. Kagome screamed and struck out blindly with another glowing fist. Somehow it made contact and the bird ducked back.

Kagome backed further into the tight corner, clutching at her bleeding shoulder. Her left arm had lost all sensation, so despite having managed to hold on to her weapons during her fall down the cliff face it seemed unlikely that she would be able to use them. She was shaking all over, tired already from the effort of summoning up her powers directly without the use of a chant or medium.

Desperately Kagome wished for her friends. They had insisted upon coming with her to prevent this exact scenario, and she had been foolish enough to force them to stay behind. Inwardly she cursed herself.

She looked up just in time to see the largest bird's talons descending upon her head. She closed her eyes in anticipation of the death blow, her mind flashing briefly to an image of the sakura trees behind Sango's residence with Sango, Miroku, Mama, Souta, and Jii-chan all sitting beneath them in the bright light of spring.

The moments stretched on and Kagome felt no pain. She cracked one eye open. Her small sliver of vision was filled with jet black and fuzzy brown. Kagome opened her eyes fully.

There was a man-no, most definitely not a 'man'. He was a youkai for certain, as his aura proudly announced to anyone capable of reading it. Dressed in an assortment of furs and dark armor plates with long, pitch black hair tied in up in a high tail, the man was broad backed and lean muscled as he held back the large bird's talons. Vaguely Kagome noticed a brown tail and connected him to the wolf youkai she had seen dangling from the claws of the birds earlier.

"Oi, woman," the youkai in front of her called, casting a glance at her over his shoulder. His face was hard-edged, his eyes the blue of a river covered in frost.

"Yes?" Kagome managed, dazed at his sudden appearance. Where had he even come from? How had he gotten in front of her so quickly?

"You're the one that piled up those nasty bird carcasses at the bottom of the cliff?" he asked, thrusting the bird whose clawed foot he had been holding away from him. The bird flew backwards, knocking away some of the others surrounding her as well.

"Yes," Kagome replied automatically, staring wonderingly at where the bird had landed.

The wolf youkai smirked.

"Then you and me've got a common goal," he said. "Think you can get up? We're not quite done yet."

The bird youkai were regrouping now, closing in on the pair once more. The wolf crouched down slightly, readying for a fight.

Slowly Kagome managed to climb to her feet, gripping the wall with her good arm for support. Her left shoulder throbbed and blood poured sluggishly from the wound, but she gritted her teeth against the pain.

"What do I need to do to?" Kagome asked.

"A fighter, huh? Not too shabby for a tiny little human," the wolf youkai said approvingly. "I can make enough room for you to do it, but you're gonna need to be able to fire those arrows of yours. Think you can?"

He dodged a taloned foot in mid-sentence, ducking beneath it before planting his fist in the bird's gut. More claws came at him from the left, but a swift, sharp extension of his left leg sent the bird stumbling away.

"I'll do it," Kagome declared firmly, her desire to live fueling her with the strength to do just about anything at that point. She wanted to live to see that scene beneath the sakura tree.

"Alright, then. Here we go."

The wolf youkai began to move his legs so rapidly that cloud of dirt arose around him, expanding to fill the entire cave. It developed quickly into a swirling mass surrounding his form. He darted forward into the group of birds, running circles around them and drawing them into the air vacuum he had created in the small cave.

Kagome lifted her bow, ignoring the screaming protests of her shoulder and the long tendrils of her own dark hair whipping manically all about her face. She planted her feet firmly to keep from being sucked in, though the wolf youkai had moved to the opposite edge of the cave to keep the pull on her from becoming too great.

She drew an arrow from her quiver and notched it, taking her time to pack in as much spiritual power as she could. She aimed at the sides of the vortex, careful to avoid the area where she estimated the wolf to be. She let the arrow fly.

Fifteen of the youkai downed in a flash or pearlescent light. The others screamed in outrage, trying in vain to escape the pull of the vortex and get at her. A few of the smarter ones swooped in towards the center of the swirling column of wind, aiming for the wolf.

Kagome quickly notched another arrow and fired, taking out the ones after going after her youkai savior. Blood loss quickly worked to numb the pain in her shoulder and she slipped into an unthinking rhythm of notch, hold, and release.

Notch, hold, release.

Notch, hold, release.

Notch, hold, release.

The cave was filled with the death cries of the birds, echoing hauntingly within the stone walls.

Kagome had already notched and fired another arrow into the dirt floor of the cave by the time she realized that all of the bird youkai were gone. The bow fell from her limp hands as the wolf youkai slowed to a stop, the windstorm slowly dissipating at his halt.

"Damn, woman!" he exclaimed, whistling low as he looked around at the ashes coating the cave floor and walls. "I didn't honestly think you could do it before dying from blood loss, let alone do that quick. By the kami, you've got some damn kinda power!"

His words fell on deaf ears as Kagome slipped down to lean against the cave wall, exhausted and trembling all over. 

It occurred to her suddenly that she had just failed in her mission by accepting the wolf's aid. Kagome began to cry quietly.

"Wh-what? Why are you crying, woman? You just took out an entire nest of human eating youkai! You won! You ain't even dead!"

He edged uncertainly toward her, at a loss at the sight of her tears.

"My name's Kagome, not 'woman'!" she sniffled. "And I didn't win. I broke the rules so now I have to go home and my village will starve!"

He stared blankly at her.

"Rules? Village?"

Kagome just nodded, not particularly answering any question. Her head was beginning to feel as if it might simply float away from her body at any moment.

"You might've lost too much blood, wom- I mean, Kagome," the youkai said, coming forward to kneel in front of the girl.

"Yeah," Kagome agreed faintly. "Do you think I'll die? I don't really want to die. Even if I failed, I still need to be there to help my village…"

"You're pretty loyal, huh?" the wolf remarked, looking contemplatively at the rapidly fading woman. "I like that. Whatta y'say I save your life?"

"Sounds good," Kagome muttered, slipping into unconsciousness at last.

The wolf youkai grinned roguishly.

"Alright, then. But it's gonna cost ya."

Without further ado he scooped the woman up carefully, dashing off with her.

* * *

Kagome was warm. Oddly warm for someone who was either dead or in the process of dying. Maybe her soul had reunited with the elements once again, as all souls did in death. Maybe she had become fire. Or perhaps she had joined with a hot spring. A hot spring would be lovely.

But if she had returned to nature, why did she still retain her own individual consciousness?

Slowly Kagome opened her eyes, discovering that she did in fact still have eyes and a body. The stone roof of a cave, lit orange by the glow of flames, slowly came into focus.

A fur blanket was what was keeping her warm, draped carefully over her form. Mindful of her injured left shoulder, she sat up.

Kagome bit down hard on her tongue to keep from crying out.

She was in a large, dark cave full of wolves, both of the animal and youkai variety. They were littered all across the floor, dozing in the warmth of the fire. There were several that were merely an arm’s length away.

Kagome's mind began working furiously to recall how she had gotten there. It was fuzzy, but she could just recall the wolf youkai she had met saying something about saving her. So then this was his clan and he was the one who had wrapped her shoulder. Taking off her karaginu and chest bindings in order to so, she realized suddenly.

She flushed a violent red, mortification welling up. How much had he seen?

The padding of feet echoed through the cave and Kagome turned towards the source, praying that it would not wake any of the wolves around her.

It was the man she had met in the bird youkai nest, emerging from some deeper part of the cave. He broke into a wide grin at the sight of her, coming to kneel down beside the nest of furs she was wrapped in.

"Finally awake, huh? You've been out cold since noon," he said. "You should be fine, though. Seems like we got it wrapped before you lost too much blood. How's it feel?"

"It's alright," Kagome answered slowly, thrown off by the familiarity with which he spoke to her. "Were you…the one who wrapped my shoulder?"

"Of course," he responded, chest puffing out with pride.

Kagome flushed again.

"You didn't…see anything, did you?" Kagome murmured.

The wolf youkai looked confused for a moment, but comprehension dawned on him and he grinned more widely than ever.

"You mean your breasts? Yeah, I saw. Nice pair, too. Don't look so embarrassed, Kagome! It's only right that as your-"

"It is not 'only right'!" snapped Kagome, so much blood rushing to her head that she thought it might burst. “There's nothing right about it! I want my karaginu back!"

"It's a little torn-"

"I want it back _now_!" Kagome demanded fiercely.

"Feisty woman, huh?" said the wolf, looking oddly pleased at this.

He rose and went back into the depths of the cave, returning with Kagome's torn and bloodied karaginu. She forced him to turn around before she slipped it back on under the cover of the fur blankets.

Fully clothed, she slipped out from beneath the furs and began making her way toward the cave's exit, picking carefully around sleeping wolves.

"Oi, Kagome! Where are you going?" the wolf called after her.

"I need to leave now. I have people that are probably worried about me. Thank you for your help, sir," Kagome said stiffly, continuing on her way.

Suddenly the wolf was at her side. Kagome jumped, surprised once more at his soundless speed.

Without so much as a word he swept her up into his arms.

"No more of that 'sir' crap. The name's Kouga, Lord of the Eastern Wolf Youkai Tribe. It's a name you won't soon be forgetting," said the wolf, carrying her out through the entrance into the night air.

They were on a long, flat ledge now, the jagged stone illuminated by the soft glow of a crescent moon. Apparently the wolf den was carved into the side of a mountain.

Kagome struggled and squirmed until Kouga set her down. She glowered at him before turning to search for some way down off the mountain.

Any climbing would probably be excruciating with her shoulder in such poor condition, but even that was preferable to further humiliation. Besides, she needed to get back to her companions as soon as possible. Surely they would be looking for her.

"Whoa, there! I only took you out here so you could get a bit of air and cool off. There ain't no way I'm letting you just leave like that. Besides, you have no clue where we are," Kouga pointed out, coming up to stand beside her.

Kagome scowled at him, but silently conceded that he was right. She had absolutely no idea where she was, or even if she was still on Fujiwara lands.

"You have to let me go back to my companions," Kagome said, a hint of pleading in her tone. "I mean, they have to be worried about me. And besides…I-I saved you, too! You said you needed my purification powers back in the bird youkai nest-my arrows!"

"You're right," Kouga allowed. "That flock of bastards has been picking off members of my tribe for months now, and hundreds more were killed trying to take them out. You could even dismember the fucking things and they would still heal. There was some kinda weird jyaki around them. Your arrows were the first thing that I ever saw that could take them out."

"So you'll take me back to my companions?" Kagome said hopefully, storing the information about the bird youkai away in the back of her mind for later examination. She had noticed something odd about their jyaki.

"Not quite," said Kouga. "You saved me once. I saved you twice. Once in the cave and twice with the bandages. You still owe me and I ain't letting you go until you've paid your debt."

"Paid my debt?" echoed Kagome, filled suddenly with trepidation.

Kouga advanced on her slowly, elongated canines glinting in the light of the moon.

"That's right. And I know just how you can do it."

"By warding your cave to keep out other youkai?" Kagome suggested desperately, not liking the look in his eyes at all.

"Not quite," Kouga said, chuckling.

"Then what would you like? Sewing? Cooking? I can do a lot of useful little things like that."

Kagome's back hit the mountain side and she realized that she had been backing away from the wolf's advances. Kouga loomed right in front of her, backlit by the moon as his eyes met hers.

"You're going to be my woman," he declared, advancing the final step to wrap his arms about her.

"What?" Kagome squeaked, her mind going blank with shock. She could not even struggle against his hold.

"You'll be my mate. With your powers and mine together, we'll dominate even beyond the eastern lands," Kouga said, clearly proud of himself for thinking up something so clever.

"Kagome!"

Kouga and Kagome turned at the unexpected sound of a new voice.

Standing on the edge opposite the pair and framed by the crescent moon was Genji, watching with wide golden eyes as Kouga and Kagome embraced.

"What in the seven hells?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -The Tale of Genji: also known as the Genji Monogatari, this epic tale was written during the Heian period by a noblewoman named Murasaki Shikibu. Playing with the name was really more tongue in cheek than anything, but I thought it was worth noting where I had pulled it from.


	5. Of Understandings and Unsurpations

"Genji," Kagome breathed.

She blinked a few times, shaking her head to clear it. He was still there when she looked again, bathed in the glow of the moon and looking torn between disgust and disbelief at the sight of them.

Abruptly Kagome realized she was still wrapped in Kouga’s arms. She flushed hotly, managing to extract herself from the embrace while Kouga was still caught off guard.

"Genji-sama!" she called, running over to clutch at his sleeve. She felt light headed with relief at the sight of a familiar face.

Genji glared at the wolf for a moment longer before glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. He scowled, lightly shaking her off of his sleeve.

"Sorry. I thought your ass needed to be saved. Didn't realize I'd be interrupting something."

Kagome opened her mouth to argue, horrified at the misunderstanding.

"Well now that you get it, dog shit, why don't you just run along and let me finish up with my woman," sneered Kouga, forestalling her.

"His woman already, huh?" drawled Genji dryly, his left eyebrow seeming to develop a sudden twitch. "Guess you're not as innocent as you pretend to be."

"No, Genji-sama, I-!" Kagome tried again.

"Don't you dare insult Kagome, you mutt!" Kouga cut her off once more. Kagome shot a glare at the wolf lord, willing him to be quiet.

"Why don't you try and stop me, you flea bitten wolf!" Genji snarled in return, his anger abruptly switching directions. His clawed hands flexed threateningly at his sides.

"Maybe I will!"

"Then shut your fucking mouth and come on!"

And suddenly they were moving towards each other, fists cocked and claws extended. Kagome panicked and did the first thing that came to mind. She jumped on Genji’s back, restraining him. Her shoulder screamed in pain at the sudden movement, but she managed to keep her hold.

"Kagome! Wh-what in the seven hells, woman? Get offa me!"

"Kagome! Don't touch that dog shit! You don't know where it's been!"

"Both of you just _be quiet_!" shouted Kagome. "Just listen! Genji-sama, Kouga-sama saved me from dying back in the youkai nest and then brought me here and told me I was his woman or something! It's all just in his head! And Kouga-sama! It's all just in your head! So please don't fight!"

"Kagome…" said Kouga, looking a bit hurt.

She nearly groaned at the sight. One would think that she had actually given some indication of returning his feelings.

"So he…abducted you?" Genji asked, putting the pieces slowly together in his head.

"I suppose so, a little bit," Kagome replied uncertainly. "But-"

"Fucking wolf!" snarled Genji, tearing himself from Kagome's hold. She squeaked quietly in pain at the jerking motion.

He closed the distance between himself and Kouga in a blur of red motion, his fist connecting with the wolf youkai's face hard enough for Kagome to hear the resounding crack as his jaw was dislocated. Kouga went down roughly and skidded a few lengths across the ledge.

"Genji-sama!" Kagome cried, darting forward to grab his arm before he could press the attack further. Kouga may have upset her with his unwelcome advances, but that did not discount the fact that he had saved her life.

"Get off, woman! It's a fucking imperial offense to abduct a servant of the Tennō!" Genji snapped. "And what kind of sick bastard takes advantage of a wounded woman?"

"Technically I'm not a servant of the Tennō-sama yet," Kagome said, grateful for the fact that Genji only struggled minimally to keep from wrenching her shoulder again. "And he didn't take advantage of me. He wrapped my wound so that I wouldn't bleed to death."

Kagome chose to pointedly ignore the fact that the Lord of the Eastern Wolf Tribe had taken a look at her breasts while she was unconscious. It hardly seemed a prudent time to air that grievance.

Genji ceased his struggles, glaring down at Kouga as he struggled to his feet. Kouga managed to rise, spitting blood and relocating his jaw with a quick jerk of his hand. Kagome winced.

"Please, Genji-sama. Let's just go back to Miroku-sama and Sango-sama. Whatever else might have happened, he saved my life," Kagome begged, crumbling the last of the inu-youkai's resistance.

"Keh. Whatever. Damn wolf isn't worth it anyway," he huffed with a disdainful toss of his head.

Abruptly he turned and scooped her up. Kagome squeaked, arms going instinctively around his neck to stabilize herself.

"Oi!" Kouga exclaimed, moving towards them.

"Don't you dare move, you fucking wolf. I'm taking Kagome back," Genji snapped, shooting the youkai one last warning glare. Shifting her to rest more firmly in his arms, he started forward.

Kagome sent a pleading look over Genji’s shoulder to Kouga, silently begging him to just stay put and be quiet. Oddly, Kouga seemed to understand. He stopped mid-step in his pursuit. He nodded firmly at her and Kagome frowned, sensing something idiotic coming on again.

"Don't worry, Kagome. I know dog shit has some sort of strange hold over you and you have to go with him right now, but I'll come to save you soon," Kouga called to her with the utmost sincerity. "I love you, Kagome!"

Kagome flushed for what felt like the thousandth time that night, dropping her head onto Genji’s shoulder in embarrassment and exasperation. No man had ever said something like that to her before, and she found her heart speeding up just the slightest bit. But it was so incredibly stupid.

She realized that Genji had stopped, tensing. He looked ready to turn back around and throttle Kouga.

Kagome clutched him around the neck more tightly to remind him of her presence in his arms, pleading quietly enough that only he could hear it, "Please, Genji-sama. Can't we just go back now? I’m exhausted."

A slight shudder seemed to pass through Genji and Kagome wondered at it. The night was hardly that cold. Thankfully he began moving forward again to leave, heeding her wishes.

"Don't worry, Kagome! I will come to save you from that half-breed mutt! It won’t be long before I come to claim you!"

Genji’s steps faltered at the word, but did not break his stride as he reached the edge of the ledge and sprang over it. He leapt nimbly from rock to rock down the mountain slope, looking determinedly forward.

"Half-breed?" echoed Kagome, unfamiliar with the term. She looked to Genji for an answer.

"Yeah, half-breed. Hanyou," spat Genji, as if the words were a bad taste in his mouth. He refused to meet her searching look.

Kagome had the distinct feeling that she had heard that word used before, but had no idea where or what it meant. Her village was small, after all. If it were some court term then it was likely she had never encountered it.

"What is that, Genji-sama?"

"Don't fucking joke like you're stupid, woman," Genji said with real venom. "Hanyou. Half-demon."

"Oh…" was all Kagome could manage, taken aback by his sudden anger.

She fell silent. For a time the only sound was that of the wind rushing past as Genji continued to propel them forward in leaps and bounds. His arms were horribly tense around Kagome, and she got the feeling that it was all he could do to not just drop her.

"If you're thinking something, just say it," Genji ground out at length. "Just say whatever shit you have to say and get it over with."

"Well…I suppose this…explains why your aura is different than that of most youkai. I noticed that when we first met," Kagome offered, though she had not really been thinking of anything besides how awkward she felt.

"Bullshit."

Abruptly Genji skidded to a stop. They were off of the mountain now and he placed Kagome down on her feet none too gently. She staggered slightly and looked to him, blinking in her confusion.

"Why can't you just say what you're fucking thinking? I thought _you_ would at least have the balls to say what you mean."

"What in the world are you talking about, Genji-sama?" Kagome said. "Is there something you want me to say?"

"Say what you're thinking! Say it's disgusting! Say it's an abomination! Say all that shit that everyone else says! Just don't fucking lie to my face!"

"Why do you insist on thinking I'm lying? And why would I be thinking something like that?" Kagome snapped, unable to restrain herself. "I don't understand what's disgusting! I don't understand what you're talking about!"

They glared at each other for a long moment. Genji seemed to be searching for something in her face, her eyes, her body. He was thrown off when he failed to find it, his glare melting into a deep frown. He snorted to cover his confusion, turning away from her.

"Feh. Whatever. Forget it."

"Wait! You don’t get to just blow up at me and then refuse to explain yourself!" Kagome said, irritated.

"If you don't get it then it doesn't matter," grumbled Genji. "C'mon. Let's go. The houshi and the woman are probably running around like idiots wondering where in the seven hells we are."

He squatted down, offering up his back to carry her this time. Kagome stared hard at him, wondering whether it would be worth it to push the issue. She had been truthful, after all, when she said she had no idea what he was talking about. Still, the likelihood of getting anything out of this ill-tempered emotional blockade of a man seemed unlikely at best. 

With a long-suffering sigh she decided that she did not have the energy for another fight. She climbed carefully onto his back, and he secured her with a clawed hand behind each knee. He leapt forward once more.

They traveled in tense silence, though Kagome was quietly thrilled at the sensation of nearly flying across the land. She wondered why he had bothered to ride a horse on the journey.

It struck her suddenly that he had been trying to hide his differences as much as possible. He had yelled something about her thinking him an abomination. It must have been something others had said to him before.

Kagome sighed. Now she felt bad, though she was certain she had not done anything wrong. For that matter she was the one who had been falsely accused. Even so…

"Do people treat you badly because you're a hanyou?" she inquired gently.

Genji stumbled in mid-leap, but managed to regain his footing and continue.

"I'm trying to get you back so we can bandage that shoulder up right. Damn wolf probably infected it with some weird disease. So how 'bout you shut up while I get you there?" he said.

"Is it so bad being a hanyou?" Kagome persisted, brushing off her annoyance. She truly wanted to understand.

Genji groaned. "It's a fucking stigma, alright? Satisfied?"

"Not particularly," Kagome replied, frowning. "I'm sorry. I'm just beginning to understand what it is to be part of the court and amongst its people. But growing up like that must have been so…"

Kagome trailed off, struck by the thought. She could hardly imagine enduring a lifetime of the anxiety and uncertainty she had suffered through in that first court meeting, feeling always an outsider in ways that could not be changed.

"It never bothered me. I never cared what they thought," Genji said stubbornly.

Kagome was silent. It was an obvious lie and deserved no answer. No one could possibly have felt nothing about being detested for the sole fact of their existence. He would not have been so angry at the thought of her viewing him the same way if it truly did not bother him.

Thinking about it, Kagome felt she could understand him a little better. He was not simply a rude person by nature. It also explained why he was so very eager to assume the worst of her. He likely rarely saw anything else out of people.

"Genji-sama?"

"What?" he bit out, anticipating more prodding.

"I failed my mission," Kagome admitted, surprising him.

"What?"

"Kouga-sama stepped in and saved me from being killed. I received help."

There was a long pause on his end.

"Did you die?"

"What?" 

Kagome blinked, surprised.

"Did you die?" Genji reiterated as if she were slow.

"Of course I did not die. I am here, aren't I?"

"Then you didn't fail your mission."

"But Kouga-sama helped me. The future Empress said I had to do it by myself."

"I won't tell if you don't."

"Genji-sama," Kagome said, gazing at the sharp ridge of his cheekbone incredulously. "Isn't that… dishonest? Aren't you bound by oath to tell the truth to the Tennō-sama or some such?"

Genji snorted.

"I thought you were so dedicated to helping all those little villages and people."

"I am!"

"Then you're going to give all that up because you're afraid of telling one little lie? Kinda shows how much resolve you really had, huh?"

Kagome was silent, considering this. It was unpleasant, but he was right.

"I suppose I will lie, then," she said resignedly.

"Yeah. Things in your little village were probably pretty clear cut, but the place you're trying to go is anything but. Sometimes it's just gotta be this way." 

Genji did not sound like he enjoyed it much either.

"I've got quite a bit to learn, then, don't I?"

"No."

"No?"

"No," Genji said. "You're better off now. To the Tennō, I mean. I don't think he needs anymore court-bred snakes to deal with."

"Really? But-"

"Just shut up. We're almost there."

Kagome barely suppressed a groan. It was nearly impossible to carry on a conversation with him.

Glancing around, though, she recognized the cliff that they were passing as the one that had been the nest of the bird youkai. Apparently Kouga's den had not been too far from the Fujiwara lands.

"Are they waiting in the Fujiwara residence?" Kagome asked.

"Yeah. They're waiting for me to bring you back."

Something occurred to Kagome suddenly. She craned her neck to glance at the his face.

"You…came to save me, Genji-sama?" she ventured slowly. She saw his face flush slightly in the light of the moon.

"I…I didn't come to save you 'cause I wanted to or anything, idiot!" he stuttered. "But the houshi and the woman just wouldn't shut up about it, and I knew they'd end up getting themselves caught too if they went in. And then I woulda had to come and save all your asses! Stupid. Who'd wanna come save you?"

Kagome drew back, stung momentarily. She opened her mouth, uncertain of what she would say but knowing that it would be fittingly scathing.

She paused. Slowly she closed her mouth, shaking her head. In the end he had come to her rescue, whatever he might say.

"Thank you, Genji-sama."

He was silent for a moment, having expected an argument. He found himself at a loss.

"Keh."

* * *

It only took them a little bit longer to reach the residence, a sprawling, blue-roofed and white walled estate twice the size of the Tachibana residence in the court. Kagome could see what seemed like thousands of covered walkways running through hundreds of lush gardens as Genji leapt over the fortified outer wall.

Sango and Miroku were there waiting when they landed in the main courtyard. Sango released the houshi's hand as if she had been burned, running over to practically tear Kagome off of Genji’s back. She enveloped Kagome in a hug fit to strangle, muttering jumbled chastisements and epithets of relief.

Miroku came to smile at the suffocating miko over Sango's shoulder, wisely refraining from joining in the hug. An easing of the lines around his face betrayed his worry and his relief.

Genji slunk quietly off somewhere, obviously uncomfortable in the midst of the group. Sango dragged Kagome into the residence and quickly found an empty room, kicking Miroku out as she stripped Kagome of her karaginu and thoroughly cleansed the wound. Kagome related to her the whole of the ordeal while the taiji-ya was busy rewrapping the bandages.

"In the end you got help?" Sango said, weaving forward and back as she maneuvered to pass the cloth over and around Kagome's shoulder.

She gave a final tug to make sure the bandages were wrapped firmly. Kagome winced and nodded.

"What are you going to do?" asked Sango anxiously, sitting back to regard her.

"No one need mention that Kagome-chan received help," Miroku said, sliding open the shoji to enter the room. Apparently he had been listening in.

Kagome yelped, quickly tugging her karaginu back up around her shoulders. Sango scowled, chucking the roll of bandages at him. It hit him square in the forehead, but he merely blinked as it ricocheted off into a corner. Calmly and without remark he sat beside the scowling noblemwoman.

"After all," Miroku continued. "It was not as if Kagome-chan requested Kouga-sama's assistance. He was merely acting on his own. So I see no reason to mention it."

"But Genji-sama knows what happened," said Sango. "Surely he will tell the Tennō-sama about this. He is his Majesty's direct servant, after all."

"No, actually," Kagome said. "Genji-sama suggested the same thing as Miroku-sama. He is not going to tell anyone."

"Ah…Genji-sama, hmmm?" said Miroku, tapping his chin thoughtfully with one finger. Kagome looked inquiringly at him.

"He seems very…concerned with you, Kagome-chan," Miroku offered as an explanation. "He has been keeping a quiet eye on you this entire trip."

"Really?"

Kagome frowned, digging in her mind for any reason that Genji might have to be interested in her. The only thing that she could imagine was that he was keeping tabs on her for the Tennō.

"Do you think we should be worried about him, Houshi-sama?" Sango asked.

"I do not think so," said Kagome slowly. "He is…hard to deal with, certainly, but somehow I can not see him as being conniving or deceitful. It just…does not seem to fit him."

Both Miroku and Sango cast curious looks at her, though she missed them in her preoccupation with her own thoughts. They exchanged looks, communicating silently. Sango shrugged.

"I suppose we will trust your judgment, Kagome-chan," she said.

"Then we are agreed that nothing of the wolf-youkai will be mentioned again," Miroku said. "We should rest here for tonight and tomorrow. No use rushing back. I will have a messenger sent ahead to set up another court meeting. My apologies, Kagome-chan, I am afraid you will have to suffer through another one."

Kagome's heart sank at the thought, but she forced a smile and a shrug. At least she had few days to mentally prepare this time.

"Alright."

"Come on, Kagome-chan. We will go find you a room to rest in. Unless you are hungry? We could get food instead," Sango said with something of a mothering air. She helped Kagome to stand and led her out if the room.

"No, thank you, Sango-sama. Just sleep will be fine."

"Alright, then."

Kagome was shown to a room and Sango took her leave, wishing her a good night. She settled gratefully into the expansive futon laid out for her. She slipped quickly into a deep sleep.

Her dreams, however, were not nearly so peaceful. There was nothing more to them than a few dark shadows and some vague sounds, but she would wake the following morning with a profound sense of dread.

* * *

The next day Kagome was allowed to sleep in until nearly noon to recover from her adventure. She was starving when she finally awoke, not having eaten the previous day. A servant brought her breakfast and helped her to prepare for the day, as well as re-bandaging her wound and checking it to make certain no infection had set in.

Once she was cleaned up and dressed in fresh miko robes, she went out to join Sango and Miroku for a tour through the many gardens of the residence. They proved to be amazing in both number and appearance.

The gardens contained everything from rows upon rows of precisely ordered sakura trees to koi ponds big enough that they required stone bridges to traverse them, each engraved with magnificent stone dragons and lined with colorful lanterns. Kagome felt all the awe and other-worldliness of entering the capital again. She wondered how the future Empress could possibly be so cold after having grown up amongst such beauty.

There was something odd about the estate, however. There were positively no nobles to be seen anywhere on the expansive grounds. Even servants seemed to be few and far between. Kagome voiced this observation to her companions.

The smile that had been sitting on Sango's face all morning slipped at the question, and she turned away from her to stare towards the outer wall of the garden. Confused, Kagome turned to Miroku. He frowned at her, shaking his head.

"It…It was not all because of the bird youkai, was it?" Kagome asked, recalling with a sick twist of her stomach the corpses the birds had been carrying when she encountered them.

Miroku shook his head once more. "Sadly, several of the Fujiwara were killed by the bird youkai. However, the true tragedy of the Fujiwara clan occurred several years ago. It…is a time in our history that most courtiers prefer not to speak of now."

Kagome continued to watch him expectantly, hoping he would go on. He turned away from her, as well. Silence descended over the three.

"We…will tell you eventually, Kagome-chan," Sango said at length. "Just be a little patient. The wounds of that period of time are still fresh."

"Alright," Kagome conceded reluctantly, storing her curiosity away for another time. Both Miroku and Sango seemed truly disturbed by the thought of having to speak of it.

"I think I will go fetch us tea," said Sango suddenly, with lingering discomfort. "Tea out here in the garden would be lovely."

Without another word she turned and headed hurriedly towards the main house. Miroku glanced at Kagome apologetically before trailing after her. Kagome remained, knowing it was best for her to simply wait and allow them time to compose themselves.

Kagome stood enjoying the scenery for awhile, along with the cool crispness of the winter air. She was absently wondering if she would get to see snow soon when the sound of footsteps alerted her to the presence of others. It was the two human guards.

They smiled at her and at each other, walking over to greet her with a bow. Kagome was surprised at the gesture, but quickly returned it. She could not help feeling a bit wary of the two, though, remembering the conversation of theirs that she had overheard. But nothing had happened so far, so perhaps she had simply misunderstood.

"We have been looking for you, Kagome-sama," said the taller of the two.

Zetsubode, Kagome remembered despite her surprise at his sudden respectfulness. The guards had been as polite as common courtesy required toward her on the journey, but had never seemed to hold her in this sort of high regard.

"Yes, Kagome-sama. We heard about how you defeated the nest of youkai single-handedly. We wanted to congratulate you," put in the other guard, Uragiri.

"You are assured a place at the Tennō-sama's right hand now," Zetsubode said. Suddenly Kagome understood their newfound respect for her.

"Well, thank you both."

"It is a shame though," muttered Uragiri, turning away as if he had not meant for her to hear.

Kagome frowned. "What is a shame?"

"Oh, nothing. Nothing at all, Kagome-sama. Uragiri-san simply does not know when to be silent."

"If something is the matter I would like you to tell me," Kagome said, concerned at the sudden shadow that seemed to fall over the two.

"Really, it is nothing, Kagome-sama," Zetsubode insisted.

"Except that your amazing talents as a spiritualist will all go to waste," said Uragiri, as if he could not contain himself.

"Uragiri-san! Be quiet! That is nothing that Kagome-sama need concern herself with," Zetsubode scolded the shorter guard. "Though it is a shame…"

Kagome looked back and forth between the two guards as they exchanged pitying looks, supposedly on her behalf. There was something odd about all of this, something stiff and strange.

"I do not mean to pry, Zetsubode-sama. Truly I do not. But I would very much like to understand what you are both talking about," Kagome said.

"Ah, excuse us, Kagome-sama! How rude of us to speak of all of this in front of you! Please forgive us!" exclaimed Zetsubode with an exaggerated bow. "Truly, though, I would prefer not to expose you to such unpleasantness."

Kagome pressed the guard with an expectant gaze, slightly frustrated with his reticence. At last he heaved a heavy sigh, surrendering.

"If it is truly your wish to know, Kagome-sama, then I am in no position to deny you," said Zetsubode, bowing once more.

"The problem lies with the Tennō," put in Uragiri, obviously the more outspoken of the two. "Certainly he will end up misusing your great power, Kagome-sama."

Kagome nearly stepped back in her astonishment. Never would she have thought that any courtier could so openly speak with disrespect towards the Tennō. Certainly she had had a few discourteous thoughts towards his Majesty in her darker moments, but she still knew that he was a man to be revered as the one who controlled the fate of their land.

Zetsubode saw the shock written deeply across her face and placed a restraining hand on his companion's shoulder, offering her an apologetic look.

"Pardon him, Kagome-sama," he said. "That was far too bluntly put for a delicate lady such as yourself."

"What does he mean?" Kagome asked, recovering enough to gather her thoughts. She was not nearly so delicate a lady as to let the issue drop now.

"I mean," Uragiri said eagerly. "Our current Tennō does not have the power to use such an asset as yourself in a fitting manner. You will be wasted on him."

"Wasted?" echoed Kagome. "What do you mean, his Majesty doesn't have the power? He rules the entire country, does he not?"

"Our current Tennō…might not prove to have so much power as you imagine," said Zetsubode carefully, and Kagome caught a glint of something sly in his pale eyes. "I think I can speak for both of us when I say that we merely feel your many talents could be put to better use in a…different capacity. A capacity you might find to be far more rewarding."

Uragiri grabbed her hand suddenly and placed something on her palm, curling her fingers closed around it. Caught off guard, Kagome could only stare blankly at her fist as the two guards executed quick bows and began walking off.

"We will be back to discuss this with you further after you have had an opportunity to think," called Zetsubode over his shoulder.

Kagome raised her head to watch their retreating figures, opening her mouth and half-reaching her empty hand out as if to call them back. She shook her head, deciding against it. She needed a good bit of time to process what had just happened.

She sought out a bridge and took a seat on its stone railing, opening her hand to examine what the guard had placed in it. She gasped and nearly tumbled off into the pond below, only managing to steady herself at the last moment.

A small jade snake, intricate scales carved all across its back, sat in her palm. She would never have even recognized the precious stone had a merchant passing through her village not shown her a pebble of it once, telling her that even that miniscule piece was worth enough to purchase food for her entire village for two months.

It was a rare stone imported from China, the merchant had said. The statuette in her hands was likely worth several of Sango's best silk juni-hito.

That was not all, however. There was also a small wooden seal, much like the one she had seen Miroku pull out when they first reached the capital.

It was painstakingly engraved with what she could only assume to be a clan insignia, a depiction of Susano-o-no-Mikoto, the kami of the rainstorm and wayward brother of Amaterasu. Whatever clan this emblem belonged to, they were most certainly not minor.

So then what in the world had the two guards been referring to? They had alluded to the Tennō somehow being incompetent or lacking in power. They had also suggested that her own power could be put to better use in some way other than direct service of his Majesty. Perhaps employed directly by the government officials?

But, no. If that was what they had meant, they would have simply come out and said it. There was nothing untoward about working directly for government officials. And there had most definitely been something off about what had just been proposed.

Kagome glanced down at the jade snake sitting on her palm, parallel with the clan emblem. She was hardly familiar with this sort of thing, but she was not ignorant enough to believe that the expensive little trinket was merely some reward for her recent ordeal. This was payment, and payment never came without the expectation of some sort of return.

So then perhaps she was being paid to serve the clan whose symbol now rested in the palm of her hand. That should not be so horrible considering that each clan was meant to serve the Tennō, and thus indirectly she would still be serving his Majesty and receiving the power to help those in need.

It was wrong, though. The way they had spoken of the Tennō, the way that they had so clearly waited to approach her until she was alone...

"Kagome-chan!"

Kagome jumped, nearly tumbling over the railing again. Instinctively she shoved the snake and clan emblem away into the front of her robes. It came to rest coldly against the swell of her breasts, and Kagome wondered vaguely why she had hidden it. Still, she made no move to pull it out again.

Sango and Miroku came trotting over, her arms laden with a tea tray and his with a large blanket.

"There you are, Kagome-chan. Do you still want to have tea?" Sango asked, seeming to be back in her usual high spirits once more.

Kagome stared at her for a moment, trying to force her mind back onto a normal track. Sango frowned at her when she failed to respond.

"Is something the matter, Kagome-chan?"

"No, no, nothing," Kagome replied. "I was just…somewhere else inside my mind. Tea sounds great, though."

"Good," Sango said.

The three made their way over to a patch of direct sunlight and laid out the blanket. The rest of the afternoon was whiled away with tea, snacks, and pleasant conversation about nothing in particular. Kagome savored such a peaceful moment with her friends, her slightly aching shoulder reminding her of how grateful she was to be alive.

Her conversation with the guards, however, continued to weigh heavily in the back of her mind. Kagome wondered why she had felt the need to hide it from Miroku and Sango. Still, she could not bring herself to share it with them no matter how hard she tried.

* * *

They spent one final night there at the Fujiwara residence to allow Kagome to finish recuperating before packing up to leave the following morning. They were provided with fresh horses to carry their belongings and escorted to the main gate.

Genji was there to meet them along with the two human guards. Kagome was amused to see that this time the hanyou did not even bother with a horse. She was considerably less amused to see the sly glances the two human guards threw her, feeling the weight of the snake and emblem heavy against her chest.

They set out at a slow pace for the benefit of the injured miko, whose shoulder was jarred terribly if the horse were to so much as break into a trot. The result was that as night fell and they settled down in a small wooded grove, they had not even made it off of the Fujiwara lands.

Genji, of course, went off on his own into the woods as soon as they began to set up camp. Kagome, almost unable to help herself, trailed after him. She had not seen him since he had brought her back from Kouga's den and he had avoided speaking to her all day. She could not help but be curious, Kagome argued to herself.

She found him lounging up in a tree on the edge of the woods, eyes closed as if he were asleep. The way his ears twitched at her approach, however, told Kagome he was awake. She waited patiently for him to acknowledge her presence.

"What is it, woman?" he groaned at length, cracking open one golden eye to peer down at her. "Keh. Can't get any damn peace with all of you humans around."

"I just wanted to speak with you," Kagome replied, unfazed by his irritation.

Genji blinked, his customary scowl deepening in confusion. The very concept that anyone would seek him out simply for the purpose of holding a conversation seemed a foreign one to him. He leapt down from his tree to stand before.

"About what?" he asked, almost suspiciously.

"You did not ride a horse today," Kagome said, the first thing that came to her mind.

"Didn't feel like it," Genji sniffed defensively.

"Ah, I see," said Kagome simply. Genji stared at her, one dark brow cocked in question.

"Is that all you came out here to say?"

Kagome considered this a moment before shrugging sheepishly, her cheeks flushing a faint pink.

"Moron."

Kagome bristled, crossing her arms over her chest. She had wanted to talk to him, but she had not particularly thought it through.

"Well, you avoided me all day…" she accused, her tone slightly more petulant than she intended.

"Ah…" said Genji, turning away. "That…"

"Is something the matter?" Kagome asked, catching the slight shift in his demeanor.

"Nothing. I just have a buncha crap to think about before we get back to the capital."

"Is it about keeping my secret from the Tennō-sama and the future Empress?" Kagome asked, guilt creeping over her.

The way Genji's shoulders stiffened just the slightest bit told her that she had hit near the mark, despite his silence.

"Genji-sama…"

"Look, it's not your concern. So just keep out of it, alright?"

"But-"

"Genji-sama! Kagome-sama! There you two are. We were wondering where you had run off to."

The pair turned to see the two human guards emerge out of the darkness from between the trees. Kagome tensed, eyeing the two warily.

"Is it time for us to go back and eat?" she asked.

"Not quite," replied Zetsubode. "Miroku-sama and Sango-sama are still busy preparing the food. We merely came to see what the two of you were up to."

Uragiri, Kagome noticed, came to stand unusually close to Genji as his fellow guard was speaking. Genji seemed slightly uncomfortable, but made no move to put distance between the two of them.

"So what were the two of you discussing?" asked Zetsubode with a too wide grin.

"None of your business," Genji said as Kagome hesitated.

"Ah, well, perhaps we should discuss something that is our business, then?" said Zetsubode, turning a smug eye on Kagome. "Have you had adequate time to consider our proposition, Kagome-sama?"

Kagome felt her stomach clench at the mention of that conversation. Genji shot her an incredulous look, golden eyes narrowing.

"What's he talking about, Kagome?"

"Simply a little alliance of mutual benefit, _Genji-sama,"_ Zetsubode drawled, his normally courteous expression dissolving quickly into something dark. "Kagome-sama is eager to gain power and profit, is all."

The hanyou's eyes flashed, his lips pulling back in a shocked snarl as he gazed at her.

“Genji-sama, no! I-"

There was the quick flash of metal in the darkness and a guttural groan was torn from Genji's throat. Uragiri had pulled forth a small dagger and plunged it into Genji's chest while the hanyou was distracted. Kagome shrieked, pressing her hands to her mouth in horror.

"Bastard!" Genji roared, blood flying from his lips as he reached up to tear the dagger free. He tossed it aside as if it had been no more than a splinter.

He spun towards Uragiri, fist cocked to deal a blow. Abruptly he stumbled, eyes widening as he lost his momentum and crumpled into a heap at the smirking guard's feet.

"You really think I'm foolish enough to believe a simple dagger will bring you down, monster?" laughed Uragiri, aiming a fierce kick at Genji’s rib cage. "I took the liberty of borrowing a bit of special poison from the taiji-ya's supply. Don't worry, though. It will only induce temporary paralysis. Woman didn't bring along any deadly poisons."

"Genji-sama!" Kagome cried, jerking forward to go to him.

She froze when Zetsubode drew his katana, holding it to the weakly struggling hanyou's throat.

"Please remain where you are for a moment, Kagome-sama. We have a few things to discuss."

Kagome complied, afraid that Genji would be harmed further if she dared to move. The hanyou managed to flop over onto his side to face her, his eyes burning accusingly up into her own. She bit her lower lip hard, feeling her eyes burn.

"Why are you doing this? Isn't he your fellow guard?" Kagome yelled, her voice choked.

"Hardly," snorted Uragiri. "It might be slightly more tolerable if the mutt was."

"Genji here is a prime example of the defects of our current government, Kagome-sama," Zetsubode said, pressing the tip of his blade more closely to the hanyou's throat. "He is an incompetent individual in an undeserved seat of power. For that matter, his very existence in our court is an affront. The Taira clan, whose insignia you currently have on your person, aims to fix all that once and for all."

Kagome's hand went instinctively to her heart, pressing against the wood of what she now knew to be the Taira clan's seal. She glanced at Genji, but his eyes were firmly shut now. Kagome winced, her chest constricting as she remembered his words about the ridicule his hanyou heritage had earned him.

"What do you mean, about Genji-sama being incompetent?" she asked, forcing the feeling away and settling on the question foremost in her mind. She needed to understand, to keep them talking.

"His very presence on this mission is a colossal blunder," answered Zetsubode. "The capital may well be in shambles by the time we return, the way he chose to leave it so abruptly and so needlessly. Not that he ever did much in the way of governing it before, but every ship needs a figurehead, I suppose."

"...Genji-sama's position is that important?"

"Ha!" Uragiri scoffed. “The half-breed persisted in using that name and pretending he was just a simple guard with you, huh? Let me ask you, who was it that came trailing after _Genji-sama_ when we were just about to depart from Heian?"

"The...future Empress," Kagome replied slowly.

"And why would the future Empress be so intimately associated with a mere guard as to personally go out of her way to stop him from going on this mission?"

"I…I don't know."

"You don't know, Kagome-sama, because there is no reason," Uragiri crowed triumphantly. "There is no reason the future Empress would go to so much trouble to stop a mere guard. Who would the future Empress go to such lengths for, do you think?"

Kagome was silent. She knew what answer her mind was drifting towards, but it was as if there was a wall that kept the thought from fully emerging. It was too outrageous.

"Your silence says you understand well enough, Kagome-sama," said Zetsubode. "Hopefully you will also prove intelligent enough to understand why we are doing what we are doing. Such an abnormal and inadequate creature, one who would abandon his throne on a mere whim, is unfit to sit at the head of our beloved country."

"Y-You think him unfit simply for this indiscretion?" Kagome asked.

"You know as well as we do that that would be unreasonable, Kagome-sama," said Zetsubode, his grin widening as he seemed to be making progress with the miko.

"He has, in the short time since his ascension to the throne, committed several grave offenses. He has introduced legislation attempting to take power out of the hands of the courtiers, so that he might hoard it himself. He has attempted to regulate the lives of the courtiers outside of the court on their own estates. Something he clearly has no business in.”

“He has even attempted so ludicrous a feat as to delegate national funds for his own purposes, without approval from the Council. Basically he is throwing the entire of our noble government into chaos. If none of that is enough to convince you, Kagome-sama, there is the simple fact that he is unnatural in his very existence. A human and youkai union is unnatural. It's disgusting."

Kagome bit her lip, her eyes sliding back down to the prone form of the hanyou.

The poison had taken full effect by now and he had ceased struggling, his golden eyes bright and furious as they darted from face to face. She tried to attach him to all of the grave offenses of which he was being accused, but found that she could not. All she could see was his scowling, honest face.

"And how does the Taira clan propose to fix things exactly?" Kagome pressed on.

"There's no change as long as the monster's around with his claim to the throne," said Uragiri. "So we get rid of him. The hanyou has a brother who is in a position to inherit the throne upon his demise, but the brother's been away studying in China since the little bastard's ascension.”

“We have a member of the Taira clan in position to act quickly upon being informed of the hanyou's death, taking the throne firmly in hand before the brother has a chance to return. Once in power, the Taira will return the court to its proper form. And there's certainly no dirty blood within the Taira."

"Then this is a rebellion?" 

Finally Kagome understood what it was that had bothered her so deeply.

"Rebellion is a very rough term, Kagome-sama, with far too many negative connotations," said Zetsubode smoothly. "It is simply a change, and life is nothing if not change. But if you must think of it as a rebellion, think of it as a bloodless and peaceful one."

"With the exception of the blood of his," Kagome pointed out.

Zetsubode shrugged. "Sacrifices must be made."

"What is it that you want from me?" Kagome asked, pulling from her robes the jade snake and Taira symbol. "Obviously this is payment for an expected service."

"We want you to work for our clan, of course," Zetsubode said. "Your…birth status is unfortunate, but when word spreads of what you have accomplished on this mission, you will become the stuff of legends. We will spread the tale, maybe exaggerate it a little, and there will not be a youkai in all of Japan that will dare come against the Taira rulers."

"But we can hardly just let you join us like it's nothing," Uragiri interrupted. "You have to prove that you will be loyal. You're common born, after all, and haven't been taught the same manners as a true courtier. We can't have you proving to be some little peasant snake in the grass."

Kagome nearly snorted at the absurdity of who such a statement was coming from, but managed to hold it back. She turned to Zetsubode, seemingly the more rational of the two, a question in her face.

"To prove your loyalty to the cause, we thought you should be the one to do away with our Lordship here," the guard answered her unasked question coolly, as if he were asking no more of her than to swat a fly.

"Do not worry. We waited until we were on Fujiwara lands for a reason. We will inform the court that it was a Fujiwara ambush. The future Empress is in a position to potentially seize power after the death, after all, and so the story will most likely be accepted without question."

Kagome was silent, unable to form a reply. Her composure seemed to evaporate like so much water in the sun. Her entire body had gone cold, the seriousness of the situation seeping down into her bones and making them like lead. They wanted her to kill Genji.

No, not Genji. The Tennō.

Since they had informed her of their plot there was no way that they would simply allow her to leave if she refused. Even if she were to call out for Miroku and Sango, it was impossible for them to get there before the hanyou was harmed. Someone was going to die here.

"Should you refuse, Kagome-sama, I am afraid that we could not allow you to leave here, you understand," Zetsubode said, sensing her hesitation. "I would encourage you to think on the wealth and power you stand to gain from this alliance. It is hardly a life you would be taking, anyway. There can be nothing but misery in the world for such a poor creature."

Kagome's hands had started to tremble slightly, her longbow resting heavily against her back. Her heart was beating a loud tattoo inside her head, muddling her thoughts. But she had to think and she had to do it quickly.

She kept her eyes trained unfalteringly on the ground, unable to look at any of the three people before her. There were a hundred questions and she did not have the time to think thoroughly through any of them.

"Your decision?" Uragiri grated out, impatient with her dithering.

Kagome looked up at him, his expression hard as stone. In that split second she made an almost instinctive decision, the consequences and whether it was right or not be damned. She pulled the bow from her shoulder and slowly drew an arrow from the quiver at her back, notching it.

Uragiri's grin of approval was nearly manic in its width. "Good girl!"

A smirk curled at the edges Zetsubode's lips as he lowered his sword and stepped away from the hanyou, allowing her a clear shot. Kagome leveled her aim at the hanyou's prone form, swallowing back her horror at what she was about to do. She drew back the string.

And whipped around at the last moment, loosing the arrow at Zetsubode. Her aim was true despite her trembling and it pierced him straight through the chest. The traitorous guard barely had time to look surprised before he collapsed.

Uragiri gaped at his fallen conspirator, a strangled noise bubbling up in the back of his throat. Kagome quickly notched another arrow and aimed at him, her shoulder twinging in reminder of her injury. Uragiri turned to her, his face drawn back in a horrid snarl. Kagome had never seen so much rage in one person's eyes before.

"You bitch!" he screeched, fumbling to unsheathe his sword. "You traitorous, common born little whore!"

"I don't want to shoot you," Kagome said, a faint tremble to the words. "Please just surrender quietly."

Uragiri screamed, charging senselessly toward her with his katana raised. Kagome closed her eyes and fired. It was a clean shot and she could hear the dull thud as his body hit the ground.

She opened her eyes, carefully avoiding looking at either of the fallen men. She managed to stumble over to Genji’s-no, but what else to call him?-still prone form, falling to her knees at his side. He finally opened his eyes and gazed up at her silently, still unable to move. There was something like awe in his face.

Kagome's eyes began to water, her breath escaping her in shaky little gasps. She doubled over, clutching her stomach to keep from being sick. She pressed her face into the fabric of the red karaginu beneath her, unable to hold back the wracking sobs that welled up.

She had killed two men.

Over the four prone forms in that clearing snow began to fall at last, coating everything in white.


	6. Of Consequences and Court Politics

"Kagome. Oi, Kagome."

Kagome hiccupped, raising her head from its resting place on the hanyou's chest. She swiped at her still leaking eyes with the back of each hand, clearing her vision enough to see his face.

He sat up beside her, the poison's effects apparently having worn off. Kagome felt only a detached sense of surprise. For the most part she was just drained, as if everything inside of her had been hollowed out.

"The poison wore off," he said lamely after a long moment, unable to think of anything else. He blanched slightly at the deadpan look on her face, red-rimmed eyes staring blankly out at him.

"That was fast," Kagome replied automatically, though she was not certain how long she had been crying there. It did not seem any darker or lighter out than before.

"Bastard didn't pick a very strong poison," he said, slightly disturbed by the lack of expression on her face.

Kagome’s gaze wandered, drifting about aimlessly to discover a world blanketed in white surrounding them. There were flakes resting on his hair and her own shoulders, but she could hardly feel the chill of it.

A few lengths from her were two raised mounds of snow, a hand sticking out from beneath one and a foot from the other. Kagome's eyes fixed on the two white graves, unable to turn away.

"I killed them," Kagome said without meaning to, and the words hung heavily in the air amidst the falling snow.

The hanyou stared at her empty expression for a long moment, realizing abruptly that this was the first time she had ever killed a human being. Mentally he groaned. Of course this would be the first time. She hardly looked the type to have gotten blood on her hands before.

"It…It ain't your fault," he offered, gratified when she turned her attention on him. "They forced you to do it. They would've killed you."

"That does not make it right," Kagome replied flatly.

The hanyou growled low in his throat, torn between frustration and pity. The bastards had threatened to kill her, but the stupid woman still looked devastated.

"Then think of it like this," he said. "I'd be dead if you hadn't killed them. Whatever shit they were spouting, there woulda been a hell of a lot of blood shed over a power shift that big. Not all the clans woulda just trailed along after the Taira like whipped dogs. You stopped all that from happening."

Kagome blinked slowly at him. Once, twice. Gradually the words seemed to sink in, and a bit of life returned to her eyes as they narrowed.

"You lied to me. This whole time you lied to me," Kagome said, and somewhere in the back of her mind a voice whispered that this was no way to address the sovereign of Japan.

"Yeah, well…"

"You're the Tennō," Kagome continued, and somehow it was shocking to say it aloud. "You're the Tennō. You're the Tennō. Genji isn’t even your name! You left the capital-your court! And the guards you trusted to protect you just betrayed you. They tried to overthrow you! And…and…"

"Thanks for the summary of events," he said dryly, though it was clear that she was verging on hysterics.

"Aren't you upset?!" Kagome cried, her voice cracking. "The two guards you trusted to come with you on this mission tried to kill you and take your throne! They…they said all kinds of horrible things!"

"Doesn't bother me," he muttered, turning away from her. "I shoulda known those two were a couple of snake-in-the-grass bastards. All courtiers are. So it doesn't bother me."

Kagome gaped at his stubborn, sullen profile, outraged at his casual dismissal of everything that had happened. She had done the unthinkable to save his life, and he was brushing it off as if it was nothing. Her hands curled into fists at her sides, so hard she could feel her fingernails biting into the flesh of her palms. 

"Why did you even do this?!" she exclaimed. "Why in all of Japan did you feel the need to leave the capital and come on this mission? Some kind of odd pity? Twisted curiosity? Did ruling our country just get too tedious for you?"

The hanyou whipped his head around to face her, eyes flashing.

"I did it because I fucking thought you might be worth it!" he barked.

That shut Kagome's mouth quickly enough. She stared at him, eyes wide. Slowly the snarl slipped from his face, and a flush crept up to replace it as he realized what he had let slip.

"That finally got you to shut up," he muttered to cover his embarrassment. "Idiot. We need to get going. We have to get back to Heian soon or there's gonna be a real load of crap to deal with."

The hanyou rose and shook the snow from himself. He offered her a clawed hand.

"C'mon."

"But…shouldn't we at least perform the final rites for them?" Kagome asked, feeling that she most definitely could not just leave the bodies as they were. "I mean, I know they were traitors, but…I still-"

"By the kami, woman!" he cut her off, shaking his head in exasperation.

He flopped down to kneel once more in the snow, clearing a patch of ground with his hands. He started to dig, grumbling a steady stream of profanities. 

Kagome began clearing her own area. She would have preferred to send them into the next life on a pyre as tradition dictated, but a burial was as much as they could do under the circumstances.

The ground was hard and cold, and soon her hands had gone numb. Fingernails chipped and broke as she scraped at the unyielding dirt. Before long her hands had begun to bleed.

Still Kagome continued single-mindedly. She had taken two human lives, whatever the circumstances. This could hardly even be considered an adequate punishment.

"Oi, wench."

Two clawed hands came to grip her wrists lightly, forcing them to still. Looking over her shoulder, Kagome saw that he had already finished his makeshift grave and covered it over again. She, on the other hand, had barely scratched the surface.

He tugged her out of the way, moving to take her place. He began digging once more.

"I'll finish this. You…make a marker for the other one or something. Without mutilating yourself, if you can manage that."

Kagome opened her mouth to argue, but was unable to find the will. She shook her head and scanned the area for a large stone.

Spotting one, she picked it up and sat it carefully at the head of the burial mound. She then took an arrow from her quiver and began to roughly scratch out the Kanji of the guard's name in the stone.

"Oi, Kagome."

"Yes?" she responded absently, focused on carefully etching in the symbols. Her injured hands throbbed with the effort.

"I…I'll make sure that these deaths aren't traced back to you. So don't worry about any clans trying to get back at you for this or anything."

Kagome paused in her work. She glanced over her shoulder at the hanyou, but he was focused on his work. She looked back down at the headstone and at the faint, shaky Kanji that was all that remained to mark the fallen guard's place in the world. A few drops of her blood were smeared across the stone, as well.

"I would prefer that you did not do that."

He froze, turning an incredulous stare on her. 

"Huh?"

"I did kill these two men. Whatever anyone else might know or not know, that fact will not change. I deserve any punishment coming to me," Kagome answered resolutely, finishing the last detail on the rock. 

"What? Do you know how many enemies you'll-?"

He cut himself off, the stiff resolve in Kagome's shoulders telling him that he could yell until the last breath left his lungs and he would still get nowhere. He growled low in his throat, cursing her stubbornness under his breath.

Lurking just beneath that frustration, though, was a sinking feeling. She was just some poor country hick that happened to have some spiritual ability, after all. Already she had the blood of men on her hands. Not monsters, the likes of which she was used to disposing of for the sake of her people, but men who had chosen the wrong path and might easily have chosen another.

Jeers of bastard and half-breed from lips hidden behind gracefully flapping fans echoed in his mind, and he knew that anything decent in the girl would not survive long in the world of the court.

"I'll protect you."

It was not until Kagome turned to gaze at him with curious grey eyes that he realized the words had come from his mouth. He could feel heat rush to his face and irritation prickle up to cover it.

"D-Don't misunderstand!" he snapped defensively, swinging around to resume his digging at a furious pace.

"After all the shit you've been put through, I'd have to be a real asshole not to let you serve me in the court! And the Tennō has to look out for his servants! That's all I meant!"

"Oh," said Kagome softly, taking this in.

She watched his rapid movements as he finished the grave and turned to retrieve the body. He laid it to rest with a surprising lack of malice, though there was a brief flash of something akin to regret in his golden eyes.

This was the man she was to serve from now on. Kagome found herself smiling faintly.

"Thank you. I will do my best to serve you from now on, Tennō-sama."

Inuyasha glanced back at Kagome, finding her face earnest and open even in her sadness. The thought that she really had been worth it despite all of the crap caught him off guard, and he coughed loudly.

"Feh."

* * *

The two finished the second burial mound and placed another stone at the head to mark it. This time the hanyou prevented Kagome from writing the inscription in favor of using his claws, which proved much faster and less painful for both of them.

They returned to the camp to find Miroku and Sango just finishing up with the preparation of dinner. It was a shock for Kagome to realize that the whole ordeal had occurred in the short span of time that it took them to catch and prepare a meal. For the difference she felt it might have been a lifetime ago that she had left the camp to follow the man she had thought was Genji.

No sooner had the houshi and taiji-ya opened their mouths to greet the pair then did the hanyou begin to bark orders to pack up. He offered no explanations, his stony expression saying clearly that he expected unquestioning obedience.

Sango looked as if she might challenge him on this, but a pleading look from Kagome convinced her to bite her tongue for the time being. Miroku, trusting Kagome, as well, followed suit.

The camp was quickly stricken and the horses readied. With a sharp pang, Kagome released the two horses of the guards into the woods. Their belongings she tossed into the fire, saying a quick prayer for the safe passing of their souls into a peaceful place.

For a time her gaze was helplessly fixated on the flames as their possessions were consumed. That weighted, hopeless feeling crept over her once more.

It was the horrible feeling of having done something so very permanent and so very irrevocable. It was the frightening feeling of knowing that she had the power to snuff out a life almost as simply as putting out a candle.

Kagome shook the despair off forcefully this time, pushing it to the back of her mind to deal with at a later time. For now she needed to focus on getting back to the capital quickly enough to prevent any further disaster.

At length she forced herself to put out the fire and mount her horse, alongside Miroku and Sango. The hanyou stood at the head of the group, impatient to be off.

Miroku and Sango both cast concerned glances at Kagome, but she merely shook her head to preempt any questions they might want to ask. She could not yet bear the idea of recounting fully what had gone on, and some small part of her was afraid of how they might look at her if they knew.

At the hanyou’s command they set out at a gallop, determined to reach the capital in no more than a day's time. Kagome's shoulder protested at the continuous jarring motion and her hands throbbed as they gripped the reins, but she bit her tongue against any complaints.

The wind kicked up as they rode, whipping flurries of snow into their faces. It was not long before the four had gone numb from head to toe. Still they rode on with dogged purpose. Kagome reflected bleakly that it at least dulled the pain in her shoulder.

The watchful glances of Miroku, Sango, and even the hanyou on occasion told Kagome that they were likely to stop if she expressed any discomfort, and they did not have the time to waste on her at the moment.

They rode on for what felt like an eternity to all, halting only briefly every now and again to rest the horses and take a drink.

Just before nightfall the following day, the gates came into sight. Kagome only barely managed to strangle a cry of joy, her shoulder throbbing so badly that she felt on the verge of falling from her horse.

The hanyou glanced back at Kagome, a frown lining his forehead. He yelled back to her to meet him in his chambers in the Inner Palace once she had had her wounds treated, before continuing on ahead of the group to the gates.

This earned no end of shocked exclamations from Miroku and Sango. Kagome realized that her friends had been just as ignorant to the presence of the Tennō on their journey as she had been.

It made sense, considering that only a few among the courtiers were ever allowed to see his Majesty’s face. The hanyou had also been using a false name to travel undetected among them. Absently Kagome realized that she had never thought to ask him what his true name was. 

Kagome reluctantly promised them a complete explanation of everything once she had eaten and had her wounds cared for. They agreed to this with equal reluctance as the group arrived at the eastern gateway.

They were allowed to pass without as much as a word of question from any of the guards. Their horses were taken by waiting servants upon their entrance.

Miroku suggested that they go to his residence to care for Kagome's wounds, as it was the closest one. Kagome, slightly dizzy with the pain in her shoulder and leaning on Sango for support, readily agreed.

It was a small building on the north-eastern edge of the Greater Palace, its solemn colors in the style of the Shingonin temple. There was a single snow covered garden behind the building. It had no pond, but did feature a large stone statue of the Buddha in a pose of deep meditation.

Miroku ordered medical supplies and food to be brought by one of the few servants tending the residence. He led the two girls to a modest guest room and settled in to 'supervise' the re-bandaging.

Sango, however, forced him out violently. Kagome nearly laughed at the sight, the strange normality of the scene easing her mind for a moment.

A servant brought the necessary medical supplies and settled in to take care of her, but Sango sent the woman off, insisting that she personally be the one to treat Kagome. Touched by the protective gesture, Kagome managed to summon up the nerve to recount the recent disaster.

She falteringly relayed the story in its entirety as Sango got to work, speaking just loudly enough for Miroku to hear her on the other side of the shoji. She shook while relating the death of the guards, barely managing to tamp down the feeling of horror that recalling it brought.

Sango wanted to discuss the issue in more depth, but the quiet anguish in her friend's eyes kept her silent. She merely laid a supportive hand on Kagome's good shoulder, offering what small comfort she could.

Faintly Kagome could hear Miroku chant a prayer for the souls of the deceased. There was also one said on her behalf, for the pardon of her indiscretions in the name of a righteous cause. Kagome felt her eyes well with tears, moved by their support.

She managed to rein the feeling back to a mere sniffle and a grateful smile, leaning over to envelop Sango in a one armed hug. The noblewoman was surprised at the intimate gesture, but returned the embrace warmly. It was good to see Kagome opening up, even if it was under such circumstances. 

"What? Am I not to be included in this beautiful display of affection? I am wounded, Kagome-chan, truly," declared Miroku theatrically, sliding the shoji open to enter upon hearing silence in the room.

Sango glared at him over Kagome's head. "You are lucky we finished bandaging already, Houshi-sama."

"You torment me as always with your suspicion, Sango-sama," Miroku responded, smiling. "I would never harbor indecent intentions towards the honorable Kagome-sama. She is, after all, now a personal servant to his Majesty."

He placed a tray of food before the two women. Kagome released Sango and took a pair of hashi and a bowl of rice from the tray, starting in on the food with vigor. It felt like it had been an eternity since she had last eaten. Miroku watched bemusedly as she nearly inhaled the food, but merely shook his head indulgently.

Sango picked up a bowl and began to eat as well, though at a much more sedate and well-mannered pace. Miroku held off on taking up his own share for a moment, looking thoughtfully between the two women as he considered the tale he had just heard.

"Kagome-chan?"

"Hmmm?" Kagome said, mouth full as she glanced up at him.

"Well, I feel it necessary to say that I agree with your course of action, though I am saddened that you were forced to do something so obviously against your principles," said Miroku. "However, I also must say that I believe things will become more difficult for you from here on. You killed two agents of a clan powerful enough to plot an overthrow with confidence.”

“You will also now be placed in a position at the right hand of the Tennō-sama, which will earn you more than a small amount of resentment because of your status and his Majesty’s own. I am sorry to burden you with more concerns than you already carry, but I want you to be fully aware of the situation."

"Ah…" said Kagome softly. "Yes…I suppose so."

In the back of her mind she had already acknowledged the fact that things would not be getting any easier any time soon, but those concerns had been overridden by her guilt over the guards. Now was the time to deal with everything, before going to meet with the Tennō.

Kagome sighed deeply.

“If you would not mind, Miroku-sama, I would be very grateful if you would explain to me what exactly the Tennō-sama’s position here in the court is. Obviously it is not as absolute as I originally imagined, if there are clans willing to try and take the throne into their own hands."

"That is a rather long story, Kagome-chan," Miroku replied. "Hopefully you are in a listening mood.”

Kagome nodded, urging him to continue. Miroku folded his hands in his lap, silent for a moment as he gathered his thoughts.

“The story begins about five years ago upon the death of our previous Tennō-sama,” he said. “His former Majesty, may his soul inhabit peaceful places, had two sons, the elder of which is a full youkai born of the former Empress. Naturally, it was expected that he would be the one to inherit the throne.”

“The former Tennō-sama, however, had a different idea. He had secretly had it written in an imperial decree, read upon his demise to the court, that his younger son would be the one to take the throne. His younger son being a hanyou, considered illegitimate by many as he was born of a noblewoman not even among his former Majesty's concubines.”

“You can imagine the upset this caused in the court. Of course, as this is the court that we are speaking of, the upset was a subtle one. Several court factions rose up to bar the ascension of the younger son to the throne, working through their officials in the Council of State.”

“Clan after clan stepped into the 'lead' role of government, each deposed in quick succession by death or disfavor. All foods had to be checked for poisons-that was a common, hard to trace method for offing an undesirable leader. The walkways of the capital ran red with the blood of those killed in the dead of night so that another might take their place of power.”

“It was a time of great fear and uncertainty in the court. Very few dared to challenge the larger clans as they ran amok.”

“Villages outside the court were also affected to a degree, as courtiers funneled funds out to finance battles fought amongst themselves and used the villagers on their lands as unwilling soldiers.”

“About a year ago, though, the handful of clans loyal to the younger son, or more so perhaps to the previous Tennō-sama’s will, managed to rally their forces enough to finally place the current Tennō-sama on the throne.”

“Of course, it did not hurt that many of the powerful clans had done much in the way of chipping away at each other by that point. They had little means left to continue the power struggle at that time, and most of them acknowledged that they would be unable to hold on to the throne for long even if they managed to get hold of it.”

“This, however, did not mean much other than a general quieting of the clans. The Council of State was and is still composed of members of the clans that fought to keep the current Tennō-sama from the throne, as there would have been further rioting had the loyalist clans attempted to remove them. And they are still determined that his Majesty should not exercise any true power.”

“Funds continue to be delegated on the whims of the Council and clans continue to keep their own armies. No decrees proposed by the Tennō-sama have passed successfully through the Council since his Majesty's ascension.”

“It is rather well known within the court that general opinion is against the Tennō-sama. The unfortunate reality is that more violent insurrections the likes of five years ago are not impossible, or even unlikely."

Kagome gazed with wide eyes at Miroku as he finished, stunned into silence. All of the information came to sit like rocks inside her head, clunky and heavy and hard to turn over.

The situation sounded much worse than she ever could have imagined. There were several parts to the story that she could not fully comprehend with her limited knowledge of how the court functioned, but what she could understand told her that the Tennō was in a very difficult place.

His Majesty was in a position of absolute responsibility with none of the power. Opinions were already set firmly against him, and any grievances with the way things were being run could be placed squarely on his shoulders.

He could neither move forward, nor in good conscience abdicate the throne and allow the court to fall back into pandemonium. The Tennō, the holy descendant of the goddess Amaterasu, was essentially a prisoner in his own court.

To top it all off, Kagome had all but sworn allegiance to his Majesty with her actions. The killing of the two guards would effectively gain her a court full of enemies and the undesirable notice of every clan scheming against the Tennō. Even if she wanted to back out into a smaller position in the court, there was no escape.

Escape was sounding pretty good, though. Kagome sighed, half-heartedly shoveling a few more bites of her rice into her mouth.

She placed her bowl down on the tray, the food like ash in her mouth. She glanced back up to find both Miroku and Sango gazing expectantly at her, awaiting a more comprehensive response.

"I…don't know if I can do this," Kagome found herself saying.

It was shameful, but it was how she felt. It was just too much.

"Kagome-chan…" said Sango, frowning. "You have come so far already. You just need to-"

"Sango-sama," Miroku interrupted her.

She turned to him, surprised. Miroku shook his head firmly. Sango frowned.

"We are in no position to place pressure on Kagome-chan," he said. "I believe she has enough to worry about without us forcing our opinions."

Sango opened her mouth as if to defend herself, but closed it after a moment. Shame crept onto her features. She turned contritely to her friend.

"I am sorry, Kagome-chan," she said, grasping one of her hands. "I did not mean to…"

"It's alright, Sango-sama. I understand. I'm disappointed in myself, as well," Kagome admitted, her gaze falling to her lap. "But I just don't think I…"

"Do not fret, Kagome-chan," Miroku said as she trailed off. "We will support you to the best of our ability in whatever course you choose to take from here."

"Yes, of course," said Sango with conviction, nodding.

Kagome offered a feeble smile to the two, feeling oppressed by their kindness despite their good intentions. Or maybe it was not their kindness, but something within herself. Kagome rose to her feet and bowed formally to the two courtiers.

"Thank you both," Kagome said. "I believe it is time I went to meet with his Majesty. Miroku-sama, might I request that one of your servants accompany me? I do not know the way to the Inner Palace."

"Ah, yes, certainly," Miroku agreed, slightly disconcerted by her lapse back into formality.

He stood and slid the screen open once more, calling a name down the hall. An older woman appeared and he instructed her to escort Kagome to the Inner Palace. Her eyes widened briefly in surprise and she shot her a furtive glance, but nodded obediently.

"Thank you both. I suppose…I will see you later," said Kagome, avoiding eye contact with either of the two.

"Kagome-chan…" said Sango, reaching out a hand as if to stop the girl.

Miroku placed a silent hand on her shoulder, giving her a look that said this was a matter in which they could no longer have any say. Sango scowled at him for being so logical when she could not be, but nonetheless clasped the hand on her shoulder and acknowledged silently that this was a decision that Kagome had to make all on her own.

The noblewoman watched her friend trail down the hall after the servant, her heart sinking. Perhaps it was wrong of her to want Kagome to stay and prove herself strong enough to take on an entire court. Perhaps it would be better to just let her go home and live the simple life the kami had intended for her when they placed her in her small village.

Still, it was a hard hope to let go of. 

"Houshi-sama…"

"I know, Sango. I know."

* * *

Kagome was only half aware as the servant led her along the avenues to the Inner Palace. Part of it was regret for so obviously having let Miroku-sama and Sango-sama down, but a larger part was worry over how she would face the Tennō. She had no idea what to say.

Every explanation that ran through her mind ended up sounding cowardly. Perhaps that was appropriate, she reflected morosely, as it was cowardice in many ways. She had thought herself stronger than this, and it was crushing to realize that she was not.

But the incident with the guards had left her so drained of resolve. She knew she would not be able to do what she had done again, but it seemed inevitable if she were to remain and serve a ruler in such disfavor with his subjects. Kagome sighed heavily.

Her focus returned to her surroundings as they reached the towering red wall that enclosed the Inner Palace. The servant woman seemed to be at a loss as they reached the guardsman at the gate, her gaze shifting nervously about as if in search of salvation.

The guard, however, took one look at Kagome and stepped aside to allow her passage, informing Miroku's servant that she was free to return to her master.

The guard nodded Kagome forward as the older woman gladly scurried off. Kagome passed hesitantly through the gates and abruptly found herself in a garden so lush she might have thought it a forest had it not been so well-ordered.

Their branches lightly frosted with snow, sakura trees lined the walkway. Just beyond them on both sides she could see glimpses of Wisteria trees lining large ponds filled with water lilies and colorful koi fish. Kagome jumped as two large white cranes strutted leisurely across her path, barely sparing her so much as a glance.

At the end of the long walkway was a wide flight of steps, at base of which towered a large orange and sakura tree on either side. Kagome climbed the steps up to a stone platform on which sat a large, wide building of wood, white walls, and black adornments. The roof was of the same sloping style as the others she had seen in the capital and a few steps led up to an elevated outdoor walkway around the building.

A woman, a servant judging by her subdued clothing, hurried down from the walkway towards Kagome. The woman smiled and the light lines around her eyes reminded Kagome for the briefest instant of her mother. Her eyes stung at the sudden wave of homesickness that swept over her. She would have given anything to go home at that moment.

"His Majesty is expecting you in his chambers in the Jijūden, Kagome-sama," the servant said, bowing. "If it pleases you, I will take you the rest of the way."

Kagome could only nod, unaccustomed to such respectful treatment from anyone inside the court. She trailed obediently after the woman as she was led up the small flight of stairs and through the low, pillared entryway of what the servant told her was the Shishinsen.

They passed quickly through the building, which contained only one large room with the focal point of an intricate throne, and went outside once more onto a covered walkway. It took Kagome a few moments to realize that rather than there being two bodies of water on either side of the walkway, the walkway had been built over the water.

She marveled at this even as her heart began to beat a little harder, anxiety over her impending confrontation setting in full force. She studied the small islands dotting the water to distract herself, each covered in a unique arrangement of smooth stones and colorful flowers. Snow fluttered down to rest on the surface of the water, lending to the entire scene a gentle feeling that Kagome could only wish she was more in a mood to appreciate.

"We are here, Kagome-sama," the servant woman said, forcing her back to the present. "His Majesty awaits you inside."

Kagome looked up at the moderately sized building before her, the walls white with vibrant red and gold detailing. Even the trim of the roof was done in some sort of golden filigree. On either end of the building sat a large stone statue, one of the Buddha in meditation and another of the sun goddess Amaterasu with the rays of the sun shining forth from her brow.

Kagome thanked the servant and took a deep, steadying breath before moving forward through the low entryway, pushing aside an ornate silk door hanging depicting a large white inu-youkai.

The room she entered was surprisingly warm, lit by the glow of a small fire pit in the center. It was a spacious room with white walls, several of which were covered in an assortment of intricate murals.

The walls were trimmed in gold filigree, and on the right side of the room sat a large, low desk of rich cedar wood. It was covered in a litter of official looking scrolls.

On the left side of the room was a sheer canopy of some gauzy white material, enclosing the Tennō's luxurious futon. The rest of the room was scattered with lush sitting cushions and ornate trunks filled with things Kagome could only imagine.

In the very center of the room had been placed a silk screen, depicting the same inu-youkai Kagome had seen on the hanging in the entryway. 

On the screen he was shown bounding across a star filled sky on the night of a full moon. Each thread was so delicately woven that Kagome imagined she might be able to feel the shaggy texture of the youkai's fur if she touched it. A stern-looking guard stood on either side of the screen.

Lighted from the back, the vague outline of the Tennō was visible. Ignoring the plummeting of her stomach into her feet, Kagome came to kneel stiffly on the cushion placed before the screen.

"You guys can leave now," came the rough voice from behind the screen, addressing the guards. "I want to speak to the miko alone."

The guards nodded and exited without question. Kagome watched them go warily, recalling her last encounter with royal guards. She suddenly regretted not having brought her bow with her, and was repulsed a moment later that she had even had the thought.

"Not all of my guards are traitors," groused the Tennō.

Kagome jumped as the voice sounded closer to her than she had expected. His Majesty had come to recline on a cushion just to her left, most definitely not behind the screen any longer.

"Ah…but, the screen, Tennō-sama," Kagome said, gesturing feebly at it.

"Tennō-sama?" he echoed, his face twisting as if he had smelled something unpleasant. "Oh, yeah. I guess I never told you. The name’s Inuyasha. All that ‘Tennō-sama’ bullshit weirds me out.”

“And the stupid screen's just for show. If I didn't make it look good then there'd be rumors flying all over the court in no time."

"But, your Majesty…" Kagome floundered, caught off guard by his familiar manner now that she knew the truth of him. She had naturally assumed that they would be observing the proper formalities once in the capital.

"I-nu-ya-sha."

"...Inuyasha-sama-" Kagome tried in placatingly.

"There. Glad we got that outta the way," Inuyasha interrupted. "I summoned the Council for an emergency meeting."

"And what…happened?" Kagome asked reluctantly, setting aside for a moment her own concerns.

"Obviously they all played dumb about the whole thing, even the Taira clansmen," Inuyasha said, disgust thick in his voice. "They all said it was all just those two guards acting on their own. They're pretty quick to dump their clansmen when their asses are on the line.”

“Seems like there were instructions not to make any moves 'til they got word of my death, 'cuz none of the Taira clan did anything while we were gone according to the reports I got."

"What do you intend to do to them?"

"Do to them?" echoed Inuyasha incredulously. "If that's how you think it works then you don't know shit about the court."

"Of course I don't," Kagome returned, irritated. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, I can't fucking do anything about it," Inuyasha bit out. "Since you and me are the only ones that saw what happened with the guards, we've got no proof that's worth shit to anyone.”

“If I try to punish a clan without damn good proof of what they've been doing, not only will that clan riot, but so will every other clan that's got the smallest problem with anything. It'd be like handing the bastards an excuse to rise up against me."

"Then you're just going to let them get away with this?" exclaimed Kagome.

"Court politics," huffed Inuyasha, the sharpness of what was meant to be a careless shrug betraying his irritation. "I'll watch 'em closer from now on. Bastards'll probably be on guard and play good for at least a couple months."

"And then what?" Kagome snapped. "You let them try it again and maybe succeed? You let them take over the court? You let them throw everything into chaos and use helpless villagers to fight their battles?"

Inuyasha's keen golden eyes slid over to her, staring hard at her for a long moment. "Someone told you?"

"Miroku-sama told me everything, and to be honest I'm not sure if I can do this anymore," Kagome bit out, unable to contain it any longer.

If nothing was to be done, if the plotting clans were just going to win anyway, then why had she killed those men? What was the point of any of it?

"…You're backing out?" asked Inuyasha, his eyes darkening. "Then go. No one's forcing you to stay."

He turned away from her to glare fiercely at the cedar desk, a clear dismissal. Kagome sat frozen at the abruptness of it.

"Inuyasha-sama, I-" Kagome said, uncertain of what she would say but knowing she could not simply leave things like that.

"You said you can't do it, so get the hell out already," snarled Inuyasha, getting up to pace agitatedly back and forth behind the screen. "It's not like it's a surprise or anything. You're just some village hick from nowhere. My fucking fault for thinking you had some guts."

"I do want to help!" protested Kagome, rising to stand in his path. Lurking beneath all of his ire was something that sounded suspiciously like disappointment, and it cut just as much as Miroku and Sango's had.

"I really want to! That's the whole reason I agreed to that ludicrous mission in the first place! But I…I killed two men. I know you must have seen a lot worse, and suffered through things much more horrible, but I can't do that again.”

“And I don't know how long I could last in a court filled with people that I would have to be suspicious of every moment of every day. I just wanted to help the villages, and I don't think I can…"

Kagome held his gaze, willing him to understand and valiantly holding back tears. Inuyasha's expression remained unyieldingly fierce, but a subtle easing of his posture told her he was listening. He could understand what she was saying at least.

It occurred to Kagome suddenly that everything she was now so desperate to flee from was everything that Inuyasha had already fought through three times over. And worse than she could imagine, as an illegitimate half-breed son in the ultimate position of power and scrutiny.

But she was frightened. She had not been raised for this or among this. All she had anticipated in coming here was to do what she had always done in a higher context, heal the sick and protect against evil youkai who would cause harm.

Court politics, secretive plots, underhanded power plays, poisoning, murder in the dark of night…it was all so far beyond anything she had ever had to deal with. In such a large and complicated world Kagome was utterly lost.

She longed for home and simplicity and family. For the place where she held the respect and regard of the people around her. For the place where her hands were always covered in dirt, but never in blood.

But if she ran away now, back to the safety of her village and a world she understood, what would that accomplish? The villages and common people of Japan would be no better off than before.

Sango and Miroku, who had been so kind to her despite everything, would be left to suffer through the same fear and oppression of five years ago. The capital would fall back into chaos and would probably drag the rest of the land down with it before long.

There was Inuyasha, too. He would be left to struggle alone again, with no one to depend upon and everyone to suspect. Some part of him had been looking for an ally in her, Kagome realized.

That was why he had done something as outrageous as leaving the capital to go along with her. She was uncertain of what he had been hoping to gain from it, but his upset with her desire to leave told the story clearly enough.

"Listen, just go back already," said Inuyasha, breaking Kagome from her thoughts. His voice lacked some of its earlier harshness, and his gaze was fixed firmly just over her shoulder.

"You weren't meant for this. You're already half-crazy, so you'd be out of your mind within the week. Just…go home. No one will come after you again."

Kagome considered this and him for a long moment. He was willing to let her go to spare her. This was the out she had been hoping for. She was not meant for this, after all.

"You…you said you would protect me, didn't you, Inuyasha-sama?" Kagome said slowly.

"Eh?" Inuyasha’s gaze shifted to her face, dark brows rising in question.

"Back on the Fujiwara lands. You said you would protect me, didn't you?" Kagome pressed.

"I-I didn't…What in the seven hells does that have to do with anything?" Inuyasha sputtered, flushing faintly.

"Well, you said you would protect me. You're trying hard to keep your end of the deal, but I forgot mine. I promised I would serve you faithfully," Kagome said quietly.

The discomfort vanished from Inuyasha's countenance. His eyes searched hers, his expression sobering.

"What are you saying?" he said lowly. 

"I'm saying…" Kagome hesitated, searching for the words to fit what she felt. "I am saying that I do not want everything I have done until now, and everything that has been done for me, to be pointless.”

“I'm scared out of my wits. This is all so much bigger than I ever could have imagined, and I can't help but think that my presence here will be useless. But that should not stop me from trying. That's not the way I want to live. That won't accomplish anything.”

“I want to help you make a better country, Inuyasha-sama, for everyone's sake. And if that's not your aim as Tennō-sama, then I want to make it your aim, as presumptuous as that may sound. I want to help you, Inuyasha-sama."

"Kagome…"

Inuyasha's jaw clenched and he shook his head.

"You already know that everything is stacked against me," he said at length. "I don't have a single damn thing working in my favor. I'm the half-breed mutt, the bastard child, the second son. I wasn't even allowed the formal education most courtiers get.”

“I've got no idea why in the seven hells my old man decided to do this to me. One of those battles must have knocked his wits loose or something. And I sure as shit can't see things changing anytime soon.”

“The only thing I want is to get through all this shit alive and without the whole thing collapsing. So I don't think I can build this perfect world you're imagining."

"I'm not naïve enough to ask you to build a perfect world, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome said. "Perfection is impossible. Even I know that.”

“I won't ask you to make the people happy, either. That's a choice that they have to make for themselves. All I would ask is that you work hard to make a place where each person has the room to make that decision.”

“I don't think you have completely given up yet, either. I don't think you would be bothering yourself with me if you were truly done with everything."

"You assume a lot, woman," Inuyasha said, though he did not argue with her. "What about the guards? I can't promise you'll never be put in a situation like that again, not with things in this court as fucked as they are."

Kagome's heart clenched at the question. She had expected it, but had no real resolution for such a problem.

"I…" Kagome faltered. "I realize that. And I really don't want to ever be forced to take a life like that again. The thought makes me feel sick.”

“I don't want the kami to shun me when I die because I dealt carelessly with the lives of their children. But…better that I carry the weight of every life I take with me for all eternity and do what I can to atone, than that many should suffer because I am afraid. I think the kami would see that as far more disgraceful.”

“Besides, if I quit now, taking the lives of those two guards really will have been for nothing. I should appease their spirits, at least, by continuing forward with the cause for which they died."

Inuyasha eyed her contemplatively, silent respect welling within him. She did have guts, he'd give her that.

"…I did promise to protect you, as the Tennō, if you really intend to stay and see this through," he said at length.

"Then I can remain and serve you?" 

Her face was hopeful as she raised it toward him.

"I-I guess so," Inuyasha muttered, looking away.

"Well, there is the first thing we can fix," Kagome said, beaming and feeling truly relieved for the first time since the death of the guardsmen. "You are the Tennō-sama. You do not 'guess' anything. You simply know. Or at least that is how it has to seem."

"…Yeah," Inuyasha agreed slowly, surprising Kagome. She had expected some sort of snarky comment, but he seemed willing to listen to her.

That was good, Kagome thought. Together with him she was going to try to rebuild a nation. They would probably need to be able to at least hold a decent conversation first. She grinned wryly at the thought.

"I'll hold a meeting with the Council tomorrow and tell them you'll be serving officially as a court spiritualist from now on," said Inuyasha, recalling her attention. "They already know you're the one who took down the guards, so this ain't gonna sit well with most of them, especially the Taira clan. Be on your guard for that.”

“They'll probably insist on having a court ceremony held to officially induct you, so be ready for that, too. You'll also 'officially' be a target after that. I'll arrange it so you can start training next week. I've also got a way I can keep you nearby so I can make sure you don't do anything stupid."

"How is that?" Kagome asked, aware that it would look suspicious for even an official servant of the Tennō to be in close quarters with him for extended periods of time.

"Ah, well," Inuyasha coughed, looking suddenly uncomfortable. "I…told Kikyou that you succeeded in your mission, and about what happened with the guards. She took the story, but still looked suspicious. When I asked her what you could do to convince her, she said she…wants you to serve as her lady-in-waiting."

Kagome's brows shot up to meet her hairline. 

"It'd give you a way to stay in the Inner Palace without questions," said Inuyasha defensively. "Besides, she said it was the only thing that would make her accept you. Obviously she's around me a lot, so she's gonna have to accept you if this is gonna work."

Kagome suppressed a groan. Working under that ice woman who had caused her such trouble to begin with was not appealing in the least. But if it was for the cause, then it had to be done.

"Alright, then," Kagome sighed. "I can play at lady-in-waiting if need be. I just don't understand why Kikyou-sama seems to mistrust me so much."

"Kikyou just has a rough time with change," Inuyasha said, his expression softening a fraction.

Kagome wondered at the fondness that warmed his eyes. It was an expression she had never seen from him before. It was nice to know he still had those sorts of feelings in him.

"Tennō-sama!"

Inuyasha and Kagome whipped around simultaneously at the unexpected voice. Inuyasha turned and shoved Kagome into a sitting position, dropping down to sit in front of her to block her outline against the silk screen.

"Yeah, what is it?" he barked.

Mentally Kagome groaned. They would need to work on getting him to speak in a manner more befitting his station.

"My apologies for the intrusion, Tennō-sama," the guard said from the other side of the screen, his outline shifting as he bowed low. "But there is trouble. A gate guard has brought word that an outsider has somehow managed to gain entrance to the capital without permission.”

“The guards attempted to stop him, but he proved to be too swift for any of them to catch. As of now he has harmed no one, but they sent me to warn you that he seems to be making his way towards the Inner Palace."

"The hell?" Inuyasha swore. "What-"

But the hanyou was cut off as an almighty wind swept into the room, sending the papers on the cedar desk flying and blowing in with it a flurry of snow flakes. The guard cried out and there was a thud as he was knocked aside.

"Oi, dog-shit!" called a voice. "Come on out, and bring Kagome with you! I know she's in here! I tracked her through this whole stinking place!"

Kagome froze, her every muscle winding tight. She could feel Inuyasha tense beside her. He recognized the voice, as well. Kagome prayed to all the kami that they were both wrong and it was just a murderous maniac out for their heads.

Slowly Kagome peeked her head out from behind the edge of the screen. There in the entryway, snow dusting his hair and shoulders, stood Kouga. He looked quite proud of himself, too.

He caught sight of her and a beaming smile stretched its way across his face, fangs glinting in the firelight. His tail waved enthusiastically behind him.

"Kagome! See, I told you I would come to save you!"

Kagome would have laughed at the absurdity of it had Inuyasha's growl not been rumbling through the ground beneath her. She turned her gaze to the hanyou. His eyes seemed to be glowing, filled with a burning brilliance of their own.

"I'll kill him."

  
  



	7. Of Rumors and Reminders

* * *

Before Kagome could so much as blink, Inuyasha had toppled the silk screen and lunged at the wolf youkai. Kouga was caught off guard, as well, and the fist planted solidly in his gut sent him skidding across the room, through piles of cushions, and into the far wall. A resounding crack told Kagome that it was likely some ribs had been snapped.

"Damn wolf!" snarled Inuyasha, advancing on the dazed youkai. "What in the seven hells are you thinking, breaking into the fucking imperial palace!"

Alarmed, Kagome scrambled up from her place by the overturned screen. She slipped clumsily among the many silk cushions, trying to make her way over to the enraged hanyou.

"Inuyasha-sama! Wait!"

Inuyasha did not spare her so much as a glance, but rather continued his menacing advance. Kouga struggled dazedly where he lay. He wheezed faintly, spitting blood onto the tatami mats of the floor.

"The hell I'll wait, woman! First he abducts you, then he breaks into _my_ fucking court! This asshole needs to be taught a lesson in fucking boundaries!"

Inuyasha reached Kouga and dragged the wolf up by his hair. Kouga struggled feebly, still winded from what had been an especially savage blow.

"Inuyasha-sama, please wait! Please!" Kagome tried again, stumbling her way over to the Tennō at last.

She hovered at his side, uncertain how to calm him down. This was quite an idiotic stunt for Kouga to have pulled. She was a little tempted to hit him herself…

Inuyasha spared her a scathing look, but seemed to be hesitating at the sight of his nearly incapacitated enemy. He shook the wolf roughly.

"Oi, wolf shit. You awake?" he drawled, shaking the wolf once more for emphasis. "I want you to be able feel it when I rip that flea bitten tail right off your ass."

Kouga hung limply in his grasp, unmoving. Inuyasha eyed him, contemplating throwing the wolf into another wall to rouse him. Or kill him. Either one would do, so long as the youkai could no longer stir up shit in his court or sniff around Kagome when he had no right.

"Inuyasha-sama, he did save my life, whatever other foolish things he may have done," Kagome said, utilizing the only weapon she really had in her arsenal at the moment. "Don't you think you should-?"

"I think I should throw his mangy ass into the imperial prison and let him rot there," Inuyasha cut her off, irritated with her continuing defense the mangy wolf. "This is the second fucking time he's messed with imperial business. And you can't harp on that 'life-saving' shit for-"

Kouga's foot in his gut cut off the rest of whatever he was going to say. The wolf Lord had been playing possum.

Inuyasha swore loudly, tossing the offending youkai away. Kagome gasped, stumbling backwards in her surprise.

"Stop it! Both of you need to stop it!" she cried desperately, beginning to truly fear what the outcome of this might be.

"Like hell! I'm gonna save you from this dog-shit, Kagome!"

And Kouga was back up and heading for Inuyasha again. Inuyasha, on her other side of the room, was doing the same.

Kagome would have rolled her eyes at their childishness had she had the time. Rather she did the first thing she could think of to prevent the impending bloodbath.

Unfortunately that first thing turned out to be throwing herself directly in Kouga's path. Even more unfortunately, Kouga was so startled by her sudden move that he skidded to an awkward halt. And to put the unfortunate crown on it all, Kagome, surprised by his stop and already unbalanced, stumbled straight into his arms.

Time stretched on in oppressive silence like a cord pulled taut. Kagome could almost hear Inuyasha's surprise and outrage growing behind her. She struggled weakly against Kouga's hold on her, mortified by the awfulness of the situation.

"The fucking hell, woman!" came the roar from behind her, snapping the cord at last.

She was yanked roughly from Kouga’s embrace and pulled back to Inuyasha's side. She winced as her shoulder was jarred by the motion.

"Oi! Don't touch my woman, dog-breath!"

Kagome was yanked back against the Kouga’s chest, her head beginning to spin at the abrupt motion. Kouga leapt away, pulling her along, as Inuyasha advanced and reached out to reclaim her.

"Nuh uh, shit for brains. She was obviously asking me to save her from you. Kagome's coming back with me to be the Lady of the Eastern Wolf Tribe. And together the two of us are gonna dominate the eastern lands," Kouga sneered, nimbly snatching her just out of Inuyasha's grasp each time the hanyou lunged and reached for her.

If there was one thing Kouga had over Inuyasha, it was certainly speed, Kagome lamented absently as she was thrown about like a doll between the two. Abruptly Kouga's words sunk in past the rattling of her brain inside her skull. Kagome stiffened, renewing her struggles against his hold.

"Kouga…Kouga-sama! Hold on! Please, put me down!" she snapped, shoving back against the fur-covered armor on his shoulders.

"And let that dog shit put his dirty paws all over you? I don't think so, Kagome!" Kouga said, continuing his game of keep-away with the hanyou.

"Dammit, you stupid wolf! She said put her down! Hold her much longer and she's gonna get your fucking fleas!" Inuyasha snarled.

Kagome groaned. They seemed to be determined to ignore her wishes entirely. She decided it was time for one last ditch attempt. She took a deep breath.

"Ah! Kouga-sama! My shoulder! My shoulder! It hurts!"

It was true enough, Kagome reasoned to herself. Her shoulder was beginning to ache again, despite the fact that Kouga was being careful about jostling that particular part of her. Still, the way that they both slid to an abrupt halt at the words told her that the small deception was worth it.

Kouga placed her carefully down on one of the cushions the two had torn up during their romp through the room, kneeling down at her side.

"I'm sorry, Kagome. I didn't realize-"

Inuyasha shut him up with a fistful of feathers from torn pillows to the face and a good shove. He took the wolf's place at her side.

"Idiot! Why the hell are you throwing yourself all over him when your shoulder is hurting?!"

"I wasn't-!"

"Shut up! How bad is it? Does it need to be bandaged again?" Inuyasha said, prodding around the wound with surprising delicacy.

"It's not that bad, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome replied, wondering at the careful touch. Her face felt a little warm as she watched him examine the wound with some kind of coarse concern.

Kouga came to sit grudgingly a short distance away from her, hesitant to argue with the hanyou or touch her again lest he injure her further. He settled for glaring with extreme hostility at Inuyasha as he inspected her.

Kagome felt a bit guilty for making them both worry over something so small, but was rather satisfied at this momentary truce. This was what she had been angling for. Now it was time to put her sudden little idea into motion.

"Kouga-sama," Kagome began, her voice calculatingly polite. "I am terribly sorry you came all this way, but I really do not require saving. And certainly there were…better methods you might have employed if you wished to come see me."

"But I-" Kouga began to argue, thrown by her sudden formality.

"However," Kagome said. "Now that you are here, you might as well remain awhile. At least until you and Inuyasha-sama can settle matters in a satisfactory and civil manner. You are a Lord, after all, and I am certain Inuyasha-sama can have quarters arranged for you for a time here in Heian."

Kagome turned an insistent look on Inuyasha, hoping he would catch her meaning. Inuyasha returned her look with one of utter revulsion.

"Like hell I'll stay let this disease-ridden wolf stay in my court! He fucking broke in and tried to take advantage of you again!"

"Inuyasha-sama," Kagome gritted out with strained patience. "Kouga-sama most certainly did have a few errors in his judgment of the situation, but he _is_ a _Lord_ , after all. And it is the Tennō-sama’s wish to remain in _good favor_ with all of the Lords, is it not?"

The harshness in Inuyasha's expression morphed slowly into understanding, though it looked to Kagome to be only a partial, questioning sort of understanding. Nonetheless, if he got it even a little, he would play along with her.

"Wait… _You're_ the _Tennō_ , dog breath?"

Both Kagome and Inuyasha turned from their silent communication to stare at the wolf Lord, twin looks of disbelief etched on their features. He stared back blankly.

"You…just realized that?" Kagome said, unable to contain herself.

"I knew you were fucking stupid, but even I didn't think you were this much of a moron,” Inuyasha said, a slight twitch developing in one dark brow. "Where in the seven hells do you think you are, asshole?"

"I…" Kouga hesitated, taking a true look at his surroundings for the first time.

A bit of uncertainty slipped into his eyes, but he puffed himself up and scowled more deeply to cover it.

"It ain't like anyone would ever peg dog-breath here for bein' the Tennō," he said more loudly than necessary. "And even if he is, that doesn't change anything. I ain't giving Kagome up."

Well, this general lack of respect for the Tennō and his authority was certainly another thing to add to the long list of issues that would have to be addressed, Kagome noted. More so she marveled at the wolf Lord's utter lack of all sense.

From the corner of her eye, she saw Inuyasha-sama's lips pull back in a fierce snarl, his hands curling into fists at his sides. He tensed, and she could tell he was ready to go for the throat. Kagome reached out instinctively, placing a restraining hand lightly on his arm.

Inuyasha’s blinked, his gaze shifting questioningly to the delicate touch. Taking advantage of the opening, Kagome shifted subtly in between the two. Facing Kouga, she made certain that she caught his eyes with her own before speaking.

"Kouga-sama," she began, in the most demure and appealing tone she could manage. "I am aware that you and Inuyasha-sama, his Majesty, have many differences to work through.”

“However, I do not believe it proper that you address the sovereign of your country in such a manner. It would also please me greatly if you would remain for a time in the court until all matters can be settled to our satisfaction."

Kagome held his eyes for a long moment, willing him to go along with it out of consideration for her. Admittedly it was a bit low to play on his odd infatuation with her, but for the moment it was necessary. She would make herself clear in the time to come.

"Well, I…uh," Kouga said, coloring slightly under her intent gaze. "Fine, I guess. Whatever my woman wants. As long as dog shi-…as long as _he_ keeps his grubby paws off of you, Kagome."

"Thank you, Kouga-sama," Kagome said, giving him a smile and gripping Inuyasha's arm more firmly as she sensed his youki flaring behind her. "I will go fetch a servant who can take you to temporary quarters until we can have better accommodations prepared. Is that agreeable, Inuyasha-sama?"

The hanyou did not argue, but gave her a dark look that clearly said he was neither satisfied nor finished with her. He then turned his glare to Kouga, and Kagome took it as permission.

She rose and went towards the entrance, praying the two could remain civil for just a few moments. She picked her way carefully among the torn up cushions and scattered feathers, stopping for a moment to check on the unconscious guard that had come to warn them of Kouga's unexpected arrival. It seemed to be just a bump on the head, but she would have to call someone to tend to him.

She slipped out from the Tennō's quarters and into the cold night air. It was still snowing lightly, and a group of people were huddled uncertainly at the opposite end of the walkway around the glow of a few lanterns. They had obviously followed Kouga's trail here and had no idea what to do.

They stirred and began to chatter loudly as she emerged and came towards them. A few of them, guards in full armor, stepped forward to the head of the group. Kagome frowned, wondering at the lack of loyalty that had kept them from charging in to defend their Tennō from the threat.

"Everything is fine. There was merely a…misunderstanding of sorts," Kagome called, preempting the blustering excuses she could see the guards preparing to give. "I need two servants to come with me. One will lead our noble guest to an available room befitting his status.”

“The other will take the guard inside who was…incapacitated in the midst of the confusion back to his quarters to rest and be tended to."

Kagome felt a little uncertain giving out orders as if she had any authority, but annoyance with the crowd lent her voice strength. No one questioned her, either out of due shame for their lack of action or because of the automatic authority that coming out of the Tennō's chambers lent her.

Two of the braver servants stepped forward and followed her back into the tensely silent room as the rest of the group dispersed. One, the man of the two, went hurriedly to the side of the fallen guard, hefting the other man up and hauling him from the room.

The other, a small but sturdy looking older woman, trailed after Kagome all the way over to the now petulant looking wolf Lord. Inuyasha, in anticipation of the entry of the servants, had gone to fume silently behind the screen.

Kagome was grateful to find that no blood seemed to have been shed in her absence. She bowed to Kouga and gestured to the servant woman, who bowed low, as well.

"Kouga-sama, she will lead you to your chambers. Simply follow her and you can get settled in for the night."

"What about you, Kagome?" he asked, rising to clasp her hands tightly in his own.

Kagome took a deep breath to gather her patience, glancing warily at the screen to make certain that Inuyasha did not try anything. She shifted her gaze back to Kouga, slipping her hands out of his grasp.

"I have to remain and finish my business with the Tennō-sama," she explained, and saw Kouga bristle exactly as she had expected. "But it would trouble me greatly if you were to remain and be bored by the tedious matters that we have to discuss. So, please, just go to your room and get a good night's rest. For my sake."

Kouga hesitated for a long moment, torn between the instinct to please Kagome and the desire to irritate Inuyasha. At length he nodded slowly.

"Fine. But if he tries anything, just come get me and I'll fix him, Tennō or whatever. And you'll come see me in the morning. We'll eat together."

"I will…see what I can do about that."

Kouga nodded and, to her great dismay, swept her into his arms for a parting embrace. Kagome squeezed her eyes shut in mortification, hoping it would end quickly. She could feel Inuyasha's eyes burning holes in her even through the screen.

Of course, it actually proved to be quite the lingering embrace as Kouga sniffed her and held her purposefully close in order to get in his parting shots. Through her intense embarrassment and growing desire to sink through the floor, she admired Inuyasha's restraint in not tearing the wolf to shreds.

Eventually he released her and followed the servant woman, who had thankfully kept herself busy tending to the cluttered room while she waited, out, though not before throwing a smug smirk at the outline of the fuming Inuyasha.

Kagome breathed a sigh of relief, grateful to have gotten through that tricky situation with minimal harm done. Mentally she patted herself on the back for having executed all of Kaede’s lessons in tact so very well.

"Oi, wench. Care to explain to me what in the seven hells you just did? Besides throwing yourself at the flea-bitten wolf like some fawning moron."

Kagome deflated, reminded that she still had some explaining to do if all were to go through as she hoped. With a mental sigh she turned to kneel down before the screen. Inuyasha came to stand beside it, arms crossed over his chest as he glared darkly down at her.

"First of all, I was hardly fawning over him, Inuyasha-sama-"

"Like hell," Inuyasha snorted. "You were all over him. I saw how you jumped straight into his scrawny arms! Is that the sort of thing you’re into?"

"I did not-!"

But Inuyasha merely huffed loudly over her attempts at explanation, turning up his nose. Kagome glared hard at his stubborn profile, but sighed at length.

He was obviously frustrated over everything that had occurred, and it was not as if he didn't have the right to be. After all, Kouga had broken into his court, insulted him repeatedly, attempted to abduct her, and the hanyou was still forced to allow him to stay without punishment.

"Regardless of what I did or did not do with Kouga-sama, do you understand my purpose in asking him to stay in the court?" she asked, hoping to set aside the rest of it for the moment.

"So that you can slobber all over him some more?"

"Inuyasha-sama!"

"What?! It's true, ain't it!"

He turned a glower on her that she gave right back to him, neither budging in the least. At length Kagome bit her lip, forcefully swallowing her pride. They needed to talk this through if he was to understand.

"Listen, Inuyasha-sama. I think it very important that he remain here in the court," Kagome said at last, collecting herself through sheer force of will.

"…Why?" Inuyasha asked, seeming to relent for the moment.

"I do not know how connected to or separate from the court he might be, but Kouga-sama is a Lord. More importantly than that, he is a Lord with a substantial number of youkai under his control. I have seen that much with my own eyes. And so I believe Kouga-sama and his clan could prove to be valuable supporters in our cause," Kagome explained.

"And you really think shit-for-brains is gonna listen to anything I say?" Inuyasha returned archly.

"Ah, well…" Kagome faltered, coming to the snag in her plan. "Hopefully during the time he will be here in the court, I can convince him to be more cooperative. He seems to…have a soft spot for me of sorts."

Inuyasha snorted derisively, his irritation flaring back up full force at the mention.

"So, what? You're gonna offer your body up to him in exchange for obedience? Thanks, but I’ll fucking pass on having any part in that shit.”

He turned his head dismissively, glaring at the far wall.

Kagome gasped, her face heating in indignation at the suggestion. She stood to face him, her fists balling tightly. How dare he!

"I will do what I have to do to secure your position, as I said I would!" Kagome snapped. "But I won't stand to be insulted when all I've tried to do is help you! Now if we are finished, may I retire for the night, Inuyasha-sama?"

"Feh. Whatever, go," Inuyasha tossed off callously, though inwardly he winced. She really sounded pissed this time…but she was the one who had forced him to allow that mangy wolf to stay in the court even after all the shit he had stirred up!

"Good night then, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome bit out, spinning on her heel to go.

Kagome took her leave quickly, fuming as she made her way out of the Inner Palace. She made her way back to Sango's residence and the room that had been prepared for her.

She found that Sango had already retired for the night and that Miroku had remained at his own residence. She was thankful, considering that it meant she could get a night's rest before having to explain all of what had gone on.

Huffily she changed into a light sleeping yukata and laid down, though sleep was not quick in coming. All she had been trying to do was help him, and he had all but accused her of being some kind of harlot! Really, it was too much…

At length she drifted into a fitful sleep, nursing her wounded pride.

* * *

Kagome awoke early the following morning, rested but not particularly refreshed. She recalled telling Kouga that she would try to visit him in the morning and decided it would be best to follow through with that, if only to prevent him from storming the court once more in search of her.

Kagome summoned a servant who helped her to prepare, washing and rewrapping her shoulder as well. As the elderly servant woman was brushing out her hair and retying it, Kagome wrote a quick note to Miroku and Sango explaining all that had gone on with Inuyasha. That way neither of them would have to bother with looking for her once they awoke.

The servant woman then went out to speak with a few other servants as to where exactly Kouga had ended up being placed for the night. It turned out to be a small residence near the Inner Palace, previously inhabited by a clan that had fallen into disgrace and that was now vacant. The woman led Kagome to it.

Kagome paused to take a deep breath at the entrance to Kouga's temporary room, preparing herself to deal with any of the number of outrageous things the wolf Lord might do or say. She needed to walk the fine line between staying in his favor and not leading him on if things were to work out as she hoped.

Resolution firm, Kagome stepped into the room. She nearly fell over at the sight that greeted her.

Somehow he had managed to get a hold of several heavy furs, which he had draped over the walls and scattered all over the wooden floors. To introduce light into the darkened room, he had built up a fire in the central fire pit of the room.

The lack of any ventilation left the room positively sweltering, and Kagome would have said she was right back in the cave on Kouga's lands had she not known better. Choking slightly on the heavy smoke hanging in the air, Kagome ventured further into the room.

Kouga, reclining lazily beside the dancing flames, sprang up at the sight of her. He was beside her in a flash, taking her hands and pulling her forward into the room. He rambled energetically about something Kagome could not quite follow, stunned as she still was by the drastic alterations made to the room.

He sat her forcefully down beside the fire, taking a seat so close to her that his thigh pressed against hers. Kagome scooted back nervously, only to be mirrored by Kouga. Obviously he had very little sense for human boundaries.

"I hope…your night was a pleasant one, Kouga-sama," Kagome said, uncomfortable with the serious, fixed look the wolf Lord was directing at her.

"It was alright," Kouga said dismissively, his intensely blue eyes never straying from her. "Once I had the servants fix the room up, anyway. I would rather have been closer to my woman, though."

And he was leaning towards her once more. Kagome scrabbled back desperately, jumping up at last and walking away from the fire.

She pretended to examine one of the furs closely to cover her jumpiness, absently tugging at the collar of her robes as she felt beads of sweat begin to collect at the nape of her neck.

"I wonder where the servants managed to find these," she chattered pointlessly, fingering the fur in exaggerated contemplation.

She could feel it as the wolf came up behind her and she had to fight not to flinch as his clawed hand came to rest on her shoulder. He was so close she could feel his warmth against her back.

"Kagome, I get it. I know why you asked me to stay here in the court."

Kagome pulled a face at what was supposed to be the suggestive undertone in his voice. Of course she should have expected that he would make whatever he wanted out of her proposal to have him remain in the capital. She turned carefully to face him, her expression guarded.

"And what exactly do you understand, Kouga-sama?" she asked, edging her tone with a stiff formality that she hoped would cool his ardor.

"I, uh…I know that you wanted me here to save you, of course," Kouga faltered, confused by the sudden shift. “You want me to save you from dog-breath so that you can be my woman. I mean, you couldn't say it in front of him 'cuz he's the Tennō and all that shit, but this way I can save you like you wanted."

"And how did you come to that conclusion, Kouga-sama?" Kagome returned levelly.

"I…uh…well," Kouga groped for words, but suddenly could not follow the line of logic that had led him to his conclusion. "It's just…obvious, right?"

Kagome eyed him, noting the uncharacteristic uncertainty in his expression. As trying as he might be, his feelings for her seemed strangely sincere. She pulled back a bit, softening her demeanor and distractedly fanning herself with one hand.

"Please listen very carefully to what I have to say, Kouga-sama," she said with gentle firmness. "I did not ask you to stay here in order to save me. I asked you to stay because there is something I am trying to achieve here in the court, and I believe you can help me to do it.”

“In regards to...your feelings for me, I can not honestly say that I return them. Nor can I say that I will be in any position to return those feelings any time in the near future.”

“I am truly sorry if I have given you the wrong impression, and you are free to leave at any time if that is your wish. However, I would be deeply grateful if you would remain."

Kouga stared at her for a long moment, his face blank as if he could not comprehend. And then something seemed to sink behind his eyes, and he half-reached for her before drawing his hand back.

He looked more than a little confused and hurt. It tugged at Kagome's heart terribly, and she had to bite back conciliatory words that might lessen what she was trying to convey.

"So you…don't want to be my woman?" he asked at length, his eyes searching hers.

"I am sorry, Kouga-sama," Kagome said softly, lowering her gaze to the fur covered floor.

"It's because of dog-face, isn't it?" Kouga said with a hint of accusation. "You're in love with him, right?"

"What? No! Of course not!" Kagome said, her eyes widening they snapped back up to meet his. “Where did you even get such an idea?”

The very thought of it was ludicrous. Not only was Inuyasha the Tennō, but beyond that the two of them could scarcely be near one another without him deciding to pick a fight with her!

"Good."

Kagome blinked, as surprised by the word as by the cocky tone in which it was tossed out. A confident grin was splitting Kouga's face from ear to ear, fangs glinting in the light of the fire. Kagome's heart sank and she wondered where she had slipped up this time.

"If there's no reason why not, then I'm definitely going to make you my woman," Kouga declared. "You'll see, Kagome. You'll be my mate within a week. Definitely!"

Without further warning he swept her up into his arms, clasping her tightly to himself. Kagome froze within his arms, so stunned by his boundless self-assurance and how little he had actually listened to what she had said that she could not move.

At the edge of her line of vision Kagome caught some kind of movement and quickly refocused her eyes. There in the entryway stood a servant, a younger, pretty sort of girl. Her eyes were white all the way around as she gaped at them, her mouth hanging open in a most improper manner.

Kagome jerked, fairly shoving Kouga away from herself. He looked as if he would protest, but Kagome spun him around to see their unexpected visitor. Still he did not seem to feel much other than annoyance, turning a surly look on the accidental interloper.

"Ah, um…I-I'm sorry to have interrupted you two while you were….But the Tennō-sama has requested that you be brought to his Majesty immediately," the servant girl stuttered, her cheeks flushed at the intimate display she had witnessed.

She gave a quick, awkward bow and Kagome hurried over to her side, casting Kouga a sharp look on her way. She put a hand on the girl's shoulder.

"It's alright. It's just a misunderstanding, that's all. A misunderstanding," Kagome offered lamely, and the girl stared uncertainly at her. "Ummm…how about you just take me to the Tennō-sama now, alright?"

"You and Kouga-sama don't need to finish?" the girl questioned, brows arched with all the impertinence of youth.

There was something sharp behind the girl's dark eyes and Kagome felt a brief flash of concern.

"Yeah, actually, me and my woman-"

"There's nothing to be finished," Kagome cut the wolf Lord off sharply, shooting him a silencing look. "I have to go meet with Tennō-sama now, Kouga-sama. I am sorry to cut our _conversation_ short, but his Majesty's orders take precedence."

Kouga looked as if he might argue or say something derogatory about Inuyasha, but Kagome kept him pinned with a stern stare. Luckily he seemed for once to understand her meaning and settled for a sullen scowl, huffing out a sigh as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Then I will take my leave," Kagome said, more in hopes of getting the servant girl moving than anything else.

The girl took the hint reluctantly, leaving off her covert glances between the wolf Lord and the miko in favor of turning to go. Kagome offered Kouga a nod and a hint of a smile as thanks for his small show of tact.

Kouga returned the gesture with a beaming grin, as if he had done something particularly wonderful. Kagome turned to follow the servant, rolling her eyes.

"Don't forget what I said, Kagome!" he called after her, and she tensed. "I'm not kidding about making you my woman! I'll come see you later!"

Kagome's insides turned to stone at the scandalized look the young servant girl shot her. Determinedly she ignored him and forced her feet to continue moving forward down the long halls, her face pointedly blank. The servant girl continued to shuffle along ahead of her, but kept her eyes trained unwaveringly on Kagome.

"Kouga-sama is joking, of course. He has…a unique sense of humor," Kagome said to her, her tone as light as she could force it to be.

"I'm certain, Kagome-sama," the girl replied, sounding quite the opposite.

They reached the entrance to the residence and both slipped their shoes back on before exiting. They walked the paths to the Inner Palace in silence, encountering few other courtiers as it was still very early.

For that matter, the sun was just beginning to fully illuminate the morning sky. Kagome realized that she could not have been with Kouga-sama for very long despite how it had felt, and quick on the tail of that thought it occurred to her how much more suspicious it must have seemed to find her in the youkai's chambers so early.

Mentally Kagome squirmed, wondering how she could have been stupid enough to put herself in such a position. She had not been thinking at all.

She also could not help but wonder why Inuyasha would summon her so early in the day. They had parted on rocky terms the previous night, and it was hard to believe that he would be eager to see her again so soon. Perhaps he wished to continue degrading her despite her best efforts…

Distracted by her musings, Kagome nearly tripped over a great white crane lying on the path before she realized she was almost to Inuyasha's chambers. The crane gave her a look that she could only interpret as annoyance as she stepped apologetically over it, following the servant girl up the steps and through the Shishinsen.

The snow had ceased to fall sometime during the night, but the chill was still sharp in the air and the large pond over which the walkway to the Tennō's chambers was built was blanketed in a layer of frost. Kagome wondered if it were sturdy enough to slide around on, as she had once done in her village when she was little.

She hesitated at the entrance to the chamber, glancing at the servant girl as she stood waiting for Kagome to enter. Kagome opened her mouth, considering asking the girl to keep quiet about the things she had witnessed and heard in Kouga's room.

But it would seem as if she truly had something to hide were she to say that. And the servants here in the capital all seemed to be very kind and well-mannered people. It was unlikely that they would be prone to gossip or rumor-mongering.

"Umm…Good-bye," Kagome said, as she had been staring at the girl too long to say nothing at all.

"Good-bye," the girl replied shortly, looking anxious to be off.

Kagome nodded and entered the chamber. She could hear the girl scamper off like an excited rabbit the moment she was inside.

It was pleasant inside the chamber, the warmth of a fire that was now merely embers held inside the room. Kagome rubbed her hands together to take the chill from them. The screen was back up once more and the room had been cleaned of all of the scattered feathers, paper, and snow.

Vaguely Kagome could see the outline of Inuyasha reclining behind the slatted screen. She frowned and took a seat on a cushion before it, waiting warily to be addressed.

"Took you long enough."

"I came as soon as the servant summoned me," Kagome returned, lips twitching in irritation.

"Feh. Just get here faster next time."

"…Is there a reason you summoned me here so early?" she bit out, hand clenching where they rested atop her thighs.

"I…"

There was a long pause. A very long pause. A pause that just kept on stretching and stretching and stretching awkwardly along.

"Inuyasha-sama?" Kagome said at length.

"I summoned you because…because I…I _do_ have a reason, y'know!" Inuyasha snapped. "I summoned you 'cuz… _shit_ …."

"Do you not have a reason for calling me here?" Kagome said incredulously.

"I-no!…That wolf!" Inuyasha stuttered, mentally kicking himself for not having thought up anything to tell her. Of course she would ask for some sort reason!

Kagome paused for a moment, taking in what he had said. "You do not mean…? You did not do it just to get me away from Kouga-sama, did you?"

There was that exaggerated pause again. Kagome bit down on her tongue so hard she thought it might come off, desperately holding back the torrent of disrespectful words that wanted to pour forth. The thought of tipping the screen over on him even flashed briefly across her mind.

"Inuyasha-sama," she began with terrible patience. "You-!"

"What?! I ain't gonna have that wolf slobbering all over you in _my_ capital! He's got no fucking right!" Inuyasha fumed, rising to stand behind the screen.

"I tried to explain to you why Kouga-sama is here!" Kagome cried. "I tried to explain that all I'm trying to do is help you, and you-!"

"Pardon me, my Lord."

Both turned at the sound of a third voice in the room. In the entryway stood Kikyou, her expression more stony than Kagome had ever seen it. Kagome flushed hotly, her mouth snapping shut. She wondered how long the woman had been standing there.

"Kikyou? What're you doing here?" asked Inuyasha, sounding as if his thoughts ran along the same line.

"Conveniently enough, I was coming to request that you call Kagome here so that she might begin her duties as my lady-in-waiting," Kikyou replied, barely sparing her a glance as she went to stand behind the screen at Inuyasha's side. "I am sorry to have interrupted your…discussion, my Lord."

"You didn't," said Inuyasha, and Kagome saw his outline reach up to clasp the hand Kikyou proffered to him. "It was over, anyway."

"Ah, I see," Kikyou replied softly, the barest hint of satisfaction in her voice. "Then you do not mind if I take the girl with me now? There is much to be done."

"Go ahead. I don't care."

Kagome flinched, stung at the abrupt dismissal. He suddenly seemed so... distant. She wondered at the sudden shift.

"Thank you, my Lord. I will take my leave with her," Kikyou said, pressing his hand lightly before stepping out from behind the screen. "Will you be dining with me tonight, my Lord? I have missed your company these past few evenings."

"Yeah, sure," Inuyasha replied.

"Good. I will look forward to it," Kikyou said, and there was a brief flash if softness in her face.

The future Empress stepped regally to the entryway, her blue and white juni-hito trailing gracefully behind her. She paused, turning back to Kagome and raising a delicate brow expectantly.

"Come, Kagome."

Kagome bristled at being called as one might call a dog, and defiantly remaining seated just a moment longer than necessary. The noblewoman met her gaze levelly, though something hard entered her eyes.

Kagome turned and bowed perfunctorily towards the screen before standing to leave.

"I take my leave, Tennō-sama," she said stiffly.

That said, she turned to trail after the future Empress.

"Oi, Kagome!"

The miko turned at the call, surprised. Kikyou turned back, as well. The hanyou hesitated.

"Never mind. Just go," Inuyasha huffed.

Feeling slightly disappointed, Kagome bowed once more and turned to continue after Kikyou.

Inuyasha flopped back down onto the nearest cushions, absently reaching out to shred one with his claws. Annoyance buzzed lightly throughout his limbs, urging him to get up and move.

He had a meeting with the Council of State soon, however, and could not afford to go far. They were going to discuss…the allocation of funds towards the reconstruction of properties damaged by rampant youkai. Or some shit like that.

The hanyou groaned as he recalled. That must be why he was so annoyed. He was not looking forward to that lot of wrinkled, rambling old men trying to trick him again.

That was it. It had nothing whatsoever to do with that fool girl and her moronic wolf. Not at all.

Inuyasha rolled over, resigning himself to lay there until he was summoned to the meeting. For a moment he allowed his eyes to fall shut, and waiting there in the darkness behind his closed lids was the disgusting specter of the drooling wolf looming over that wide-eyed idiot of a woman.

He growled, banging his head lightly against the floor.

* * *

"Kagome."

She raised her head from where she was hunched over on the wooden floor, craning her neck around to face her caller. Kikyou knelt primly nearby on a sitting mat just behind the line of an open shoji screen, surveying her coolly from a distance.

Kagome turned back, picking up her rag and continuing to scrub the floor of the hallway. She paused, pushing a few stray hairs back from her face with a grimy hand.

"Yes, Fujiwara-sama?" she replied to the call at length, addressing the floor far more than the woman.

"There are some issues that need be addressed."

"Would you like me to continue cleaning while we speak?" Kagome asked, unable to keep from being a bit pert after all that she had been put through.

Kikyou had led her in chilly silence to her chambers on the eastern edge of the Inner Palace, which was no more than Kagome had expected. She had also expected the future Empress' quarters to be large and lavish, which they proved to be. They were basically the twin of Inuyasha's own residence on a slightly smaller scale.

What Kagome had not expected was what came next.

She was not overly knowledgeable on the matter, but even she knew the general duties of a lady-in-waiting. A lady-in-waiting was to follow her mistress and take care of any personal requirements she might have, such as helping with bathing, grooming, or wardrobe.

Upon their arrival at the residence, Kikyou had asked her to do none of these things. Rather she had stopped the first servant they encountered and instructed him to bring a pail of water and several rags.

The servant had done so speedily and without question. Kikyou had then instructed him to tell the servants that they may do as they pleased for the next until she summoned them back.

The man had stood for a few moments, confused, before the slightest raising of one of Kikyou's fine brows had sent him scampering off to do as he was told.

Obviously the future Empress was not one to be lenient if crossed.

And thus they had come to this, Kikyou sipping a steaming mug of tea as she watched Kagome scrub her way up and down the extensive hall. Only about ten more hallways to go, Kagome thought dismally. She wondered if Kikyou intended to have her clean the rooms, as well.

"No, you may continue to clean as I speak," Kikyou said, catching her small bit of insolence and choosing to ignore it.

"As you wish, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome muttered, re-wetting her rag from the wooden pail and scrubbing hard at the floor.

It was frustrating. It was so frustrating that she thought she might begin to tear her hair out soon. What right or reason did this woman have to ridicule her in this manner?

"Good, then," said Kikyou. "I will start with the obvious. You are wondering, I am certain, why I am using you to do the job of my servants."

"The thought had crossed my mind, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome replied archly.

"And am I correct in assuming you believe my intent to be malicious?" Kikyou said softly, watching her intently as she scrubbed at a spot.

The village girl had an abundance of spirit, if absolutely nothing else.

"I…gave no thought to your intent," Kagome lied.

Of course she had assumed that Kikyou was trying to upset her. Perhaps even trying to make her so angry that she would snap and give the future Empress an excuse to send her home. Kikyou had never made any secret of her opinion about Kagome's presence in the court, after all.

"I see," said Kikyou, unconvinced. "Nonetheless, I wish to clarify matters. I do not do harbor any ill will towards you."

Kagome paused in her work, turning slightly to glance at the future Empress from the corner of her eye. Kikyou’s eyes still had that look of carefully cultivated distance, but she did not seem to be insincere. Then again, Kikyou, while not at all a pleasant person in Kagome’s esteem, somehow did not seem the type to lie.

"Ill will," Kikyou continued. "Would, after all, imply that I was concerned enough with you to wish for your unhappiness. Quite frankly, you do not matter enough to me to warrant my feeling one way or another about you.”

“That is what I intend to remind you of. You are not an exception, despite how you may have been treated up until this point. You are of common birth, Kagome. By the will of the kami you were placed beneath the nobility, meant to serve. Close associations between us are impossible. It would upset the very order of things.”

“Now, I am not ordering you to leave the court. You have fought fairly for the right to remain here. But do not expect me, nor anyone else, to treat you as if you belong here. Do not expect to find much in the way of happiness."

Kagome came to a slow halt in the midst of her work, the rag slipping from her grasp as she straightened up. She turned to face Kikyou, something cold beginning to creep into her chest. Yet still there was not the smallest trace of animosity anywhere in the noblewoman's countenance.

Kagome's heart seemed to sink down through the polished wooden floors. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you seem to have forgotten it, or perhaps never to have understood the truth of things here to begin with," Kikyou answered simply, her dark eyes unwavering. "It is the truth. Order must be maintained in this court and throughout this country, and to maintain it everyone must know their own place in it.”

“I believe that the seeming favor that Tachibana Sango and the Houshi have shown you has led you to believe that you are somehow on a level with the rest of us, to be treated as an equal. The…odd attention that my Lord has shown you has not helped, either."

Kagome looked up at the strange note of hesitation in Kikyou's voice. But the noblewoman was no longer looking at her as she had managed to do so steadily up until that point.

"I will not pretend to understand his unusual concern with you. But I will inform you that it is a passing thing, not to be taken seriously in any manner," Kikyou said, a hard note finally entering her words. "As is, I am certain, whatever interest Tachibana Sango and the Houshi have shown. Ultimately they know their places. You must remember yours."

Kagome stared at the woman, an odd numbness overtaking her. She was at a loss in the face of such cold certainty.

And it was a truth that the village girl had allowed herself to lose sight of in the midst of everything. She was not like these people. She was common born and was to be treated as such.

She had come into the court anticipating harsh treatment and had been thrown off by Miroku and Sango’s kindness. And even Inuyasha’s gruff familiarity had set her at ease, tricked her into believing that he was a person no different from herself.

But he was not a person like her. He had all but told her as much during their last two meetings, with his casual dismissals of her efforts with Kouga. And she, fool girl with a muddled head that she was, had had the insolence argue and feel slighted when he was merely treating her as he had every right to. As a servant, not a friend.

Truly she could have no friends here, however kind Miroku and Sango might be. They were not of a kind. Close association was not possible. By the kami, she had been a fool.

She pressed a hand to her stomach, feeling sick and sad and hollow. But she had known to expect this, Kagome reminded herself forcefully. She had not come in blind.

"Of course…you are correct, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome managed at last, dropping back down and grabbing her rag. "I forgot myself. I apologize. It…will not happen again."

There was a long pause from the woman behind Kagome, though she was beyond caring about a response. She just wanted to finish cleaning and go somewhere she could be alone. Somewhere she could begin to sort through the tangle of her muddled feelings.

"As long as you understand, there is no harm done," Kikyou said quietly. "Finish cleaning two more halls and then you may retire to your new room in the southern quarter of the residence. You will know it when you see it- it will be the only spare room in the quarter.”

“I will call to have your things brought there. Your day will begin again when I summon you tomorrow. These cleanings will be a regular activity, to serve as a reminder of what we have discussed today…Things will be much easier for you, Kagome, so long as you keep all of this in mind. You should not suffer unduly."

With that Kagome heard the shoji door slide shut with a delicate yet resounding clack, signaling Kikyou's departure. She continued to scrub dutifully, focusing doggedly on the slide of the rag over the floor.

Back and forth, back and forth, re-wet, wring out, and start again. And again. And again. How long it went on Kagome did not know.

At length she realized she had reached the end of the final hall. She blinked several times, disoriented, before realizing she was done. She rose stiffly, her joints protesting at the sudden shift in position, and went out into the garden to dump the dirty water.

She sought out the servants' quarters and placed the bucket and rag there to be dealt with later. She then began the task of searching out the southern quarter of the residence.

Heading in a southern direction was not particularly difficult, but for the many buildings with countless winding hallways. The residence had to be at least three times the size of Sango's and far more empty.

At length she found the quarter, and a bit more wandering through the halls led her to the only unadorned room. It was of a good size, larger even than the one Kagome had been given in Sango's residence.

Strangely enough, a futon had been laid out already, and a mug of tea sat steaming beside it. Kagome sat down on the futon, taking the mug in both hands and letting its warmth flow through her finger tips.

She had thought that all the servants were still out. The only one in the residence who knew this was her room should have been Kikyou…

But even the thought of that was ridiculous. Kagome took a sip from the mug, but the familiar flavor did not hold its usual comfort. She was exhausted, physically and mentally. And she was more alone than she had ever been before. Though perhaps she had been alone all along and had merely failed to realize it.

Kagome cringed, mortification twisting her innards sickeningly. She had presumed so much. She had lost sight of herself and her surroundings. Sango and Miroku were not her friends. Inuyasha was not her friend. They had tolerated her and she had taken advantage.

At least Kikyou had brought her back to her senses, she thought bitterly. Otherwise she might have continued on blindly in her foolishness, shaming the kami themselves with her behavior.

No, she was on her own here in the court. She would serve respectfully and dutifully, carrying forward with her purpose as much as she could. But never again would she forget.

Kagome set the still-steaming mug aside, finding herself unable to force any more down. She just wanted to go to sleep.

She flopped back on the futon, curling in on herself. Without bothering to pull the covers up or even change clothes, Kagome closed her eyes and dozed off.

* * *

"Kagome-san! Kagome-san! You need to get up now. Fujiwara-sama requires your assistance."

Kagome groaned, rolling over as a gentle hand shook her shoulder. Cracking one eye open just slightly, she could see daylight peeking into the room, as well as the vague outline of a woman leaning over her.

She forced herself to sit up, wondering dazedly what time it was. The woman gave her a sympathetic smile as she covered a jaw-wrenching yawn.

"Sorry to get you up so early, dear," she said. "I know you're probably still tired from all the cleaning yesterday. But our Ladyship has early morning tea with one of the other noblewomen, and she needs you to help her prepare. So rise and shine. C'mon, I'll help you."

The woman helped Kagome to stand, offering her a rough yukata to change into. She did so, laying her dirty robes out on the futon to be taken care of later. She decided to forgo changing the bandages on her shoulder, as she needed to hurry to help Kikyou. The wound seemed to be healing properly.

The servant woman showed her to a well just out behind her quarters, and Kagome pulled water up from it to wash her face and hands. The woman offered her a leather tie, and Kagome pulled her hair back into a long tail.

"Well, don't you look just like one of us," remarked the woman, Takiko, as she surveyed her appearance. She did not sound particularly pleased.

"It is how I am supposed to look," Kagome said, not looking at her. "We should probably go to Fujiwara-sama now, or she might be cross."

Takiko nodded, but turned to face the girl as they started off towards the main quarter where Kikyou was housed.

"You know, Kagome-san, Fujiwara-sama really doesn't have any bad feelings towards you, I think," Takiko chattered. "She just…likes everything in its place. She believes very much in order. And she is terribly straightforward, which makes her a bit…hard to deal with. But she has her reasons."

"And what reasons would those be?" Kagome asked, recalling Inuyasha offering a similar defense for the woman.

"Her Ladyship's family…" Takiko began, and then hesitated. "Never mind. If it something Fujiwara-sama wishes you to know, she will be the one to tell you. It is not my place to be running around gossiping. Just…please try to be understanding with her."

Kagome was silent. While she understood that Kikyou had merely spoken the truth, it was still hard for her to think very fondly of the woman who had made things so difficult for her since their first meeting.

They reached the entrance to Kikyou's chambers. Takiko took her leave. Kagome knelt down before the shoji door and slid it open as Kaede had once taught her to do. She bowed in the open doorway before entering, turning back to kneel on the tatami mats and slide the shoji shut.

"Good, you are here," said Kikyou, kneeling before an ornate dressing mirror. "Please fetch a juni-hito from my trunk. Preferably one with…a firmer sort of look to it."

Kagome frowned, wondering at the odd request. Something 'firm' to meet a guest in? Still she rose without question and went to the large trunk in the corner of the room, opening it to rifle through its contents.

"Is this one suitable, Fujiwara-sama?" Kagome asked, holding up a deep red and black one with winding dragons patterned on it.

"That one will do," Kikyou said, glancing at its reflection in her mirror. "Come help me to put it on."

Kagome did so, and Kikyou stood as she helped her remove her sleeping yukata. Kagome started slipping the first several layers onto her slim, pale frame. She arranged them very carefully so that they would drape correctly before sliding the top layers over them.

At last she tied the waist and slipped the karaginu over everything. Kikyou stepped back to survey her work in the mirror, giving a small nod of approval.

"I prefer no to wear any powder. Fetch a few combs to pull my hair back," Kikyou instructed. "There is a box on the table filled with them."

Kagome went to the large, low table on the left side of the room, taking from it a glossy black box. She returned to Kikyou's side with it, removing the lid and sifting through the many combs to find a fitting set.

She found two painted gold ones with spines carved in the delicate form of dragonflies. Deciding that they would do, she began to comb slowly through Kikyou's mass of dark hair. There were very few tangles, she noted with a tiny pang of envy.

"You are looking more humble today, Kagome," commented Kikyou, watching the girl in the mirror as she worked quietly.

"I have…remembered my place, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome answered, tensing. She focused on combing steadily through Kikyou's hair, refusing to meet the woman's eyes.

"Good," Kikyou returned. "I can not promise that you will be happier, but you will certainly be more at ease. There is a certain comfort in not fighting your fate, you will find."

Kagome glanced briefly up at the woman's face reflected in the glass, surprised at the familiarity with which she spoke about such things. But Kikyou's eyes were unreadable. Well enough, Kagome supposed, as it was not a topic she particularly wanted to delve into with this woman again.

"If it is not too impertinent of me, may I ask with whom you are having tea, Fujiwara-sama?" Kagome said, more to change the subject than anything.

"Merely a noblewoman from the Taira clan," Kikyou replied vaguely.

There was something resigned in the set of her mouth. It sounded somehow more like a chore than a social engagement, Kagome reflected silently.

She swept the sides of Kikyou's hair back with the combs, twisting it in the back and leaving the other half of her hair down. It turned out rather nice looking, surprisingly enough.

Kikyou turned her head slightly this way and that, examining her reflection . A small nod conveyed her acceptance of it.

"I will summon you again when I am finished. Until then, seek out one of the servants and ask them for work to keep you occupied," the future Empress ordered.

With that Kikyou rose and gracefully slid the shoji screen open, sliding it closed behind her once more.

Tittering laughter just outside the screen caught her attention a few moments after the noblewoman's departure. Kagome rose, going to the screen and opening it. The group of women just outside froze, but quickly resumed their chattering when they saw that Kagome appeared to be just another servant.

"What's going on?" Kagome said, noting the mischievous looks all around.

"Our Ladyship is having tea with that Taira woman again," snickered one of the girls conspiratorially. "It's always amusing to see Fujiwara-sama get a little flustered. She's usually such a cold fish."

The group broke into a fit of giggles again. Suddenly a hand shot out to grab Kagome's wrist. She squeaked as she found herself being tugged along rapidly behind the now-moving group.

"Come on. Come watch with us."

Kagome did not argue as she was pulled along, curious as she was to see this Taira woman who was supposedly capable of irking the unflappable future Empress. 

Nor was it bad to be accepted so easily among a group of people who seemed to see her as an equal. She would simply watch for a moment and then go to find work as Kikyou had instructed.

The group came to a halt in front of another shoji, this one tucked away in a dark corner of the main house. A girl slid the screen open just the smallest bit, and the rest of the group swarmed around to get a peek. Kagome managed to find a spot and peered in to look, as well.

It was obviously the tea room, as all of the implements of the tea ceremony were inside and there was no table, but rather only cushions on which to kneel. Ornate ink paintings and several scrolls adorned the walls. Currently two women knelt across from one another, two bowls of tea sitting before them.

One of the women was Kikyou, her posture seeming more stiff than refined at the moment. The other had to be the Taira woman everyone was buzzing about, Kagome surmised.

She was beautiful, in a wild sort of way. Her smirking, full lips were painted a deep shade of crimson, matching exactly the color of her sharp eyes. Her dark hair was arranged rather carelessly on her head, a feather hanging from the tie that held it. Beads of the finest jade dangled from her pointed ears, and she wore juni-hito of alternating white and maroon, patterned with butterflies.

As if her odd ears and eyes had not said it clearly enough, her aura reeked of youki in Kagome's spiritual sense. Particularly potent was the aura of the fan hanging from the woman's wrist.

Kagome felt she could understand why Kikyou had not seemed eager to attend this meeting. The woman looked as if she would drink blood as readily as tea.

"So, Kikyou-sama, how has our Majesty been these days?" the woman was drawling, her sharp eyes intent on Kikyou's face.

"His Majesty has been as well as ever, Kagura-sama," Kikyou replied succinctly, her eyes meeting the other woman's in silent challenge.

"Ah, is that so? Good. I was worried his Majesty might be feeling strained with all of the youkai attacks and the like," the woman, Kagura, remarked keenly.

There was a slight tightening of Kikyou's jaw. Kagura's smirk widened a fraction, like a predator scenting a weakness.

"I assure you that my Lord has been dealing quite well with all that is happening. His Majesty has everything perfectly under control," Kikyou returned firmly, her chin tilting slightly upward as if to command more respect from the other woman.

"Hmmm? What measures is his Majesty employing exactly, if you do not mind my asking?" prodded Kagura, obviously unimpressed.

"My Lord has...I am afraid that my Lord has asked me to keep his plans confidential for the time being," Kikyou stumbled slightly, raising her mug to take a painfully proper sip.

Kagura grinned outright now, her elongated eyeteeth glinting.

"Truly? How disappointing. But I suppose I must take your word. After all, his Majesty must be in a tolerably stable position if he can afford to have an Empress with so little clan backing."

Kagome saw Kikyou's pale hands spasm mometarily around her bowl of tea, the knuckles flashing white. One of the servant girls near her gasped softly. She frowned, not following what was going on at all.

"Oh, I am sorry, Kikyou-sama," Kagura said with exaggerated feeling, raising a hand to her lips. "That was horribly indelicate of me. But you know, everyone was so surprised when he decided to not to call off the betrothal. He must care a great deal for you."

"I would prefer to discuss other matters if possible, Kagura-sama," Kikyou forced out, and Kagome was surprised by her lack of tact. Whatever it was they were talking about had shaken the future Empress deeply.

"Ah, my apologies. I did not mean to upset you, Kikyou-sama. How about we discuss that new village girl in court, then, to get your mind off of it?"

Kikyou raised her eyes from the floor, scanning the other woman's face with mild suspicion at the abrupt shift. Kagome leaned in closer as she realized they were talking about her.

"Why would you wish to discuss her?" Kikyou questioned warily.

"Ah, well, I heard from a one of the servants just today that she had talked to a servant who had seen the girl proving herself to be every bit the backwoods hussy that we all suspected her to be.”

“Apparently she is playing bed-warmer to the wolf Lord visiting the court right now. She works fast, I must say. And after you and his Majesty went to all that trouble to have her brought in. How embarrassing it must be,” Kagura commented slyly.

Kagome froze, her breath catching in her throat. Her eyes went wide, her hands clenching where she clutched the edge of the shoji for support.

"I am hardly one to listen to rumors," Kikyou replied guardedly, wondering what the other noblewoman was driving at.

"Kikyou-sama, always so very proper," Kagura said, something biting hiding just beneath her words. "Besides, now that word has spread all across the court about it, it is hardly a rumor anymore. It is simply a fact.”

“I am sure that word of it must even have reached his Majesty by now. The Tennō-sama must be disappointed to learn he made such allowances only to be tricked by a mere harlot. But you have had dealings with her as well, I believe? Tell me, is she as low down as she seems?"

But Kagome could not bear to hear another word. Quietly she slunk away from the group. She slunk all the way back to her room in the southern quarter, where she dropped down onto her futon and sat very still.

Because of one small slip in judgment, the entire court now thought she was no better than a common whore. Miroku thought she was a whore. Sango thought she was a whore. Inuyasha had had all his suspicions of her loose nature confirmed. As if everyone in the court had not thought her disgusting before, now they could say that that feeling was justified.

There was no way that Inuyasha would allow her to remain in the court now. She would be sent home, her reputation irrevocably tarnished for the remainder of her life. She had failed before she had even truly begun. Her head spun.

Kagome lay there for a long time, watching the shadows crawl across her walls as the hours dragged by. She felt horribly disconnected, like one stuck in a nightmare.

There was a sharp clack as her shoji screen was tossed open.

"I told you to wait for me to summon you again, did I not, Kagome?"

It was Kikyou's voice. Kikyou was there. Kagome was almost surprised enough to move. Almost.

"Nothing to say for yourself?"

Kagome was silent.

"I learned from the servant girls that you were among the ones eavesdropping on my conversation with Kagura-sama."

Still Kagome said nothing, unable to summon up the energy to react or respond.

"I suppose you were not pleased with what you overheard."

There was the soft patter of feet on the wooden floor. Distantly Kagome felt a warm hand come to rest on her shoulder. Her eyes widened slightly and she wondered if Kikyou actually intended to try and comfort her.

"I would advise you to grow a thicker skin. If you remain as you are, you will be entirely useless."

With that the hand was gone and the footsteps retreated. Kagome was alone once more.

She passed a sleepless night, unable to pull herself out from the pit she had created.


	8. Of Fujiwaras and Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few terms that I’ll be using:
> 
> -Torii: the arch that leads to a Shintō temple. Not really an arch, though, as there is no real curve to the two planks of wood that sit at the top. More of a trapezoidal type of shape. Customarily red, though I've heard orange is pretty common as well.
> 
> Marks the point where one begins ascendancy into a higher state of mind. If you've ever seen an anime with a temple even remotely involved in it, you've probably seen a torii.
> 
> -Shimenawa: a rope with bits of zig-zagging paper and tassels attached to it. It is used to 'rope off' or mark a sacred place. It usually adorns the entryway of a temple, though it may also be tied around a tree or a rock or something like that.
> 
> -Mitsu tomoe: a symbol of the Shintō or Buddhist religions. Three (though often four, as well) 'flames', similar to the yin yang symbol, representing the play of the cosmic forces. A common tattoo among the constituents of both religions.

A long, gray week passed for Kagome following the incident with the Taira clanswoman. True to her word, Kikyou had her roused early every morning and promptly set her to scrubbing hallways and tending gardens.

When she finished such chores, Kagome was allowed to clean off a bit in the well behind her residence. After that she would eat and spend the remainder of the day tending to Kikyou.

She trailed after the future Empress in much the manner of a whipped dog, head bowed and eyes focused on the floor. Any small task that Kikyou might require of her was performed in heavy silence, without complaint. Aside from giving orders, the noblewoman rarely addressed her.

Neither said anything of the rumors surrounding Kagome or of the noblewoman's visit to her chambers. At times, though, Kagome would feel Kikyou's steady gaze on her, as if the older woman was right on the verge of addressing the issue.

Kagome was grateful that she never did. She did not think she could stand to be condemned by that calm, disinterested voice.

But the silence surrounding Kagome was fast becoming a deafening one. The servants at Kikyou's residence had not been long in learning that she was the girl of the rumors, and they had taken to avoiding her like one diseased whenever possible.

They would fall pointedly silent whenever she passed them in the halls, moving quickly out of her path as if the slightest contact might taint them. Kagome knew they must be talking about her quite a bit, but was strangely relieved that they chose to keep it behind her back.

Their silence, however, did not trouble her so much as her sudden disconnection from certain others. Miroku and Sango had not come to see her even once since she had been assigned to serve Kikyou. Not so much as a note had come to her from them in an entire week.

However much her heart railed against the thought, Kagome could only interpret this pointed absence as an attempt at severing all ties with her. Nobles and commoners could never truly be friends, after all, and they had to have heard the gossip about her and Kouga. Most likely they were suffering now because of their previous association with her.

Kagome writhed in her skin every time she thought about how much shame the rumors must have brought on the two people who had been so kind to her, friends or not. How terribly they must think of her and how much they must regret ever having been foolish enough to get involved with her.

Even Kouga himself seemed to want nothing to do with her any longer. He had made no attempts at contacting her. Kagome did not know what to account this to, other than that he might have found it too bothersome to pursue her if this was what came of it. Perhaps he had even gotten bored and simply left the capital.

Either way Kagome was the slightest bit grateful for his absence, despite what it might mean. Not that it seemed that the situation could get much worse, but his hovering around her would certainly not make things any better.

More troubling still was the utter absence of any word from the Tennō. He had not summoned her to his chamber even once since she had last spoken with him. She knew with awful certainty that he had caught wind of the rumor and could only imagine that this stony silence was merely the calm before the storm.

Soon enough he would surely work his way past his initial rage. When he could finally bear the sight of her again he would summon her and pass his judgment, casting her out of his court in disgrace.

The thought of such disdain from him was one that Kagome tried not to entertain for very long, as it stung more sharply than almost anything else. She had just been starting to earn a little bit of his trust, and now he must feel disgusted over ever having gone to all that effort for her. Perhaps he truly would give up on everything now, and she would be the cause of it.

Several times Kagome had considered trying to go to him, trying to address the entire court, in order to clear up the whole outrageous misunderstanding. The harsh reality, however, was that her word was worth nothing here.

She had no clan to support her. She could have no friends to speak on her behalf. She did not even have a witness to attest to what had gone on, besides the servant girl who had started the whole rumor in the first place.

Besides that, there was the truth that she had done something foolish. As a young unmarried woman, she had no business being in a man's chambers alone at such an hour. Even in her small village such a thing would be considered poor conduct.

But Kagome had been so focused on her goal of gaining Kouga's support that she had not stopped to think things through properly. Nor had she ever imagined how such news could spread through the court like wildfire, twisting and growing until it had gained her the scorn of everyone around her.

In her dreams Kagome had the horrible sensation of sinking deeper and deeper down into a dark, stiflingly empty pit. And every morning when she woke the pit still lingered about her, weighting her every move and casting shadows on the surrounding world.

She struggled weakly, but all Kagome could see was the overwhelming disapproval and disappointment of those around her. There was no way out.

* * *

On her eighth day serving Kikyou, however, there was a change. Kagome awoke before a servant came to rouse her. Looking groggily about, she could see from the light filling the room that it was some time later than she was usually made to rise.

She felt a brief, dull pang of worry, wondering if the servant had forgotten to wake her. Kikyou might be cross with her. Then again, it was not as if Kikyou was ever pleased with her really…

Slowly Kagome crawled out from her futon, intending to go find out what was going on. That in and of itself would be a feat, considering that none of the servants would speak to her. Glancing about the room, she realized that there were no clothes for her to change into, either.

Looking down at her rough, worn sleeping yukata, Kagome sighed. She briefly contemplated going out in it, speculating as to whether or not they could possibly think her any more indecent than they already did. It hardly seemed likely.

With another sigh she sank back down onto her futon, lacking the drive to do anything else. If Kikyou wanted to punish her, she could punish her. Kagome simply could not bring herself to care.

Just as she was falling back into the welcoming embrace of sleep and oblivion, the shoji door slid open. Kagome roused herself, watching as a servant boy walked hesitantly into the room. He set down the bundle he was carrying several lengths away from her.

Kagome watched him, her heart sinking the smallest bit. She did not bother trying to speak to him, as she had found again and again that her efforts with the servants never got her anywhere.

He turned to as if to leave, but hesitated and turned back once more. He gave her a long, open look from head to toe. There was something in his face, some twisted mix of disgust and curious desire.

Kagome felt her skin crawl sickeningly. Fear flashed briefly in her gut as it occurred to her that they were alone and there was little to stop him from trying something.

Disgust, however, seemed to win out. The boy's mouth twisted at even having entertained such thoughts with such a woman, and he hurriedly left the room. Kagome let out a breath she had not realized she was holding.

Disgust crept in as the air rushed out. She was no idiot. She knew well enough how men looked at women when they thought them loose.

Her stomach roiling slightly at the thought, she crawled over to the bundle the boy had left and slowly opened it. Her eyes widened slightly at the sight of a set of fine, clean miko robes of crisp white and deep red. A small note sat on top of the clothes and Kagome picked it up, reading:

_I have been informed by the court's High Priestess Midoriko-sama that a training date was arranged by my Lord several days ago for you. In light of this I pardon you from your duties as my attendant for the day._

_You are to meet Midoriko-sama at high noon in the Chūwain, enclosed by the outer Kenreimon gate of the Inner Palace on the northern edge. Be prompt and properly respectful. Also, be prepared to return to your duties to me early tomorrow._

_Work hard,_

_Fujiwara Kikyou_

Kagome blinked several times, frowning. She read the note once more. Still the words were the same.

A small, trembling hope rose in Kagome's chest for the first time in days. If Inuyasha had arranged a training session for her, then he could not possibly be intending to dismiss her from the court!

Still doubt hovered in her mind, circling ominously like a black bird. If Inuyasha knew about the rumor as she was certain he did, then it simply made no sense at all. She scanned through the note once more.

Ah. There was the catch.

The arrangements had been made several days ago, meaning that the Tennō had probably made them before she had so foolishly gone to see Kouga. He was simply too furious at her or too busy to remember to call off the meeting. Kagome sighed, slumping as the tiny ember of hope in her chest flickered out.

Well, whether or not the Tennō wanted it to happen, the appointment was still set. She might as well attend and get from it what she could.

Kagome stood and removed the sleeping yukata, donning the robes that had been provided. The material felt like silk against her skin after days of nothing but coarse serving clothes. She unbraided her hair from the plait she had worn it in for the past week, running her fingers through it for lack of any comb.

She went out to the back of the residence and drew water up from the well. She splashed it against her face, gasping at the cold.

Still she scrubbed until her cheeks were pink and her fingers numb, wanting to look at least slightly more presentable. She washed her hands in the bucket, as well, before dumping the contents out onto one of the nearby plants.

Judging by the angle of the sun overhead, Kagome estimated that she had about half an hour or so before high noon. She decided to set off without breakfast, knowing she would probably need the entirety of the time to find the Chūwain building.

She headed towards the eastern entrance through the inner wall, finding it easily enough after leaving the confines of Kikyou's residence. Thankfully she encountered no one on her way except for the guard who watched the gate, though she was uncertain if anyone would recognize her by appearance anyway.

She went northwards as the note had indicated, observing the numerous storage areas and private official structures that lined the outer Kenreimon wall of the Inner Palace. She had not known there were buildings contained by the outer wall, as well.

Kagome passed through several slightly populated areas on her way, tensing anxiously each time. For the most part, though, people barely spared her a second glance. She had only been before the entire court once, after all, and they could hardly be expected to remember her face. A small mercy.

At length Kagome came to the red torii that framed a set of steep ascending stairs. She passed under the torii and began to climb the numerous stone steps, lined on each side by towering, thick-trunked trees.

She relaxed a bit in the cool, concealing shade of the dense foliage. There was a very calm aura to this place. The first aura that Kagome had really noticed in several days. Even nature had seemed silent and detached from her after the spread of the rumor.

She breathed deeply, apologizing silently to the kami for her neglect. She reached the top of the steps and passed under the second torii, signaling that her ascension onto a higher plane had finished.

A series of several small red and white buildings were arranged around a larger, central one. Each had the sloping triangular roof she had become accustomed to seeing in the court and each was connected to the others by sets of covered walkways.

Two tall, stern looking stone komainu, the shrine guardians, sat on raised pillars on either side of the main building to ward off any harmful spirits. Kagome bypassed these and headed off to the left where she could see a small, manmade pond. A plank of wood lay across it with several wooden ladles placed on the plank.

Kagome took up one of the ladles, scooping up water and pouring slowly it over both of her hands. She took one last scoop of water sipped it, washing it around in her mouth before spitting it back out beside the pond. She replaced the ladle and turned towards the main shrine, the water having purified her enough to enter.

She paused before the entryway of the shrine, over which was hung a shimenawa to mark the land as sacred ground. She clapped twice to gain the attention of any kami inhabiting the place, before bowing to show her deference to them.

The miko took a deep breath, filling herself with a serenity that helped to temporarily distance herself from her circumstances. It was good to finally feel as if she had gotten away from herself.

Kagome straightened once more and shrieked, nearly falling backwards in her surprise. In the previously empty entryway now stood an older, solid looking woman in red and white miko robes.

Long hair flowed freely, unbound, down her back. Once dark as night, snow white threads were now peppered throughout the mass of midnight strands.

She gazed at Kagome with steady, deeply brown eyes. Her face was only slightly lined in her old age, and what had obviously been the great beauty of her youth was now a regal sort of serenity.

The symbol of the mitsu tomoe had been tattooed upon her forehead, Kagome noted with no small amount of awe. She remembered Kaede sketching the symbol out in dirt for her when she was younger, telling her that only the most distinguished spiritualists were allowed to wear the mark.

Three flames were traditional, Kagome recalled. Four flames, however, were upon this woman’s brow, representing great knowledge of the interplay of all the forces of the cosmos. Truly this woman must be a formidable spiritualist, none other than the O-Miko Midoriko.

"You are Kagome?" the woman asked, shaking Kagome free from her thoughts.

"Y-Yes. Pleased to meet you, O-Miko-sama," she said, bowing deeply.

She frowned, though, her face towards the ground. There was no question in her mind as to whether or not this woman was the O-Miko Midoriko. However, she had not felt the woman's approach at all.

Even now, bowing before her and concentrating, she could not feel even the vaguest hint of spiritual energy around the woman. In Kagome's sixth spiritual sight she was all but invisible.

"No need for that," the woman said, gesturing for Kagome to rise. "I would rather that we skip the pointless formalities and start on our lessons."

Kagome straightened, an apology springing instinctively to her lips. But now the woman was right beside her, frowning questioningly into her face. Kagome stumbled backwards a step. This woman was oddly light-footed.

And suddenly the O-Miko’s hand reached out, skimming over her hip. Kagome jerked, a strange jolt running through her from head to foot. The woman's frown deepened, the palm of her hand coming to press flat against the protrusion of her hip bone.

There was a flash of light, and Kagome fell backwards with a small yelp.

She sat for a moment, dazed. She blinked hard, trying to regain her vision and figure out what the woman had just done to her. Nothing hurt, though her hip felt a little numb.

Nothing in her aura felt any different, either. At last her eyes cleared, and she found Midoriko staring down at her with vague disquiet in her face.

"You know a woman by the name of Kaede?"

It was more statement than question.

"She was my teacher back in our village," Kagome replied without thinking, disoriented.

Though her expression did not shift much outwardly, something behind the elder woman's eyes seemed to sink. She bent down, offering a hand to help Kagome up. Instinctively she accepted it, surprised by the strength with which she was hauled to her feet.

"I am terribly sorry," the woman uttered softly, turning away from her to enter the main shrine.

Kagome trailed hurriedly after her, gathering her scattered wits as she went. "Wait! What just-?"

"You do not strike me as the harlot that many have made you out to be," Midoriko interrupted quietly, slanting a knowing glance at her from the corner of her eye.

Kagome went cold, stumbling to a halt. She had forgotten for a moment, but the curse would not let her alone for long. Even Midoriko had heard the rumors. Did she not want to teach her anymore?

"I'm not a…a loose woman!" Kagome burst out vehemently, unable to restrain the words after having bitten them back for so long. "Those rumors are completely untrue! I mean, certainly I made an error in judgment, but I…!"

"Calm yourself, Kagome," Midoriko said, quietly slipping off her zori sandals before stepping onto the tatami mat floor. "I believe you."

Kagome closed her mouth, observing as the woman went over to the shrine at the far end of the room. She frowned, feeling off balance. It was sad to realize that trust felt unfamiliar.

"How do you know?" Kagome said incredulously, knowing she should not push the matter and unable to stop herself.

"Your aura speaks more loudly than any words could," Midoriko replied simply. "And I do not put much stock in the rumors that fly like carrion crows about this court. They are all of them vicious, and all of them aimed to injure."

She knelt down, bowing deeply before the shrine of Amaterasu. Kagome removed her own shoes absently, her thoughts churning, and went to join her.

"Everyone else seems to believe it," Kagome said quietly, a bitter edge to her words. She knelt down beside the woman, bowing as well.

"Everyone else _wants_ to believe it," Midoriko responded. "They never wanted you here in the first place. Your presence here upsets their sensibilities, throws into disorder things they have been taught since they still wore swaddling cloth. Of course they would want to think badly of you. I would suggest that you learn to discount such talk if you plan to remain here."

"…You are not concerned with my birth status, then, O-Mimi-sama?" Kagome asked, ignoring for the moment how much that advice sounded like the advice she had been given by Kikyou.

"While there are many traditions that I hold dear, I do not believe that the longevity of a thing necessarily lends to it any truth. We are all of us people beneath the kami, commoner and courtier alike. That is the only distinction that I have ever felt truly needed to be made in this world, whatever the lessons might say to the contrary. All others are simply human attempts to make order," Midoriko said.

Kagome gazed at the woman wonderingly, her brow furrowing as she tried to process this. She had been raised with the traditional lessons in her village, as well, and had never thought to question the truth of them.

Of course people were people, to be treated as such, but the kami placed certain people in different places for reasons, didn't they? Were not those who were born lower meant to serve, and those born higher meant to rule? There had to be an order to things….didn't there?

She could not quite get her mind around it. The idea was too new, too foreign to her.

"Shall we begin, then?" Midoriko asked, recalling her attention.

"Ah…yes," Kagome agreed, tucking her tangled thoughts away to be sorted through at another time.

Midoriko might be slightly incomprehensible to her, but she found herself eager to listen to whatever she had to teach her. She seemed…almost transcendent somehow, as if she were already beyond the world.

"Then you may start by telling me what you have already been taught."

"Ah, well…" Kagome thought for a moment, recalling all of the lessons she had had with Kaede back in her village. "I am fairly decent at healing. I can use the bow and arrows without much trouble. The meditations come easily to me. I think that might be about it…"

Kagome trailed off sheepishly, realizing fully for the first time how truly lacking her skills were. Midoriko eyed her contemplatively, a quiet 'hmmm' on her lips. At length she shook her head.

"Kaede always had spirit, I will give her that. But she was never a great talent when it came to the spiritual arts," she sighed. "I think she might have done you a disservice in training you in such a half-hearted manner. Though she likely thought you would never have much use for any kind of great power in the confines of your village."

"You knew Kaede-sama, O-Miko-sama?" Kagome asked, suddenly recalling her mentioning her mentor earlier.

"I taught Kaede," Midoriko amended. "She was not much my junior in age, but far my junior in skill. Being a daughter of the once prosperous Fujiwara family made her a bit soft, you see.”

“I can only suppose from the look of surprise on your face that village life has aged her more harshly than myself. I would suggest that you learn to rein that in a bit. Displaying too much of your mind to the world is not always prudent."

Kagome could only vaguely take in the advice, distracted as she was by the sudden whirring of her thoughts.

Of course she was shocked to learn that Kaede was both the disciple of and younger than Midoriko, but far more so than that was the shock of learning that Kaede was of the Fujiwara.

Her mentor and the woman who had caused her so much trouble here in the court were related. Perhaps even directly related. Perhaps even so close as sisters or the like! Kagome had the eerie feeling of being tangled in a binding web.

But Kaede's revealed lineage brought an entirely more puzzling thought to the surface. Why would a woman whose clan was at the height of its power, practically reigning alongside the Tennō, abandon the court in favor of a life of poverty and struggle in a tiny, failing village?

"Midoriko-sama?" Kagome ventured.

Midoriko's brows lifted in indication to continue.

"What happened to the Fujiwara clan?"

A shadow fell abruptly over Midoriko's face, all of its fine lines deepening for just an instant. Brown eyes, deep with the passing of many years, slid away to gaze at the altar to Amaterasu once more.

"How does the fate of the Fujiwara clan concern you, Kagome?" she queried, something like reluctance lurking just beneath her words.

"I just…want to understand," Kagome said a bit helplessly. “I need to understand what is happening here. What I am caught up in.”

Midoriko was quiet for a long stretch, staring contemplatively at the single flower in an ornate vase that sat upon the shrine. She sighed softly, looking truly aged to Kagome for the first time.

"I suppose the quest for understanding is an honorable one, though we are straying from our original purpose here," she said. "Ah, well. Furthering your understanding of the court has its own importance. Though it is a story I would prefer not to have to tell."

"Everyone keeps saying that," Kagome said pensively, recalling the number of other times the tragedy of the Fujiwara family had been lightly alluded to. "Is it really so terrible, what happened?"

"One of the lowest points in the history of the court, and that is saying something," Midoriko said lowly. "Has any one yet told you of the throne war that occurred before the ascension of our current Tennō-sama?"

"Yes," Kagome replied. "I was told about the former Tennō-sama's decree and how other clans fought to bar the current Tennō-sama's ascension."

Kagome tried very hard to keep the word as just a word in her mind. Tried very hard not to picture his angry, disappointed face as she said it. 

She focused on Midoriko's answer instead, willing herself not to sink back down into those feelings for at least a bit longer.

"Then you already have the gist of it," Midoriko said. "The tale of the Fujiwara family is a chapter in that story, one that everyone would gladly forget if we had the ability.”

“The Fujiwara clan has served the Tennō-sama faithfully for generations upon generations. They never questioned his Majesty's will and never hesitated to put all of their resources at his disposal. This was originally how they gained such high standing within the court, as a reward for their unwavering devotion.”

“Knowing this, it should come as no surprise to you to learn that the Fujiwara wholeheartedly stepped in to support our current Tennō-sama when it was decreed that his Majesty would be the next successor.”

“They supported any word passed by the Tennō-sama, and wanted to see his former Majesty's will done regardless of what their personal opinions might have been.”

“As you likely know, this was not a popular opinion. In stepping up to openly back our current Tennō-sama, they gained themselves many enemies. Still, the Fujiwara clan had enough power behind them to discourage any outright attacks.” 

“And so it began with the Lady of the Fujiwara clan. She was found dead in the bath-house. No one had thought to check that water for poison, but surely enough it had been tampered with.”

“It was a clever move, impossible to trace because of the way the water was pumped into the bath-house from an unmonitored source. Still, the Lord of the Fujiwara clan had several servants put to death for the crime, though they were likely innocent.”

“The Lord went a bit insane after the death of his Lady, a kind, soft-spoken woman with whom he had been deeply in love. He became positively nonsensical in his grief, and the Fujiwara clan fell into disarray.”

“One night in his madness he wandered out to visit his wife's grave alone. That was where his body was found the next morning, his head having been removed.”

“Yet again no criminal could be found. All of his responsibilities fell to his only son, who was a mere thirteen years of age at that time. He proved to be incompetent at best.”

“He did not know how to organize the family troops, and sent them out to keep watch of the other clans in their residences outside the court. A horrible mistake on his part.”

“Together they were a great force, but he spread them too thin and they were slaughtered one group at a time. The majority of the survivors deserted or turned traitor, unwilling to die for what was fast becoming a lost cause.” 

“The son had no great skill in organizing the clan, either. With few soldiers left to help them hold their position, many of the clan members became frightened. A large group, the majority of them, decided to retreat back to the safety of their residence in the east.”

“They…never made it back. Along the way they encountered something, no one is quite certain what to this day, and they were slaughtered to the last woman and child.”

“There was not a single survivor to tell the tale of what befell them there. Reports of it came back to the capital from several merchants, all of whom claimed it was the most horrendous massacre they had ever borne witness to.”

“And thus the Fujiwara clan fell from power, barely a handful of the clan surviving. The son was so sick with grief over his failures that he committed ritual seppuku soon after, leaving his sister, our future Empress, as the last prominent member of the once great line.”

“Never before in the history of the court had a clan been so maliciously targeted and so ruthlessly picked off. The deliberateness of it all was unmistakable and chilling.”

“Killing the relatively powerless Lady first was too calculated for it to have been anything else. Whoever was responsible for it knew the Fujiwara clansmen well enough to know what weak points to aim for, and was more than a bit skilled in the art of manipulation."

Kagome sat in silence, her mind blank with horror. Distantly she realized that it all made sense. The lack of clansmen to be found at either Fujiwara residence. The Taira woman, Kagura, alluding to Kikyou having no clan backing.

But an entire clan, with members numbering most likely in the hundreds, slaughtered for supporting the will of Japan's divine Tennō? And killed off in such a pointedly calculated manner, without sparing even the helpless women and children.

"Kaede-sama…" Kagome breathed, a horrible thought occurring to her.

"Many of Kaede's closest relatives were killed," Midoriko filled in, her eyes downcast. "Kaede herself lost her eye when returning late one night from visiting her mother's grave, though the guardsmen she was with managed to prevent the loss of her life by surrendering his own.”

“At last the grief became too heavy a burden for her to bear any longer. I… advised her that she would likely be best off if she were to leave the court and all of the tragedy behind her. She agreed readily, and I aided her in escaping from the court in secret."

Kagome slumped slightly, curling in on herself. She felt as if she wanted to cry, but no tears would come. It was too terrible.

She had never thought to ask Kaede. She had never once seen the kindly woman look like she was suffering in the least bit. And yet all the while Kaede had been living with this terrible secret, and Kagome had been oblivious.

Kikyou came to her mind unbidden. Kami knew she was in no way interested in sympathizing with the cold woman, but she could hardly help herself now.

To have had to watch her relatives be killed off one by one, to fear every day that she might be the next to go, and then to have to pick up the all of the pieces once it was over. If Kikyou had not hardened herself against it all, there was no way she could have survived.

"I understand that you are upset at learning all of this so suddenly," said Midoriko, deep sympathy in her voice. "But there is nothing that can be done for it now. All we can do now is strengthen ourselves and walk forward, making certain that nothing of the kind ever occurs again."

Kagome raised her eyes to the older woman, observing the look of careful composure on her graceful features. She had been through the massacre of the Fujiwara and the throne war, as well. And yet she was not broken. She was not defeated.

Suddenly Kagome's own problems did not seem quite so insurmountable. She still had her family, though they were not near her at the moment, and her life was not in any particular sort of danger.

So what if people snubbed her and thought her low down? So what if she was to be nothing but a servant in the court, separate always from those she served? Surely she could bear this much.

She realized that she had been letting the court have far too much influence over her. She needed to toughen up if she was going to get where she needed to go. And by all the kami, she would definitely find a way to convince Inuyasha to let her stay in the court!

"Midoriko-sama," Kagome said, turning eyes bright with newfound resolve to meet the older woman's. "Please do me the great honor of teaching me everything you know. I will definitely make certain that such evils never occur again."

She bowed deeply, her forehead coming down to touch the tatami mats beneath her. Midoriko watched the girl prostrating herself so humbly, resolution in the very set of her slim shoulders. She allowed herself to smile slightly.

Perhaps her initial worries had been unfounded. Perhaps the girl had enough spirit to get her through everything that Midoriko knew would soon be coming…

"If you have the will to follow through with your words, then I can surely make you as great as the ancient Empress Pimiko-sama herself," Midoriko said, fondness growing quietly behind her words.

"Pimiko-sama?" Kagome echoed questioningly, rising from her bow. The name was unfamiliar to her.

"Kaede neglected to tell you of Pimiko-sama?" Midoriko asked. "Well, she never was any great scholar, either. One would hope that the years might have altered her lackadaisical nature, but…"

She heaved poised little sigh, shaking her head at some memory. Kagome smiled slightly despite the lingering heaviness in her heart. There was a very obvious affection toward Kaede in Midoriko’s words, like an elder sibling concerned for the future of a younger one.

"Who was Pimiko-sama, Midoriko-sama? A miko?" Kagome questioned.

"Not just any miko," Midoriko corrected, her chin tilting up with just a hint of pride. "She was one of the founders of our long line. She was also one of the first rulers of Japan, presiding over a large clan of subjects in the Honshu and Kyushu provinces of old."

"She…did not rule alongside an Emperor?" Kagome asked incredulously.

Women did not rule alone. It simply did not happen, as far as Kagome knew. The throne was always passed from male heir to male heir, or to the husbands of daughters or nearest male relatives in the absence of a male heir.

"Empress Pimiko-sama did not need an Emperor," Midoriko said, a grin playing at the edges of her lips. "She _gained_ her nobility. She ruled through her own ability and nothing more."

"How do you mean?" Kagome asked, intrigued. How exactly would one go about gaining noble status, she wondered.

"She was a miko, as I have said. But she was far more than most miko can claim to be. She was given the ultimate gift by the kami," Midoriko said. "She was given the gift of foresight. The ability to see certain things before they came to pass.”

“For this, and for her other great spiritual gifts, people respected her deeply. They followed willingly after her."

Kagome blinked once. Twice. A third time. She had an idea.

It was absurd. It was outrageous and so utterly preposterous that she could hardly believe it had come into her head. It was absolutely perfect.

Abruptly Kagome scrambled to her feet. She made a hurried, sloppy bow to Midoriko. Buzzing with sudden energy, it took all she had not to just break into a run.

"I'm terribly sorry, Midoriko-sama, but may I request that we cut this lesson short? I've just had a thought that I believe would be best tended to immediately," Kagome said, clasping her hands before her in askance.

"What happened to wanting to learn everything I have to teach?" returned Midoriko bemusedly, unable to follow the sudden shift in the girl.

"I beg your pardon, Midoriko-sama. I promise I will give you my full attention and effort during our next training session, but I truly believe I must act immediately," Kagome said, not wanting to disrespect the woman but not willing to back down, either.

Midoriko studied the girl, eyeing the bright look in her eyes. She looked far more spirited now than when she had first entered the shrine. And it was rather admirable, the way she managed to draw such resolve from tragedy. The elder miko could not help but think she would very much like to see the places this girl was fated to go.

"Alright, then," Midoriko allowed. "Go ahead. But be prepared to work to make up for this next time."

"Yes, of course. Thank you, Midoriko-sama," Kagome said, nearly breathless with relief and agitation.

She bowed once more before hurrying as quickly as was proper from the room, stopping only to slip on her sandals before dashing out. Midoriko watched her go, her expression slipping as the girl's sprightly form disappeared from sight. She turned to Amaterasu's altar, bowing her head once more to pray.

"Hear my lowly prayers if you would, Amaterasu-sama, just once more. Please do not punish her for my weak, foolish heart…"

* * *

Kagome practically flew across the distance between the temple and the Inner Palace, ignoring the odd looks her mad dash her. Before she had even really gathered all of her chaotic thoughts and half-formed plans, she was in front of the entrance to Inuyasha's chambers.

She stood for a moment, trying to catch her breath and figure out how she was going to manage to actually get inside. Surely Inuyasha would not be happy to see her, and she had come unbidden. A guard standing near the entryway eyed her critically.

Kagome exhaled, deciding that she might as well try the direct approach. It could not do much harm, anyway. She stepped up to the guard, drawing herself up to her full and admittedly unimpressive height.

"I need to speak with his Majesty," Kagome said, meeting the man's eyes firmly.

"I didn't know his Majesty had summoned anyone," returned the guard, noting her ruffled appearance from having run the entire way.

"His Majesty did not summon me, but I need to speak with him nonetheless," Kagome insisted stubbornly, clenching her fists and willing herself to press forward.

"I don't think-"

"Please go tell his Majesty that the miko Kagome is here to see him," Kagome interrupted, gesturing insistently towards the hanging curtain.

It was not in her nature to be so forceful with people normally, but at the moment she was determined. The lingering grief over the story, still fresh in her mind, drove her on. She needed to talk to Inuyasha no matter what.

"I'll see if his Majesty's interested in seeing you," the guard ground out, obviously annoyed.

With a huff he turned and entered the chamber. Kagome sighed, pacing around agitatedly as she awaited a response. She prayed one week was sufficient time for him to have at least calmed down enough that he would consider seeing her.

After what felt like an eternity to her, the guard reemerged. He looked even more disgruntled. Kagome grinned involuntarily.

"His Majesty says you may enter," the guard muttered, as Kagome had anticipated.

"Thank you," Kagome said with no small amount of satisfaction, brushing past him.

She entered the dimly lit chamber, a bit of her satisfaction fading as nervousness set in. She had given very little thought as to how she would actually handle all of this.

Quietly she knelt down before the screen, bowing her head and waiting to be addressed before she spoke. She knew Inuyasha would need to say his piece before he would be ready to hear anything she had to say.

It was tensely silent for a long, long moment. Kagome braced herself for the explosion she could feel building.

"The hell did you come here for?"

Kagome winced at the sound of the voice coming from behind the screen. He was not yelling as she had expected, but somehow the low rumbling growl to his voice was worse. She shifted, steadying herself.

"I know you must have heard certain things, Inuyasha-sama, and I know that you are probably very cross with me, however-" Kagome attempted hurriedly.

"Cross? _Cross_? Cross isn't the fucking half of what I am with you!"

There was the yelling. Kagome jumped slightly as the shadow behind the screen stood and seemed to loom threateningly over her. Perhaps this had not been such a good idea…

"I knew you were an idiot, but how could you do something so fucking… _idiotic_?! All that yapping about wanting to do all that righteous shit and then you pull something like this! What the hell were you thinking?" Inuyasha ranted, pacing wildly about behind the screen.

"I wasn't thinking, but it's not what you think it-" Kagome tried again, leaning forward desperately. At this rate he would dismiss her from the court before she could even get out a full sentence.

"It's clear as day what the hell happened!" Inuyasha erupted, cutting her off. "You put yourself in a fucking stupid position with that mangy, flea-bitten wolf and rumors got started! Damnit, woman!"

Kagome froze, her eyes going very wide. All of her arguments went cold on the tip of her tongue. Surely she could not have heard correctly…

"And do you know how many fucking courtiers started petitioning to have you thrown out of the court because of it?" Inuyasha continued to rage. "It took forever to get those assholes to shut up!”

“I had to ask- _ask_ , wench!-that mangy ass wolf to not go near you so that the rumors would die down! I had to _ask_ that perverted houshi and that Tachibana woman to spread counter-rumors!”

“All that because you felt the need to run around like a little imbecile all over the damn court playing emissary! And I damn well better be getting one hell of an apology for all that crap!"

His tirade finished, Inuyasha crossed his arms and waited with strained patience for her to grovel and bow in her gratitude. Silence. Complete silence. Had she fucking fallen asleep or something?

Inuyasha growled, stomping around the screen to Kagome's side to see what was going on. She was simply sitting there, staring perplexedly at the screen.

Inuyasha groaned. By all the kami, she was broken.

"Oi, wench-"

"You mean," said Kagome softly, wonderingly. "All this time, you knew I hadn't done anything inappropriate with Kouga-sama?"

"Not the whole time," Inuyasha answered slowly, wondering what exactly was going through her head. "At first I heard it and I was so fucking pissed I couldn't see straight. But Kikyou was with me, and she said it didn't make sense for you to…'put yourself in that sort of position'…or something.”

“And I was still pissed as hell, but I couldn't stop thinking about it and it _didn't_ make sense. And I just kept fucking _thinking_ about it, and all that did make sense was that you had been fucking naïve as usual and shit had happened from there."

Kagome blinked, her gaze shifting downwards as she tried to process it all. Slowly she turned to look at Inuyasha. The hanyou nearly blanched at the expression on her face, crumpled like a small, hurt child.

"Then why didn't you ever summon me? This whole week…" Kagome trailed off, her voice cracking as tears began to leak from her eyes.

Panic spiked in Inuyasha's chest. The hell?! He hadn't said anything that bad, had he? Swearing under his breath, Inuyasha dropped down beside her.

"Oi, listen, I-"

"You-!" Kagome choked, turning suddenly and collapsing against his chest.

Inuyasha flinched, his entire body going rigid at the sudden contact.

"I can't believe you! You're terrible! Awful!" Kagome chanted, pounding lightly at one of his shoulders as she continued to sob.

It was such a relief. By the kami, it was such a relief. They had all believed in her. They had been working to help her. None of them had tried to abandon her. None of them thought her low-down. Kagome was nearly incoherent in her happiness.

"All week I thought you and Miroku-sama and Sango-sama all hated me!" she cried, hardly aware as the words tumbled from her mouth. "I thought you believed the rumors! I thought you were going to throw me out of the court! I thought you were avoiding me! Stupid, stupid, stupid!"

"Who are you calling stupid, stupid? You're the one who got yourself into all this by not thinking," Inuyasha defended, though with much less venom than before.

He shifted awkwardly, staring down at the girl sobbing and clinging to him. Still, as uncomfortable as he was, he could not bring himself to simply push her away as he might have done with others. One of his hands hovered uncertainly over her head as he wrestled with the urge to offer some sort of consoling gesture.

"Oi, look, Kagome," he tried awkwardly. "I was pissed off over all the bullshit. I was too pissed off to even wanna see you. Just…ugh! What in the seven hells will make you stop crying, woman!?"

Kagome sniffled loudly, pushing back slightly. She glared up at him with watery eyes.

"Well, excuse me," she huffed, wiping angrily at her damp cheeks. "I only spent a whole week alone, thinking you all hated me and I was going to be sent home in disgrace to tell my village I failed!"

Inuyasha sighed in long-suffering manner. He scowled down at the hiccupping girl half-heartedly.

"Whatever. It's all done now," Inuyasha said dismissively. "Just watch yourself with the courtiers from now on. You associate too closely with any of them and shit's bound to happen."

Kagome's eyes widened, his words striking a sudden cord in her head. Her gaze shifted slowly down to her hands, planted firmly against Inuyasha's chest for support, as if they were some strange foreign entities.

Her eyes trailed further down, and her heart nearly stopped. She was practically sitting in the lap of the sovereign of her country.

With a squeak Kagome jerked backwards, apologies spilling from her mouth. She was mortified, hardly able to believe that she had just been so incredibly disrespectful. But Inuyasha had watched the progression of emotions across her face, feeling it when her muscles tensed to bolt.

On instinct his hand shot out, grabbing one of her wrists as she attempted to escape. Caught off guard and off balance, Kagome came tumbling back down into the hanyou's lap.

"What the hell is wrong with you now, wench?!" Inuyasha barked over the jumbled apologies still flowing rapidly form her mouth.

"Propriety! And order!" Kagome attempted, struggling against the hanyou's unyielding hold. "A commoner can't associate closely with nobles! A commoner can't-!"

"What are you babbling about, woman?" he asked, managing to catch hold of the struggling girl's shoulders to keep her still. She raised wide, petrified eyes up to meet his own before they darted away quickly, her face going pale.

"P-Please let me go, Tennō-sama. I can not apologize enough for my utter disrespect. I-I got caught up in….well, I promise you I will never act so shamefully out of line again…Just, please…."

Inuyasha's scowl deepened in confusion. He gripped Kagome’s shoulder more tightly, giving her a small shake. She jerked, blinking up at him in surprise.

"What. The. Hell. Are. You. Talking. About?" he repeated, speaking with the slow emphasis one might use for a particularly dull child.

"The Future Empress…she did me the service of reminding me of what I had forgotten," Kagome said softly. "I cannot change my birth status, Tennō-sama, and you…you cannot lower yourself to be familiar with me. None of the nobles can. I am sorry that I have been so presumptuous with you up until now…but I promise…I promise it will not happen anymore. I know my place now, so please don't…"

"Kikyou told you all this?" Inuyasha interrupted.

"She told me nothing I was not already aware of, though I was foolish enough to forget it," Kagome replied, her eyes downcast.

Inuyasha stared down at her for a long moment, thrown by the abrupt shift. She had never hesitated to argue with him before, to run her mouth and force whatever ideas popped into that fool head of hers onto him. 

And now that she was finally quiet…he found he didn't like it. He didn't want it.

"Forget again, then," he ordered.

Kagome turned an uncomprehending frown up to him. "Forget…?"

"Everything. Everything Kikyou told you. Everything anyone's ever told you about all that 'commoners should be this' and 'nobles should be that' bullshit."

"But, Tennō-sama-"

"No! Dammit, woman, we've been over this! I'm Inuyasha. And you're Kagome, in case your head is so filled with shit that you've forgotten that, too," he snapped, gratified when her eyes flashed up to meet his briefly in irritation. "And I sure as hell don't need another court-trained serving worm, bowing and simpering all the time. I've got plenty of those bastards, and they'd as easily serve someone else as me. But you…Look, screw lowering yourself to scrape at the feet of all those morons. I'll back you, propriety be fucked."

Kagome's eyes widened in astonishment, staring up into his own intensely golden ones. Her mouth worked wordlessly, trying to catch up, to form some sort of coherent response to his outrageous words. He could not be serious…

"But I can't!" she cast about desperately. "By associating closely with Miroku-sama or Sango-sama or…or you, Inuyasha-sama, all I could do is bring shame to you. People are born into certain positions for a reason, and-"

"You really believe that?" the hanyou cut in, a hard edge to his tone. "You really believe that where you're born decides how much you're worth? How much you can do?"

"I just…I was always taught-" 

"Maybe you were taught wrong! Maybe everyone was taught wrong! Just because something gets repeated over and over doesn't make it fucking right, Kagome! You want change, don't you? You want better for those villagers and everyone, don't you?"

She was silent, her mind whirring as she tried to keep up. Wasn't this…wasn't this what Midoriko had tried to tell her, as well?

"Well, don't you?!" Inuyasha barked insistently.

"Yes! I do! I really do!" Kagome burst out, almost without thought.

"Well, shit will never change for them or you if you keep actin' like you're inferior! So do what you want! Act how you want! Be friends with whoever the fuck you want to be friends with! Prove to those stuck-up bastards that you're just as good as they are!"

The hanyou gazed fiercely into her face, his eyes alight. Kagome gazed back helplessly, caught up in the torrent of his intensity. There was something there, though, some fire that seemed to go beyond even his anger at her or on her behalf…

It struck her suddenly, and she nearly gasped. Inuyasha was not just talking about her situation, though perhaps that was all he meant to talk about.

It was him, too. Born into a supposedly inferior position as a bastard son and a hanyou, but fighting to make the court believe that he was worth just as much as anyone.

That was the difference between them. He was fighting, whereas she was still clinging to the notions of an order and propriety that she felt safe in. The courtiers were not the only ones who had been taught the order of things from the time they were in swaddling cloths. Still…

"Alright," she managed to get out, nodding. "Alright. I'll try."

A grin split the hanyou's face, so wide his canines glinted in the lamplight. A sort of pride surged up in him.

"That's the first smart thing you've said since you got here," he approved smugly. Kagome frowned.

"Well, I think I have one more," she replied, tilting her chin up petulantly.

"What?" the hanyou returned, pleased to see she was something like her old obnoxious self again.

"I…I want to be _your_ friend, Inuyasha-sama," she declared, meeting his eyes stubbornly with her own.

Inuyasha's grin dissolved, his jaw going slack. A flush crept up to heat his face.

"W-What?"

"You said I could be friends with whoever I want, right?" Kagome pressed, silently pleased at having gained the upper hand. "I want to be friends with _you_ , Inuyasha-sama. I want to help support you. And…maybe together we can prove to them that we really are worth just as much."

The hanyou blinked down at her, his embarrassment slowly fading. Her face was…sincere. Open. She actually…wanted to be friends with him. Something curled warmly up into his chest, though he fought to push it down.

"I…Feh," Inuyasha scoffed, unable to come up with anything else. Kagome's face softened into a shy smile.

"I will take that as a yes," she said. "Thank you, Inuyasha-sama."

The hanyou huffed, turning away to conceal the flush climbing up his neck. Really, the girl was harder to figure out than those stupid old tomes in the archive building…

"Ah!" gasped Kagome after a few moments of silence, abruptly recalling what she had come to say in the first place. "Inuyasha-sama! I was with Midoriko-sama, and she was telling me a story and I had the most…well, maybe it's a bit risky, but I think it could work if we-"

"Quit babbling, woman, and spit it out already," Inuyasha cut in.

"Fine, then," Kagome huffed, a little of her excitement fading. "Let's see…"

She considered it for a few minutes, trying to figure out a way to explain her plan without it sounding entirely insane and implausible. It was more than a little outrageous, she had to admit. Still, if it worked it might very well be the answer to several of her prayers…

A thought occurred her and a broad smile blossomed across her face. Inuyasha observed that smile with no small amount of wariness. It was the smile of someone plotting something. And the kami only knew what sort of crazy shit this girl was capable of…

Kagome stood, kicking several cushions out of her way. She turned back to Inuyasha, beaming. The hanyou grimaced, watching with growing trepidation as the girl spread her arms wide for what he imagined would be the many wild gesticulations accompanying an even wilder explanation.

Suddenly Kagome began to convulse. Tremors wracked her slim frame from head to toe, and her face went as pale as snow. Her eyes rolled back into her head. She made small choking noises, shaking violently all over.

"Kagome!" Inuyasha shouted, jumping up and going to the girl.

Panic spiked in the hanyou, his chest tightening. What the hell was happening to the girl? He grabbed both of shoulders, pulling her into his arms in the hope of stopping the convulsions.

Kagome flopped back limply in his grasp, the whites of her eyes showing. Suddenly she was utterly still.

Inuyasha stared into her slack face, his breath trapped in his throat. Kagome…Kagome…

"Oi, Kagome. Kagome! Kagome!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mini-history note:
> 
> The Pimiko mentioned by Midoriko is an actual historical figure in Japan, though I may have embellished accounts of her for my own purposes.
> 
> The gist of her story, though, is that she was an early ruler in Japan in the Yayoi period. She ruled in the Kyushu and Honshu provinces in most of the accounts I've read, though that point is debated.
> 
> She was a woman who reportedly dabbled in magic and sorcery, which was how she gained her status as a ruler. Obviously I took this and interpreted it as 'miko', which may or may not be accurate.
> 
> It never specifically says in any accounts I've read that she was a seer, but again I embellished. It is also a fact that she ruled alone, an unmarried woman.
> 
> Her role in the history of Japan is subject to a lot of debate. Most records we have about her come from China, and some conflict with the few Japanese accounts available.
> 
> You may also find her listed as Himiko. So I guess there's even debate as to her real name, or maybe just the pronunciation. But anyway, that's the vague story of Empress Pimiko.


	9. Of Compromise and Court Women

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another mini-history lesson before we get into this chapter:
> 
> -Dengaku: A rustic form of dance performed in villages during the harvest in ancient Japan. Usually performed in front of the village shrine, as dance was considered a direct communication between man and the gods.
> 
> As far as I know, the dance could consist of anything content-wise and was not restricted to any one form. Also we must remember that it is not 'dance' in the modern, informal style we might think of. It was slow and controlled motions, elegant gestures made mostly with the hands.
> 
> This form of dance would later come to influence Noh plays in the time of Oda Nobunaga. The dances were also story-like, in that each told a certain tale through movement.
> 
> -Fan etiquette: The folding paper fan was actually invented in Japan in the 6th century and commonly carried by Heian nobles in formal situations. Up until now I've been pretty much neglecting the mention of this element, with the exception of a snippet in the first court scene.
> 
> I want to go into depth with it now as Kagome is forced into encounters with more and more nobles of the court. The fan was a very intricate thing, so bear with a little explanation here so that you can adequately understand what is going on.
> 
> The number of folds in a fan was indicative of social status within the court in the Heian period. I believe one could have up to 25 folds and the higher the number the greater the social standing of the person.
> 
> But fans were also used as a subtle form of communication. Cocking the wrist this way or that way, angling the fan to or away from oneself, the number of times the fan is waved, and the position of the fan relative to the body. All of it was significant in conveying subtle meanings and messages. It was used chiefly among the court women, as might well be guessed.
> 
> I think you can see well enough where I will be going with it, and I will explain what each movement means as I go along. I'm really looking forward to writing fan scenes, and I hope you look forward to reading them.

Kagome was still.

Kagome was very, very still.

Inuyasha stared in a blank sort of horror down into the pale, placid face of the girl in his arms. It felt like it had been forever since she had last moved. Time crawled forward with agonizing torpidity.

He shook her again, telling himself that this time she would get up. She would get up and he would yell at her for whatever had just happened and she would yell back. She would get up.

But Kagome did not get up. Her limp limbs flailed pathetically at the jostling and then stilled once more. She lay like broken doll in his hold, pale and fragile and lifeless.

There was a sharp, sharp twinge in the hanyou's gut and one of his clawed hands rose to clutch at it. It felt like he was being stabbed. It hurt.

"Kagome."

And then her eyes were open. Wide open and staring hard at something far beyond him. Inuyasha jerked slightly in his shock, feeling almost sick with a sudden rush of lightness and the easing of the knot in his innards.

"Kagome! Are you-!"

He cut himself off. Her focus was not on him at all and her lips moved ever so slightly, forming a stream of silent words. Inuyasha leaned in closer, hoping to catch whatever it was that she was muttering.

Her eyes shifted over to meet his, abruptly focusing. Inuyasha was unable to turn away. Her eyes were a shade of intense, mercurial gray he had never seen before, opened so wide that he could see the whites all the way around. He had never known that such a color even existed.

Suddenly there was a blue glow blocking the gray, spreading over the surface of her eyes like a fine film. It was the glow of Kagome's spiritual powers, Inuyasha remembered, jerking back to hold her at arm's length as her energy sparked lightly against his youki.

"The kami have granted their blessing to the hanyou Inuyasha, that he might rule as Tennō under their approval," Kagome intoned, her words crackling with the force of her spiritual energy. "Follow him, and the whole of this great Japan will flourish. Fail to heed his rule, and you bring about your own destruction."

Inuyasha stared wide-eyed at the girl as her eyes fluttered shut, the glow fading abruptly. The pressing feeling of her aura faded, as well, returning to the slight hum of power that always surrounded her.

Kagome sat up. She merely sat up on her own, freeing herself from his hold. She turned to him with an idiotically pleased grin spread all over her features, and Inuyasha felt his left eyebrow twitch spasmodically.

"Convincing, right? I probably won't say exactly that, but something along those lines," Kagome said excitedly, the stunned look on his face telling her she had pulled off the bit well. "It was good, right, Inuyasha-sama?"

Inuyasha was silent, staring hard at her. There was a slight tick developing in the right side of his face, Kagome noticed. He did not look quite so pleased as she had hoped he would.

" _That…_ " he snarled, and Kagome flinched at the roughness of his voice. "Was an _act_?"

"…yes?" Kagome said uncertainly, wondering where exactly she had gone wrong. She could practically feel the vibrations of the impending explosion.

"What in the seven hells, woman!?"

A cushion flew to connect solidly with her face before she could even think to dodge. The force of it nearly knocked her backwards, and she stared wide-eyed up at the fuming hanyou towering over her.

"Dammit! I thought you were dead, you moron! That wasn't fucking funny!"

She had just been screwing with him the entire time. And to think he had been…he had been…Dammit!

"It wasn't meant to be _funny_ , Inuyasha-sama," Kagome said weakly, slightly disheartened at how badly her idea had fallen through. "And I thought you'd be able to sense that I wasn't hurt and you would figure out what I was doing from there."

Inuyasha froze on the verge of storming into another tirade, mouth open and clawed finger pointed accusatorially at her. He had not sensed her vitals. Why had he not sensed her vitals?

He could hear it all well enough now. The quiet, even thrumming of her pulse. The almost imperceptible whooshing of air as her lungs expanded and contracted. So why had he missed it before if she were merely faking it all?

He glanced down at the girl who was watching him with sullen tentativeness as she waited for him to continue his rant, his mind wandering almost willfully away from the question. She looked pathetic. All hunched over and frowning like that.

Inuyasha averted his gaze with a huff, refusing to feel bad for having yelled at her. She deserved to squirm a little for pulling such a dumb stunt.

The image of her pale, still face rose unbidden in his mind's eye. Abruptly the burn of his irritation chilled. His eyes strayed back to her pouting form, observing the gentle rise and fall of her chest with each breath. Somehow he could not bring himself to finish his tirade.

"So?" Inuyasha huffed at length, slouching back to observe her while tucking his hands into the long sleeves of his karaginu.

He quirked one heavy, dark brow expectantly, telling himself that he was simply in a charitable mood or something. That was why he was sparing her his wrath for the moment. That was definitely it.

Kagome stared blankly at him. "So… _what_ , Inuyasha-sama?"

" _So_ I'm assuming there's some sort of twisted explanation for that idiotic display," Inuyasha ground out with terrible patience. "And if there's not I suggest you start running now."

Kagome's eyes darted up to his face for a moment, surprised that he did not intend to continue scolding her. The hanyou gazed pointedly away from her, arms and legs crossed and hidden deeply within the folds of his karaginu and sashinuki. He seemed…unsettled, somehow.

She felt a swift, sharp twinge of guilt. He had been worried about her. That was where all of this was coming from. She had been thoughtless, and he had been worried.

She considered apologizing, but another glance at him told her that all he would hear from her right now would be an explanation. Anything else would just rile him up again.

"Well, as you know, I was with Midoriko-sama today," Kagome began. "She told me the story of Pimiko-sama. Do you know it?"

Inuyasha grunted his assent, leaning towards her just slightly to listen. Kagome nodded in return, quietly gratified to see him loosening up.

"Midoriko-sama told me that story," she said. "And suddenly an idea just… _occurred_ to me. Back in my village, when the harvests were still good, I was allowed to participate in the Dengaku. They let me do it even when I was very little, because they always thought the kami would be most willing to heed the prayers of a miko.”

“I don't think I was really anything special as far as all that goes, but either way I loved being able to join in the dances. And my favorite character was that of the man who was said to have founded our village, Kiyomichi-sama.”

“The story passed down in my village told of him journeying across the whole of Japan, a lone holy man seeking out the innate truths of the world. But he came to the spot on which our village now stands and was given an inspiration by the kami, who put into his mind the thought that eventually the people inhabiting that land would realize a great destiny.”

“Kiyomichi-sama took this to heart and built up our village. After a little pleading I convinced the villagers to let me play out Kiyomichi-sama during the Dengaku.”

“I was so excited, and I learned to tremble and shake and collapse to mimic the divine inspiration that the kami gave to Kiyomichi-sama. The villagers all thought I was convincing because of the way in which I manipulated my powers during the act, and let me do the part every year at the beginning of the harvest, despite the oddness of a woman playing a man's role.”

“Do you understand, Inuyasha-sama?"

Inuyasha stared blankly at her for a long moment.

"Not a fucking thing."

Kagome deflated. She frowned, mentally sorting through her own words for some sort of clarity. She absently tugged at a loose strand of hair hovering near her face as she contemplated how to continue.

"Well, Pimiko-sama was a lone woman, and yet people were willing to follow her, right?" Kagome said. "But why did people follow her so willingly?"

"Her visions," Inuyasha supplied slowly, his brow knitting as he attempted to follow her line of thought. "The kami showed her the future or something, right?"

"Exactly," Kagome affirmed. "The kami gave her visions and people followed her. The kami gave a sort of vision to Kiyomichi-sama and he settled down to build our village. People are willing to follow the kami and those they believe to be blessed by the kami, correct?"

Inuyasha did not respond, his eyes widening slightly as realization began to dawn. Kagome, beaming enthusiastically, did not seem to require a response. She pressed on eagerly.

"So, you see, Inuyasha-sama, if you had the kami on your side, or at least the appearance of such, wouldn't the courtiers be much more willing to follow you, despite their reservations and personal interests?”

“And I know how to act a vision! Whether you'll admit it or not, you were convinced just now! And if I can convince the court that, as your servant, I have been blessed by the kami with the same foresight as Pimiko-sama, then won't they be far less likely to oppose you?”

“I'll play as your liaison to the divine, Inuyasha-sama, and with the authority that lends you, we can begin to change things!"

Inuyasha stared at her for a long moment, his features contorted in disbelief.

"You're insane," he declared succinctly, shaking his head.

"What!?" Kagome cried, bristling as the bubble of her excitement was so tactlessly burst.

"You really think there's a chance in all the seven layers of hell that you can pull this off in court?" Inuyasha interrupted, pinning her with a gaze as hard as stone. "Sure, they're a bunch of idiots and assholes, but they aren't that gullible."

"I fooled you, didn't I?" Kagome sniped, irritated by his condescension.

Certainly she knew that there were holes in her in her plan, but there was no way that she would ever be able to help him do anything if he was just going to casually dismiss her.

"That doesn't count," Inuyasha snapped in return, further irritated at the reminder. "I was just thrown off for second since you did something so weird."

"That's the point, though!" Kagome said. "It's so unexpected that they'll hardly think to question it."

"You just don't get it, Kagome. They're not some tiny bunch of backwoods villagers willing to see the work of the kami in every stupid rainstorm. They're gonna question anything that's different.”

“And you can throw around the names of the kami until your mouth bleeds, but they're not gonna believe a damned thing if you don't back it up. And some of them won't believe it even if you do."

Kagome was silent, unable to summon up any more words in her defense.

She shifted uncomfortably, feeling stung and foolish. And here she had been so hopeful and felt herself so clever for thinking up something this outrageous. Something that she had been so certain would help Inuyasha.

Yet he only saw her as some superstitious little commoner, unable to get out of her small mindset enough to understand the world in which she found herself. It stung, perhaps more than it should have. Was she really still so ignorant?

She risked a glance up at the hanyou from beneath her lashes. He was scowling off at some point beyond her, irritation written in the deep furrow of his dark brows. Had she truly troubled him that much?

It was ridiculous. She had just finally gotten back in his good graces. Perhaps he was regretting their partnership now. Perhaps he was even regretting their fledging friendship.

"I'll prove it to them!" Kagome blurted without thinking.

Inuyasha's focus returned to her even as her own eyes widened. She had not meant to say anything. She just hated the thought of him being disappointed in her. She had to prove herself.

"I…still believe that my idea is a valid one," she forced herself to press on. "So I will prove it to you, too, Inuyasha-sama. I'll do it, and I'll find a way to make all of the courtiers believe me. I don't know how, but I will definitely, _definitely_ do it. So…"

 _So please don't give up on me already_ , Kagome finished silently. She met his gaze and held it, willing him to believe her. He sighed, pressing a clawed hand to his temple.

"Listen, woman…"

"Please, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome cut him off, sensing a denial.

Inuyasha turned away from her with low growl. Kagome waited anxiously, hands clenching in the fabric of her hakama where they rested in her lap.

"It's getting late," he said at length. "Just…go back and sleep, alright?"

"Does that mean you're willing to let me try this?" Kagome said, refusing to let it drop.

"It _means_ I'm done talking about it, wench," Inuyasha snapped, but the unyielding expression on her face told him that she would not be put off. "Dammit, woman! Fine.”

“You go think about it for a while. I'll call you back in two days, and if you've come up with a good way to get them all to buy your act, I'll let you go through with it. If not, you drop the stupid thing and never mention it again."

Kagome needed only the briefest of moments to consider this. "Alright."

"Feh. Whatever," the hanyou tossed off. "Just…go now."

Kagome nodded, trying hard to hide her hurt at his eagerness to be rid of her. She would just have to prove herself, if that was what he needed to trust her fully. She would prove herself as many times as was necessary to get him to accept her at his side.

She rose and turned to leave, calling softly over her shoulder as she went, "Goodnight, Inuyasha-sama. Sleep well."

There was no answer, but she had not particularly expected one. She steeled herself, determined that when she returned here in two days she would fix things.

Inuyasha watched her departure from the corner of his eyes, gratified when her figure at last disappeared through the hanging of the entryway. He reclined back into the mass of cushions, relieved to be alone to consider things.

It wasn't the worst idea, despite what he had said. It had several points in its favor that he could think of, though that still left the gaping flaws that he had pointed out.

So if it was not the stupidity of the idea, then what in the seven hells was irritating him about this so damned much? The moment that she had made clear her little plan he had hated it. He had been driven to put a knife in the heart of it no matter what, even if it meant discouraging her.

He wouldn't ever have thought Kagome capable of coming up with something like that. He could still recall clearly how nervous she had been to lie about the details of her first mission. And now she thought to deceive the entire court and perhaps blaspheme the kami in the process.

It was too much. Inuyasha had no great reverence for the divine, as it had never done anything much for him, but he knew enough of Kagome to know that she lived her life in honor of it. For her to propose such a thing…it was hard to avoid the thought that life here in court might be changing her somehow. 

Inuyasha growled quietly, deciding that he did not want to think about it anymore. He closed his eyes, anticipating the calm darkness behind his lids.

Only to jerk back upright when, rather than cool blankness, he was greeted yet again by the image of Kagome’s limp form, lifeless in his arms. He snarled, chucking a cushion into a nearby vase. The fine clay workmanship shattered, and he felt a savage sort of satisfaction.

He did not want to think about this anymore. He did not want to recall the complete blankness that had stolen over him, robbing him of even his superior youkai senses. And he certainly did not want to think about that fool girl anymore.

He would go to see Kikyou, he decided suddenly. He had been preoccupied and neglectful towards her recently. He would go and sit and talk with her. Kikyou was always calm, unruffled no matter what the circumstances. He could understand her.

Inuyasha nodded, affirming it to himself. He stood and exited the room quickly to go see his future Empress.

* * *

Kagome did not sleep well that night. Her mind buzzed with considerations concerning her plan and the discussion she had had with Inuyasha. Her thoughts did not quiet sufficiently enough for her to sleep peacefully until the early hours of the morning.

She awoke to the sad realization that she had no more answers than when she had gone to sleep. A stretch of hazy contemplation in the quiet light of morning brought her to the conclusion that she wanted to go to see Midoriko. The elder woman had an air of wisdom to her that Kagome was certain would be useful in this dilemma of hers.

She redressed in her miko robes and combed out her hair before going out to wash up in the well behind her residence. It was only as she began to walk towards the main gate of the Fujiwara compound that she realized that she really did not have the freedom to spend her day doing as she wished.

Kagome was, after all, Kikyou's lady-in-waiting. She had to be around in case Kikyou should happen to require her. For that matter, it was slightly odd that the future Empress had not had her woken up so that she might do her ritual morning scrubbing of the halls.

Chafing slightly at the constraint, Kagome shuffled back into the residence to find out her instructions for the day. The moment she entered the main hall, she ran straight into a large group of chattering female servants. They turned almost as one to stare at her, and Kagome froze.

It took her a long moment to get past her mortification and find words.

"Ah…excuse me, has Kikyou-sama informed any of you of my instructions for the day?" she ventured, half-expecting them all to turn tail and run.

It was foolish of her to have forgotten that the court still hated her just because she had managed to make…something sort of like peace with Inuyasha.

"Kikyou-sama is still asleep," came a reply so unexpected that Kagome nearly jumped.

It was one of the younger girls within the group, and a few of the other women turned rather scandalized looks on her as well. She ignored them and continued.

"She was entertaining a guest until late last night, and she probably won't rise until noon or so. You're free to do what you want until then."

Kagome stared blankly at her for a stretch, too surprised to take in the words. She bowed hurriedly when she was finally able to comprehend it, flushing at her own rudeness and forgetting that it was inappropriate to bow to someone who was technically lower in station than herself.

"Thank you!" she blurted, before turning and nearly fleeing the residence.

When she was finally at a safe distance from Kikyou's compound, Kagome slowed her pace. Her heart, however, continued to pound loudly in her ears. It was ridiculous how giddy she was over a simple address from a young servant girl.

But none of the women had snubbed her as she had become accustomed to, though a few had sent her some rather wary looks. Kagome could not stop grinning like a fool, even as she wondered what could have caused such a turn of events.

Vaguely she recalled Inuyasha having mentioned that Miroku and Sango had been busy spreading counter-rumors. Perhaps they had finally reached even the far corner of the servants in the Fujiwara residence. Kagome had to bite back a squeal of joy, thanking every deity she knew of for the good friends that were working so hard for her.

Before she had even realized it, she had passed under the first torii of the court temple. She blinked, surprised, before trying to sober the tone of her thoughts to something more appropriate for sacred ground. She climbed the steps slowly, closing her eyes and breathing in the cool shade of the tall trees overshadowing the path.

In a far more collected state she passed under the second torii and drifted off to the left, glancing reverently at the two komainu as she passed. She reached the manmade pond and quickly cleansed her hands and mouth with the water, shivering at the chill of it. It was not snowing, but the day was still a cold one.

Rubbing her hands together to take the chill from them, she started towards the main hall of the shrine. Abruptly her steps slowed as she realized that Midoriko might not even be in the temple. She had no appointment with the elder miko, and it was likely that as a court spiritualist she had plenty of other duties to attend to.

She frowned, moving ritually through the process of clapping twice to alert the kami of her presence and bowing to show her respect for their presence. She wondered what she should do if the elder miko was out for the day.

Her worries, however, proved pointless the next moment. Kagome felt a wash of déjà vu as she rose from her bow to once again find Midoriko standing serenely in the entryway of the main hall, as if she had simply been there all along.

"I had a feeling you would wish to speak with me today," she spoke, answering the question before Kagome had even thought to ask it.

"You have premonitory powers, Midoriko-sama?" she said wonderingly, her eyes widening.

"No, nothing so grand as that. Simply feelings every now and again," Midoriko said, waving a dismissive hand. "I am certain that you, too, will begin to get them as you learn more. As you begin to understand the flow of the world."

That said, she turned and disappeared into the main hall, motioning vaguely for Kagome to follow. She stood still for a long moment, awed. It would be wonderful if that were true, she reflected, but somehow it was hard to imagine that she would ever be as wise as this ineffable woman.

Slowly she trailed after her. Midoriko was standing patiently before a door hanging on the right side of the room, waiting for her. She pulled the hanging aside, gesturing for Kagome to pass through.

Kagome complied and found herself on one of the many patterned stone walkways that trailed between the various parts of the shrine. Midoriko joined her on the path, leading her quietly along for a ways until they reached a small, open pavilion.

It was just on the edge of the trees surrounding the temple, and a gentle trickling alerted Kagome to a small stream that flowed just around its sides. Obviously a trench had been dug to get the water to flow in such an unusual manner, but somehow it felt natural enough.

Midoriko stepped carelessly through the stream, not even bothering to lift the hem of her robes to keep them from getting wet. Kagome followed her example, fighting back a shudder at the biting chill of the water. Midoriko had not so much as blinked at it.

The circle of the pavilion was dirt-floored, much like the buildings in Kagome's village. The low walls that defined the edges were a dull brown in color, topped by thin, undecorated pillars that held up the four-cornered roof. A large stone statue of the sun kami Amaterasu sat in the center of the space, dominating it.

Kagome paused to study the intricacy of the workmanship in the statue. Every detail down to the teeth of the combs in Amaterasu's long, straight hair had been laboriously carved. It was amazing.

The regal, inhumanly beautiful kami was shown standing, layers of rich fabric draped elegantly over her slender form. Her hair hung loose to her ankles, decorated by several ornate combs. She wore little in the way of jewelry, and the rays of the sun radiated forth from her smiling brow.

"It is beautiful, isn't it?" came Midoriko's reverent voice, her brow furrowed with the weight of some emotion Kagome could not quite comprehend. "I was allowed the great pleasure of knowing the artist who created it.”

“It took him several years to finish, and every day he worked on it as if it were the very purpose of his existence. It was an inspiring thing to behold."

"Ah," Kagome replied softly, considering this. It certainly did seem to hold the weight of a human life behind it somehow.

"Now, what was it that you sought me out for today?" Midoriko asked, settling gracefully onto the dirt floor.

Kagome stared at her for a moment, finding it odd that a woman of such obvious good breeding could sit so casually in the dirt. Still Midoriko did not seem to mind much, or else did not even consider it, as she gazed evenly up at her.

"I was hoping that you could tell me more of Pimiko-sama," Kagome replied, sinking down to kneel beside the woman.

"Hmmmm," Midoriko hummed thoughtfully, tilting her head slightly to consider the girl. "You wish to follow in Pimiko-sama's venerable foot steps, then?"

"Ah…yes, in a manner of speaking," Kagome answered tentatively, a little discomfited by the sharp attentiveness in her eyes.

"I knew that that would be the sort of path you would choose," Midoriko said softly, more to herself than to Kagome. "You make things very difficult for yourself, Kagome."

"I never presumed to think any of my aims would be easy to achieve, Midoriko-sama," Kagome offered, as the elder woman seemed somehow melancholy.

"Yes, of course. You are a clever girl, after all," Midoriko assented with something like resignation. "This is simply the way things must be."

She fell silent for a stretch of time, studying Amaterasu with eyes that encompassed an entire lifetime. Kagome was left to observe her quietly, wondering at the regret that deepened the lines around her eyes and mouth. At length she seemed to conquer the feeling, pushing it back and regaining her usual serenity.

"You know, of course, that you may come to me whenever you are in need, Kagome," Midoriko said, breaking the silence. "I wish to take full responsibility for you in all matters. I would like to help you as much as possible."

"Ah…uh, yes. Thank you, Midoriko-sama," Kagome replied, momentarily struck dumb.

She could hardly see why this woman would feel such a need to tend to her. It was not as if they knew one another particularly well, though Kagome was admittedly awed by the woman's abilities.

"Back to Pimiko-sama, then," Midoriko said, cutting short her thoughts. "Was there anything in particular that you wished to know of her?"

"What sort of things did she foresee?" Kagome asked, forcing her mind back to her original purpose. "What predictions did she make?"

"Well, by all accounts that I have heard, she foresaw a great many things," Midoriko said. "Wars, invasions, famines, storms, births, deaths, good harvests, bad harvests. The kami allowed her the knowledge of many things that she might lead her people."

"And no one ever…questioned her visions?"

"I suppose there must have been those who questioned her," Midoriko replied thoughtfully. "After all, it is difficult for most to believe something they can not experience directly.”

“However, she made predictions on things that no person without divine insight could have known. By virtue of making predictions on matters that were indisputable in nature, she made herself infallible in the eyes of her people."

"Indisputable..." Kagome echoed meditatively, mulling this over.

"You are in some sort quandary? You have that air of a soul with a problem. That seeking sort of feeling," Midoriko commented, watching her face closely.

"Yes," Kagome agreed, nodding.

"Then perhaps you should simply ask me the question outright, rather than dancing about it in this manner," Midoriko suggested. "I am certain that would be a far more effective way of finding a solution."

"Most likely. But…it is not something I really want to tell you, Midoriko-sama, if you will pardon my insolence in saying so," Kagome admitted, slightly shamefaced. "And besides, if at all possible, I would like to be the one to come up with a solution. I do not…somehow I do not think I should depend on anyone else for it."

"That is an awfully suspicious thing to say, Kagome," Midoriko said, a faint warning lacing her tone. "You make it sound as though your thoughts are on a questionable path."

"They might be," Kagome said softly, turning her gaze towards the ground. "No, not 'might'. I know that what I am considering is not only deceptive in the extreme, but perhaps blasphemous, as well.”

“Still, I cannot help the feeling that I have to do it. That I am _supposed_ to do it, for a purpose that far surpasses my own sense of slighted morality."

Midoriko regarded the girl skeptically, shaking her head slightly. It seemed that things were beginning already, and it was troubling. She had not thought that fate would start to weave its web around this girl so suddenly.

"I can no more pass judgment on your decisions than anyone else. Your only judges are your self and the kami. So if you believe your cause to be just…well, I will make no arguments," the elder miko said softly. "However, I would ask that you meditate here with me for a time. Calm your mind and truly affirm within your self that your decision is worth the things you will sacrifice to it."

"I would like that," Kagome agreed, nodding.

"Alright, then," Midoriko said. "You have told me that you already understand well enough the techniques of meditation, and there can be no better place for it than this. But I would ask that you attempt to fill your mind this time with both everything and nothing, and see what comes to you from that void."

Kagome nodded, considering this as her eyes slid closed. She began her breathing techniques, feeling the slow flow of air throughout her body. It was remarkably easy to slip away from her self in the atmosphere of that small pavilion. Soon she was filled with the trickling of the stream and the chirping of the birds and the rustling of the wind through the bows of the trees.

Gently she put forth the question of her plan to the world, like pushing a small boat out into a stream. She listened carefully for any change in the pulse of the surrounding nature that might be her answer. But there was no alteration. The gentle rhythms of the world moved forward as usual.

Kagome posed the question again, this time turning inward to see if any conflict might be found. Of course there was that small splotch of red, her conscience's indignation that she could even consider doing such a thing. But more than that, greater by far than that, was the great black sense of calm and right.

Certainly she was willing to pay for the trespasses she was going to commit, and she expected her personal punishment would be swift and harsh. Still there was the feeling that what she was doing was greater than herself, and that she had to do it no matter the harm she might do to herself in the long run.

Solid in her resolve, Kagome once more surrendered conscious thought and drifted back into nature. It was a liberating feeling, to be able to blend for a time with the elements. Even when raging in storm or disaster they were always so firm and real and undeniable.

It could have been an eternity or merely a few moments later that a hand on her shoulder forced Kagome to return to herself. She blinked several times before she could focus on the form of Midoriko standing over her. There was a faint smile on the lips of the elder woman.

"You have quite the aura when you meditate," she remarked approvingly. "Like the ocean, I think. We should meditate together from now on. It helps me."

Kagome flushed, both embarrassed and flattered by the praise. To think that she could help this sage woman in any way. She nodded in agreement with Midoriko's suggestion.

"I suppose that you have decided, then?" Midoriko asked, and Kagome's smile dimmed as she recalled the question at hand.

"Yes," she answered. "I still intend to go through with it."

"I had thought as much," Midoriko sighed, and in a surprising gesture her hand reached down to stroke the hair back from Kagome's forehead.

"I'm sorry," Kagome managed, moved almost to tears by the homesickness that the small action gave rise to.

"No need to apologize. You are simply following your own path, as we all must if we hope to live fully," Midoriko said soothingly. "Besides, I understand well enough that things are hardly that simple here. It is not always a question of right and wrong. There is so much of the world that is neither and both all at once."

She offered her hand to the younger miko. Kagome accepted it gratefully and got to her feet. Looking to the sun, she realized that it had probably been some time since she had come to the temple. She felt a dull spike of worry, wondering if Kikyou would be cross with her for having wandered off on her own for so long.

"Ah! I am terribly sorry, Midoriko-sama, but I will have to beg your pardon yet again. I have to go attend to another duty within the court," Kagome said, bowing apologetically.

"Do not worry over it," Midriko said. "In light of the time we have just spent together, I think it will be necessary that I alter my lessons a bit in order to fit you.”

“You are more to deal with than I could have anticipated, even after my initial reading of your aura. Besides, in your current agitated state, you are hardly fit to be trying to learn anything from me. Go on, then. I wish you as much serenity as possible until our next meeting."

"Thank you, Midoriko-sama, for your time and your good wishes."

Kagome bowed deeply at the waist, feeling that truly the kami must be favoring her to allow her to associate with such a woman. She rose and turned to go, stepping through the cool waters of the stream without so much as flinching.

"Kagome."

She turned back at the sound of her name. Midoriko still stood with the circle of the pavilion, and it struck her as she looked back that the elder woman bore a remarkable resemblance to the statue of Amaterasu standing beside her.

"I know you will do what you feel is best, whatever I might say. However, do exercise caution if at all possible. I…have a feeling I will come to be quite fond of you, so do me this favor."

Kagome nodded slowly. Somehow it sounded like an apology in her ears. With one last glance at the elder miko's solemn figure, as still as that of the stone statue beside her, Kagome turned and rushed back to the Fujiwara residence.

Her mind buzzed with half-formed questions. That Midoriko was a good, noble woman was unquestionable. Somehow, though, her behavior towards Kagome did not seem to add up. There was something Kagome could not quite pin down beneath all of her words.

She shook her head roughly, pushing her wayward thoughts aside. Midoriko had been nothing but kind in offering her assistance in this and all future matters. That she as a high court spiritualist would extend her hand so graciously to someone in Kagome's position was almost too much to ask.

Midoriko most certainly did not deserve to be questioned. And Kagome would not question her, no matter what silly notions her wayward feelings gave rise to.

Rather she turned her thoughts once more to the problem at hand. She had gained no real answers from her time with Midoriko, but had at least secured in her own mind her feelings and intentions. It would be easier to move forward now that she was certain of herself.

There were also several vague notions simmering in the back of her mind, awakened by her meditations. There were blurred images of trees and snow and water and sunlight and ice. Nothing definitive and certainly nothing sensible, but it was something.

Given time Kagome was certain that she would be able to puzzle through it all. She merely hoped that two days would be enough time.

* * *

Kagome was told to go and wait in Kikyou's chamber upon her return to the residence. The servant, a woman that the miko could only assume had heard the counter-rumors from her vaguely apologetic manner, informed her that Kikyou had woken about an hour ago and had been calling for her ever since.

Kneeling stiffly on the tatami mats of Kikyou's grand chamber, Kagome fretted silently over her blunder. She wondered how upset with her Kikyou-sama would be, and what punishment this little faux pas would earn her. She was _alread_ y assigned to cleaning the halls every morning…

The shoji screen which Kagome faced slid slowly open. Kikyou rose, entered the room, and knelt to slide the shoji shut once more before continuing. She eyed the miko silently from head to toe, her expression as stolid as ever.

Abruptly the village girl realized that she was still in her fine miko robes. She had not been allowed time in which to change into her serving yukata before being ushered into the noblewoman's room. She hastily bent into a deep bow.

"I am sorry for my appearance, Kikyou-sama. I did not have time to change before coming to see you," she offered humbly.

"It is of no consequence," Kikyou said, dismissing the apology with a casual wave of her hand. "Perhaps it is even appropriate at the moment."

She knelt primly down before Kagome, the fine silver layers of her juni-hito pooling effortlessly around her. Kagome frowned, rising slowly up from her bow. It was the first time she could ever remember having been on the same level with the Future Empress.

"You are…not cross with me for going off on my own?" the village girl ventured.

"Not particularly. It would be troublesome to waste time with such an emotion over such a trivial matter," Kikyou replied. "Besides which, it is high time that I ceased treating you as a common servant."

"And here I thought I was your lady-in-waiting," Kagome could not keep herself from retorting, slightly irked somehow at the indirect admission.

"You are not a stupid girl. Do me the courtesy of not affecting to be one," Kikyou said, her eyes sharp though her voice was calm. "We both know full well that I have been using you in the manner of a maid, if not worse."

"Yes," Kagome admitted. "But then, why change now? I can not say that I understand, Kikyou-sama."

The appearance of a slight line between her dark, elegant brows was the only indication of Kikyou's discontent. Her gaze became even more steady than it had been, trained on Kagome's own. She could feel the weight of some great frustration behind the force of her unwavering brown eyes.

"As you currently are, you have become a burden to my Lord," she said at length, her mouth tightening around the edges at the admission. "Your bumbling about the court in such an ignorant manner troubles him.”

“Thus, if I take you and educate you in the ways of the court, if I bring you up to the level of a courtier, he will no longer be forced to trouble his mind with you. You will become a commonality and will no longer occupy his thoughts unduly. He has enough to attend to, after all, without your added weight."

Kagome stared at the woman for a long moment, her eyes gone wide. Her hands clenched where they rested in her lap, her shoulders tensing.

"Inuyasha-sama…told you I was a burden?"

"My Lord came to see me last night," Kikyou said, her eyes flashing briefly at Kagome's familiar address. "He mentioned that he had just met with you, and his manner was agitated and distracted the entire time we were together. It took no great leap in logic to determine that you were the root of the problem."

Kagome cast her eyes downwards, guilt gnawing at her innards. Somehow she always managed to become a problem for the hanyou, despite her best intentions.

"I'm sorry," she said softly.

"If you have time to waste feeling sorry, then use it to fix the problem instead," Kikyou said. "We will begin tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Kagome echoed, raising her gaze.

"A large group of noblewomen have decided to go on a carriage ride outside of the capital. They wish to dine beneath the rows of sakura trees planted just to the north of here, though I will not pretend to understand why when the trees are not even in bloom yet," Kikyou said, a thin coat of disdain on her words. "Either way, it will be tomorrow. You, my lady-in-waiting in earnest, shall accompany me on the outing."

Kagome's eyes widened until she felt they must take up at least half of her face.

"Tomorrow?" she said, her voice cracking around the word. "But isn't that too soon? I mean, I hardly know anything-!"

"What better way to teach a child to swim than to toss him in the ocean," Kikyou said coolly, and Kagome winced at the unforgiving imagery. "Besides, you at least know the rudimentary lessons, do you not? I can not imagine that you would have even been allowed into the capital were you as boorish in manner as most commoners."

"But this is hardly the same," Kagome protested, biting back a retort at the slight to her village. "I was taught the very basics, but I know there is a lot more etiquette involved in these sorts of situations.”

“There are people of various rankings that have to be treated in different manners. There are so many mistakes I could make that it hurts my head just to think about it."

"Then you will simply have to be very careful," Kikyou returned, unrelenting.

"It will be bad for you, as well, Fujiwara-sama, if I make an error while acting as your lady-in-waiting," Kagome pointed out.

"Do not concern yourself with my affairs," Kikyou said firmly. "I understand well enough my own situation and require no instruction from you. Now, you are dismissed. I will send a servant in the morning to wake you that we might ready ourselves appropriately."

Kagome hesitated, staring hard at the impassive woman. She wanted to continue arguing, to convince the Future Empress that there was no way that this could end well.

Still there was the feeling that she could quarrel with Kikyou until she was blue in the face without gaining any ground. Also there was the feeling that the woman was right.

If she did not start now, when would she start? She needed to learn how to be among these people and hesitation would not help. Perhaps Kikyou's methods were harsh, but they would undoubtedly prove to be the most effective. Necessity was the best teacher, after all.

Gazing at the woman's stoic profile, Kagome could not help but wonder if she had been different before the tragic fall of her family. Somehow it was not hard to imagine that those sharp brown eyes had once been much softer. More open.

And abruptly Kagome realized that she no longer felt the aversion towards this woman that had been there since their first meeting. Perhaps she even…respected her now. At the very least she was no longer rankled by the subservience which necessity forced her to show toward Kikyou.

It was simply impossible to think ill of her now that she knew what was behind it all. She had suffered. She had suffered through more in just her youth than most would be forced to suffer in their entire lifetimes. And still she had not allowed that suffering to twist her and make her cruel, as many undoubtedly would have.

Certainly she had become rigid and difficult to get along with. Certainly she had become too attached to the order of things, trying to control what things she could in the world.

But in the end she was not malicious. She had not targeted Kagome out of hatred, but rather because she believed that she was in the right in doing so.

Now that Kagome thought about it, Kikyou was technically the reason that Inuyasha was still speaking to her. She had been the first to point out to the hanyou that the rumors did not make sense. She had not blindly accepted all the chatter as fact, but had been so unfailingly fair towards Kagome as to give her the benefit of the doubt.

And here she was offering to train her in court etiquette so that Kagome might cease being a problem for Inuyasha, and all Kagome could do was argue and complain. Well, perhaps it was not so much an offer as an order, but it was still aid that the woman was not obligated to offer.

"You realize, of course, that I dismissed you several minutes ago," Kikyou said, bringing Kagome out of her thoughts. "If you wish to continue arguing the point with me, by all means do so, though you will get nowhere for all of your efforts. Do not, however, continue to sit there staring like a dullard at the kami only know what."

"Ah!" Kagome started, realizing that she had been staring. "Pardon me. I will take my leave."

She bowed hastily before standing to go. Still she hesitated at the shoji door, feeling guilty for having been so difficult with the woman who was trying to help her.

"Thank you, Kikyou-sama," she said at length, just loud enough that she knew the woman would hear.

Following which she promptly dashed from the room, ignoring even the etiquette of opening and closing the shoji properly in her haste.

In her hurry, however, she missed the widening of the future Empress' eyes at the words, spoken with such soft sincerity. She missed the way in which the woman stared after her for a long, silent stretch of time, her expression so utterly bewildered that one would have thought that she had never heard such a sentiment in her entire life.

* * *

The following morning Kagome was awoken early. Earlier even than when she had gotten up to clean the halls. When she groggily inquired as to why she was being roused at such an hour, the reply was that they had to prepare her for the gathering of the noblewomen. The gathering _at noon_.

Gazing hazily out her window at the not yet lighted sky of that morning, Kagome imagined that she finally understood why all women of good breeding looked so irritated. This was ridiculous.

She was ushered into a large room towards the back of the residence, the floor wooden rather than being composed of tatami mats as most were. There were only a couple of tiny windows high up on two of the walls, and a large wooden tub filled with steaming water dominated the center. Some sort of pleasant scent drifted up from the waters of the tub, soft and elegant.

Kagome was stripped down quickly and pushed into the tub by the several serving women attending her. Her protests that she could clean herself well enough fell on deaf ears as the women came at her from all angles with wash cloths, hair oils, perfumes, and the like.

They cooed over the fineness of her skin despite her years of hard work as they pushed her under and pulled her up from the warm waters. It seemed that the counter-rumors had taken full effect by that point, as no one made even the vaguest reference to her involvement with the wolf Lord. Kagome was oddly pleased at their kind attentions.

When her skin was positively raw and glowing with their vigorous scrubbing, the she was pulled from the tub and dried off from her toes to the ends of her hair. Wrapping a light robe about her small frame, they led her to yet another room through the back hallways of the residence.

This room was far more cluttered, and the light of the dawning day peered in from several windows as they arrived. Several mirrors, folding screens, and trunks were scattered about. The women pushed Kagome down to sit in front of a mirror before diving into the trunks, rapidly sorting through the various contents.

Soon they had laid out before her several golden hair combs, the layers of a deep red juni-hito, and a hand fan to match. Kagome stared at the items for a long moment, frowning.

"I…will not be wearing my miko robes?" she asked at length, looking to the women.

"That would hardly be appropriate for this gathering, Kagome-sama," scoffed one of the older women attending her.

"But…I have no idea how to do anything in one of these," Kagome protested, counting out the number of layers spread out before her.

There were fifteen layers. Fifteen layers of silk and embroidery to try and move in!

"Our ladyship made certain the two of you will have plenty of time to practice such things before the gathering begins," another woman assured her.

And then they were upon her once more, stripping off her robe and replacing it with the layers of the juni-hito. They took care to arrange each layer so that it hung correctly on her, tying and knotting and wrapping and pulling.

They then went to work on her hair, combing out the length of it until it shone like spun silk in the light. The layers nearest her fringe were twisted back with the aid of the combs, leaving the rest to hang freely down her back.

Lastly they coated her face in a fine layer of the pale powder Sango had once used on her. With a thin brush they dusted the lids of her eyes in a red to compliment that of her juni-hito. The very thinnest brush was brought out last and used to paint her lips a deep crimson with some sort of faintly gooey substance.

To cap it all off, they tied the delicate hand fan to her left wrist. Kagome slid it open and closed several times, toying with it idly. With a sigh she realized that it was yet another thing that she had no idea how to utilize properly. She felt her spirits sink a little, wondering if all of this would really be alright.

"Why don't you take a look and tell us what you think, Kagome-sama?" suggested a serving woman, observing her anxious demeanor.

"Ah, yes," Kagome replied absently, not particularly eager to see herself. She was certain that she would look ridiculous, like a child attempting to don adult clothing far before her time.

She nearly fell over at the sight that greeted her, stumbling back a step from the mirror. She crept forward slowly, carefully, to touch the glass, as if afraid that the image within it might vanish at any moment.

The woman contained within that looking glass could not possibly be Kagome. The woman there was elegant and composed and beautiful, poised and swathed in the layers of a juni-hito embroidered with the image of a graceful crane on a spring day. But the gray eyes gazing back at her from beneath red lids were most definitely her own.

"This…is amazing," she breathed, fingers tracing the outline of her reflection. “I look like a different person. Like…"

"Like you could actually be among that lot without worrying?" a servant woman filled in for her, stepping over to adjust one of the combs in her hair slightly.

"Thank you," said Kagome, beaming at the woman's reflection in the mirror. Perhaps this would not be so bad after all. At least she looked the part now.

"Not at all," replied the woman dismissively, stepping back to admire her work. "This is the job of a servant, after all. Besides which, you're having been allowed to do this means something to all of us."

Kagome tilted her head quizzically, looking at the serving woman's reflection in the mirror. "Something to you all?"

"Well, you're just the resident of some little village of no particular significance in the grand scheme of things, if you’ll pardon my saying so, but you're being allowed to join the high-ups, in essence," the woman replied. "You don't think that means something, Kagome-sama?"

"I…don't know," said Kagome thoughtfully, her brow wrinkling as she considered this. She had not taken the time to consider the situation in such terms.

"Well, not to put any extra pressure on you, Kagome-sama, but your presence here means a great deal to the servants in the court," the woman said earnestly. "You're here, serving the Tennō-sama, on your own merits, not just because you were born to it. It offers the hope that if one person can do it, maybe others of low birth can, too.”

“I mean, why do you think we were all so harsh on you over those rumors about the wolf Lord? It's hardly as if you would have been the first servant to bed a nobleman. But we were disappointed, you see. We thought you had messed up and wrecked it for all of us. But we know better now."

"I see," said Kagome faintly, her brow furrowing.

She had always just assumed the servants here in the court saw her as being on their own level. She had never thought that what she was attempting to do here was so grand as to mean that much to them either way.

It made sense, though. If she could manage to push through, she would leave a hole through which they might pass, as well. Her shoulders felt suddenly heavy with the weight of this revelation.

The shoji door to the room slid open, cutting through the slight tension brought on by the serving woman's mention of the rumors. Another servant bowed in the doorway, addressing Kagome.

"Fujiwara-sama wishes to see you now, Kagome-sama."

"Alright," Kagome replied, rising to go with the woman.

She paused, considering. Turning back, she bowed to all of the serving women in the room.

"Thank you all. I will definitely do my best."

She could hear the pleased and affectionate cooing and clapping that filled the room as she departed, but could hardly bring herself to feel glad for it.

She could feel the beginning throb of a headache in her temples, and Kagome could not help but wonder if this was too much pressure for one person to deal with all alone.

* * *

Kagome was led to Kikyou's chambers where the future Empress knelt regally on a cushion, awaiting her arrival. The noblewoman eyed her as she entered, at length giving a slight nod of approval.

"At least you will look the part," Kikyou said, unknowingly echoing Kagome's own thoughts.

The future Empress herself was dressed in a juni-hito of the deepest shade of blue, patterned all over with silver bellflowers. A matching hand fan was tied at her wrist and a head ornament of gold crowned her dark locks, strands dangling down from it to twine in her hair.

Her skin was naturally pale and thus needed no powder, but her lids had been dusted blue and her lips painted red. She looked as untouchably lovely as ever, and Kagome could not help but think such a regal beauty was perfectly suited to be the future Empress.

Kikyou made a gesture to the servant who had accompanied Kagome and the woman placed a set of geta sandals before her. She then bowed to both women before taking her leave, sliding the shoji closed to allow them privacy.

"Put those on and show me how you walk," Kikyou commanded, gesturing to the sandals.

Kagome complied, leaning down to slip the geta on over her tabi socks. She straightened back up and nearly stumbled, realizing that she could truly feel the weight of the fifteen layers when trying to balance on the wooden platform of the sandals. Flushing slightly at her mistake, she stiffened her shoulders in what she hoped was a regal manner and took a step forward.

Only to trip up again as her foot caught the hem of one of her longer layers. Kagome's face burned, but she doggedly continued across the room. She tripped several more times and could hardly bear to face Kikyou as she finished.

"Well, that was horrendous," Kikyou declared bluntly as she came to stand before her. "But I can not say that I expected anything better."

She rose to stand beside Kagome, sliding on her own sandals. Leisurely she began to walk the length of the room, speaking as she went.

"Keep your steps very measured, concentrating on each foot as it touches the ground. I realize that such small steps can become frustrating, but the juni-hito does not allow for much freedom in movement. Your posture is far too stiff, as well, and I can see you fighting the weight of the silk.”

“Do not fight it so much. Make certain you can feel the alignment of your spine all through your back and down to the soles of your feet. That way the layers will hang naturally, and you will appear graceful.”

“Never bow your head as you walk. It will make you appear uncertain, and you cannot afford that appearance at this time. Nor should you ever, as I saw you attempt to do, pick up the layers of your juni-hito. It is considered uncouth, and you will be mocked for it should you do so.”

“Finally, your footsteps are far too heavy. The geta make an abundance of noise naturally, but again you must fight against the weight of the layers and measure your steps. Now, come walk with me."

Kagome did so, joining her in her circuit around the room and trying to mimic her motions. It was terribly frustrating, keeping her steps so small when she was not used to it, but slowly she got it.

Aligning her spine, she did find that the layers hung much more naturally and that movement became easier. Still, it was a strain to keep her back so rigidly straight for such a long time.

"That will suffice, I suppose," Kikyou allowed after several circuits, turning from her observations to go kneel once more on her cushion. "Sit. There are other things that need be addressed before we go."

Kagome came to kneel before her, squirming to arrange the layers of her juni-hito comfortably around herself. Kikyou frowned disapprovingly, but did not deign to comment.

"Now, the women at this event will all be of relatively high status, coming principally from branches of the Minamoto, Taira, and Tachibana clans-"

"Sango-sama will be there?" Kagome broke in, excitement surging in her at the thought of being able to see her friend again after so long.

Kikyou cocked on delicate brow slightly at the outburst, and Kagome flushed. She could hardly afford to be forgetting her manners at a time like this.

"My apologies," she said, bowing her head.

"Yes. Attempt to keep your childish outbursts to a minimum, if at all possible," Kikyou returned. "And, yes, I believe the Tachibana woman will be present as well, along with several of her cousins from the clan.”

“But as I was saying, as the women are all of the same general high ranking, with a few exceptions here and there, the general rule will be to be as formal with them as possible.”

“If you can manage it, please attempt to be distant even with the Tachibana woman. The only way these women will accept you is if you prove to be irreproachable in your manners. Let them see no emotion, and they will have nothing to feed off of."

Kagome frowned. She made the women sound awfully fearsome. Like blood-thirsty monsters, or the like.

"Another important point: under no circumstances should you discuss court politics," Kikyou said firmly. "Should you feel the inclination, bite your tongue. Should you be asked, find a way to change the subject.”

“The situation in the court is far too…tentative for anything to be said on the matter without offending or inciting someone. So conceal your loyalties well, unless you want them used against you later on."

Kagome heard clearly the warning beneath this warning. She should not be flaunting her connection with Inuyasha, or she would likely earn herself enemies that she did not need. It would be good, as well, to remain in a relatively neutral position from which she could get a feel for the positions of the other women.

"Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, do you know anything about the etiquette of the fan?" Kikyou said, sliding open the fan tied to her own wrist.

"Nothing," Kagome replied, slightly shamefaced. Kaede had never had a fan with which to teach her in the village, nor had she ever thought it particularly necessary.

Kikyou's expression tightened ever so minutely, and Kagome imagined that if she were a woman of lesser breeding she would have groaned in exasperation. Instead she merely flicked her fan in a quick, agitated little motion.

"Fine, then. I should have expected nothing more. Listen carefully, as this will prove to be critical," Kikyou said. "Fans, among large groups of women such as this will be, speak far louder than words.”

“The smallest gesture made using one is significant in communicating ideas and feelings, so you must always be as attentive to the movements of others as you are to the ones you make yourself."

She raised her fan, fluttering it a few times before her face. Then she lowered it once more to chest level, flapping it again. Kagome followed each movement with her eyes, trying to get a feel for it.

"A fan above the chin indicates more certainty, or perhaps a more forceful tone. A fan below the chin is demure and more suited to polite conversation."

Kagome nodded. Kikyou tilted her fan towards Kagome, and then tilted it back towards herself.

"The angle of the fan, either towards oneself or away, indicates who a comment is being made in reference to. Towards is oneself. Away from is one of your companions."

With a quick flick of her wrist, Kikyou snapped her fan shut. She then slid it slowly open once more.

"An open fan means conversation is currently welcomed. A closed fan, however, indicates that the person no longer wishes to converse with you. Often it also means that the person in question feels you have slighted them in some way."

Now the future Empress waved the fan in a wide arc from left to right. She then repeated the motion to and away from herself.

"The former gesture is one of dismissal. It means the person no longer has any interest in whatever you may be saying or doing. The latter gesture indicates interest, and that they would like something more from you."

The fan came up to cover the lower half of her face. Kagome continued to nod and watch almost idiotically, praying that she would be able to remember it all. The fan then came down from her face to lay flat on the noblewoman's palm between the two of them.

"These are gestures of intimacy. A fan covering the face means that the person does not wish to be familiar with you, or else feels that you are being too familiar and should be more distant.”

“A fan laid flat between two people is an invitation to intimacy. It means the person would like to deal with you on more familiar level."

She flipped the fan to hang upside down in her hand. She then waved it several times in quick, sharp motions.

"As you might guess, this is not a friendly gesture. It is, rather, a gesture meant specifically to slight whomever it is directed at. The nature of its insult depends on the current conversation.”

“There is more, of course, but that is all I believe you will need to know for the time being. Anything that we have not covered you will have to make a guess at. If you can manage to remember everything, you should be fine."

Kagome glanced at her, feeling that in some obscure way the future Empress was attempting to encourage her. Kagome offered her at weak smile that she did not return. Still Kagome knew that Kikyou had every right to be putting pressure on her, as her own reputation was on the line, as well, but that she refrained from doing so out of her own sort of consideration.

Abruptly Kikyou rose, smoothing her robes in a small gesture that betrayed her unease. Kagome rose to follow her as she slid the shoji open, exiting the room. Several attendants awaited them just outside, joining them as they walked through the halls towards the gate to the residence.

As they exited the compound, Kikyou raised and opened her fan to hide the lower half of her face. She shot Kagome a meaningful look, and Kagome quickly mirrored the gesture. Together they walked along the paths leading out of the Inner Palace, accompanied by the attendants and heading toward the western gate.

Kagome squirmed a little in her skin at the stares they garnered as they went along their way. Kikyou and herself would have been conspicuous enough in such finery in the middle of the day, but the circle of attendants ringing them certainly did not help matters.

On the up side, while they all recognized Kikyou at a glance, they seemed not to have the faintest idea of who she was. Although, Kagome reflected, the time was fast approaching when she would have to remedy that.

The western gates came into sight in the distance, large and looming. Lined up before them were several ornate ox-pulled carriages, around which swarmed numerous women in all colors and styles of juni-hito. Even from far away Kagome could see the manic flapping and waving of colored hand fans, and she could feel her spine go rigid with nerves.

"It will be fine."

Kagome's eyes darted towards the sound of the voice. Kikyou had dropped back slightly to walk at her side, her unwavering brown gaze still turned steadily forward. She glanced at her from the corner of her eye.

"Do not work yourself into a panic. It will be fine."

Kagome stared at her, hardly able to comprehend that this woman would be so openly encouraging towards her. As the words sunk in she did begin to relax, reminding herself to breathe. She nodded gratefully at Kikyou before turning her gaze ahead, determined that she would pull this off.

The gates loomed closer, and the women milling about them seemed to turn as one entity to watch their approach. The flapping fans stilled slowly, several coming up to cover the expressions of their owners. All activity seemed to slow to a halt as Kikyou and Kagome at last reached the gates.

The entire group bent to bow almost as one. Kagome took a deep breath to quiet the fluttering in her stomach, lifting her chin. The lesson had begun.

"Good afternoon, cousins," Kikyou called just loudly enough to carry, acknowledging their greeting.

Kagome recalled from one of her first discussions with Sango that 'cousin' was the usual address of one noble to another, whether or not they came from the same clan. It stemmed from the idea that all those of noble birth could trace back their lineages to Amaterasu.

"Good afternoon, Fujiwara-sama," came the responding chorus, following which the women promptly resumed their movement and chatter.

Now, though, Kagome noticed the way in which they began to cluster together in numerous small groups, fans waving languidly as they whispered and chattered amongst themselves. Within several of the groups she caught brief glimpses of sharp fan gestures and pointed looks tossed in Kikyou's general direction. Several of the women separated out from the mass to approach them.

Kagome had to bite back the silly grin that threatened to split her face when she saw that Sango was among them, dressed in a juni-hito of pale green with her long hair hanging freely down her back. A very petite woman with the biggest, brightest brown eyes Kagome had ever seen walked at the taiji-ya's side, and Sango beamingly pointed Kagome out to the woman with a wave of her fan.

The woman smiled, as well, turning a kind gaze on her. Sango caught Kagome's eye then, hers eyes lighting as she waved her fan in two leisurely sweeps. Kagome could only assume this was a gesture of greeting and eagerly slid her own fan open to return it.

A sharp tap on the inside of her wrist stopped her. It was Kikyou's closed fan, and the noblewoman shot her a warning glance from beneath her dark lashes. Kagome sucked in a breath quietly, recalling that she was supposed to be acting politely formal with even Sango.

Bowing her head for a moment, she schooled her features into neutrality. When she raised her face once more, she was able to return the gesture with calm composure. Sango frowned slightly, but did not call her on this as she and the woman came to stand before them.

"Good morning, Fujiwara-sama, Kagome-sama," she greeted. "I know you, Fujiwara-sama, are familiar with my cousin, Tachibana Hisana, but I do not believe she and Kagome-sama have yet become acquainted."

Kikyou nodded, and Kagome bowed politely to the woman. The woman beamed in return, twisting her fan in a gesture of acknowledgement.

"It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Tachibana-sama," Kagome said.

"On my end, as well, Kagome-sama," Tachibana Hisana returned. "My cousin has told me so much of you since my return from assignment. And look at what a lovely little thing you are. You and Fujiwara-sama truly put the rest of us to shame."

"Not at all," Kagome demurred, having overheard this sort of banter go on even in her small village between women. "I can hardly hope to measure up in such a gathering as this."

"So modest," Hisana cooed, looking pleased.

Sango looked pleased, as well. The taiji-ya seemed to understand the purpose of her polite distance, and Kagome could positively feel the encouragement radiating off of her. Inwardly Kagome smiled. Even now Sango was still rooting for her.

"Kikyou-sama," called a voice, breaking through the relatively pleasant atmosphere around the four women.

They turned to look, and Kagome felt her shoulders stiffen at the sight of the Taira youkai woman that she had seen once before. Kagura was her name, she recalled. Glancing at Kikyou from the corner of her eye, Kagome could see in the tightening of her grip upon her fan that she, too, was less than pleased by the new arrival.

Her fan waving well above the height of her chin, the youkai woman strolled leisurely over to them in a juni-hito of the deepest black with golden embroidery. The ruby of her lips gleamed wetly in the light of day and for a brief flash Kagome had the horrible thought that it was blood staining them.

At her side shuffled a young, extraordinarily pale girl in a juni-hito of silver and blue embroidery. Rather than a fan, a small hand-mirror hung at her wrist.

Youki surrounded the object in Kagome's second sight, and it was clear that she, too, was a youkai. With large dark eyes she stared blankly out at them all, seeming to see both nothing and everything all at once.

A third woman was walking slightly behind these two off-putting females, looking rather uncomfortable at their proximity. She was both distinctly human and distinctly mousy looking, with shoulder length murky brown locks and dull brown eyes. Her juni-hito, however, attested to a great amount of wealth.

It was a bright golden hue with embroidery of ruby red, depicting the scene in which Amaterasu emerged from the cave to give light to the world. Several strings of jade pendants and pearls hung about her neck and upon her head sat an ornate crown of gold similar to Kikyou's. Kagome could hardly claim to be an expert on court fashions, but even to her the woman seemed to be overdoing it.

"Kagura-sama," Kikyou greeted, her formality more stiff than before. "Kanna-sama. Good afternoon."

"Good afternoon," Kagura returned, her fan flicking out in what nearly looked like a gesture of challenge rather than greeting.

The girl, Kanna, said nothing. She merely turned her empty gaze up to Kikyou's face and gave the faintest of nods.

"And to Minamoto-sama, as well," the future Empress amended as the woman joined them.

"Good afternoon, Fujiwara-sama," the woman returned, her voice as blusteringly pompous as her dress. "It is, as always, a pleasure. Tachibana-tachi-sama, as well."

Kagome noted her pointed lack of any acknowledgement of the two Taira women. Kagura did not seem bothered in the least by this slight, her smirk still resting easily on her lips. Kanna continued to look as if she were not quite connected to anything going on around her.

"I do not believe you three have yet been personally introduced to my lady-in-waiting, Kagome," Kikyou said, gesturing airily with her fan to the miko.

Kagome bowed once more. "It is a pleasure to make your acquaintances."

"You are the miko from the outside villages, correct?" the woman from the Minamoto clan asked. "A pleasure, dear, I am sure."

Kagura and Kanna were silent, though in the barest show of courtesy Kagura waved in her fan in acknowledgement. Sango frowned and looked as if she might call the woman on her lack of manners, but Kagome waved her fan casually in the motion of dismissal that Kikyou had shown her.

Sango settled down, lifting her fan to cover a grin. One of Kagura’s brows rose slightly, as if she had not thought Kagome capable of grasping the concept of fan etiquette.

"I believe it is time that we start out," Kikyou announced. "You may all join Kagome-sama and I in our carriage, if you wish."

With that she began walking at a stately pace towards the most ornate by far of the ox-drawn carriages, sitting ready at the head of the rest. The mass of women quieted slightly, observing her progress. They all seemed to take this as the sign that it was time to be off and began to congregate around the several other available carriages.

The Tachibana women, the Taira youkai, and the lady of the Minamoto clan all accepted Kikyou's offer to ride along. They were handed along with the future Empress and Kagome into the carriage. Kagome knelt inside the wooden structure, studying the details of it with keen interest.

It was certainly nothing like the carts of merchants that she had seen passing through her village. Rather than four wheels it had only two large ones, and a roof closed it off from the outside world. It was rather spacious inside, fitting the seven of them on the carpet covered wood of the base easily.

There were windows, as well, covered by hanging mats, and a curtain enclosed the sole entrance point in the rear of the cart. Pushing aside one of the hanging mats, Kagome could see long strands of bellflowers hanging from the eaves of the roof and colorful depictions of the sun along the wooden walls. An ox was harnessed to the front of the carriage and several attendants walked on all sides to guide and steady it.

Kikyou pushed aside the entranceway curtain, peering out to make certain that all of the women were situated in their carriages. Seeing that they were, she nodded to one of the attendants and then allowed the curtain to fall closed once more. The seven women were left in the cool shade of the inside of the carriage as the oxen were spurred forward through the gates.

"I hear from my husband, Fujiwara-sama, that we will be receiving a large shipment of lumber and other building goods from the northern border soon," the Minamoto woman began, waving her fan leisurely at shoulder level. "Though I was not aware that any buildings within the court were in need of maintenance. Are we perhaps adding a wing?"

"No," Kikyou replied readily. "Not adding. It is to be routed to a residence outside of the court, one that was destroyed in a recent youkai attack."

"Ah! Really? How terrible!" the Minamoto woman gasped emphatically, though her eyes lit up at this tidbit of gossip. "Whose was it? The poor dears!"

"It was one of my cousins," put in Kagura. "The branch of the Taira clan under Taira Akiyoshi. They keep a residence separate from the main house."

"Oh," the Minamoto woman sighed, looking as if she wished she could take back her sympathy. "A youkai clan house. Poor things."

"Indeed," Kagura said dryly, her fan twisting in a grand gesture of dismissal towards the woman.

"Hisana-sama," Kikyou spoke once more, cutting smoothly through the budding animosity. "You just returned from assignment out along the southern edges, correct? How is the situation there now?"

Kagome perked up at the mention of the area in which her village was situated. Sango's cousin tapped her chin thoughtfully with her closed fan, obviously choosing her words carefully.

"Well, things are still a bit…hectic," she said at last, her fan sliding open to shield the lower half of her face. "Our forces are still searching for a nest from which the hordes might be originating, but as of the time of my departure they were unable to find one. We are trying our best, but…well, we are slightly overwhelmed."

"Overwhelmed, you say?" Kagura said, her fan twisting eagerly in her hand. "Truly it is tragic, the current state of things. One cannot help but think that with a bit more structure behind the way in which things are ordered, these little disturbances would have remained just that-merely little disturbances."

"And to whom do you attribute this lack of structure, Kagura-sama?" Kikyou challenged lightly, her fan waving in an almost aggressive manner between herself and the youkai though her voice remained as passionless as ever.

"Attribute?" scoffed the Taira noblewoman, her fan sliding shut with a distinct air of satisfaction. "Why, my dear cousin, I was merely thinking aloud. It is hardly to be taken seriously! I am simply reflecting on the value us full youkai place in firm structure. We are almost inflexible, you see- natural born leaders, if you will."

Even Kagome could see through this thinly veiled insinuation. The Taira, then, were supporters of the elder brother.

It made sense, that a clan that was seemingly composed of mostly youkai should support a full youkai Tennō. Subtly Kagome glanced at Kikyou for her reaction, noting her white knuckled grip on her fan.

Her eyes met Sango's across the carriage, the taiji-ya seeming to be searching for a way to guide the conversation in a different direction, as well. Kagome's eyes continued to flit about the small space, hoping to come up with something before Kikyou came to the end of even her extensive patience. At last her gaze settled on the silent Kanna, absently twisting her silver mirror between two pale hands.

"That is an interesting mirror you have, Taira-sama," Kagome said, just as Kikyou's fan flipped in the beginnings of a gesture of insult. "I have never quite seen a design like that. What is it?"

All eyes in the carriage turned to Kanna's mirror. The small girl barely seemed to acknowledge the comment, but lifted the mirror in question a bit higher. Carved into its silver backing was what vaguely resembled a dragon, though a lack of legs and a prominent hood made it far more serpentine in appearance.

The style of the engraving was different from most that Kagome had seen, as well. The detail work lacked the usual Japanese fluidity. It seemed a bit choppy, more harshly beautiful.

"Merely a trinket she received recently from the Lord of the Taira clan," said Kagura dismissively, pushing the mirror down to rest in Kanna's lap. "The artist is new and relatively unknown, so of course the workmanship would appear odd."

"Ah, I see," said Kagome, though there was something suspicious in the woman's haste to put the design out of sight. "What a nice gift to receive."

"As I said, merely a trinket," Kagura reiterated disdainfully, turning her head to push aside one of the window hangings and let fresh air in.

The fans of both Sango's cousin and the Minamoto woman swung upside down in sharp gestures of insult behind the youkai's back. They looked at one another, bemused, but then seemed to both shrug mentally as they turned away. Kagome turned a questioning gaze on Sango at this, but the taiji-ya merely slid her fan closed and shook her head.

Silence reigned within the carriage after that. Kagome was glad of it, as it both prevented any further conflict and allowed her time to think. Nothing, of course, became immediately clear.

Kagome felt that she would need to take time to write it all out later if she were fully to understand everything that was going on around her. Still, it gave her a moment to solidify all the thoughts buzzing around in her head.

* * *

The carriage came to a halt, and an attendant peeked in through the back curtain to inform Kikyou that they had arrived. The future Empress nodded and allowed the man to assist her in exiting the carriage, the other six women following suit. Back out in the fresh, crisp light of day, Kagome breathed deeply and took in her surroundings.

They were in the midst of a long row of carefully arranged and tended sakura trees, their bare, frost coated branches twisting and twining their way up towards the cloudy sky. They were lined with clusters of tightly closed, tiny pink buds. Kagome could also hear the faint splashing of a nearby stream, feeling the flow of it along her spiritual senses.

Despite the chill air, the lack of sun, and the bare trees, the place still somehow had a feeling of lightness. Hope, perhaps, the miko reflected. The hope that some fine spring day the trees would burst into vibrant life in a shower of pink petals and the stream would roar with a torrent of water, overflowing its banks as the ice of its tributary was melted by the rays of the sun. The village girl could certainly see why the women had wished to come here.

Chattering voices flared up all around her as the other women began exiting their carriages. They began forming small groups once more, strolling about beneath the bare boughs of the trees and bringing welcome color to the pale scene.

Fans flapped joyously in the freedom of the cool afternoon, and the miko heard numerous exclamations on how lovely the little grove would be come spring. Personally the village girl thought it had quite its own kind of loveliness right at that moment.

"Well, I am off to go join the rest of my cousins," the lady of the Minamoto house announced, seeming eager to be out of the company of the Taira and Tachibana women.

"Must do the mandatory amount mingling, though I would love to stay and speak with you, Fujiwara-sama. Hopefully we will be able to meet again before we return, but if not, remember to remain firm as always, alright?"

"Goodbye, Minamoto-sama," Kikyou said, ignoring completely the odd bit of advice. "Do enjoy yourself."

The woman seemed slightly put off by the dismissal of her words, but nodded and bustled off with a meaningful gesture of intimacy towards the future Empress. Kikyou calmly waved her fan from left to right in dismissal when the woman was no longer looking, the vague twist to her mouth giving Kagome the idea that she would have rolled her eyes if she had less restraint.

"We must be going, as well, Fujiwara-sama," Sango spoke up, her fan fluttering apologetically in Kagome's general direction. "It has been a pleasure. We will see the both of you when you make your rounds, correct?"

"Of course," Kikyou consented. "I thank the both of you for the pleasure of your company."

The two Tachibana women bowed and turned to join the many women beginning to settle down on the several sheets of fine cloth laid out by the attendants. Tachibana Hisana tossed towards Kagome a gesture of interest and continuance as she went, leaving the miko to consider it.

Thus the future Empress, her lady-in-waiting, and the two women of the Taira clan were left standing at the head of the mass as the attendants began to bring forth numerous trays of varying foods.

Kagome turned a questioning glance on the Fujiwara noble woman, wondering why they, too, were not moving to join one of the seated groups. Kikyou's attention, however, was focused solely on Kagura.

She watched the youkai woman expectantly, obviously waiting for her to announce her own departure. The Taira woman merely stood there, observing the other women from Kikyou's side.

"Do not you, too, have to be joining your cousins, Kagura-sama?" Kikyou prompted at length, her fan closing with a resounding snap. "I would not wish to monopolize your time."

"Ah! A dismissal! And here I was hoping to remain at your side the entire day that we might talk together," Kagura proclaimed archly. "But I suppose you are correct, as always, Fujiwara-sama. We will have ample time to speak of many…sovereign matters on the ride back, hmmm? Come, Kanna, we take our leave now."

With that the two youkai women walked off to join a group of courtiers who also looked distinctly inhuman. Kagome caught a glimpse of a gesture of insult very obviously directed at Kikyou from Kagura as they reached the seated women. A sharp peal of laughter went up from the group, and Kagome frowned.

"She's quite provoking towards you, isn't she?" she could not help but comment, sorely tempted to make a rude gesture in return.

"It is not to be minded," said Kikyou, though the set of her jaw was still tense. "That is merely Kagura-sama's way. Come, we must start making rounds if we are to get through before it is time to go."

"Rounds?"

"It is my duty as future Empress to be seen by every courtier present at events such as these. Both as a courtesy and to keep them mindful of their sovereigns.”

“They must always be mindful of myself and my Lord. As my lady-in-waiting it is your duty to be seen at my side. Thus you must accompany me in this," Kikyou explained absently, her eyes scanning the mass of women.

"I see," said Kagome, thinking secretly that it sounded awfully troublesome.

Still it was another chance to observe these women. In the course of the carriage ride Kagome had only just begun to put together the pieces of the puzzle. Much more information was needed if she were to see the whole of it.

"Come along, Kagome," Kikyou called, lifting her fan to cover the lower half of her face as she finished surveying the crowd.

Kagome mimicked the future Empress' gesture and trailed after her as she glided effortlessly towards the first group of kneeling women. It was the beginning of a long afternoon for Kagome.

* * *

The reactions to the appearance of the future Empress were varied, though all veiled at least with a thin layer of polite formality. For the most part it seemed that the Minamoto women welcomed her, though in such an odd an overly concerned way that Kagome could hardly understand it. They seemed very much invested in Kikyou somehow, as had the lady of the Minamoto house who had ridden with them in the carriage.

The Taira clan, on the other hand, positively radiated disdain whenever Kikyou happened to be near. Of course they were nothing but toothy, too wide smiles outwardly, but many times when Kagome and Kikyou encountered a group of them there were several vague insults tossed out.

The Tachibana clan seemed to welcome Kikyou's presence, though a few groups of them seemed rather indifferent. At least with them there were no unpleasant encounters. Kagome was pleased to find that the majority of Sango's relatives present there seemed to be as fair minded as she was.

Reactions towards Kagome were generally wary, with the exceptions of a few of Sango's closest relatives. They all seemed to be sizing her up, and Kagome could practically see them weighing rumors and counter-rumors and every other little bit of information they had heard regarding her against her actual person.

Many, unfortunately, seemed now to be merely waiting for her to slip up that they might condemn her once more. Still no one was openly condemning, and she managed not to make any major mistakes that might invite censure.

As the afternoon wore on, Kagome also began to notice a certain pattern to the way in which the women had grouped themselves. Mostly they were grouped by clan, but in instances they did mix together.

However, the Tachibana women were utterly isolated from the others. The Taira and the Minamoto seemed to have no great love for one another, but in their opposition to the Tachibana they seemed united in some cases. It was a curious little thing that Kagome stored away in her mind for later examination.

As they came to the final group of women, Kagome felt mental exhaustion truly begin to steal over her. It was difficult to deal with the intricacies of fans and words and expressions for such an extended period. She stumbled a bit on the hem of her juni-hito in her mental lethargy, flushing and quickly righting herself.

Kikyou, however, caught her slip. With her fan she subtly made a gesture of dismissal to her. She then gestured vaguely towards the edge of the trees, beyond which Kagome could sense the flow of the stream. She nodded slightly and with deep gratitude, slipping quietly away past the tree line.

She relaxed the moment the flowing water came into view, breathing a sigh of relief at finally escaping the nearly suffocating presence of so many women of high breeding. There were so many ill feelings surrounding them, so much deceit and subtlety that it made her head spin.

Kagome came to kneel down before the stream, carefully arranging her fines clothes so as not to dirty them. It was barely a trickle of water at the moment, though the width of the banks and depth of the bed told her that in the warmer months it was practically a full blown river.

Still she could draw her peace from its unquestionable constancy. She allowed her eyes to slide shut that she might do so.

But there was something amiss. There was a crackle along the edge of her spiritual senses. It was distant, but approaching fast. Extremely fast. And it was familiar. Kagome's eyes snapped wide open in realization.

Just in time to feel the warm rush of air from the small windstorm that seemed to always precede his arrival. Kouga was before her, looking both proud and slightly sheepish.

For a long moment Kagome merely stared at him, certain that if she continued to do so for long enough he would disappear. After all, it was just too ridiculous for him to show up here and now of all places. The wolf Lord, however, did not disappear.

"You alright, Kagome? You look pale," Kouga spoke at length, disappointed that she had not immediately jumped into his arms.

Kagome shook her head, desperately trying to force her mind back into action that she might form a coherent sentence. Kouga knelt down at her side, frowning.

"You're not okay? What's the matter? What's wrong?" he asked, taking her hands into his own.

"No…I…What-What…what are you doing here, Kouga-sama?" Kagome finally managed to get out, trying in vain to tug her hands from his grip.

"I did what the stupid mutt asked," Kouga replied defensively. "I stayed away for awhile. But I got tired and bored. I wanted to come see my woman. I had to."

"You don't understand!" Kagome snapped in distress, a million disastrous endings to this spinning chaotically through her head. "There are seventy-some high ranking noblewomen just beyond those trees! If they find you here with me, it will be the end of everything! Everything, Kouga-sama!"

"Buncha chattery wenches, these court women," Kouga snapped, eyeing the tree line with disgust. "Damn if they don't have their men by the balls here. Talk to any one of 'em and suddenly the whole court knows. But don't worry, Kagome! I'll just tell them you're my woman and-"

"No!" Kagome said, trying to keep her voice down despite the spike of panic that lanced through her. "No, Kouga-sama. You have to listen to me, alright? Listen very carefully.”

“I have been working very hard to even just get this far in the court, and there's a lot more I need to do. But I can't do any of it if my name becomes connected to yours in too familiar a manner. Do you understand?"

Kouga stared blankly at her for a long moment. He cocked his head to one side thoughtfully, and a hand came up to touch the side of Kagome's face.

"You look good like this, Kagome," he said at length, as though he had not comprehended a single word she had said. "But I like you better without the powder. Wolf women don't wear any, you know-"

"Kouga-sama!" Kagome cried pleadingly.

"They-"

"Kouga-sama, please!"

"Don't worry, Kagome," said Kouga, finally acknowledging her. "You're my woman. I'll definitely protect you. And if those nosey bitches come poking around, I just won't let 'em catch me, alright?"

He stood to demonstrate, running in a vague circle around the area so quickly that Kagome's eyes could not follow him. Splatters of water dripped from the trees down onto Kagome as he passed, and she realized that the warmth of the wind he had stirred up had melted some of the frost clinging to the branches.

The flurry of upset and panic in her mind slowed abruptly, her focus entirely on the few drops of water sliding through her hair and down her face. Her gaze shifted to the trickling stream, and she recalled her initial image of the fine river that it might be.

The elements were unquestionable. This had been in her mind since her meditation with Midoriko. No one thought to inquire about the rays of the sun or the chill of the wind. And as Kouga had said, these women held a certain power in the court.

The youkai came to a halt before her, proud and expectant. Kagome gazed up at him with wide eyes, reflecting vaguely that perhaps this was what they called divine intervention. Nothing else seemed to account for the improbable perfection of it.

She rose to stand before him, and Kouga was a bit surprised at the beaming grin spreading across her face.

But all of his thoughts ceased entirely when she moved forward to place her small hands against his chest, tilting her head back so that her grey eyes caught his own, and said in the most engaging of tones,

"Kouga-sama, I need you."


	10. Of Lies and Love’s Awakening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s your mini-history lesson for this chapter:
> 
> -Kanshi- a form of Chinese poetry brought over into Japan. One of the most popular styles of poetry during the Heian period, a period that held all forms of artistic expression in the highest regard. An early form of the Haiku. Shigin was the spoken or chanted form of this poetry, and shichigon-zekku (literally seven word quatrains) were the most common form of Shigin.
> 
> -Kakei- bamboo fountains that have served as essential fixtures in the Japanese garden for centuries. If you've seen an anime with a garden involved, you've probably seen one.
> 
> Traditionally water is piped up from the ground through one piece, which pours the water into the bamboo spout, which tips when it is full and spills the water with a clacking noise back into either the pool or the ground from which it was being pumped in the first place.
> 
> As you might have noticed by now, water plays a prominent role in most Japanese gardens. It is meant to be symbolic of the flow of life through nature.
> 
> -O-miko- I think we all know by now what a miko is, but adding the prefix of o- denotes holiness or high status. In the sense it will be used, it translates roughly as High Priestess.
> 
> Now, on with the story!

* * *

Kouga stared down at the small figure against his chest, eyes wide and face rapidly reddening to rival the crimson of Kagome’s juni-hito. Under the bright gaze of the vibrant grey eyes peering up at him, he faltered. The Lord of the Eastern Wolf Tribe was, perhaps for the first time in his life, truly at a loss for words.

In the utter blankness that her words had reduced his mind to, he could only gape down at her as the moments dragged on and her ecstatic expression dimmed. At length she drew back a short distance, a frown creasing her powder-pale brow.

"Kouga-sama?"

The trance stupor he had fallen into cleared, and Kouga's thoughts whirled forward in a torrent of flurried color and emotion. Before even the wolf himself could process it, his arms were wrapped almost crushingly about Kagome.

"Kouga-sama!"

But Kouga paid no heed to her surprised cry or her wriggling struggles, a rush of elation pumping fiercely through him and blinding him to all else. He tightened his embrace about her, taking in the scent of her hair and the feel of her small, warm frame joyfully.

"I knew it! I knew you'd decide to be mine, Kagome!"

Kagome suppressed a cry that she knew would call forth unwanted attention. Pushing futilely against his firm hold, she prayed with all of her heart that none of the court women would suddenly feel inclined to take a walk near the stream.

"Kouga-sama, no! No…what?….Whatever you've got, you've got it all wrong!" she hissed in consternation, though it was clear enough that all of her protests were raining down on deaf ears.

With a huff, Kagome went limp in his hold. Struggling only seemed to tighten the vice around her anyway, and she was certain he would unwittingly snap one of her ribs soon.

She forced herself to calm down enough consider what blunder had ended her in this position yet again with the wolf Lord. Somehow the two of them never quite seemed to be able to connect correctly.

Skimming quickly through her memories of the last few moments, she gasped as she compared the words she had meant to say with the ones that had actually sprung from her mouth in her excitement. With all of her might she abruptly shoved back against the wolf Lord, and thankfully he was surprised enough to release her.

Holding his armor-covered shoulders firmly at arm's length, Kagome gazed sternly into Kouga's ecstatic eyes. She felt a quick flinch of guilt, realizing that she truly had misled him this time. Silently she scolded herself for not being more self-conscious even after all that she had learned, vowing to work harder at controlling her impulsive reactions.

"I meant, 'I need you _to help me_ ', Kouga-sama," Kagome amended, leaving no room for miscommunication. "I need your _help_."

Kouga's face-splitting grin slipped a notch and he seemed to process this for a long moment, his eyes shifting to and fro as if to trace the path of his own thoughts. He scowled then, raising his gaze back up to meet her own accusingly.

Kagome released her grip on his shoulders and moved back a step, slightly disconcerted to find anything like ire from the wolf Lord directed at herself.

"That's not what you said," Kouga objected, something almost petulant in the twist of his mouth.

"It is what I meant, though," Kagome returned, her tone slightly more apologetic.

He glared at her for a silent stretch before turning his back to her with a snort. Kagome frowned and chewed her lower lip, worried that she had really upset him this time. Truly her several informal encounters with Kouga had made her less cautious than she should have been around him.

"Well, what if I don't want to help you, huh?" he huffed.

She blanched slightly. She really had upset him this time.

"I truly am sorry, Kouga-sama," Kagome said pleadingly, bowing despite the fact that he could not see her. "It was not my intention to mislead you. But I really do need your help-"

"I'm not really in the mood," he cut her off childishly.

"Kouga-sama, _please_ , I-"

"I guess I could be persuaded, though," he interrupted again, glancing at her from over his shoulder. "If you promised me compensation."

"Compensation?" Kagome echoed, frowning slightly. "I do not really have anything of much value, Kouga-sama…"

"It's not some piece of crap court trinket I want," Kouga snorted.

"Then…what, Kouga-sama?" Kagome said, wary even as the words left her lips. 

Kouga’s look grew decidedly wolfish, his eyes roving from the hem of her juni-hito to the crown of her head. Kagome flushed under the suggestive gaze, fighting the urge to cover herself despite the fifteen layers already draped over her frame. Surely he could not be thinking…

"A kiss," Kouga declared. "That will be my reward."

"Kouga-sama!" Kagome exclaimed, barely remembering to keep her voice down. "That's hardly a proper thing to-!"

"Then I'm not doing it," he said, turning away from her once more.

She gaped, her face reddening further in her upset. On the one hand, whatever Kouga's standards might be, a kiss was hardly any small thing in her estimation. It was not something to just be given away so casually, and it might further mislead the wolf Lord as to her feelings for him.

On the other hand, a chance as perfect as this one might never come along again and he was absolutely essential to her plan. A glance back at the edge of the trees and a passing thought of Inuyasha decided it for her.

"Fine," she huffed out, truly feeling the weight of the word in her chest. "If you do this for me, I will…give you a-a…kiss…."

"Then we have a deal," Kouga said, whipping around to grab her hands. "Just tell me what you want me to do. I'll finish up in a flash and be back for my reward."

Kagome cringed, wondering what exactly she had just done. She sighed, shaking her head and deciding not to think about it for the moment lest she lose her nerve. She slipped her hands from his to gesture at the stream.

"I need you to find the source of this stream. How quickly do you think can do that?"

He tilted his head back slightly, nostrils flaring as he scented the air. He sifted through the various smells contemplatively until he found the right one.

"Smells like it's not far," he concluded aloud. "I could be there and back in a matter of minutes."

"Alright, then," Kagome said, nodding more to herself than to him as she considered this. "I need you to go to the source and remove whatever is blocking its flow. I am assuming that the water is frozen, so you will need to melt it.”

“Run around it until you have heated the surrounding air enough to melt the ice all at once. I need it to come down in one big rush, alright? Do not forget that.”

“After that I need you to follow its progress as the water flows back towards here. When you think it is about seventeen minutes or so from here, run ahead of it and come tell me. Do you think you can do all of that, Kouga-sama?"

"Anything you want, Kagome," he responded readily, eager to be off that he might sooner return and claim his prize.

"Good," Kagome said, though the look on his face did not do much to ease her nerves. "You should get going now. And make certain none of the women see or sense you, alright? It will all be pointless if any of them catch you."

Kouga nodded and then was gone in a blast of wind that had her stumbling backwards. She sighed, kneeling carefully down on the ground and patting her head to make certain that the intricate pinning of her hair had not been ruined. Feeling that it was still intact for the most part, she settled in to wait with as much patience as she could muster.

With all of her heart she prayed to the kami that this plan of hers would work. No one should question the elements or seasons, after all. And so long as no one caught on to Kouga's presence, everything would be alright.

Absently Kagome realized that the wolf Lord, in his eagerness, had not even bothered to question why she was asking him to do all of this.

She sighed, shaking her head bemusedly. She could never quite comprehend what it was that went through Kouga’s head. Then again, perhaps it was just that he was so utterly simple that he seemed complicated.

And to demand a kiss of all things! Some kind of noble he was, to ask something like that of her. But then again, that kind of decorum most likely did not matter much in the intimate, rural setting in which Kouga and his clan lived.

Kagome sighed, shaking her head. There was no help for it. Though she did not relish the idea, a kiss was no great thing in comparison to what she was aiming to do here.

If she could pull this off-no, when she pulled it off, Inuyasha would finally be forced to trust her fully. On top of that, the court would be in just the position necessary for her to begin working as she truly wished to. She could finally begin to put things into motion.

Kagome nodded to herself, affirming in her mind that her mission was a worthy one and that she was in the right in doing everything necessary to further it. She closed her eyes, spreading her spiritual sense out and slowly up the bed of the trickling stream.

Her senses would not stretch far enough to touch either the source of the stream or Kouga, but still she waited patiently. She kept a portion of her senses concentrated on the tree line, as well, just to make certain there were no surprises on that end.

From what she could feel, almost all of the women seemed to still be sitting on the sheets spread out that they might enjoy their meals. That was good thing. It would be much easier to get their attention if they were all still arranged in so orderly a manner.

Abruptly her focus shifted back to the stream as she felt a rush of water burst over her spiritual senses, roaring and sloshing and overflowing its banks in jubilation. In quick succession followed the familiar prickle of Kouga's youki, slowing his usual speed slightly to keep pace with the rushing water.

Kagome bit her tongue to hold back a cry of joy, continuing to follow the course of the wolf and the water with her second sight. It was much more water than she had even dared to hope for, and Kouga seemed to have done a perfect job of melting it quickly enough to cause a huge surge. It would have exactly the dramatic effect that she was hoping for.

Now came the real trial. What sort of announcement would have the most impact of the noblewomen?

Kagome sifted quickly through every lesson Kaede had ever given her on the kami and courtiers. A common link between the two…

Poetry! Such rhythmic and elegant endeavors were of course dear to the kami, as they put the soul of the individual more in line with the flow of the universe. Courtiers, too, valued it as a way by which to showcase refinement. It was the perfect!

On the downside, Kagome's lessons in poetry were anything but extensive. Really Kaede had only given her the proper format of a few styles of basic verse and a handful of odd examples. She certainly did not want to come out sounding more boorish than some already thought her by mangling the spiritual art of disciplined verse.

Still, it was too perfect a medium to pass over. If she stuck to a simple shichigon-zekku form of Shigin chant poetry, she should be able to keep her blunders to a minimum. Nodding, Kagome began working out the words and rhythm in her mind.

A few minutes later Kouga came skidding into the clearing, calling her back into the present moment. He beamed at her, obviously quite pleased with his efforts.

"I did it just like you said, Kagome," he said. "I'd say you've got about nineteen minutes or so before the water reaches here."

Kagome nodded and got to her feet, not quite finished polishing what she wanted to say but well aware that it was to be now or never. With a deep breath and a cursory glance down at her juni-hito to make certain it was not overly rumpled or stained, she started back towards the tree line.

"Oi, Kagome!"

She glanced back, startled. Kouga eyed her expectantly, a too-wide grin splitting his face.

"My compensation, remember?"

Kagome flushed hotly, recalling her promise. For a brief moment she considered asking to postpone payment, but quickly dismissed the idea. There was no use in just delaying the inevitable, and she could not afford to waste the time that Kouga would undoubtedly spend arguing with her over it.

Thus Kagome, in a highly unladylike gesture, picked up the hem of her juni-hito and marched purposefully over to the youkai, stopping when she was about arm’s length away. Kouga's eyes widened slightly, as if he had expected her to put up more resistance.

Still a promise was a promise, and Kagome was a woman of her word. Trying hard not to think about it, she went up on her toes until she was as near to face to face with the wolf as she could get. His eyes met her own and she flushed scarlet, her gaze sliding down a bit to his lips.

She forced herself to lean forward and willed her fluttering heart to be calm, absently licking at her own lips. Glancing once more up into those keen ice-blue eyes, Kagome was struck by a sudden notion.

Swiftly she leaned in and kissed the youkai Lord.

Right on the cheek. Though she made sure it was near enough to the corner of his mouth that he was momentarily stunned.

With that, Kagome turned tail and hurried away as fast as her geta and juni-hito would allow. She grinned slightly to herself, realizing that it was a rather cheap trick.

"Oi!"

"It counts!" Kagome called back, not bothering to turn or slow her pace.

She knew that he would not bother to follow her. Whatever else he might be, Kouga was a warrior and lived by the way of a warrior. Payment had been given, albeit not in quite the anticipated form, and so he had no reason to further pursue her for the moment.

Her grin widened as she reached the tree line and felt the aura of the youkai Lord fade behind her. Just as she had anticipated.

Still all of her good feelings curdled as she peered out through the trees at the groups of women kneeling primly on fine silks across the clearing from her. Nerves fluttered like the wings of a humming bird through her stomach, and a hint of embarrassment even dared to rear its reticent head.

It was such a juvenile feeling for such a serious moment, and Kagome scolded herself roundly. Still the thought of so many critical eyes on her as she did something so outrageous was nothing if not embarrassing.

Taking a deep breath in through her nose, she concentrated on the feel of air sliding into and then back out of her lungs. Slowly she slipped back into her memories of the character that she had played so many times before in the Dengaku, telling herself that this was just another one of the many dances done in celebration of the harvest.

It was time to give them a show they would not soon forget.

Forcefully Kagome thrust herself out from the cover of the trees, staggering and clutching her head with purpose. She dared not raise her eyes to look, but she could feel several gazes turn to her.

With all of the grace that years of moving through the steps of the Dengaku had given her, Kagome made as if she were going to tumble to the ground. At the last moment she twisted, turning quickly so that the layers of her juni-hito twirled about her feet.

She tottered forward a few more steps before standing still for a long moment, swaying to and fro while silently congratulating herself on having pulled off such a move in such a cumbersome outfit.

From the corner of her eye she could see several of the figures across from her rise, and she clutched once more at her head as she tripped forward a few steps. She let out a small wail, just loud enough that she was certain the women would hear her, before rolling her eyes forcefully back into her head.

Abruptly she surrendered all control of her muscles, crumpling to the ground like a puppet whose strings had been cut.

Lying perfectly still, Kagome could hear the shocked and horrified cries of several women echo through the clearing. She kept her eyes closed and her expression carefully lax, listening as many of the women rose and some ventured nearer to her prone form.

"What is happening?"

"Is she ill?"

"Has she gone mad?"

"Kagome! Kagome!"

From amidst the numerous chattering voices one emerged, loud and scared. Kagome pushed down a twinge of guilt, reminding herself that this was exactly what she had been hoping for.

She listened carefully to the dull clomping of a pair of geta as the figure to whom the voice belong hurried over as quickly as her juni-hito would allow, dropping roughly to her knees at her side.

"Kagome! Kagome, can you hear me? Kagome!"

She could feel the nervous fluttering of her dear friend's hands, roving carefully up and down her form in search of injury. Still she did not move, waiting for just the right moment. She vowed that she would apologize thoroughly to Sango just as soon as she got the chance.

Anxiously Kagome continued to lay and listen, allowing none of her inner turmoil to manifest in either her limp frame or her placid expression. The nervous fluttering of fans and the muffled thud of geta grew louder as more and more of the women came to crowd about her. She felt keenly the weight of each of their stares upon her.

There was a gentle rustling as a second figure came unexpectedly to kneel at her side.

"What is wrong with her, Sango-sama?"

It was Kikyou's voice.

"I am not certain, Fujiwara-sama. She just _collapsed_ … I am afraid to move her. I might make it worse if I cannot figure out what is ailing her first."

Now was the time, Kagome knew. The women were gathered as closely as they were going to get and there would not be a better one.

Letting out a low, keening sort of wail, she began to clench and unclench every muscle in her control rapidly in the mimic of a shaking fit. She forced her body to shake and spasm and writhe about, pleased with the gasps and exclamations that rippled through the surrounding crowd. A few of the women even screamed.

"Kagome!"

"Move."

Vaguely Kagome felt as Sango was pressed to the side. Then a pair of slender arms wound themselves about her convulsing shoulders, hauling her up against a slight chest.

It was Kikyou, Kagome realized. She was so shocked she almost fell out of her character, but managed just barely to turn her surprised flinch into yet another contortion of her body.

"You need to lay her on her side and loosen the neck of her juni-hito!" instructed Sango, seeming to regain some of her wits.

Kagome went limp then, knowing that she wanted no such thing to happen. The whole crowd went silent as the miko sagged back lifelessly into the future Empress' hold. A long moment stretched past and then the chattering resumed twofold, the air all around dancing with the swishes and flicks of numerous fans.

"Can you tell if she is alright, Sango-sama?" came Kikyou's voice softly from above her.

"I do not know-"

Sango cut herself off as Kagome slid her eyes open suddenly. She stared blankly up into the gray sky, her eyes as wide as she could make them. In her periphery vision she could vaguely see the faces of the women all around her, their excited babbling and exclamations filling her ears.

"Kagome?" Kikyou said, shaking her shoulders slightly. "Kagome? Can you hear me?"

Kagome shifted her wide, all-encompassing gaze to meet the anxious brown eyes of the future Empress. Summoning up a bit of her spiritual energy, Kagome drew it like a film across her eyes. Through the blue glow she saw Kikyou's eyes widen a fraction.

There were several gasps and squeaks of surprise from the other women nearest to them. Sango crept forward to peer over the shoulder of the future Empress at Kagome in what almost looked like awe.

"Kagome?"

But Kagome did not focus her gaze on any of them, remaining carefully disconnected. Rather she called forth another tendril of her power, drawing it up like air into her throat. Her every breath crackled with the force of it.

Now for the finishing touch. Opening her mouth, the miko intoned the words she had so hurriedly conjured up with all of the gravity of delivering the second message of Kiyomichi-sama,

" _In the cage of Winter's grasp sleeps_

_The water of man's higher life, although_

_In this season of ice they shall,_

_In divine hands, joyfully drown all banks."_

Each word crackled with the raw power that came of summoning up her abilities without a medium, licking and lashing statically at the air all around Kagome. Women gasped and shrieked and stumbled backwards at the otherworldly spectacle. Judging by a few dull thuds, Kagome thought that some might even have fainted.

Kikyou, amazingly enough, held on to her through the whole ordeal, her eyes intensely focused on Kagome's glowing orbs. Truly the woman seemed unshakeable, intently taking in each word that sizzled through the air around her with something like awe blooming in her stoic face.

Kagome gave the future Empress one last long, wide-eyed look as she finished speaking, shifting her gaze slowly and with purpose between Kikyou's eyes and the tree line and then back again. Silently willing to noblewoman to understand, Kagome allowed herself to go limp once more.

A heavy hush had fallen over the group of women once more. Gently Kikyou laid Kagome back down on the cool ground. Kagome resisted the urge to squirm or open her eyes to take a peek, forcing herself to hold still and praying that Kikyou would get the women moving quickly. There was not much time left.

"Wh-what in all of Japan was that?"

A shaking voice broke the silence at last. It sounded like the Minamoto woman that Kagome had met earlier, though it was hard to be certain.

"Has your girl gone mad, Fujiwara-sama?"

"Maybe she is possessed!"

"Possessed! You mean an evil spirit! No-!"

From there the talk degenerated into a cacophony of nervously excited squawkings, so many women speaking so rapidly that one word was hardly discernible from the next. The sheer force of will it took Kagome to keep from groaning was almost painful.

Her mind darted about like a nervous bird beneath the closed lids of her eyes, trying frantically to think up some way to salvage the quickly deteriorating situation.

"Silence!"

Kikyou's voice rang, loud and clear like the peal of a bell, over the others. Slowly the chaos died down, and Kagome could almost feel it as all of the anxious and expectant eyes turned to the future Empress.

"Now, cousins, you must calm down and consider this rationally. You are true ladies, after all, and true ladies do not succumb to such unseemly behavior."

She paused, allowing time for the women to take this in and compose themselves appropriately. Kagome could sense it as they all forced themselves into a semblance of equanimity for at least the sake of appearances, their fans resuming the leisurely wave characteristic of 'true ladies'.

"Now, Sango-sama. You are taiji-ya and familiar with such things as possession, are you not?" Kikyou said.

"Yes, that is true, Fujiwara-sama," came Sango's voice, and Kagome was surprised to hear that she was still on the ground near to the miko's prone form.

"And would you say that what just occurred looked like a possession by an evil spirit, Sango-sama?"

"No," Sango answered softly, her hand coming up to rest on Kagome's shoulder. "That was definitely not an evil spirit, Fujiwara-sama."

"And Kagura-sama," Kikyou pressed on. "The aura coming from Kagome just now, it clashed with your youki?"

"…It did," Kagura admitted begrudgingly.

"Then it was obviously a spiritual aura," reasoned Kikyou, and Kagome would have hugged the woman could she have moved. "My cousins, I believe we have just been allowed by the kami a glimpse at the divine. Come now, follow me."

Kikyou's footsteps turned towards the tree line, a swish of air indicating that she had motioned with her fan for the noblewomen to join her.

There was a moment of hesitation among the noblewomen that seemed to stretch on forever for Kagome. At the edge of her spiritual sense she could feel the waters rushing torrentially along down the riverbed, and she knew that if they did not go now the impact that she had been hoping for would be lost entirely.

Still Kagome could do nothing more lest she betray her own ruse, and so she concentrated all of her will into not tensing up. It was in the hands of the kami now to pass judgment on her charade.

At last she felt movement as Sango gave her shoulder a meaningful squeeze before rising up from her side. She started out quickly after the future Empress.

"Cousin, wait for me!" called a voice, followed by hurried, clomping little foot falls.

It was Hisana from earlier, Kagome realized. With her cry the dam seemed finally to break. The ground on which Kagome's head rested resounded with the steps of noblewomen making their way towards the stream.

Kagome remained motionless even as the sound faded behind the tree line. Briefly the urge to rise and go watch the reactions of the women rang through her limbs, but she dismissed it quickly. It would seem odd if she were to get up now. Better that she play at being unconscious until they took her back to the court, however frustrating it might be.

To satisfy at least a bit of her curiosity, she stretched out her senses beyond the line of the trees to where she could feel all of the women gathering. It was not quite as good as actually seeing and hearing their responses, but it would have to do.

Kikyou and Sango stood at the head of the group, Kagura, Kanna, and Hisana just slightly behind them. From what Kagome could sense most of the women seemed confused, their gazes straying this way and that and the next for whatever it was that had brought them there. Kikyou, on the other hand, was focused with no small amount of intensity on the tiny trickle of the stream.

The future Empress had understood, then. And if the intensity of her concentration was any indication, Kikyou obviously thought her vision to be an authentic one. That was certainly a step in the right direction.

Stretching her senses little further, Kagome sought out the flood of water once more. She was pleased to find that it was only moments away from the women. They could probably hear the roar of it by now.

Kagome followed its aura as it came roiling and spilling fiercely down into the river bed just before the women, branches and stones and rocks and mud caught up in its flow. So intense was her focus in her excitement that she felt even the waves that jumped the bank and washed over the hems of the robes of several women.

Shifting her concentration back onto the auras of the women, Kagome waited tensely for a reaction. Her second sight was a pure white blank.

And then there was an explosion of color so bright that Kagome wanted to cover her already closed eyes. Surprise, disbelief, even a bit of fear were the feelings that seemed to dominate the group as they began to put together everything that had gone on.

All positive reactions in her mind. Only something they were taking seriously could be made to evoke such a strong reaction.

There was a thread of something else, though. It was such fierce, writhing emotion that its color shifted by the moment in Kagome's second sight, but when pressed she had to call it some kind of desperate relief. It was Kikyou.

Kagome was not quite certain what to make of this. Fighting down a frown, Kagome withdrew her senses from the women. She had done all she could and it seemed that she had gotten the response she was hoping for. Now she had simply to wait and see how the rest would unravel.

Mentally exhausted from all of her frantic efforts, Kagome allowed her mind to drain slowly of all thought. Half-dozing she rested there, a vague sense of contentment stealing warmly over her despite the chill air.

She had done her best. Whatever happened now, she had done her best. She could hardly wait to tell Inuyasha.

As far as she knew, it could have been hours or minutes before the light thudding of footsteps penetrated her haze. She roused herself slightly to listen, refraining still from giving away her consciousness.

The women came to stand in a rough circle about her, and she could feel the force of almost every eye upon her form. Yet they all remained several lengths away from her, none of them daring to come any nearer. Weighty silence reigned for a time.

"I believe, cousins, you all understand well enough what has occurred here."

There was something strange about the future Empress' voice, Kagome thought. It was subtle, very subtle, but it was there. Somehow it almost seemed…firmer. More certain. Silently she wondered at this.

"There is no way," retorted another voice quickly, sharply. "There is no way…not in some common born upstart. Some ice melted. That is all. Nothing more than that."

That was Kagura. She sounded uncharacteristically disturbed. Still a few women murmured their agreement, fans flicking agitatedly at the air. Most of them were Kagura's relatives, Kagome guessed.

"You know as well as I do that the kami are responsible for all things in nature, Kagura-sama, even 'some ice melting'," Kikyou said. "Besides, how would you account for such a torrent of water? Nearly all of the tributary ice would have had to have melted almost in an instant, and in this season and weather, too.”

“And even were we to presume that this was merely some playful whim of the kami, why would Kagome be privileged to their whims before they went through? How else would you explain her fit, or her fore-knowledge, Kagura-sama?"

"I…"

Kagura could only trail off into frustrated silence. There really was no argument against the nearly flawless logic of the future Empress. Inwardly Kagome applauded Kikyou, truly appreciating her inflexible disposition for perhaps the first time.

Still Kikyou was silent for a protracted moment, obviously waiting for any other objections the women might think to voice. They made not a sound, though, stunned as most of them were by the gravity of what had just occurred before them. Kagome could feel Kikyou's sense of victory wrapped firmly about the future Empress' form like a set of new armor.

"Cousins, you would all do well to mark this day," Kikyou said. "For on this day you have been allowed to witness the divine. On this day you have seen the birth of a Seeress.”

“On this day you have seen the renewal of the ancient promise of the kami to in all ways support a righteous Tennō-sama, in the form of their blessing of his Majesty's servant. On this day, cousins, you have witnessed a _vision_."

* * *

Soon after this declaration, Kikyou made it known that it was past time that the group return to the Heian-Kyō. No one argued this, all of them having gone silent and thoughtful in the wake of Kagome's performance.

The future Empress had the servants clear the grounds and load Kagome carefully into her carriage. No guests joined the two in their carriage on the way back, and the ride passed in silence. The entire time Kagome could feel Kikyou's eyes on her face, and Kagome could not help but wonder what was going through the noblewoman's mind.

* * *

It was not until some time later when she awoke in an unfamiliar room that Kagome realized she had actually fallen asleep at some point. Groggily she wormed her way out from beneath the blankets of the expansive futon in which she had been placed, sitting up to yawn and stretch.

Scanning the large room, only slightly smaller in size than that of the future Empress, Kagome wondered absently where they had placed her. There were a couple of folding screens placed here and there, and the walls were adorned with three of the most intricate ink paintings that she had ever seen.

There were shoji screens both behind and in front of Kagome and, peering around the edge of one of the folding screens, she found a low wooden table and a set of cushions. A trunk of dark cedar wood and a small mirror rested in the far corner of the room.

Overall it was very well set up. Too well furnished for them to have simply placed her in a random room, anyway. It seemed that this room had been prepared specifically for someone's use.

Her clothes had been changed, too, Kagome realized. It was lovely, light sleeping yukata of the softest cotton, patterned appropriately enough with flowing streams. Certainly Kagome had grown accustomed to the sight of such finery here in the court, but all of this together seemed far too grand for the likes of herself.

Curious, Kagome crawled over to the shoji screen directly behind her and slid it open just the slightest crack. Peering out, she was surprised to find a long, low wooden sitting porch and a garden just outside of her room. Both seemed to be empty of any other people as far as she could see, and the short surrounding wall kept anyone else from entering.

Cautiously she slid the shoji open a bit further, glancing about once more to make certain that no one was coming. Finding that the place was truly empty, Kagome stepped out into the pale morning light. She shivered, pulling her yukata tighter about herself against the bite of the crisp winter air.

The garden was not an exceptionally large one when compared with others that Kagome had seen, but it had a peaceful, cozy sort of feel about it. At its center rested a large koi pond, filled with drifting water lilies and lined all around with various stones. Sparse but well-managed vegetation dotted the ground here and there.

Directly opposite her, resting almost against the enclosing wall, was a small wooden shrine of some sort. On either side of it sat a small stone statue, one of the Buddha and the other of Amaterasu. Both figures were in poses of deep meditation.

The quiet, intermittent clacking of the kakei as it was filled and then emptied its water into the koi pond echoed through the small space. It was nice, thought Kagome, closing her eyes to listen for a moment.

Reluctantly she disengaged herself from the tranquil atmosphere, deciding that it was time to figure out what was going on. She slid the shoji screen closed behind her, going to the opposite screen and sliding it open a crack. Peeking out into the long hallway just outside, she jumped back with a squeak of surprise.

There were guards posted on either side of the shoji just outside of her room. But why in all of Japan would there be guards for her? Kagome raised a hand to touch her brow, scouring her mind for even the vaguest of memories of what had led up to this situation.

"Is something the matter, Miko-sama? Was there something that you needed us to get for you?" came a voice through the screen.

It was male, obviously one of the guards. He had probably been alerted by her little cry, she realized. She crept forward to peer at him through the opening in the shoji.

"Yes…um, I am sorry to bother you, but could you possibly tell me where I am and what I am doing here? You see, I just woke up and I am a little bit lost…" Kagome trailed off sheepishly.

"Yes, of course, Miko-sama. My apologies," said the guard, and she saw him bow low before the screen. "You are in one of the disconnected quarters of the Chūwain. The Tennō-sama thought it best that you go into ascetic isolation for a time that you might reflect on the vision that the kami gave you.”

“We are here to serve you should you require anything, but otherwise there will be no one allowed to see you. Ah. Actually, the future Empress gave me this to give to you when you finally awoke. I believe it is from his Majesty."

A piece of folded paper was slipped beneath the door. Kagome picked it up, opening it and reading:

_Looks like you really did it, you insane wench. You’ll need to stay here until everything gets sorted out. I will call for you in a week, so suck it up and stay put until then. If you need something, let the guards know. I made sure to pick a pair of loyal ones this time._

_Inuyasha_

Kagome scowled at the note, huffing softly. That was hardly any sort of thanks for all of her effort. He did not even sound slightly pleased with her. Still he did not seem too angry at her either, and with a sigh she decided that that was probably all she could expect from him for the moment.

Even more disappointing than his reaction, though, was the fact that Kagome had not gotten to announce to him in person what she had done. She had really been looking forward to it, too. Finally she could force him to put some real faith in her.

The idea of a week in isolation was hardly very appealing, either. What would she do with an entire week all alone? It reminded her uncomfortably of the week she had spent in near segregation after the spread of the rumor regarding herself and Kouga. Having been raised in the tight community of her village, she was hardly accustomed to much privacy and was distinctly uncomfortable with the idea of being left on her own for such a stretch of time.

That, and Kagome had been anticipating being able to visit with Miroku and Sango once more. She was not certain if she should explain what she had done to them or not, but she at least wanted to get their reactions on what had gone on. Besides which she missed being able to speak with them, and she had yet to thank them properly for all that they had done for her during the rumor incident.

It would also have been nice to go out among the courtiers to gauge how they were dealing with her little spectacle. That way she might be able to act if it seemed the tide of general opinion was flowing somewhere undesirable. But now she was simply cut off from it all, though a small part of her grudgingly admitted that she could understand the reasoning behind it.

All in all, Kagome's leftover good feelings from her victory were quickly souring. Absently she sighed again, wondering what exactly she was supposed to do now. It was disconcerting to have no immediate purpose with which to occupy herself.

"Ah, Miko-sama? I apologize if I am disturbing you or prying, but is something the matter?" the guard spoke up from outside of the screen, concerned at the second burdened sigh in the span of several moments.

"Oh, no. It is nothing, really," Kagome said, forcing her voice into a semblance of cheerfulness. "I was just thinking about…various things. I apologize."

"Not at all, Miko-sama," the guard returned kindly. "I…I am more than willing to be of service to you in any manner that I can. Perhaps you would like for me to fetch some food for you? It must have been awhile since last you ate anything."

"That would be wonderful," Kagome said, recalling suddenly how long it had been since her last meal. "Thank you so much…"

"I am from the Hojo clan, Miko-sama," the guard filled in when she trailed off expectantly. "Hojo Akitoki, at your service. I will go fetch your meal straightaway."

She could hear his eager steps padding off down the hall before she could so much as open her mouth to thank him. Kagome blinked several times, bemused at the man's behavior. She tilted her head, trying to recall any previous mention of the Hojo clan made to her. She could not, meaning it was most likely a minor clan.

She was slightly startled by chuckling just outside the screen, remembering after a moment that there was a second guard posted at the door. Peeking once more through the opening in the shoji screen, she gazed at the mirthful dark haired man.

"Is…something the matter?" she asked.

"Oh, no, not at all, Miko-sama," the man guffawed, trying to compose himself. "I beg your pardon. It's just…he's so eager."

"I suppose so," Kagome replied warily as the man degenerated back into choked chortles.

"Truly I am sorry, Miko-sama. I have known him for some time, and the kid hardly ever ceases to amuse," the man explained. "He requested this job, you know? Went as far as to beg the Tennō-sama to be allowed to guard you."

"I…see," said Kagome, not quite sure what to make of this. "Ah, I do not suppose you would know where I could get a set of clothes to change into?"

"There should be a few sets of robes and some other things in the trunk in there, Miko-sama," the guard said. "Please feel free to tell me if you require anything else."

"Yes, of course. Thank you."

Sliding the screen fully closed once more, Kagome rose and went back to the trunk. She pulled from it a set of miko robes, pausing at the sight of a stack of papers and writing utensils just beneath them. Struck by an idea, she undressed and redressed quickly.

Tying her hair back into a long tail at the nape of her neck, Kagome pulled out the papers, ink stone, and brushes to bring them over to the dining table. She knelt before them for a moment, looking about thoughtfully. On a whim she rose and slid open the shoji that led out into the garden, nodding in satisfaction as the cadenced beat of the kakei filled the room. Returning to the table, she settled in to do a bit of writing.

First off she penned a letter to Miroku and Sango, assuring them that she was perfectly well and apologizing for having scared the noblewoman. She requested that they keep her updated on the goings on in the court while she was in isolation and promised to explain everything more thoroughly when she was allowed to see them in person once more. She was not quite ready to either lie or reveal everything to her friends yet.

Setting that letter aside, she entertained the idea of writing to Inuyasha. At length she dismissed the idea as an unproductive one. She doubted she would get a response any more in depth than what she had already gotten from his letter.

Besides that, she was not quite certain what she even wanted to say to him. It seemed he already knew anything she might have to tell. The urge to have some sort of contact with him lingered, but she decided it was best to just ignore the feeling for the time being.

There was a light tapping at the shoji where the guards were stationed, and Kagome rose to open it. The young guard from before bowed in the doorway, a tray of food placed before him. The other guard, still standing, looked on with amusement tilting up the corners of his mouth.

"Thank you so much, Hojo-sama," Kagome said. “I am glad you were so quick. I am famished."

"Not at all, Miko-sama. I am glad I could be of service to you. I hope all of the food is to your liking," he said, pushing the tray slightly towards her.

Kagome smiled and reached out to bring the tray the rest of the way into the room, accidentally brushing the guard's hand as she did so. Immediately his face flamed brighter than the red of her hakama. Kagome frowned, puzzled, and the other guard smothered a laugh.

With a slight bow, she took up the tray and slid the shoji screen shut. Outside she could hear Hojo stuttering some nonsense while the other guard erupted into full-blown snorts of glee. She bit her lower lip thoughtfully, wondering if there had been some subtle joke she had missed.

Shrugging mentally, she decided that their odd behavior was not really her concern. She had Inuyasha’s assurance that they were both loyal, after all.

She returned to the table and set the tray down, digging into the food with vigor in the absence of anyone to critique her manners. Despite all of the negative aspects of this sudden isolation, it was a bit nice to be freed for a time from the scrutiny of the courtiers.

As she ate she considered what she should do next, mentally sorting through all of the things she wanted to get done and picking out the ones she knew she could accomplish while in the confines of the room.

As she finished she decided that it would be best to do a mental review of her lunch with the noblewomen. That way she might begin to sort through all that she had seen there.

Setting the tray aside, she drew another sheet of paper towards herself. Kaede had always preached to her the value of writing things out as a means of organizing tangled thoughts. That seemed the most effective manner of dealing with the complex relations that the court women had displayed.

For a long moment she simply stared at it, trying to organize her thoughts enough to find a starting point. At last she picked up her brush, dipped it in the well of the ink stone, and began to list the name of each clan she had encountered.

First off was Sango's clan, the Tachibana. Their loyalties seemed straightforward enough. None of them had been hostile towards herself or the future Empress, and from what she had heard it seemed that many of them were out employed in the service of the Tennō. That was well enough. She had at least one set of allies, then.

Next were the Minamoto. They were a bit harder to pin down. The Minamoto woman she had ridden with in Kikyou's carriage had seemed quite supportive of the future Empress, but the clan as a whole seemed to want little to do with the Tachibana.

If the Minamoto were in favor of the Tennō, they should logically have no problems with a clan sharing the same loyalties. Perhaps a clan rivalry for higher status, then? That, however, did not entirely explain their willingness to associate with the Taira clan, though they obviously seemed to have no great love for the members of it. What was the commonality that connected the two?

She did not yet have enough information to pass judgment on their position. Resolving to keep an eye on them for the time being, Kagome simply left room on the parchment for anything she might learn in the future.

Which brought her to the Taira clan. Kagome scowled, Kagura's smirking face surfacing in her mind's eye. At least the youkai woman had made it abundantly clear where their loyalties had been placed. They were in favor of the elder brother.

Dipping her brush to write this out, she paused. Suddenly she was struck with a thought the likes of a stone wall being dropped unceremoniously in her path. The two guards that had attempted to kill Inuyasha! They had claimed connection with the Taira clan!

A combination of reluctance to even think about the events that had taken place on that fateful trip and the fact that the guards had been human had kept her from ever making the connection. But from what she had seen, all of the Taira clan seemed to be composed of youkai. How, then, had two humans come to be associated with the clan?

Perhaps the claim of the guards had been false. Scrambling up from her place, she hurried over to the shoji screen. Pushing it open slightly, she peered out at the guards.

"Um, excuse me," Kagome began.

"Is there something you require, Miko-sama?" Hojo asked politely.

"Ah, Kagome is fine, if you do not mind. Miko-sama feels…a bit too formal," Kagome said, noticing uncomfortably the high honor of such an address. "I just had a question, and I was wondering if either of the two of you could help me."

"Of course. We are here to serve you, Miko-…K-Kagome-sama," Hojo faltered, the tips of his ears going pink at being allowed to use her given name.

"Well, then, do either of you know what the symbol is that the Taira clan uses?"

"That would be Susano-o-no-Mikoto, divinity of the rainstorm," the young guard answered promptly.

"Ah, I see," Kagome said thoughtfully, considering this. "Thank you, Hojo-sama. That was just what I needed."

"Not at all," returned Hojo, looking pleased. "I am glad to be of service to you, Kagome-sama."

With a slight smile she bowed before sliding the screen closed once more. Slowly she resumed her place at the table, chewing her lip as she contemplated this.

It was safe, then, to assume that they had not been lying about their ties with the Taira. That, however, only made things that much more puzzling.

The Taira clan was a clan of youkai and was blatantly pro-youkai in its sentiments. They seemed to want not the slightest trace of human blood anywhere near the throne.

But then why would they employ two human guards for such an important mission? Why would the guards even consent to such a mission, knowing as they must that at the end of the road it would gain them no status?

Maybe they had been promised some special reward. Or perhaps they had been deceived and made to do so that they alone might take the fall if they were caught.

But there were simply too many questions to rest on any assumption firmly. Truly the Taira clan was quite a tangled web, grinning fangs and shining claws peeking out from every angle.

The only thing she could decide with certainty was that they were a threat. She made a note to inform Inuyasha that they should be placed under surveillance, if they were not already.

As a passing thought she included the clan of the future Empress in her list. She had not met any others from the clan besides Kaede and Kikyou, but according to Midoriko they had been faithful to a fault when in power.

It stood to reason that whatever remained of the clan still retained such loyalty, considering Kikyou's status in the court. Such loyalty, even in a number so small, would likely come in handy in an emergency. She made careful note of this.

She gazed thoughtfully at the column she had compiled on the Fujiwara as she completed it. It occurred to her for the first time how truly unwise a move it was for Inuyasha to keep Kikyou on as his future Empress.

Kaede had explained to her that the majority of noble unions were made on the basis of securing some kind of power or support within the court. At the time she had been very young and the thought of two people marrying for any reason other than love had seemed detestable, but here in the court she could see why such a thing might be necessary.

It seemed unlikely that Inuyasha was keeping her purely out of stupidity, though. He could be quite an idiot, but he was not stupid.

It stood to reason that the arrangement had been made before the fall of the Fujiwara clan, but there was only one real reason that Inuyasha would have carried on with the engagement after the clan's near decimation.

He was in love with her, then. It was not as if Kagome had been unaware of this before, but somehow it was shocking to actually form the thought fully in her mind. She wondered at her own reaction, shrugging it all off after a long moment of uncomfortable agitation.

Spreading all of her lists out before her on the table, Kagome nodded in satisfaction. It was good to have a bit of a feel for the position she was in here in the court. It could hardly be called conclusive, as it included none of the minor clans at work within the capital, but even so it was a start.

Abruptly Kagome frowned, realizing she had already run out of things to occupy her time. With a huffy little sigh and small grumble directed at the hanyou who had imprisoned her, she gathered her papers up and folded them neatly. She tucked them carefully away beneath her futon for safe keeping.

The small shrine out in the garden caught her attention, and she decided that she might as well meditate. That was what she was supposed to be doing while holed up in the room, anyway.

Besides which she had quite a few things that needed to be cleared with the kami. She was not sorry, certain as she was that she had taken the best course of action available to her.

Still she had claimed associations with the divine that she did not truly have, and for that she had to at least offer her apologies. She would submit herself humbly to whatever punishment they would see fit to put on her.

Kagome felt the need to re-harmonize with the rhythm of nature, as well. She had been feeling slightly off ever since her entrance into the court, her sense of innate balance obstructed by the numerous buildings that separated her from nature and the abundance of negative feelings that filled each one.

Now was certainly not the time to be losing her grip on the divine gifts the kami had given her. Not when it was finally time to put them all to full use. Nor did she particularly enjoy the feeling of isolation that sometimes crept up on her due to the loss.

The week's isolation hardly seemed such a bad thing after all, now that she was more in the right mind to consider it. It would be good for her to have some alone time to reflect on everything that had gone on.

Feeling more at ease with her unexpected situation, she pulled off her tabi socks and padded barefoot out into the garden. A broad, uncesored grin stretching the length of her face, Kagome flopped down lightly at the edge of the koi pond and slid up the legs of her hakama past the knees.

Slowly she slipped her feet into the greenish waters, a delightful shudder coursing down her spine at the stinging chill.

Ah, how she had missed this feeling of complete connection. For a brief moment she allowed herself to close her eyes and pretend that she was back in her village, waiting on the bank of the river as Souta fished for dinner.

The moment passed and Kagome chuckled quietly, the fond memories warming her.

Leaning back against her arms with her feet still dangling loosely in the water, Kagome took a deep breath and let her mind slip gently down through her body into the waters. The light, consistent clacking of the kakei lulled her. For the remainder of the day she stayed there, swaying gently in an age old dance around the fish and the water lilies.

* * *

As the night began to slip its soft, dark veil over the world, Hojo Akitoki crept timidly into her room. Worried at the lack of any sound coming from inside for so long, he had brought food as an excuse to enter.

At the sight of her, hakama rolled up to reveal slim, pale legs and leaning back in a pose of the utmost ease and vulnerability, he nearly turned tail to run.

Still he pressed on doggedly, fearing for the state of her health as she was exposed to such low temperatures. Reaching his hand out, he shook her shoulder lightly to wake her from whatever daze she had fallen into.

Wrapped in a lingering sense of complete peace, Kagome was not able to muster any embarrassment at him having caught her in such a state. She merely smiled hazily up at him. She was also only mildly concerned when she found she could no longer move her cold-numbed feet.

Alarmed, the guard, with much stuttering and many apologies, scooped her up and carried her back inside. Fetching a towel, he fought not to faint as he dried off her legs and chafed them until circulation returned and chased the mildly blue hue from her skin.

With a sleepy, absent smile Kagome thanked him. Following which she promptly crawled into her futon and fell fast asleep, losing all memory of the event amidst her dreams of talking koi fish and rivers flowing towards the ocean.

Hojo Akitoki, on the other hand, would carry that memory like a precious gem with him to the end of his life. In his recollection it would forever be the night when he first learned what it was to be in love.

* * *

The following morning Kagome awoke to a faint voice from the other side of the shoji screen. Sleepily she crawled out from the comfort of the spacious futon, sparing only a moment to wonder how she had gotten there. She decided that she must have moved herself out of the garden at some point and had simply forgotten in her post-meditation haze.

Pausing to re-tie her hair and straighten out her sleep-rumpled robes, she slid open the screen. Hojo was there, looking more bashful than ever she had seen him before with a breakfast tray placed before him. He bowed low to her, his face nearly touching the tatami mats.

"G-good morning, Kagome-sama," he stuttered, his words muffled by his proximity to the ground. "I hope I did not disturb you. I-I thought you might be hungry. You did not eat lunch or dinner yesterday."

"Thank you," Kagome said, slightly touched by his attentiveness. "That was very thoughtful of you, Hojo-sama. Oh! Hold on just a moment, would you?"

She stood and traipsed quickly back into her room, picking up her letter to Miroku and Sango from its place on the table. She returned and held it out to the guard is askance.

"If it is not too much trouble, could you perhaps deliver this to the Tachibana residence? It needs to go to Tachibana Sango-sama."

"Of course, I will be-"

"I will do it, Kagome-sama," the other guard interrupted, taking the letter from her hand before Hojo could. "You stay here and guard her, Akitoki. Y'know, just you and her."

The guard chuckled as the boy flushed scarlet. He bowed to Kagome before turning to leave, tossing a wink at Akitoki before he was entirely out of sight.

Kagome frowned, confused. Akitoki kept his gaze trained on the floor, red up to his hairline. A long moment of awkward silence passed.

"It…must get boring, standing out there all day long," Kagome said at length, wracking her brain for anything to break the tension.

"Not at all," Akitoki returned good naturedly. "As long as it is to protect Kagome-sama…"

He trailed off sheepishly, ducking his head again to cover his embarrassment. Kagome wondered if it was perhaps her new status that made him so bashful around her. It was rather puzzling. Shrugging it off as unimportant, she smiled at the guard.

"Would you like to come sit with me while I eat, Hojo-sama?" she said, feeling it rude to continue to talk with him in the doorway. "Ascetic isolation is all well and good, but I really would enjoy some company."

"Ah…If it would please you, Kagome-sama," he said, looking a little awed at the offer.

He bowed once more before stepping slowly into the room. Kagome took up the tray and went to the table, kneeling upon a cushion. He followed suit, coming to kneel timidly on the cushion opposite her.

"Your friend told me you requested a position as my guard," Kagome said, vaguely curious.

She picked up her hashi and began to eat, hoping he would keep the conversation going. His face coloring yet again, he bowed his head and nodded shyly.

"That is true. You probably do not remember this, Kagome-sama, but I was among the guards at the outer gate when you first arrived," he said. "I was privileged enough to see your very first miracle here. It was amazing, the way you healed the head guard as if it were nothing. I…I had been hoping to meet you again since that time."

"Really?" said Kagome, her face warming slightly at the praise. "But it was just a small healing. Nothing all that wonderful."

"Of course it was wonderful," objected Hojo, raising his head at last to look at her. "Your powers are truly amazing, Kagome-sama. You should give yourself more credit. I mean, you even turned out to be a Seeress. You are a link to the kami themselves."

"Ah, yes…" said Kagome quietly, the earnest awe in his face bringing forth a quick twinge of guilt.

He frowned, seeing her sudden downward shift in mood. He silently berated himself for whatever indelicacy had just come from his mouth, scouring his mind for something that might please her.

"Many people have been asking to see you, Kagome-sama," he settled on at last.

"Really?"

"Yes," he said readily, pleased when her gray eyes turned towards him once more. "They all want you to read their futures or bless their children. But the Tennō-sama has forbidden anyone from coming near you until things are all settled in the court meeting next week."

"Is that so…?"

Kagome trailed off absently, considering this new bit of information.

It was certainly a good sign if people were taking her that seriously. Although from the sound of it her vision had also stirred up a bit of chaos within the court, if it required Inuyasha keeping her isolated for an entire week. A small warmth seeped into her chest at the thought that the hanyou was indeed keeping his promise to protect her.

"Thank you for informing me, Hojo-sama," she said softly, raising her eyes to meet his.

Her expression was so gentle and her eyes so warm as she turned her face to him that for a moment Hojo could not properly draw another breath. His heart beat in odd tattoo, reminding him of the previous night's realization.

"You can call me Akitoki, if it pleases you, Kagome-sama," he managed to get out at last.

"I would like that, Akitoki-sama," Kagome returned, pleased at the prospect of having made another friend.

She beamed at him, entirely oblivious to the feelings growing every moment within his heart towards her. He returned her smile shyly, and the rest of the meal was passed with pleasant chatter about things of no great importance.

* * *

The remainder of Kagome’s week of isolation did not pass quickly, but she could hardly bring herself to mind it very much. She spent the majority of the time in meditation and prayer. She knew it was likely that she would not find peace the likes of which the room and garden provided again once she was placed back in the rushing flow of court life.

And so she whiled away her time in silence and thought and harmony. Slowly she began to feel a bit more like her previous self, connected by innumerable threads to everything about her. Once more she could hear the quiet, omnipresent song of nature humming about her. It was a great comfort.

This return of harmony to her spirit she optimistically took to be a favorable sign from the kami. Of course she still expected some form of punishment from them somewhere down the line. One could not simply blaspheme the divine and expect no punishment, and she had done what she had done knowing that full well.

But that they did not cut her off from themselves completely meant that they most likely were not entirely displeased with her actions. If she were to be bold she might even assume that they approved to some degree. Either way it was a balm to her slightly bedraggled heart to think that they would not now turn their backs on her.

In the thoughtful, hazy hours of the early mornings, Kagome was also able to reflect on all of her actions in the court. She realized she had been rushing about in a frantic manner, caught up in the pace of the court life. She resolved to move more at her own speed from then on, lest she begin to allow life in the court to twist her into something she was not.

Admittedly she had also done things in the capital that she would never have considered doing back within the small circle of her village, but that much she could write off to experience. New experiences and new situations allowed one to act in new ways, and she had not done anything too peculiar to her personality.

With perhaps two exceptions. First the killing of the guards and then her prophetic ploy. But even these things she did not regret. Rather the small, slighted cry of morals she had been raised with from birth tugged at her, insisting that she not venture off in such unfamiliar directions.

The larger part of her, however, was at peace. She did not enjoy killing those two men. She did not enjoy deceiving so many people. For both actions she had suffered and would most likely continue to suffer.

Still a person could only walk the path that they felt to be right, understanding that sometimes it would be painful and most times it would conflict with other equally valid paths. Her father had tried to explain all of this to her when she was young, but only now was she truly beginning to understand what he had meant.

In the end Kagome knew that all of the things she had been taught were good and solid, and she had no intention of going senselessly up against them. But the time had more than come when she had to find the things that were right for her, rather than just the things that were right. She was choosing her own path now, and in that knowledge she was secure. She would not falter.

In the time she had she was also able to speak more with Akitoki. He was attentive to her needs to a fault, bringing her tea, regular meals, and even extra blankets when he felt that it was too cold for her to sleep through the night without them. A few times he even fetched herbs and tonics for her, stuttering out that he feared for her health now that the temperatures were truly beginning to drop.

They would talk through the screen during such times, or Kagome might invite him in to sit on the porch with her. She always invited the other guard, as well, though he consistently refused her offers with a sly nod to his friend.

Often times, left with so much time and so little to do, Kagome's thoughts would stray back to her family. It had been some time since she had had the leisure to think much on them, and in the silence of that room the homesickness that their memory evoked was often unbearable. Twice she picked up a brush and paper, the half-formed idea to write to Inuyasha of her troubles spurring her on.

In the end she always dismissed this notion as foolish, and in these times, too, she would go to talk to Akitoki. He was patient with her as she babbled on about the home and the loved ones she had left behind, and in return she asked him to tell her his own story.

It turned out that he was indeed the son of a lesser clan within the court and a second son, at that. He aspired to some day serve the Tennō as a commander among his guards.

He was truly a good man, and at the end of the week Kagome felt that she had gained another good, solid friend. At times, though, she would catch him staring at her so intently that it was unnerving. She had no notion of what to make of these instances and ended up dismissing them uncomfortably as some personality quirk of the guard's.

At last, though, the week did come to a close and Kagome received yet another brief note from the Tennō, telling her to be ready for a court meeting the following day. Several serving women then came to fetch her and she said her goodbyes to the guardsmen, promising to visit Akitoki soon at his clan's residence.

She was taken back to the future Empress' residence and cleaned up before being placed in a new, larger chamber. Half-expecting to finally be able to receive visitors, she was disappointed when a servant informed her that no one was yet allowed near her until after the meeting the following day.

Kagome had lain down to sleep then, figuring that she would need all of her wits about her to cope with whatever was to come. Sleeping, however, proved a bit difficult. Through the whole of the night she could sense several figures hovering just outside of the shoji screen enclosing her room.

It was obvious enough that they were servants eager to get a look at the newly revealed Seeress. That, however, did not make the feel of their intent gazes roving her supposedly slumbering form any less disconcerting. She passed a night almost entirely devoid of sleep, longing ironically enough for the confines of her peaceful room in the Chūwain.

* * *

Kagome was roused late the next morning, as the meeting was not until the afternoon. She was ushered into yet another room where the servants went about washing, brushing, and redressing her. She was glad to find she would be allowed to wear miko robes to the ceremony, being that she was appearing in the capacity of a spiritualist.

When she was finally deemed presentable the servants brought her food, but Kagome could hardly force any down. Her stomach already felt full with anticipation of what was to come. The memory of her first disastrous court meeting refused to leave her alone, flashing in broken bits and pieces through her head.

Morosely she wished for Inuyasha or Miroku or Sango to appear and work her out of the rut she was fast falling into, or at least to talk to her a bit about what to expect. Even Kikyou and her cool reprimands that it was foolish of her to be worried over such a thing would have been welcome.

No one came, though, and Kagome was forced to try and shake the cloud off all on her own when two guards came to fetch her. They led her in silence to the Daigokuden, instructing her to wait at the door until it was opened and the Tennō called her forward. It seemed that all of the courtiers were already situated inside, the meeting in progress.

She was left alone then. For a seeming eternity she stood there before the grand doorway, tense and ill. Silently she cursed Inuyasha, wishing he would hurry up and just let her in already. She wondered petulantly if he was punishing her for acting so freely on her own.

And then the doors were pulled open. Kagome thought her heart might burst as she heard Inuyasha's voice resound through the room, calling her forward. She took one wooden step forward before freezing.

Hundreds of pairs of curious and guarded and hostile and awed and expectant eyes were trained intensely on her every movement. The chamber was utterly silent save the flapping and flicking of fans, moving in so many varied gestures that Kagome could hardly make out a single one of them. In the midst of that sea of anonymous faces and violently bright colors, Kagome felt she might drown.

She forced her legs back into motion, ducking her head to stare at the wood floor beneath her as she went. Murmuring rippled throughout the crowd as she passed, but Kagome dared not look up again until she reached the foot of the dais on which Inuyasha and the future Empress were seated.

Kikyou, of course, wore the mask of utter apathy that seemed always to slip down over her features in the presence of groups of nobles, kneeling with rigid authority at the right hand of the Tennō. Inuyasha was concealed behind his slatted screen, but Kagome could clearly feel his gaze upon her.

"Take your place," came the rough order from behind the screen.

Kagome frowned, puzzled by the command. She noticed then a second cushion placed on the dais at the Tennō's left hand side. Her eyes widened and she hesitated, wondering if Inuyasha would really go so far as that.

"Your place, Miko-sama," Kikyou spoke, gesturing vaguely with her fan to the cushion.

Kagome fought not to gape at the two figures, bowing low to them to cover her consternation. A seat on the same level as the future Empress! Inuyasha was pushing things too far!

Still she did not wish to make a scene. Keeping her face carefully neutral, Kagome climbed the few steps of the dais and knelt solemnly on the cushion. The chatter of the crowd increased tenfold in noise, and it was not hard to tell that there were a number of courtiers who were far more outraged than Kagome had been at the move.

"Be quiet!" barked Inuyasha, loudly enough that it reverberated throughout the entire room.

The courtiers ceased their chatter and fell grudgingly silent, like small children scolded by a parent.

"You've heard an account of what occurred during the women's outing from Our future Empress," he continued, and Kagome could only assume he was referring to what had occurred before her entrance. "Now We will allow questions. Stand if you've got something to say."

Several courtiers rose up throughout the room.

"Minamoto Youji, speak," said Inuyasha, acknowledging the man.

"Your Majesty," returned the Minamoto man, bowing. "To the Miko-sama, I would ask if you have ever experienced such an occurrence before?"

"If you mean have I ever had vision before, then the answer would be no, Minamoto-sama," Kagome responded, intending to stick as closely to the truth as possible. "I can only interpret this new gift as a show of approval from the kami of my service to the Tennō-sama."

"I see," retuned the man thoughtfully. He bowed once more before sitting.

From the corner of her eye, Kagome caught a look from the future Empress that was almost approving in nature. Pride curled quietly inside of her, lending a bit more confidence.

"Michinaga Youhei, speak," ordered Inuyasha, acknowledging the next man.

"Your Majesty," said Youhei, mimicking the Minamoto man's bow. "I would also address the Miko-sama. How can she be certain that it was not some possession, some evil spirit's attempt to mislead us?"

"I have been performing exorcisms in my village since I was young, Michinaga-sama," Kagome said firmly, a little offended by the suggestion. "Never once have I myself been possessed. My body is holy vessel, and I would be aware should the likes of an evil spirit try to defile it."

"Taira Kagura-sama can attest to the fact that it was no evil spirit, as well," Kikyou added when the man did not look quite satisfied. "She told us as much after the vision took place. She could sense no jyaki. Rather Miko-sama's aura conflicted with her own youki. Is that not right, Kagura-sama?"

Kagura, already standing, turned a stony look on the future Empress.

"That…is correct, Fujiwara-sama," she admitted grudgingly, and Kagome could almost hear her teeth grinding in frustration.

"Then it is as you say, Fujiwara-sama," conceded Michinaga, bowing to her. "Thank you. And may I say, on behalf of my clan, welcome to you, Miko-sama."

He resumed his seat. Several others followed his lead. It seemed that Kagura's testimony was particularly convincing to many. Still the youkai woman remained standing, her red eyes smoldering.

"Taira Kagura, speak," Inuyasha called, acknowledging her.

"Your Majesty," said Kagura stiffly, giving the most perfunctory of bows. "I have no questions. Rather I have an assertion. And that is, that this vision is an inauthentic one. Merely a fluke. Some delusion or mad fit of the girl's addled mind."

The court erupted in a rush of noise. Fans flapped frantically about as the courtiers twisted this way and that to speak to their neighbors, everyone eager to voice their own opinion. Kagura stood above them all, observing the chaos she had created with satisfaction. Kagome gaped at the woman, blown away by her audacity.

"Shut up, all of you!" Inuyasha bellowed, rising to stand behind the screen. "What the he-…What do you base this opinion on, Kagura?"

"Merely the basic knowledge that all of us courtiers are given from birth," responded Kagura with a dismissive flick of her fan. "She was born low for a reason. The kami showed her no favor then. They certainly would not show anyone of her standing favor now. It was a _fluke_."

Kagome bit back a cry of indignation. There was no logic behind her claim at all. Not the slightest hint! It was like saying that a man afflicted by bad fortune could never hope to have good fortune by simple virtue of the fact that he had never had it before. Nor had she even attempted to explain the water flooding exactly as and when Kagome predicted it.

Though at least it meant the youkai woman did not know the truth of the matter, as Kagome had feared she might for a moment. She was merely trying to cast doubt on her any way that she could, stirring suspicions up among the coutiers. And from the look on her face Kagome would guess she knew full well that there was no reason to back up her objection.

She also knew that none was needed. Scanning the room, Kagome could see many fans waved in sweeping gestures of agreement and consent. The faces of many of the courtiers had turned suddenly suspicious at the reminder of her status in the world.

That the commoners of the world were not the favored of the kami was indeed something they had all been told from the days of their youths. They would no more think to question such a statement than they would the rising and setting of the sun each day.

Her heart sank in her chest. There was nothing she could think of to counter such an attack, ambiguous as it was. Inuyasha and Kikyou were silent, seemingly at a loss, as well.

"You would claim, then, to know the hearts and minds of the kami, Taira-sama?"

Many heads turned almost as one towards the figure that had just appeared in the open doorway of the Daigokuden. For a moment the person was obscured by the flood of light coming in from behind them, but then the figure stepped with stately purpose into the room.

It was Midoriko.

Gasps and astonished whispers fluttered frantically throughout the mass of people. Kagura's face fell abruptly, a vague snarl curling the corners of her lips. Midoriko paid no heed to any of the confusion her appearance had caused, stepping with serene authority up to the foot of the dais.

"Midoriko-sama," Kikyou addressed the woman, something like surprise arching her brows the slightest bit. "It is unusual that you would deign to grace us with your presence during a court function. Might I ask your purpose here?"

"Talk of the kami and prophetic visions," Midoriko replied. "If such things are not of my concern as the court spiritualist, then I do not know whose concern they would be. Besides which, Kagome is a disciple of mine. Her affairs are also my concern."

She bowed slightly before turning to face Kagura, her eyes trained with imposing steadiness on the youkai woman's face. Kagura held her ground, though her blood red lips curled further downwards in her obvious displeasure.

"To return to my previous question, you would claim special knowledge of the kami, Taira Kagura-sama?" Midoriko reiterated, her tone utterly placid.

The crowd had gone silent, even the fans having slowed to irregular little sweeps here and there. Kagome found that she was holding her breath.

"On this matter I believe we all know the minds of the kami. We have been taught it from the time of our youths," Kagura said stiffly.

"Ah, I see," said Midoriko. "Then you believe that the kami bend their divine will to whatever teachings that courtiers happen to agree upon? You would contend that the holy truth that they create follows only after the teachings of court scholars? You would argue that the will of the kami comes second to the will of man?"

"I did not say any of that," Kagura said, raising her voice slightly though there had barely been even a hint of challenge in Midoriko's voice. "I said rather that on this point we all understand what the opinions of the kami are, based on what knowledge they gave to our teachers in times of old and that has been passed on to us."

"Still you claim knowledge of divine minds, Taira-sama," Midoriko pointed out mildly. "You now would venture to argue that simply because the kami perhaps once told something to man, it has become a law restricting them.”

“You say, Taira-sama, though perhaps not so clearly and not in so many words, that divine will is a concrete thing. That it as soon as it is spoken by man, it never again alters.“

“That under no circumstances and in no situation might the kami see fit to work through different channels or in different manners than the ones which they might once have mentioned to our ancestors so long ago.”

“Is this truly what you believe, Taira-sama?"

"…Of course not," Kagura ground out after a long, tense silence. "I misspoke, Midoriko-sama."

It was clear enough that she was only conceding due to the fact that she would lose all credibility should she continue to try and defend what Midoriko had so clearly revealed to be a blasphemous assertion. Silently Kagome cheered, grateful to the elder miko for ripping apart Kagura's illogical statement when she could not.

"As the best among us sometimes do, Taira-sama," Midoriko allowed, the faintest of smiles gracing her lips. "Though in the future I would advise you not to question the work of the kami when the evidence of their will has been laid out so clearly before you. You will often find that they do not take lightly such offenses."

Not bothering even to bow to the court spiritualist, Kagura stiffly resumed her seat. Midoriko turned once more to face the dais. Show bowed again before the Tennō and the future Empress.

"I had another purpose in coming here, Tennō-sama," she said. "As I have already stated, Kagome-sama is my disciple. Therefore I wished to come and attest before the entire court, to any like Taira-sama that may have doubts, that her vision was a true one.”

“She is one beloved of and blessed by the kami. Her aura has told this to me truly enough since first we met. Regrettably I was not present to witness the miracle that occurred during the women's outing, but I have had many years to learn to listen to the voice of the kami when I feel they are trying to speak to me.”

“I am certain they are speaking to me now in various ways, telling me to support Kagome-dams in all of her endeavors. Thus I now give my word as to her authenticity and would take upon myself any claims against her. Her words and actions are now as good as my own."

Absolute silence. No one moved. It seemed that no one was even breathing.

"Does anyone want to bring their complaints up on this up against the O-Miko?" Inuyasha's voice resounded in the silence.

Fans resumed their tentative flapping, courtiers turning this way and that to see if any of their fellows dared rise and challenge the formidable woman. None did, and a long moment passed in silence.

"Then this meeting is over," declared the Tennō. "And you all understand where Kagome stands in this court now. As Our personal servant and Midoriko's disciple, she is not to be crossed."

There was a moment of hesitation before the courtiers began to rise and slowly file out of the building. From the bits and pieces she could see, Kagome could get no firm handle on the reaction of the nobles. She absently resigned herself to going about once things were more settled to find out.

More so, though, she was concerned with the O-Miko still standing at the foot of the dais. Inappropriately enough the woman was gazing _up_ at her, her steadfast brown eyes trained on her face. As much as she wanted to, Kagome could not seem to look away.

This holy, revered woman had just lied for her to the entire court. Whether or not she was aware that she had lied was questionable, but nonetheless she had. On top of that she had given Kagome the ultimate vote of confidence by tying her reputation firmly to the village girl's own.

Kagome felt ill. She wondered if perhaps this was her punishment from the kami; to taint the name of such a holy woman. Silently she railed at the unjustness of Midoriko being degraded for her choices.

"Kagome, would you walk with me?" Midoriko asked as the last of the crowd exited the room.

"Yes, of course," Kagome replied faintly, rising and stepping down from her seat sullenly.

She was obscurely grateful to finally be able to break eye contact with the woman. She felt she might burst into tears like a fool were she forced to meet those bright, clear eyes any longer.

"Oi, Kagome."

Kagome turned back to look at the screen. She could see the outline of Inuyasha standing behind it. She wondered distractedly if he was pleased with the way things had turned out.

"My chambers, tomorrow morning."

"Of course, Tennō-sama," she responded automatically, her heart sinking a little further at the fact that he did not sound pleased in the least.

She bowed before trailing after Midoriko out of the building, unaware of the hanyou peering uneasily out after her from behind the screen.

* * *

The two miko walked out into the sharp chill of the winter air in silence, wandering on along a random path. Kagome could not even bring herself to open her mouth to thank the older woman, despite how much she knew she owed her. Guilt sat heavily upon her shoulders, bowing her head towards the ground.

"You do not look happy, Kagome, despite this good turn of fate in your favor," commented Midoriko at last. "Perhaps you are not pleased with my interference?"

"No! No, nothing like that, Midoriko-sama," Kagome said hastily, shaken slightly from her miserable daze. "Truly I am more grateful than I can say to receive such support from you. It is far more than one in my position should be allowed to ask for, to have such a revered figure as yourself tie your honor to my own. But…"

"I do not want to know, Kagome," interrupted Midoriko gently.

"What?"

Kagome frowned, coming to a halt. She scanned the elder miko's face questioningly.

"About the vision," Midoriko clarified, stopping as well to meet her searching eyes. "We discussed once before something possibly questionable that you were considering doing for the sake of your purpose here.”

“I do not wish to know if the vision was part of that. I do not wish to know if it was real. I do not wish to know if it was false. I will believe in you, Kagome. Whatever happens or has happened, I choose to believe in you."

Kagome gaped at the woman. She shook her head slightly, wondering if she had heard properly.

Midoriko had spoken up for her with the knowledge that she might very well be making a liar of herself. It was nearly incomprehensible.

"But, Midoriko-sama-"

"Did you think you were the only one choosing your own path, Kagome?" the noblewoman cut in, her expression softening around the edges. "I am choosing mine, as well, even at this advanced age. This is my decision, regardless of anything else. I made no false claim when I said that the kami are leading me to support you.”

“Besides which, I promised that I would care for you. The kami certainly can not look with favor on one who does not keep their promises."

For a moment Kagome could get no solid hold on any words. She floundered in the sudden upwelling of emotion in her chest, grasping around for any one feeling to hold on to.

At last her face crumpled, tears springing to her eyes at the kind devotion of this woman. She bowed low, hiding her pitiful expression.

"Thank you, Midoriko-sama," she said. "I will do my best not to disappoint you."

"My happiness will not rest on your actions, Kagome. I am merely making the decision I feel to be best," responded Midoriko, not unkindly. "Come, we will take tea together. After that we can meditate for a time, and you can clear your head."

"Yes," Kagome sniffled, nodding. "That would be nice, Midoriko-sama."

"Come along, then," Midoriko said, a sliver of affection slipping into her tone. "Dry your eyes. You are the Tennō-sama’s miko now. We cannot have anyone seeing you in such a state."

Kagome nodded, rising up from her bow to rub at her watery eyes. Midoriko caught her hand softly, lifting her own trailing sleeve to wipe at her face. Kagome flushed, chuckling slightly as more tears dribbled from her eyes. It was hard for her to believe her own good fortune at times like these.

As Midoriko had said, she must be one of the favored by the kami.

* * *

The following morning Kagome rose early. She ate, dressed, fixed her hair, washed her face, and quickly headed to the Jijūden to meet with Inuyasha. She had a feeling that he would give her a harder time than she was certain he already intended to should she not be prompt in her appearance.

At least the time she had spent with Midoriko the previous day had put her once more at ease, after having been so thoroughly shaken during the court meeting. Together they had discussed her aims in the court and how she planned on going about achieving them, the elder miko providing what bits of advice she could here and there. Midoriko had maintained that she would support her in all of her endeavors, and they had meditated with positive energy on their purposes until nightfall.

Now, confident in her aims and beginning to feel excited over the nearly perfect success of her ploy, Kagome strode through the gardens, the Shishinsen, and over the water walkway to the Jijūden where she was prepared to argue down the sovereign of her nation. The guard bowed out of her way without comment at the entrance to Inuyasha's chambers, and Kagome felt a small twinge of gratification at the obvious influence of her new status.

She halted in the entryway, surprised. There was no screen in sight, merely Inuyasha lounging on a pile of cushions with an official looking document held up before his face. She realized suddenly that they no longer had to bother with such things, and a smile stretched inexorably across her face. It was a rather wonderful sort of feeling, the sudden glowing sensation inside her chest.

"Good morning, Inuyasha-sama," she chirped, deciding to start the encounter off on a positive note.

The hanyou looked up from the paper, his scowl twisting incredulously at her. He glanced behind her at the entryway, apparently gauging the amount of light outside.

"You're early," he said at last.

Kagome's cheerful expression faltered slightly. It seemed there would be no distracting him from the ill humor he had fallen into. Nonetheless she gave a bow before coming to kneel down across from him.

"You said yesterday you wished to see me this morning, Inuyasha-sama."

"Yeah," Inuyasha agreed, putting the paper aside. "We need to talk about all the shit that's happened."

"You mean all of the things I made happen?" Kagome ventured.

"Yeah, that. I… I can't believe you went through with it."

There was something like disappointment in the way that he refused to meet her eyes. A pang shot through Kagome's chest, and she found herself leaning forward with a quick defense ready on the tip of her tongue.

"You told me that as long as I could pull it off it was fine," she argued. "I will apologize for perhaps acting too freely, Inuyasha-sama, but I acted nonetheless. It worked, too! I thought you would be pleased that-"

"That's not what I'm talking about!" Inuyasha snapped, his eyes flashing briefly in her direction. "I'm talking about the fact that you did it at all! The fact that your conscience never stepped in to stop you!"

"My conscience?"

"Yes, your fucking conscience!" Inuyasha snapped, becoming more and more worked up as he thought about it. "Or have you forgotten it already?! Dammit, woman! You weren't… like _this_ when you got here!"

"I…don't understand, Inuyasha-sama," said Kagome slowly, searching his averted face with her eyes.

"You…you!..." Inuyasha said, rising to pace the length of the room in agitation. "What you did…it's the fucking same type of thing that any slimy courtier might've pulled to get power! I didn't want…!"

Unable to quite express the stinging, roiling sensation in his chest, Inuyasha flopped back down a good distance from her. He turned forceful gold eyes upon her at last, willing her to explain herself.

"You…fear that I am turning into one of them, then?" Kagome said at last, trying to puzzle through all the things he had said and all of the things he had not said.

"…Yeah," Inuyasha said lowly, his gaze dropping as his ire cooled a bit at her quiet tone.

"You are…afraid I will turn on you?"

"Maybe eventually. But now…you're just _turning_. This place'll twist you. If this is how it's going to be…I'd be better off just sending you back."

That was right. If keeping her as his servant was going to make her into just another blank face among the vicious, clawing masses of the court, then he wanted no part of it.

He could hardly claim to understand Kagome most of the time, but he knew enough to know that she would come to hate herself should she become like the rest. He would not watch that happen to her. He could not watch that happen to her.

It was…uncomfortable, though. True enough he had placed her in isolation that she might be away from the wrath of any of the courtiers who might be upset with the sudden turn, but somehow he had also wanted her to…repent, maybe. To come out of it feeling bad for what she had done. To show him that she was still the same girl he had first argued with that night under the Goshinboku.

But she was proud. There was no remorse. And it irked him, irked him so much that his chest burned, but he would not keep her any longer. Not to turn her into this.

"Inuyasha-sama…" Kagome said gently, pinpointing at last the unlikely culprit beneath all of the snarling. 

He was worried for her.

"Inuyasha-sama," she repeated softly, willing him to look at her. "I think you've misunderstood me. I did not do this…with a heart full of the idea of gaining power."

"Oh? Then why did you do it, Kagome?" he said with biting skepticism, eyeing her warily. To his ears such words could only ring as similar to the beginnings of every other courtier's defense of angling for power.

"I…" Kagome began, flushing but still raising her eyes determinedly to meet his own. "I did it for you. I…want to help you, Inuyasha-sama, as your friend. Remember?"

The hanyou froze, struck dumb by the unexpected response. Her cheeks were tinted deeply pink, a painfully earnest kindness in her eyes as they met his own. It was so honest that it almost hurt to look at, and still Inuyasha could not turn away. 

His heart gave an awkward, smarting jump in his chest. He raised a hand to rub at it absently.

"And I know it will likely be hard for you to understand, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome said, shaking her head. "But it was something I felt I had to do. It was a choice I had to make.”

“I feel terribly for having lied to so many people, truly I do, but I do not regret my choice to do it. And any punishment that I will receive down the line, I will humbly accept. But, well…ah, it sounds more complicated when I try to explain it all out loud."

"I think...I get it," Inuyasha murmured, finally managing to tear his gaze away. "I get it already. Just… _stop_."

It was too much. It was too much. He could not look at that expression on her face any longer or he might...he was not certain what he would do. His chest was tight with… _something_.

On the up side, there could be no courtier's malice or scheming behind such a face. That much he knew.

She could remain in the court, then. Inuyasha scowled as the odd flittering sensation started up again in his stomach. He wondered if the food he had eaten for breakfast had been spoiled.

"Are you alright, Inuyasha-sama?" Kagome asked, frowning. "You…don't look well."

It was true. He was red almost to the tips of his ears and had suddenly started clutching his stomach.

"I'm fine, wench," the hanyou bit out roughly.

He shook his head almost violently, forcing himself back into order. He turned a scowl on her, perhaps one more forceful than was necessary. She blanched slightly.

"I guess I'll take your word this time," he allowed snappishly. "You can go now."

"That…is all?" Kagome said, thrown by the abrupt dismissal.

"I have a Council meeting soon," Inuyasha said, eager to be done with this encounter. "Thanks to all the shit you've stirred up, it'll probably last 'til late tonight."

"…Alright, then," Kagome said, a bit baffled at the quick turn of things. "I suppose I will be going. Might we meet tomorrow? I would like to discuss the Council's reaction to things, and I'm sure we didn't quite cover everything today."

"Fine," Inuyasha said reluctantly.

"Good," Kagome smiled. "I will be going then."

She bowed before turning to leave, oddly pleased that she had managed to secure time with him the next day. The confusing encounter of just moments before had been awfully brief after a slightly more than a week's separation.

In the entryway Kagome paused, a thought occurring to her suddenly. She turned back to find the hanyou staring rather intensely after her. He quickly averted his eyes when she caught him, red dusting the ridges of his cheeks.

"Would you mind if we met somewhere other than your chambers tomorrow, Inuyasha-sama?" she ventured. "Maybe somewhere outdoors? Now that we don't have to bother with such pretenses and all…"

"Whatever," he snorted, staring hard at the wall.

"Good," Kagome responded. "Pick any spot you like and send a servant to tell me, alright? See you then, Inuyasha-sama."

Inuyasha grunted in response, forcing himself to keep his eyes on the wall as he heard her trot out of the room. She certainly sounded pleased with herself. He scowled, wondering how she could be so chipper.

He felt inexplicably unbalanced. At least his stomach had stopped acting up, though. He would really have to look in to picking another cook to prepare his meals.

Nodding to himself, Inuyasha rose to retrieve the document he had been going over before her interruption. As his eyes scanned the pages unseeingly, he tried to recall the last time anyone had done anything for him simply because they wanted to _._

He could hardly recall a single instance. Kagome's straightforward grey eyes seemed to pierce him once more, and his heart twinged oddly in his chest again.

The hanyou growled. Now he had heartburn, as well. He made a mental note to definitely find a new cook.


	11. Of Trust and the Taira

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our mini-history lesson for today:
> 
> -sode- can also translate to 'sleeve', but in the instance I use it it refers to the shoulder guards in a suit of Japanese armor. Keep in mind also that Japanese armor was for the most part heavy leather rather than metal like a knight's suit of armor.
> 
> This allowed for a larger range of motion and quicker movement, with light metal plating on the shoulders, chest, and thighs. Full battle armor consisted of more metal and a helmet, but as far as the guard armor in the court goes it was relatively light.
> 
> -'marriageable age'- women of the Heian period might marry as young as 13 years old (partially because the average life expectancy of the time was 30/40 years old, but that’s a subject for another time). Most commonly they married at around the age of 16 or so, though there are always exceptions here and there. Men, on the other hand, usually married in their 20s or 30s. 
> 
> -wakizashi- a Japanese sword. Lighter and shorter than a traditional katana. Sango carries one (though she rarely uses it) in the actual series
> 
> Anyways, on with the story!

* * *

After her meeting with the hanyou, Kagome decided that it was about time to pay a visit to Miroku and Sango. Oddly elated, she only just managed to keep her pace properly sedate as she left the confines of the Dairi and headed towards Sango's residence.

It began to snow lightly as she made her way, scattered flakes drifting slowly down from the darkened sky to dust the pathways and tops of buildings. Kagome reveled in it, loving the crisp, clean feel that the air always seemed to take on when it snowed.

Unfortunately it also brought out several groups of court women, admiring the gently floating flakes as they strolled about beneath their light paper parasols. Kagome did her best to avoid these groups, though with little success.

Each time she happened to stumble into the path of the women they would all freeze, as if seeing a wandering spirit emerge from the light drifts of snow. They regarded her with painted eyes that were at once skeptical and nearly awed.

Slowly, ever so slowly and uncertainly, they would bend in the slightest of bows to her. Without a word Kagome would return it, though she was rather at a loss as to whether or not it was still appropriate for her to bow to them.

Hurriedly she would then be on her way once more, conspiratorial whispers rasping along on the air behind her. Still she was pleased, despite the disconcerting nature of the women's new behavior. That they would bow, that they would consider her with such attentive eyes, meant at least that they were thinking seriously of all she had done. Most definitely a good sign.

Even so she resolved herself to being wary for a time. The feelings they expressed before her may very well not be the same things they felt when in the privacy of their own circles. The tide of opinion was, as she had learned from the rumor scandal, fickle and easily reversed.

At length she reached the Tachibana residence. She was allowed immediate entrance, despite her lack of invitation. A servant led her to a back quarter of the residence where Sango was sitting with the cousin that Kagome had met at the outing with the court women.

The two, to Kagome's surprise upon her entrance, were polishing weapons. It looked a bit absurd, two women in such fine dress and elegant ornaments with hulking weapons in their laps.

Despite her joy at once more being able to see Sango, Kagome was slightly disappointed. With the cousin present there was no way that she could speak freely. Still she put on a smile for them both and embraced Sango warmly when the woman rose to greet her.

For a time the three sat and chatted idly about this and that as the two taiji-ya continued their work. The subject of the court meeting and Kagome's vision was skirted around tactfully by all, none of them quite knowing how to approach the subject while in the confines of such company. Still Sango managed to send Kagome a few looks that told the miko clearly that they would find time later to discuss it.

At length Sango rose, placing the weighty, gleaming Hiraikotsu back on the wall alongside the rest of the clan weapons with an ease that was astounding to behold in such a slight frame. She left for a moment to instruct a servant to bring tea and summon the houshi from his residence, as she assumed he would also like to see Kagome again.

He arrived just after the tea was served, and the four whiled away the remainder of the morning and all of the afternoon with good food and easy conversation. Kagome enjoyed the time, despite not being able to thank Miroku and Sango for their part in the resolution of the rumor or to talk to them about the vision. Sango's cousin proved to be quite the sensible, straightforward woman, and it was nice for the miko to allow her mind to be at ease for a time.

As afternoon began to creep into evening she had to ask for their pardon. She needed to organize a few things before her meeting with the Tennō the next morning. Reluctantly they allowed her to go with kind words and the promise to meet again, Miroku and Sango pulling her aside momentarily to promise that they would find time to talk more intimately later.

She returned to the Dairi after a few more awkward encounters with courtiers out strolling in the snow. For a time she stopped within the confines of the Dairi’s walls to admire the light layer of snow that now lay in a thin coat over the land.

The world always seemed to stretch on forever when it was covered in such a white, and more than ever she felt that she could understand the oneness of things during such times. Lightly she shuffled her feet to leave tracks as she went, marking her own little place in the grand scheme of things.

At length, her fingers and toes having gone numb at the tips, she reached Kikyou's residence and returned to her new room within it. As a passing thought she wondered if she should perhaps go to see the future Empress that she might clear up her new situation with her. She hesitated, though, uncertain if she was really ready to face the imposing woman.

Certainly the future Empress had seemed to accept her vision without objection during the women's outing and had even been one of the major reasons that the vision had been a success. Still Kagome understood well enough what a sharp woman Kikyou was, and she was not yet confident she could face those unyielding brown eyes without faltering.

In the end she merely returned to her new room in the residence, deciding it was best to let that meeting happen whenever it would happen. Hopefully by that time her footing would be steadier as far as the reactions in the court were concerned.

In the safety and privacy of her new, rather lavish room she pulled out the lists she had compiled while in isolation. She stepped back out for a moment to ask a servant to have a brush and ink stone brought to her before returning to organize the papers and review what she had written.

When the servant brought the requested materials she began to make a few notes here and there, just little things that she had noticed or remembered since she had first written the list. At length she set her work aside that the ink might dry for a time, catching another servant to request that dinner be brought.

She smiled to herself as she ate the meal in silence. Surely Inuyasha would have to give her credit for such efforts, even if he was still a bit upset over the vision. She could hardly wait to show him all of the hard work she had put in.

When she finished her food, she returned the tray and dishes to a servant before going back to reorganize her dried papers. She folded them up and tucked them away neatly beneath her pillow.

A servant came in to prepare her for bed as she finished up, and Kagome realized suddenly that she had managed to while away her entire day. She was surprised also by the servant, asking the woman who had sent her.

The woman looked puzzled for a bit before replying that no one had sent her. It was only proper, she said, that someone of her station should be readied always by attendants. The only reason they had not dressed her that very morning was due to the fact that she had risen and left so early on her own.

After that she submitted quietly to the woman's attentions as she dressed her, combed out the length of her hair, and washed her face and hands. The prospect of being prepared every morning and evening by servants was not a particularly appealing one, though she supposed she should be glad to be treated with such honor.

Still it seemed rather troublesome. She made a mental note to ask Inuyasha if there was any way around it.

She thanked the woman and bid her goodnight as she finished her task and departed. Blowing out several lanterns scattered throughout the room, Kagome crawled into her futon. She shifted onto her side to watch the snow dancing just outside one of the high windows of her room, absently grinning as she reflected on what was to come the next morning.

Finally things seemed to be moving in the direction she had hoped for. She could not help but think that soon she and Inuyasha would be able to really start fixing things.

Her last thought was to wonder where exactly Inuyasha would decide to meet with her, before she slipped off into a peaceful slumber.

* * *

A servant woke her the following morning as the sun was beginning to climb into the sky. She informed her that a servant from the Tennō was waiting for her to get ready that he might bring her to meet with his Majesty.

Kagome rose and submitted once more to the attentions of a servant, requesting only that she be allowed to wear miko robes rather than a juni-hito. The servant did not question this, and Kagome was happy to realize that her new position as a court spiritualist would allow her to get away with wearing miko robes much more often. It was a relief to know she would be able to avoid the accursed restriction of a juni-hito for a time.

She refused breakfast when it was offered to her, not particularly hungry and not wanting to keep Inuyasha waiting too long for her. Tucking her papers away into the front of her robes, she went out to the gate of the residence to where she was told his servant was waiting.

To her surprise she found Hojo Akitoki there, fiddling anxiously with the sode of his light guard armor. He looked up as she arrived, his face flushing happily before he bobbed in an ungainly sort of bow.

"Good morning, Kagome-sama."

"Good morning, Akitoki-sama," Kagome said, bowing in return. "I apologize for making you wait. You are the one the Tennō-sama sent to fetch me?"

Pink tinged the tips of the young guard's ears, his expression turning still more bashful. He gave her a small, shy smile.

"No, actually," he replied sheepishly. "His Majesty had assigned a different guard to do it really. But that guard was talking about it during our watch together last night, and I asked if I might do it in his stead. I…well, I wanted to see you."

He managed to raise his head to look her in the eye, his expression acutely embarrassed yet oddly sincere. Kagome faltered, certain that something important was going on but uncertain exactly what it was. She settled for the most sensible explanation after a moment.

"You wanted to check on me after the court incident, right?" she said, offering him a smile. "Thank you, Akitoki-sama. You really are very kind."

Akitoki's expression fell slightly, though he managed still to smile weakly. The young guard was not one to be easily turned from his chosen course.

"Not at all, Kagome-sama," he said. "After all, I would like you to be able to depend on me. Shall we go, then? His Majesty wishes to meet with you in one of his personal gardens along the edge of the Kenreimon gate."

"Ah, yes. I should not keep the Tennō-sama waiting long. Lead the way, please."

Akitoki bowed slightly and started off in the general direction of the Jijūden, Kagome at his side. He stole shy glances at her as they went, admiring the fineness of her features in the light of early morning.

"Are you not tired, Akitoki-sama?" Kagome asked as they went. "You said you had watch last night, and then to get up so early just to fetch me this morning. Truly I am sorry to be such a burden."

"Rising early and remaining awake late into the night are things I am accustomed to as a guard, Kagome-sama. And it is hardly as if you asked me to go to any trouble," Akitoki said good-naturedly. "I wanted to do something for you. Even if I was tired, I would gladly rise early to see you."

Kagome laughed slightly, covering over her uncertainty. Again there was that nagging feeling that she was not quite catching something important. And the look in his eyes, that devoted sort of concentration, was familiar somehow. She struggled to recall where she had seen it before.

"Truly you are too kind to me, Akitoki-sama," she said at last. "I wonder, how long have you been working in the service of his Majesty?"

"Oh, I have been working as an imperial guard since I was fifteen, though I have been training since I was about thirteen," Akitoki answered. "Since I am a second son, and the son of a lesser clan, at that, I have to work for my place in this court."

"That is something," Kagome said admiringly. "All that hard work, I mean. And you say since you were fifteen? How old are you now, Akitoki-sama? Somehow I thought we were close in age."

"I will turn twenty one next season, Kagome-sama. My parents…are beginning to encourage me to find a bride," the young guard ventured, rather boldly in his opinion.

"Is that so?" asked Kagome, quietly surprised at the age difference between them. "Kaede-sama always told me that men of the court did not usually consider marriage until they reached their thirties. I suppose it is different for a second son, then?"

"…Yes, Kagome-sama," Akitoki replied, disappointed that she had not so much as blinked to acknowledge the hint.

They were a ways beyond the Jijūden now, having skirted around the building to get behind it. They seemed almost to be entering a snow glazed forest, if not for the well-ordered nature of the foliage. In fact it was a series of large gardens made and kept especially for the use of the Tennō and any of his consorts.

Akitoki thought hard on how he might rally as they walked beneath the branches of the trees on the outer edge of the garden. In the time that they had been apart he had resolved himself, and he refused to give up until he made his intentions clear.

"You know, Kagome-sama," he tried again, swallowing down his embarrassment forcefully. "There is a girl I have in mind."

"For a bride, you mean?" asked Kagome, though her focus had wandered out onto the beauty of the surrounding trees.

"Yes," replied Akitoki, feeling his face heat further despite the chill of the air.

"She must be a lovely court lady, then," Kagome commented, turning a smile on the guard.

"S-she is certainly lovely," stuttered Akitoki. "Though as to her being a court lady…"

He trailed off, allowing her room to fill in the rest. She stared at him for a long moment as they walked, a slight frown creasing her brow. Akitoki held his breath anxiously, waiting for her to come to the logical conclusion.

"Akitoki-sama….by chance, have you…." Kagome said slowly, putting it all together. "You mean you have fallen in love with one of the servants?"

The guard almost fell over. But she was looking at him so seriously. He felt a sharp, quick stab of despair. Was he really so far outside the range of her romantic interests?

But perhaps she was just very unassuming. That was it, he told himself. He would simply have to come straight out and tell her. He came to a halt, turning a burning yet resolved look on her. She stopped as well, her head tilting quizzically.

"K-Kagome-sama," he said with the utmost gravity, and her look turned to one of concern. "I know it is terribly forward and presumptuous of me to say so, however, my feelings-"

"Oi, Kagome! I know you're there! Quit lagging and hurry the hell up!"

Both jumped at the voice booming out from just beyond a nearby line of trees. Akitoki turned a stunned look on her, and Kagome nearly flinched. Silently she cursed the hanyou for his utter lack of sense.

"Kagome-sama, that is not …the Ten-?"

"My apologies, Akitoki-sama!" Kagome cut him off hurriedly. "I really should be going. I will come to visit you later, alright? Thank you so much for the escort!"

She offered him a quick bow before dashing off, leaving the dumbfounded guard to puzzle through things on his own.

Darting beyond the tree line, Kagome ran straight into something solid and fell roughly onto her backside. She sat blinking for a moment, dazed at the sudden impact. As her eyes refocused she saw the wall of red she had crashed into looming before her.

Though it was not so much a wall as a rather irate looking sovereign glaring down at her. For a moment Kagome was tempted to draw back at the blatant ire written across his features, but she quickly came to her senses and returned the glare. He was the one yelling like some ruffian in front of one of the guards that was supposed to revere and respect him.

"Who the hell was that?" growled the hanyou lowly.

"Obviously it was one of your guards, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome returned archly.

"He wasn't the one I sent to get you!"

"Akitoki-sama swapped duties with the other guard because he wanted to see how I was doing."

The words were out of her mouth before she could stop to think them over. She winced slightly as Inuyasha's expression darkened further, realizing that that bit of information might very well get the young guard in trouble.

"He went against my direct orders, huh?" 

"Not really against, Inuyasha-sama, just-"

"I'll have him demoted," the hanyou declared darkly. 

"What? No, Inuyasha-sama! You can't do that! Akitoki-sama got me here, just as you wanted! There's really no reason to be angry!" Kagome pleaded, frustrated.

"He disobeyed me! You want me to just sit there and take it like an idiot when subjects disobey me?"

She bit her tongue, at a loss. He was right. Despite the purity of his intentions, Akitoki-sama had in a sense disobeyed the Tennō. She lowered her eyes, submitting for the moment.

"I apologize, Inuyasha-sama. But please do not punish Akitoki-sama. He was merely concerned about me."

"...Figures that you'd stick up for your new lover, huh?" Inuyasha said lowly, somehow more annoyed than ever despite her deference.

Of course he would be annoyed, he reasoned. It was disgusting, being forced to listen to the two morons coo over each other.

Well, maybe he had not been forced to listen, but with his ears he could hardly avoid overhearing. And anyone would have been pissed off, having to listen to that stammering, bashful idiot of a guard drool all over her!

"Lover?" echoed Kagome, turning uncomprehending eyes up to him.

"Don't play dumb, woman," he snapped. "I could hear you two fawning all over each other like a pair of real idiots!"

"No one was fawning, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome returned, ignoring for the moment the obvious question of exactly how long he had been listening in on them. "Akitoki-sama and I were merely talking. We became friends during the time I was in isolation."

"That's where I know that bastard from!" Inuyasha exclaimed, recalling suddenly. "He was the one who came and asked me to be able to guard you! So you two were just all over each other the entire time, then? You were supposed to be in isolation, not getting cozy with my fucking guardsmen!"

"Well, considering that I can't exactly meditate all day of every day for an entire week, I don't really see what else I was supposed to do!" Kagome returned heatedly. "You are the one, Inuyasha-sama, who threw me into that room for a week with barely an explanation!”

“It's only natural that I would talk with the few people available to me! And Akitoki-sama and I weren't 'all over each other'! It isn't like that at all! You're completely misunderstanding things!"

"The hell it isn't!" the hanyou barked back. "I ain't stupid, Kagome! That fucking idiot was about to declare intent!"

"…Declare intent?" Kagome said, her confusion muffling her ire for a moment.

"Declaring intent, stupid! Telling you he intends to… pursue you," Inuyasha spat as if the word left an unpleasant taste in his mouth.

Kagome frowned, replaying her conversation with the guardsmen over in her head. Abruptly something seemed to click. Akitoki’s extreme shyness, his constant blushing, his odd attentiveness, his sudden mention of finding a bride…

"Akitoki-sama isn't…interested in me, is he?" Kagome said wonderingly, though more to herself than to the Tennō.

"What the hell do you think I've been saying, you-!?" Inuyasha exploded. 

The hanyou cut himself off, pausing for a moment. Kagome was staring hard down at the ground now, her expression utterly bewildered. Inuyasha's scowl twisted incredulously.

"…You…really didn't know?" he said after a moment, a small portion of his anger fizzling out.

"But…Akitoki-sama couldn't possibly…" Kagome said, still struggling with the idea despite the sense it made.

"Idiot! How in the seven hells could you not notice?! He was drooling over you almost as bad as that mangy wolf does!" Inuyasha berated her, though without much of his previous ire.

"Well, you'll pardon me, Inuyasha-sama, for not being accustomed to men…pursuing me," Kagome murmured, acutely embarrassed at not having figured it out sooner. "The boys in my village tended to shy away from getting too close to me, after all."

She glared down at the ground, her cheeks warming. That was where she had seen that expression before. Kouga wore it almost all the time that he was around her, or at least some variance of it. Really she had been foolish not to notice it.

And now that she did know, she was at loss as to what to do. Akitoki and Kouga were very different people, so of course she could not handle the situation in the same manner. Akitoki was so kind, it was hard to imagine trying to tell him that she was not interested. Ah, this certainly did make things awkward. So much for having made a new friend…

"Feh. Whatever. Now you know," Inuyasha huffed, tamping down a twinge of curiosity at the mention of her life in the village as his anger all but faded out. "C'mon. We have a lot to discuss."

With one hand he reached down and hoisted her up by the back of her robes. Kagome scowled at the rough treatment, but refrained from commenting. She paused as Inuyasha finally moved out from her direct line of vision, catching sight at last of the area he had chosen for their meeting.

It was surprisingly beautiful. Hardly any place she would have expected him to choose. It was a tiny little snow covered ledge, just the slightest upslope of ground, and it overlooked a rather vast, dark pond. Water lilies and snowflakes dotted the surface of the water here and there, swaying gently. Snow-dusted trees ringed the small clearing and pond as far as her eyes could see.

A couple of layers of silk cloth had been laid out on the top of the ledge for them to sit on. An ornate and over-sized rice paper parasol had been set up on the ground beside the cloths, keeping them clear of snow.

Kagome's eyes slid back to the hanyou beside her curiously. Somehow she could not avoid the feeling that he had picked the spot specially for her benefit. He caught her look and returned it with a scowl.

"What? Got a problem? You're the one who insisted on doing this somewhere other than my chambers," he said defensively, a faint blush dusting the ridges of his cheeks.

"No problems, Inuyasha-sama. It's a lovely spot," Kagome responded, a slight smile dancing at the corners of her lips.

His obvious guardedness when she had done so little to warrant it all but confirmed her suspicions. She felt a pleased little flutter dart through her stomach at the thought.

"Feh," Inuyasha huffed, brushing past her up the slope to flop down rather gracelessly onto the cloths.

Kagome stifled a chuckle and followed his lead. She knelt down onto the cloths, shivering slightly at the feeling of the frozen ground just beneath the thin layers. The miko took a moment to enjoy the view of the surroundings that their position on the ledge afforded before turning to the Tennō.

"How did the Council meeting go?" she asked, starting off with the thing foremost on her mind.

The hanyou snorted, his gaze out on the gently swaying waters of the pond. He shook his head, the twist to his lips taking on a quality of disbelief.

"Fucking strangest meeting I've ever been to," he replied. "They were quiet. The whole damn lot of them, the whole damn time. Just….listening."

"…Isn't that what they're supposed to do, Inuyasha-sama?" Kagome ventured.

"That bunch of wrinkled old bastards? Not a chance in the seven hells," Inuyasha snorted. "They're always trying to pull something. Using their power to press me into delegating funds to grow their personal armies, to expand their properties, to give them more control of incoming and outgoing trade, to give them more authority over the commoners. It fucking never ends with them!"

"But not this time?" Kagome supplied.

"Yeah. Not this time. All of them just sat there with these idiotic looks on their faces, like the kami might strike them down the second they opened their big mouths."

"Ah…Well, what did you tell them while you had their attention, then?"

"Told 'em that I was transferring all of the power of an official court spiritualist to you, and that you'd be working directly for me from now on. Even then the bastards barely flinched."

Kagome stilled, her eyes widening. It was not as if she had not already known this to some extent, but he said it so very casually. It was disconcerting.

"Don't you think this is a little much to give me, Inuyasha-sama? I mean, this and placing me up on the dais alongside Kikyou-sama…" she trailed off uneasily.

"You're the one who fought for it, Kagome. You gonna back down now that you got it?" the hanyou returned challengingly.

"No, Inuyasha-sama, of course not. I'm glad for it, really. It's just…isn't it a lot all at once? It's no small leap to go from being a commoner among nobles to a court spiritualist in direct service of the Tennō-sama," Kagome said softly.

"Like I said, you fought for it. That's something I have to respect. So how about you just shut up and be grateful for once?" Inuyasha huffed.

Kagome went silent, at a loss as to how to respond. This was what she had hoped for. He was willing to trust her with this. No small amount of trust, either. And with the vague idea she had of his history with people, it was made all the more meaningful. Kagome's heart warmed at the thought, and she bowed her head to hide a soft expression that she knew would most likely have earned her Inuyasha's ridicule.

"Thank you, Inuyasha-sama. I will do my best," was all that she could manage, soft and sincere.

"Feh. I know already," the hanyou returned, his tone slightly less gruff than usual. "So?"

"….So what, Inuyasha-sama?" 

"So, you didn't call me out here and ask about the Council meeting just for the hell of, did you?" Inuyasha said. "I'm assuming you actually have something to say about it all. So spit it out."

"Ah, right," Kagome said, forcing her mind back onto the business at hand. "Well, after what you just told me….Hmm. I can't claim to know much about the workings of the Council besides the little that Kaede-sama told me, but it seems to me that now would be a good time to test the waters."

"Test the waters?" Inuyasha echoed, arching a brow.

"I mean….how to put it?" Kagome muttered, chewing at her lower lip in thought. "To see how much ground we have gained, I guess. To see how far they're willing to bend to you now. You've said before that they're uncooperative. I guess I want to be able to judge how well it's all come out, and it seems that the Council might be the best gauge for it."

"….Yeah," answered Inuyasha after a moment of consideration.

"Then, do you have any idea of what we might do exactly to test them? Though I suppose their having accepted my official appointment to the position of spiritualist is a solid place to start from," Kagome mused thoughtfully.

"I already know just what to do," the hanyou said lowly, dark satisfaction bubbling just beneath the words as his scowl curled up wickedly at the corners. "I'll route those damn bastards, the same way they've been routing me since my fucking ascension."

"Route?" Kagome asked.

"Yeah, route. To push something through using force," he said, though the fiendish gleam in his golden eyes said clearly that his mind was still occupied with the thought of finally getting the better of the Council.

"What sorts of things do they 'push through'?" Kagome asked.

Inuyasha shot her a pointed look at the further interruption of his vengeful musings. Kagome frowned in return and leveled a stern look at him, refusing to apologize for her lack of knowledge.

"They push for funding to fit their own agendas, for the allowance of increases in the sizes of their personal armies, for more control over trade routes, for more control in the issuing of laws and decrees," the hanyou ticked off each thing with a clawed finger. "All that shit.”

“It's how they chip away at the Tennō's power. They take all the authority out of the position and I become just a figurehead, easy to off."

"And they've been working at this since your ascension a year ago?" Kagome reflected. "How much have they been able to take from you?"

"A fucking chunk," the hanyou admitted bitterly. "The threat of an army that might or might not listen to me and a few half-assed clans backing me hardly slows those assholes down one damn bit."

"Then they're just biding their time," Kagome said softly, speaking aloud mostly to herself as she puzzled things out. "Stealing power from you bit by bit as their clans recover from the throne war. That way you'll be easy to depose once one of the clans regain enough strength to oppose your supporters with any certainty.”

“Then they'll take the throne without much to block them, already in possession of the authority of the Tennō. They're just waiting for it…"

She trailed off, a cold creeping over her that had nothing to do with the chill in the air. Somehow their position always seemed to be a bit worse than she had thought. She wondered if even her vision could be more than a slight deterrent against such a determined force.

Inuyasha watched the progression of her thoughts across her face from the corner of his eye. She was really too easy to read, slight horror settling over her features as she came to the logical conclusion. It was an unpleasant thing to see on her face.

"I'll push through a decree to cut the size of their personal armies, then," the hanyou said, gratified to see the expression disappear as her eyes shifted towards him.

"What?"

"For the test, wench," Inuyasha continued. "I'll force them each to cut the number of personal soldiers they’re allowed to keep."

Kagome frowned, considering this for a long moment. It would certainly be a test of his influence, but….

"Perhaps you should start with something smaller, Inuyasha-sama," she suggested at length.

"A smaller cut in the numbers?"

"No, just…it seems to me that having military power taken from them is the thing they'd struggle hardest against," she explained. "Even if they were inclined to obey you right now, I don't think they'd be able to accept something so drastic right away."

"Feh. No more than the bastards deserve," Inuyasha huffed, unwilling to give up on the idea of the old men's faces as he told them he would be taking their soldiers from them.

Now that would be something worth going to a Council meeting for. Inuyasha chuckled darkly to himself.

"I know you're eager to get back at them," Kagome sighed, catching the vindictive glint in his eyes once more. "But they took power from you in small bits, right? I think we should do the same, to avoid causing any trouble if possible."

"You mean the way you 'avoided trouble' with your vision scheme," Inuyasha sniped, a little bitter at having his plan ruined. "What should we do then?"

Kagome frowned at the small slight, but chose to ignore it. She took a moment to sort through various ideas, though she already half-knew what it was that she wanted to do.

"Well," she hesitated, realizing there was no real way to say it without coming off as self-serving. "I do have one idea that I think would be suitable. It's certainly minor enough, though it would still prove useful as a small test of power…"

"Spit it out already, Kagome."

"I…want to send funds to the villages in my area that were destroyed by the youkai attacks," Kagome said hurriedly. "It doesn't have to be my village! But a lot of the other villages were hit hard and…"

"What're you getting all worked up about, wench?" the hanyou asked, watching her as she fidgeted uncomfortably.

"I…don't want you to think I have an agenda," Kagome said softly, glancing over at him. "Like the members of the Council, I mean. It's really not like that. I just want-"

"Want to help those villages of yours," Inuyasha cut in, finishing for her. "I already know that. You've been yapping about it since day one."

"I just don't want you to think I'm acting like them again," Kagome admitted, frowning.

It did seem as if she had gained his trust, but it was so new it was rather precarious. If he suspected her of acting like a deceitful courtier again, she would undoubtedly lose the trust she had worked so hard to gain from him.

"Idiot. I gave you a seat on the dais, didn't I?" the hanyou said gruffly. "I mean, I get it now. You and them are like two different breeds."

"But…"

"The vision plot surprised me," Inuyasha interrupted. "I didn't expect that kinda thing from you. But I get it now. You didn't want the power for yourself. You didn't hurt anyone.”

“You're…different, Kagome. I won't make the mistake of lumping you in with them again. So quit your whining already."

It was true. Yesterday's meeting had made him realize clearly enough that he could not dismiss her as just some human, or just some courtier, or even just some woman. He had sensed from early on that Kagome was some kind of oddity, but the previous day's meeting had solidified it for him.

"Ah…Alright, then," Kagome said, her heart fluttering oddly in her chest.

She pressed a hand to it, hoping it would calm down a little. Really, she could not be letting herself get all worked up every time she gained the smallest bit of ground with the Tennō. It was unbefitting of the role she was now supposed to play.

"Now that we've got that crap out of the way," said Inuyasha, recalling her attention and effectively stopping the fluttering. "Did you have specific villages in mind?"

"The ones that were hit by the youkai swarm," Kagome answered. "There were at least four in the area around my village that were almost entirely demolished."

"And do you have an idea of how much they'll need?"

"Rather than sending funds, Inuyasha-sama, I thought it might be more appropriate to send supplies," Kagome said. "You know, food, water, materials for rebuilding houses, maybe seeds to plant a new crop when spring comes around.”

“We don't do much in the way of buying and selling in the villages, you see. Merchants rarely ever pass our way. They know we don't have much in the way of currency, let alone surplus of anything to trade."

The hanyou eyed her for a long moment, considering this. The tan had still not faded entirely from her skin despite the amount of time she had spent in the court, and her eyes seemed to drift far off for a moment. It was not hard to tell that she was thinking of her own little village, and the life she had led there.

Curiosity prodded annoyingly at him once more. What had her life been like there? What had she been like then?

But Inuyasha could not bring himself to ask her any of these things. So he merely gazed at her in silence for a time, as if he might decipher answers from the line of her profile.

After a bit Kagome managed to rouse herself from her musings on the condition of her village and its inhabitants, not having realized she had even fallen into it. She turned a sheepish smile on the Tennō beside her, only to find his gaze trained on her intently.

He turned away quickly, scowling hard out at the waters before them. Kagome frowned quizzically.

"I'll tell the Council we're sending supplies to them and see how it goes," he stated gruffly, red tingeing the ridges of his cheeks. "Anything else?"

"Well, there was something," said Kagome, pressing her hand against the folded piece of parchment in her robes. "But I think I need a bit more time to talk to a few people before I present it to you. Do you mind if we meet again tomorrow?"

"We'd have to anyway," Inuyasha replied. "So I can tell you how the Council reacts. I'm gonna try out the proposition on 'em at today's meeting."

"Alright. This same time tomorrow, then?" Kagome asked, quietly flattered that his first instinct was now to discuss court happenings with her.

"Mmm," the hanyou grunted in agreement.

"Will you go to prepare for the Council meeting now?" asked Kagome, rising to stand.

"I'll go to eat breakfast now," scoffed the hanyou. "I'm hungry as all hell, and those geezers don't deserve my 'preparation'."

Kagome arched her brows wryly at him, making a mental note to start etiquette training with him tomorrow as well. It was high time he learned to carry himself in the manner of a ruler. Or at least in the manner of a civilized, intelligent being.

"I will take my leave for the day then, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome said, bowing. "I have a lot of ground to cover before we next meet."

Inuyasha grunted his assent, watching as she turned and started down the small incline. A thought occurred to him suddenly, and he was on his feet before he even realized it.

"Oi, wench!"

Kagome paused, turning back to look at the hanyou.

"Yes?"

"Where are you going?"

Kagome frowned, confused. 

"I already told you, Inuyasha-sama, I'm going to prepare for tomorrow's meeting-"

"Not that!" he cut her off. "Where are you going? What place?"

"The Tachibana residence," huffed Kagome, uncertain as to the point of the question.

"Oh. Fine, then. Get going," Inuyasha said dismissively, plopping back down and flapping a shooing hand at her.

"Inuyasha-sama-" Kagome said, scowling darkly.

"You said you had a bunch of shit to get done before tomorrow, so get to it," Inuyasha interrupted her again, unwilling to answer the question he knew would follow.

Kagome's jaw clamped shut on an angry retort, her teeth grinding in a decidedly unladylike manner. Must he always be so high-handed with her? With a huff she turned and stomped lightly away, wondering why she had ever been pleased by anything that might come from such a rude man.

Inuyasha watched her go, unrepentant. He had a right to know where she was going to be. And he most certainly had a right to know if she was going to be traipsing around with that idiotic, lovesick fool of a guardsman. It was his right as her sovereign, damn it, and she had no reason to be all huffy about it.

Inuyasha nodded to himself, secure in his own reasoning.

* * *

In a slight pique Kagome made her way quickly over the snowy paths to the Tachibana residence. She was allowed entrance without question and shown to a sitting room to await Sango's return.

The noblewoman was not long in coming, though she was rather rumpled and wearing her taiji-ya uniform when she arrived. She protested at attending to a guest in such a state and would have gone to bathe had Kagome not assured her firmly that she did not mind in the least.

Sango had tea and breakfast brought for the both of them to the sitting room, informing Kagome that she had been out with her cousin doing a bit of weapons training. She feared she was getting rusty, she said, since it had been such a long time since her last real field mission.

They chatted idly as they ate. When they had finished and servants had cleared the dishes, Sango finally got around to asking about the reason behind Kagome's visit. The miko promptly pulled from her robes the notes she had made, laying them out before the taiji-ya on the table.

"I know there are a good deal of other things that I still need to discuss with you and Miroku-sama, Sango-sama, but for right now I am afraid that this has to take priority," said Kagome, alluding lightly to both the rumor scandal and her own vision ploy.

Sango was silent for a moment, looking over the list Kagome had handed her. Kagome flushed slightly when the older woman had to squint and bring the parchment closer to her face, wishing she had worked harder at the writing lessons Kaede-sama had given her. At last the noblewoman set the list down, turning her attention back to the girl.

"You are trying to get an idea of the stances of the clans here in court?" she concluded.

Kagome nodded.

"I want to know who can be counted on to support the Tennō-sama and who…" she trailed off, unable to think of any tactful way to finish the sentence.

"You mean, who the Tennō-sama needs to keep a closer eye on," Sango supplied.

Kagome nodded once more, waiting for her to continue.

"Well, in regards to the other matter we need to discuss, I suppose it would be better to wait until the houshi returns," Sango said thoughtfully. "Right now he is out of the court doing a small bit of field work. And I will certainly give you any help I can, Kagome-chan, but I can not claim to be privy to all of the goings on of the court. It is hard to see the forest for the trees, after all."

"Whatever help you can give me will be more than enough, Sango-sama," Kagome assured her gratefully. "I think I have the most basic of concepts of what is going on, but I don't have the leisure of time to form a fuller picture. I thought you could help me there, since you've been raised here and I know I can trust you to give me the straightest truth."

Sango smiled, pleased at this show of faith from her friend. Kagome finally seemed to be finding her balance here in the court and gaining a bit of confidence. She turned her eyes back down to the parchments spread out across the table, scanning them critically. Most of the major clans seemed to be accounted for, along with Kagome's observations of them…

"The Minamoto," Sango put in, tapping the kanji lightly with one finger. "I know a bit about them. They are highly anti-youkai in sentiment. They have been for generations."

"Anti-youkai?" Kagome echoed questioningly, her brows lifting.

"Yes. They aim to keep any blood that is not strictly human away from the throne," the taiji-ya replied. "They believe youkai blood is…impure, if you will."

Kagome frowned, the concept striking her as odd.

"They think youkai blood is impure? But that does not make any sense. Youkai were created by the kami at the same time as humans, from the same elements in nature. They serve as a counterbalance to humans. How could that be impure?"

"They read the creation story a bit differently than most," Sango explained, shaking her head. "If you have ever read a transcription of the story itself, the writing concerning the creation of humans and youkai is…slightly ambiguous, I suppose.”

“It can be read as most read it, as human and youkai having been created in a counterbalance and complement to one another. However, it can also be twisted a bit to be read to say that youkai were created as the darkness to balance out the light of humanity."

"That…how could that be?" Kagome said slowly, her brow furrowing in consternation. "It might make sense if all youkai were purely evil or all humans were purely good. But…"

Sango shook her head dismissively, one hand flapping in a gesture of decided incomprehension.

"People will believe what they wish to, Kagome-chan, regardless of logic or sense. The Minamoto have it set in their minds that youkai are impure. It would take a great deal to dissuade them of that notion at this point."

"But some of the Minamoto women were associating with the Taira women at the outing," Kagome pointed out.

"'The enemy of my enemy'..." Sango mused thoughtfully, and then, at the miko's blank look, "I mean, neither the Taira nor the Minamoto clan are in favor of our current Tennō-sama. Considering this, they might for a time set aside their animosity in order to work against his Majesty."

"You think so?" Kagome asked. Absently she began to worry her lower lip with her teeth, considering this.

If the Minamoto and the Taira truly were willing to set aside their differences in order to work against Inuyasha, that meant that two of the major clans in the court were already set solidly against him. That left the Tachibana and the Fujiwara clans to support him.

However, the Tachibana already seemed to have their hands full dealing with the youkai stirring up trouble outside of the court, and the Fujiwara were so thoroughly decimated that they likely had little left to offer.

That left Inuyasha at quite a disadvantage, Kagome reflected darkly. Still, there had to be somewhere to look for support….

"What about the minor clans, Sango-sama?" Kagome voiced at last, raising her eyes to meet her friend's expectant gaze. "What can you tell me about them?"

Sango frowned thoughtfully for a moment before rising. She slid open the shoji screen that connected the room to the hall, calling out for a servant. One appeared promptly and Sango asked her to fetch a brush and inkstone. The servant nodded and disappeared down the hall to obey.

She returned quickly, handing the implements off to the noblewoman with a bow before setting off again. The taiji-ya resumed her seat at the low table, motioning for Kagome to come sit beside her.

The miko complied, watching as the noblewoman began to sketch out row after row of elegantly flowing Kanji alongside her own messy scrawl. Absently she admired the woman's skill as she watched the words sweeping across on the page.

"There are literally hundreds of minor clans within the court," Sango spoke as she worked, pausing every now and then to dip her brush back into the inkwell. "I cannot claim to know all of them, or even to have in depth knowledge of most of them.”

“However, the minor clans do tend to group rather conveniently for our purposes beneath the major clans. They rely on us for support and power, you see, and we, in turn, rely on them for the same. Minor clans can also aspire to gain more influence in the court by allying themselves with the proper major clans, the ones in a position to gain favor with the Tennō-sama.”

“Beneath the Minamoto clan, as you might imagine, are minor clans composed mostly of humans. From what I can recall, the Mononobe, Nakatomi, Soga, Kusakabe, and Hojo clans associate most closely with them."

Kagome nodded at this, though she was surprised to learn that Akitoki's clan was associated with the Minamoto. He had always sounded so very eager to serve the Tennō as one of his soldiers. Perhaps, though, he was not of a mind with the rest of his clan. The miko made a mental note to talk to him about this when they next met.

"Next are the Taira clan," Sango continued, her brush moving rhythmically over the page. "As we have established, their clan is composed mostly of full youkai. They have little tolerance for mixed breeds or humans. Thus the minor clans that they allow to associate with them are composed mostly of youkai, as well.”

“Chief among the minor clans that support the Taira are the Ki, Abe, Hashiji, and Ō clans. As far as I know, that is. While the Taira are certainly the most vocal of the clans opposing his Majesty, they are remarkably good at keeping secret those they associate with. Very few outside the clan are privy to any knowledge of their movements at any given time."

"Then the Taira clan might have a number of other clans at their disposal that no one else is aware of?" Kagome asked. Sango nodded.

"They would be the ones to keep the closest eye on," the taiji-ya said, her expression darkening slightly. "It is hard to be certain, but I think they have been able to recover most quickly from the throne war."

Kagome sighed, having vaguely guessed at this much already. She would need to work on finding some insight into the Taira, some way to gain access to their inner workings. The only problem with that, she lamented silently, was that she had absolutely no clue how to go about doing it.

Sango, reading the gloomy turn of her thoughts across her face, offered up a tentative smile to her friend.

"How about we take a break for a bit?" she suggested, setting her brush down atop the inkstone. "It is a lot to take in all at once, and the only clans left to go over are the ones that I know to be in support of his Majesty."

Kagome mirrored her friend's smile with a small one of her own, grateful for the offer. Her head was beginning to feel a bit heavy with names and associations and planning.

"Just for a little while," she assented. "We can return in a bit to finish up."

"Good," Sango said, bringing her hands together decisively. "And I know just where we can go to relax. To the bath house!"

Kagome chuckled, her mood lightening instantly at the noblewoman's enthusiasm.

"That's been in the back of your mind this entire time, hasn't it, Sango-sama?" Kagome accused lightly.

Sango gave an airy little shrug, her lips quirking upwards a bit guiltily. "I was out practicing for hours before I came here. I must smell badly enough to offend the kami by now."

This had Kagome laughing outright, her hand coming up to cover her mouth as she shook with mirth. Sango's smile widened, her goal accomplished. Kagome continued to try to take quite a lot of work upon her shoulders, and the noblewoman was glad to be able to ease her worries even just temporarily. She wanted to be able to support her friend.

"If you are done laughing at me, then let us go," Sango suggested. Kagome left off laughing, turning mirth-bright eyes on her.

"Yes, of course…Thank you, Sango-sama."

* * *

Despite Kagome's best intentions, the two did not return to their work that night. They spent an exorbitant amount of time in the baths, laughing and chatting the time away as they cleansed themselves.

Afterwards Sango insisted that they go for a walk, as it had once again begun to snow and she wished to use her new parasol. Kagome agreed easily enough, both happy to be in the taiji-ya's company and reluctant to return to their earlier task.

She also realized that the older woman was trying her best to help ease her mind for a bit. She was touched by the effort.

Thus they whiled away the remainder of the day and a portion of the night strolling the pathways of the court. By the time they were finished the snow was piled nearly ankle-deep and showed no signs of stopping that night. Kagome parted warmly from Sango at the Tachibana residence, heading back to the Dairi and her own room in Kikyou's residence.

As she lay down to sleep, a fleeting glance out her window reminded her that the new moon was only a few nights away. Kagome fell asleep smiling.

* * *

A ray of morning sunlight slanting across her closed lids roused Kagome the next morning. She stirred groggily, recalling vaguely in her morning haze that she had to meet with Inuyasha.

She forced herself up out of bed and summoned a servant to aid her in dressing. Eating a quick breakfast as the woman worked on her, Kagome made a mental list of all the things she needed to go over with the hanyou. She tucked her notes into the front of her robes, as well, to show to him.

After thanking the servant woman she set off toward the Jijūden, trudging through the thick blanket of snow that coated the pathway. She hugged the thick karaginu draped over her miko robes closer to herself, grateful to the serving woman for having insisted she wear it. Scattered flakes still drifted haphazardly down from the grey morning sky and it was freezing out.

She made her way quickly through the gardens, the Shishinden, and over across the water walkway. A guard stopped her before she could enter Inuyasha's chambers in the Jijūden.

"His Majesty requested that I send you back to his private gardens," he explained with a bow. "The Tennō-sama informed me that you might find his Majesty in the same place as yesterday morning."

"Oh," Kagome said, a pleased grin turning up her lips. "Thank you. I will go find his Majesty there."

She returned his bow and started off around the edge of the building, her steps light as she went. It was rather cold to be meeting outside, but she had really liked the spot he had picked for them yesterday.

She entered the gardens and started in past the trees. Vaguely she recalled the path she had taken the day before, finding it again after several moments of searching. It led her straight back to that same small incline, a familiar red-clad figure gazing out at the icy waters of the large pond from the top.

"Inuyasha-sama!" she called, a grin stretching her face as he turned to look at her. "Good morning!"

He merely raised a dark, heavy brow in response to her cheer as she made her way up the slope, taking her place beside him beneath the large parasol. The blanket he had had set out for them to sit on was much thicker this time, she noted gratefully.

"I hope I did not keep you waiting long," she said, reaching into her robes to pull out the folded parchment. "You did not send a guard to fetch me this time."

"Didn't need to give the bastard any more opportunities," the hanyou muttered, so lowly she barely heard him.

"What?" she asked, looking up.

"Nothin'," he returned quickly, and then pointed at the papers in her hand. "What're those?"

"My notes," Kagome said, holding them up a bit sheepishly. "I have been compiling them from what I have been able to see here so far. Sango-sama helped me, too. They're not very comprehensive, though…"

Inuyasha plucked the parchment from her hands, unfolding it to scan through quickly. Kagome watched his eyes dart over the pages, absently biting her lip. She hoped he would approve of her efforts.

"This…you got all this in the time you've been here?" Inuyasha voiced at length, his eyes darting once more over the combination of what was obviously Kagome's sloppy kanji intermixed with someone else's neat script.

He looked almost impressed, the usual surly set of his features softening around the edges. Kagome preened inwardly, her eyes brightening as she observed him.

"Like I said, Sango-sama helped me. I did not know almost anything about the workings of the minor clans," she offered modestly, feeling rather giddy.

"This is good, Kagome," he offered at length, raising his eyes to meet hers.

He jerked back slightly at the look on her face, taken off guard. She looked so…happy, cheeks pink and grey eyes warm as they rested on him. He felt his own cheeks heat to match and turned hastily away with a cough.

"W-What about the Tachibana and the Fujiwara?" he stuttered, waving the pages at her in his agitation.

"I have to go back and meet with Sango-sama again before I can say anything for certain," Kagome replied. "But I believe I would be safe in saying that you have the support of those clans."

The hanyou's disconcertion dissipated as he considered this, nodding slowly.

"Yeah. The old men in the Council from those clans don't try to pull too much crap. Still obnoxious as hell, though."

Kagome raised her brows at him, her lips pursing in slight disapproval.

"I hardly think you're in a position to be complaining about your supporters, Inuyasha-sama," she chastised lightly.

He huffed unrepentantly, but something in his expression sobered. Kagome bit her lip, berating herself for having killed the pleasant mood so quickly.

"We're still at a loss," the hanyou said at last, his look becoming darkly contemplative. "The Fujiwara've got almost nothing left to offer. And the Tachibana ain't exactly at the height of their power anymore, either."

"…No, they're not," Kagome assented softly, her eyes falling to the blanket beneath them. "But…I mean, it's something, isn't it? We're figuring out where we stand, at least…"

She trailed off weakly, risking a glance up at him from beneath her lashes. His expression was distant, though, and she sighed. Absently she fiddled with her the sleeves of her karaginu, casting about in her mind for something to bring him back to the conversation.

"Sango-sama thinks the Taira clan is our biggest threat," she settled on at last, recalling the things she had reminded herself to tell him earlier. "I would have to agree. That Taira Kagura woman has tried to cause trouble every time I have seen her. And Sango-sama says that she believes they are recovering themselves the fastest."

"The Taira clan…?" the hanyou echoed, dragging his attention forcefully back into the present. "…Yeah. Makes sense. The bastards made their feelings about my 'dirty blood' pretty damn clear from the moment I was announced successor. They don't push for too much in the Council, though. Mostly just work at blocking anything I try to do."

Kagome looked up at him, frowning as she mulled over this new snippet of information. Something never quite seemed to add up about the Taira clan, as if she were missing some critical piece…

"I will work at getting an in with the Taira clan, somehow," Kagome murmured, as much to herself as to Inuyasha. "We need a direct link to them. We need to know what they are up to…."

She trailed off thoughtfully, and the hanyou observed as her brow furrowed in concentration and her gaze turned inward. She looked troubled, frustrated as she attempted to work through the problem all on her own.

He was struck by the urge to offer her something. Anything. With possibly the exception of his mother, no one had ever worked so hard for him. Given so much to help him. And all that Kagome got for her trouble was more trouble. Every odd was stacked against him and she stuck with him anyway.

Kagome deserved better, fool girl that she was. He wanted to give her something.

"I pushed through for the supplies in the Council," he blurted, and her eyes flew up to meet his as she was torn from her thoughts.

"Huh?" she returned inelegantly.

"The supplies for those little villages of yours," he returned. "I told the Council yesterday that I was going to send them supplies from the capital so that they could start rebuilding. The old men didn't put up much of a fight over it."

Kagome's mouth slipped open a little bit. 

"Really?"

Inuyasha nodded, something lifting in his chest at the dawning look of hope in her face.

"Yeah. There're already some workers out fixing up the Taira clan branch house that got destroyed, so I sent word to them to head towards the villages to do a survey of the area. Word should come back from them of what they'll require to make repairs in a few weeks, and then I'll send out whatever they need."

Kagome was silent for a long stretch, merely staring at him. And then her face crumpled a bit, a suspicious sheen gathering along the fringe of her dark lashes. Inuyasha flinched, panic spiking through him.

"O-Oi-!"

"Thank you," Kagome cut across his protests, her voice cracking. "Thank you, Inuyasha-sama. I know Miroku-sama told me it wasn't my fault, but I've felt so guilty. Thank you."

"G-Guilty?" the hanyou echoed, put off by her reaction.

She nodded, a breathless little laugh escaping her. "T-the villages…it was my aura that drew the rampaging youkai to the area. It was my fault they got destroyed in the first place."

"Kagome…" he said, his expression sinking into a frown. She had been carrying that with her all this time, too?

"But it's alright now. You fixed it," Kagome pressed on, a few tears escaping her despite how she fought them back. The whole of her guilt and shame and relief and gratitude seemed to be rushing to the forefront in a confusing torrent.

Something inside the hanyou constricted at the sight of her, small and vulnerable like a child, and he scooted tentatively towards her across the blanket. Slowly, ever so slowly, he placed a clawed hand on the top of her head, giving her an awkward pat. He could vaguely recall his mother doing the same to comfort him when he was small.

She peeked up at him, sniffling. A wobbly smile crept over her features. His heart lurched uncomfortably.

"Thank you," she said softly.

"Feh. You said that already," Inuyasha muttered, flushing.

Kagome chuckled, swiping at her eyes. 

"So I did. I meant it, though."

"You mean everything you say," Inuyasha scoffed, rolling his eyes. "That's what makes you so weird."

She laughed again, the sound lighter this time. 

"I feel like I should take offense at that."

Inuyasha shrugged, a smirk tilting up one corner of his mouth. There, he'd taken care of that.

"This is good, though, isn't it?" she said hopefully after a beat, slowly recollecting herself. "That the Council would bow to you so easily must be a good sign, right?"

Inuyasha nodded. "Seems that way."

"You should keep at it, then," Kagome suggested eagerly. "Try for something else at the next Council meeting. Something bigger."

He considered this for a minute, eyes narrowing in thought.

"I could restrict residence visits. Limit the amount of time they're allowed to spend off at their outside residences," he put in, looking to her.

"That's perfect!" Kagome enthused, beaming up at him. "It's still relatively small and unobtrusive, but it serves as a way to keep them close and monitor them when they do leave."

He swelled a bit at the praise from Kagome, sitting up straighter. "Yeah. Exactly."

"Good," she said approvingly, nodding in agreement. "You'll do that at the next Council meeting and then you can tell me how it goes. Though, I do wish there were some way to get a fuller idea of how things are going over since my vision. I'm guessing the Council is a rather small number of people to estimate the entire court's opinion from?"

"Yeah," Inuyasha agreed. "There ain't that many old men on the Council, however much noise they're able to make. And it's mostly only made up of members from the major clans."

"Maybe I will go visit Sango-sama again, then," Kagome mused. "She might be able to help me come up with something."

She turned her gaze up to meet his, intending to ask to be dismissed that she might get back to work. The words froze on the tip of her tongue, though, when she found golden eyes much closer to her own than she had anticipated. There was a slight weight on her head, as well. His hand, she realized dazedly.

They were close enough for their frosted breath to intermingle in the cold air. Kagome felt a hot flush sweep through her from head to toe, but she could not seem to bring herself to move. Her conscious mind seemed to shut down entirely. She was caught, a moth to a flame.

Inuyasha, for his part, had merely been leaning over to swipe at a dragonfly that had been hovering annoyingly close to her head. She caught him off guard, turning her face up towards his so suddenly.

He was struck dumb by the mercurial grey eyes so close to his own, her features more impossibly delicate up close than he could have imagined. He noticed suddenly the softness of her hair beneath the hand he had neglected to remove. She…smelled nice….

A loud squawking abruptly rent the still air and the two figures jerked apart. Kagome blinked in consternation at the hanyou for a long moment, feeling as if she were emerging out of some sort of strange haze. Her heart beat a frantic tattoo in the cage of her chest, and her face burned hot against the cold air of the morning.

She scrambled up suddenly, bowing jerkily to the Tennō.

"I-If you'll excuse me, Inuyasha-sama, I h-have a few things that I need to attend to," she managed to get out.

"Y-Yeah, go," Inuyasha returned, at a loss. What the hell had just happened?

Kagome bobbed another awkward bow and, without another word, turned and nearly fled toward the Tachibana clan residence.

* * *

By the time she reached the front gate of the residence Kagome had managed to calm herself a bit. She paused there, taking in a deep lungful of biting air. It sobered her, and at last she could feel her blush beginning to fade.

In all her fifteen years of life she had never experienced anything quite like that. Like being caught inexorably up in some force she could hardly comprehend. She had thought her heart was trying to work its way out through her throat, the way it was pounding. And all over a simple look….

She shook her head forcefully, fighting back another flush that threatened to warm her face. Whatever that was, it had been a fluke. Pure chance and oddity. And she certainly did not have time to be entertaining such thoughts when there was so much else to be done.

Resolving firmly not to think about it anymore, the miko stepped through the front gates and into the residence. She walked in through the main entryway, entering one of the many hallways. A small group of servants was gathered a ways down the hall and she turned towards them. They bowed deferentially at her approach.

"Do you happen to know where Sango-sama is?" she asked. "I would like to speak with her, if possible."

"Our Ladyship has gone beyond the Outer Wall to practice," replied one of the men. "I can take you to her, if you wish, Miko-sama."

"Is she with anyone? I would not want to interrupt," Kagome said, though it was a bit of a half-truth. She did not want to interrupt, but she also could not speak with Sango about the matters she wished to in the presence of an outsider.

"I believe the houshi Shingon Miroku-sama is accompanying her," put in a servant woman.

"Oh, he has returned?" Kagome said, her face lighting at the news. "Then, if one of you would not mind…"

The man who had first spoken nodded. 

"I will accompany you, Miko-sama."

He bowed once more before gesturing for her to follow him. He led her back out of the residence, winding around the outer wall of the premises. A few twists and turns among various residences brought them to the Inner Wall, which they passed through without comment from the guard.

The area between the Outer and Inner Wall turned out to be more densely populated than the miko had expected. Courtiers, merchants, servants, and guardsmen milled about everywhere in the snow, a flurry of life and activity.

Several courtiers stopped in the midst of their business at the sight of the miko as she went, bowing to varying degrees in acknowledgment of her. Kagome returned these gestures with a nod of her own, feeling vaguely self-conscious at the attention. Still she straightened her shoulders and schooled her features into a look of impassive dignity, unconsciously mimicking the look Kikyou wore at all times.

They reached the Outer Wall and were allowed passage by the gate guards, stepping out into the forest that surrounded the Northern Entrance of the Heian-kyō. The serving man led her a bit of the way into the trees before halting, gesturing for her to continue forward with a bow.

There were three serving women standing there amidst the trees, and they dipped quick bows to her as Kagome passed. Chaperones, she realized, to make certain there was no seeming of impropriety in the taiji-ya being out alone in the woods with the houshi. With a wry twist to her lips, Kagome wondered why that notion had never crossed her mind before the scandal with Kouga.

There was a sudden yell from the trees just beyond her and she jumped, her heart leaping in surprise. She pressed a hand to it, rushing forward between the trees. Berating herself for not having thought to bring her bow, she prayed that her friends were alright-

Only to skid to a halt at the sight that greeted her. It was merely Miroku and Sango in the wide clearing, locked together in combat as the noblewoman pressed an attack with her wakizashi. He deflected her strike with his shakujou, the rings clanging as he caught the blow with the sturdy shaft of the staff.

Sango pushed her assault, her features tightening as threw her weight behind her blade in a bid to overpower him. Miroku seemed to bend under the weight of her force, one foot sliding back as she heaved forward. A moment later, though, Sango pressed too far forward, and the houshi quickly turned his backward feint up and under to throw the off-balance taiji-ya back.

Sango stumbled for a moment, but then pivoted on her heel and used her momentum to jump back to a safe distance. She faced the houshi again, her wakizashi poised as she circled him intently for an opening.

Kagome was frozen where she stood, awed at what was playing out before her. Oddly enough it was not the impressive display of skill that most caught her attention. While they were truly something to behold in their obvious prowess with their respective weapons, it was the expressions on both faces that Kagome was nearly entranced by.

They both looked so…happy. Perhaps that was too mild a word for the glow that lit both the face of the noblewoman and the man, but it somehow seemed both simple and complex enough to fit.

They were focused entirely on one another as they struck and parried and duck and wove in a dance so intricate that it might have come down from the kami themselves. Only the two of them seemed to exist in the whole world, and it seemed that was more than enough for the both.

It was beautiful. And somehow…intimate, she reflected. She felt guilty, as if she had stumbled in upon something very private. She took a step back, thinking to escape before she was noticed.

Miroku, however, caught sight of her. He looked dismayed for a moment, but quickly covered it over with a too-wide welcoming grin. Sango, catching the direction of his gaze, turned as well. A look of disappointment flashed across her features before she could hide it, and Kagome felt another twinge of guilt.

"I-I am sorry to interrupt," she called meekly.

"Not at all, Kagome-chan. It is good to see you after such a long time," Miroku greeted her warmly, coming over to embrace her.

She allowed the embrace warily, glad when he did not attempt anything. Sango seemed to have composed herself by the time they parted, sheathing her wakizashi smoothly and coming over to greet the younger girl with a smile.

"Kagome-chan, what are you doing out here? Houshi-sama and I were just training a bit. He returned this morning from his errand," she explained.

And had come straight to see her upon his return, Kagome noted silently. That which she had always vaguely suspected of the two was fast blooming into a certainty.

"I needed to speak with you again, Sango-sama," was all that she voiced. "I'm glad to find you back, as well, Miroku-sama. Did your errand go well?"

"The troublesome nest was successfully eradicated," he responded easily. "Though I missed dearly the company of the two finest women in the court while I was way."

Sango and Kagome shared a wry look, smiling crookedly at one another. Kagome chuckled softly, her guilt easing.

"Well, then, all airy flatteries aside," Sango said, with a pointed glance at the houshi. "What was it you needed to discuss, Kagome-chan?"

"Ah, well-"

"Pardon me, Tachibana-sama," a servant said, emerging from the trees behind them. The three turned to face her.

"I am sorry to interrupt, but there is a messenger here for you," the servant resumed, bowing. "He says he is from the Tennō-sama, and that the message is important."

Sango frowned, turning a quizzical look on the miko. Kagome shook her head, her expression mirroring the older woman's.

"Allow him forward," Sango instructed the servant. The woman nodded, motioning to a man standing behind her.

The messenger came forward, bowing to Sango and offering up a folded piece of parchment. The noblewoman took it with a word of thanks and the messenger bowed once more before taking his leave.

Miroku and Kagome both crept closer to the woman as she unfolded the note, coming to stand just behind her as she read. From over her shoulder Kagome could see that the note read, in a rough scrawl:

We are aware your father and brother will be returning soon from their mission outside the court. It is Our desire that a celebration should be thrown upon their return. We leave to you the arrangements, ordering only that the whole of the court be in attendance. Our funds are at your disposal for the time being.

The note was stamped with a wax seal depicting Amaterasu, marking it as a true missive of the Tennō. Kagome only just managed to keep from gaping openly. She felt a small flutter of pride at the obvious work the hanyou had put into the note even as she wondered at its purpose.

"You did not ask the Tennō-sama to throw a celebration in honor of the return of my father, did you, Kagome-chan?" Sango asked, sounding mildly mortified at the idea as she scanned the note once more.

"No, no. I did not even know your father and brother would be returning soon," she replied, shaking her head.

"Truly?" the noblewoman asked, glancing up at her. "His Majesty must have quite the memory, then, to keep track of such matters…but why a celebration?

"Your father is the head of the Tachibana clan, Sango-sama," Miroku supplied. "And he has been away for quite some time now. Still, a court-wide celebration does seem a bit much…"

A thought struck Kagome at his words. Court-wide. As in, the entire court in one place at one time. A perfect opportunity for observation…

A grin of dawning realization spread across her face, almost giddy in nature. He was doing it for her. He was offering her up the opportunity she wanted. He had been thinking of her. She could not contain a happy little laugh that bubbled up, raising her hand to cover her mouth.

"Kagome-chan?" Miroku said, catching sight of her face. "Do you know something about this?"

Kagome nodded, trying to school her features to look at least a bit less silly.

"I spoke with the Tennō-sama this morning, and told his Majesty that I would like an opportunity to observe the entire court all at once, if possible," she explained. "I believe this is his Majesty's way of offering me that opportunity."

"That's rather clever," Sango said, her brow furrowing thoughtfully. "Inviting all the clans to intermingle under the pretense of a celebration. It might get them to lower their guards a bit."

"And here I was under the vague impression that his Majesty was not the brightest star in the sky, if you will," mused the houshi.

"I suppose his Majesty has his moments," Kagome said, the grin stretching inexorably across her face again. He was working just as hard as she was, and the knowledge fueled further her desire to push forward.

Miroku and Sango exchanged curious glances at the expression on the miko's face. She seemed to glow, lit by some secret warmth from within.

"Does this have anything to do with what you came to speak to me about, Kagome-chan?" Sango asked, waving the paper to recall the girl's attention.

"Yes," she responded, shaking herself mentally. "Though I had meant to come ask you if you could help me think up some way to gather all the courtiers together. I suppose that's taken care of now. There is one other thing, though."

"What is it?"

"The Taira clan," Kagome responded, sobering slightly as she got back to the business at hand. "I need to get some sort of in with them. Some way to gain inside knowledge of their doings. I was hoping the two of you could help me think something up."

Miroku's expression darkened slightly, and he glanced at the line of the trees behind them to make certain none of the servants were close enough to overhear.

"That is a dangerous position to place yourself in, Kagome-chan," he said, his eyes serious as they met hers. "The Taira clan is not to be dealt with lightly. They dislike humans enough as it is. I do not wish to think what they might do should they catch you conspiring against them."

"I'm not conspiring against them," Kagome said. "I'm afraid that they are conspiring. I need to know what they are doing in order to keep them from causing trouble for the Tennō-sama."

"That's too much for you to take on, Kagome-chan," Sango broke in sternly. "I understand that you want to help, but that is too much. You would be putting your life at risk."

"It isn't like I haven't done that already," Kagome replied gently, knowing it was their concern for her that made them fight her. "I know you're both thinking of my safety, and I am sorry to make you worry, but I'm not the priority here. There are much more important things at stake."

Sango looked as if she might argue this point, but seemed to see the truth of reluctantly and bit her lip with a small huff of consternation. Miroku sighed.

"Truly, Kagome-chan, you make things rather difficult," he opined.

"I do hope the Tennō-sama appreciates the lengths you go to. But we will support you nonetheless," Sango put in firmly. "So do try not to keep us in the dark about things. We are always here for you. Do not forget that."

"Thank you," Kagome said, bowing her head in gratitude. "I promise I will try to keep you informed of what I am doing."

"As to the Taira clan, I am not certain we can be of help," Miroku said, looking to Sango.

The noblewoman nodded in agreement. "As Houshi-sama said, the Taira dislike humans. It would be nearly impossible for one to get anywhere near their inner circles. Especially you, with your connection to the Tennō-sama."

"Then it could not be me. And it could not be someone human," Kagome said thoughtfully.

"Only a full youkai would have any luck with this task, I think," Miroku supplied. "Anyone with any sort of mixed blood would not be allowed in."

"A full youkai…" she echoed, turning this over in her head.

Her eyes widened. She knew what to do.

"I've got it!" she exclaimed, surprising both of her companions.

"A way to get in?" Sango asked. Kagome nodded eagerly.

"How?" asked Miroku.

She shook her head. 

"Allow me a bit of time to see if I can make it work, and then I promise I will tell you everything."

Sango frowned disapprovingly. 

"Kagome-chan…"

"Please. Just trust me," she pleaded, clasping her hands imploringly before them.

She was afraid they would not approve if she were to tell them beforehand. But if she could get everything in motion first, they would have no choice but to go along with it despite their reservations.

Miroku and Sango shared a look. He shook his head, and she scowled petulantly.

"As if we could ever hope to stop you," the houshi sighed at last. "But, sooner or later, it would be nice if you could come to rely more on us, Kagome-chan."

"I will. I am certainly relying on you both to put together the celebration," she said earnestly. "I just need to go it on my own for a bit this time."

"Go, then," Sango allowed, waving a hand. "Do what you will, but please be careful. Houshi-sama and I will start on the preparations for the celebration right away."

Kagome beamed at them both, nodding.

"Thank you both. I'm counting on you," she said. "I'll come find you again just as soon as I can get everything worked out."

Ducking in a quick bow, she turned on her heel and started off with purpose.

* * *

Sucking in a deep breath, Kagome attempted to collect herself as she sat amongst the roots of the Goshinboku tree. It had taken a bit of inquiring around among the servants, but at length she had managed to find her quarry. She had quickly had a messenger sent off on her errand before coming to the En no Matsubara to wait.

Any moment now, she mused nervously. She wondered what she was going to say in order to get this all to work out. It was asking a lot, she knew, more than she really had any right to ask. Still, it was a plan she could not abandon without trying.

Youki tingled along her sixth sense and Kagome lifted her gaze up from the ground.

He was here.

Kouga strode eagerly over to stand before her and the miko rose to meet him, donning a tentative smile of her own. She was uncertain exactly what sort of ground they were on after what had happened at the women's outing.

The wolf Lord ended that uncertainty for her quickly. He stepped forward, sweeping her into his arms and pressing her close to himself. Kagome squeaked in surprise, having anticipated at least a bit of annoyance at the small trick she had played.

"I'm glad you called for me, Kagome," he said. "I've missed seeing my woman. And this court's boring as hell without you around."

"I-it is good to see you again, too, Kouga-sama. Though I would appreciate it if you would let me go," she returned, gratified when he released her.

At least she had thought a bit ahead this time. The En no Matsubara was empty at the moment, most of the courtiers and servants in their respective residences eating the afternoon meal as she had hoped. Still, they were meeting in a public place in the light of day. There was nothing that could be called scandalous about this meeting, though she would have to take care that they were not overheard.

She smiled up the wolf Lord, uncertain of how to start the conversation off. He returned her look with his usual wolfish grin, ice blue eyes intently taking in her face as if it had been ages since he last saw her.

He stood very close to her, she noted absently. Though, really, he always stood very close to her. He seemed to have little sense for boundaries. Still, his proximity did not rob her of her wits. It did not inspire her heart to pound. Not in the way that it had that morning with-

"I-I need to talk to you about something, Kouga-sama," she said at last, her gaze dropping to her clasped hands as she reined in her wandering thoughts forcefully.

"What?"

Kagome bit her lip, at a loss as to how to continue. It really was too much to ask.

"It's about the kiss, isn't it?" Kouga supplied slyly, and her eyes shot up to meet his. "You want to give me a real one this time. A real reward."

"I gave you a real reward. You never specified what sort of kiss I had to give you," Kagome returned archly, tempted to smile. 

The wolf Lord was always consistent, she would give him that much.

"You're a tough one, Kagome," Kouga said, eyeing her in a rather pleased manner. "That's alright, though. I like a good chase."

Kagome quirked a brow at him, torn between exasperation and amusement. She settled for shaking her head and trying to get back to her original purpose.

"As I was saying, Kouga-sama, there is something I need to ask you. It is a rather big something, at that," she said, sobering. "And this time, I can offer no real reward aside from my gratitude."

The grin slipped slowly from his face, his eyes becoming serious as they considered her.

"It's important to you, Kagome?" he asked, with a perceptiveness that was rather surprising coming from him. She nodded.

"Very much so. It is part of the reason I am here in the court in the first place. I need to do this, and I could think of no other way than to ask you," she said earnestly, a hint of pleading in her tone. "I know I it will be asking a lot of you, but you are the only one I can trust to do it, Kouga-sama."

"Trust?" he echoed, caught by the word.

"Yes, trust," she repeated, nodding firmly.

"I'll do it, then," he declared.

Kagome blinked, stunned. Her brows drew together incredulously.

"I…I haven't even told you what I'm asking yet, Kouga-sama," she pointed out.

"Don't care," he returned dismissively, waving a hand. "If you trust me to do it, I'll do it, Kagome. I want you. I want you and I'll do whatever it takes to win you over."

Her eyes widened, stunned and touched at how utterly serious he was. He was willing to do this for her, even though she could promise nothing in return. His devotion was truly something to behold. With a small twinge, she wished she could return even a fraction of his feelings. Still…

"Alright, then. We have a deal," she said softly. "…Thank you, Kouga-sama."

She had her in with the Taira clan.

* * *


	12. Of Celebrations and Conflicting Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Historical notes:
> 
> -gagaku: literally 'refined music'. Borrowed from Chinese and Korean forms popular at the time, this music had many different forms and was designed to display a type of refinement in the court. Prestige within the court could actually be gained or lost based on the level of the performance.
> 
> -the first song Kagome sings: literally called 'Hana' or 'Sakura'. I pulled this song from a book of Japanese children's songs I managed to get my hands on. The book told me that it was a traditional children's song, though not how far back exactly it might have extended. I took it because it suited my purposes, so my apologies if anyone discovers it to be a historical fallacy on my part.
> 
> -koto: a traditional Japanese instrument brought over from China around the 7th or 8th century. There is a Korean version of the instrument, as well. It had about 13 strings in the Heian period and was a central part of gagaku in the court. It's hard to describe exactly the sort of sound it makes, but there are plenty of youtube videos of performances for anyone interested enough to look it up.
> 
> -'Kimi wa yo'/'Kimigayo' (Kikyou's song): as many of you know, this is the national anthem in Japan. It originated, though, as an anonymous poem written during the Heian period and was not selected as the national anthem until 1869.
> 
> It is, of course, a celebration of the Emperor of the nation, and so I thought it would be fitting to make use of it. I also made use of the older version of the lyrics that would have been used during the Heian period, as the lyrics were changed during the Kamakura period to suit the purposes of the Bakufu.
> 
> Kagome sings both the Japanese and English lyrics, though they are the same thing. Technically she sings the same verse three times. This was both because the song is very short and I wanted to extend it and because I wanted to give the readers a feel for what it would sound like in both Japanese and English.
> 
> -the list of clans/kami: all kami listed are some of the more prominent ones in the Shinto religion. I do know at least a bit of back-story on each one, but it would take forever to type it all out. I'll probably explore each one a little more as the story goes on, but for now it will remain as a list.
> 
> Also, the kami I assigned to the Minamoto and the Fujiwara were not random, but were historically connected to those two clans during the Heian period. The rest of the assignments, however, were more or less random.
> 
> -ane-ue: an archaic way of saying 'sister'. This is how Kohaku addresses Sango in the series, as well.

A few nights after Kagome’s meeting with the wolf Lord, the new moon rose. Kagome found herself rising that night, drawn from her bed as if by the pull of some unseen force. With little conscious thought she drew on a thick robe over her light sleeping yukata and padded off through the chill night air and the empty pathways to the En no Matsubara.

At first glance there was merely the serene glow of the tree, its branches so vast that they seemed to twine up to tangle with the stars. Beautiful, but somehow disappointing. She found herself frowning out into the empty courtyard.

And then he emerged from the deep shadows at the base of the tree, smirking as if he had known that she would be there. Kagome felt her own expression light up in response as she stepped forward to meet him. 

"So you came after all, wench. And here I thought you might be too busy pissing all the courtiers off."

"Not so busy that I could not take time to come and bother you in their stead. We had a promise, after all," Kagome returned archly. "And I thought that we had already established that I have a name?"

"Ka-go-me, right?" he said, more than a hint of mockery there. "Wench suits you better, if you ask me."

"I do not recall asking you. Though I will ask what I might call you, as you did not deign to tell me before running off the last time," she said.

At this he hesitated, his eyes straying from hers for the first time.

"…Toga," he murmured at last, a bit contemplatively. "Toga is fine."

Kagome's brows drew together at the curious phrasing and lack of clan name, but she decided not to press the issue. This was only her second time meeting the man, after all, and he had no obligation to share intimate details with her.

"Toga-sama it is, then," she said. "Pleased to make your acquaintance…again."

He looked a bit uncomfortable at the use of his name, his eyes shifting to look up at the tangled branches of the Goshinboku. He went over and took a seat atop one of the gnarled roots.

"How have you been doing here?" he said at last, his eyes serious as they peered at her through the darkness. Kagome was a bit taken aback by the sudden shift.

"Well enough," she responded, a bit guardedly.

"Bullshit," he declared. Her eyes flew up to meet his.

“What-”

"Cut the crap, Kagome," Toga cut her off. "I know what you've been doing around here. Hell, the whole court knows what you've been doing. They would have treated you like shit even if you'd done nothin' but try to blend in, so they must be treating you like the seventh level of hell after all you've pulled since you got here."

He pinned her with a searching look, his expression expectant. She hesitated, uncertain if it was wise to speak about such things. At last she moved slowly to take a seat across from him, her eyes fixed on her lap.

"It hasn't been nearly as bad as it might have been," she confessed, more to the ground than to him. "Sango-sama and Miroku-sama have been very kind to me through everything. Midoriko-sama has taken me on as her pupil. And the Tennō-sama…the Tennō-sama has supported me far beyond what I might ever have dared to ask."

She paused. He waited silently, and she could feel his eyes on her.

"I often miss my family," she managed at last, and felt her eyes welling as she had feared they would once she gave voice to the sentiment. "And I often wonder if I am going about all of this the right way. I'm trying my hardest, doing the things that I can, but I feel uncertain.”

"I don't want to say I'm uncertain, though, because this is so important. There's so much depending on this, I don't want to say I'm scared of failing, but…I'm scared of failing. I'm so scared of failing. And I keep wishing I knew the right thing to do, instead of just groping about blindly in every direction and hoping that I can make something of it all..."

The last words were muffled by the sleeves of her robes as Kagome bent her head, attempting as best she could to hide the tears she could feel beginning to flow freely. She had never dared to confide these feelings in anyone since her arrival, afraid that she would reveal a weakness she could not afford in her uncertainty.

Afraid even more that admitting her uncertainty aloud would paralyze her, would keep her from being able to move forward any further in the face of such overwhelming responsibility.

It had all spilled forth helplessly before Toga, though, welling to the surface in a sudden rush. Her hands trembled where she clenched them in her lap. She felt small and scared.

A hand came to rest gingerly on the back of her bowed head, patting her hair in a strangely familiar gesture.

"I knew it. I knew you were trying to hold it in. You're stubborn, after all."

Kagome huffed indignantly, the sound choked and wet with tears.

"Who's stubborn?" she murmured weakly.

"You are. You try to do everything on your own. You try to take all the responsibility for everyone else," he accused.

"How would you know?" Kagome asked, raising her head to gaze up at him incredulously.

The darkness made it difficult to tell, but she could have sworn he flushed at that. He withdrew his hand to scratch awkwardly at the back of his head.

"I just…you're an easy type to read, that's all. All noble and responsible all the time," he said, rolling his eyes.

Kagome scowled, swiping at her eyes. "Well, pardon me for being noble and responsible."

He huffed, gazing levelly back down at her. "It ain't an insult, Kagome."

"Then rolling your eyes is a complimentary gesture here in the court. I will have to keep that in mind.”

"Dammit, woman, I'm not trying to argue with you!" he snapped.

"Well, you're doing a terrible job of it, then!"

They glared at one another for a long moment before a hiccup erupted from Kagome. Toga's expression softened.

"Look, all I mean is you can't be responsible for everything. You said yourself that you're doing what you can, right? Then just keep doing that. It's more than most of the other bastards around here try to do.”

"And…if you ever feel…y'know, worried or anything…well, you've got one night a month where I'll listen to whatever you have to say. Anything."

Kagome felt her own expression soften as she gazed up at him. He seemed to glow in the light of Goshinboku's aura and her heart clenched at the sight.

"Why are you being so kind to me?"

He considered this for a moment, then shook his head.

"Because I want to be," he replied lowly.

Kagome rose slowly, her eyes turned up towards his face. She stepped forward and her arms went around him without thought, but only with such a feeling of gratitude that she could not restrain herself.

She knew she had no real reason to trust this man who had given her nothing more of himself than a first name, but she found that she did. And perhaps in time she would think herself foolish for it, but for the moment she simply believed in him.

"O-Oi-!"

"Thank you, Toga-sama," she murmured, her forehead against his chest. "Thank you for being kind to me, whatever your reasons are. From now on I will come to you. I will only tell you when I am uncertain, and you will have to promise to keep my secret so that I can continue to do my best in the light of day. You will keep my secrets, won't you?"

"…I will," he said, one of his hands settling on her shoulder.

"Then I promise to keep yours, as well, if ever you feel the need to tell me. I want to help you in return if I can," she offered.

"You already do," he said, so lowly that she almost did not hear him.

She tilted her head up to look at him, a question in her gaze. His face was unreadable as he gazed back at her. His grip on her shoulder tightened for a moment as if he might press her closer. Abruptly he averted his eyes and his arm fell away from her.

Kagome flushed, stepping back self-consciously. Perhaps that had been inappropriate of her…

"I have to go for now," he said, and her heart sunk a bit. For the first time she felt the chill of the night air around them.

"I see."

"I'll be back, Kagome. One month from now. And every month after it," he said firmly. "We have a promise."

The corners of her lips turned up slowly. She nodded, her eyes alight as she turned them up to meet his.

"Yes, we do."

He nodded, one corner of his mouth turning up in a grin. He turned and started off across the En no Matsubara, tossing a wave in her direction as he went. She watched after him until he was out of sight.

Somehow she felt stronger, having been able to admit aloud that she was afraid. And Toga had not said a word to condemn her for her admissions, either. It was a comfort, being able to share some of her burdens without having to worry about revealing herself to be weak.

She had rarely allowed herself to express such sentiments, even to her family back in the village. She had always feared that it would somehow be a betrayal of their expectations of her. And in the court she was under far too much scrutiny to even entertain the notion of confessing herself.

Still, Toga had managed to pull it from her with merely a few gruff words. She felt oddly at ease around him, despite the very brief amount of time they had spent together.

She smiled to herself. The kami had blessed her with yet another kind soul in her path. Truly she was fortunate.

She slept soundly that night.

* * *

A mere two weeks stood between the time that the Tennō issued the order that a celebration was to be planned and the time that Sango's father and brother were due to return to the court. This, Sango informed Kagome one night in a particular fit of pique, was hardly enough time to put together a small dinner party for a group of intimate friends, let alone to plan a celebration fit for the entire court.

To this Kagome could only shake her head and smile weakly in return, patting her friend's shoulder in a conciliatory manner. She had little idea of how these things worked, being that she had never had a hand before in the planning of any sort of party.

There hadn't really been any planned in her village, anyway. The celebrations that had happened tended to be spontaneous, based on an excess of wheat harvested that season or the birth of a healthy baby.

Nor could Kagome imagine that Inuyasha had had any idea of how much effort such endeavors took. He had had little to celebrate in his short reign, and hardly seemed the type to concern himself with such matters anyway.

So in the short two week span that followed the announcement, Kagome found that nearly every waking moment was spent at the sides of the taiji-ya and houshi as they struggled valiantly to put together what Sango was perversely determined would be the event of the age.

Kagome helped to clear and temporarily block off the area of the En no Matsubara, where the celebration was to be held. She aided Sango in the arrangement of various silks and flowers and streaming lanterns, all in varying shades of gold and red. Kagome had been the one to timidly suggest the color scheme, as she hoped to ultimately emphasize Inuyasha's role in all of it in some subtle way.

Sango deftly handled the hiring of entertainment, from a troupe of wandering kitsune illusionists to a group within the court known for their refinement in the performance of gagaku music. Miroku was in charge of ordering the food and drink for the celebration, choosing many rare imported Chinese delicacies from some of the travelling merchants he was familiar with.

In short, no expense was spared in the planning. Kagome flinched a bit at the amount of money changing hands all for the sake of one celebration, unable to keep herself from mentally tallying the number of rice bushels that might have been bought back in her village for that amount.

Sango reminded her, however, that wealth was one of the few things the courtiers understood. The more wealth shown, the more respect to be gained. Ultimately it was all to glorify the Tennō’s name, as he had put himself forth in support of the event. Kagome conceded this fact, although a bit reluctantly.

Any time in those brief two weeks not spent attending to the preparations for the celebration was spent at the Tennō's side or tending to her lessons with Midoriko. The restriction of residence visitations went off without a hitch when Inuyasha had put it forth to the Council. The courtiers were now allowed no more than one month out of any given year to spend at their residences, short of any unforeseen disaster.

This seemed a good step to Kagome, and she had suggested he also push for a temporary ban on the construction of any new residences. This had gone through as well, and the building of any new residences had been banned for an entire year. Only repairs on previous residences would be allowed pending review of the damage.

At this the hanyou informed her that the men of Council had begun to grow irritated- "crotchety old bastards" had been his exact words- and they had both agreed that it would be wise to sit back for a time and watch what might happen. There was no use or profit in pushing for everything all at once, after all, and there was no certainty as to the amount of leverage Kagome's efforts had gained them.

So Inuyasha announced to the Council the celebration that was being held in honor of the return of Sango's family from their duties and informed them that attendance was mandatory for all clans. He reported to Kagome with no small smirk that that had "gotten them off their wrinkly old asses" for a moment. There had been no real celebrations held within the palace since the death of his father, and this sudden display of his authority must have been nothing short of stunning to them.

Inuyasha had no doubts that everyone would be in attendance, though, if only in the hopes that he might make a fool of himself. Kagome assured him that this would not be the case, not with Sango at the head of the endeavor, and began to utilize the remainder of their morning meetings to give to Inuyasha the etiquette lessons that Kaede had given to her when she was young.

Inuyasha had grumbled at great deal at this, but ultimately submitted to the lessons sullenly. As he was a bastard son, only his mother had ever attempted to give him lessons before, he informed her, and his time with her had been brief. Kagome's heart ached for his loss, evident even so many years later when he spoke of his mother, and resolved not to let the other woman's efforts go to waste.

They worked at refining his speech to a level worthy of his station. This consisted for the most part of Kagome acting the part of a hypothetical courtier and asking Inuyasha to respond to whatever she said, though it often ended in her becoming so ruffled she nearly smacked him when he could not seem for the life of him to stem the flow of his profanity.

Their progress was slow over those two weeks-slow enough that at times Kagome was tempted to tear at both her hair and his-but at last they came to a point where the Tennō was able to respond civilly, if not elegantly, to the majority of her statements. Though he was still unable to hold himself back if she tried anything even vaguely provoking.

Still, she supposed it was the best she could do for the time being. Also she realized that she would be far better off finding a more capable teacher for the continuation of the Tennō's education. Her lessons with Kaede had really been rudimentary at best, and certainly not designed for someone of Inuyasha’s station. She made a mental note to ask Sango to help her to find someone trustworthy and capable to fill the position.

"Are the preparations for the celebration complete, then?" Inuyasha asked her as they finished their lesson on the eve of the day before Sango's family was to return.

Kagome frowned, blinking at him. Inuyasha frowned in return.

"What is it? Is something wrong?" he asked.

"Somehow I don't like it when you do that," she responded, shaking her head.

Inuyasha's frown deepened to a scowl.

"You spent two nauseating weeks yammering at me to 'speak properly' just so you could tell me that you don't like it?" he practically snarled.

"No, no," Kagome responded quickly, waving a hand in negation before he could work himself into a real pique. "I mean, when it is just the two of us…well, I feel awkward when you speak so formally to just me.”

"And I am sure it takes effort on your part, as well. When it's just the two of us I would like it if you were able to speak freely, Inuyasha-sama. Just be as you are most comfortable being. I'm not a courtier, after all. "

The hanyou frowned, considering this. 

"…Then, just around you, I can do what I want?"

"Yes. I would like it if you could be yourself around me without having to worry, as you have given me the allowance of acting so informally with you, Inuyasha-sama," Kagome returned with a smile. "Besides, I like you better when you're not holding yourself back in any way, Inuyasha-sama."

She flushed a little at her own admission, her eyes fixed shyly on the tatami mat beneath her. The hanyou could feel himself flush slightly in response.

"Alright, then," he agreed, his voice as gruff as he could manage to make it. Kagome smiled shyly, darting a quick glance up at him from beneath her lashes.

"It's getting late. Now that our lesson is done, you had best go get some rest. The celebration is tomorrow and we are all going to be very busy," she said.

"Feh. As if I'd need as much sleep as a human. You go rest up. You're the one that's really gonna need it," he scoffed lightly, waving a dismissive hand.

"Alright, then," Kagome said with wry grin, rising to leave his chambers. "Good night, Inuyasha-sama. Sleep well."

"Night, Kagome. You…you sleep well, too."

* * *

  
The day of the celebration began before dawn for Kagome. She was roused from her bed by several of Kikyou's servants who dragged her into the private bathing chamber she had used the morning of the court women's outing to the sakura grove.

She was scrubbed and rinsed thoroughly in a perfumed bath, her hair oiled and combed until it hung in a shining fall down her back. Despite her protestations she was dressed in a fine juni-hito of red and gold, printed all over with images of cranes. It was heavy, but the servant women informed her that Kikyou had insisted she look her finest for the occasion.

The paling powder was applied to all visible areas of her skin and her lips were painted a vibrant crimson. The line of her eyelashes was exaggerated with kohl and her eyelids were dusted with a fine pale blue powder.

When the preparations were done she was led, stumbling awkwardly in the heavy layers, to Kikyou's chamber. The noblewoman awaited her in the room, her head bent as she plucked a few notes on the koto lying in front of her. The sound was clear and certain, her slender fingers moving deftly over the thirteen strings.

Kagome slid the shoji door closed behind her and Kikyou's gaze rose to meet her own. The future Empress' gaze slid over her form in a look of quick assessment. Finding her appearance acceptable, she nodded and gestured for her to sit.

Kagome did so, slowly and with care, making certain to adjust the layers of the juni-hito around her so that they would not be rumpled when she rose again.

"Can you sing, Kagome?" the future Empress asked without preamble. The village girl blinked, her brows drawing together.

"I suppose I can, Fujiwara-sama. I used to sing for some of the celebrations of in my village. I can hardly claim any great skill in it, though," she replied.

"I will be the judge of your skill," Kikyou returned coolly. "Sing something you know for me. I will accompany you."

She raised her hands to hover expectantly over the koto. Kagome frowned, confused as to why the future Empress was choosing to do this now of all times. Still, one of the village songs popular during her childhood sprung to her mind and she sang:

“ _Lo, see the sakura that stand in the morning mist,_

_I hear them speak to me in a tender tone,_

_In the eve I love to see the waving willows,_

_They stretch their hands to me strolling_

_Alone."_

Kikyou managed to pick up and follow the simple melody of the children's song beautifully on the koto, the music somehow as nostalgic and sweet as Kagome felt while singing the song. She looked on in silent admiration as the noblewoman plucked the last few wavering notes, which seemed to hang mournfully on the air for a few moments longer.

"You play beautifully, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome said softly. Kikyou looked up at her, the usual solemnity of her features softened for a moment in what might have been surprise. Kagome wondered if perhaps she was unaccustomed to hearing such praise.

"I have had many years to practice," the noblewoman replied matter-of-factly. "And your singing is more than adequate for my purposes. Here, you will memorize this for today's celebration."

"W-What? For today's-?"

She looked down at the paper that Kikyou had slid across to her, a few neat rows of perfectly formed kanji on it. It was short, at least, but did the noblewoman really expect her to…?

"You want me to sing this at today's celebration?" she said, feeling slightly nauseous.

"Yes. I composed it specifically for that purpose," the future Empress replied unapologetically.

Kagome was aware of the fact that she was practically gaping at the woman, but could hardly compose herself.

"Y-You cannot sing the song yourself, Fujiwara-sama? I mean, it is yours, and I'm so ill-prepared…"

"While I am highly skilled in many of the noble arts, the kami did not see fit to bless me with the gift of song," Kikyou replied, her eyes lowering to the koto. Kagome could have sworn she saw a faint flush upon her cheeks at the admission, though it was put forward so straightly.

"Moreover," she continued, her eyes lifting to meet Kagome's own. "Your position on the dais was not given merely for show. We two are the Tennō-sama's right and left hands. We bring to His Majesty either glory or shame through our actions.”

"We will bring glory and justify my Lord's decisions through our show of refinement to the court today. We will show that we are among the chosen of the kami, our position, and my Lord's by proxy, divinely approved."

Kagome had not considered this. Sango had mentioned to her during the planning of the celebration that shows of refinement were very important within the court. Respect and prestige could easily be won or lost through such displays, she had explained.

And here though Kikyou had worked hard all on her own to compose a song and music for the glory of the Tennō she had lowered herself to sharing it with the village girl. Kagome could only imagine how difficult that must have been for someone with Kikyou's pride, coming to her for help.

For that matter, it must have also been a blow to find some common-born girl suddenly sitting level with her on the dais. Kagome bit her lip. She could not imagine that Kikyou had been consulted in that matter before it had gone through. She felt a prick of guilt at not having realized sooner.

Even so the future Empress did not act bitterly towards her. Rather she continued to strive to find ways to further Inuyasha’s position within the court. Just as Kagome herself was doing. It was odd to think that they had something in common.

Kagome bowed lowly, palms on the floor before her in a show of both apology and deference.

"As you wish, Fujiwara-sama. I aim, as you do, to serve the Tennō-sama in whatever manner that I can," she said. "I also…I also hope to become a support to you, if you will allow it."

There was silence for a long moment. Kagome flushed, though she did not lift her head, thinking that perhaps her offer was an entirely unwelcome one to the future Empress.

"…I would like that, Kagome," came her voice at last, softer than Kagome had ever heard it before. "Thank you."

Kagome raised her head, stunned at the sight that greeted her. Kikyou was…smiling. It was no more than a faint upturn at the corners of her lips, but her dark eyes seemed to glow in a way that lit her whole face.

Truly she was a beauty, in a myriad of ways. Kagome could see why Inuyasha must have chosen to stay with her even after her clan had fallen. That thought, coming to her unbidden, darkened her expression for a brief moment.

"You have proven yourself time and again to be loyal and hard working, though you lack at times in refinement," the noblewoman pronounced. "I look forward to being able to count on your efforts in the future."

A shy smile spread across Kagome’s face, unused to any sort of praise from the noblewoman. It was nice to think that a woman such as Kikyou might be willing to rely on her.

"I will do my best, Fujiwara-sama," she said.

"Then let us go. The ceremony is to begin soon."

* * *

The celebration began with a welcoming at the northern entrance of the outer Suzakumon gate as Sango's relatives rode in in a procession. The troop of musicians hired for the occasion played as they rode down a corridor of brightly arrayed courtiers, all of them alternately waving or merely observing depending upon their inclination.

This part Kagome watched from a distance, as she was not allowed to be seen until they moved to the decorated enclosure of the En no Matsubara. That was where she, Kikyou, and Inuyasha were to be formally announced before the real celebration could begin.

She watched the proceedings from a hidden side-path until they moved to go stable the horses and the courtiers began to turn towards the En no Matsubara. Kagome hurried on ahead of them along the back paths, happy to have caught a glance of the joy radiating from Sango as she received her father and brother back into the court.

Inside the En no Matsubara she resumed her seat on the improvised dais of ivory and gold inlay that had been placed near the Goshinboku. The future Empress shot her a slightly disapproving glance as she hurried about, her fan flicking in a gesture of pique.

Kagome, managing to successfully arrange the layers of her finery about her so as not to muss them as she knelt upon her own cushion, slid the fan dangling from her wrist open and then slowly closed once more in a gesture of supplication that Sango had shown her. Kikyou tilted her head at this, looking faintly pleased that she had taken in hand her own education in fan language.

Kagome smiled to herself, glancing back towards the large screen of golden and red that obscured the Tennō from view at the top of the dais.

She had known she would need a greater command of fan language and court etiquette in order to make the most of this opportunity that Inuyasha had provided for her and had asked Sango and Midoriko to tutor her while they worked together. She was rather proud of how much she had been able to pick up.

There was a great rustling of fans and silks as the courtiers began to enter the area of the En no Matsubara. Kagome looked on in silent awe at the dazzling array of colors, jewels and fans and silks and all measures of finery that one could imagine. It was like a great migration of exotic birds, their plumage ornate and somewhat mystifying.

She could see the confusion on many of their painted faces as they came to sit on the beautiful silks that had been assigned to each clan specifically. The beginnings of a malicious sort of satisfaction flickered across the fans of some of the women, signaling to one another that their expectations had been vindicated as they took their place in the hot sun without even the shade of a parasol to offer dignity to their positions.

Kagome smiled inwardly at this, content to wait for the moment to come. Sango's family, her father and younger brother at the head, took up their place last on a silk laid out in the center of the celebration. Sango separated herself from the group and came toward the dais, bowing low with a reverential sweep of her fan.

"I thank you for allowing this celebration in honor of my clan's safe return from duty, Tennō-sama," she said, projecting for the entire court to hear. "His Majesty honors us with His care, and in return we seek only to honor the Tennō-sama."

"We are grateful for the efforts of your clan on Our behalf, and shall continue to honor you so long as you shall honor Us," the Tennō returned, and Kagome could feel herself nearly glowing with pride at the authority in his tone. "To all of Our cousins, We are pleased to share with you today the bounty of the wealth with which the kami have blessed Us.”

"Let the celebration commence."

Sango bowed once more before straightening and turning toward the expectant and obviously underwhelmed crowd with a look so smug it was nearly mirthful. Raising her fan high above her head, she drew it in an intricate sweep that seemed to encompass the whole of the sky visible from the En no Matsubara.

In an instance the sky went dark, something like a sweeping wave of ink flooding over it to blot out the sun. The courtiers gasped as the En no Matsubara was thrown into darkness. Kagome could hear Kikyou stir beside her on the dais. She could feel Inuyasha rise from his position behind the screen.

For a long moment there was nothing but darkness. Kagome could feel her pulse quicken with anticipation.

A burst of light erupted within the darkness, and small shards of the light separated out to become twinkling stars in the newly formed night sky. A larger piece came to hang low as a heavy full moon. The paper lanterns strung throughout the En no Matsubara flickered to life row by row, lighting the astonished faces of the courtiers with the glow of a thousand different colors.

The clans burst into motion, twisting and turning to gaze about them at the spectacle that Sango had so cleverly devised. They gaped with wide eyes at the complete transformation, even the cutting sweeps of fans stilled for the moment. She looked down to Sango, and found the noblewoman grinning triumphantly up at her.

"My cousins, by the Tennō-sama's will, even day can be made into night," Sango announced loudly, her fan twisting in a full circle of accomplishment. "On this day His Majesty honors the efforts of my father and brother with this display. Please join us in honoring them."

Music seemed to spring up from within the air itself at this, and the branches of the En no Matsubara swayed softly in the pull of some strange wind. The stars overhead flickered, twinkling in time with the melody. The troop of dancers that had been hired streamed into the area, waving silks and fans in an undulating rhythm as beautiful and timeless as the flow of a river.

Servants moved in, quietly and unobtrusively as the courtiers were distracted by the sounds and sights, to place artfully arranged trays of Chinese delicacies at the center of each seated group. Sango moved to rejoin her clan in the center of the celebrations, her father and brother rising to welcome her with looks of pride and gratitude.

Kagome raised her fan to cover the width of her smile, her joy so great she had to fight to keep from squirming. It had all gone off without a hitch, and the results were more beautiful than she could have envisioned. Even Kikyou sat silent beside her on the steps of the dais, her eyes attentive as she took it all in.

"Oi, Kagome," came the low murmur from behind the screen.

Kagome turned, shifting closer to the screen.

"Yes, Tennō-sama?" she replied, equally softly but well aware of her position at the moment.

"Are those kitsune that I smell?"

"Yes, Tennō-sama," she replied, covering her grin once more with her fan. "Sango-sama came up with the idea, as she has encountered so many kitsune clans in her travels. She thought it would truly be something to have them use illusions to cover the En no Matsubara in night during the day time. They are responsible for the music you can hear, as well.”

"She hired a whole troop of them, thirty or so in all. There should be more displays to come any moment now…"

A faint 'pop' and a handful of gasps finished her sentence for her, as a rain of sakura petals fluttered down from mid-air to shower the Minamoto clan. Some of the women positively cooed with delight, the men laughing heartily as the rain caught in their clothes and hair. Several more pops left other clans equally amused, a variety of fine flowers falling down around them.

Several large, glowing cranes also blinked into sudden existence, strutting through the En no Matsubara among the courtiers to mingle with the dancers as they swayed about. Kagome heard a soft hum of approval from Kikyou at the sight.

"The kitsune are very skilled, aren't they, Tennō-sama?" she murmured happily to him.

"Mmm. That Tachibana woman is pretty clever. Knows exactly how to get to these snobs. This is one display they won't be able to tear down any time soon."

Kagome nodded her agreement, filled to the brim with pride in her friend's accomplishment. The awe of the court was obvious at the skill and refinement of taste put into the planning, heightened by the fact that many of them had come in expecting little to nothing from their current Tennō.

This would go a long way toward combating the image they must have manufactured through a combination of rumors and stumblings on Inuyasha's part that he was an unrefined ruffian unfit to hold his position.

Undoubtedly it would not sway the hearts of those major clans that were so thoroughly set against him, but there was hope for the minor clans at least who might see this first display of power from him and hope to gain influence in the court by pledging their loyalties.

Which reminded Kagome of her original mission in all of this. She pulled from her long sleeve a sheaf of rice paper and a rough coal stick she had been given by the servants. It made a bit of a mess of her hands, but she could hardly bring something as conspicuous as a brush and ink stone up onto the dais with her.

The courtiers had begun to move freely about the En no Matsubara now that the initial excitements were over, visiting and mingling with one another amidst the occasional pop of a burst of flowers here and there. The glow of kitsune-bi, which had before been serving as the stars in the sky, had sunk down gradually to provide further light for them.

The Minamoto were intermingling with a number of the lesser human clans, and Kagome took swift note of these on her parchment.

Sango had done her the great favor of requiring that all clans in attendance wear a symbol of their clan's founding kami somewhere on their person while in attendance. This was not an uncommon practice, the noblewoman had informed her, and so it was not odd to ask.

The Minamoto, who wore the symbol of Hachiman, were surrounded by clans wearing the emblem of Ame-no-Uzume and Inari respectively. Akitoki was among them, chatting amicably with a female courtier and wearing the symbol of Ame-no-Uzume. That was the Hojo clan, then. They seemed to get along well with the Minamoto.

The Taira clan, wearing the symbol of Susano-no-Mikoto, was surrounded entirely by clans of youkai, as might be expected. On the fringes of the group, though, some of the youkai mingled tepidly with the Minamoto. The relation was obviously not a warm one, but enough to be dangerous to Inuyasha.

Kagome took careful note of the minor human clans that mingled with the Taira. Sukuna-Biko-Na, Raijin, and Fūjin were their respective deities. Their loyalties must be counted as suspect.

The youkai clans who mingled with the Taira were noted, as well. Tsukiyomi-no-Mikoto, Ninigi-no-Mikoto, Ryūjin, and Toyotama-hime.

Lastly Kagome turned toward the Tachibana. Many clans passed them briefly, offering the obligatory welcome back to the Heian-kyō, but there were a few minor clans that lingered about to chat more intimately with them.

For the most part they were human, but there were a couple of lesser youkai clans, as well. The humans bore the symbols of Tenjin, Omoikane, Sarutahiko, and Uke Mochi. The youkai wore the marks of Ōhoyamatsumi and Konohanasakuya-hime.

Kagome copied this all down quickly, taking note as well of the minor clans that kept more to themselves. Sango had perhaps overestimated a bit in saying that there were hundreds of minor clans, though there were likely at least one hundred. For the most part, though, the number of members in any given minor clan did not appear to be very large.

Even so, winning over a number of the minor clans would be a good step. It would both serve to take power and resources from the greater clans and to lend that power to Inuyasha. The clans that kept mostly to themselves seemed to be the best targets for such a maneuver.

There was no sight anywhere of the Fujiwara clan, who would have worn the emblem of Ame-no-Koyami as Kikyou-sama did upon her fan. Kagome frowned at this. Most likely they were all holed up in their residence outside of the court.

Even if there were very few of them left, though, it would at least make for a good show of loyalty and support to the Tennō if they were to return. Kagome made a mental note to bring this up with Kikyou at a later date, to see if the noblewoman could not entice her kinsmen to return.

Several times Kagome caught sight of Kouga, mingling amongst the many youkai surrounding the Taira clan. They seemed to accept him without too much fuss, and one red-headed wolf youkai among them trailed after him for quite some time. He looked distinctly uncomfortable at this and Kagome laughed to herself.

She also caught a few brief glances of the man who fit the description Sango had given her of the Taira clan's head. It was difficult to tell from such a distance what sort of youkai he was, but his hair was pure white and his skin very pale. Oddly enough the feel of his youki seemed very muted amongst the others, whereas she had expected something great and powerful.

He glanced briefly in her direction once, his violet eyes skimming up over the dais. There was something empty about his eyes, some sort of presence that seemed to be lacking. Kagome filed this thought away to ponder at a later date.

Kikyou did her duty as future Empress gracefully, going around to greet everyone and exchange a few words. She welcomed back Sango's clan members warmly, obviously aware of where their loyalties were, and she seemed to give special thanks to Sango.

She was tense upon greeting the Taira, but managed to ignore the spiteful sweepings of their fans and give what looked like at least a few polite words. The Minamoto welcomed her, simpering as before.

Seeing that Kagome was hard at work, the future Empress had allowed her to remain and continue observing this time. Kagome was glad that she did not have to join the noblewoman in her duties. She did not have nearly the amount of tact and diplomacy required to deal with such people.

She admired Kikyou's ability to remain so steadfast through it all. Perhaps her face was stoic, but it was not unkind for the most part. She dealt fairly with everyone and allowed no one to bring her down to their level.

Kagome wondered how much one would have to endure in life to gain such poise. She imagined it was hard won, and her heart went out to the woman. Truly she did want to be able to help her, even if only a little.

"Oi, Kagome, ain't you gonna eat?" came the low voice once more from behind the screen. From the muffled sound of it, he was eating already.

"Please do not speak with food in your mouth, Tennō-sama," she chided lightly, turning her head toward the screen. "And truthfully, I am not very hungry. I just want to focus on observing for the moment."

"You have to eat sometime, woman," he grumbled. Kagome frowned back at the screen, opening her mouth to reply.

She was interrupted by a small pop on the dais beside her. Rather than a rain of flower petals, though, there stood a small kitsune holding a tray of food. He blinked up at her with wide green eyes before breaking into an ear-splitting grin.

"Did I hear something about food?" he asked, offering the tray up to her.

“Ah, yes. Thank you. But…how in the world…" Kagome said, utterly bemused at the sudden appearance.

"I like your scent," the little kitsune said. "I smelled it when we got here, so I was watching you. You just sat here writing the whole time, so I thought you might be hungry. I'm sure Ma and Pa wouldn't mind me taking a few moments off. I'm Shippou."

"Kagome. Pleased to meet you," Kagome responded, smiling at his childish chatter. She reached for the tray, taking a small piece of something so that the boy would not be hurt.

"Oh, sure, when he tells you to eat…." the hanyou grumbled sourly from behind the screen.

"Oh, hush," Kagome clucked, before taking a bite. It was delicious, though she had been honest when she had said she was not hungry. The thought of her upcoming performance left little room in her stomach for anything besides her nerves.

"Thank you again, Shippou-chan. It was very kind of you," she said once she had swallowed. "You are here working with your family?"

"Mmmm," the boy nodded enthusiastically. "My family are top-level kitsune. The best around at illusions. Someday I'll be the best, too."

"I am certain you will be," Kagome agreed, wanting nothing more than to reach out and pinch his cheeks. How she had missed the innocence and simplicity of children!

"I'll come perform for you once I am, Kagome," Shippou promised, puffing up with pride. "You'll be so impressed, I promise!"

A snort emanated from behind the curtain and she turned a frown on it. Shippou blinked, sidling up closer to place a small hand on her leg.

"What's that?" he inquired.

"Someone who still has much work to do on his manners," Kagome replied shortly.

"Smells like dog," the fox-child commented, pinching his nose shut with a small hand. "Why don't we go somewhere else, Kagome, so the dog smell doesn't get on you?"

"Oi!"

Kagome giggled softly. The kitsune beamed up at her, his hand reaching out to clutch the fabric of her juni-hito.

"I have to stay here for right now, Shippou-chan, but I would be glad to play with you later if you would like," she offered. The kitsune nodded eagerly.

"Good. Then I will come to find you after the celebration, alright?"

"Alright. I'll see you later, Kagome. Try not to get the dog-stink on you, okay?"

The boy disappeared with another pop, the tray that he had set down vanishing with him. There was a low muttering from behind the screen.

"I don't smell. Fucking kitsune."

"Now, now, Inuyasha-sama. He's only a child."

"Child my a-"

He cut himself off as Kikyou approached the dais, having finished making her rounds. She resumed her place, and an attendant came scurrying up a few moments later to place the koto before her.

Kagome's gut clenched at the sight of it. It seemed the moment of the performance had arrived.

Sango came forward to the dais once more, her father and brother accompanying her this time. She raised her fan high, gesturing for silence among the courtiers.

"My cousins, a moment of your time, please," she called.

Gradually the court settled down, turning their attention toward the dais. They looked expectantly upon Sango and her family, wondering what more could possibly be made of the celebration.

"The Tennō-sama has offered me a high honor in giving this celebration," Sango's father spoke, his voice deep and warm. "And now the future Empress and the Tennō-sama's blessed miko wish to honor the court with a display of their skill in His Majesty's honor."

"We thank them for this great privilege," Sango's brother continued. "And ask you all to join us now in listening."

He was a young boy, no more than thirteen. His voice was still high with the remnants of childhood, and he had a kindly face that had not yet matured into manliness. Still, there was something off about his aura as Kagome looked at him. Almost as if something were missing.

Kikyou plucked the first few delicate notes on the koto and Kagome blinked, torn from observing. With as much grace as she could muster, she rose and slid her fan slowly open.

Every eye in the court seemed to be fixated upon her in that moment. She nearly choked at the sight, her face going cold. She could feel Inuyasha just behind her, though, his aura strong, and Sango gazed encouragingly up at her from the foot of the dais.

Taking a deep breath, Kagome closed her eyes and brought her fan down in a graceful arc. Summoning up her aura, she brought her spiritual energy into her lungs and up to surround her fan in a light glow. She could hear the slight gasps that rippled through the court, the flapping of fans, but she ignored these and focused on the melody Kikyou wove so artfully around her.

Drawing up the spiritual energy in her lungs and waving her fan in slow, artful sweeps, she sang:

_"Wa ga kimi wa_

_Chiyo ni yachiyo ni_

_Sazare-ishi no_

_Iwao to narite_

_Koke no musu made_

_You, my Lord_

_Continue for a thousand, eight thousand generations_

_Until the pebbles_

_Grow into boulders_

_Lush with moss_

_Wa ga kimi wa_

_Chiyo ni yachiyo ni_

_Sazare-ishi no_

_Iwao to narite_

_Koke no musu made."_

The last notes of the koto rang proud and clear across the En no Matsubara as she finished, her fan sweeping high to glow against the dark sky. Silence reigned for a long stretch.

At last there was a burst of awed applause, starting among the Tachibana and the Minamoto. The minor human clans joined quickly and enthusiastically, followed hesitantly by the minor youkai clans.

The Taira offered a begrudging smattering of applause, though many of their fans twisted like snakes in gestures of dismissal. Kagome caught sight of Kagura among them, her eyes positively burning with her displeasure.

She felt Inuyasha rise behind the screen as the applause began slowly to die down. Kikyou rose as well, her expression pleased. She swept her fan in a gesture of approval towards Kagome, her eyes warm.

"Cousins," the Tennō intoned, cutting through the last of the chatter. "You see the gifts that the kami have given to Us, Our right and left hand, the future Empress and the miko Kagome. This is their blessing. Our reign shall not fail with them at Our side.”

"We leave you now having given you the gift of being allowed to witness that which is so close to the kami themselves. We leave you with the reminder that We are your sovereign Lord."

With his words the illusion slipped from the sky and the sun shone bright once more over the courtyard. The courtiers blinked, gazing up as if having come out of a dream. They all sat silent for a long moment, each taking in all that they had seen and heard.

The Taira were the first to rise, many of them looking distinctly displeased as they made their way out. The women's fans flapped in varying gestures of disdain and insult.

Kagome grinned wryly to herself. Whatever they might say amongst themselves, it was obvious that they had little ground to stand on as far as complaining about the celebration.

The other courtiers followed slowly after, leaving in small clumps and conversing softly amongst themselves. The Tachibana were the last to rise, turning almost as one to offer a bow to the dais before they began to depart.

"I would say that was a success," Kagome murmured, watching as the last of the courtiers trickled out of the En no Matsubara.

"More than a success," Inuyasha snorted from behind the screen. "Some of 'em were practically groveling by the time you finished singing."

Kagome flushed at the praise, warmed by the pride in Inuyasha's voice. From the corner of her eye she caught sight of Kikyou, frowning slightly in the direction of the screen.

"It was all Fujiwara-sama's idea, Tennō-sama," she said, well aware it was the noblewoman who deserved all credit for the performance. "She wrote the song and asked if I might sing it. She also played the koto so beautifully that I think anything would have sounded good alongside of it."

"I thought it suitable, my Lord," Kikyou demurred.

"You did well, Kikyou," Inuyasha said, with a softness that surprised Kagome. She saw his hand reach out to clasp Kikyou's from behind the screen. Hers was small and delicate in comparison, and her cheeks flushed warmly at the contact.

Kagome found her gaze fixated to their hands in a kind of shock- they seemed to fit so perfectly together. She felt suddenly alone, empty as the thrill of the celebration's success drained from her abruptly. She stumbled down one step of the dais, forcing herself to tear her gaze away.

"I...I will be going now, Fujiwara-sama, Tennō-sama," she managed, fighting the sudden urge to simply flee. She bowed and turned to hurry off across the En no Matsubara.

She thought she might have heard one of them call after her, but did not have the heart to turn and go back. She should have been happy. Overjoyed, even. Everything had gone perfectly. She had gotten everything that she had hoped for out of the celebration.

But all she could think of were their hands, so perfect in contrast. So very perfect that it hurt her to see it. She felt lost in the sudden jumble of her own thoughts.

She returned to her place at the Fujiwara residence and requested that the servants undo that morning's work, removing the juni-hito along with her make-up.

Clean again, she sat in silence in her room for a stretch of time. She glanced listlessly the rice paper sheaves she had filled with notes during the celebration, knowing that she should go over them.

She could not, however, seem to find it in herself to do anything productive. At last she merely lay down in her futon as the sun set outside of her window.

She was merely tired from all of the day's excitement, she thought to herself as she drifted off. Tired and somehow deeply sad.

* * *

Something on her stomach was heavy. Kagome shifted, only half-awake as she attempted to dislodge the weight. It squeaked, moving so that it was now on her back.

She blinked, her head lifting from her pillow as she wondered exactly what kind of weight would squeak. She blinked sleepily down towards her legs, her eyes slowly coming into focus on a shock of red hair and lively green eyes.

"Good morning, Kagome," Shippou chirped from his perch on her back.

"Shippou-chan?" she murmured, sitting up slowly so as not to send the boy tumbling. "What are you doing here? And so early?"

"You didn't come to find me yesterday," the kitsune said with an accusing pout. "So I decided I'd come find you today. Your scent wasn't very hard to track, and my family is staying here to entertain the Tachibana clan a few more days before we have to move on."

"I'm sorry, Shippou-chan. I forgot all about yesterday," Kagome confessed, feeling guilty at having broken her promise to the child. She had thought of nothing but getting away after seeing…

"How about I make it up to you by spending the whole day together?" she proposed, forcing her thoughts from that particular track. "We can play whatever you like, alright?"

Shippou nodded eagerly, tugging at her hand to help her out of bed. Kagome chuckled, rising and opening her shoji door to call for one of the servants. She asked the woman to bring enough breakfast for two to her room, showing her the small kitsune that was her impromptu guest. The woman chuckled and went off to fetch the food.

Kagome pulled a fresh set of miko robes from the trunk in her room and changed quickly, unselfconscious as Shippou was yet only a child. She had just finished combing out the length of her hair by the time the servant woman returned with the food.

She chatted happily with the little boy as they ate, asking him about his family and their travels across the land. He had a number of amusing stories about the many people they had met while trooping across Japan, and he made her laugh endlessly with his impressions and silly faces.

When they had finished eating, Shippou expressed his desire to go play onigokko out in the En no Matsubara. Kagome agreed readily, childishly thrilled at the idea of being allowed to play so freely.

They made it as far as the outer gate of the Fujiwara residence before they were stopped by a timid-looking noblewoman who waited there. She was small in stature, her eyes a light shade of brown and her hair grown down past her knees. Her face was round in an adorably childish sort of way, her brows drawn together in a frown that seemed to have been there for quite some time.

"M-Miko-sama?" she called as Shippou and Kagome were about to pass her by.

They stopped, turning back to look at her. She stepped forward hesitantly.

"I am sorry to bother you, Miko-sama," the woman apologized, bowing lowly. "I know you must be very busy. But I have an urgent request that I hope you will allow me. You see, my little son has been ill for quite some time.”

"My family has brought in several different spiritualist healers, but none have been able heal him. I…I fear his time may be running out, and I have seen and heard tales of the many miracles you have performed. After seeing you at the celebration yesterday and hearing you sing, I feel certain in my heart that the kami have chosen you. Please, Miko-sama, I beg you to try and heal my son."

She bowed low again, her head bent wearily. It was not hard to see that she had been bearing the burden of her son's illness for quite some time. Kagome touched her lightly on the shoulder.

"I will do all that I can for your son. Please lead me to him," she said softly. She sent an apologetic glance to Shippou for the delay of their plans, but he seemed to understand the seriousness of the situation and merely hopped up to ride on her shoulder.

"Thank you, Miko-sama, thank you so much," the woman said, her voice hoarse with feeling. She looked so relieved that she might cry as she took Kagome's hand, drawing her quickly along behind her through a number of the paths of the court.

Her residence was a relatively small one along the western wall of the outer Suzakumon gate. The emblem of Omoikane was carved into the entryway, and Kagome recalled vaguely that she had seen the woman's clan associating with the Tachibana at the celebration.

What was more surprising, though, was the crowd gathered outside the woman's residence. Most were human, though a few youkai were scattered here and there as well. Sango's brother was among them, watching as the woman brought her forward.

"I apologize for the crowd, Miko-sama," the woman murmured, flushing in embarrassment. "I had informed a few of my relatives that I intended to seek your help with my son, and before I knew it it was like this. They are all eager to see you perform a miracle."

Or to see if she would fail, Kagome thought to herself. Even so, they were not her concern at the moment.

"As long as they do not attempt to enter the room while I heal him, there is no problem," she replied reassuringly. The woman relaxed a fraction, smiling faintly as she guided her through the throng of staring courtiers.

She was led through several corridors within the residence before they reached the room in which the young boy lay. He was no more than ten years old at most, though his face was haggard beyond his years. His skin was pale as death itself, and he seemed to be breathing only very shallowly beneath the cover of the futon.

The entire room, though it was spacious and light streamed in from a few windows, had a heavy feeling to it. It was almost ominous.

Kagome could feel Shippou tense from his perch on her shoulder.

"I don't like this," he spoke into her ear. "It doesn't smell right, Kagome."

She nodded, though she was unable to distinguish what it was exactly that was wrong. She went to kneel at the boy's side, examining him quickly from head to toe. There was nothing about his aura that read as being blatantly wrong. It was just oddly muted.

"My Yuutaro was born with a weak body and has always suffered bouts of illness. Recently, however, we had thought that he was doing better. After yesterday's celebration, though, he took a turn for the worst, and he hasn't opened his eyes since.”

"When I spoke to our spiritualist this morning, he said that…that Yuutaro was not likely to live to see dawn tomorrow. He just keeps growing weaker and weaker," the woman explained, her voice catching on a sob.

Kagome frowned, feeling the truth of this through her senses. His pulse was very weak and his aura seemed to grow fainter every moment.

"Can I get you anything, Miko-sama?" the boy's mother asked anxiously from the door way.

"Silence and time are all that I require," Kagome replied, lifting her palms to hover the length of the boy's body. Still she could get no sense of exactly what the disturbance was.

Forcing her spiritual energy into her palms, she pressed them over the boy's heart and closed her eyes.

It was…dark. Very dark. There seemed to be no life anywhere within the boy, though he continued to breathe.

She stretched out her senses within him, searching desperately for some sign that he might still be saved.

There was a light, very, very faint. She attempted to touch it with her own aura, but somehow could not make contact. It seemed to be contained within something else.

She forced her aura against it once more, harder this time. There was a flare that she felt like the rake of hot coals across her senses and she nearly cried out.

When she was able to see again, it became clear what was trapping the small light. There was a great shadow in the shape of a spider wrapped entirely around it, gnawing away at it bit by bit. It seemed to have no spiritual force of its own, but merely leeched off of the boy's. That was why his aura had seemed to be muted.

She hesitated a moment, unsure how to approach the thing. She had never dealt with anything quite like it before. She knew she needed to destroy it before it consumed the last of the boy's life force, but wondered if the boy would be hurt by her doing so.

At last she decided it would be best to lure it away. If it needed energy to feed off of, surely hers would make the better meal. She brought forth a large orb of her own energy, feeding it into the boy through her palms.

The spider-shadow stirred, its hundreds of eyes drawn towards the glow of her energy. Slowly it disentangled its many legs from its grip around the boy's life force, scuttling towards her own.

The miko drew the ball away from it inch by inch, hoping to lure it from Yuutaro's body without allowing it to touch her. It made a sudden leap, though, and latched onto her energy tightly.

Kagome gasped, her stomach heaving. The thing was like a void, endless and empty as it tried to consume her. She could feel the life being rapidly drained from her as it had been from the boy, the spider's fangs digging deeply into her soul.

She tried to breathe, to force herself to calm down and not lose control. The spider was eating away at her ravenously, and she was quickly losing the energy to fight back. She could feel her physical body growing colder and more distant. Vaguely she could hear Shippou calling to her.

Forcing herself to concentrate, she gathered desperately every last bit of her spiritual energy that she could. If the spider wanted to feed, she would see exactly how much it could handle.

With one giant push she forced all of her remaining energy into ball that the spider was feeding off of. The ball glowed with a blinding light, expanding rapidly inside the spider's grasp. The thing shrieked, unable to contain the sudden rush of power.

It tried to loosen its grasp and scuttle away at the last moment, but the light followed and consumed it thoroughly. It dissolved before the onslaught of Kagome's spiritual energy.

She gasped in a breath as she was finally able to open the eyes of her physical body. Her entire body had begun to tremble violently and she had to put down a shaking hand to steady herself as she leaned over the boy.

She looked down at him, and Yuutaro gazed back up at her with eyes as dark as the night. A smile bloomed across his face, a face that no longer bore the haggard marks of illness.

"Thank you," he said softly. Kagome smiled, feeling completely drained.

"You're welcome."

She nearly slumped over, but Shippou rushed in to steady her. The mother hurried into the room, sobs wracking her frame as she realized that her son was awake.

"Yuutaro, Yuutaro!" she wailed, clutching the boy to herself. "My baby! My boy! Oh, Yuutaro, you're alright! You're alright!"

"I'm fine, mother," the boy murmured, wrapping his arms tightly about her in return. 

"Are you okay, Kagome?" Shippou asked anxiously, helping her to sit up. She attempted a reassuring smile, reaching out to pat the kit’s head with hands that were quickly growing worryingly numb.

"I'm fine, Shippou-chan. Just a little tired," she replied, though she felt weak to her very core.

"Thank you, Miko-sama," the woman said, turning to face her with so much gratitude glowing in her watery eyes that the village girl thought she might burst with it. "You've given me back my son. I am forever indebted to you."

"I did nothing but what the kami call me to do. You owe me nothing. Though I would be glad if you would allow me to return from time to time to check in on him."

"Anything. Anything you might ever ask of my clan will be yours, Miko-sama, without question," the woman pledged solemnly.

"Your loyalty to the Tennō-sama whom I serve is all I will ever ask of you or your clan," the miko returned, managing to stand through sheer force of will. "Please notify me if Yuutaro's condition changes at all."

The mother rose to see her out, and her eyes widened when her son rose with ease as well from the futon.

"I would like to see the Miko-sama out, too, Mother," he said, and the woman nearly burst into tears again. Kagome smiled weakly, the glow of a deed well done warm within her.

"Of course, Yuutaro. Come on," the mother said, taking the boy's hand in her own.

They led her slowly back outside of the residence, the awe in the woman's face growing with each step. Her son nearly glowed with good health, stepping lightly along down the halls.

Shippou kept a steadying hand on Kagome's leg, for which she was grateful. The encounter with the spider had taken more out of her than any healing she had ever done before.

They reached the front gates where the courtiers still stood, eagerly awaiting her emergence. The mother, unable to contain herself, burst into the crowd with her son in tow.

"She has healed my boy! She has brought my Yuutaro back from the brink of death!" she announced, holding up the boy's hand that all might see him. He looked more than a bit embarrassed, but it was ignored in the mother's complete rapture at the renewal of her son's life.

Kagome hung back with the kitsune, unable to summon the energy to face the crowd. They gaped at the boy whose face was bright beneath the morning sun, healthier than many of them had ever seen him before. They murmured amongst themselves, though Kagome had begun to feel so dizzy that she could scarcely catch a word of what was being said.

A hand at her elbow saved her just as she was about to collapse, and she found herself looking up into the face of Sango's younger brother.

"I'll help to get you out of here, Miko-sama. You look tired," he said softly, slinging one of her arms across his shoulders to help her walk. He snuck her quietly behind the crowd, busy as they were gaping at the child as his mother continued to tell the tale of what had occurred.

"You're Sango-sama's little brother, right?" she murmured as he helped her along. She tried to look at him, but her eyes refused to focus on any one thing for very long.

"Tachibana Kohaku," he replied. "Though just Kohaku is fine, Miko-sama. Pleased to meet you after hearing so much from my ane-ue. Would you like me to take you to her? You really do not look well, if you will pardon me for saying so."

"I am just a bit tired, Kohaku-sama. If you could help me back to the Fujiwara residence, I would be very grateful," Kagome replied faintly. She could hardly even follow what he was saying any longer. The sound of his voice seemed to fade in and out.

He nodded, turning his steps in the direction of her residence. Shippou trailed along after them.

"Ane-ue has told me that you are from outside of the court. You came in while I was away. Where exactly did you come from, Miko-sama?"

"Kagome is fine, Kohaku-sama," the village girl murmured. "I came from a small village northwest of here on the Sendai River. Have you been there before?"

"I have. The last part of our assignment was near there," he replied. "You must miss your family. Is it hard being apart from them?"

"Mmm," Kagome replied, fighting to remain awake. "It is hard. But I am trying my best. And the Tennō-sama watches out for me within the court."

"That is good, then. Please feel free to come to me, as well, if ever you are in need. Ane-ue says that she treasures you very much as a friend," Kohaku said. "We are here, Kagome-sama. Do you think you can make it to your room?"

"I'll help her," Shippou piped up, taking hold of one of her hands.

"Thank you for your help, Kohaku-kun. It was a…a pleasure to meet you," Kagome managed to get out.

"The pleasure was entirely mine, Kagome-sama. I look forward to seeing you often around the court."

Kagome smiled and waved him off weakly, but could remember little after that besides a servant's gasp as she stumbled into the hallway of the Fujiwara residence. Shippou called to her from somewhere that sounded very far away, but she could no longer reply.

* * *

Kagome awoke slowly to the feel of something warm on her forehead. She groaned softly, struggling to open her eyes. Her lids felt heavy, as if they had been stuck together.

"Kagome?"

Her eyes slid open at last at the sound of the voice, a blur of white and gold swimming before them. She reached a hand up slowly, feeling as if she were moving through mud.

A hand, warm and callused, grasped at her own tightly.

"Inuyasha-sama?" she mumbled uncertainly. "Where am I?"

"My chambers, you idiot. You've been out for three days already," he returned, his voice tight.

"Three days? I've been asleep for three days?" she repeated dazedly. What in all of Japan had happened to her?

"Midoriko examined you after you collapsed at Kikyou's place. She said you exhausted yourself trying to save that kid. What the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that there was a child that needed saving and a woman who needed my help," Kagome replied, frowning up at him.

"You should have called in Midoriko then, wench! You had no idea what you were up against and you just barreled in without thinking!" he yelled, his golden eyes burning as he hovered over her.

"She asked for my help, Inuyasha-sama, and the boy did not have much time left by the time that I arrived. He would have died if I had hesitated," she argued, struggling to sit up and defend herself.

"You could have died, Kagome!" the hanyou snarled, forcing her back down. 

Her eyes widened. His face was so close to her own that she could see flecks of amber in the irises of his eyes.

"I promised to protect you, and you nearly died," he said lowly, his voice strained. "Can't you just…think before doing something so stupid? If you died, Kagome…."

He trailed off, abruptly pulling away from her. Kagome blinked, her heart racing strangely in her chest.

"I'm sorry, Inuyasha-sama," she found herself saying, though she knew well enough she had only done her duty as a miko.

"Feh," the hanyou huffed, his gaze turned away as if he could no longer bear to look at her.

She bit her lip, trying to hold back the sudden tears that threatened. She had only been doing what she had been brought into the court to do. She had only been doing what she thought was best. She felt groggy and disoriented. She hiccupped, tears rolling slowly down over her cheeks.

The hanyou bolted up as if he had been struck, a panicked look on his face.

"Oi! Oi! Quit it! Kami…don't cry, alright?" he snapped, though the last part sounded more like plea than command.

"Look, I'm just pissed, alright? I shoulda known where you were at…I shoulda made sure someone was around to help you."

Kagome blinked up at him, a few tears still dribbling down her face. He huffed, shaking his head and kneeling back down beside her to wipe awkwardly at her face with one of his sleeves. She frowned, tempted to pull away, but decided after a moment to begrudgingly allow the clumsy ministrations.

"It is not your duty to look out for me all the time, Inuyasha-sama. You don't have to blame yourself if I get hurt doing my duty," she said.

"I do," he insisted, his face solemn. "I made you a promise, Kagome. None of the other court bullshit…Nothing matters more than that."

She was silent, looking up into his face. The look she saw there, solemn and earnest, made her chest ache. She wanted to reach up, to touch his face, but she managed to stifle the urge.

"I am sorry, Inuyasha-sama," she repeated, her voice scarcely above a whisper.

"Yeah," he said, his voice equally hushed. His eyes travelled over her face once more for a long, silent moment before he moved back.

"They've been leaving gifts ever since that day," he said, his voice resuming its usual gruff tone.

"Leaving gifts? Who?" she asked, frowning quizzically.

"The family of the minor clan whose kid you saved. And about seven other minor human clans. A couple of youkai clans, too. They've been leaving offerings for you at the Fujiwara residence. Kikyou is handling them for you, tellin' 'em that you're still too weak to accept visitors or perform any more 'miracles' for awhile.”

"A few of 'em have even brought the offerings directly to me. Turns out the kid you healed was the sole heir to the Takahashi clan. Clans don't forget that kinda stuff."

"That’s good, isn’t it?" Kagome said, a smile stretching across her face. "You can count on the support of a few more clans."

"I'm not interested in trading your life for my support," he returned bitterly.

Kagome's smile dimmed. She struggled to sit up, her hands fisting in the blanket of the futon.

"I promise I will be more cautious next time, Inuyasha-sama, but can't you just congratulate me for once? Can't you just tell me that I did well?" she asked, remembering how easily he had been able to say it to Kikyou at the celebration.

He looked at her for a long moment, his expression unreadable. At last he shook his head. Kagome's heart sank.

"I won't. I can't," he said, his eyes averted from her purposefully. "After three days of waiting and thinking that…I can't. Not right now, Kagome."

Kagome bit her lip, feeling tears begin to sting at the corners of her eyes once more. She fixed her gaze back on her lap.

"I see. Well, do not trouble yourself over me, Inuyasha-sama," she bit out.

"Kagome…"

"Tennō-sama!" A voice from just outside the entryway interrupted whatever he might have said.

"What?" the hanyou barked, annoyed at the intrusion.

"Forgive me, Tennō-sama. Tachibana Hidehiko-sama is here requesting an audience. He says that it is very urgent."

Inuyasha glanced back at Kagome. She nodded, setting aside her own hurt feelings for the moment. Her futon was already arranged behind the screen, so he settled in himself before calling to the guard to allow the man in.

There was the sound of footsteps as he entered. He knelt on the cushion before the screen and the outline of him bowed low respectfully.

"Please excuse my rudeness in coming here so suddenly, Tennō-sama, but I have received news that cannot in good conscience be delayed," he said, and Kagome realized that the voice belonged to Sango's father.

"Speak," the Tennō replied, giving him permission to go on.

"Thank you, Tennō-sama. Scouts were left behind, of course, when we returned from our recent assignment to the northwest along the Sendai river. One of the scouts arrived this morning in the court after three days straight of riding. He was badly injured, and informed me that many of his fellow scouts are dead.”

“It seems that shortly after we left a swarm of wild youkai appeared, seemingly out of nowhere. The scout informed me that they have begun attacking the villages along the Sendai. I humbly request permission to set out immediately with some of my clansmen to protect the villagers and aid my remaining clansmen," he explained, bowing low once more before the screen.

Kagome felt the blood drain from her face as he spoke. Her entire body seemed to run cold, and she reached out instinctively to grasp at Inuyasha's arm. The hanyou looked back at her.

"My village," she breathed, barely loud enough for even his keen ears to catch. "They're near my village."

The hanyou's golden eyes widened.

"You have Our permission to set out immediately, Tachibana Hidehiko," he said, his eyes never leaving hers. "Take whoever among your clans or my guard that you require. Go now. Send word back when you can."

"Thank you, Tennō-sama," the taiji-ya replied, bowing once more before hurrying from the room.

"I have to go," Kagome rasped, struggling to get out from under the futon. Her limbs felt a bit heavy, and her mind seemed to be going in a hundred different directions at once. She couldn't think…she couldn't breathe…

"Calm down," Inuyasha commanded, grasping her shoulders to steady her as she stood. "You're way too weak to be going anywhere right now, let alone running off to fight a swarm of rampaging youkai. The taiji-ya will take care of it. You just-"

"No!" she cried, her eyes wild as she turned them up to meet his own. "They're my family! It's my duty to protect them! You don't understand what damage these youkai can do to a village! You’ve never seen it…the absolute ruin…T-there'll be nothing left of them!"

"You need to stay in the court, Kagome. You can't leave," the hanyou said levelly, trying to ease her panic.

She bit her lip, shaking her head. She could not back down, not now.

"My place is there is much as it is here. My duty is to them as much as to you. Please, Inuyasha-sama, if you care anything for me, you will let me go. I would sooner die than allow myself to turn away when my family needs me," she pleaded, her eyes boring into his own as she gazed up at him.

He hesitated. Allowing her to go alone in the state she was in would be nothing short of a death sentence. But he knew the depths of Kagome's loyalty. He had no doubts that it would kill her should her village be harmed.

He snarled softly to himself, torn. He had already been forced to watch helplessly for three long days as she struggled on the brink of death. The thought of truly being forced to part from her made his stomach turn.

And he had promised to protect her, but how could he protect her if he allowed her to go? He needed to be at her side in order to watch over her and make certain she didn't do anything stupid again...

An idea struck him suddenly.

"I'll let you go, wench," he said decisively.


	13. Of Sins and the Shikon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our need to know info for today:
> 
> -shoki: the miasma Naraku is able to produce in the series. It is highly poisonous and made up of youki, from what I understand.

Events after Inuyasha's begrudging agreement to allow her to leave the court seemed to swirl together for Kagome into a flurry of motion and sound. She had rushed from the Tennō's residence before he could change his mind on the subject, and she could vaguely recall stopping at the Fujiwara residence to grab her bow and arrows.

She could not recall exactly what she had said when she had arrived at the Tachibana residence, but they had accepted her among their party as they readied themselves to depart and now she found herself saddled on the back of a large neko youkai in front of one of the clansmen.

The other members of the clan, Sango's father and brother among them, were similarly situated alongside her as they made their way over the land in leaps and bounds that no horse could ever hope to match. In another situation she might have found it thrilling, but for the moment all her energies were concentrated on attempting to remain calm.

Sango's father, Hidehiko, had informed her that it would take at least two days to reach the villages, even if they rode there without stopping to rest. It frustrated her to no end to find herself so far away when her village truly needed her, and she prayed to every kami she knew that Kaede would be able to hold out until she arrived.

Images of the wrecked villages after the last youkai attack welled up continuously from some poisonous spring in her mind, making her feel ill. She could not imagine what she would do if she found that anyone from her village had been harmed…her mother, her brother, her grandfather, Kaede…

It was awful, and the journey seemed to drag on interminably. Several times the miko nearly slipped from her mount, only to be caught by the man riding behind her. She was still weak after having been unconscious for three days, but nervous energy buzzed through her and kept her going.

They ate a few sparse meals while riding to keep up their strength and save time. Hidehiko and his clan seemed almost as determined as Kagome herself was to protect the villagers, and she admired them for it. Courtiers and distant though they were from the problems of the common born, they still did not forsake their fellow human beings in the face of crisis.

Kagome knew that they were getting close long before Sango's father spoke up to warn the men. The air nearly reeked of youki and she could sense their malice from miles away. It was much worse than the last time and she could sense far more youkai.

With a certainty that came to sit like a weight in her stomach she knew that they had destroyed villages already. There was as yet no way of knowing if her village was one of them, though.

The first charred ruins that they rode through confirmed her grim hunch. The small village had been completely razed, nothing left to mark its place in the world save the ashen piles of a few huts.

Hidehiko urged the Tachibana clansmen to continue on in the hopes that they might yet save other villages from a similar fate, though a couple of the men remained behind to search the wreckage for any survivors. The rest hurried on grimly, determined to catch up with the horde as quickly as possible.

They passed several more villages in similar states of ruin as they rode. Kagome felt herself growing colder at the sight of each one.

Why had she ever left? What had she been thinking? These people, the people of the land who lived every day with no defenses and no advantages, they were the ones who needed her.

They were the ones who needed her protection and while they had been suffering she had been playing a ludicrous game of dress-up and pretend in order to gain the loyalties of people who had no idea what it was to suffer.

What had she been able to achieve for these people? Nothing. She had abandoned even her own family.

Kagome felt very cold.

* * *

At last, after what felt like a long journey through the seventh level of hell, they reached the wreckage of a village that appeared to have been attacked very recently. A few of the homes still burned, and there were fresh tracks upon the scarred earth.

They were yet a few miles east of Kagome's village and her heart began to surge once more within her chest. There was still hope that they had not been touched. She might yet be able to save at least one village…

They sped onward, pressing their youkai mounts into one final burst of speed. Hidehiko pulled his mount up alongside her own as they passed the wrecked village.

"Miko-sama, I mean you no disrespect, but must inform you that my men will be wholly focused on their duties as soon as we reach the horde. I cannot promise that they will be able to protect you if you do not remain close," he said.

"I require no protection," Kagome returned, hefting her quiver of arrows meaningfully. "Tell your men to focus their energies on protecting the villagers. I will be responsible for my own fate."

He considered her for a long moment, his expression a strange combination of sadness and affection.

"My Sango has told me much good of you since my return to the court. I fear, though, Miko-sama, that you attempt to take on burdens beyond your years," he said gravely.

Kagome looked back at him, her expression blank. She was well aware that he was attempting to reach out to her, to offer her some sort of reprieve, but found herself incapable of reaching out in return.

"If I do so, then it is obviously done ineffectively at best," she replied, her expression closed off as she gestured towards the decimated landscape.

Hidehiko frowned, his eyes pained.

"Please take care of yourself, Kagome-sama. My daughter loves you as much as if you had been born her sister. She would be devastated if anything were to happen to you," he said, before kneeing his wolf youkai back to the head of the troop.

Kagome looked after him, but in her heart there was little room for the things of the court at the moment. Even thoughts of Sango were subsumed by her guilt.

An awful keening rent the air suddenly, and then they were upon them.

The youkai were a writhing mass of malice in all forms and sizes, by land and by air. There had to be at least two hundred or so of them and they were just beginning to converge upon Kagome's village.

She could just make out the hunched figure of her former teacher in the distance, stepping forward with bow and arrow at the ready to meet the threat. Several men in what appeared to be the garb of taiji-ya were ranged about her, as well, the remnants of the scouts from the Tachibana clan.

Hidehiko loosed a booming war cry that was echoed by the rest of his clansmen as they drew their weapons. At a signal from him they charged into the fray.

The mount on which Kagome rode leapt high, directly into a large clump of crow youkai. The man behind her struck out with his set of poison throwing kunai, hitting several of the birds with deadly accuracy.

The crows began to converge upon them, talons sharp and beaks rife with the stench of rotted flesh. They attacked the vulnerable hide of her mount, which thrashed and kicked out in turn. Both clansman and miko were nearly dislodged, and Kagome raised her hands and forced out a quick, instinctive wave of spiritual energy.

The nearest of the crow youkai disappeared in the flash and their mount descended back to the ground. Kagome pressed a hand to her stomach, feeling a bit ill at having expended such a large amount of energy without the use of a medium.

She cast a quick glance in the direction of her village, but they were not yet near enough for her to join Kaede. The man behind her unsheathed his katana, urging the neko youkai into a nearby clump of the horde.

Kagome quickly shook off any weakness. She leveled her bow and notched an arrow, firing at the farther out targets as the man cut down the youkai nearest to them. She fired in quick procession, gripping their mount tightly with her knees to remain seated, and many youkai fell beneath their assault as they bounded forward.

They neared the edge of the village as they cut a path through the youkai on the ground, narrowly avoiding claws, fangs, and columns of flame, and Kagome saw her opportunity as the neko youkai made to change directions.

Without a word she unseated herself from the mount and allowed herself to fall, rolling quickly to soften the impact. She barely avoided the clawed feet of several youkai, managing to come out in the clear on the border of her village. She scrabbled quickly to her feet, her eyes darting about to catch a glimpse of Kaede.

The elder miko was several feet to her left, firing arrows imbued with her spiritual energy into the mass. A few of the men and women of the village had come forward to join her, brandishing farming tools and a few rusted swords at any of the youkai that came too close to the elder of their village. Souta was among them, backhoe in hand as he swung away with all his might.

Kagome ran towards the group, hurriedly notching another arrow as she went. A cry went up among them as she joined Kaede, leveling her bow alongside her former mentor. The elder miko offered her no more than a grim smile before firing another arrow.

"Everyone, please stay back!" Kagome called to the villagers, loosing an arrow. "I will protect the village, but I need you to stay away from the youkai!"

They seemed to hesitate, watching as the two miko worked efficiently in tandem to pick off the youkai swarming nearest to the village.

"Go now!" Kagome barked at last, desperate to see them out of harm's way.

This got them moving. The group retreated quickly back towards the village.

Kagome planted her feet in a firm stance, eyeing the swarm. The Tachibana rode through, scattering the youkai into separate clumps and hacking away at them. Kaede followed their movements with her good eye, shooting to aid them when they got into trouble.

Kagome took up the role of protecting the border of the village, scanning the horde and picking off any of the youkai that managed to squirm past the control of the Tachibana.

They could do this, she thought as she fired. If they just kept it up, they would be able to eradicate the horde before it could even touch her village. A glimmer of hope began to lift some of the weight in her chest.

And then something seemed to shift.

One by one the groups of youkai began to cease their attacks and pull back. The Tachibana began to regroup, coming to form a solid barrier in front of the two miko. They all watched warily as the horde withdrew, the rage seemingly having gone out of them.

"What are they doing?" murmured one of the Tachibana men.

"I am not certain, but it allows us a moment to recollect ourselves. Hold the line before the village, men," Hidehiko commanded.

Kagome felt an abrupt tug at her spiritual senses and turned to Kaede. The elder miko seemed to sense it, as well. A frown deepened the lines of her face.

"It is not over yet. Brace yourselves," she called.

A sucking noise sounded across the field, like the air was being drawn from it. Their gazes turned to the youkai, whose outlines had become strangely indistinct. It was as if they had all gone blurry about the edges, and the blur began suddenly to warp and congeal into a solid mass.

It took shape slowly, devoid of light or color, until it had amassed into a hulking black spider. Several of the men cursed. Kagome's eyes widened.

She recognized the thing immediately as a grotesquely magnified version of the thing she had faced inside the little boy, Yuutaro. On top of that, the youki of the thing had magnified tenfold upon its formation. Dread trembled through her hands.

"Kaede-sama," she murmured through lips that had gone numb.

"I know, child," the old woman returned quietly. "But we must stand our ground here. I know that you can do this, Kagome. Have faith in the gifts that the kami have given you, as I have faith."

Kagome could say in all honesty that she had no faith in that moment, face to face with the monster that had nearly killed her once before. But she took a deep breath and braced herself as the thing began to move forward one slow step at a time.

She had failed the other villages, but she could at least save her own.

The spider scuttled out to the mid-point of the field before stopping once more. It lowered its hulking body near to the ground and opened its great maw wide. A roiling cloud of purplish gas began to billow forth, spreading rapidly out in a haze that instantaneously wilted and stripped bare everything in its path.

"Shoki," Kaede murmured, her face going pale. She reached out a withered hand towards the young miko.

"Child, I need your power. I know you are tired, but you must focus everything you have right now or we will all of us be lost."

Kagome nodded, taking the elder miko's hand tightly in her own. She felt the tingle all the way up through her arm as Kaede began to draw from the well of her spiritual energy. A barrier began to flicker to life, expanding out to cover the village and the Tachibana men.

"Concentrate, child," Kaede commanded, as the shoki reached the barrier and began to roil against it. Kagome nodded, closing her eyes and forcing more of her energy up through Kaede. She could feel the barrier growing more solid around them.

"Where did it go? It disappeared into the shoki. Can anyone see it?" she heard one of the Tachibana men say.

She did not dare to open her eyes to look, too focused on feeding her spiritual energy into the barrier Kaede had formed. She could not sense it, though, and her heart sped up.

It was too silent.

Kagome's knees nearly jerked out from under her as something crashed against the top of the barrier. There were exclamations from several of the Tachibana and Kaede's hand tightened around her own. Kagome struggled to regain her focus, lifting her eyes to see what had happened.

The spider youkai had leapt up on top of the barrier. It loomed over them, gazing down with its hundreds of eyes fixed on her and Kaede. Kagome flinched, her muscles beginning to tremble at the amount of energy she was expending to keep it and the shoki out.

The youkai, as if sensing her near-exhaustion, lifted its legs and began to pound away at the barrier. Its youki sparked brightly against her spiritual energy and she cried out, feeling every strike like a blow to her body. The spider's flesh sizzled and burned with each blow, but it continued doggedly as if it could feel no pain.

Kagome fell to her knees, only barely managing to keep her hand in Kaede's. She had to hold on. She had to protect the village. Her head was spinning.

"Miko-sama!"

"Miko-sama! Hold on!"

"Kagome-sama!"

She could hear the Tachibana men calling out to her, yelling for her to hold out. She could feel the spider pounding away at the barrier. She was going to pass out. She was going to throw up. But the village…

The spider youkai brought three of its legs down at once in a particularly savage blow and the barrier flickered. Kagome found herself shoved aside, her head spinning as she rolled a few feet away.

She pushed up shakily on her hands, her gaze darting about frantically. The Tachibana mounts were rearing, the men in chaos as shoki leaked in around them. But where was Kaede?

She felt all the blood drain from her face.

Her teacher was on the ground, one of the spider's legs piercing her chest and pinning her to the earth. She had pushed her out of the way…

Kagome screamed, a wordless, keening sound that echoed even above the chaos of the battle.

A sudden surge of pink light erupted from her and spread out in a flash, cleansing the shoki instantaneously. The spider youkai shrieked, shambling backward as the light touched it.

Kagome climbed shakily to her feet, her breathing labored. She made her way slowly toward the writhing mass of the injured spider, notching an arrow with shaking hands.

"You will not…touch my village," she panted, standing before it and attempting to raise her bow with what little strength she had left.

A leg struck out blindly in the spider's agony, catching her across the side. She was knocked down, skidding across the ground. She groaned, laying face down where she came to rest.

Her limbs were growing numb. Too much of her energy had been expended in that last blast. Her vision was beginning to go black around the edges. She blinked rapidly, trying to gather enough of her wits to move again.

Something touched her, pushing her over onto her back. She lay there, looking up into the half-melted face of the spider as it loomed over her. 

Move, she willed herself. Do something.

She could not.

"You! It's you!" hissed a voice, issuing from somewhere deep within the spider. "Those court whores were cleverer than I gave them credit for. A human vessel! No wonder you were able to become such a pest in the court so quickly, little miko!"

"But it's alright. I'll forgive you, now that you've given me this gift. I can finally finish what I began with that damned dog's death."

It raised one of its few undamaged. Kagome watched, her mind growing strangely more and more detached from the scene. There was simply nothing left in her.

"Kagome!"

A blur of red and white slid through her vision, severing the raised leg before it could descend upon her. Kagome could hear the spider howl in pain and the Tachibana men riding forward to aid in bringing it down at last.

She sighed in relief, slipping into unconsciousness. Her village would be safe.

* * *

Kagome awoke to darkness, relieved only by the glow of a small fire. It was silent in the small hut, and she found that her body ached all the way down to the bones. She groaned.

"Child? Are you awake?" The rasping voice came from somewhere to her right.

She levered herself up slowly and with no small amount of pain, turning to see Kaede laid out on a futon just across from her. The woman looked older than Kagome remembered in the faint light of the fire, her face deeply strained.

Kagome untangled herself from her own futon slowly, gritting her teeth against the protests of her muscles as she made her way over to the elderly woman.

"Are you alright, Kaede-sama?" she asked, but she knew the answer the moment the words had left her mouth.

The elder miko's wounds had been tended and wrapped, but she was pale as death. Her breathing was shallow-the slight wetness to the sound of it suggesting that one of her lungs had been punctured- and her good eye was glazed over with pain.

"K-Kaede-sama, hold on. I can-" she said, raising her palms over the woman. Kaede reached up, grasping her hands in one of her own. Her skin was cold as ice.

"Save your energy, child. You are yet very weak, and my time has come," she wheezed.

"What? No! I can heal you, Kaede-sama. I can-!"

But she could sense it through Kaede's hand.

The glow of her life energy was so faint inside her that it would have been impossible for the young miko to rekindle it even if she had been in peak condition. She could not reverse death.

"Kaede-sama…please…" she breathed, though she had no idea what she was pleading for.

"Hush now, my dearest child. I have not much time left to me in this world, and I have something that I must confess to you before I go. Please, you must listen to my confession," she said, clutching at her hands.

Kagome bit her lip, nodding even as her eyes began to burn.

Kaede took as deep a breath as her injured lung would allow, her eye sliding shut.

"I came to this village many years ago from the court," she murmured, her voice far away as her mind wandered back into the past. "I was attempting to escape the chaos and pain of the throne war. But that was not all. I carried with me also a burden that I had been tasked with caring for."

She wheezed softly for a few moments, attempting to catch her breath. Kagome clutched her hand more tightly between her own, fighting back sobs. Kaede needed to speak, and she would not interrupt.

"Hah…I grow tired, but I will not deprive you of this final truth," she breathed, more to herself than to Kagome. "I told you no lie when I said that I chose this village because of you, my child. Your aura was like a balm to my weary soul. But…it also struck me as a way to escape my burden."

"I was frightened, child, you must understand this! I was frightened and I was a coward. I passed my burden on to you when you were yet too young to understand, and I prayed to the kami I might be forgiven some day for my weakness. I fear, though, that I altered your fate irrevocably in that moment…"

"What are you talking about? I do not understand, Kaede-sama. You were never anything but kind to me," Kagome said, tears spilling down her cheeks. She found her heart was beating a mad tattoo inside her chest.

"Initially I took on your education in the hope of absolving myself," Kaede continued, too far gone to hear her any longer. "I hoped that if I watched over you, protected you, that I could be saved."

"But I…I grew to love you more than anything in the world. Your kindness, Kagome, saved me when I was lost to the world. I love you, and you must forgive this old woman for her sins against you."

A lone tear tracked through the deep folds of her face. Kagome reached out to wipe it away instinctively.

"What have you done, Kaede-sama?" she asked shakily, though she was certain she did not want to know. 

"The Shikon no Tama," Kaede rasped at last, the words heavy with the weight of years of supression. "The O-Miko Midoriko-sama, my teacher, begged me to leave the court and take it with me. I know little of its true nature, but Midoriko-sama warned me that all would be lost if ever it fell into the hands of those with impure hearts."

She pulled her hand from Kagome's own, lowering it to the level of the younger miko's hip. She tapped lightly with one finger at a spot on her right hip.

A soft pink glow emanated from somewhere beneath her skin. Kagome gasped, a strange jolt going through her at contact.

"I hid it within you, child. I wronged you greatly," Kaede said, her voice growing fainter by the moment. "I thought if it were you, your heart would be pure enough. Your power would be enough to keep it safe. I handled your life without any thought for you, and then I grew to love you more than anything else. This is my punishment…I am…so sorry…"

Kagome could feel her slipping away, her light rapidly dimming. Her teacher. Her friend. One of the precious people who had taught her what it was to love and be loved.

She understood what the elder woman was saying. She understood that she had been used. Lied to. Perhaps even wronged very greatly.

In that moment, she did not care.

"You were scared. You were scared and you didn't know what to do, and you were in pain. I don't blame you. I don't. No one would, Kaede-sama. You cared for me. You watched over me. I love you, Kaede-sama," she murmured feelingly, tears spilling down her cheeks as she reached up to smooth the hair back from the elder woman's brow.

"Your heart is bigger than anything, Kagome. Thank you. Being your teacher has been my only salvation in this life. I believe that you will make your own fate, whatever I have done to alter it."

Kagome nodded, her hands trembling against the elder woman's face.

"I love you. I really love you, Kaede-sama," she babbled helplessly.

"I know. And that is all…that anyone could…"

And the light went out.

Kagome sat for many long moments, staring into her mentor's now still face. Slowly she bent forward, burying her face in the front of the woman's robes, and she began to sob openly at last.

"Kaede-sama," she rasped, clutching at her robes like a lost child. "I was…I w-was…I was supposed to save you! I was supposed to protect you for once! Why…like this…?"

"Kagome…"

She shook her head, caring little who it was or what they wanted. She was sobbing so hard she could scarcely draw breath. Everything hurt.

"Kagome!"

A hand tugged her upward away from the body. She spun to glare at the person, trembling all over.

"She's dead," she hissed, and she felt the words like a knife even as she realized that it was Inuyasha in front of her. "Kaede-sama is dead…"

Without a word the hanyou tugged her up against his chest, her head under his chin as his arms went around her tightly. Kagome clutched at his haori without a second thought, leaning her forehead against his chest as she shook.

"Inuyasha! She's dead! S-She's-!" she sobbed helplessly.

"It ain't your fault. You did everything you could," he said, a clawed hand coming to cup the back of her head.

She clung to him like a lifeline, feeling certain in that moment that he was the only stable thing left in the whole world. He held her protectively, listening to her nonsensical ramblings and replying with words that she scarcely remembered, but that comforted her nonetheless.

At last she began to regain a bit of herself, hiccupping softly as the tears gradually subsided. She lifted her head slowly, pulling back a bit. His arms did not loosen around her, and she blinked up into his face quizzically.

His golden eyes were dark, concerned. Kagome felt a small wave of gratitude sweep through her and suddenly realized something.

"You followed me out here," she accused softly.

His eyes shifted guiltily away from her. "…Yeah."

"But what about the court? Do you really think it was wise to come after me?" she asked, concerned.

"I promised to protect you," he insisted stubbornly. "And I made sure the court was taken care of. No one knows I left. Everyone here thinks I'm a personal guard the Tennō assigned to you. My word to you has to come first, Kagome, or what kinda bastard would I be?"

Kagome gazed at him, touched as much as she was worried. His duty should be to the court first, but still…

"You are a very good man, Inuyasha," she murmured, a little awed by him.

"Not good enough to keep you from nearly dying," he returned lowly.

Kagome looked up into his face, the guilt there obvious. Without a thought she levered herself up in his embrace, pressing her lips lightly to his cheek. His skin was warm beneath her lips.

"Good enough to save my life," she said softly as she pulled back. "Thank you."

He looked down at her for a moment, eyes wide, before his face lit up in a deep flush. Kagome felt herself flush in turn, realizing what she had done, and pulled back to a safe distance.

"W-what happened after I passed out?" she asked, her eyes fixed to the floor between them.

She heard him clear his throat forcefully.

"Between me 'n the Tachibana, we took down that spider. It was pretty weak after you got through with it, but it still managed to take out a couple of the huts here before we got it down entirely. No one got hurt, though, and the Tachibana'll stay behind to help rebuild," he said.

Kagome frowned, the image of the spider surfacing in her mind. It was too much of a coincidence that she would encounter the same thing twice in a row. That it would come after the villages surrounding hers specifically. And if she was remembering correctly, it had known something about her within the court…

"Kagome?" Inuyasha said, seeing the sudden shift in her expression.

She raised her eyes to meet his own, wide with dawning horror. He tensed, taking an unconscious step toward her.

"Inuyasha…I do not think that this was random," she said softly, feeling herself go cold as the words hung in the air between them.

“What?"

"The spider youkai," she said. "When I healed that little boy, Yuutaro, the same spider youkai was inside him. The exact same one. And not long after the villages near my village were attacked! And the spider youkai today…it seemed to know me from the court. It said that I had been…troublesome, or something..."

"Kami, Inuyasha…was it after me? All these people…just to get at me…"

He grasped her by the shoulders, shaking her slightly before she could really begin to work herself up. Her shoulders were slight beneath his hands and he felt a twinge in his chest.

"Cut it out, Kagome. If all that shit's true, we need to get you back to the court where it's safe. The thing must've wanted to draw you out here, so we have to get you back," he said.

"No!" Kagome cried. "What if it comes back? I can't abandon my village again! I won't! They don't even have Kaede-sama anymore…"

"Like I said, the Tachibana are staying here. They'll protect your village. You have to-!"

Kagome shook her head frantically, pulling away from him.

"You go back to the court, Inuyasha-sama. I have to stay here. I will not abandon them when they need me," she said firmly, meeting his eyes stubbornly.

The hanyou glared down at her, his upper lip curling back in a slight snarl. She lifted her chin, refusing to back down.

"Fine then, wench!" he barked at last, his eyes flashing. "I ain't going back either!"

Kagome gaped at him. "What?"

"To protect you, I have to stick with you. So if you don't go back, I don't go back either," he said, a vaguely triumphant smirk turning up one corner of his mouth.

"Y-You…You're mad!" Kagome stuttered, stomping one of her feet emphatically. "You can't stay away from the court that long! Only think of what might happen, Inuyasha-sama!"

"I ain't going back on my word to you, wench. You said it yourself, if I hadn't come after you this time, you'd be dead. You look even worse now than you did before. You stay, I stay, simple as that. You want me to go back, then you're coming with," he asserted.

Kagome scowled at him in turn, well aware that there was no budging him now that he had made up his mind. He was incredibly stubborn. And impractical, on top of that. How could he even think of leaving the court unattended?

"A week," she said at last. "Give me one week to at least erect a few protective barriers in this area in case the thing decides to come back. As soon as I am finished, I promise I will return to the court with you."

Inuyasha nodded, a little bit of the edge going out of his expression.

"A week," he agreed. "The way I set things up, the court should be able to hold up until we get back."

She nodded, though she was more than a bit reluctant. She glanced towards the front thatching of the small hut-the temple, actually, now that she had a moment to look at it-and realized with a sinking feeling what she now had to do.

"I need to inform the villagers of Kaede-sama's passing," she said softly.

"Fuck, Kagome, it can at least wait 'til you-"

One look at her face silenced him. She looked more exhausted and grim than he had ever seen her before.

He breathed out in a huff, stepping forward to take her arm and loop it around his shoulders.

"Inuyasha, what-?"

"You're still weak, right? Just lean on me and we’ll go tell 'em, alright?" he said, refusing to meet her eyes.

Kagome smiled faintly at the awkward show of support. He really was a good, good man.

"Alright. Let's go, Inuyasha."

* * *

The village was devastated at the loss of Kaede. She had been with them for many years, witnessed the births of their children, healed them when they were sick, given them guidance in times of trouble.

Many of them looked to Kagome expectantly in the midst of their sorrow and were further devastated to learn that she would not be remaining in the village to replace the miko. 

Kagome felt their unanswered expectations like a weight on her shoulders as she informed them that she could only stay long enough to help with Kaede's funeral and erect a permanent barrier of protection around the village.

Inuyasha stood steadfastly at her side, though, glaring at anyone who looked like they might dare to reproach her. She took comfort from his presence, leaning a little more heavily against him than was strictly necessary.

It was settled upon that Kaede's final rites were to be held the following morning, a cremation in the Shintō tradition. After that Kagome would set up a permanent barrier around the village for its protection before heading out to do what she could for the next few villages.

She promised them that the Tachibana would remain for a few days to help with the reconstruction of the few huts on the fringe of the village that had been destroyed in the spider's final thrashings. This seemed to appease them a bit, but it was not hard to read the resentment in many of their faces.

Kagome could not blame them, though. She had left with promises that she would improve their lives, but she had done little to nothing for them in her time away. And now they had been attacked and lost their village miko only to learn that Kagome could not stay more than a day to aid them.

She was able to meet briefly with her family when she finished addressing the villagers. They embraced her warmly, peppering her with questions about her time away. She and Inuyasha were led into their hut and served tea, though her grandfather was more than a bit wary of the hanyou.

It was strange to sit inside the place she had considered her home for such a long time, feeling like such a stranger. Her family said not one word about her many failures on behalf of the village, did not even intimate that they felt the slightest twinge of disappointment, but Kagome could not help but feel separated from them because of it.

She could scarcely even enjoy the fact that she had at last been able to return to the home she had missed so desperately since her departure. It felt like a lifetime had passed between the two times.

When they offered her her old futon to sleep in for the night, she had to refuse. Somehow she could not even bear the thought. She begged off with the excuse of wanting to watch over Kaede's body inside the temple for the night. They were obviously disappointed, but allowed her to go without a fuss.

Now she lay in the dark of the temple once more, staring blankly up at the thatched roof. Inuyasha sat near the entrance somewhere, having refused when she offered him a futon of his own.

Her body ached deeply from the day's exertions, but somehow she felt very cold. Everything was wrong. She had failed so many people. She had gotten her village and a number of others attacked. Kaede had died because of her.

She did not know what to do. She had no idea how she might begin to redeem herself. Perhaps this was her punishment for attempting to play the games of the court.

"Oi, wench, what are you still doing up?" the hanyou's voice cut through the darkness.

"How did you know I was still awake?" she asked, squinting through the blackness of the hut to try and catch a glimpse of him.

"Your breathing. I can hear it, and it's obvious you ain't asleep. What gives?" he persisted.

"I’m...probably just over-tired after today's exertions," she hedged.

"Bullshit," he declared flatly. "You're beating yourself up again, ain't you? I already told you, there's nothing you coulda done for the old woman-"

"It's not just that!" Kagome burst out, unable to help herself. "It's everything! These people-all these people- I was supposed to help them by going to the court! I was supposed to protect them! And I've done nothing! Absolutely nothing…"

She pressed her fists hard against her burning eyes, desperately trying not to cry. She had no right to, not over this.

"You really think all the shit you've done up until now has been nothing?" he asked, his voice oddly soft in the dark.

"Look around!" Kagome said, flinging one hand out in a sweeping gesture. "Several villages have been destroyed. Kaede-sama is dead. Who knows how many others are dead? I could not even save my own village. And who can say how many other villages just like mine are out there suffering? What have I done, Inuyasha?"

There was silence for a long moment.

"…What have you done? Fuck, Kagome, what haven't you done!" he burst out at last. "You put your life at risk for them time after fucking time! You tried everything! If it were me, I'd expect 'em to grovel at my fucking feet for the things you've done!"

"But what good has it done?" Kagome snapped, sitting up and glaring blindly into the dark. "They're not safe! They're not well fed! Nothing that I have done in the court has touched their lives at all!"

Golden eyes seemed to materialize before her out of nothing, burning like candle light in the darkness. Kagome gasped, her heart jumping in her chest.

"You want it to reach them?" he said lowly. "Then you and me, Kagome, we'll make it reach them. We'll push those fucking courtiers until they have no choice but to help the villages. We'll make sure they're protected, fed. Whatever they need. But you need to stick with me here."

A warm, clawed hand wrapped around one of her own. His eyes caught and held hers. She hardly dared to draw breath, transfixed.

"You need to stick with me, Kagome," he said again. "Stay by my side. We'll fix this shit, all of it, if you can just quit fucking beating yourself up long enough to focus. Can you do that?"

Kagome blinked at him, caught off guard. Her heart was beating erratically in her chest, and she couldn't seem to make a single sound.

"Can you do that?" he pressed more forcefully.

"Yes," Kagome said, almost without thought. "I'll stay with you. I promise I'll stay by your side, Inuyasha."

The eyes softened.

"We're gonna do this, wench. I promise you."

She nodded slowly. Looking into those eyes, so bright and sure even in the dead of night, she felt some of her confidence return.

Together, they would do it.


	14. Of Pain and Pearls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our lesson for today:
> 
> -grave rites: traditionally in Japan, the family of a deceased person will visit their grave and light incense and leave offerings of food for the spirit of the departed person. It is also the duty of the family to clean the grave and maintenance it.

"She has looked upon that form twice now. Judging from her past actions, I doubt that she will allow this to pass without questioning it. A distraction will be necessary," a voice announced coolly.

"And the Jewel?" a female voice responded, her tone equally distant.

"It will be difficult to get near it for the time being. The miko is under the half-breed Tennō's watch, and the Jewel has obviously integrated itself into her body fully. She is able to utilize its power to protect herself."

"I will have the boy keep a close eye on her once she returns to the court. We will wait to strike until we can be certain that she is vulnerable."

"As you wish, my Lord. As to the distraction, do you have any preferences?" the female voice inquired.

"I leave that to you. I will be moving on my own end. I require only that you make enough noise that I remain concealed as I work," the man replied.

"Then I will keep you in the shadows, as always, my Lord."

"Do not disappoint me, or you know well what the consequences will be."

"…Of course, my Lord."

* * *

Kagome blinked slowly, emerging from slumber. Stars glowed brightly within the line of her sight and for a moment she was disoriented. She sat up in her futon, feeling the chill of the night air as the blankets slipped from her torso.

"Kagome? You okay?"

She looked up, catching sight of Inuyasha sitting across from her on the other side of a small fire. Slowly she began to recall where they were.

Just the day before the village had held Kaede's final rites. Kagome had stood at the head of the funeral pyre, Inuyasha at her side as she presided over the ceremony.

She had not shed a tear during the proceedings, forcing herself to see Kaede's spirit out of the world with dignity. It was no good to release a soul into the afterlife by drowning it in tears, and Kaede would not have wanted her to cry, she knew.

Shortly after the ceremony she had excused herself in order to go set up the protective barrier. There were a number of spiritual stones stored in the temple, tools that Kaede had used throughout her lifetime to channel her spiritual energy.

Kagome had taken these and set them around the perimeter of the village, Inuyasha trailing behind her as she worked. Once the stones were set up, however, she was at a bit of a loss. She had no real idea how to go about creating a barrier on her own.

Still, she sat herself in the center of the village and closed her eyes, focusing her spiritual senses on the stones. She could feel the remnants of Kaede's spiritual energy within them, and she began to funnel her own energy into them as well.

The stones reached a point where they were practically thrumming with the combined spiritual energies of the young miko and her mentor. Slowly a barrier began to grow up around the village, forming as if guided by an outside will. Kagome continued to feed her power into it until she was certain it would hold strong even when she was gone.

She felt drained immediately afterward, her body protesting vehemently all her recent abuses of it. Inuyasha carried her back into the village to say her farewells, grumbling under his breath all the while about her lack of common sense.

She informed the villagers that as long as they were within the boundaries of the village they should be safe from any youkai attacks. They seemed to accept this reluctantly, though it was obvious that they had still hoped she would decide to remain with them.

A rather dark look from Inuyasha kept any of them from daring to vocalize this.

He stepped away for a moment, though, when her family came to say their goodbyes. Kagome had little idea what to say to them, her guilt over what had happened to the villages still lurking in the back of her mind.

Her mother seemed to sense her discomfort, enveloping her without a word in her warm embrace. Kagome pressed her forehead against her shoulder, remembering with a wave of nostalgia how she had done the exact same thing as a child.

"My little girl," her mother murmured, bringing up a hand to stroke the hair back from her face. "So much like your father. Always trying to help everybody. Listen, Kagome, listen to me, alright? We all know you're trying. The villagers know it, too. They're just upset right now."

"But nothing worth doing is ever done easily, and you must remember that. It's only been a month! I have faith that, with time, you will do what you set out to do."

"And depending on that young man of yours for a little help every now and then wouldn't hurt either. He's made it obvious that he's more than willing to help you."

Kagome lifted her head, blinking at her mother. She glanced over to the spot where Inuyasha stood, arms folded as he looked off into the distance. She felt a flush creep hotly up her throat and over her face, realizing with a jolt what the two of them must look like to the villagers.

She pressed hand to her rapidly reddening face, eyes wide as her free hand came up to wave in a gesture of negation.

"No, mama, Inuyasha and I aren't-"

Her mother cut her off with a chuckle and a shake of her head.

"There's no need to deny it. I think I've lived long enough to be able to tell when two people are good for each other. He's very handsome, by the way. I'm glad you were finally able to meet someone that you can feel comfortable with," she said.

Kagome knew her face must have been as red as Inuyasha's haori by that point. She floundered, attempting to refute the assertion, but her mother merely leaned in and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"Your home is always open to you here, if you need it, Kagome. And your family is always behind you, whatever happens," she said gently, looking down into her face. "You understand?"

Kagome felt a small smile tip up the corners of her mouth, looking up into her mother's gentle brown eyes. Perhaps the village could not forgive her, but it was obvious that her family had never given up on her. It was comforting to know.

"I understand, mama," she said softly. "Thank you."

She had hugged Souta and her grandfather good-bye, as well, promising to try and come back to visit under happier circumstances. She also made them promise to come for her in the capital if ever something were to happen to them or the village again. Whatever happened, she told them, she would never abandon them or her home.

Shortly afterwards she and Inuyasha had headed out towards the next village, the sun sinking low in the sky as they left. The Taira remained behind to help with the reconstruction, Sango's father promising Kagome that he would send some of his men back to the other villages that had been attacked to aid the survivors.

They had discussed it briefly and decided the best way to handle the matter would be to bring any survivors from the wrecked village into either her village or one of the other villages that she would erect a barrier around. That way they could be certain of safety and the comfort of help from the other villagers.

"Oi, anybody there?"

The words, along with a light rapping of knuckles against her temple, brought Kagome back to the present. She blinked up at the hanyou crouching over her, shaken from her recollections.

"Thought it was best to snap you out of it before you started drooling on yourself or somethin'," Inuyasha scoffed, rapping once more on her head before he sat back.

Kagome flushed faintly, frowning.

"I don't drool," she protested, though her hand came up unconsciously to check both corners of her mouth.

"Ha! The hell you don't," he returned. "A few hours into the night and your futon's practically a puddle."

Kagome blinked, her face heating further.

"You watch me while I'm sleeping?" she practically squeaked, a little mortified at the idea.

That wiped the smirk off of his face rather quickly. His face took on the hue of his haori.

"O-Of course I don't! I mean, I don't gotta sleep as much as you humans do, and it's my job to look out for you anyway and…"

He trailed off, obviously realizing that he had given himself away. He spun away from her with a too-loud scoff, marching back over to his side of the camp stiffly.

Kagome blinked, a chuckle welling up in the face of his discomfort. He was only looking out for her, even if he had caught her drooling.

"Well, thank you for watching out for me. I appreciate it," she called after him.

He blinked, some of the red fading from his cheeks as he eyed her over his shoulder. He puffed up a bit, obviously a little pleased at the praise.

"Feh. Whatever. Now go to sleep so we can hurry up and get to the next village early tomorrow morning," he ordered.

"Yes, yes," she sighed, laying back in her futon and closing her eyes once more.

She had set up no protective barriers around their camp, despite it being in the middle of a forest. Inuyasha had ordered her not to, telling her to save what little strength she could recover for the villages. Even so, she felt entirely secure in the knowledge that Inuyasha was watching over her.

"Good night, Inuyasha," she said softly, liking the ritual of it perhaps a bit more than she should have.

"Night, Kagome," he murmured in return, and she suspected he enjoyed it a little bit, too.

* * *

In the next few days a routine of sorts developed. Early in the mornings Inuyasha would carry her into the next closest village along the river. They would meet with the village head and Kagome would explain what had happened and what she intended to do.

For the most part the villages agreed readily to her offer, already all too familiar with the havoc that youkai attacks could wreak on an unprepared village. Some, though, were hesitant and suspicious, especially when it came out that Kagome had been serving in the court.

They mistrusted the court and everything about it. It had never been there for them before, they asserted, and they had no reason to depend upon it now to help them.

However saddened Kagome was to hear this, there was little she could say against it. Inuyasha looked on at these exchanges, his expression grim. She could only imagine how it must make him feel to hear such things.

Still, she was eventually able to persuade even the most stubborn of them that she was only concerned with keeping them safe and that there would be no court strings attached to the service. Protective barriers were raised, though little gratitude was expressed in return.

They never remained in the villages overnight. Many of the villagers seemed wary of Inuyasha, some even hostile, and Inuyasha seemed equally uncomfortable in their midst. 

Thus Kagome made a point at the first village of stating her preference towards moving on before nightfall, ostensibly for the sake of getting a head start to the next village the following morning.

She and Inuyasha spent the nights camped out in the woods together. Under other circumstances this might have worried her, her powers too weak at the end of each day to form any sort of protection. However, all throughout each night she could feel the gaze of the hanyou upon her, watching over her. She slept soundly.

* * *

On the fifth day of their travels together, they reached a village that was tucked back among a range of small mountains along the river. Something about the place felt different to Kagome, though she could not say exactly how or why. Inuyasha seemed to feel it as well, something in his stance becoming tense as they drew near.

The reaction they received from the villagers upon their learning about Kagome's court connections went further to confirm that something was indeed off. Certainly some of the other villages had been mistrustful of her, but the reaction from the villagers there was nothing short of violent.

They attempted to force her out bodily and only Inuyasha's protection prevented this from happening. She pleaded with the hanyou not to hurt them, to give her a chance to understand what was happening, but it was difficult when all the men in the village stood armed and ready against only the two of them.

"Please," she called, trying to peek out from behind the solid wall of hanyou rooted squarely in front of her. "Please stop this. We are only here to help. There have been youkai attacks recently-"

"My village will gladly take its chances against the youkai, if more court interference is the alternative," the village headman cut her off, though his eyes and sword were locked onto Inuyasha's movements in front of her. The hanyou's lip curled in the beginnings of a warning snarl.

"What do you mean, more interference?" Kagome asked, placing a restraining hand on her protector's shoulder. "I have not seen any sign of a court presence here in this village."

"Of course not! It was destroyed five years ago along with most of our village! The presence of the Konoe clan house nearly got us all killed. It's taken us this long to even get back to the point of scraping by, and we won't have the court coming in here to drag us down again!"

Kagome opened her mouth, another question half-formed on the tip of her tongue, but paused as she felt a sudden shift in the hanyou before her. His shoulders felt as if they had been pulled taut like the string of a bow. The little she could see of his face from over his shoulder had lost its fierceness, replaced instead by blank disbelief.

"Inuyasha?" she murmured softly.

He blinked, his head turning vaguely in her direction though his eyes remained distant.

"My mother," he spoke lowly, almost more to himself than to her. "This was my mother's home. This was where she was killed."

Kagome felt her eyes grow wide. Almost without conscious thought she grabbed Inuyasha's arm and began to pull, leading him back out of the village. He blinked, coming back to himself a bit, but still allowed himself to be led along.

The villagers jeered as they went, cheering their departure, but Kagome chose to ignore it for the moment. They could come back and try again once they had sorted themselves out. Inuyasha had to come first.

She tugged him along until they were a safe distance outside of the village's borders before spinning to face him. Her hands came up to the sides of his face, forcing him to meet her concerned gaze.

"Are you alright?" she asked, searching his eyes with her own.

"I-I'm fine, wench," he blustered, flushing as he swatted her hands away. "I…was just surprised, that's all. I just didn't think I'd ever actually come here. Where she..."

He trailed off, his gaze turning inward once more.

"Then…this is where your mother's clan lived outside of the court?" Kagome ventured softly.

He nodded.

"Yeah. The Konoe clan. This village must've been on their land. My mother…after she had me, things…got rough for her in the court. So she…after awhile she thought it would be better if she came out here to live. Just...just until things calmed down. But she..."

Kagome bit her lip, reaching out to grasp his hand.

"She didn't come back?"

"There was an attack. Band of raiders took the place by surprise. No one from the clan survived," Inuyasha said tersely. The hand beneath Kagome's curled into a fist.

"Oh, Inuyasha…"

"Let's go, Kagome," the hanyou interrupted, turning away abruptly. "They obviously don't want us here, and they might try to hurt you if go back again. So let's just go."

His pain was obvious, even after so many years. He had never gotten a chance to say good-bye. To see her one last time. He had been no more than a child and one day she had simply been gone. Of course it would still hurt him.

"I…I think we should stay," she called hesitantly after him.

He paused, though he did not turn to face her. His shoulders tensed.

"Kagome…"

"Please, Inuyasha. I can't imagine how painful this must be for you, but…don't you think you should at least take the chance to say good-bye? To pay respects to your mother's grave? You might never get one again."

"It's obvious, how much you must have loved her. And I'm sure she must have loved you, too. So…please, just stay to say good-bye. So that both of you can be at peace."

He was silent and still for a long moment. Kagome waited, praying he would take the chance to unburden himself if only a bit.

At last he turned to her. His expression was uncertain, hesitant. Kagome instinctively held out a hand towards him.

"I'll be with you if you want me to be, or I'll wait here if you want me to," she offered hopefully.

He sighed, tromping forward to seize her outstretched hand in his own. He started back towards the village, tugging her along after him.

"C'mon, then. Since you obviously ain't gonna let this go," he grumbled.

Kagome smiled.

* * *

They avoided going directly into the village this time, preferring not to have to deal with the villagers for the time being. Instead they skirted around the edges, searching for any sign of where the Konoe residence might have been.

After almost half an hour's search they came to the easternmost part of the village and a large, open plot of grassy land. Littered over the surface of it was a series of grave-markers, varying in shape and size. A graveyard.

Inuyasha paused on the outer edges of the plot, his face darkening. He had yet to let go of her hand, and Kagome tightened her hand around his in silent support. After a long moment, he started forward.

The majority of the graves seemed to belong to villagers who had died in the raid, judging from the writing on the headstones. Though headstone might have been too extravagant a word to describe the grave markers, many of them little more than stones with a few crude kanji carved into them. The poverty of the village was obvious.

Kagome felt she could understand the villagers' rage somewhat, the sweeping plain covered as far as she could see with graves. They had obviously lost a lot in the raid. And they were not the only ones, she thought as she glanced at the hanyou beside her.

His eyes lingered over each headstone they passed, a brief flash of relief lighting in them as each one failed to be the one they sought. His hand continued to tighten around hers in grim anticipation, though, as each one brought them one step closer to his mother's.

They reached a place where the plain began to slope upward into a hill. Atop the hill was a section of graves set apart from the rest. Even from a distance it was easy to see that moss had grown up over many of the headstones on the hill, their care far more neglected than all the rest.

Inuyasha came to halt at the foot of the hill, his gaze fixed on the graves atop it. Kagome turned to look at him, waiting quietly.

"Those graves…no one's been taking care of 'em like the others," he murmured, though he did not look at her as he spoke.

Kagome glanced back up the graves, nodding slowly. No offerings of incense or food sat before any of the headstones. Grave rites were clearly not being observed there.

"They smell different, too," the hanyou continued. "Familiar."

"…The Konoe clan graves?" Kagome ventured slowly.

Inuyasha nodded, though he did not move. For several minutes he merely stood there as if rooted to the spot, staring up at the graves. Kagome watched him silently, waiting for him to be ready. 

At last he released her hand and began to stride up the hill with purpose. She scrambled up after him, reaching the top several seconds after he did.

He was kneeling before one of the stones by the time she caught up, his nose nearly pressed against it as his brow furrowed in concentration. Kagome frowned, blinking at the odd sight.

"Inuyasha?" she said, taking a step toward his bent figure. She could hear the snuffling sounds as he scented the stone.

He took one last, long sniff before turning to look at her. His brows were drawn together sharply, his confusion evident.

"It smells like my old man," he said, though he did not sound like he quite believed it. "This whole place smells like my old man."

"Your father?"

"Yeah. It's barely here anymore, but it's his scent."

"Perhaps he came to visit your mother, then?" Kagome suggested.

Inuyasha shook his head, his mouth curling back bitterly.

"No, not my old man. He never came to see us in the court, not even once. And she wasn't his wife. She wasn't even one of his concubines. He…he wouldn't have come here," he said, his look darkening.

"But his scent is here, you said. What other reason could there be?" Kagome replied gently, her heart aching at the way he spoke of his own father.

The hanyou's gaze dropped, his eyes boring into the earth beneath him for a long moment. At last he stood, turning and starting in among the headstones.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome called, hurrying after him.

"We're here to find my mother's grave, right?" he said, not bothering to slow down for her. "Let's quit wasting time and get it over with already."

Kagome frowned, uncertain how to respond. The subject of his family was obviously a painful one for Inuyasha, and she was afraid to prod too much lest she open old wounds. For the time being she decided to hold her tongue and allow him to work through it on his own.

It did not take much to locate his mother's grave, even amongst so many others. The graves atop the hill were arranged roughly in a number of concentric circles radiating outwards with a single grave sitting directly in the center.

The headstone that marked it was by far the largest one on the hill and the only one upon which no moss had grown. Inuyasha froze at the sight of it, standing several feet away. The sharpness drained instantaneously from his face, and for a moment Kagome felt as if she were seeing him as a child. He looked vulnerable.

She placed a hand gently on his arm, wanting to offer her support in some way.

"That's her," he said unecessarily, looking for all the world like he could not take another step forward.

"I know," Kagome said gently. "Let's go see her, alright?"

Her hand slid down to grip his wrist lightly, tugging him onward. He followed along with little resistance, blinking when they reached the headstone. A small frown creased his brow as they both caught sight of the tiny kanji etched alongside the larger kanji that depicted the name of Inuyasha's mother, 'Konoe Izayoi'.

The tiny kanji, invisible from a distance, read simply: 'Beloved mate'.

Kagome glanced from the writing to Inuyasha's face, trying to gauge his reaction. His face was unreadable, though, a mercurial mix of emotions seeming to vie for dominance.

"Inuyasha…it must have been your father. Who else could have written it?" Kagome said hopefully. "He…he came for her."

Inuyasha shook his head, nearly taking a step back from the grave. She held his wrist firmly, refusing to allow him to run away from something so important.

"So he waited until she was dead!" he barked. "It took her being murdered by a band of raiders to make him come see her! Fuck that, Kagome, and fuck him! That bastard didn't deserve to be around my mother!"

He pitched forward, dropping to his knees with one clawed hand extended to scratch out the tiny message forever. Kagome gasped, reaching forward to stop him.

A flash of light blinded them both momentarily. Inuyasha fell back on his haunches, blinking rapidly to clear his vision. Kagome, on her knees beside him, did the same.

"The hell…?"

"Inuyasha," Kagome said, pointing to the ground beneath him as she regained her sight.

The earth of Izayoi's grave, just beneath Inuyasha's hand, glowed faintly. The hanyou blinked, frowning as he scooped some of the glowing earth up into his clawed hand.

Some of the soil fell away to reveal a small black pearl sitting in the center of his palm, emitting a soft white light. Kagome leaned in towards him to get a closer look at it, sensing a distinct youki besides Inuyasha's own swirling all around the small orb.

"What is it?" she murmured.

"I dunno, but it's got my old man's youki all over it," he said lowly, his gaze fixated on the small orb.

"This is your father's, as well?" Kagome asked, reaching in to tentatively pluck the jewel from his palm so that she could examine it more closely.

The glow was extinguished as soon as it made contact with her skin. Kagome frowned as she felt all of the youki recede back into the black jewel. She glanced up at Inuyasha, cocking her head curiously before pressing the jewel back into his palm. It lit up once more, the former Tennō's youki emerging to swirl around it.

"It only reacts to you," she said, looking up into his face. "Perhaps…perhaps because of your mother's blood. It seems your father left it for her, after all."

"Why bother?" Inuyasha bit out, scowling down at it. "What's some little rock after abandoning her for years?"

Kagome frowned, her heart sinking. She had suspected that his relationship with his father had been bad from the few bits and pieces that he had let slip, but she had never realized exactly how bad it was. He honestly believed that his own father had abandoned his mother and himself. She could scarcely imagine living with that kind of pain.

But, looking from the pearl sitting in his palm to the ever so carefully etched kanji on the headstone, Kagome could not honestly believe that that was the case. These were not the actions of someone who did not care.

She reached out slowly, covering the jewel in Inuyasha's palm with her own hand. His gaze shifted to her face, but she kept her own trained on their hands and the light peeking out from between them.

"You said yourself that your father had no reason to come here, right?" she said softly. "Your mother was not his wife. Nor was she one of his concubines."

"But he did come here. His scent is here, and who else would have carved those words on her grave? 'Beloved mate'. He didn't write it for others to see. He didn't make it big or grand. He wrote it for her, and for himself. He…he wrote it because that was what he felt."

"And this pearl. He left it for her, and it obviously reacts to her blood. It's filled with his youki. Don't you think…don't you think that maybe he just wanted some part of himself to be close to her, even in death?"

Kagome raised her eyes, meeting the hanyou's own and willing him to try and see things her way. To try and believe that his father had loved his mother, even if it was not in the most obvious of ways.

"Kagome..." Inuyasha said, his jaw set stubbornly against her words.

"I know that I do not understand what it was like for you growing up-how hard it must have been to grow up so close to your father and yet to have never seen him because of the circumstances," she cut him off, desperate for him to at least hear her out. "I am merely saying that I…I do not believe that loving someone is so simple a thing as merely being near them, or seeing them."

"You never saw your father, but I cannot help but feel that he saw you. Both of you. Why else would he have come here? Why else would he have named you as his heir, despite all odds?"

She held his eyes, watching as his expression slowly shifted into something reluctantly thoughtful. She curled his fingers closed around the pearl and patted his hand.

"Please think about, Inuyasha. I do not want you to suffer with this. And please talk to your mother. I am certain that she would want to hear from you. I will give you some time alone, alright?" she said, rising to stand.

She walked out to the far edge of the hill overlooking the plain, wanting to give him some time and space to say whatever he needed to say to his mother's spirit and to think about what they had found.

A small, hunched old man hobbled into her line of sight as she gazed out over the plain. He was coming from the village, making his way slowly towards one of the headstones with a pail of water in one hand and an offering of food in the other.

Kagome started down the hill towards him, intent on asking him a few questions while she could get him alone. It would be too difficult to deal with the entire village to get the answers that she wanted.

The old man stopped as he caught sight of her, the lines in his face deepening in an unwelcoming scowl. Kagome pressed forward, quickening her pace when he turned to go back to the village.

"Please, sir! Please wait just a moment!" she called after him.

"Go back to the court, miko. We don't need your kind sniffing around our village. Can't you see you've done enough damage?" he called bitterly over his shoulder.

His old joints did not allow for quick movement, however, and she easily overtook him. She came to block his path, forcing him to stop. He glared up at her from dark eyes set within the deep folds of his face.

"Please, sir, I only want to ask you a few questions. I have no intention of going back into the village right now."

The old man's mouth twisted bitterly, his eyes darting around her form. He heaved a sigh after a moment, obviously deciding that he could not outrun her. His eyes swung back to meet hers with defiant impatience.

"The graves up on the hill," she began, seeing his tacit acceptance. "Can you remember anyone ever having come to visit them to observe the rites?"

The old man scoffed, shaking his head.

"I'm sure you can see it yourself, but no one goes near those ones. Normally it'd be the job of the Konoe clan to care for 'em, but they're all gone. You'd think the court might send someone every now an' again, but obviously they don't give a damn, either. They're not ours, and they're not our responsibility. We didn' even dig the graves, so they're not ours to care for," the old man replied stubbornly.

"Wait, what do you mean you did not dig the graves?" Kagome broke in. "If you villagers did not put the Konoe clan to rest, then who…?"

"A big daiyoukai," the old man replied, stretching his arms wide to indicate its size despite the pail and food occupying his hands. "Came to fight off the raiders, he said, but he was too late by then. So he buried up the Konoe clan and ran off to track them down. Didn' look it at the time, but he musta been from the court. Never came back again, though, to visit the graves. Well, good riddance to more court nonsense."

Kagome frowned, ignoring the pointed jab at the end in favor of puzzling over the information that had just been given. Her eyes widened, two pieces clicking together in her head suddenly.

"The daiyoukai…was he an inuyoukai, by any chance?" she ventured, unable to keep the eagerness from her tone.

"Big white one," the man confirmed, though he looked wary of her sudden excitement. "Never gave a name…"

But Kagome was off and running back towards the hill as soon as the confirmation left his lips, calling a quick thanks over her shoulder as she went. She could hardly wait to tell Inuyasha, scrambling in an ungainly manner up the side of the hill.

She lost a bit of her speed at the sight of the hanyou, still kneeling before his mother's gravestone at the center of the rings of graves. His head was bowed, his hands pressed together around the pearl. He really did seem to be trying to talk to his mother.

Kagome approached slowly, reluctant to disturb him even with the information she now carried. One of his ears swiveled towards her as she neared. He raised his head to look at her, his eyes solemn. Kagome came closer, fighting the urge to reach out and stroke back his hair as she might a child.

"Did I disturb you?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

He shook his head slightly.

"No. I was just tellin' her about you anyway," he replied, his customary roughness almost entirely absent from his voice.

Kagome felt herself flush warmly, inordinately pleased to hear that he would talk to his mother about her. She pressed a hand to her cheek as if to suppress it, trying to ignore the slight fluttering in her chest as she met the hanyou's eyes.

"I-I found something out that I think you should hear," she said.

He frowned, his expression shifting into incredulity.

"I found one of the villagers alone out by the graves and wanted to ask a few questions," she answered his unspoken question, lifting her hands defensively as a hint of anger sparked in his eyes. "I wasn't in any danger, Inuyasha. It was just a little old man, all alone. He couldn't have done me harm even if he had wanted to."

He snorted derisively, shaking his head. Kagome frowned, but pressed on.

"He told me something interesting about the Konoe graves that I think you should know," she said. "The villagers did not bury the Konoe clan members. A daiyoukai did."

Inuyasha frowned, realization dawning slowly on his face.

"My old man…?"

Kagome nodded quickly, kneeling down at his side.

"I believe so. The old man said it was a big, white inuyoukai. He came here to protect the village-to protect your mother-from the raiders, but he arrived too late to stop them. He buried the clan before going to track down the raiders, the old man said. Don't you see, Inuyasha? He came here to save your mother and went after the raiders to avenge her death!" Kagome said, her eyes scanning his face intently for a reaction.

His brow furrowed deeply, his gaze dropping. After a long moment he shook his head.

"No…there's no way in the seven hells," he declared. "My mother…she wasn't his wife or mistress. The raid wasn't a big one. And even back then the Konoe were considered small fish in the court. There's no way they woulda let my old man out of the court specially to deal with the raid. They would've sent some soldiers, at best, but there's no way the Council let him outta the court for a woman who they didn't even acknowledge as being associated with him."

"Did they let you out to come protect me?" she returned pointedly, arching a brow. "Obviously he must have snuck out. Why else would you never have heard about it until now? And all of the evidence says he was here. He wanted to protect your mother so much that he was willing to defy the court to do it. He truly did love her, wife or concubine or not."

Inuyasha was silent, his eyes fixed on the ground as he tried to process this. Almost unconsciously his fist uncurled to reveal the small black pearl still glowing steadily in the center of his palm. His eyes shifted toward it, its glow reflected in them. His frown slackened slowly, the solemn, childlike look stealing over his features once more.

"I don't…I don't get it, Kagome. If he cared so much about us, why…?"

He trailed off, staring into the pearl as if it might offer him some sort of answer. Kagome bit the inside of her lip, watching him. Years of belief were not so easily discarded, after all, and his relationship with his father had obviously been almost nonexistent. How could he just suddenly accept that a man that he had barely known had loved him as his son?

Still, better that he try to work through it all now. It would be tragic if he were to go through his entire life believing that his own father had cared nothing for himself or his mother.

Kagome placed a hand lightly on his arm to get his attention. He glanced up at her, and she offered him a small smile.

"Your father loved you, Inuyasha," she said firmly, pressing his arm to emphasize her words. "I believe it, and I want you to believe it, too. You might not think so, but things like this are important. I want…I want you to be able to feel that your father loved you. I want you to be happy."

"I didn't even know him, Kagome," the hanyou said lowly. "And it's too late now. There’s no way of knowing what he thought about anything anymore."

Kagome sighed, her gaze lowering to the pearl.

"I'm sure if we could see him, he would tell you," she murmured, though she could sense she was hitting a wall with the hanyou that would not be so easily gotten past.

"Yeah," Inuyasha returned, his expression growing distant. "If we could see him…"

The glow around the jewel seemed to strengthen for a moment. Miko and hanyou both blinked.

* * *

It could have been an eternity or mere moments later that Kagome opened her eyes again. She felt as if everything around her had warped and stretched strangely, leaving her disoriented. She pressed a hand to her temple, trying to figure out why she suddenly felt so strange.

"Kagome?"

She looked up at the sound of the hanyou's voice. He sat in the same place, blinking at her with his face drawn in consternation.

"Did you feel that?" he asked. She nodded.

"What was it?" she asked. He shook his head.

"The hell if I know. All of the sudden…"

He cut himself off, ears twitching atop his head. His frown deepened.

"It's quiet," he said suddenly.

Kagome cocked her head, listening. He was right. There was not a single sound to be heard. Not the wind, not the chittering of birds. Nothing.

Her eyes met his questioningly and they both turned in unison to look around. Both froze, eyes widening.

"What is that?" Kagome gasped, scarcely able to believe what she was seeing. She brought up a hand to rub at her eyes, but the vision remained before her.

Inuyasha was silent beside her, unmoving. At length she turned to him, shaking his arm. Even that failed to draw his attention away from the sight in before them.

"Inuyasha?"

His lips moved numbly, forming words she could not catch. She leaned closer, trying to hear.

"Inuyasha? What is it?"

"My old man," he mumbled dazedly, loud enough for her to hear this time. "That's my old man."

Kagome's mouth fell open in surprise, her gaze whipping back toward the mass that had so shocked her before.

It towered above the both of them, the bones of what had obviously once been a great daiyoukai. Panels of armor still hung from its shoulders and chest, and the rusted remains of many swords still rested where they must once have pierced flesh. Great, cavernous eye sockets seemed to gaze down upon them, as if there were yet some remnant of life in the massive form.

"Your father?" she barely managed to get out, her mind working furiously. "By the kami…"

Somehow they had stumbled upon the final resting place of the great Inu no Taisho.


	15. Of Swords and Secrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our lesson for today:
> 
> -Tsushima islands: a pair of Japanese islands in the Korea Strait that have long been prominent ports for Japanese trade and home to many foreigners. Because of their distance from the mainland they were also long a spot of contention and were often beyond the reach of the rulers of Japan.
> 
> -Hijinkessō: translated as Blades of Blood (I think) in the American version, this is the attack where Inuyasha uses his own blood to create blades. Didn't really get used much in the series after he got Tessaiga.

Silence had descended upon the pair, stark and heavy. Neither knew what to do or say or even what had exactly had just occurred. The black pearl still glowed faintly in Inuyasha's hand, and Kagome found herself staring at it as if transfixed.

"…They never found my old man," came the murmur, low and hollow, that roused her from her stupor.

Inuyasha was not looking at her, but at the towering remains of what had apparently once been his father, one of the most powerful daiyoukai in all of Japan. Nor did it seem that he was speaking to her. His eyes were distant, looking back on some memory she could not see.

"What do you mean, never found?" Kagome reiterated, frowning.

He blinked slowly, a bit of the haze of remembrance clearing from his face. He shook his head.

"He wasn't in the court when he died," Inuyasha answered, his gaze lowering to the ground beneath him. "Council told everyone he'd gone out to do an inspection of the northern borders. Everyone figured he'd died trying to put down some of the youkai hordes up there.”

“They sent out a search party, but no one found the body. Everyone knew he was dead, though, 'cuz the feel of his youki had disappeared from around the Heian-kyō."

"His youki?"

"Every Tennō does it. Forms a barrier around the court. Like marking territory. Lets everyone know not to screw with your land. Disappears when you die, though," he said.

Kagome cocked her head, frowning as she tried to recall the feeling of the court.

"But I've never sensed a barrier around the court in all the time I have resided there," she said, wondering if perhaps her senses were off.

Inuyasha's frown deepened into a scowl, his gaze darkening.

"I'm only half, remember?" he bit out. "Not enough youki to create one."

"Oh…" Kagome said softly, uncertain what else to say.

"Feh," Inuyasha huffed, his shoulders jerking in a sharp shrug of dismissal. "Doesn't matter."

She bit her lip, certain that it did matter to him a great deal. Still, there would be time later to deal with that issue. For the time being they had much larger, more skeletal problems to deal with.

"Then, if no one was ever able to find your father's body before, how in the world did we happen across it?" she asked, gesturing up at the looming figure.

"The hell if I know," he replied, a hand coming up to scratch at the back of his head. "Can't even remember how we got here."

"Me neither," she said, frowning. "We were at your mother's grave and then…"

She trailed off, unable to recall anything beyond that. She looked to Inuyasha to see if he might be able to supply more.

He had taken the black pearl between two fingers and was studying it intently, a fang peeking over his bottom lip in concentration. He brought it close to his face and sniffed tentatively, brow creasing.

"I think I remember this," he said at last.

"The pearl?" Kagome asked.

He nodded slowly.

"I only saw it a few times, but…I think it belonged to my mother," he said, straining to remember. "When I was really little, I think she showed it to me. She carried it…she carried it in a special pocket inside her robes. And she said… something about how she looked at it when she wanted to feel close to my old man."

"Feel close to?" Kagome echoed thoughtfully. "Well, it was obviously given to her by your father, so…perhaps she meant it literally? It has got your father's youki in it and reacts to your mother's blood. Perhaps…perhaps your father gave it to her so that, if ever she needed him, she could get to him with ease?"

"You mean, if she needed to see my old man, she'd just…what, make a wish on this thing?" the hanyou said incredulously, holding the pearl up to eye it once more.

"Not a wish, maybe. Just…just a desire to be near him, I think. I mean, we were discussing being able to see your father right before…well, right before this," she answered, gesturing to their surroundings.

He was silent for a stretch, considering this. His expression grew heavy, perplexed. She could see some of the childlike confusion creeping back into his eyes.

"It makes sense, doesn't it?" she prodded gently. "He wanted to be near her and she wanted to be near him. The court made things complicated, but that never changed."

His gaze lifted from the pearl to meet hers. There was a frown on his face, but it had none of its usual edge to it. Kagome felt a sharp pang go through her at the sight.

"Then it was me he didn't want," he murmured, his tone an odd mixture of resentment and resignation.

He was on his feet walking and moving towards the skeleton before she could even process  
the words. She felt as if she had been struck, her eyes stinging at the raw pain that had been evident in him for just that brief moment.

"Inuyasha…" she called, her voice catching.

He either did not hear her or did not want to hear her. He continued towards the remains.

Kagome bit down punishingly on her lower lip, swallowing back her tears. Silently she berated herself for having pushed too hard.

She had thought that it would be a comfort to him, learning that his father truly had loved his mother despite how it seemed. She had never stopped to consider what that might mean for him, his father never having bothered to try and see him.

She couldn't bring herself to believe that his father hadn't loved him. But she couldn't provide him with any proof that he had, either, and Inuyasha had already lived his entire life believing that the former Tennō wanted nothing to do with him. It only made sense that he would take these new revelations as confirmation of that.

Kagome breathed a deep sigh before climbing to her feet. She jogged after the hanyou, intent on getting him to talk all of it out with her before he came to conclusions all on his own.

"Inuyasha," she called, reaching out to place a hand just above his elbow once he was within reach.

Inuyasha pulled his arm away, not bothering to look at her.

Kagome blinked, her heart sinking. She let her hand fall to her side.

"Inuyasha…I…"

"Just let it go for once, Kagome," he cut in roughly. "It ain't like I had no idea how my old man felt about me. Who'd be proud of having a half-breed for a kid? At least now I know the old bastard wasn't mistreating my mother. So just let it go."

Kagome opened her mouth. Closed it. She had no more to offer him. She bowed her head, trying to swallow back her own sadness for his sake.

"…I'm so sorry, Inuyasha," she managed at last, unable to think of anything else to say to him.

"Let's figure out where the hell we are so we can get back," Inuyasha said, as if he hadn't heard her.

Kagome's eyes darted up to his face.

"But…what about your father's body?" she ventured. "Now that we've finally found him after all these years…"

"It's sat here this long. It can rot here for the rest of eternity for all I care," he said dismissively, turning and striding off in another direction. There was a tall sand dune visible in the distance that he seemed to be heading towards.

Kagome frowned, trailing after him.

"But…can't I at least perform the final rites for him before we go? I would feel terrible just leaving him here like this."

Inuyasha stopped dead, spinning to face her. Kagome came to a stumbling halt just short of running into him.

"Cut it the fuck out, Kagome!" the hanyou barked, with a genuine anger that made her blanch. "Why do you have to poke your fucking nose into everything? I don't need you to try and fucking fix my life! So just back the hell off and deal with your own shit for once, alright?"

She gaped up at him, mortified.

Slowly her face crumpled, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. Her clenched fists shook slightly at her sides. Inuyasha felt a bit of his ire cool at the sight.

"Kagome-"

"Do not bother," she hissed, her lower lip trembling with the effort it took to keep from crying. "I understand perfectly now, Inuyasha-sama. I am sorry to have been such a bother."

She swept past him, striding with purpose towards the sand dune. Inuyasha stood looking after her, a sinking feeling in his gut.

Well, if she wanted to be pissed off, fine. As long as she stopped prodding. Kami knew she meant well-she meant well in just about every fucking thing she did-but he didn't need to hear it anymore. So what if his old man hadn't given a shit about him? It wasn't like he hadn't known that his entire life.

"Ah!"

A pained cry had him racing towards her before his mind could even process the sound. She was lying on the ground several feet away, unmoving. Inuyasha's stomach lurched sickeningly.

"Kagome!"

He slid to his knees beside her, slipping a hand beneath her shoulders to help her sit up. She let out a soft groan as he pulled her against his chest, his eyes scanning her body frantically for any sign of injury.

"Ow…" she moaned, brow creasing as her eyes fluttered open to meet his.

"What in the hell happened?" he asked, his heart still pumping erratically at the abrupt scare. Kami, he turned away for one second and…

Kagome lifted her hands to examine them, blinking at them a bit dazedly. The flesh of her palms was an angry red, blisters beginning to form. He took one of her hands carefully in his own, examining the damage. It looked painful, but superficial at worst.

"There's some sort of barrier," Kagome murmured. "I…I didn't sense it at all. I ran into it and…it must be made of some sort of youki…"

She flexed her hands tentatively, wincing as pain lanced through them. The hanyou frowned. He brought one of her hands up, thumb sliding carefully along the edge of the tender flesh. Kagome frowned up at him, a slight flush stealing over the ridges of her cheeks.

"It's not that bad, really," she muttered, trying to take her hand back. He held it fast.

"D'we have any bandages?" he asked, gesturing with his chin towards her pack that he wore slung over one of his shoulders.

"I think so," she said.

He released her hand and set her down carefully on the ground before pulling the pack from his shoulder. Kagome watched him rifle through it, feeling a bit of her previous ire return now that the shock had passed.

"Please do not trouble yourself, Inuyasha-sama," she said stiffly, struggling to stand without using her hands to lever herself up. "It will heal on its own."

A hand on her shoulder forced her back down, and Kagome glared up into his face.

"Calm down, wench, and just let me do this," he ordered, brandishing a small handful of herbs almost just under her nose. "These are the ones for burns, right?"

Her eyes nearly crossed as she attempted to examine the herbs. She frowned, her eyes slanting to meet his.

"How did you know?"

"Smells the same as the ones you used to treat that old lady in the one village we passed through," he answered with a shrug. "Hands."

Kagome's scowl returned. She pulled her hands behind her back defiantly.

"As I have already said, Inuyasha-sama, that will not be necessary."

He returned her glare with one of his own.

"Quit pouting and lemme see your hands," he growled, brandishing one of his hands expectantly.

"No," she said, unable to keep the note of petulance from her voice. “And I am not pouting.”

The hanyou stared hard at her for a long minute. She met his gaze evenly, unmoved. He huffed a sigh of resignation, muttering something under his breath.

"Sorry," he grumbled at last, the word so muffled it took her a moment to understand it.

She stared at him for a few moments, some of the edge draining slowly out of her expression. Releasing a small sigh, she shook her head.

"I didn't mean to pry into your business," she said softly. "I only wanted to help."

She held out one of her hands to him, a peace offering of sorts. He took it, pressing the herbs lightly against her burns.

"My business…is your business," he said lowly, his eyes intent on her hand as he worked. "Kami know you've made it that way since you showed up…and I-I don't completely hate it, I guess."

She blinked up at him, slightly surprised and more than a little touched at the admission. A small smile lit her face, a hand coming up to tug affectionately at one of his forelocks. He gave her an irritated glance before returning his attentions to her hand.

"Are you certain you won’t come to regret saying that?" she teased, unable to resist one last jab.

"I already regret it," he muttered, tying off the bandages on her hand. "Other hand."

She offered up her right hand obediently and watched as he proceeded to treat it with the same level of concentration. The sight of his expression as he worked, brow slightly furrowed and eyes fixed intently on the task, inspired a happiness within her that she could not entirely understand.

He tied off the bandages on her hand and looked up at her. The sight of her smile, glowing and grateful, caught him entirely off guard. He experienced a twinge of some feeling so strong that it was almost pain. He looked away hurriedly.

"The, uh, the barrier…you couldn't break it?" he asked, clearing his throat.

Kagome shook her head.

"It's too powerful for me to handle by myself, especially after I've been expending so much energy on the villages for the past few weeks," she explained, turning her attention back towards the unexpected hindrance. "I would venture to guess that the barrier is the reason no one was able to find your father. I imagine that anything inside the barrier is invisible from the outside and it's difficult to even sense the energy of the barrier if you're not looking for it."

Inuyasha frowned.

"Why would the old man go to that much trouble to keep his corpse from being found?"

"I don't think it was him," Kagome said slowly, her brow furrowing as she tried to recall. "The energy of the barrier…I only felt it for a moment when I connected, but it did not feel the same as the youki of the black pearl."

"Then some other youkai put up the barrier after he died?" Inuyasha asked incredulously.

Kagome shrugged, shaking her head.

"I suppose so."

Their eyes met, the unspoken 'why' of the matter passing between them. His eyes shifted towards the skeleton that loomed a short distance away.

"Do you know of any youkai who would have wanted to protect the sanctity of your father's body that much?" Kagome asked.

Inuyasha shook his head slowly, gaze lingering over the swords which protruded from various parts of the remains.

"No way," he said. "If they'd been concerned with protecting sanctity or whatever, wouldn't they at least've bothered to clean up the body a little? And why leave him out here? If the youkai was so loyal, why not bring him back to the court?"

"Then, what…?"

"Whoever the hell it was, they didn't want the body to be found," he said firmly. "I don't know much about my old man, but I know he was a tough old bastard. I never understood how a border inspection coulda been the end for him, even if he was alone and caught off guard. But, if someone planned it, it makes sense that they'd wanna hide the body to keep anyone from ever looking into it."

"You believe his death was planned, then?"

"I just don't think taking down a youkai like my old man coulda been a spur of the moment thing. And you said that villager said my old man went after the raiders, right?"

Kagome nodded, watching his face curiously. She could almost see him piecing fragments together in his mind.

"My old man…he died about a month after word came to the court about the raid on the Konoe clan. I always just figured it was a coincidence, but if he really did go after the raiders, who's to say it didn't take him a month to track them down?"

"There were supposed to be several ceremonies held the month after the raids to honor the Konoe clan, presided over by my old man, but all of them were cancelled by the Council. No one in the court knew why. And if he really did sneak outta the court, the Council would've wanted to cover it up."

"He had a reputation for doing whatever the hell he wanted, and the Council always tried to cover it up to keep order. The border inspection always sounded like a load of crap to me, anyway. It ain't exactly the sort of thing the Tennō goes off to do alone, and without anyone knowing about it except the Council."

"Then you think your father was killed by the same raiders who killed your mother?" Kagome asked, frowning as she attempted to follow the line of his thoughts.

"I think the raiders meant to kill my old man and killing my mother was just a way to get at him," the hanyou said, his eyes darkening.

Kagome's eyes widened.

"You…Don't you think that's a lot to assume, Inuyasha?" 

The hanyou shook his head. He met her eyes, his own fairly burning as he followed the trail of his own thought like a hound that had caught the scent.

"Like I said, there's no way in hell some band of nobodies just happens to take out the old man. And the Konoe clan, they were a minor clan at best. Their residence couldn't have been that great, and I doubt they had anything there worth goin' through all that trouble to steal. So why them?"

"Unless they knew about how close your mother and father were," Kagome filled in, warming slowly to the idea. "They attacked knowing she was there, and that he would come alone if she were in trouble because the court didn't approve of them. But why the month long gap between their deaths?"

"They would've wanted him as far away from the court as possible-the further he was, the less chance of anyone comin' to help him or seeing the raiders who were trying to off him without attracting any attention. So they spend a month letting him track them as far away from the court as possible," he replied, sounding more and more certain by the moment.

"An ambush," Kagome said thoughtfully. "They drew him out and attacked him when they knew they had the advantage."

Abruptly Inuyasha stood. He proffered a hand to her, gesturing for her to get up.

"C'mon," he said.

She offered up her forearm, avoiding her burned hands, and he pulled her lightly to her feet before starting off toward the bones. She trailed after him.

"Inuyasha, what are we doing?"

"There's something about the body that whoever the hell murdered the old man didn't want anyone to see. We're gonna find it," he replied firmly.

"And you're…alright with that?" she ventured delicately.

He glanced back at her out of the corner of his eye.

"Even if he didn't give a damn about me, he didn't deserve this. It's one thing to die in battle, and another to be murdered in cold blood. And if these really are the same bastards that killed my mother, they deserve everything that's comin' to 'em when I track 'em down," he said darkly.

Silent admiration welled within her. He concealed it alarmingly well, but when it came down to it Inuyasha had more heart than most. She quickened her stride to walk alongside him.

"What are we looking for, then?" she said.

"Hell if I know," he replied.

"Anything and everything it is, then," she returned dryly.

They reached the foot-quite literally-of the towering frame of Inuyasha's father. Kagome bit her lip, craning her head back to look up at it.

"This might prove to be a bit difficult," she murmured, uncertain where to even begin.

Inuyasha knelt down before her, offering up his back.

"Get on," he said. "It'll take forever if you try to do it on your own."

Kagome situated herself on his back, yelping slightly when he stood and hitched her up so that she rested more closely against his back. She gripped his shoulders, her face warming faintly as it always did at the close contact. 

"Hold on," he said, scarcely a second before launching them both upward.

Kagome felt her stomach drift upward out of her body, marveling silently at the ease and grace with which he moved beneath her. She bit her lip, fighting to keep from laughing at the sudden thrill.

He alighted on one of the lower ribs after a few leaps, a handful of oversized arrows protruding a few feet away.

Kagome slid down off of his back, balancing carefully as she walked over to examine the arrows.

Proportionally the shafts were much shorter than those of her own arrows. They also appeared to be made out of bamboo, the feathers at the base unfamiliar to her. She knelt down, stretching out a hand to see if she couldn't pry one of the arrows loose to inspect it further.

Inuyasha's hand around her wrist stopped her short. She glanced up at him questioningly.

"It's faint, but it smells like shōki," he said by way of an explanation.

"Shōki…" she murmured to herself, storing that piece of information away. "Well, if they thought ahead enough to coat their arrows in shōki then they must have been expecting a powerful opponent. These arrows…they don't look like any I've ever seen before, either. I've never seen arrows crafted from bamboo."

He frowned, taking this in silently. After a moment he knelt and offered his back once more. Kagome climbed on and they continued onward, making their way up and around the towering figure in leaps and bounds.

They stopped once more near one of the swords that Kagome had observed earlier. It was also exceptionally large, obviously meant to be wielded by a youkai, but that was not the only thing unusual about it.

The blade was double edged, coming to a sharply pointed tip. Admittedly Kagome knew little of swords, but she had never seen its like before in the court. It was as anomalous as the arrows.

The picture etched into the grip of the sword caught her attention, as well. It appeared to be a dragon, hooded and lacking any legs like a serpent. It was carved roughly, with choppy strokes.

Her brow furrowed, some faint memory tugging at the back of her mind. She had seen it before somewhere. She struggled to recall, but the memory danced just beyond her reach.

"I've never seen this kinda blade before," Inuyasha said, confirming her suspicions. "It doesn't look like any of ours."

"The picture carved into the grip looks familiar," Kagome said. "I can't recall where I've seen it before, though."

The hanyou remained a moment longer, staring hard at the sword as if to force it to offer up some sort of answer. At last he shook his head with a huff, launching them upward once more.

The body was littered with the remnants of Inuyasha's father's last fight. Swords and arrows, of the same odd make, protruded everywhere. Deep and numerous scores on the bone bore witness to the strength and number of his enemy. They had attacked in what must have been no less than a swarm, and they had been merciless.

The pair reached the skull without having found much that provided any real answers. The massive jaws of the former Tennō gaped wide, fangs bared as if in one last great howl.

Something glittered in the midst of that gaping maw and Kagome frowned. She squinted, shifting on Inuyasha’s back as she tried to get a better look at whatever it was.

"Inuyasha, do you see that?" she asked, pointing over the hanyou's shoulder. "Inside of his mouth."

Inuyasha moved them a few steps closer, straining his eyes down into the darkness of the gaping cavity.

"What?" he said.

Kagome slid down off of his back, moving in closer to inspect it. Sure enough numerous silk-like threads were intertwined across the opening, glinting faintly in her vision.

"Can't you see them?" she called back to him, one hand reaching out toward the threads. "Right here-"

She gasped, nearly stumbling backwards as light flared through the threads. For just an instant they were illuminated, the spider-web pattern and ghostly spider sitting at the center of it becoming apparent.

Inuyasha was beside her before she could blink, a hand on her back to keep her from falling. He scowled, pushing her back behind him for good measure.

"What the hell is that?" he asked, though he could no longer see the thing.

"Some sort of barrier," Kagome replied, peeking over his shoulder to get a look. "It looked like a spider's web. It's difficult to tell, but it might be made of the same youki as the barrier surrounding this place. Why here, though? If there's already a barrier protecting this place…"

"The back-up plan," Inuyasha replied lowly. "Whatever the hell it was that they didn't want to be found, it's probably down in there."

"I-Inside?" she said, blanching slightly at the thought.

It was one thing to hop about the body like a pair of fleas. It was entirely another to go poking around inside of it. Things were beginning to get a bit sacrilegious for her tastes.

"You think you can break that barrier?" he interrupted her thoughts.

"Yes, I think so," Kagome replied, eyeing the threads. "It's relatively small, and there's not nearly as much youki in it as the barrier surrounding here. But, Inuyasha, is it really alright to…?"

He turned a dry look on her, one dark brow lifted critically.

"We're standin' on a pile of bones, and this is what you flinch at?" he said.

She frowned, her lower lip protruding petulantly. She pushed lightly at one of his arms, trying to move him out of her way.

"Fine, then. Move so that I can break it," she said. "You have to admit it's a bit grotesque, though."

He stood aside and she pulled her bow from its place inside her quiver. She restrung it with a practiced motion and drew an arrow, notching it and leveling it at the place she remembered seeing the spider's outline.

She drew her arm back in a smooth motion, holding for a long moment to focus her energies directly into the tip. She released, the arrow flying true and straight to connect solidly.

The outline of the spider flared once more as her arrow made contact. Sparks flared, crackling between the two as the opposing energies clashed. Kagome blinked, a flash of memory sparking simultaneously.

The arrow pierced, shattering the barrier in a flash of blue light. Both spider and web vanished.

Inuyasha moved forward, intent on entering. Kagome did not follow.

Realizing he stood alone, Inuyasha turned back to order her to hurry up. He paused at the look on her face.

She stood with her bow still held in position, though her arms sagged slightly. Her eyes were unfocused.

"Kagome?" he called.

She blinked, presence returning to her face. Her grey eyes swung up to meet his own, the turbulence of her thoughts lighting them in that strangely mercurial way.

"That spider," she said slowly. "It keeps appearing everywhere. In that little boy, at my village, and now here."

Inuyasha frowned.

"You sure it's the same one?" he asked.

She shook her head, her gaze sinking.

"The one in the little boy and at my village…I'm certain those two were the same. They had the exact same energy. This one…the youki has been here for years. It's much harder to tell."

"But at the village the spider youkai said something to me. I was dazed and it didn't make any sense at the time, but…I think it may have mentioned your father's death. It was vague, but here's the mark again. Don't you think it's a bit too much of a coincidence?"

Inuyasha's face darkened, the line of his jaw tightening.

"Then the ones who did all this…"

"Are still in the court," Kagome finished grimly. "Whatever they've been planning for all these years, they're not done yet."

"Great," the hanyou growled, just managing to keep from slamming his fist into one of the bones. "Just fucking great! One more thing we've gotta worry about. Can't we catch a fucking break already?"

Kagome sighed, unstringing her bow and sliding it back into its place in her quiver. Silently she shared his frustration, biting the inside of her cheek. Things never seemed to get any easier.

But it wouldn't do to give in to despair, she reminded herself. So she took a deep breath and resituated the quiver on her shoulder, starting towards the hanyou.

"At least we know to be on our guard now," she said. "For now let's just focus on the problem at hand."

She gestured into the darkness before them expectantly. Inuyasha snarled something under his breath, upper lip curling back as he fought the urge to lash out.

He knew she was trying to be practical, but she just didn't seem to get it. It wasn't just that this was one more obstacle to overcome. It was her, too. One more thing to threaten her life. One more thing to test his sanity.

Managing just barely to swallow back his anger, he swung around and squatted down to offer up his back once more.

"Get on," he said, a bit more roughly than he intended.

Kagome frowned, but climbed on without comment.

The hanyou made a small leap, landing nimbly atop one of the massive fangs. Two sets of eyes peered down into the seemingly endless darkness.

"Should we light a torch first?" Kagome asked apprehensively.

"I can see just fine," Inuyasha said, before launching them down into the darkness.

Kagome muffled a shriek, her arms winding tightly around his neck. She couldn't see a thing, not even the hanyou she clung to so tightly. It was a bizarre sensation, falling through absolutely nothing. It felt as if her stomach was trying to escape her body through her throat.

"Inuyasha," she said, uncertain if her own voice would even make a sound in the muffling darkness.

"Huh?" came the reply, reassuring despite its ineloquence.

"Can you see where we'll land?" she asked, peering vainly in the direction she assumed was downwards.

"Yeah, it's comin'. Hold on."

A few moments later she felt the impact, his legs bending beneath her. The normal feeling of pressure, weightiness, returned and she sighed in relief.

Inuyasha squatted down and she slid off of his back, wobbling uncertainly in the darkness. A hand pressed against her back steadied her.

"Hold on," she murmured, raising one of her injured hands above her head.

A little bit of concentration sparked a small ball of blue light in her hand, just enough to dimly illuminate their surroundings. And to throw into sharp relief the face of the hanyou standing a bit too close to her.

He flinched back from the ball of light that had been mere inches from his face.

"Watch it with that thing!" he snapped, a hand coming up to check that his nose wasn't singed.

"Sorry," she murmured. "Didn't realize you were so close."

"Yeah, yeah," he huffed. "Let's just find what we're lookin' for and get the hell out of here, alright?"

She nodded, turning in a slow circle to see if she could spot anything. For the most part there were only solid walls of bone on every side. Her light skimmed over something anomalous for an instant and she paused, turning back.

"Inuyasha, there," she called, pointing towards it.

The bones in one corner seemed to have warped to form an altar of sorts, a raised dais into which was thrust a sword.

Kagome crept closer to examine it. The sword looked rather old, the wrapping on the grip frayed and the blade nicked in various places.

"What is this?" she murmured skeptically to herself, half-turning to see if there was anything else of prominence to be seen.

She caught sight of Inuyasha standing just to her right, his eyes fixed on the dais. His expression was oddly serious.

"Inuyasha?"

He cast her a glance out of the corner of his eye, but his gaze quickly returned to the sword.

"It's his sword. The old man's sword," he said.

Kagome blinked, her brow furrowing slightly in disbelief as she turned back to look at it.

"But it's so small," she said, trying to imagine the thing in the hands of the great inuyoukai. It would have been nothing more than a toothpick to him.

"It changed when it was in his hands," the hanyou said, his eyes distant. "It was legendary. Passed down from Tennō to Tennō. The old man had it re-forged outta one of his own fangs when he inherited it. Could slay a hundred youkai with one swing."

There was a sort of reverence in his face that she had never seen there before.

"So it was a mark of the Tennō-sama's right to rule," Kagome said thoughtfully. "And it was lost along with your father."

Inuyasha nodded.

"Then this is what they didn't want to be found. They weren't only trying to hide the fact that they'd killed your father. They didn't want the sword found, either. You said it's legendary. It would have given too much power to the next ruler," she said, thinking her way through it all aloud.

"Then why didn't they just take the sword?" Inuyasha said. "They coulda had that power for themselves."

She frowned, not having considered that.

"…I don't know," she admitted. "But it's the only thing down here, isn't it?"

"I guess," he replied, glancing at the emptiness around them.

"Then go get it already," she said, gesturing towards the dais.

"What?"

"The sword. Go get it," Kagome repeated.

"The sword is for full youkai. In my hands it'd be nothing but a hunk of rusted metal," the hanyou protested.

Kagome frowned, sensing something more to it than just that. There was no way something that small would keep him from taking the sword after they had come this far.

"Do you not want your father's sword?" she ventured.

The hanyou's gaze dropped. 

"It's not that," he said lowly. "He wouldn't have wanted me to have it."

Her heart sank.

She glanced up at the sword and made a quick decision. She turned and started toward the dais, hopping up onto it and going straight for the sword.

"Kagome?"

"I refuse to let you leave here without this, Inuyasha," she said stubbornly, wrapping her bandaged hands around the grip. "You are wrong about this. I know your father would have wanted you to have it. I just know it!"

She tugged upward with all of her might, ignoring the burning of her hands. The muscles in her back and arms pulled and strained for long moments, but the sword stuck fast. Her hands slid from the grip and she stood breathing hard, scowling down at the sword.

"Kagome, cut it out! I don't want the fucking sword!" Inuyasha called angrily.

She shook her head, repositioning her throbbing hands around the sword's grip. She planted her feet firmly once more and pulled, straining with all of her might.

Her hands burned terribly, the wounds chafing beneath her bandages. She bit her lip to keep from making a sound, but a slight whimper slipped out.

Hands were on her shoulders almost instantly, tugging her away.

"Would you cut it out, you moron? You're hurting yourself," Inuyasha snapped.

"I…can't get it...out," she panted in return. "It's…stuck."

He groaned, pressing her lightly aside. He hesitated for a moment before stepping up to the sword.

"You want the sword so bad?" he groused. "Fine. Let's get the fucking sword so we can get out of here already."

The moment his hand made contact with the sword's grip there was a palpable pulse of energy, travelling up the length of the blade into the grip and up through his arm. Inuyasha’s entire body began to pulse in time with the blade, like the beating of a heart.

Kagome watched, eyes widening, as the youki of the father flowed up from the blade to wrap around the son as if in an embrace. In turn Inuyasha's own youki was pulled forth to wrap around the blade, sinking into the metal to become a part of it.

She realized as she watched the blade slide easily from the bone in which it was encased that this was why the sword had not been taken. It was meant for Inuyasha. It would be useless to anyone else.

Silence stretched between them as they both gazed at the sword. Inuyasha looked slightly awed, uncertain, the blade in his hand both foreign and familiar. Kagome watched him, wondering if he would see the blade's acceptance of him for what it was-the ultimate sign of his father's approval.

A low hissing interrupted both of their thoughts. Kagome turned this way and that, trying to find the source. The scent of decay caught her nose and her stomach lurched sickeningly at the flash of memory that hit.

"Shōki," she breathed, hardly able to get the word out. "Shōki! It's filling up the room!"

But the hanyou was already at her side, draping his haori over her head and wrapping it tightly about her much smaller frame. The sword was tucked into the tie around his hip and he swung her up into his arms.

"Keep that on," he ordered, launching them upwards as the shōki began to close in around their place on the dais. "I'll get us out of here."

But even as he spoke the poisonous clouds were swirling up around them, billowing in from every level.

"Hold your breath!" he barked, tugging the edge of his haori down over her face. Not before she caught sight of the shōki beginning to eat away at the flesh on his hands and face, though.

She cried out, trying to push at least one hand free of the haori he'd trapped her in so that she could purify some of the poison around him. He held her fast, though, knowing it would melt flesh and bone the moment it made contact with her.

He gritted his teeth, continuing to bound doggedly upward despite the patches of his flesh he could feel melting and bubbling. One glance told him that the poison was beginning to eat away at Kagome’s hakama, tabi, and zori. His heart jerked in his chest, spurring him onward faster than before. He at least had to get her out.

A light appeared, signaling that their exit was just ahead. His feet connected with a rib and one last great push had them sailing out Inu no Taisho's gaping mouth.

He allowed them to plummet downward, falling the length of the body before landing lightly at the foot. An elbow from the thrashing woman in his arms caught him on the chin before he had much time to feel relief.

He scowled, setting her down a safe distance away before whipping the haori off of her head. She blinked for a moment before lunging at him.

Inuyasha braced himself for an attack, but instead her hands settled gently on the sides of his face. He opened his eyes warily and was greeted by the sight of her tearful face, her expression anguished. He winced. He would have preferred the attack.

"Look at you! You're burned all over!" she cried, her hands trailing from his face down to his hands. "Why in the world would you…? I could've at least purified some of it!"

"It would've burned your hand off, idiot," he said, though his words lacked any real force. "I'm hanyou. I can take it. It's healing already, see?"

He held up one of his hands for her to inspect, the flesh at the edges of a hole in his palm already beginning to mend itself.

Kagome stared at the proffered hand for a moment before her face crumpled, frustrated tears flowing even more quickly down her face. She cradled his hand gently between both of her own, her hands shaking slightly.

"Don't you ever do something like that again!" she managed to choke out. "I felt so helpless! I-I thought you were going to die! What would I do…what would I do if you…?"

He gazed down at her, at a loss. It was almost frightening how deeply it seemed to affect her. Something tugged in his chest, his hand moving to touch her damp cheek gingerly. He leaned in to say something, anything, to take that look off of her face.

A resounding crash jolted them both back into the present. Inuyasha only just managed to throw them both clear as a fragment of melted bone came crashing down.

"Kami, Inuyasha, your father's body…" Kagome breathed, her eyes widening.

The shōki was quickly eating through bone and armor, seeping through the cracks and out towards them once more. The once great form of Inu no Taisho was quickly collapsing in on itself.

"No time for that," he said, ignoring a sharp pang in his gut at the sight. "We need to get outta here now."

"I can't break the barrier," Kagome said, eyes wide.

"We’ll figure it out," he growled, snatching her up and making a run for the barrier. The shōki was closing in quickly, rolling from the body in thick clouds.

He set her aside as they reached the barrier, cocking an arm back and slamming his fist into it as hard as he could manage. Not even a spark.

Kagome bit her lip, her gaze shifting from his vain efforts to budge the barrier to the rapidly approaching clouds of poison. She stepped in to cover the hanyou's back, drawing her bow and an arrow from her quiver.

She concentrated on purifying any of the shōki that came near enough to be dangerous to them, realizing with a sinking feeling that she was running low on arrows. Out of the corner of her eye she could see the hanyou still pummeling his fists vainly against the barrier.

"Inuyasha, please hurry! I haven't got many arrows left," she called, firing off another one into a plume of creeping shōki on their left. Three arrows left.

He paused, glancing wildly from the shōki closing in on all sides to the arrows in Kagome's quiver. The barrier wasn't budging, but even his haori wouldn't protect her for long once they were completely immersed in the stuff. He needed to get them through now or she didn't stand a chance.

He dug his claws into one of the wounds in his hands, gratified at the blood that welled up. He soaked his claws in it before leaping up, dragging them down the length of the barrier.

"Hijinkessō!"

Sparks flared where his claws made contact, the barrier crackling all around him. But it remained solid, immovable.

"One arrow left, Inuyasha!" Kagome called, her voice strung tight. The shōki was creeping in on all sides, mere feet away from her now.

Inuyasha snarled, desperation rising quickly within him. He had to protect her. 

A pulse resounded against his hip, echoing throughout his body. It was the rusty old blade again, calling his youki to rise.

Without thought he drew it, gripping it with both hands and raising it before him. The pulsing quickened, a flash of light sliding along the blade.

When the light dimmed the rusted blade was no more. It was a sword bigger in size than himself, worthy of being called his father's fang. It was his sword.

Squaring his feet, he raised the blade over his head. With the force of his desperation, he brought the sword down against the barrier.

For a long moment the sword connected and stuck, sparks flying wildly as its youki fought against the youki of the barrier. Slowly it began to pierce through, sliding downward to cut a narrow opening.

"Kagome!" he yelled. "Go!"

She swung around, making a dash for the opening just as the shōki began to reach her. She nearly tumbled through, Inuyasha diving through just behind her as the barrier sealed itself once more.

They both sat panting and dazed in the midst of the sand that they had emerged upon, waves lapping against the shore in a steady rhythm just feet away from them. The final resting place of Inuyasha's father was invisible once more, for all the world as if it did not even exist.

Kagome felt a sharp pang of sadness, thinking of the way in which Inuyasha's father's body had been desecrated. Silently she vowed to hold her own small ceremony for him once they returned to the court.

She glanced over at the hanyou who had just saved them both. He was staring at the rusted blade in his hands as if he could not quite believe it existed.

"Inuyasha?" she said softly.

He looked up at her, lifting the blade for her to see.

"It transformed for me," he said, as if he needed some sort of confirmation that it had actually happened.

"It's your sword, Inuyasha," she returned with a small smile. "Your father must have meant for you to have it. And you just saved both of our lives with it."

His eyes slid once more along the blade, an incredulous grin tilting up one corner of his mouth.

"Yeah," he said softly. "I guess so."

"Oi! You two!"

They both turned at the sudden call. A middle-aged man carrying a large net slung over his shoulder stood on a sand dune just above where they both sat. His skin was deeply tanned and weathered.

"You look lost," he called, eyeing their clothing. "Need some help?"

"Where are we?" Kagome called back.

The man frowned, the question obviously a strange one.

"You're on Tsushima," he replied. "What, you sail to the wrong island?"

The hanyou and miko exchanged a look.

"We're on an island," she said quietly to him.

"We're on a trade port," he said, his expression darkening rapidly. "My old man was killed on a trade port."

And in that moment they both realized that their problem extended much farther than just Japan.

Another country had been involved in the assassination of the previous Tennō.


	16. Of Homecomings and Heartaches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our history lesson for today:
> 
> -hashi: chopsticks. And yes, it can also mean bridge when it's written with different kanji. I think I’ve already used this term several times before.
> 
> -I'm sure this will be apparent to most of you, but I just wanted to note that this is the point at which I will really begin to alter the events of the Heian period for the purpose of my story. Not to say that I've been strictly faithful up until this point, but the real divergence begins here. I won't go into detail and spoil it, but I'm sure it will be obvious what I'm talking about and the effects will continue on into future chapters. So please don't take what I've written as a reflection of anything that actually occurred historically.

It was two days before they could catch a ship heading back to the mainland. The fisherman who had found them along the shore, while initially bemused at their disorientation, proved to be quite kind and helped them to find a ship as well as an inn to stay at until they could depart.

They spent the two days, at Inuyasha's urging, examining the ports around Tsushima. Numerous trade ships were docked in the harbors, most of them either Chinese or Korean.

Inuyasha explained to her that Tsushima had long stood outside the control of the Tennō, separated as it was from the rest of Japan both physically and in terms of its composition. Many foreigners had taken up residence on the island, moving it even further outside the Tennō's authority.

It made sense then that Inuyasha's father had been lured all the way out to the island by the raiders. There was no one there to come to his aid and it was the last place anyone would think to search for the Tennō's body.

As to the involvement of an outside party in his father's death, Inuyasha said his bets were on China. His father's relations with the Chinese Emperor had always been strained at best and the man was eager to expand his empire. Japan was a prime target and China had the resources at its disposal to launch an attack if they chose.

But someone within the court, someone who had been close enough to know about the relationship between Inuyasha's mother and father, had to have been present to orchestrate the entire thing. And if what Kagome had heard from the spider youkai truly was connected, they were still very much present.

Both agreed that it was in their best interest to return to the court as quickly as possible. Kagome had already placed protection around several of the villages around hers, and she feared what might happen-what might have already happened-in their extended absence.

The ship they boarded took nearly four days to reach its destination at a small port in Matsue. Kagome was fairly certain that Inuyasha did not sleep a single night while they were on board and chided him for it, telling him that he would surely fall ill if he failed to take care of his own body. He merely brushed her off, huffing something about hanyou not getting sick like humans.

Apparently sea-sickness was another issue altogether, though, as she observed him hanging over the side of the ship more than once looking quite ill. She refrained from making any comment, knowing well enough that it would only irritate him.

He was obviously anxious over the delay. She felt much the same. She often caught him gripping the hilt of his newly acquired sword tightly, his gaze distant and troubled. She wondered if his concern was for the past or the future. Perhaps it was both.

Kagome often wished she could bring herself to talk with him about all that had happened, beyond merely pragmatic speculation on the circumstances of his father's murder. After all, he had just discovered not only a connection between his father and mother that he had never thought existed, but also that that same connection had led to the both of them being killed.

She could never quite bring herself to broach the subject. So she remained silent on that count, allowing him to take his own time to sort through it while staying close to offer her support.

When they finally docked in Matsue's harbor, they did not waste any time in starting off toward the capital. Thankfully they were not far from it. It took only a day and a half or so for Inuyasha to get them there, though they did not stop to rest more than an hour or so in all that time.

As the walls of the Heian-kyō at last came into sight, both breathed a bit easier to see that it appeared none the worse than when they had departed. Guards stood posted at the western gate as they approached.

"Everything seems to be alright," Kagome said tentatively.

"Yeah, we'll see about that," he grumbled in response.

He let her down from his back as they reached the guards, steadying her with a hand around her upper arm as she wobbled. Her legs felt weak after such a long period of disuse.

Inuyasha pulled a clan seal from inside his robes, flashing it at the guards who obviously had no idea what exactly their Tennō looked like. They were allowed inside without question. Kagome guessed he carried the seal of a prominent clan to keep himself from being identified.

"I need to go to the Dairi to see Kikyou," Inuyasha said as soon as they were safely inside. "She's been covering for me this whole time. She's probably wondering where in the seven hells we are by now."

"Shall I come with you?" Kagome asked.

"No," Inuyasha said, a bit sharply. Kagome blinked.

"She's bound to be pissed at how long I've been gone. I said I'd be back quick. Better that I deal with her alone," he explained.

"Oh…alright," Kagome said, feeling a bit disappointed somehow.

"Look, go see your friends. Let 'em know you're not dead or anything," he urged gruffly, flapping a shooing hand at her.

Kagome's eyes widened as she realized that she had not even said so much as a farewell to Miroku or Sango. She had taken off in a complete panic when she had heard about what was happening near her village. The last time she had seen either of them had been at the court gathering that Sango had planned.

"Oh, no," she gasped softly, her heart sinking in her chest. "I did not tell them a thing before I left."

"Then go tell them now, idiot," he reiterated.

She nodded, more to herself than to him, before turning on her heel to go. She needed to go to them as soon as possible to try and make amends for having been such an awful friend.

"Oi, I'll call for you when it's all settled," Inuyasha called after her.

"Alright," Kagome called back, tossing a wave in his general direction before quickening her pace toward the Tachibana residence.

Absently she noticed that the court seemed rather quiet. It was mid-afternoon, normally a time when the courtiers would be out strolling after the afternoon meal, but she did not encounter a soul on her way to the residence.

The guards at the gate of the Tachibana residence seemed surprised at the sight of her, but allowed her in without question. The servant who greeted her at the door informed her that Sango had been very worried about her ever since she had learned that she had gone out of the court shortly after falling ill.

She asked Kagome to wait for a moment while she went to inform Sango of her arrival.

Kagome worried her lower lip anxiously as she waited in the entryway, wondering how upset the noblewoman would be with her. At least she seemed to have found out that she had left the court, but she had done so so shortly after falling ill and had not even stopped to explain her reasons for leaving to her friends. Truly she had been terrible to them, even though they had always treated her so kindly.

A loud, quickly approaching series of thumps stirred her from her guilt-filled reverie. Her eyes only had an instant to process the blur of color that swung around the corner into the entryway before a solid weight slammed into her.

"Kagome-chan!"

Warm, slim arms banded about her, squeezing the remaining breath from the already startled miko. She only barely managed to remain standing, supporting both her own weight and the weight of the nearly hysterical taiji-ya clinging to her.

"Thank the kami you're alright!" Sango exclaimed, releasing her death grip only to take Kagome's face tightly between her hands. "Look how pale you are, though! Like you haven't slept in days. Oh, but at least you're alive and you're back. I thought…I thought…"

She bit her lip and shook her head hard, as if she could not quite bear to give voice to her imaginings. Kagome blinked up into her face, feeling sympathetic tears well in her own eyes.

"I'm sorry," she said in a small voice.

"Don't you ever do that to me again," Sango said sharply, her gaze locking with Kagome’s. Kagome nodded, feeling small.

Sango sniffled, her expression softening. She pulled a small silk handkerchief from the inside of one of her trailing sleeves, using it first to daintily clean Kagome's face and then her own.

"Let's go sit somewhere and you can explain everything to me, alright?" Sango suggested.

Kagome nodded once more. The older woman took her hand, leading her past a group of servants who had gathered to watch the unusual scene. A warning glance from Sango scattered them, each moving off quickly to attend to their duties.

Sango led her out into the Tachibana gardens around the back of the residence. It was fairly empty there as many members of Sango's clan were out on assignment once more.

Sango led them to a secluded corner where a small bench sat overlooking a frozen pond. They both settled on the bench and there was silence for a long moment. Sango held her hand tightly.

"Where is Miroku-sama?" Kagome asked at length, recovering her voice.

"He has been worried, as well. The last time I saw him we discussed going out after you. With all that has been happening, though, it was difficult to obtain permission to leave," Sango replied.

"Happening?" Kagome echoed, shifting to look at her.

A small frown, almost a wince, twinged across Sango's face, though she attempted to hide it by turning away. A pang of worry darted through Kagome's stomach.

"Sango-sama?"

"You were going to tell me what happened out there," Sango hedged.

Kagome frowned, the pang sharpening to a jolt.

"Sango-sama," she said more firmly, squeezing the hand wrapped around her own. "I know I have been an awful friend to you, and for that I cannot apologize enough. And I will tell you everything, down to the last detail. But if something has been happening here I need to know."

She met the older woman's eyes pleadingly. Sango frowned, her gaze dropping to their linked hands.

"You just returned, Kagome-chan. You look exhausted. Won't you just rest, just for a bit, before you leap into things once more?" Sango asked softly.

"I can't rest knowing something is wrong in the court, especially not after abandoning my duties here," Kagome pressed anxiously.

"No one can blame you for wanting to be there for your family, Kagome-chan," Sango said, then sighed. "Alright. I promise I will tell you, if you will promise to remain here and rest for the remainder of the night. No acting on anything until the morning."

Kagome hesitated, weighing this. She nodded slowly.

"I promise," she said. "Please tell me."

Sango sighed, her expression still discontented. She turned her gaze out onto the frozen pond, seeming to gather her thoughts for a moment.

"There was…an incident a few days after your departure for your village," she began carefully. "A branch of the Taira residence was broken into. Some of the clan's valuables were stolen and a member of the clan was injured when he caught the thieves trespassing."

Sango hesitated, her eyes darting to Kagome's face and then away once more. Kagome squeezed her hand, urging her silently to continue.

"The injured clansman identified the thieves," she resumed. "The future Empress sentenced them, as the Tennō-sama has gone into a religious seclusion for a time to seek the guidance of the kami. Both of the thieves…were publicly executed."

Kagome's eyes widened.

"That's…barbaric," she breathed, horrified. "How can public execution be the punishment for stealing?"

"I wish that were the end of it," Sango said grimly. "The thieves…they were not members of the court. They were from the outside. Ever since the robbery all of the courtiers have been up in arms about the presence of outsiders in the court, from the servants to…to you and Miroku-sama. I believe they are beginning to resent that the Tennō-sama has allowed for the presence of outsiders of common birth."

Kagome felt the blood drain from her face. She blinked, struggling to comprehend.

"Who were they?" she asked, dread knotting tightly in the pit of her stomach. "The thieves-who were they?"

Sango grimaced, and Kagome knew that that was exactly the question that she had wanted to avoid. She hesitated for a long moment, her gaze fixed on her lap. Kagome waited, feeling vaguely ill.

"They were among those I hired for the gathering to welcome my father and brother back into the court," she sighed at last. "That is part of the reason why the courtiers are so upset with the Tennō-sama. The incident has left a stain upon the memory of the gathering."

Bright green eyes and a mop of red hair flashed through Kagome's mind. She thought she might be ill. Her hand trembled within the confines of Sango's and the other woman looked up, alarmed.

"Kagome-chan?"

"Kitsune," she said, her voice cracking on the word. "Were they…were the thieves kitsune?"

"A couple, husband and wife," Sango replied, leaning in towards her concernedly. "Kagome-chan, you didn't know them, did you?"

Kagome pressed a trembling hand to her face.

"They had a son," she said. "They had a little boy. And now…and now who does he have? Kami, Sango, they killed his parents…"

Sango placed a hand on her shoulder, but Kagome scarcely felt it. That cheerful little boy with whom she had played had had his parents stripped from him in an instance. He might even have been forced to witness their deaths. All over something as petty as thievery.

"I have to go find him," Kagome murmured, more to herself than to the other woman. "I can't just leave him."

She made to stand, but Sango's iron grip on her shoulder forced her back down. The noblewoman frowned at her.

"You promised, Kagome-chan," she said accusingly.

"Sango-sama…" she began to argue, but stopped short at the look on the other woman's face. She would not be leaving the Tachibana residence without a struggle tonight.

"It's not right, Sango-sama," she said softly.

Sango frowned, squeezing her shoulder sympathetically. She stood, tugging Kagome up along with her.

"Come. You need to eat something and have some tea. You can tell me about everything and then rest for a bit before deciding what you want to do," Sango said gently.

Kagome nodded half-heartedly, allowing herself to be led. Still her mind whirled at how quickly things had shifted and how one small incident had left a young boy alone in the world.

* * *

Kagome passed a tense night at the Tachibana residence. She picked listlessly at the food she was given and told Sango the story of what had happened outside the court, leaving out for the time being that the Tennō had been with her and that they had stumbled upon the former Tennō's final resting place. Much as she loved and trusted her friend, there were some things better left unsaid for the moment.

Sango insisted that she stay in her personal room for the night rather than one of the many guest rooms. Kagome knew she feared that she would try to sneak off in the night, but she intended to keep her promise. Her dreams that night were troubled.

In the morning Sango harangued her into eating breakfast and going to see Miroku before she could do anything else. Kagome agreed, partly because she had no idea what else to do. 

She wanted to find Shippou if she could, but she had no idea where to look. And Inuyasha had said he would summon her when he was ready, so there was little she could do but wait on that count. It was frustrating, but she was at a loss.

Miroku's residence seemed even smaller somehow than the last time Kagome had seen it. It was quieter, as well. It took some time before a servant came to greet them in the entryway.

When they asked to see Miroku the servant hesitated, glancing at Sango. She said that she was not certain if the houshi was accepting visitors at the moment and asked them to wait as she went to check. The miko and noblewoman traded a bemused glance.

The servant announced that he was well enough to see them when she returned and led them back into the small garden on the side of the residence. Sango grew visibly anxious at the mention of the houshi's health.

He appeared to be in fine health, though, when they found him sitting beside a small pond in one corner of the garden. He was not alone, either.

Kagome felt her heart catch in her throat at the sight of the small figure sitting bent beside Miroku. The tangle of red hair was even more striking against the gloom of the grey clouds that had choked the sky since the dawn.

"Shippou-chan," she called, her throat constricting around the word.

The small figure sat bolt upright, his head whipping around so quickly it almost looked painful. Green eyes, much dimmer than Kagome remembered, widened. His small face seemed to crumple all in an instance.

"Kagome!"

Kagome was not certain if she moved or if it was him, but a moment later he was in her arms in a blur of motion and color.

"Kagome! Kagome! Kagome!" he sobbed like a mantra, his tears seeping into the front of her robes.

"I'm so sorry, Shippou-chan. I'm so sorry," she murmured in return, her arms wrapped securely about his small form.

She rocked him as he sobbed and shook, tears staining her own face. He rambled with only a semblance of coherence about his parents and his home and how he had tried so hard to find her but had been unable to. Kagome could not bring herself to say anything in return, merely holding him and listening.

At last the tears seemed to run dry and he lifted his face from her chest, gazing up at her with wide red-rimmed eyes.

"Where'm I supposed to go now?" he asked quietly. 

Her heart broke.

"You don't have to go anywhere. You can stay here. I promise I'll take care of you from now on, alright?" Kagome said earnestly, wanting nothing more than to protect him for the rest of his life from the cruelty of the world.

A small spark lit in his eyes.

"Really?" he asked softly, as if the offer might be revoked if he spoke too loudly.

"I promise," Kagome said firmly. "I'm here for as long as you need me."

His expression crumpled once more and he hid his face in the crook of her shoulder. There were no tears this time, but his small arms were banded so firmly about her neck that she knew it would be quite some time before he would let go.

Her gaze met the concerned looks of Sango and Miroku over the child's head, both of them watching helplessly.

"He came to me a few days ago. I believe he was following your scent," Miroku offered, seeming to be at a bit of a loss. “He said he had been separated from the rest of his clan when they were forced to leave court after...well, after. He hid and came searching for you.”

Kagome nodded, adjusting the boy in her arms as she moved to join them.

"I am glad to see you are well. Sango-sama and I were worried when you did not return quickly," Miroku continued with a small smile, reaching out to place a warm hand on her arm.

Kagome's smile in return was brittle.

"I am truly sorry to have worried you both," she said. "Have you been feeling unwell? One of your servants mentioned that you had not been well enough to take visitors. Is there anything I can do for you? I know a number of herbal remedies I could mix."

Sango's eyes turned to the houshi in concern. Miroku's smile took on a guilty quirk at the corners.

"It is not so much a physical illness as a reluctance to be in the company of courtiers at the moment," he said with an apologetic glance at Sango. "They have been rather…critical in regards to my social standing of late."

"Who? What have they been saying to you?" Sango asked sharply, looking indignant on his behalf.

"Nothing that I would repeat in the company of ladies such as yourselves," he hedged, though neither missed the genuine flash of anger that flitted just behind his eyes.

"Is this all because of…" Kagome began, trailing off as she remembered the child in her arms.

Miroku and Sango seemed to realize it, as well, their gazes dropping to the little boy. A tense silence stretched between the three.

"They didn't do it," came the muffled murmur from Kagome's shoulder.

Shippou raised his head, glaring up at all three of them with defiant eyes.

"They didn't do it," he repeated more loudly. "My parents wouldn't do somethin' like that! All they wanted was to work here and earn some money, but some man said they stole his stuff and then they were killed! But they didn't do it! I swear!"

Kagome turned incredulous eyes on her two friends.

Sango bit her lower lip, her gaze sliding away from the other woman's. Miroku placed a hand on her shoulder.

"It was their word against that of the Taira headman's. The law was brutally clear in this instance," Miroku explained, a bitter edge to his words.

"That's not fair!" Kagome exclaimed indignantly. "They were condemned on nothing more than a word?"

"It is the law, Kagome-chan," Sango said weakly, though she could not meet the other woman's eyes. "It is above us all."

Kagome bit down on her lip angrily, unable to argue the point. The law was a thing divinely ordained, passed from the kami to the Tennō to the people. Was it for her to argue with the kami?

But she could not forget the orphaned child in her arms so easily. He looked up at her with eyes that burned with fierce, frustrated tears and she could not believe that this was just.

"I think I need to go now," she said softly.

Miroku frowned, taking a step towards her.

"You only just arrived, Kagome-chan," he said.

"I just need to take a walk," Kagome said. "Everything…Everything is piling up. I just need to get out for a bit."

Both seemed to be on the verge of saying something, of stepping forward to stop her.

"I won't leave again. I promise," Kagome said, sensing their concern. "I just need to collect my thoughts."

"Then we will be waiting here with lunch when you return," Sango said, her eyes hopeful.

Kagome nodded, turning and heading out of the residence.

For awhile Kagome walked aimlessly about the court with the kitsune who was now her own. Neither was much inclined toward speech.

Eventually Kagome's steps led them to the En no Matsubara and the Goshinboku, where they settled into the roots to sit together.

"Are you angry?" Kagome asked softly, stroking his hair as he sat in her lap.

"Yeah," he replied, his voice losing all hints of childishness for a moment.

She drew a shaky breath, wrapping her arms around him and drawing him back into her chest. He did not resist, but he did not lean into her entirely either.

"I promise I will take care of you from now on," she vowed quietly, wishing she had been able to take care of him when he had truly needed it.

She had worked so hard to gain some semblance of respect for herself in the court that she might begin to help fix the things that had gone awry. Now she wondered if perhaps she had gone about it all wrong.

She had tried to earn their respect by working on their level and to a degree she had been successful. But that was only because she had tried to make them forget about her common birth. What had happened to Shippou's parents made it agonizingly clear that the people of the court considered anyone outside of themselves to be little more than nothing. 

She had done well for herself, but had done nothing for others of common birth. She had been running headfirst in the wrong direction.

Stroking the boy's hair back, she wondered if she could really continue to stay here where people such as herself counted for nothing. She toyed absently with the fantasy of simply taking Shippou back to her village to live out the rest of their lives in relative peace.

She sighed, knowing she could never do it. She had promised Inuyasha that she would remain at his side and she had promised Miroku and Sango that she would not run off again. Besides which she would accomplish nothing by running.

Could she really just submit herself to a system of law that would sooner condemn her for her birth than seek the truth, though?

Abruptly Shippou sat up straight as a rod in her lap. He wiggled free of her arms and leapt in front of her, his small teeth bared.

"Shippou-chan?"

His name had no sooner left her mouth than a gale rose around them, kicking up dirt in all directions. Both coughed, covering their eyes until the clouds settled.

Standing before them, arms crossed as casually as if he had merely strolled up, was Kouga.

The fur all along Shippou's tail rose. He glared warningly at Kouga, what Kagome could only imagine was a small growl stuttering in the back of his throat.

"Found ya," Kouga announced, his grin entirely wolfish.

Ignoring Shippou's threatening posturing, he swaggered leisurely toward her.

"You skipped out on me," he accused, though his grin did not fade in the least. "But I knew you'd be back. No way my woman's gonna leave me behind."

"I had business I had to attend to," Kagome replied vaguely, standing and scooping the kitsune into her arms to keep him from lunging at the larger youkai. He squirmed in her hold until he was facing Kouga, continuing to glare fiercely at him.

"Leave Kagome alone!" he snapped. "I won't let any of you stupid courtiers touch her!"

This caught Kouga's attention. He quirked a brow in an almost amused fashion, leaning down until he was face to face with Shippou. He bared his own, much sharper fangs in a too-wide grin.

"You've got guts, kid, but you'd do better to know when an enemy's too big for you," he advised lowly, snapping his teeth once for emphasis.

Kagome scowled, pulling the child away from him.

"Please do me the kindness of not picking on children, Kouga-sama," she said sternly.

He scoffed, then blinked, and squinted more closely at Shippou. Shippou bristled, glaring at him in return.

"You look familiar, runt," Kouga said, frowning as he struggled to recall. "Ah! I know. You look like those kitsune who were beheaded the other day."

Kagome's hand had connected with the flesh of Kouga's cheek before she even realized she was moving. His head did not move an inch, though his cheek reddened rapidly. He blinked bemusedly at her.

Kagome glared at him in return, tucking Shippou closer to her chest with her throbbing hand as if she might protect him from the memory.

"How dare you say something like that so casually," she hissed. "Two people are dead! And for what? To reassure you courtiers of your superiority?"

"Hey! I'm no stuffy-ass courtier! I came here and stayed here for you, remember?" Kouga snapped in return, an unusual flare of pique flashing across his features. "Besides, I'm with you on this. I don't think they did what Hakudoshi said they did. Even if they did, what the court did ain't right."

Some of the edge drained from Kagome's face. She shifted Shippou in her arms, gazing warily at the wolf Lord.

"You…you truly think so?" she asked.

"We don't handle it that way in my tribe," Kouga said, shaking his head. "We don't hand out punishment without letting everyone speak their piece. And we sure as hell don't dole out death as the punishment for everything. All that would do is breed resentment among my people."

"But what about the law of the kami?" she countered with a note of desperation creeping into her voice. "Can you disregard it so easily?"

Kouga snorted derisively, but sobered slightly at the look on her face. Her wide eyes were trained on his face, searching. It was rare for him to get this kind of attention from her.

He sighed, scratching his head. He figured he'd better try and be serious this time.

"Look, I know about that stupid law. According to it, me and my tribe aren't worth much. And you and the kitsune aren't worth shit. Do you really feel like you aren't worth shit?" he said.

"No," Kagome replied, softly but firmly. "We're not worthless."

"Right. Me'n my tribe feel the same. So instead of following a law we can't believe in, we decided to make one that we could. 'Cuz the law of the kami or whoever really only suits the courtiers," he said.

Kagome gazed at him for a long moment, processing this. She frowned, her gaze dropping.

"I have always believed that following the ways of the kami was the best path one could take in life," she said softly.

"You really think the best path is the one where you're worthless?" Kouga countered, one brow cocked critically. "You think that's what the kami want for you?"

"…I don't know," Kagome confessed, her voice small. "I don't know what they want for me anymore."

"Try asking them, then," Kouga said, as if it were as simple as that. "I've never talked to 'em, but maybe they might answer you."

A small laugh escaped her at the straightforwardness of the suggestion. She offered him a wry grin.

"Perhaps you are wiser than I have given you credit for, Kouga-sama," she said. "I am sorry for having been stingy in my esteem."

"Yeah, well," he blustered, puffing up. "I am pretty wise."

Kagome laughed, her smile widening. She shifted Shippou in her arms. He was asleep, having dozed off some time after realizing that Kouga was no threat to her. She imagined he must be entirely exhausted after the past week that he had had.

"I am sorry that I left without saying anything," she said. "Come sit and talk with me for awhile?"

She took a seat on one of the upraised roots, patting the seat beside her invitingly.

Kouga took the seat eagerly, a silly grin stretching across his face.

* * *

After Kouga finished expounding upon how much he had missed her and how much he hated the court though he remained for her sake, they talked more of the laws in his tribe. Kagome was fascinated and slightly wary at the idea that they followed a code that was entirely of their own making, tailored to fit their own needs with regards to the ways of the kami but without worry over their approbation.

As to his association with the Taira clan, Kouga informed her with no small amount of pride that he had managed to make quite a bit of headway in gaining their trust. As the Lord of quite a large number of youkai outside of the court, they were eager to solicit his good will and cooperation.

He had not yet been allowed access to the upper echelons of the clan, but he said that he was hopeful he soon would be if he did not misstep. He also informed her that if there was foul play afoot, it was buried too deeply for him to see yet.

Kouga reluctantly allowed her to take her leave when the sun began to sink below the walls of the court, securing from her first the promise that she would be sure to meet with him once more in a few days' time.

Kagome returned to Miroku's residence with Shippou still fast asleep in her arms. Miroku and Sango were having tea together when she arrived and looked relieved at her return.

She offered them both a sheepish smile to reassure them of her much improved state of mind. The remaining tension dissolved and a meal was ordered for all of them to share.

Shippou woke as the food was set out for them, digging in ravenously. His table manners were nothing short of horrendous, but Kagome did not have the heart to chide him for it at the moment. She resolved to start teaching him soon, though, as he was going to be remaining under her care in the court.

They all ate quietly for a time, the sound of Shippou's occasional slurps and crunches the only real noise in the room. At length Miroku cleared his throat, setting down his hashi in a manner that made clear his intent to speak seriously.

Kagome and Sango both mirrored his movements, giving him their full attention.

He met both of their eyes solemnly, one and then the other. His gaze held Sango's for an instance longer, something unreadable flashing behind his dark eyes.

"I want to make clear to you both where I stand, as I hold you in higher esteem than anyone else in my acquaintance," he said. "I have no intention of letting what has happened pass unmarked."

Sango and Kagome exchanged a look. Faint stirrings of alarm flitted across Sango's face.

"What do you mean, houshi-sama?" she asked, her eyes searching his face as she turned back towards him.

Miroku turned his full attention upon her, his eyes meeting hers in a silent plea for understanding. Sango blinked, her features tightening anxiously.

"We have known one another since childhood, Sango-sama, and I know there is no ill-will in your heart towards any being, big or small," he said earnestly. "But the same cannot be said for much of the rest of the court. As an outsider I have long allowed myself to be treated as an inferior within the court, believing that it was merely my burden to bear here."

"This tragedy has proven me wrong. In failing to stand for myself, I have failed others, as well. I can no longer remain silent and hope for change to be wrought on its own or by the hands of those who have no interest in it."

All the color had drained from Sango's face. She gazed at him as if he had just slapped her, cold horror dawning in her wide eyes.

"I never…I never knew you were suffering," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "You always looked so cheerful. I never…Why didn't you ever tell me?"

Miroku frowned. His gaze sunk to the table between them.

"As I said, it was mine to bear. I did not wish to burden you with it," he said. "I do not blame you, Sango-sama."

"I blame me!" Sango yelled, slamming her palms down on the table. Tears shimmered brightly in her burning eyes.

"I blame me for not knowing! I blame me for not seeing! I blame me for never doing anything! Did you truly think that I could be indifferent to your suffering?"

She glared at him. He still could not meet her gaze. Tense silence stretched tight between them.

"…I never thought myself equal to you," Miroku said at last. "And thus I never confided in you. But I wish to stand equal at your side now. And that is something that I am willing to fight for."

His eyes locked with hers. The tears burning in her eyes slipped down her cheeks at last and the anger vanished from her expression. Both were silent, searching for something in each other.

Kagome looked on with wide eyes, her presence obviously forgotten for the moment. Even Shippou had paused in his gorging to watch. Kagome fidgeted, feeling they should leave the room but not wanting to draw the attention of her friends by moving.

Shippou burped.

Kagome blanched.

Miroku and Sango's eyes swung towards them.

In an instant Sango's face was the color of Inuyasha's haori. Even Miroku looked mildly embarrassed, clearing his throat loudly.

"As I said, I have no intention of being passive any longer," he said, his tone overly businesslike. "I am not yet certain what course of action I will take, but I wished to make you both aware of my intent to act."

"Whatever you decide to do, you will have my aid," Sango said, overcoming some of her discomfiture.

"Sango-sama…" he said, looking as if he might argue.

"No, Miroku!" she interrupted. "It is far past the time when I should have stood with you! I will stand with you now. If you are concerned about my position within the court, know that I am not."

She met his gaze unwaveringly, her jaw set. He hesitated for a moment, but could not fight back a small smile. An answering grin crept across her features.

"As you wish," he conceded, with a gentlemanly flourish of one of his hands.

Watching them, Kagome felt some of her uncertainty fade. Sango was so ready and willing to leap to the aid of her friend. She wasted no time worrying over laws that she knew in her heart to be unfair. She placed all of her faith in her friends.

Kagome wanted to do the same, though the thought of going so blatantly against the kami sent a chill sweeping through her.

Miroku seemed to notice this. He turned his attention on her, his expression sobering a degree.

"I do not wish to make you uncomfortable, Kagome-sama," he said. "Nor do I require any vows of your support. I understand your beliefs and would not force you to compromise yourself."

Somehow the assurance made her feel worse, but she could not quite manage to form a reply. So she merely nodded, her eyes downcast.

Silence descended for a few moments. Sango folded her hands back into her voluminous sleeves, rising from the table.

"It is growing late," she said, once more the picture of propriety and grace. "I think it is time we take our leave for the night, houshi-sama. Thank you for your hospitality."

"Not at all," Miroku replied, rising as well. "You are always welcome at any time. Allow me to see you out."

Kagome scooped up Shippou, who was once again looking drowsy after having stuffed himself. She followed her two friends out, solemnly observing the warm glances they exchanged.

She prayed for certainty.

* * *

No certainty dawned with the rising sun the following morning.

Kagome had chosen to stay the night at the Tachibana residence. As far as she knew her place was still technically in the Fujiwara residence, but she did not relish the prospect of returning there after all that had happened.

Thus she accepted Sango's offer of a guest room to stay in for the night. Shippou remained in the room with her, sharing her futon. He was still anxious, reluctant to be parted from her for long. She could hardly blame him.

Sango woke them both in the morning with promises of tea and breakfast. Both were served promptly and the three sat and discussed what to do with the day.

The entrance of a servant interrupted their planning. He bowed once, informing Sango that a servant of the future Empress awaited Kagome in front of the residence.

Kagome felt her stomach sink. She had known this would come eventually, but she had hoped to put it off for at least a few days.

She could hardly refuse the future Empress' summons, though. With a sigh she asked Sango if she could watch Shippou while she went to attend Kikyou.

Sango agreed readily, but the kitsune protested. He refused to be separated from her, clinging to her leg desperately. He cried that he did not want her to disappear, too.

Kagome could not resist such a plea, though she knew this meeting would be no place for the child. Still she acquiesced, apologizing to Sango and promising to return as quickly as possible.

The Fujiwara servant awaiting her outside the residence cast a questioning look at Shippou, but did not comment. It was a long, silent walk to the inner palace and Kikyou's residence.

When they reached it the servant directed her towards the future Empress' chambers, informing her that the other woman awaited her there.

Kagome instructed Shippou to wait outside the room for her. He agreed reluctantly, seating himself just outside the shoji.

She hesitated just outside the room, her stomach in a knot and her mind working furiously. She had no idea how to face the woman after all that had happened.

Taking a deep breath, she slid the screen open.

Hard brown eyes met her own. Kikyou's back was unyieldingly straight, her mouth set in an unforgiving line.

"You do not bother even to observe proper etiquette in opening the shoji now?" she said, forgoing any sort of greeting. "Your constant demonstrations of your lack of respect for myself and the court will no longer be tolerated."

"Have you even the vaguest notion of what chaos you caused in abandoning your duties here in favor of a few minor villages? Your priorities are far from where they need to be if you intend to be of any use within the court."

Kagome gaped at her for a moment, unprepared for such an immediate assault. Kikyou returned her gaze, fire and ice in her eyes. An intricate fan flapped in short, sharp waves in her left hand. 

Even in her anger, her vivid green juni-hito was arranged impeccably around her kneeling form. She was every inch the irreproachable courtier.

And all at once everything shifted into sharp, clear relief for Kagome. The future Empress' words and what she had allowed to happen.

"That is all that any of us are to you, isn't it?" Kagome said. "Minor? Barely even worth your consideration?"

It was Kikyou's turn to be taken aback, her fan stilling slowly in her hand. Obviously she had been expecting a much more deferent response. Kagome felt a twisted satisfaction in having interrupted her composure even slightly.

"I will not stand for insolence from you, Kagome. Not after I have allowed you such leeway," Kikyou said, her tone hardening warningly. Her fan snapped shut in a gesture that demanded an end to Kagome's nonsense.

But Kagome was far from done.

"You may stand or sit as you please, Fujiwara-sama, but you will hear me and you will understand that you are in the wrong here," Kagome returned, advancing upon the woman.

She did not kneel. She would not submit this time.

"I believe you are a good woman. I have respected you, even grudgingly, since the time I entered the court. But you have done wrong. You have robbed a little boy of his parents without thought."

Kikyou blinked, her brow wrinkling slightly in confusion. Comprehension dawned slowly in her eyes. She set her jaw once more.

"I followed the law," she said coolly. "They were thieves and they dared even to assault one of the Taira in the process of their crime. They were unable to defend themselves against the accusations."

"Precisely! They hadn't the slightest hope of defending themselves!" Kagome burst out, the noblewoman's detachment fueling her anger. "What proof did you have? What, other than the word of the Taira who you know to be suspect? And what besides their own word did they have to defend them? A word that you count as insignificant!"

Kikyou's expression turned to stone. She rose, slowly and with painful dignity, to face Kagome.

"I followed the law," she repeated lowly. "They stood accused by a nobleman of thievery and assault. The law was clear and I enforced it, as is my duty as future Empress. And I will not be made to repent because you refuse comprehend that."

"And I will not be made to be silent because you cannot comprehend that the law might be wrong," Kagome said. "I am not worthless, nor were they. We are children of the kami as much as you and I will not pretend otherwise any longer."

"Continue in your blasphemy and I will see you thrown from the court," Kikyou said, unmoved.

Some of Kagome's anger cooled into disappointment. The other woman refused to hear her.

"Do as you will," she said softly. "But I hope that you will at least think. You stole the lives of two people without hesitation. You orphaned a little boy. Those are burdens that you will have to live with, but you do not have to add to them. Please think. Please prove that you are the woman I believe you to be."

Kikyou was silent, her expression entirely closed off.

Kagome sighed, turning and exiting the room without another word. Shippou gazed up at her with wide, solemn eyes as she picked him up.

"She killed my parents?" he asked.

"…No," Kagome replied after a moment. "Ignorance is responsible for the death of your parents. She was merely the body it moved through. Do you think you can understand?"

"I don't know," Shippou said quietly.

They both fell silent.

* * *

They spent the remainder of the day wandering the court. Shippou had yet to see much of it and Kagome decided that a tour was in order. It at least served to keep both of their minds occupied.

They also visited the bathhouse. Kagome made certain to wait until an odd hour when she knew that scarcely anyone would be there, uncertain as she was of what their reception would be.

She cleaned Shippou up first, the layers of dirt that came off of him evidence that he had not bathed in quite some time. His clothes were also washed, though there was not much she could do against the years of caked in grime that clung to them. She resolved to have new clothes made for him as soon as she could.

Afterwards she took Shippou back to the Tachibana residence. His stomach was rumbling audibly.

In the back of her mind she was anxious, fearing that a servant would be waiting for her there to force her from the court. Perhaps worse after the way she had spoken to the future Empress.

Still she did not regret having spoken her mind. She did not feel wrong.

But her worries were for naught. No servant awaited her. Sango was not at home, either. The servants were familiar enough with her to allow her in anyway, preparing a quick meal for her and the little boy.

Shippou inhaled his food once again. Kagome wondered if it was because he was growing or because he was so unaccustomed to having food so readily available. She ate little of her own food, her appetite nearly nonexistent.

Shippou began to nod off almost immediately afterward. Kagome took him to the guest room they had shared the night before and put him to bed. She sat beside the futon, stroking his hair until she was certain he was asleep.

Alone in the dark room with only her thoughts to keep her company, her anxiety began to grow once more. She had no idea what the future Empress intended to do. She was certain that she would not go unpunished. Even if she had been in the right in what she had said, she had spoken far above her own station.

She fidgeted uneasily, wondering what in all of Japan she would do if she were banned from the court. She could hardly bear the thought of being made to give up after all that she had done.

Perhaps she could lead the villages in revolt. Win fair recognition for them.

But they had so few resources at their disposal that success would be unlikely without great sacrifice. And even that was only provided that she could rouse the villages to action. Judging from what she had recently witnessed, many of them wished only to live as far apart from the court as possible.

Besides which, raising a rebellion would mean going against Inuyasha. If it came to that, she did not think that she could do it.

She sat up straight, realizing suddenly what she needed to do. Quietly she crept from the room, careful not to wake the sleeping boy.

She would go to Inuyasha and make herself clear. There was no way he would allow her to be put out of the court if only he understood.

Kagome hastened to the Dairi and Inuyasha's chambers. The guards there informed her that he was out in his private gardens. She thanked them, knowing almost instinctively where he would be.

She retraced her steps from the last time that she had been there, heading towards the spot where they had often met. Reaching the line of trees that hid the small hill and pond, she was gratified to hear his voice.

She paused, though, at the sound of another voice answering his.

Peeking cautiously out from behind one of the trees, she strained to make out the figures atop of the hill through the darkness of night.

The fiery red of his haori identified Inuyasha, sitting at the peak of the hill. Standing beside him…

Kagome froze, her heart sinking into her stomach.

Kikyou was with him.

Even under the shroud of darkness, she looked more discomposed than Kagome had ever seen her. Her hair was unornamented, she carried no fan with her, and even her juni-hito was arranged improperly.

Besides which she stood while Inuyasha sat, forgetting even the etiquette of not rising above the Tennō. Her expression was hard to read in the dim light, but her body was set in a rigid line.

"Then you will put her above me in this, too?" she said, so lowly that Kagome barely caught the words. "You will allow her blatant disrespect for this entire court and its laws to continue unchecked?"

"Kikyou-"

"No!" she snapped, and Kagome flinched. It was the first time she had ever heard the woman's voice rise above its usual controlled drawl.

"No, Inuyasha! I will not stand for it! I have tried to respect your decisions as my Lord and sovereign, but I will not be silent any longer! You have already abandoned me-abandoned your duties- to indulge her in her misguided whims! How far will you allow this to go before you cease to be blinded by her and remember your duties?"

"I promised to protect her. I couldn't just let her go out there and get herself killed after what she's done here."

"And what of what I have done?" Kikyou returned, her voice dropping once more to a strained whisper. "Have you any idea of what you left me to when you went chasing after her? Had anyone discovered you were missing, I would have been lost. You abandoned me, Inuyasha, to trail after some common girl that you have hardly known for more than a few months. You left me alone…"

Her voice cracked, despite her best efforts to keep it firm. Inuyasha rose, his outline moving towards her.

"Kikyou…I…I'm sorry. I didn't think…"

His arms went around her. She seemed to hesitate, but after a moment her arms went eagerly around him in return.

"I am to be your wife," she said softly. "You have made promises to me, as well. I want to support you, my Lord, but I will not come second to her."

"I'm sorry, Kikyou," Inuyasha repeated, his voice uncharacteristically soft. "And you're right. You're…you're the one who's going to be my wife. You have to come first."

There was silence between them then, but Kagome's ears were filled with the thundering of her own heart. She felt hot and cold at the same time and wished desperately she could bring herself to move. She was rooted to the spot.

Kikyou leaned back slightly in the embrace. Slowly she leaned in, pressing her lips to his.

Kagome bolted.

* * *

She ran, stumbling, all the way back to the Tachibana residence. At least that gave the sharp aching in her chest the excuse of over-exertion.

She wanted to keep running, but she had no idea to where. She could not run fast enough to escape.

After a few long minutes of indecision she gave up and went inside. She headed absently for one of the reception rooms, needing to sit and calm herself.

She wandered into a room and paused, surprised to see someone already inside. The halls were quiet as many of the servants had already retired for the night.

It was Sango, her face faintly illuminated by the light of a candle. She knelt on one of the room's several cushions, bent intently over a scroll spread across her lap.

She glanced up when Kagome entered, her hands sliding unconsciously to cover the scroll.

"Kagome-chan," she said, a flush creeping up over her cheeks. "What are you doing up so late?"

"I might ask the same of you," Kagome said, grateful for the momentary distraction. "What are you reading?"

She knelt down beside her, trying to make out what was written on the aged parchment. Sango sheepishly removed her hands, allowing her a proper view.

"A record of my clan," she explained. "I was just looking it over."

Kagome's eyes skimmed over the numerous names, arranged like the branches of a tree to reflect the people's relations to one another within the clan.

"For what purpose?" she asked, her eyes trailing down until she found the names of Sango, her father, and her brother.

"I…I wished to see if there was anyone of lower status that had ever been brought into our family," she said, color rising once more to suffuse her face.

Kagome glanced up at her, a small smile lighting her face.

"For Miroku-sama's sake," she supplied. "To prove that commoners really aren't so far from courtiers. You're a good friend, Sango-sama."

Sango chuckled uneasily.

"Well, I have yet to find anything," she hedged, rolling the scroll up and setting it aside. "But what of your meeting with the future Empress? She was not too harsh with you, was she?"

A pang shot through Kagome. Two shadowed figures locked in an intimate embrace. A kiss.

"…I would rather not talk about it, if that's alright," she said, her voice slipping out in a rasp.

Sango frowned, craning her head to try and meet the younger girl's eyes. She blinked, surprised.

"Kagome-chan," she murmured worriedly. "You're crying. What's wrong?"

Kagome reached up to touch her own cheek, her fingers coming away damp. Surely enough she was crying. She felt her lower lip begin to tremble, a choked sob escaping her.

"I-I don't know," she fumbled. "I shouldn't be…I don't know…"

She pressed her hands to her face, trying to stem the flow of tears. Sango's hand came to rest on her shoulder, the older woman leaning in protectively.

"What did she say to you?" she asked sternly. "Future Empress or not, I will not allow her to-"

"No, it wasn't her," Kagome said, shaking her head. She sniffled miserably, wishing the tears would stop.

"Then what, Kagome-chan?" Sango pressed anxiously. "What could have upset you so much? Please, I want to help."

Kagome bit her lip, drawing a shaky breath. She shook her head once more.

"I just…I saw something. And it surprised me, that's all," she said, a weak attempt at sounding casual.

Sango frowned, reaching out with her trailing sleeves to dab at the younger girl's face. She met her eyes intently.

"This is not what surprise looks like, Kagome," she said gently. "This…this is what heartbreak looks like. Tell me what you saw or it will only continue to eat away at you."

Kagome blinked up at her with red-rimmed eyes. She hesitated, uncertain herself what exactly was wrong with her and at a loss to explain it to Sango.

"I saw…I saw a man I know, a courtier, while I was out walking," she began, hoping that in speaking she could begin to make sense of the jumble of her emotions. "He was with…with his…with his…betrothed…"

Her voice cracked. Sango squeezed her shoulder, silently encouraging her.

"T-they were together," Kagome continued shakily. "They were…embracing. I didn't mean to see them…it's not as if I didn't know they were engaged. I was just…shocked, I guess…"

Several hiccupping sobs overtook her. Inuyasha's soft words to Kikyou echoed in her head.

"Oh, Kagome," Sango crooned, wrapping her arms about the girl's shoulders. "I am so sorry. I never realized."

"…Realized what?" Kagome rasped, dragging the back of her hand roughly across each eye.

"That you are in love and suffering so much over it," Sango said, smoothing her hair back from her face. "That's what this is, Kagome-chan."

Kagome froze. Slowly she shook her head.

"No," she said, a little more forcefully than necessary. "No, there's no way that I…"

She could not bring herself to finish. She continued to shake her head as if that might force the very notion out of it.

Sango pulled back slightly, placing her hands on either side of Kagome's face. She met her eyes earnestly.

"You will prolong your own suffering by refusing to accept it," she said. "Do you think of him often? Desire to be near him whenever possible? Do you confide in him and desire his good opinion of you above all others?"

Kagome sat mute. The instinctive 'yes' that vibrated through her turned her blood to ice in her veins.

"…I can't be," she mumbled through lips gone numb, wanting to convince herself as much as Sango. "Even if he weren't betrothed already, such a hope on my part…would be impossible. Our statuses…there's no way. I'd be a fool to even…"

Sango's face softened sympathetically. She pulled back, turning and grabbing the scroll she had been looking at before. She proffered it to Kagome.

"That is a kind of foolishness that I know well," she confessed quietly. "I was not searching this for houshi-sama. I was doing it for myself."

She hesitated, her eyes downcast.

"I wanted…to see if there was any record of marriage between the nobility and those of lower status. I wanted to know if it was even a possibility. I hoped that if there was at least precedent, then there…there might be hope for me, as well. But…there is none, and I am as much a fool as you."

She glanced up, tears glittering on her lashes, and shrugged helplessly. A small, sad laugh escaped her.

"I am in love with houshi-sama."

Tears tracked slowly down her pale cheeks, the picture made all the more tragic by the wobbly smile that threatened to slip from her face at any moment. A sob that was half laugh escaped Kagome, her tears overflowing once more.

She slid forward on her knees to embrace Sango, clinging to the woman and being clung to in return.

"At least we can be fools together," she whispered, feeling the weight of the words as they slipped from her.

Somehow, somewhere along the line, she had fallen in love with Inuyasha.

Entirely, hopelessly in love.


	17. Of Right and Rites

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our history lesson for today:
> 
> -Mt. Hakusan: a spiritual mountain in Japan, similar to Mount Fuji. It was a popular place to sojourn for spiritualists of the Heian period after a sect of Buddhist ascetics set up a temple there. Associated with the kami Izanagi and Izanami, the creators of the human race (and youkai, in this fic).
> 
> -Shikon no Tama: the Shikon Jewel or Jewel of Four Souls. I believe the properties of the four souls it contains are explained somewhere in the manga/anime.
> 
> -kemari: sort of like modern day hacky sack, but with a larger ball. The object is to keep the ball in the air using any part of the body, but there is an aesthetic quality to it as well that demands grace while the ball is kept aloft. Popularized in the Heian period, the game continues to be played in Japan today.

Revolutions were made by degrees. By the minutest shifts in thought and the smallest actions, coalescing over time to form the new.

These were some of the musings that Kagome entertained in the days following her reluctant revelation-the sort of abstract musings well suited to a mind steeped in melancholy.

She went over and over the events since her arrival in the court in her mind, trying to pinpoint when exactly it had happened. She chastised herself for not having had the sense to guard against it. 

She had thought him rough at first, abrasive and off-putting, but small glimpses of a man who was deeply brave and determined to do right where he could had peeked out at her like the glimmer of the sun peeking out from behind storm clouds. And he had been loyal to her, had trusted her in his own way, when few others had.

By degrees her respect had been earned. By degrees she had come to desire his friendship and confidence. She had scarcely noticed when her desire to be of help to him began to take just as high a place as her desire to help the people of her village. Had scarcely noticed when her friendly affections had ceased to be so simple as they once were.

Kagome tried to console herself with the knowledge that she had no prior experience in such matters and that the sheer improbability of such an affection between herself and the Tennō had kept the thought from ever entering her mind. She had not guarded herself against her affections because she had never suspected them until it was too late.

Still, this was a rather cold comfort to heartbreak.

She passed two listless days with Sango and Shippou, seldom leaving the sanctuary of the Tachibana residence. Memories, moments of self-reproach, dark thoughts on the future, and the hopelessness of her situation assailed her by turns during her waking hours, exhausting her beyond the will to do much besides wander the Tachibana gardens.

Sango seemed to bear up under it much better, though the older woman confessed to her that she had had a good amount of time to come to terms with her own situation. She described with a bitter mixture of wistfulness and pain the days of her childhood that she had spent at Miroku's side, drawn to him at first by his obvious loneliness in the court and then by his wit and kindness.

He had been flirtatious with her as they grew older, but she dismissed it as his way and tried not to take it to heart. Besides which she had always known that when she came of age she would be married off to the head of another branch of her clan to assure good relations between the families.

But Miroku's constant attention, his endless support and companionship, had been taken to heart nonetheless. She found herself jealous of his attentions to other women and lonely when he went out of the court on assignment. She found that she desired his esteem above that of any other person.

Privately, for all that she could tell that Sango was as troubled as herself, Kagome thought her slightly better off. Now all the pieces began at last to form a clear picture, and Kagome could not help but believe Miroku's feelings were much the same as Sango’s.

Whether or not that mutual affection would ever come to fruition was the true problem. She did not say this to Sango-sama, though, as she felt it was not her place to declare Miroku's feelings for him.

Sadly she could not claim the same comfort for herself. Inuyasha was already wholly committed to another woman. There was no chance that her feelings could be returned in kind.

Even his tentative trust and friendship must now be in question, serving to compound her suffering further. For those two days the worry buzzed constantly in the back of her mind that she would be summoned to his chambers and dismissed for her behavior towards the woman who was to be his wife. The very thought was unbearable, bringing with it fresh tears every time it surfaced.

The summons never came, though. All was silence on his end, and at last her capacity for suffering and self-pity exhausted itself.

* * *

With the dawning of the third morning came resolve. Kagome could no longer indulge her sorrow. Thinking and brooding and mulling over the situation had not changed it one bit or served to dispel her unwelcome feelings.

Thus she resolved that she would bury her feelings, never to speak of them again. They could only be a hindrance if she was to continue to work in the court. And for all that had happened between herself and the future Empress, Kagome had no real desire to come between her and the Tennō.

Inuyasha had made his promise to Kikyou first, after all, and if nothing else she seemed to care for him sincerely. And, much as it pained her to think on it, he seemed to return her affections.

Besides which, even in the rare moments when Kagome allowed herself to indulge in the fantasy that they might somehow be together, she had to acknowledge that such a connection could only be detrimental to both of their positions within the court. She had only her spiritual gifts to recommend her, and even those would be in question if she were to be the thing that broke up his long-standing engagement.

It would seem as if she had merely come to court seeking power for herself and he would seem fool enough for falling for her ploy. 

Kagome would not do harm to Inuyasha for the world, not even with her own feelings. And so they were pushed down deep, her burden to bear for the sake of them both.

That morning she decided to pay a visit to the temple, a vague notion of purifying herself and starting anew forming in her mind. She left Shippou to keep Sango-sama company, promising to return soon. The young kitsune was gradually relaxing to the point where she could be out of his sight for more than a stretch at a time, though he still groused slightly at being left behind.

The Chūwain was silent and still in the early light of morning. Kagome tucked her hands back into the sleeves of her robes as she ascended the long flight of stairs, the chill beneath the shadow of the trees sharp and invigorating. She breathed deeply, relieved to be outside once more after days of relative isolation.

She shuddered as she went through the process of cleaning her mouth and hands, the water in the basin icy. Still, it soothed the ragged ache in her chest that had plagued her since that unfortunate night.

She stepped to the entrance of the temple slowly and consciously, moving through the familiar ritual of claps and bows to alert the kami to her presence. The sound of her own motions echoed on the still morning air and she delighted in the sound.

The statue of Amaterasu that Midoriko had once shown her seemed the best place for meditation and she headed towards it. The small pavilion was as empty as the rest of the Chūwain, Amaterasu gazing serenely out at the world which she sustained with her light.

Kagome knelt down before the statue, bowing until her forehead brushed the ground. She remained there, concentrating all of her attention on the statue before her.

"Amaterasu-hime-sama, I pray for guidance and for the strength to stand when others cannot," she began. "I have taken a stand against the laws of the kami, against your laws, but I fear I cannot ask forgiveness of you. I will not. When I think on you, giver of light and sustainer of life, I cannot believe that you could condone a system that counts the lives of certain people for so little. Shippou-chan…Shippou-chan did nothing to deserve what has been done to him."

"Nor, I believe, did his parents. They wanted only to make a way for themselves and their son in the world. I long to follow the ways of the kami, to live with balance and kindness, but I…I will not submit to a law simply because others contend that it is of you, Amaterasu-hime-sama. I must follow my own mind, the mind given to me by the kami, in this. I ask your blessing, but I will go it alone if I must."

She released a breath and rose, glad to have given voice to her resolve. For a moment her eyes caught the eyes of the statue.

Eyes that appeared now to be gazing back into her own. The smile shifted on the kami's face, became deeper and warmer.

Kagome blinked.

The statue was unchanged. She frowned, shaking her head and wondering if perhaps lack of sleep over the course of the last few days was beginning to affect her mind.

"Kagome?"

Her gaze swung once more to the statue's face. It was unmoved.

A hand came down lightly on her shoulder. Kagome turned to find Midoriko just behind her.

"It is you. I am glad to see you have returned, and in good health it seems. I was worried," she said, a gentle smile sliding across her features.

Kagome noted slight lines around her eyes and mouth, wondering if they had been there before. She looked tired, as if she truly had been worrying deeply over Kagome's disappearance.

Abruptly the girl's mind flashed back. Kaede's final confession. Her first encounter with Midoriko.

She blinked wordlessly up at Midoriko for several long moments. At last her expression dissolved into a frown.

"You knew," she accused softly, unable to stifle it. "All along…you knew."

Midoriko's smile faded by degrees until she was frowning in return.

"Knew what, Kagome?" she said, an undertone of apprehension to her words betraying her.

"About the Shikon no Tama," Kagome returned, searching her face. "You knew from the moment I came to you that I had it. You…you touched my hip. You knew."

Midoriko's eyes darkened. Kagome's heart sank. She could not help but feel that she had been used somehow. She averted her eyes from the older woman's.

"Kagome…I only wanted-"

"What is it exactly? Why were you so desperate to get rid of it?" Kagome broke in softly, loathe to listen to any sort of justifications. "I think you owe me at least an explanation."

She felt Midoriko hesitate behind her. At last she knelt down beside her, her gaze fixed on the face of Amaterasu.

"I thought it better that you did not know," Midoriko said lowly. "The Shikon…it has a way of twisting things. Of changing people. I thought that ignorance would be safety for you. I wanted to protect you…to atone for my mistakes."

Kagome glanced at her from the corner of her eye, the O-Miko's words resonating inside her head with Kaede's final confession. Her hands, clasped in her lap, spasmed at the memory.

"It's my body, isn't it?" she said, her voice barely above a whisper. Bitterness, acrid like bile, rose in the back of her throat at the thought of her fallen mentor.

"Am I to suffer under the weight of your mistakes in ignorance?"

Midoriko's eyes slid shut as if she had dealt her a physical blow. Kagome felt a twinge of guilt, but it was not enough to cool her anger.

"I wish I could take back…but such wishes do more evil than good," Midoriko sighed, her voice tight.

She turned to face Kagome, her eyes deep and haunted. Kagome felt some of the edge go out of her expression at the stark pain she saw there.

"The story of the Shikon no Tama begins with the throne war," she began. "I was a girl much like you, Kagome. I wanted only to follow the ways of the kami and to do what was best for the people under my care. When the fighting between clans began to escalate, I went on a journey to Mount Hakusan. I wanted to speak to our creators, to plead on behalf of the court for order to be restored and the senseless violence to end."

"I climbed to the peak of Mount Hakusan and sat in prayer for seven days, refusing to eat or drink until the kami would answer me. At last the First Pair appeared to me in a vision. They gave me the Shikon no Tama, a relic of our forebears lost to them in the midst of many wars, and told me that it contained all the forces of good and evil, the balance of the world, within it. They told me that it was the heart of its possessor that would decide the direction in which fate would lean, granting one wish."

"I took the Jewel and returned to the court, determined that I would use the power I had been granted to set things right. When I returned…"

She stopped short, her expression tightening. Her eyes drifted back to the statue of Amaterasu, tracing over the contours of the stone face and form as if she saw them for the first time. The lines around her eyes and mouth deepened into a map of hard lived years.

"…I told you once that I knew the man who carved this statue," she said at last. "What I did not tell you…did not tell anyone…was that I loved him."

She stopped again and closed her eyes, the effort of those words seeming to exhaust her. They carried the weight of years of repression with them, and Kagome could not but think that perhaps she had never spoken them aloud before.

Kagome reached out to her on impulse, all of her own resentments vanishing in a rush of keen sympathy. She could hardly be insensible to such feelings after what she had just finished suffering through. She clasped the woman's hand tightly between her own.

"I loved him beyond reason or sense," Midoriko said, tears slipping from beneath her tightly closed lids. "But I hesitated. And when I returned to the court from Mount Hakusan…he…he had been killed in one of the skirmishes between the clans."

"I was devastated. Certain that I should never recover. I gave in to my pain wholeheartedly, and I desired nothing more than the deepest suffering for those who had had a hand in his death. The Shikon began to grow dark, and my heart grew darker with it. It provoked evil in any who came near it, but in my own distress I turned a blind eye."

"One night, though, I was ambushed by several youkai of the court. The Shikon had built up such an aura of malice that they were drawn to it. I barely escaped with my life. I realized then what I had allowed myself and the Shikon to become…and what might have happened had they succeeded in taking the Jewel from me. I knew that my pain would only continue to feed it, and that those within the court would continue to be drawn to its darkness. So when I learned that Kaede was considering leaving the court…"

She trailed off, shaking her head. Her shoulders sagged inward and it was as if all the weight of the years caught up to her at once. Her face twisted, her mouth working silently for a moment as tears continued to course down her cheeks.

"My heart was weak," she whispered hoarsely. "I readily forced what should have been my burden onto her, hoping to put it away from myself forever. And now it has fallen to you. I wonder daily how many will have to suffer for my folly, and I begin to lose hope of ever being forgiven even as I try to pay penance each day…"

Tear-bright eyes fixed on Amaterasu's face, a resigned sort of longing in their depths. Kagome looked on in silence, trying to process the sordid tale and the fact that a thing brought down by the kami themselves was now housed inside of her body.

Certainly she had felt…something at certain points in her life. Some power outside of her own that seemed to manifest whenever she was in dire straits. But she had always been able to dismiss it as a fluke in her powers or a trick of her imagination once the trouble had passed.

Unconsciously her hand slid to her hip, the same spot Kaede and Midoriko had touched in turn before. There was no lump there, no scar or mark of any sort. And yet it had been with her for years, this thing of ancient legend. It was hers to care for and protect, hers even to use if she so chose.

"If I made the right wish," Kagome began thoughtfully. "If I could make the right wish, then the Shikon no Tama's power would disappear, right? I could end all of the turmoil surrounding it forever. Everyone might be freed of this burden and many things could be set right."

Midoriko's eyes slid to meet hers. She frowned, the hand clasped within Kagome's turning upward to grip the younger woman's wrist. 

"The risks of making such a wish are bound to outweigh the possible good to be done," she said. "Even when I first received the Shikon no Tama I was wary of using its power. Unless your heart is pure and your wish is entirely selfless, you stand to tip the balance of the world irrevocably."

"But the kami would not have gifted mankind with this did they not know that there was some chance of such a wish being made," Kagome said. "I want to end this. For your sake and Kaede-sama's. The passing of this burden should end here, with us."

Midoriko searched her eyes for a long moment. She pulled back slowly.

"I can appreciate the goodness of your intentions, Kagome," she said. "Kaede chose well when she chose you to guard the Shikon no Tama, though I regret that it now must be a weight upon your shoulders. But the Shikon is not something to be taken lightly. I will not tell you never to make use of it-it is yours now to do with as you will-but I will ask you not to act rashly. Unless you can come to the point where you are certain that the wish is perfect…"

Kagome nodded, consenting to this.

"I understand," she said. "Until I can use the Shikon without hesitation, I will continue to guard it."

Midoriko nodded, relief tingeing her expression.

"I trust you will do what you feel is right," she said. "And I will continue in my promise to support you in all things…if you will accept such help now that you know me truly."

Kagome frowned, torn for a moment between a sense of having been deceived and her innate sympathy for the woman. It was because of her that she now had another potential obstacle to contend with, and Midoriko would have continued to conceal it from her if she had not learned it from Kaede. A small, spiteful part of her even wanted to place the blame upon her for Kaede’s untimely end.

The moment passed. Kagome sighed, deciding to put behind her any ill will she was tempted to harbor towards Midoriko. The story she had just been allowed to hear was proof enough that she was as much a victim in her own way as Kaede had been.

She turned a small, tentative smile on the older woman. Midoriko's expression echoed her own after a moment, relief softening her features.

"You are too kind to me," she said softly.

Kagome shook her head.

"I have found that there is too little human kindness here in the court," she said, half-jokingly. "I am merely attempting to rectify that through my own meager efforts."

Midoriko's smile widened, but after a beat her expression slid into thoughtfulness.

"I hope you will forgive me, but I happened to overhear you earlier," she said. "It strikes me as something you might like spiritual counsel on."

Kagome hesitated. Though it was clear that she had already been found out, she was uncertain how to go about discussing her thoughts with Midoriko. She could not help but think that she would be seen as blasphemous to an authority within the court such as the O-Miko.

Midoriko, watching her face, saw the apprehension there.

"The way of the kami is not so rigid a thing as you might think, Kagome," she offered. "It is a thing of individual conviction as much as it is a set of laws to live by. I will not claim to have lived always by the letter, though I have always striven to act in the spirit."

Kagome glanced up at her searchingly.

"Then you would say…" she began tentatively. "That I am right in going against the law if I truly feel that it is wrong? Even though it comes from the kami, as well?"

"It is a difficult question. Certainly you are not the first to struggle with it," Midoriko said, frowning thoughtfully. "Nor is it a question I can answer for you. All I can say is that in the end you will only be accountable to yourself and the kami, and I feel that if you can go to that place with the conviction that you did not compromise yourself then no one can ask any more of you."

Kagome considered this in silence. Her hands twisted absently in the fabric of her hakama.

"…Did you ever feel that the law of the court was unjust?" she asked softly.

"There were moments when it rankled me and I questioned it," Midoriko said honestly. "But I never quite came to the point of opposing it. A great deal of my spirit seemed to desert me after…after the Shikon no Tama and the events surrounding it. I became complacent in many things."

"I cannot believe that the devaluing of the lives of their creatures is something of the kami," Kagome said, raising her eyes to search Midoriko's for understanding.

"I am inclined to side with you, especially after witnessing the execution of the kitsune couple several days ago," Midoriko said gravely. "The future Empress was so determined to uphold the sacred law, I think, that she was blinded to the fact that the Taira seemed only to want to test her and cause a fuss."

"There have been so few of those of common birth who have come into the court that the unjustness of the law towards them was never much more than an abstract thing. But I suppose the worlds inside and outside of the court cannot remain separate forever, however the courtiers might wish it."

"I do not think it is right that they should," Kagome said. "Rather I came here determined that they should no longer be. The people out there suffer and struggle, denied the help that the court could readily provide if they so chose. But as long as the courtiers believe them to be inferior they will never want any part of them."

"I fear court opinion will not be easily swayed on that count," Midoriko warned. "They are raised to believe in little more than the superiority of their own birth. To make them see the worth of anybody else…"

She trailed off, spreading her hands in a gesture of helplessness.

Kagome frowned, acknowledging the truth of this silently. She shrugged, moving to stand.

"I have to at least try."  
  
Midoriko nodded.

"Of course. Please inform me when you have decided upon a course of action," she said. "Until then, I will pray."

Kagome smiled, a bit wryly.

"Thank you, Midoriko-sama. I am certain I will need it," she replied.

She bowed and turned to go, catching sight of the statue out of the corner of her eye.

She could have sworn Amaterasu was smiling once more.

* * *

Kagome returned to the Tachibana residence to find that Sango and Shippou had gone to visit with Miroku. A servant also informed her that something had come for her from the Dairi and had been placed in her room.

Her heart felt as if it had crawled into her throat. She wondered if perhaps it would not be better to go out and walk for awhile, to take some time to breathe, before she sat down to meet her fate. A few minutes of wandering agitatedly among the halls of the residence, though, brought her to the conclusion that it was better to face it head on. The sooner she knew what was to become of her, the sooner she might begin to formulate a plan to reverse whatever decision had been made.

She found the piece of parchment sitting innocuously atop the pillow of her futon. Taking a deep breath, she snatched the letter up and broke the seal almost defiantly.

_Kagome,_

_I heard what happened from Kikyou. She's pissed. I won't be seeing you for awhile after that stunt. She wants you out of the court, but give her some time and she'll cool off. Until then, lay low and try not to do anything stupid, alright?_

_Inuyasha_

Kagome blinked down at the note, paradoxically stunned at both the leniency and harshness of her punishment.

She had been so certain that Kikyou would insist that she be forced from the court, but it sounded as if Inuyasha were giving her some degree of clemency. It almost sounded as if he were defending her to Kikyou.

On the other hand, she was now entirely cut off from him until Kikyou could be reconciled to the idea of her remaining in the court. She could not count on any support from him. She would be unable to confer with him, work on plans with him…unable to see him. It bothered her deeply that the latter might have been what bothered her the most.

She bit her lip, silently chastising herself. It was better that she not see him. It would give her more time to get a handle on her feelings.

It was better that she not see him.

The sinking feeling persisted.

Folding up the parchment, Kagome tucked it away in her sleeve. She sat silent for a few long moments, wondering what she should do.

Inuyasha was asking her to try to blend in for awhile. But she simply could not do that. Not after all that had happened.

Making a scene now, however, might really be the last thing she would be allowed to get away with in the court.

With a sigh, Kagome roused herself and headed out of the room. Miroku’s place was the best option for the present moment. Until she actually had a plan as to what she wanted to do, it was no use agonizing over whether or not she dared risk it.

She walked briskly through the streets of the court, aware of the stares she received from those she passed. They viewed her with critical eyes, their awareness of her position in the world aroused once more after all that had gone on. Kagome held her head high, refusing to bow before it.

She was admitted readily into the sitting room where Miroku, Sango, and Shippou all sat sharing hot tea to ward off the biting chill of the day. Miroku requested another cup be brought for her as she knelt upon one of the cushions to join them.

"Shippou has presented to me an idea that I wish to share with you," Miroku said after they had all exchanged greetings.

Kagome's eyes shifted to the kitsune, her brows raised expectantly. Even in the midst of the gloom of the past few days, she had seen the unusual silence and thoughtfulness of the young boy. Much as she had been struggling within herself, he had seemed to be wrestling with something of his own.

"I wanna have final rites done for my parents," Shippou said without preamble, his green eyes meeting hers steadily.

"He would like you to perform the rites," Miroku put in.

"Of course I will, Shippou-chan," Kagome agreed readily, realizing why he had been so introverted the past few days. "Anything you need. Anything at all."

"Unfortunately it is not quite so simple as that, Kagome-chan," Sango said, setting down her mug of tea.

Kagome turned to her, a slight frown settling over her features. A servant bustled in and out of the room, leaving a mug of steaming tea in front of her.

"What do you mean?" she asked, taking up the tea to warm her hands.

Sango frowned, shaking her head rather helplessly.

"Because they were…" she hesitated, glancing at Shippou apologetically before continuing. "Because they were convicted of offenses within the court, by law they are not entitled to any final rites. To perform them would be to go against the law."

"You can't be serious," Kagome said, setting the mug back down with a slight clatter. "Everyone deserves final rites, criminal or what have you. A soul without the rites is doomed to wander! Does the court hope to punish people beyond even this lifetime?"

"I am glad to see that you feel as I do," Miroku said, diffusing her agitation momentarily. "I had a feeling that you would. Which is why I have a proposition of my own to make to all of you, if I may."

He paused, waiting until he had their full attention. When all eyes were fixed on him he spread his hands open in askance.

"I wish to go through with the rites. It is my intent that Kagome-sama and I should perform them jointly here in the court. We will give the final rites that might be given to any courtier, and we will give them publicly. We will make certain that everyone in the court sees what we are doing."

"And you will see yourselves thrown from the court for your troubles, if not worse!" Sango interjected, her eyes wide. "Houshi-sama, you cannot be serious about this!"

"I can, and I am," Miroku responded levelly, meeting her eyes. "I know well enough that Kagome-sama and I alone, however well-intentioned, would be ineffective. That is why we need your help, as well, Sango-sama."

Her expression cooled slowly. Comprehension of his intent to depend upon her dawned across her face. She leaned in.

"What do you need me to do?" she said, and Kagome could tell that she was prepared to do whatever the houshi might ask of her wholeheartedly.

She had promised to stand by Miroku no matter what, and Sango was a woman of her word through and through. Silently Kagome admired the strength of her friend.

"I want your clan to attend the ceremony of the rites," Miroku said, a slight smile stretching across his face despite the seriousness of the conversation. "As many of them as you can convince to attend. If the Tachibana are in attendance, if members of the court are in attendance, then it can no longer be written off as the misguided actions of the common born."

"It becomes a statement," Sango said softly, nodding to herself. "And you and Kagome-chan cannot be punished without punishing the rest of us for participating."

Miroku grinned warmly at her.

"Precisely. There will likely still be consequences, but we will have made a statement not easily ignored. To give those of common birth a ceremony equal to any courtier and have courtiers in attendance would be an unmistakable assertion of our beliefs and of the legitimacy of them."

A frown creased Kagome's brow.

"It is a brilliant idea, Miroku-sama, but…" she paused, turning to meet Shippou's eyes. "Are you alright with this, Shippou-chan? These are your parents. I do not wish to turn them into merely an end to our means."

Miroku blinked, some of the eagerness draining from his expression. He turned to the kitsune.

"I apologize, Shippou. Kagome-sama is correct. I do not wish to make you feel as if we are using your parents for our own devices," he said contritely, the consideration obviously having escaped him in his fervor to at last make a stand within the court.

Shippou was silent for a long moment, his gaze turned inward as he considered all of this. At last he looked up, his solemn gaze sliding over each one of them in turn.

"You're gonna make sure that it doesn't happen to anyone else, right?" he asked quietly. "I have Kagome, but other people don't. Other people might be all alone if it happened to them."

"I assure you, it is my greatest wish that the injustices that befell your parents should never be visited on anyone else," Miroku replied. "I will do everything within my power to make sure of it."

Shippou blinked, nodding slowly.

"Then I want you to do it," he said. "My parents deserve to have the rites, and they would've wanted to stop this, too."

Kagome felt a smile draw her lips upward. She wished she were close enough to hug the child. He really was very brave.

"Then it is settled," Miroku said, his smile reflecting Kagome's. "I was hoping to hold the ceremony within three days. Will that give you enough time to speak to your clan, Sango-sama?"

Sango nodded.

"If I cannot do it within three days, than they simply cannot be convinced," she said. "I am certain, though, that at least some within my clan will be sympathetic with our cause if I explain it to them properly."

"Good," Miroku said, nodding approvingly. "I will make arrangements as to the location and the materials needed. Kagome-sama, I also wanted to ask you to speak with the courtiers you know. Anyone you think you might be able to convince to attend. The more support we have from the court, the better for our cause."

Kagome nodded.

"I will talk to anyone that I think might be sympathetic," she promised, mentally sorting through those that might be willing to listen to her. There were not many, but something was better than nothing.

"We should be cautious, though," Sango said. "If certain people catch wind of this, they might put an end to it before we can even begin. And I fear they would come down especially harshly on the two of you if they found you at the root of it."

Kagome and Miroku nodded, assenting to this. Sango might be punished for collaborating, but as outsiders within the court they stood to lose the most if they should be discovered.

Inuyasha's warning to lay low flitted briefly through Kagome's mind, but she quickly dismissed it. Whether or not she would be allowed to stay at the end of all of this could not take precedence over her loyalty to her friends and her people.

With all of the serious conversation out of the way and evening fast approaching, Miroku ordered dinner to be served for all of them to share. They ate together and shared some light conversation, all of them silently contemplating what was to happen in three days though not another word was said of it at the table.

They parted after dinner, Sango, Kagome, and Shippou returning to the Tachibana residence to sleep.

For hours Kagome lay staring at the dark outline of the little boy in the futon beside her. She wondered how he must be feeling about all of this. She wondered if he understood the enormity of what they would be doing in three days. She could scarcely comprehend it herself.

She wished that she could talk to Inuyasha, to reason it all out and make certain that he understood her. She did not want him to feel as if she were going against him in doing this. She did not want to hurt him.

But there was no way he would see her now with Kikyou feeling as she did. His loyalties had to be first to his future wife. Her chest ached at the thought, but she pushed it down.

She would simply have to stand on her own this time and pray that he truly was the man she believed him to be in her heart. If he was, he would understand her.

When she slept at last, her dreams were filled with flames and tears.

* * *

Kagome decided to go first to Midoriko for assistance with Miroku’s plan. With her recent promise of support and her feelings on what had happened to Shippou’s parents, Kagome was certain that her appeal would be met with promises of help.

She found the older miko in the main hall of the Chūwain, her head bowed low in prayer. Kagome waited patiently until she finished before she approached her.

Midoriko met her with a smile, rising to embrace her. Kagome was slightly surprised at the gesture, but returned it. She seemed lighter today. Happier.

"Good morning, child," she said, pulling back to arm's length. "What brings you to me so early in the day?"

"I have come to see if I might call upon the support you offered me yesterday," Kagome replied tentatively. "I am sorry to ask it of you so soon, but your help would be invaluable to me right now."

Midoriko's expression sobered slightly.

"Of course," she said. "Shall we sit and have tea while you explain to me what you need?"

Kagome nodded. Midoriko led her through a few hallways to a small sitting room. She prepared and mixed the tea by hand, heating it over the fire-pit in the corner of the room before serving it.

Kagome palmed the warmth of her cup as Midoriko took a seat across from her. She bit her lip lightly, wondering how to broach the subject. Midoriko waited, sipping her tea.

"Yesterday we spoke briefly about what happened to the kitsune couple," Kagome began at last, raising her eyes to meet the O-Miko's. "Well, I spoke last night to the little boy that was left orphaned after their deaths. He expressed the desire that his parents be given the final rites."

Midoriko's expression darkened a notch. She set her tea down.

"I know that it is against the law," Kagome said, forestalling her. "I understand that. But I also know what is right, and it is right that they should be given the rites regardless. I intend to go through with this, along with the houshi Miroku-sama and some members of the Tachibana clan. We want to make a statement that cannot be ignored."

"And you would like my support," Midoriko supplied.

Kagome nodded, silently awaiting her response.

Midoriko frowned thoughtfully down into her cup of tea, swirling it lightly as if seeking something in the tea leaves. She smiled.

"There is no question of whether or not I will help you. My lot is with you for as long as you need me. Rather, I am glad that I might be of help to you so soon," she said, meeting the younger woman's eyes.

Kagome breathed a sigh of relief, a smile lighting her features.

"The ceremony is to take place in two days' time. I had hoped that you might preside over the rites alongside Miroku-sama and myself," she explained eagerly.

"Of course," Midoriko replied readily. "And I assume that any support we can garner from the court would be welcome?"

"Yes," Kagome replied. "The more courtiers that we can convince to attend, the better the chance that we will be heard in this."

"Then I will approach those who I believe might be sympathetic to our cause," she said, nodding to herself. "If executed correctly, this might be the most powerful thing we could do to further consideration for those outside of the court. Grand gestures are something the courtiers are uniquely suited to appreciate."

Kagome beamed, the words buoying her hopes.

"It is Miroku-sama's idea," she explained. "He is very bright. And he wants this very much. I want it for him. He deserves to have this."

Midoriko raised her cup of tea to her lips, taking a thoughtful sip.

"I remember the boy, though I have not seen much of him recently. His father was a good man, as well. It was a blow to learn that he had died just before the throne war began," she said softly, her eyes drifting back through the years for a moment.

"His father…he died before the throne war?" Kagome asked, somehow surprised to hear it.

Certainly she had never met Miroku's father or heard anything more of him than a few words in passing. Unconsciously she had assumed that he was no longer of this world, but she had never really taken time to consider it. She bit her lip, feeling somehow that she had been remiss as a friend.

"It was a strange affair," Midoriko said. "He went out of the court chasing…something. No one ever quite knew what. When he returned, he was drained. Something had happened, but he could scarcely remain lucid long enough to explain it to anyone. After a few days he passed on. Miroku-sama took up his position."

"And no one ever found out what had happened to him?" Kagome asked, brow furrowed.

"I was always under the impression that Miroku-sama looked into it, but I do not think he was ever able to find anything. There was so much turmoil in the court right afterwards that sadly it got buried under a number of other tragedies," Midoriko replied.

Kagome frowned, her gaze sliding down to the mug she cupped in both hands. Idly she took a sip of her tea, barely tasting the liquid as it slid over her tongue. She could hardly comprehend how Miroku must feel, having lost his father without even the comfort of an explanation as to why.

"I did not mean to trouble you, child," Midoriko said softly, breaking through the fog of her thoughts.

"No, no…I just…I feel bad for never having thought to ask Miroku-sama. He has been very good to me since he brought me into the court," she said.

"Well, perhaps you might go easy on yourself just this once. To expect the world of yourself at all times must be exhausting, I imagine," the O-Miko teased lightly.

"I don't-" Kagome began to protest half-heartedly, but cut herself off with a soft huff. "Never mind. You are right. I need to focus right now. I will talk to Miroku-sama when I can."

"Good," Midoriko said, nodding approvingly. "Now, is there anything else that you need from me?"

Kagome shook her head, drinking the last of her tea before setting the cup back down.

"No. I will send you a note concerning the details of the ceremony as soon as Miroku-sama has them all settled. For now I need to go and talk to a few more people within the court," she said, rising to go.

"Then I will contact you once I have finished speaking with some people," Midoriko said, rising as well. "Do be careful, though, Kagome. You are putting yourself in a vulnerable position should anyone discover that you and Miroku-sama are at the head of all of this."

"I understand, Midoriko-sama. I promise I will take care."

She bowed to the O-Miko before heading off to put the next part of her plan into motion.

* * *

Kagome was well aware that she had few friends within the court that she could truly count on, but she intended to make full use of those few. Every courtier present would tip the balance a little further in favor of their act of protest.

After departing the Chūwain, she went about asking any guards she could find as to where Akitoki Hojo was positioned for the day. It took a few tries, but at last she learned that he was on duty at the western gate until late in the afternoon.

Deciding it would be best to wait to talk to him until he was not in the company of guards that might not be sympathetic to her cause, she penned a quick note asking him to seek her out once his shift was finished and asked a servant to deliver it to him.

Her next move would be a trickier one by far, but she felt it worth the risk to attempt it. She headed to the Takahashi residence, the solemn vows of devotion of Yuutaro's mother echoing in her head. She would need to test the waters to see if that vow still held firm in light of the circumstances, but if it did then she would call upon the Takahashi clan to show her their support in her hour of need.

She arrived at the gates of the residence and waited as a servant went to notify Yuutaro's mother of her desire for an audience. She was surprised when several minutes later not a servant, but Yuutaro's mother herself came rushing out to welcome her. For a moment she thought the woman might actually embrace her, but she seemed to recall herself at the last moment and instead took her hands warmly.

"Miko-sama, I am so glad to see you returned safely to the court," she said, earnest joy lighting her dark eyes. "I was so worried when I heard that I heard that you had fallen ill after healing my Yuutaro. And then to have to go out of the court to save those villages! Oh, but you are back now, and looking so well! Have you come to see Yuutaro? He is in the gardens playing with his cousins. He's so lively again now! He's entirely returned to his former self. He scarcely remembers what happened as more than a bad dream. It is much the same with me…oh, I really cannot thank you enough!"

Kagome smiled at the effusion of happy chatter, pressing the woman's hands in return. She reveled for a moment in the glow of having done well by the little boy, of having accomplished something solid. That gratification had always been present for her in her role in the village, but seldom was it so clear here in the court. The woman's glowing face was a happy reminder.

"Actually, I had hoped that I might speak with you, Takahashi-sama," Kagome replied. "Though I would like very much to see Yuutaro-sama, as well. I am pleased to hear that he is recovering well."

"Of course, Miko-sama. Let us go to the garden. We can watch the children play as we talk," she suggested eagerly, gesturing for Kagome to follow her as she made her way into the residence.

She led her to an open walkway that looked out over one corner of the garden. A short distance away several little boys played a lively game of kemari, their breath rolling out in misty puffs on the chill air as they romped about. Kagome spotted Yuutaro among the group, a delighted laugh escaping her as he bounced the mari off of his left shoulder. His mother clapped loudly beside her, all decorum thrown to the wind.

Yuutaro flushed, flustered at the excess of her maternal joy. He paused as he caught sight of Kagome, blinking a few times before his face lit up. He excused himself from the game and jogged over to meet them as both women settled to sit on the edge of the walkway.

"Miko-sama," he panted by way of greeting, his smile half-eager and half-shy.

"Yuutaro-sama," Kagome returned, smiling. "You look very well today. How do you feel?"

"Great," he replied, flushing slightly at the praise and pumping a slim arm to demonstrate his good health. "I have not felt tired at all since you came. I…I wanted to thank you. You saved my life."

"He has gone on and on about the peculiar gray of your eyes and how he wants his bride to be just like you when he grows up," his mother gushed in addition.

Yuutaro's faint blush deepened to a burning red. He shot a mortified glare at his mother, who continued to beam at him warmly. His look softened to one of acute embarrassment, his gaze dropping to his feet.

"I am flattered, Yuutaro-sama. Any girl you choose will be fortunate to have you," Kagome offered, hoping to alleviate some of his discomfort.

He peeked up at her tentatively. She smiled. His timid grin answered her own, but he turned at the sound of the other children calling for him to rejoin the game.

"Watch me play, Miko-sama. I am very good at this game," he said, puffing up a bit as he jogged off to rejoin the other boys.

"I love him so much," Takahashi-sama said as she watched him run off, her voice so soft she might only have been speaking to herself. "I had three other children before Yuutaro, you know. All of them stillborn. And then Yuutaro was born, and he smiled up at me the first time I held him, and I knew that he was my gift from the kami."

"When he fell ill, I could not comprehend it. I couldn't conceive of why they should give me such a precious gift only to snatch it right back. I knew that if…if he were to...die, I knew that I could not go on living. Ever since you brought him back to me, I just…I know I go to excesses at times, but I almost feel like I need to make up for those years lost to illness..."

She trailed off, her eyes sliding closed. She drew in a shaky breath before turning to Kagome with a trembling smile.

"I apologize. Sometimes it hits me all over again. How fortunate we both were…I can never thank you enough."

"No at all. The kami have given me a gift, as well, and I would be remiss should I fail to use it to help others," Kagome returned, meeting her eyes earnestly. "But I do have a request to make of you, if you will hear it."

"Of course. Speak freely with me, Miko-sama."

Kagome hesitated, wondering how to broach the subject. She wished to appeal to the woman's desire to do right, rather than her feeling of debt for the life of her son.

"Several days ago, two common born kitsune were executed here in the court. Were you aware of it?" Kagome began.

A frown creased the other woman's brow, her confusion evident at the abrupt shift.

"Yes. It was terrible. I heard that they tried to rob the Taira, and even hurt one of them," she replied.

Kagome bit her lip, hearing the 'believed' implicit in the 'heard'. She was already convinced of their guilt.

"Why do you think they would do such a thing, Takahashi-sama?" she pressed, deciding to try and get her to truly think it through.

The older woman blinked. It had not occurred to her to question it. She shrugged, spreading her hands a bit helplessly.

"They wanted the easy income, I suppose. I mean, they were outsiders to the court. I doubt they had been taught any scruples as to…"

She paused mid-sentence, her eyes rounding as realized to whom she was talking. A sleeve came up to cover her mouth as if it might hide the words she had just said.

"Miko-sama, I did not mean…"

"They had a little boy of their own," Kagome interrupted her, setting aside the insult to herself. "One who they loved very much. They had just been paid very well for performing at the celebration of the return of the Tachibana. In fact they were paid beyond that to remain in the court and perform for others after the celebration ended. They had more than enough to support themselves for quite some time. Why do you think they would risk the happiness of their son, their only child, when they were already better off than they ever could have hoped to be before?"

Kagome met her eyes firmly. The woman’s gaze slid slowly to the boys, to her boy. She watched as he played, the furrow in her brow deepening. She was silent for several long moments, her thoughts churning just behind her dark eyes.

"I do not know," she murmured at length. "It doesn't make any sense. For them to risk their child on a whim…it is not the act of a parent. Are you suggesting…?"

She turned to face Kagome. Kagome nodded, encouraging her.

"Then, they did not commit the crime the Taira accused them of?" she said, the color draining slowly from her face. "But…the Taira accused them. The law says…"

"The Taira accused them without proof. And the law said that that was sufficient to condemn them," Kagome said, her voice rising slightly. "But do you think it right that they should die for the mistakes of others? That their son should suffer for them?"

The older woman was silent for a long moment, her gaze sliding between Kagome's face and her little boy's rollicking form.

"What are you saying, Miko-sama?" she asked at last, turning to her with wide and helpless eyes.

"I am saying that I believe those people died for nothing more than having been born outside of the court," Kagome replied solemnly. "And that I cannot sit idly by while ill is done by any children of the kami. In two days time we will hold the final rites for the kitsune couple. I ask you and your clan to consider attending."

The older woman's eyes widened impossibly. She drew back, shaking her head as if to ward off the very idea.

"Miko-sama, they died as criminals," she breathed. "To hold the rites for them…You cannot. You will be punished. You will go against the law of the kami."

"That they were executed without any proof beyond their birth is not something that I can believe is of the kami, any more than any being being forbidden from the final rites," Kagome replied steadfastly. "I have been raised in the way of the kami from birth, and I know it too well to think that they would wish this sort of injustice on any of their children. The court may decide to punish me as it likes, but I will participate in the ceremony."

The noblewoman pressed a hand to her temple, her eyes sliding shut against the younger woman's words. She shook her head once more before opening imploring eyes on Kagome.

"I…perhaps I can understand your meaning, Miko-sama. I can…I can even sympathize with your cause to a degree," she said, her eyes darting about to make certain that no one heard her voice these sympathies. "But to stand with you at the ceremony…the position it would put my clan in…Beyond even the punishment we would incur, the whole of the court would turn against us if we were to…"

She bit her lip, growing a shade paler at the very thought. Kagome's ardor cooled rapidly. Her gaze dropped slowly to the wood of the walkway.

"…I understand," she said at last. "As I said, this is merely a request. I will not seek to force you to go against yourself."

Far from easing the older woman, this seemed to agitate her further. She shifted forward, reaching out to take Kagome's hand.

"Please understand, Miko-sama," she begged. "It is not that I do not wish to support you, but…"

"But you cannot support what I am," Kagome finished for her, meeting her eyes coolly. "Unfortunately, I cannot be separated from the place I was born or the people who raised me. The things that shaped me are no more separable from who I am than my soul itself. I am common born. I cannot-I would not- wish it any other way. So I am afraid that you cannot say that you would support me, if you cannot support them."

The noblewoman’s lips worked wordlessly for a moment, attempting to supply some-any-sort of excuse for herself. Kagome removed her hand, not unkindly, from the other woman's, moving to stand.

"You need not explain yourself to me, Takahashi-sama," she said. "You have only your own conscience to answer to on the count of a boy who had his parents stolen from him on no more than a whim. If this is the answer it gives you, then there is nothing more for me to say. I will ask only that you not make mention of what I have told you today to anyone else."

"O-Of course, Miko-sama," Takahashi-sama conceded hurriedly, her look deeply troubled still.

Kagome bowed and set off without another word, fighting down the bitter surge of disappointment that swept through her like a wave of soul-deep nausea.

* * *

Akihiko called upon her later in the afternoon at the Tachibana residence as she sat staring into a rapidly cooling dish of fish and broth, still attempting to regain her former spirits. The Takahashi woman’s refusal of aid, despite her obvious understanding of the situation, was far more disheartening than she had anticipated.

He went on at length about his joy at having her returned to court safely and having found upon finishing his rounds for the day that she wished to see him. He even ventured so far as to say, with much blushing and fumbling, that he had missed her and been quite concerned for her well-being when he had heard she had fallen ill.

This uncomfortable reminder of exactly what his feelings towards her might still be roused Kagome from her darker musings, and she responded to his sentiments as civilly as she could without appearing cold.

After passing a bit of time with some light chatter about nothing in particular, Kagome introduced to him the idea of the ceremony much as she had to the lady of the Takahashi. Initially he blanched as she had, but overall seemed very inclined to listen to her thoughts on the matter. After only a few minutes he appeared to share entirely in her sentiments.

His eagerness faded, however, when she came to the point of actually asking that he attend the ceremony to show support. He floundered, explaining to her in a jumble of anxiety and apologetics that he would certainly lose his job were he to participate, besides which as a lesser son he was certain his presence or absence could not matter much. Kagome's heart sunk once more.

She made a few attempts at convincing him after his initial refusal, but her disappointment was too deep to allow for more than that. He was the one to end their meeting, offering a sincere apology that she could not accept before slinking off.

She retired to her room then, night creeping up slowly. She simply sat for some time, brooding silently without even the light of a lantern to brighten things.

It was one thing that courtiers brought up to believe ill of those of common birth should think nothing of the deaths of the kitsune. It was entirely another that courtiers who knew better, who obviously understood the facts she had laid out before them, should persist in showing no concern over the deaths or the injustice of it.

Or at least no concern material enough to rouse them to any sort of action. Were they all so terribly self-interested, so stuck in the ways of the court, that they would not bestir themselves in the name of what was right?

After a time Shippou came in, temporarily dispelling her darker musings. She brushed his hair for him as he told her about the minutiae of his day with Sango, sparing not the slightest detail. She was glad to see him steadily returning to his former good spirits. She hoped the impending ceremony would not set him back, but rather help to set him at ease. He deserved that much at least.

At length they dressed for sleep and laid down in their respective futons. After a bit of his customary tossing and wiggling to find a comfortable position, Shippou dozed off.

Kagome lay staring up at the darkness of the ceiling for a number of sleepless hours, contemplating what was to come in a day's time. Her mind shied away from what her fate might be after the ceremony, but she did wonder how much difference all of their efforts would make if they could not get the necessary support from the court.

She wondered what Inuyasha would do were she to tell him of their intentions.

Yell, most likely. Bluster about how foolish she was.

But would he support her?

She hoped so. She wanted to believe he would.

She wanted to see Inuyasha.

She drifted off.

* * *

The following day she had little to do but wait, which to Kagome was somehow worse than if she had been forced to go the whole day about the court begging for support and finding none.

Miroku stopped by early in the morning to inform them over the morning meal that he had decided upon a location for the ceremony to be held. Rather, he had been offered one.

Midoriko had approached him and offered up the ceremonial grounds of the Chūwain, a site where many a high-ranking courtier had been put to rest in days past. Miroku thought it quite appropriate to their purposes and thanked Kagome for venturing to obtain Midoriko's cooperation.

He inquired of Sango how it went with her clan. She confessed shamefacedly that while she had appealed to many and brought them around to see the reasoning in what they were doing, she had yet to obtain a promise of support from any branch. Many feared, beyond any punishment that might come of it, that they would effectively ostracize themselves within the court should they participate. To alienate the other clans so thoroughly would surely leave them in a dangerous position.

Miroku graciously assured her that it would be fine either way and thanked her sincerely for her efforts. Kagome saw the brittleness at the edge of his smile, though, and knew he was worried.

He excused himself to go attend to a few final preparatory matters, asking that they be ready early the next morning to begin. They continued their meal, though the spirits of all parties were lower than when they had begun.

They were in the middle of deciding whether or not to take a trip to the baths that day when a servant entered. She bowed respectfully to them before placing a small roll of parchment down on the table in front of Kagome. She eyed the note curiously for a moment before picking it up to read.

_You will come to my residence immediately. Fail to do so and I will see you thrown from the court without hesitation._

_Fujiwara Kikyou_

Kagome's blood turned to ice in her veins. For a long moment her mind was all blank horror as she stared down unseeingly at the terse note.

"Kagome-chan? What is it? You look pale," Sango said, rousing her.

She blinked up at Sango, dropping the note as if it were some venomous creature.

"The future Empress is summoning me," she murmured, the words causing her stomach to turn over.

Apprehension crept across Sango's face.

"What do you think she wants?" she asked softly.

Kagome shook her head, scarcely willing to contemplate it.

"I need to go," she said after a beat, rising from her place at the table.

Shippou blinked up at her.

"Are you gonna come join us at the baths later?" he asked, entirely oblivious.

"I will try," she said, offering him what she hoped was a smile. It felt more like a grimace.

She passed Sango on her way out of the room, leaning down to murmur in her ear.

"If anything should happen, I will need you to care for Shippou-chan."

Sango's eyes widened in alarm, but she nodded slowly.

"Yes, of course," she returned.

That was enough for Kagome. She started off toward the Dairi before any further questions could be asked.

She scarcely remembered the walk to the Fujiwara residence as more than a blur of motion and anxiety. Her heart drummed in her ears loudly enough to deafen her and she was hot and cold by turns.

Inuyasha could not intercede for her this time. Her fate must be in Kikyou's hands.

She was admitted easily into the Fujiwara residence-once a residence she had shared, though she felt it must have been in another lifetime-and a servant showed her to Kikyou's personal chambers.

Kagome stared at the shoji door for the space of several thundering heartbeats, wondering if this was the end for her. If she would be forced out when she was only just beginning the real fight.

Kneeling, she drew in a deep breath and composed her face as best she could. Slowly she slid the shoji open, stepping inside before kneeling once more to slide it closed.

She could feel the other woman's eyes on her back, cold and unwavering. Slowly Kagome turned to meet her, bowing as low as was appropriate.

"Fujiwara-sama."

Kikyou did not return the greeting. Not so much as muscle twitched in her face. She was like a statue, cold and immoveable.

"I should not be surprised any longer by the things of which you are capable," she said at last. "You have shown yourself clearly enough to have no respect for authority or order of any kind. And yet even so I find myself astonished at this newest audacity of yours."

Kagome frowned, a thrill of apprehension sliding down her spine. She tamped it down, struggling to keep her expression neutral.

"What do you mean, Fujiwara-sama?"

Kikyou arched one fine brow coldly.

"You would go so far as to deny it?" she said, an edge so sharp it might cut stone hiding just beneath her words.

"I am not certain what I am accused of denying, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome returned faintly, though her knuckles had gone white in her lap.

The expression that then took hold of the future Empress' face might have degenerated into a snarl in a lesser woman. As it was she was white-lipped, her eyes lit by a cold flame from within.

"I had hoped you would at least have the decency to own it," she said softly, though it was clear she had held no such hopes. "In light of your behavior until now, however, I was foolish to think it. After your last…address to me, I told my Lord that you should be put out. That your willfulness would never cease if he failed to check you. I find now all my assertions validated."

She pulled from her sleeve no more than a scrap of parchment, though she brandished it like a sword.

"I have been informed of your plotting with the Houshi Shingon Miroku. I know what you intend to do on the morrow. I can assure you, though, that you will be stopped here and now."

Kagome feared she might be ill. Her mouth worked wordlessly for several moments.

"How…" she managed to choke out at last, though her throat closed around whatever else she had intended to say.

"A courtier caught wind of it and sent word to me," Kikyou replied with grim satisfaction. "The people of the court know their duty. They understand the proper order of things."

Kagome heard the unspoken commentary on those not of the court clearly enough, and it roused her slightly from her terror. She met Kikyou's eyes.

"I-I have already attempted to explain to you my reasons," she began shakily. "I am sorry that I did it in a manner that showed disrespect to you, but I am not sorry for what I said. I will never be sorry for it. The laws of this court, the value which they place on certain lives above others, are things that I can never reconcile myself to."

"The laws of this court uphold order," Kikyou returned, her eyes flashing. "They keep the world from degenerating into blind chaos. They prevent…"

"They prevent atrocities like those inflicted upon your clan not so very long ago," Kagome finished, meeting her eyes squarely.

Kikyou froze. She blinked at Kagome, entirely derailed for a moment.

"I understand your fears, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome pressed on. "Perhaps better than most can. For most of my life I lived in fear in my village, always under the threat of attack from raiders or youkai. I feared daily for the lives of my family. I know the horrors you were forced to suffer through in the throne war because in another way I lived them. I lived through days of brutality and uncertainty and chaos."

"But because we are not of the court, we cannot hope even for the comfort of the law. We are not allowed to hope for anything. I know your heart is set on order and justice. Does this seem like justice to you?"

Kikyou sat wordless for a long moment, only the slight furrowing of her brow revealing the rapid whirl of her thoughts. Kagome waited, watching intently for any sign that she might find understanding at last in this woman.

"What you propose…" Kikyou said, her voice rising just above a whisper. "What you propose would cause chaos. It would upset the order of the world and the law as it stands."

Kagome shook her head almost violently, frustrated.

"No!" she cried. "I don't ask for upheaval. I don't ask that commoners become courtiers or courtiers become commoners! I respect the order created in the world. I ask only that every child of the kami be treated as valuable. That no one be left to suffer chaos and fear alone because others do not consider them worthy of help. That no one be counted for so little that their lives are treated as expendable. I want order, but not at the expense of justice."

Kikyou actually blanched. Her eyes dropped to the floor between them.

Kagome waited anxiously, hardly daring to breathe. Silently she prayed, pleaded fervently that she just be willing to see.

Kikyou looked up. Her face was beyond its natural pale, almost vulnerable for a moment. And then, slowly, her expression closed off. Her fan spread open with painful deliberation, coming up to cover her mouth.

"I cannot allow it," she pronounced, her painted eyes shuttered as they met Kagome's over the fan.

Kagome's heart sank. She knew without asking what exactly it was that could not be allowed.

But nothing further came. Kikyou made not another move, said not another word. She looked almost unable to push any further. Kagome frowned.

At last she rose.

"I have no intention of calling off tomorrow's ceremony," she said softly.

The fan twisted in Kikyou's hand, then stilled. It did not lower.

"I will not allow it," she returned. "I will have you thrown from the court. I will see the ceremony stopped."

Their eyes met and held.

"You will do as you see fit," Kagome said sadly. "And I will do the same, Kikyou."

And she left, the future Empress unable to stop her.

* * *

Kagome did not sleep that night. She could not.

She despaired and writhed in anger by turns. She railed silently at the selfishness, the willful blindness, the immovability of the obstacles that stood against her.

There were moments even when she questioned her purpose. If reason and common humanity could not compel these people to do right, then what could possibly be accomplished by the ceremony aside from securing punishment for all those involved? Was it worth it, if it gained nothing and cost them all?

Quiet, bitter tears plagued her. She railed against the untouchable and wondered, in the darkest moments of that night, if she was doomed to run again and again into the same wall without hope of ever seeing even a dent made. Surrender, at least, would allow her some rest.

But the dawn came at last and with it the return of her reason. Shippou awoke and blinked up at her from the cocoon of his futon, reviving in her all of her previous certainty. He deserved this.

She readied him and herself in silence, making certain that their appearances at least were irreproachable. His face and hands were scrubbed in a basin brought in for them, along with her own.

She combed and tied back his hair and her own, dressing him in some of the finer clothes Sango had recently borrowed for him from one of the children of the Tachibana clan. For her it was her miko robes, as it should be.

Sango awaited them in the sitting room, her expression solemn. She was arrayed in her finest, from head to foot. Every inch the noblewoman.

Her greetings were subdued, warning Kagome clearly enough how little to expect from the Tachibana clan. It seemed as if all of their hopes of the courtiers had fallen through.

Kagome did not allow her disappointment to show, though her mind circled dizzily around the previous day's conversation. She wondered how far they would be able to get before guards stepped in to stop them. She doubted it would be far, but knew it had at least to be attempted. Surrendering without a struggle was simply not an option.

The morning wore on as they each picked half-heartedly at their respective breakfasts. A more substantial anxiety began to arise within Kagome. Miroku had promised to come to them early in the morning, but they did not receive so much as a word from him.

"Houshi-sama is a bit late," Sango ventured at last, giving voice to the fear of all three.

Kagome bit her lip, wondering if Kikyou had chosen to go after him first. She knew of his involvement, perhaps even that it had been his plan, and he was the one responsible for retrieving the bodies of Shippou's parents. Without him they could do almost nothing.

Sango met Kagome's eyes across the table. She frowned, catching a glimpse of something there.

"Kagome-chan, do you know something?" she asked, her brow furrowing.

Kagome clasped her hands in her lap, wondering if she should tell them. Shippou was gazing up at her with wide, solemn eyes. She shifted, averting her eyes.

"The future Empress-" she began lowly.

The clack of the shoji door being thrown open cut her off. All three jumped, turning with wide eyes to the source of the abrupt intrusion.

Miroku stood with the door flung wide, nearly panting. There was a light in his eyes that was a step from manic, his expression so openly agitated that Kagome scarcely recognized him.

"Come now," he ordered without a trace of his usual eloquence.

Sango, eyes wide, opened her mouth to ask what in the world was the matter with him, but he had gone out of the room before she could get a word out.

Kagome and Sango exchanged worried looks. Kagome scooped up Shippou and they both hurried out of the room after Miroku.

He awaited them impatiently in the entryway, motioning hurriedly for them to follow him outside. His agitation was so great that he did not wait for them before exiting himself.

Kagome and Sango, their fears deepening at his eccentric behavior, rushed out after him to the outer gates of the residence.

Both stopped dead.

Miroku turned his feverish, exultant eyes on them and flung his arm out in a sweeping gesture.

Hundreds of people, as far as they could see in any direction, crowded the streets around the Tachibana residence. Painted faces, flapping fans, and brightly colored robes surrounded them on all sides. They were courtiers.

"They're here for the ceremony," Miroku announced breathlessly. "They've been arriving since early this morning. I've been trying to arrange them and inform them of what is to happen for hours. Can you believe it? Look at all of them!"

"How…" Kagome began, only to be choked by a surge of abrupt tears. She fought them back, blinking hard.

Midoriko stepped towards them out of the throng where she had been standing near the bier on which Shippou's parents lay.

"Several clan leaders came to me for guidance after having heard your arguments," she said. "I encouraged them to follow their stronger inclinations. I suppose this is the result."

Kagome could not get out a single word, her eyes scanning the crowd again and again in disbelief. She saw the Takahashi, the Akitoki, many of the Tachibana, several minor human clans she did not know, lesser officials of the Chūwain and Shingonin, even some in the dress of guards. Hojo waved timidly to her from a short distance off. The lady of the Takahashi stood on the fringe of the expectant mass with Yuutaro securely in tow.

After all of their protests, their reservations, their refusals, they had come.

The wall was dented. There was hope.

"Shall we begin?" Miroku suggested once the three had had a moment, gesturing to the ornate bier.

Kagome blinked at him several times before nodding wordlessly. She swallowed back her awe, turning her focus to the two bodies resting motionless and covered atop the bier.

He and Midoriko moved to the bier, grasping their respective ends. Following their lead, Sango and Kagome took up their own positions, raising the bier up above the crowd. Shippou remained on Kagome's shoulder, his small face set determinedly.

Midoriko took up the chant first, the words of peace and mourning spilling musically from her lips. Miroku's own chant answered her, the two complimentary despite their differences.

Voices took up the chant throughout the crowd as they began to move forward down the street, the bier swaying above them all. Kagome took it up, as well, the words pouring from the very depths of her to join the chorus. She scarcely felt the weight of the bier as the crowd swelled and moved around them, propelling them forward.

They moved slowly and purposefully through the streets, their words echoing on the bright morning air. They moved from one corner of the court to the next, reaching each gate before continuing their procession. They covered as much of the court as they could.

They would be seen and heard.

Everywhere people emerged from their residences to gape at them, their numbers swelling as they went. Courtiers stared, jeered, were outraged. Kagome was satisfied. She held the bier higher for them all to see the tragedy they had wrought.

At last they came to the bottom of the steps of the Chūwain. By then their number had swelled beyond the hundreds, many gawkers trailing in stunned silence after the group.

They ascended the steps, passed under the tori, and reached at last the temple grounds. In groups the participants cleansed themselves before passing the komainu into the temple proper.

A wide area before the temple had been cleared and a pyre erected in the center. The four cleansed themselves and moved forward to place the bier atop the pyre.

A hush swept over the crowd. The chanting died out. Midoriko, after looking to both Kagome and Miroku, stepped forward and raised both her hands.

"We gather today," she began, raising her voice to carry over the crowd. "To put to rest the souls of Shintaro and Shizune. Their end was tragic, but now we will give them the peace that they deserve."

Miroku stepped forward to stand beside her.

"These two were not born of the court, but their souls count for no less than yours. They are as much a part of the great wheel of existence as you or I, and we choose to honor them as such," he said emphatically.

Shippou tugged at Kagome's sleeve. She turned her eyes to him and saw the pleading there, quickly grasping his meaning.

She stepped forward to join Miroku and Midoriko, Shippou standing tall upon her shoulder. She raised her hands to gain the full attention of the crowd. Shippou cleared his throat.

"They were my parents," he said in his loudest voice, no elegance and all sincerity. "I loved them. They loved me. And then they were killed. I still don't understand why. I don't think it was right. They were my parents. I-I miss them. Please help me say good-bye."

He was crying, trembling on her shoulder by the time he finished. All that he had worked so hard to contain during the procession burst forth at last. He swiped roughly at his tears, sniffling as he tried to put back on his brave front.

Kagome took him into her arms, embracing him and shielding him from the eyes that looked on with pity and sympathy.

"We thank you from the bottom of our hearts for following the path you know to be right," Kagome said, her own voice hoarse with feeling as she addressed the crowd. "I understand with what difficulty and apprehension you must have made the decision to come here. It is no easy thing to go against all that you have known. But I ask you to look upon the world in which you live, in which we all live, with new eyes. Do not allow the mistakes of the past to dictate the future. We are all of us brothers and sisters beneath the kami."

Midoriko and Miroku nodded their agreement on either side of her. Midoriko stepped back to the small furnace placed at the head of the pyre, grabbing from it a lighted stick of incense. She brandished the incense, waving it over the bodies atop the pyre as she stepped in a slow circle around it. Miroku took up his own incense, and Kagome followed his lead with Shippou tucked securely in the crook of one arm.

They made several rounds, purifying the bodies with the smoke in preparation. They each finished at the head of the pyre, placing the incense atop it. Midoriko bowed her head and pressed her hands together, beginning the final prayer. Miroku took up the rosary around his wrist, passing the beads through his fingers as he recited the final words. Kagome bowed her head, adding her voices to theirs.

All around them heads were bowed and hands clasped as the finals rites echoed across the hallowed grounds of the temple.

The prayers finished. Midoriko took from the small furnace a torch, the end glowing red from the heat of the coals.

She placed the torch amongst the wood of the pyre, working until it caught flame. The pyre began to smoke, small flames leaping up. Slowly they grew larger, spreading until they had consumed the pyre and the two forms atop it. The flames cleansed them, releasing their souls from the confines of their bodies.

Shippou cried silently in her arms, his eyes fixed on the growing flames. Sango approached them, slinging an arm around them both as tears streamed from her own eyes.

Miroku came to stand at Sango's side, and they shared a long look. He reached out tentatively, taking one of her hands in his own. Sango squeezed his hand in return, offering him a tremulous smile.

One by one those who had participated in the procession came forward to the pyre, placing final offerings to the spirits at the foot of the pyre or offering their own final prayers. Kagome trembled to see it, grief and gratitude and awe rushing over her in dizzying waves now that she had a moment to reflect.

And then she caught sight of her through the rising flames.

She stood alone and apart from the crowd, isolated. The substitution of plain servant's robes for her usual finery allowed her to go unnoticed. Her arms were folded tightly over her chest, her whole posture seeming to cave in on itself.

She was crying.

For the briefest of moments their eyes met and held. Kagome knew that the tears on her cheeks mirrored Kikyou's own.

The future Empress turned away abruptly, hurrying off down the steps of the temple. Kagome watched her go, hugging Shippou more tightly.

Slowly the courtiers began to trickle off in groups and pairs, the ceremony winding to a close. Kagome, Miroku, Shippou, Sango, and Midoriko remained until the pyre burnt itself out, keeping silent vigil.

When nothing more than ashes remained, they gathered them and scattered them to the wind.

They each prayed in their heart for new beginnings.


	18. Of Riots and Regrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our mini-history lesson for today:
> 
> -go: originating in China under the name of wéquí, this game spread to Japan in the 7th century.

Stunned silence fell like a shroud over the court in the wake of the final rites. No one seemed able to comprehend what had been done. Word of it passed through the court in whispers and notes. Courtiers wandered the paths where the party had marched, murmuring to one another.

On Miroku's suggestion, he, Sango, Kagome, and Shippou remained sequestered in the Tachibana residence for the entire day following the event. He was all smiles and pleasantries, amicably sharing stories of some of his more exciting journeys outside the court, but Kagome suspected that he was not quite so carefree as he would have them believe. His determined silence on the events of the previous day seemed odd to her.

Sango sensed it as well, watching the houshi closely. Both women were content to allow him to proceed as he pleased, though. They traded a few questioning glances, but otherwise allowed themselves to enjoy a few hours untroubled by outside concerns.

The following day made it clear what had been troubling Miroku.

Kagome awoke early, blinking away the foggy remnants of a half-forgotten dream from her eyes. Shippou slept on soundly, a small foot twitching occasionally beneath the blankets of his futon. Dressing quietly, she decided to go to the Chūwain to check in with Midoriko before he awoke. She had not spoken to her since the end of the ceremony.

The residence was quiet as she made her way through the halls. The first servants would be waking soon to begin preparations for the morning meal, but most were still asleep. Kagome came to the main gate without encountering a soul.

The streets outside the Tachibana gate seemed empty, as well. Kagome had anticipated no less given the earliness of the hour and the biting chill in the air. She shivered, pulling her outer karaginu tighter about her shoulders and wondering if it was going to begin snowing again soon.

She was rounding the corner of the residence's outer wall when something slammed into her hard enough to knock the breath from her lungs. 

For several long moments she saw stars, the back of her skull connecting with the outer wall of the residence with a crack that echoed on the still morning air. She struggled to catch her breath, twisting about and blinking frantically. A hand closed firmly around her throat to stifle any noises she might have made, immediately stilling her.

"Fate smiles on us, to catch her so quickly. Awfully bold of you to be walking around on your own, is it not, Miko-sama?" a voice sneered, and Kagome shuddered at the feel of warm breath ghosting across her face. "Are you so certain you have won already?"

Kagome couldn't respond. Her fingers scrabbled feebly at the hand around her throat, her vision too mottled with black spots to make out anything with clarity.

"Common scum of the earth," sneered another voice, this one further from her. "Your presence should never have been allowed here. You claim to be of the kami, but you have willfully trespassed against them. You deserve any punishment that comes to you for this."

"And…the kami have charged you directly with that task?" Kagome rasped, struggling to gain her footing. 

Her vision had cleared enough to make out several indistinct figures surrounding her, including the man who had her pinned to the wall. Had she been supporting herself, her knees would have given way.

Her head jerked as a fist connected solidly with the left side of her face. A burst of pain exploded across her nerves, leaving her breathless. The tang of blood filled her mouth as the inside of her cheek split against her teeth. Kagome's vision reeled back into blackness, her mind spinning.

"We merely take it as our duty to teach you your place, as no one else within the court is brave enough to do so," returned yet another voice. "Your debacle the other day will be the end to all this nonsense. We intend to return the court to the way it was. No longer will your kind be permitted to cause chaos here for your own ends."

A half-formed retort about the bravery of ambushing an unarmed person flitted through her frazzled brain, but Kagome had at least the presence of mind to stifle the words. She merely squeezed her eyes shut, her limbs trembling violently.

"You understand, do you not?" said the one holding her, pressing her more tightly against the wall. "We will not kill you here. We will not give you the satisfaction of becoming a martyr for your blasphemous cause. But we will have you renounce what you have done. You will renounce it, and you will leave the court."

"And w-why would I…do that?" Kagome managed to get out, struggling for breath against the pressure on her windpipe.

The hand tightened. She choked, gasping for air.

"Because we are many where you are few," he responded coolly. "Because you are in the wrong. Because you will accomplish nothing with this absurd perversion of the balance of the world. And because I swear to you, if you do not stop, we will come to you again. We will find you, wherever you might hide. And we will make you wish that we had killed you here."

Her head was growing light. She couldn't breathe.

Abruptly the hand released her. Kagome crumpled in a heap, gasping on the frozen stones of the street. Footsteps hurried away from her.

She was uncertain how long she lay there unmoving. Her face and throat throbbed, blood continuing to fill her mouth. Her entire body shook. She could not form a single coherent thought.

Slowly she picked herself up, glancing around. The streets remained empty. There was no sign of her attackers.

Dazedly she thought she should return to the Tachibana residence. She raised a hand, still shaking wildly, to probe tentatively at the side of her face where she had been struck. She hissed at the spark of pain the motion ignited, her fingers coming away stained red. He had hit her hard enough to split the flesh of her cheek. She licked dry lips, staining them with the blood that filled her mouth as she absently scrubbed her fingers against the material of her hakama.

She blinked, her mind spinning away from her once more at the shock of it. She had been attacked.

She didn't want to return to the residence. Every feeling revolted at the idea of being seen in such a state by any of her friends.

She wanted to see Inuyasha. The desire swept through her like a physical ache.

He would protect her.

But, no. She wasn't allowed to go to him. He wouldn't see her.

Her heart sank, but immediately another thought took possession of her.

Staggering slightly, Kagome's steps turned in another direction.

* * *

The looks of the servants and guards when she stumbled through the gates were nothing short of horror. Several of the serving women she had been familiar with before crowded around her, speaking so rapidly she could scarcely follow a word of it. All she could do was dazedly repeat over and over again her desire for an audience, uncertain if her words had even a semblance of coherence to them.

At last one of the servants seemed to understand her and disengaged from the group. She returned several moments later with word that she was to go to the garden. Kagome nodded, murmuring something she could scarcely recall before heading towards the garden.

She found her sitting on a bench in a secluded corner of the garden, the barren branches of a sakura tree framing her perch. She stared down into the darkened waters of a small pond at her feet with a gravity far beyond the usual solemnity of her manner.

She raised her face as Kagome approached, her eyes widening at the sight. She rose in a rustle of silks, taking slow a step toward her.

"Kagome," said Kikyou, at a loss. "What…what happened? By the kami…"

She raised a hand as if to touch the younger girl's cheek, but Kagome flinched away.

"I want to see Inuyasha," she said without preamble.

Kikyou blinked, a frown drawing her brows together. She shook her head slowly.

"Kagome," she tried once more, reaching out a hand.

"I want to see Inuyasha," Kagome repeated.

Kikyou took one of her hands tentatively, tugging it to urge her toward the bench.

"Sit down," she said. "Please sit down."

Kagome sat, still too shaken to put up much resistance. She blinked up at Kikyou, suddenly wondering how she had even arrived there. Her cheek throbbed and she could feel blood oozing sluggishly down the side of her face.

"What has happened to you?" Kikyou asked once more, her voice soft as she peered down into the younger girl's face.

"…The court," Kagome replied bitterly, the reality of what had happened hitting her all at once.

Her hands balled to trembling fists in the material of her hakama, her eyes clenching shut. She felt like crying, but no tears came.

"Wait here a moment," Kikyou ordered.

Kagome heard her footsteps trail softly away, wondering what in the world had driven her to the Fujiwara residence of all places. She caught sight of her face mirrored in the still waters of the pond and winced.

The left side of her face was rapidly purpling, a bloody gash running parallel to her cheekbone. Most of the blood on her face had dried into a horrific mask, and angry red marks circled her throat where she had been grabbed.

She stooped down closer to the water, staring hard. She questioned whether it was truly her own face that stared with cold eyes back up at her.

She was not sure how much time passed in this manner, but suddenly there was someone beside her. She glanced up to find that Kikyou had returned, carrying a tray filled with a number of medical supplies.

"If you do not treat that, it will scar," Kikyou said, gesturing towards the bench.

Kagome merely stared at her for a long moment, dazed by the surreal quality of the entire situation. At last she rose and planted herself back on the bench, at a loss for anything else to do.

Kikyou settled beside her, setting the tray down between them. She dipped a small cloth into a bowl of heated water, steaming in the cold air. Wringing the cloth of the excess, she brought it gingerly to Kagome's face.

She hissed, jerking away at the first contact with her skin. Kikyou paused, hand still extended. Kagome blinked at her, the sudden pain clearing some of the haze from her mind.

"Sorry," she murmured, uncertain what part of it all she was apologizing for. She bowed her head, offering up her cheek.

Kikyou resumed her careful attentions, gently wiping away the dried blood to reveal the extent of the injury. Her face revealed nothing as she worked save full concentration.

"What happened?" she asked at last, seeming to realize that Kagome was now coherent enough for a response.

"I was going to see Midoriko-sama," Kagome replied softly, wincing as the cloth slid over the open wound. "They ambushed me."

"Who?"

"I don't know. I could hardly see them," she said softly. "It all happened very…they were…"

She trailed off. Kikyou said nothing for a few moments, placing the bloodied rag back down on the tray and picking up a small mortar and pestle filled with medicinal herbs. She began to crush the fragrant leaves.

"I will not allow this to pass."

Kagome raised her head, turning to look at the other woman. Her eyes remained fixed on her task, her hands working steadily to create a pungent paste. Kagome frowned, wondering if her hearing had been compromised by the blow to her head.

Kikyou raised her eyes and their gazes met for the first time since Kagome had entered the Fujiwara residence.

"Whoever did this to you will be caught," she said lowly. "I will see them punished myself. I will also arrange to have a guard assigned to you. You cannot be allowed to wander on your own any longer."

Kagome stared at her, a frown furrowing her brows. Kikyou's gaze fell back to her handiwork.

"No doubt you cannot comprehend the shift in me," she said softly. "I can scarcely understand myself at times. I was so certain that I was in the right…that the exercise of the law without compromise, without hesitation, would restore order…"

She paused, shaking her head. She raised her eyes to meet Kagome's once more. Kagome was shocked to see suffering writ plain across her features, in the wavering line of her mouth and the deep lines upon her brow. It was gone in a flash, smoothed over once more to a semblance of calm, but the sight was burned within Kagome's mind.

"When I…When I saw that little boy at the ceremony," she pressed on. "I saw…myself. And I realized that to him, I was what the murderers of my clan had been to me. I was…a monster."

She fell silent, her eyes sliding closed. Her hands ceased to move the pestle. Kagome looked on, pity and uncertainty welling within her.

"Why didn't you stop me?" she said at last, the question barely a whisper.

"I needed proof that you were wrong," Kikyou replied hoarsely. "I needed you to fail, without my interference, so that I could be certain. Because I was not certain. I have not felt entirely certain for some time."

A tear escaped her shuttered lids.

Instinctively Kagome leaned forward over the tray, wrapping her in an embrace. Kikyou tensed and moved as if to pull back. Then a small tremor wracked her frame, slight beneath the bulk of her robes, and she submitted to the embrace.

"You meant well," Kagome murmured feelingly.

"What are good intentions to an orphaned child?" she replied softly. "I was blind."

Kagome pulled back slightly to look into her face.

"You saw what you were raised to see," she said, pained at the woman's unforgiving self-condemnation. "You couldn't have known-"

"Stop, Kagome," Kikyou broke in, shaking her head grimly.

"Do not make excuses for me. I do not deserve that kindness, nor is it what I want. Others in the court saw when I did not. When I would not. Allow me at least the dignity of suffering for my mistakes."

Kagome drew back, blinking at her.

"I sent two innocent people to their deaths," Kikyou confessed, meeting her eyes with quiet intensity. "I stole a little boy's parents from him. And I dismissed hundreds of thousands of people from my notice without a thought for what they might be suffering."

Kagome was silent, taking in the stark confession. The woman wanted to own her mistakes, and Kagome knew she was right in this desire. She would offer no comfort.

The faintest of smiles tinged one corner of Kikyou's lips, a grim satisfaction born of finally giving voice to those words.

"Thank you," she murmured, her eyes falling to the mortar and pestle that sat between them.

She dipped her fingers into the paste she had created, motioning for Kagome to turn her head.

Kagome did so, though she continued to watch her from the corner of her eye.

Kikyou leaned forward, lightly spreading the pungent paste over the wound.

"This should help with the swelling," she said. "It seems shallow enough that I do not think it will scar, either."

Kagome nodded, wincing as her fingers brushed over a particularly tender spot. Her nose wrinkled at the sharp odor.

"In regards to your cause," Kikyou said, drawing Kagome's attention away from the stench. "I would like to be of aid, but I will need some time. I intend to look into the court records as to our dealings with those outside of the court. I will also read over the books of law once more…with eyes more capable of discernment, I hope. I will not make another move until I am certain that I have seen the case through in its entirety."

"I understand," Kagome replied, considering this. "I would prefer that you come to your own conclusions. I will supply any information that I can, if you need it."

Kikyou drew back, examining her work to make certain that she had been thorough. With a nod, she picked up a cloth from the tray and wiped the remnants of the poultice from her fingers. Kagome, seeing that she was finished, brought a hand up to probe tentatively around the wound.

It was still painful, but the herbs had a cooling effect that was welcome. A swipe with her tongue along the inside of her mouth assured her that the wound there was now only bleeding sluggishly. It was not so deep that it would not heal if left alone.

She glanced over at the future Empress, wondering suddenly at the degree of kindness she had shown in tending her personally when there were plenty of servants that might have done the task for her.

Kikyou was reordering the tray, moving all of its contents back to the center. She refolded the cloth she had used to clean her hands, her concentration perhaps unequal to the simplicity of the task.

She glanced up and Kagome was somehow disappointed to see all of her former control returned to her expression.

"I cannot allow you to see my Lord," she said without preamble.

Kagome blinked. A blush heated her cheeks as she recalled suddenly stumbling into the residence, demanding to see Inuyasha and calling him so familiarly by his given name in front of the woman who was to be his wife. Shame welled hotly in her gut.

Still, though the blind desperation had eased, she wanted to see him.

"Why?" she asked softly, a note of pleading to her voice that she could not suppress.

For a moment Kikyou's eyes dropped, but she quickly raised them once more to meet Kagome's grimly.

"You have made an irrevocable statement to the court in performing the rites," she said. "And you know well enough that it is one that many in the court will not agree with. The backlash will come soon. They will demand that you be punished, and they will undoubtedly be greater in number than those who support you cause."

"You need not worry. My Lord will not punish you. I will not punish you. And we will allow no one else to try to mete out their own justice on you or yours. But while we can make time with the appearance of deliberation on the matter, if my Lord comes out openly in your favor now he will not stand a chance. His resources are too limited."

Kagome frowned, weighing this. It made sense, and certainly Kikyou knew better than she as to the inner workings of the court. Besides which Kagome herself had heard time and again from Inuyasha hints that should any faction of the court regain enough power to challenge him now it would likely not end in his favor. He simply did not have the certainty of support necessary to it.

Still…

"If you let me see the Tennō-sama, perhaps I could confer with his Lordship as to how to proceed. I give my word that I would not urge him to come out so brashly in support of my cause…"

But Kikyou shook her head, her lips thinning to an unmoving line.

"Were he..." she hesitated, her jaw clenching for a fraction of a moment. "Were my Lord to see you as you appear now, I feel that my Lord would be unable to keep from acting. He is not one to let abuses of power pass without comment."

There was something just beneath the words, something that drew Kikyou's shoulders tense and hardened her expression. Kagome studied her for a long moment before nodding reluctantly.

"I understand," she conceded. "I will not seek his Majesty out until you think it right. Will you…could you try to explain things to his Majesty for me, though, for the time being?"

The future Empress's posture lost some of her rigidity and she nodded.

"Of course," she allowed. "I will be certain that my Lord understands what has happened fully."

Kagome nodded, though she could not thank her. It still rankled a bit that she was being barred from speaking to the hanyou.

Kikyou gathered up the tray and stood.

"If you wish to return to the Tachibana residence, I will send guards along with you," she said. "I will make certain to have a permanent guard posted around the residence, as well. You are to go nowhere in the court without an escort. Do you understand?"

Kagome indicated her understanding and Kikyou turned to go back into the residence.

Watching her retreating figure, Kagome felt a flicker of contentment in her chest. She had known that Kikyou, at her core, was someone who genuinely wished to do right. She was pleased that persevering in the rites had allowed her to see the things she had been blind to.

And if Kikyou might be moved, so might others. Her cause was not an impossible one.

A deep ache in her neck as she turned her head reminded her that it was also a dangerous one. She caught sight of her reflection once more in the water and nearly flinched, despite that it was now clean of blood.

They could have killed her if they had wanted. The thought was like cold fingers ghosting down her spine.

They had said they would do worse if she persisted.

Kagome wrapped her arms about herself, trying to ward off a sudden chill.

* * *

Kagome returned to the Tachibana residence in a cloak borrowed from Kikyou to cover her face and with a guard of four men. A sudden anxiety for the well-being of her friends made her steps quick. Thoughts of any one of them happening to venture out alone and meet the same fate as herself-perhaps a worse one-made her nauseous.

Her worries were for naught. She found Miroku, Sango, and Shippou all safely ensconced within the walls of the Tachibana residence, playing a game of go out on one of the porches overlooking the western corner of the gardens. Dizzying relief swept through her and she pulled Shippou into a tight embrace.

A good deal of shock, upset, and anger followed when Kagome's injuries were revealed and explained. It took considerable effort on her part to convince the three not to set out immediately seeking revenge for her.

At length, though, Sango did manage to force her into her room to lie down. The noblewoman was convinced that she must be exhausted after the ordeal and certain that sleep would serve her well.

Though Kagome would have preferred to remain in company with the others, she submitted to the woman's insistence if only to gain herself a reprieve from having to discuss the incident any further. Being forced to examine the memory, to dredge up details to offer her friends, was more difficult than she cared to admit. 

Unfortunately Shippou did not come to rest with her as it was still rather early in the day. She was left alone in her chambers with her thoughts.

She laid for what seemed to her an interminable amount of time, staring up at the ceiling above her futon and trying hard not to dwell on what had happened. Despite promises from the future Empress and her friends of protection, a deep uneasiness was beginning to overtake her.

What if others who had shown support in the cause were hurt? What if she had endangered Inuyasha's position within the court more than Kikyou suspected? What if they were to catch her at unawares again? She could not remain under guard forever.

Recalling the feel of heated breath against her skin as the man nearly strangled her, she did not doubt that they were capable of doing far worse than killing her.

Kagome rolled onto her side, curling into herself beneath the covers. Her neck still ached and her face throbbed slightly where they fabric of her pillow brushed against it.

She closed her eyes, trying to slow the turbulent turn of her thoughts. It was no use entertaining doubts about what she had done now. She hadn't been wrong. She was not wrong. She simply needed to deal with whatever might come to the best of her abilities. The kami could surely ask no more than that from her.

Still, when the tumult of her thoughts finally exhausted itself and allowed her sleep, Kagome felt small and frightened in the darkness of the room.

* * *

"You have done well, Kagura," a voice drawled, the praise devoid of real warmth. "To anticipate how far the girl would venture to take this."

A noncommittal sound echoed in the darkness in answer.

"Her type hardly requires much thought, Naraku-sama," a woman's voice said. "Put something like that in front of her and there is almost no other way she can react. It's pathetic, really."

"Now, now," returned the first voice with a hint of a mocking lilt. "We cannot all be so devious as you, Kagura. Give the girl due credit for her morality. After all, it is going to serve me well. And the faster I get what I want, the faster you can get what you want."

A moment of silence stretched tensely.

"Is there a reason for today's summons, Naraku-sama?" the female voice said at last, tone strained.

"Have the boy continue to keep a close eye on her," the voice replied. "Do not move to act, though. I know the hearts of the court well enough to see that they will gladly make short work of her in a desperate bid to preserve their power."

"They will not suffer such a threat to their way of life to remain long in their midst. So we will allow them to dirty their hands with her blood. You need only be near enough when the body falls to recover for me what I desire."

"The Shikon no Tama?"

"Your freedom and mine, Kagura."

"…I understand. Is there anything else I should be aware of?"

"Feel free to fuel the fire when you can do so without drawing attention," the voice replied smoothly. "And if you should find no opportunities, be at ease. Preparations are almost complete. Sit back and enjoy the ushering in of a new age."

* * *

A moment of complete disorientation startled her upon waking. She was blind in the heavy darkness that she woke to, wondering where she was, who she was…

Slowly her eyes adjusted and Kagome regained her bearings. The remnants of the dream slipped away from her as she pulled herself free of the tangle of her futon, leaving only cold sweat and a vague feeling of foreboding in their wake.

Moving carefully through the darkness of the room to change out of her now damp sleeping yukata, Kagome made out the outline of a low window. It struck her that fresh air would be a welcome relief. The room felt stifling.

She fumbled in the dark, fingers questing across the wood of the frame for the latch that would open the shutter. At last she found it and felt it pop under her touch. She pushed the window open a fraction, greeting the cold air that swirled in with a sigh of relief.

A star-filled, moonless night sky filled the frame of the window.

Kagome realized with a jolt that it was the night of the new moon. Toga would be waiting for her.

She dashed to her trunk, quickly divesting herself of the sleeping yukata and donning her miko robes. She prayed she had not slept overlong. Toga surely would not wait hours for her to come to him.

Her hands slowed on the ties of her robes as she recalled the state of her appearance. Could she risk him seeing her like this? Did she want to?

But she did want to see him. He had offered her an ear attentive to her troubles, and she had a good deal plaguing her that she was eager to give voice to.

Yes, she wanted to see him very much.

She found the shawl she had borrowed earlier from Kikyou and wrapped it once more around her face. Certainly between it and the darkness of the night she could keep the disfigurement of her face from him.

She grabbed her bow, as well, even as her heart faltered at the thought of venturing out on her own once more. She certainly could not bring a guard to accompany her in this. Innocent as their meetings were, her character would be irredeemable in the eyes of the court should she be discovered. Toga might suffer for it as well.

She could only be prepared and pray to the kami for protection until she reached the tree.

Moving towards the shoji door, she paused. She could hear voices murmuring just on the other side. Probably servants passing by. She waited silently for them to move on.

But the voices remained. Kagome frowned, wondering after several minutes why they did not move. A motion, the sound of shifting armor, brought her her answer.

Sango or Miroku must have ordered some of the guards to watch her door. She cursed their thoughtfulness even as she was grateful for it. The guards would certainly not be leaving her door any time this night.

But Kagome was determined. She crept back to the window. It was large enough to allow her passage, and she slipped through into the garden just beyond it.

She paused there for a moment, considering. Guards were likely still stationed at the main entrance to the residence, as well. There would be no getting past them there.

A nearby tree, its great branches overhanging the outer wall of the residence, offered her a solution to this quandary. She had been quite adept at climbing trees in her youth.

She made short work of proving herself to be equally adept as an adult. It took little effort for her to scale the tree and drop lightly over to the other side of the wall.

A moment of panic slammed into her as her feet touched the ground, nearly winding her with its intensity. She forced herself to breathe for a moment, closing her eyes and spreading out her senses to assure herself that no one lurked around any corners.

The streets felt entirely empty. She chided herself silently for the irrationality of her fear. Taking another deep breath, she headed off at a sprint towards the Goshinboku.

At first glance the En no Matsubara appeared empty. Kagome's heart sank. She must have slept too late and he had grown tired of waiting for her.

As she turned to go, though, a shadow slid forward from the deep shade at the base of the Goshinboku. The outline was unmistakable.

"Toga!"

She could not stifle the cry as she dashed towards him. For a moment he seemed as if he would move forward to meet her, but instead he folded his arms across his chest and stood waiting.

Kagome felt a small twinge of disappointment, but quickly reminded herself that it was best he not come too close. She tugged the shawl self-consciously to make certain it was still in place, stopping a safe distance from him.

"So you decided to show up, huh?" he said by way of greeting.

"Be grateful I came at all," Kagome huffed, though she smiled still. "I was no small feat to get here undetected."

"Grateful?" he ground out, and she noticed for the first time the real tension drawing his frame taught. "Idiot. I'd have been grateful if you'd had the sense not to come."

He glared at her, brown eyes bright in the darkness. Kagome frowned, genuinely stung.

"Oh…" she said, her eyes dropping to the ground between them. "I…I had thought... I mean, you said…"

She faltered, feeling foolish for having been so eager to come when he obviously did not care to see her. She shook her head.

"Never mind," she said softly, as much to herself as to him. "I'll…I'll go…"

A hand on her arm staid her as she turned to go.

"You really think I'm gonna let you wander around on your own again, you moron?" Toga snapped behind her. ”Kami! You've got no fucking idea what kind of danger you put yourself in by performing those rites!"

"I have every idea!" Kagome snapped, snatching her arm away from him.

She did not turn around to face him. She could feel that he was close behind her and at that distance he would surely be able to make out her face clearly.

"If you know, why did you come?" he snarled. "Recklessness? Idiocy? What drives you to play with your own life, Kagome?"

"I just wanted to see you!"

Silence. The words hung between them, and Kagome flushed at having allowed them to escape her.

"You told me once that I could talk to you," she murmured to cover her embarrassment. "And I could use someone to talk to right now. My friends mean well, but they do not understand. And the only other person I might tell of this will not see me."

A few more moments of silence. Then the hand returned to her arm, tugging lightly.

"Come on," he muttered, pulling her towards the tree.

She followed him, head bowed carefully to keep her face hidden.

He seated himself on one root and she on another, positioning herself in the shadows to keep herself cloaked.

He said nothing, but she could feel his eyes on her. She fiddled with her hands in her lap, at length hazarding a glance up at him through her lashes.

He was staring at her, his expression both grim and…something else. Something she could not quite put a name to.

"You know about the ceremony, then?" she said softly.

He nodded, a brusque jerk of his head.

"Do you think I was wrong?" 

Silently she told herself it did not matter if he thought her wrong. She knew she had done right. That was enough.

Still, somehow it mattered.

He groaned, sliding a hand roughly across his face.

"Damn it, Kagome," he bit out.

He paused, scowling down at the ground as he tried to piece together some sort of answer.

"I don't think you were wrong," he said at last, meeting her eyes. "I get why you did it. I get why you needed to do it. But…kami, Kagome, how many times am I gonna have to watch you do this?"

He leaned forward and she watched, transfixed, as his hand came up tentatively to touch the side of her face. Her heart lurched against her ribcage.

But his hand pressed more closely and she flinched, reminded of her injuries. He stiffened, his gaze sharpening.

"What's with the shawl, Kagome?" he said lowly, gripping the material in his hand.

"It…it's cold out," Kagome stuttered, afraid to pull back lest the shawl come off in his hand.

He caught her eyes, boring into them with his own. Kagome faltered, her eyes darting away. With a growl he tugged off the shawl.

Kagome's eyes closed tight instinctively. In the darkness behind her lids the ensuing silence stretched interminably.

"Who?"

The word, so low she could feel it in her bones, made Kagome shudder. She dared not open her eyes.

"Toga…" 

Hands cupped the sides of her face, angling it up towards him as he stood to loom over her.

"Who touched you?" he snarled, his breath warm on her upturned face. "Look at me, Kagome!"

Her eyes snapped open of their own accord.

He was close enough that their foreheads nearly touched. The pupils of his eyes were wide and dark. His face was ridged with barely contained rage, though the hands against her face exerted were careful still.

"I don't know," she said, unable to keep the slight tremor from her voice. "I couldn't see them. Please calm down-"

He shook his head, jaw clenching spasmodically.

"No! No! No more calm! No more strategy!" he snapped. "No more letting these bastards get away with whatever the fuck they want! They made the mistake of touching you, now they get to pay for once in their miserable lives."

"Toga, stop, please! You're not responsible for me. And I chose to do what I did knowing full well what the result might be."

"Not responsible-!" he began, then seemed to cut himself off. "Kagome, they need to suffer. I need them to suffer. They could've killed you. I'm surprised they didn't. And it's only a matter of time before they try again. If I don't show them now that they can't do this, they won't stop. You won't ever be safe."

Just beneath the anger there was desperation. She felt it in the slight tremor that passed through his hands. Saw it in muscles wound tight.

Her hands came up slowly, tentatively, to cup his face in return. She leaned her forehead lightly against his, meeting his eyes. The anger in his expression dimmed, muted by the flush that crawled up his neck so brightly that it was obvious even in the darkness.

"Thank you," Kagome murmured, the words low with feeling. "It means more to me than you can know. And I agree that the courtiers should not be allowed to simply do as they like with no fear of consequence for their actions. But hurting them will not help. It would only embitter them further against me, and then there would be no hope. So, please, have a care for me, if you cannot for them."

"They don't deserve my care," he scoffed, but his eyes were soft as they met hers.

She offered him a small smile, feeling this was as much of an agreement as she would get from him.

His expression only sobered further, though, his eyes growing hooded. Silence stretched for a long moment as he merely looked at her, his eyes tracing over the wound on her cheek several times.

At last something seemed to give behind his eyes and he leaned to the side, the warmth of his forehead leaving hers. Kagome felt a twinge of disappointment as she realized he was going to pull away.

And then he leaned in, his cheek brushing her injured cheek. Her eyes snapped wide as she felt lips ghost feather-light over the mottled skin of her injury.

"I'm sorry, Kagome," he murmured. "I swear, I won't leave you on your own again."

Kagome scarcely heard the words above the pounding of her pulse in her ears. Her cheek felt too warm where his lips had touched.

Her arms slid around him, seeking his warmth and solidity. His wrapped around her in return.

They remained that way for some time, until at last he pulled away and escorted her back to the Tachibana residence. He helped her to climb once more over the back wall before disappearing down the street as morning dawned over the court.

Kagome returned to her room and sat mutely for a long while, the warmth in his eyes haunting her.

* * *

Kagome was allowed one full day of rest, uninterrupted save moments when darker musings overtook her, before all of Kikyou's predictions came to pass.

Crowds of courtiers flooded the streets, surrounding the Tachibana residence. Kagome got word from a guard that they had surrounded some residences of their supporters, the outer gate of the Dairi, and the Chūwain, as well. She could not leave the residence to check for herself or see to their safety as she wished.

The guards kept the mob back, but the courtiers called all day for their punishment. Even the servants could not venture out.

The courtiers demanded most loudly Kagome's removal, some even her execution. She was an easy and obvious target and had expected no less. It seemed to pain Miroku, though, and he was quiet and withdrawn the entire day.

Kagome, Sango, and Shippou did their best to keep themselves occupied. There was little for them to do but wait it out until the rioters exhausted themselves.

Things were forced to a head much more quickly than that, however. At the end of the day they were informed that the Tennō had ordered a court-wide meeting to discuss the matter, to be held early the following day.

Kagome felt a moment of unease about this, but reminded herself that Kikyou must have spoken to him. The future Empress would prevent him from doing anything brash. Likely it would only be a meeting to announce that he was deliberating as to what course to take regarding the incident. It would serve to quiet the rioters for a time.

Still she slept rather fitfully, the courtier's cries for her head echoing in the streets.

* * *

Guards flanked Kagome in a tight ring as she waited just outside of the Daigokuden. The entirety of the court awaited her within. Like the first time so many moons ago, she was to walk in alone, a sole spectacle for the court.

The Tachibana servants had readied her that morning, trying doggedly to convince her to wear a juni-hito. She refused despite their insistence that it might soften her in the eyes of the court, or at least distract them from the role she had played as a spiritualist in the ceremony.

As far as Kagome was concerned, anything other than her miko robes would have been a denial of what she had done. She would not compromise herself in hopes of their sympathy.

She did allow them to cover her bruises with paling powder, though. As yet she was certain Inuyasha must know nothing of her injuries, and she had no desire to upset him and possibly discompose him before the eyes of the entire court.

For all her earlier certainty, though, Kagome felt nauseous as she awaited her summons to come forward. The thought of being paraded before the condemning eyes of those that only the day before had called for her death, or of being in the same room with those who had ambushed her and threatened her with a gruesome end should she continue in her cause…

But the doors were being pulled open and the guards around her moving forward. Biting her lip, Kagome made her way inside.

The room was no longer divided according to clan. That distinction had given way to the divide between her supporters and the rest of the court, seated in seething silence on opposite sides of the room. Fans were still. Even the colors of finery seemed muted for the occasion.

Miroku, Sango, and Midoriko sat at the head of the supporters, staring unwaveringly into the faces of their opponents. The Taira sat at the head of the opposition, their eyes burning with an oddly eager light as Kagome made her way up the aisle that separated the two factions.

The guards moved off to the sides as she reached the foot of the dais, though they remained close enough to come quickly to her side should it be necessary. Without them flanking her Kagome felt naked, vulnerable as she knelt and bowed low before the dais.

"Your Majesty, Fujiwara-sama, I have come as summoned," she said by way of greeting.

From the corner of her eye she saw someone amongst the opposition rise. It was a human woman, someone that Kagome did not know by name or clan.

"Your Majesty, we feel it our duty to call for the immediate removal of this blasphemer against our sacred law," she said, waiting not even to be acknowledged by the Tennō.

Kagome straightened from her bow, turning to watch with wide eyes. A glance at Kikyou where she was seated upon the dais confirmed her suspicions of the utter impropriety of this outburst. The future Empress's back had gone ramrod straight, her gaze sharp enough to cut.

Kagura stood, casting the human woman a silencing glance. She spread her fan, bright crimson in color.

"Your Majesty," she drawled. "Rather, we feel exile too light a punishment for such an offense as the miko's. The law is clear in this. Execution is the only fitting punishment for her transgressions. Is that not right, Fujiwara-sama?"

Kagome nearly flinched at this blow. She saw Kikyou pale, the line of her mouth hardening.

Miroku rose to stand before the future Empress could compose herself enough to reply, his expression devoid of its usual levity. He clutched his staff in white-knuckled hands, his eyes fixed on Kagura.

"You would punish only Kagome-sama, then?" he said. "What of the others who participated? What of me, who urged the ceremony from the start? You are cowards. You single Kagome-sama out for the harshest punishment because you believe her to be without support enough to save her from it. I will not stand for it!"

"If you are so eager to be punished for your crimes, we will by no means deny you, houshi-sama," said a youkai male, rising to stand. "Your Majesty, we call for the execution of the houshi, as well. It is long past time that we ceased to indulge his presence among us."

"Then you will have to call for mine, as well," said Sango, rising with high dignity to stand at Miroku's side. "I participated as eagerly as houshi-sama or Kagome-sama."

A chorus of voices followed hers, many of the supporters rising to stand. The great mass of the opposition rose to meet them. The clamor of voices swelled, everyone seeming to speak all at once. Insults and threats flew, and Kagome felt a moment of panic as she realized that it would soon come to blows.

"ENOUGH!"

The roar rang out above the chaotic din, demanding attention.

The room fell silent. All eyes turned towards the screen.

"We do not recall giving any of you leave to speak!" the Tennō growled, his figure looming large behind the screen. "Now take your seats and be silent, or we will see to it that the next one who speaks is punished."

The courtiers hesitated, trading uncertain looks. Kagura's brows were raised, her lips pursed as she considered the figure behind the screen with shrewd eyes.

"Now!" the Tennō roared once more, his tone brooking no argument.

Slowly, reluctantly, the courtiers resumed their seats. After a few moments they were all settled and silent once more, their sullen gazes fixed on the dais.

Kagome noticed that Kikyou seemed surprised, her brow furrowed slightly. Her fan flipped up to cover her mouth, disguising the frown that was forming there.

Silence stretched for several long moments behind the screen. The figure of the Tennō did not shift in the slightest, but Kagome could feel his eyes on them all.

Could feel his eyes lingering on her.

"Make no mistake," came his voice at last, when the silence had stretched taut. "This is no trial. We will not hear your complaints and we will not pass judgment on the miko Kagome this day."

No one dared speak, but the courtiers on the side of the Taira traded indignant glances. Angry fans flicked open, waving sharp condemnations of his words.

Kagome could not suppress a slight smirk.

It disappeared rather quickly.

"As we said, this is not a trial," the Tennō reiterated. "This is an end to the chaos of this court and a beginning to my reign as your true sovereign."

Kagome froze. Kikyou froze. The courtiers stilled.

There was a flare of youki behind the screen, one that Kagome recognized with a jolt. A second shadow loomed large behind the screen and her eyes widened. Even Kikyou seemed on the verge of rising from her seat.

And then, with one fell swing, the sound of rending wood and silk filled the room.

Inuyasha's great sword, his father's great sword, the sword of honorable rulers before him stretching back into unrecorded antiquity, cleaved the silk screen in two.

The room shook with the force of the blow. A great surge of the hanyou's youki swept through the room like a gale from the west. Kagome stood slack-jawed as the remnants of the screen came sliding slowly down the steps of the dais to rest broken at her feet.

Inuyasha stood at the stop of the dais, his sword poised before him as if for battle. His eyes burned, but there was a kind of fierce joy there that Kagome had never seen in him before.

With a deft flick of his wrist he planted the sword beside him, massive and pulsing in its transformed state. He planted his feet and looked out over the stunned crowd of courtiers, seeming to meet each pair of eyes with the force of his gaze.

"I am Inuyasha, son of the great Inu no Taisho!" he roared. "In my hand is the sword of my father, Tessaiga, with which he felled thousands to protect this court and this land. I have reclaimed it, and present it now to you as proof of my right to rule!"

"But I will rule, not by the dictates of the past, not in a manner designed to be pleasing to the court, but as I see fit! As is my right as your sovereign! I will play no more games with you!"

He paused, and his eyes connected with Kagome's. Slowly he made his way down the steps of the dais, hefting the great bulk of the sword effortlessly over one shoulder. He bypassed Kikyou, who stood now gaping openly at him. She did not seem able to make herself move to stop him, though.

Perhaps she thought it was all merely a dream. Kagome was beginning to suspect as much.

But the hand that came to rest on her shoulder was warm and real. She gaped up into his face as he turned to address the crowd once more.

"Nor will I conceal my position to conciliate those of you whom it might offend!" he continued, and she felt the words vibrate through her from the hand burning upon her shoulder. "I stand with those who performed the rites! I stand with the common man, who is as much my subject as any courtier! I stand with those who hold humanity, not archaic law, as sacred!"

"And I swear before you, should any harm come to those who have chosen to stand from those who are cowardly enough to strike under the cover of night, I will rain swift punishment down upon them! Make no mistakes, with the iron fang of my father I will mete out my justice!"

Eyes two blazing suns of triumph, he looked down into Kagome’s upturned face.

And in that moment Kagome knew. He had torn down the screen for her.


	19. Of Reactions and Rifts

Time seemed to stop. Perhaps it was broken. That was the only way that Kagome could think to describe to the discordance of the moment.

Inuyasha allowed the courtiers not even the time to draw breath to argue, hefting his sword meaningfully and declaring the meeting over scarce seconds after he had finished his business.

Not that the courtiers seemed as if they would argue. Many of them gaped still, frozen as they attempted to comprehend the fact that hundreds of years of tradition had been cut down before their very eyes. Kagome might have found the sight comical, if she had had enough of her wits about her to appreciate it.

As it was, she found herself taken firmly by the wrist and dragged from the Daigokuden. The moment they were outside the building she was taken up, and in what seemed the space of only a few bounds to her frazzled mind they were inside the Dairi.

A few more tugs brought her within the confines of Inuyasha's chambers in the Jijūden. She blinked several times, looking blankly about the disordered room.

And then Inuyasha came into her line of sight, his grin fiercely triumphant, and the utter reality of the situation nearly winded her.

"Did you see their faces?" he crowed, hefting Tessaiga with one hand to gaze at the fang with newfound appreciation. "As soon as they saw I had the old man's sword it was over. They couldn't say a single fucking word. Kami, that was...that was…"

His gaze turned to her, as if he expected her to complete the sentiment for him. Some of the enthusiasm drained from him at the stark disbelief of her expression. His mirth dimmed a notch as he took a step towards her.

"Kagome…"

It was not a conscious decision. It was not even a half-formed notion.

Nonetheless, Kagome's palm connected solidly with the side of his face.

"What were you thinking?" she yelled, her anger igniting to an abrupt blaze. "How could you do that, Inuyasha! Have you any idea of what you've just done?"

It was his turn to gape, his brows drawing together incredulously as his cheek reddened. A disbelieving huff escaped him, his mouth working soundlessly for long moments. Kagome bit her lip, her glower intensifying as she awaited an answer. Her fists were clenched so tightly her nails felt as if they might puncture the skin of her palms.

"What in the seven hells, wench?" he ground out at last, his ire rising to match hers. He drew even closer to her, looming menacingly above her slight figure.

Kagome's hand shot out, attempting to shove him angrily and ineffectively out of her space.

"Don't you dare snap at me, not now," she hissed, drawing up to her full height in turn. "You were supposed to act strategically! You were supposed to give the courtiers time to calm down! You weren't supposed to destroy everything! You've practically challenged them to take the throne from you! What could have possessed you to-?"

But she bit her tongue before the rest of that sentiment could escape her. She knew why he had done it. Knew it with a certainty that frightened her. Hearing it spoken aloud was not something she was equal to at the moment.

"How could you?" she continued instead. "How could you risk everything we've been working for?"

"I defended you!" he said, his face perilously close to her own. "I stood up for your people! I even spoke the fucking way you taught me! And now you have the nerve to pull this shit with me?"

"I don't recall asking you to do any of it," Kagome ground out, meeting his eyes. "I would never have asked you to put yourself…in this kind of…vulnerable…"

She shook her head, jaw clenching against tears suddenly threatening to rise. She bit her lip hard, too angry to allow herself to cry in front of him.

"It's not something you should have to ask me to do," he said lowly, and Kagome turned burning eyes back up to his face.

His gaze was not on her, but instead fixed stubbornly on some point over her left shoulder. He was still tense, agitated, but the stark anger was no longer there.

His eyes slid back to hers reluctantly. He huffed out a breath, shaking his head.

"I'm not scared of them, Kagome," he said, with the weary patience of explaining the obvious to a child. "And it was time. You already showed you were done playing with them when you held the ceremony. I just made it clearer. I mean, come on. Did you really want me to play the kiss-ass game with them on this? To let them even think they won after all that?"

"'Cuz that's what it would have been. Side-stepping it would have been just another excuse for those bastards to ignore you and me and do whatever the hell they wanted to do."

"But you don't have enough support yet," Kagome returned pleadingly, her anger softening in turn. "You've no way of knowing how this will turn out, that it won't provoke them to open rebellion."

Inuyasha scoffed, shoulders jerking in a rough shrug. Kagome frowned.

"We've both known from the start that it was a matter of time. They want me off the throne, preferably dead, and the only question for them is when. All I did was force them to do it on my terms instead," he answered bluntly. "Besides, now that they know I've got the old man's sword, I'm sure they'll think twice before they try to pull anything. In the meantime I'll figure out something."

Kagome nearly groaned, pressing a hand to her eyes wearily.

"You did not think this through at all, did you?" she asked, already miserably aware of the answer.

He did not answer her ire with his own this time. Rather his expression grew solemn, his eyes sliding almost unconsciously over her injured cheek.

"I didn't need to think about this one," he said, so quietly she scarcely caught the words.

The last of Kagome's anger deserted her. In the wake of it a sudden awareness of his presence overtook her. That he was there, that they were alone together for the first time in days, struck her with unusual force.

Scant days had passed since she was forced to confront the nature of her own feelings, and suddenly she could not help but feel that those feelings must be somehow inscribed across her features for him to see.

Her heart began to speed up to a heavy tattoo that echoed in her ears, and she could feel a flush rising warmly into her face. Kagome blinked, her eyes dropping to her feet.

No. No, no. She had buried those feelings. Buried them deep, deep down. There was no reason to be flustered about being alone with him. It was foolish in the extreme.

But what he had said to her…the lengths to which he had gone for her sake...

Inuyasha frowned at the abrupt shift, taking a step towards her. Kagome felt his gaze on her with an awareness that bordered on discomfort, felt certain that he must be able to hear the hammering in her chest as well as she could. Felt certain, terribly certain, that her feelings must be obvious to him…

"Kagome-"

"No!"

The word escaped her without her consent, her hand coming up as if to force him back. Inuyasha paused, his brow furrowing in confusion. He looked at her, her eyes fixed on the floor at her feet and her face flushed a violent shade of red. Her pulse pounded so loudly in the silence of the room that his ears twitched to the beat of it.

He didn't get it. It was just them in the room.

So…was she afraid of him?

Suddenly he felt cold. He reached out a hand, slowly and with an uncomfortable awareness of the sharp claws that tipped each finger, to touch her arm.

She pulled back. Inuyasha blinked, his hand dropping back to his side as if it were weighted.

He stared at her for a long moment, something knotting in the depths of his stomach. He swallowed, his throat dry.

But…he'd protected her. He'd done what he had to do.

So why? Why wouldn't she even look at him?

Silence stretched painfully between them.

"My Lord."

Kikyou stood in the doorway, a frown drawing her expression tight.

Kagome turned to look at her, her expression one of relief. Inuyasha experienced a pang.

What had he done?

"My Lord, I require a word with you," Kikyou said, recalling his attention. "Now. In private."

She shot Kagome a pointed glance. Kagome needed no pressing. With a quick bow to both parties, she nearly fled the room.

Inuyasha watched her go, the knot tightening.

"Did you not think you owed me, more than anyone, an explanation of what just went on?" Kikyou said lowly, coming to stand before him. "Or did you simply assume I would smile and go along with this lunacy?

Her eyes burned as they met his. Inuyasha's stomach sank further, anticipating the anger and disappointment that seethed just beneath the surface in her. He had known she wouldn't like his decision, wouldn't approve of it, but even this had not been enough to deter him from it.

At least this reaction was expected. Unpleasant, but expected.

"What possessed you, Inuyasha?" Kikyou pressed, searching his face. A pale hand came to rest against his chest, tangling in the fabric there as if she could not decide whether to push him or pull him closer.

"Kikyou…" he sighed, covering the hand with his own. He was vaguely gratified that she did not flinch away from.

"I needed to do it. You know that, Kikyou. It's better for both of us that I did it now. You don't have to tiptoe around and hope not to piss anybody off anymore. It's all out there now."

Kikyou's expression darkened further. She stared up at him for a long moment, and he could see the anxious question there before she gave voice to it.

"Why now?"

He knew why. And she knew it, too. But he would not upset her further, not after everything he'd already put her through.

"I just…I have a reason, alright?" he hedged, well aware that obfuscation was not an art he'd ever been skilled in.

Kikyou frowned, pulling her hand from his. She took a deliberate step back from him, distancing herself.

"I understand, my Lord," she said, and he could almost feel physically the chill of her words. "I suppose I have never been reason enough for you."

She turned in a whirl of silks, moving toward the entrance hanging. Instinctively Inuyasha's hand shot out, catching her wrist and halting her progress.

"Do not touch me," she murmured, though her struggles were weak at best as he pulled her back against his chest.

"Cut it out, Kikyou," he murmured in return, leaning his chin atop the crown of her head until she ceased struggling.

Silence settled and he held her close, apologizing in the only manner he knew how. At length she turned in his arms and he lifted his head to meet her eyes.

"I want to have the wedding soon," she said.

Inuyasha froze. He had expected a number of things from her after the stunt he had just pulled, but this was not one of them.

"W-What?" he choked out.

"It only makes sense, my Lord," she pressed, her expression set determinedly. "We have only postponed it this long because of the uncertainty of our situation, have we not? Now that you have put everything out into the open, there is no reason for any further hesitation, is there?"

She raised her brows expectantly, her eyes searching his face for any sign of…of something. Inuyasha wasn't sure what. He could do little more than gape down into her upturned face.

His gut reaction was 'no'. No, no, no. It wasn't time. Now couldn't be the time for it.

But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that she was right. There was no reason for them not to go through with it now. They'd only waited after he took the throne because of his concern that going through with the wedding right away would put her in danger.

Now that he'd asserted himself as the rightful ruler, there was no reason to hold back.

No reason except his gut. No reason except a pressing feeling that it just couldn't be now.

Kikyou wanted this, though. She hardly ever asked anything of him, and she was asking this. If a marriage would make her happy, would ease whatever worries seemed to have overtaken her lately, why should he deny her that?

An image-Kagome, cringing away from him-flashed through his mind.

"Yeah," he said, the word leaving him almost without his consent. But the way Kikyou's eyes lit up sealed it for him.

"You're right," he made himself continue. "There's no reason not to. We’ll hold the ceremony right after everything gets sorted out."

The rare smile that lightened her face was as much relief as happiness, and he felt a twinge of guilt at having considered denying her this. He had promised her years ago that he would take care of her. That he wouldn't let her be alone as he'd been alone. She deserved this much from him.

Even so, a feeling of unease settled deeply in his gut as she embraced him.

* * *

Kagome's first instinct was to go straight to the Chūwain. She needed desperately to calm her frayed nerves after that disastrous encounter and shameful retreat, and the Chūwain seemed most suitable for such a purpose.

A moment of more sensible thought dashed that prospect. It did not seem wise to venture out alone in the wake of such a potentially cataclysmic event. Even though it had been made clear enough that raising a hand against her would have dire consequences, there was no telling what the courtiers might be driven to do while still consumed by the heat of the moment.

Irritating as it was to her, the most logical course of action was to remain within the safety of the Dairi for the time being. And so she found herself at last sitting in a corner of the Fujiwara gardens, however unlikely she was to find any peace there.

The chill in the air at least served to cool her down as she settled in against the base of one of the larger trees. It did not, however, help with the clarity of the reflections that followed.

She had acted foolishly. Of course Inuyasha had no idea about her feelings. Why would he? To him she was a subordinate, an advisor, perhaps a friend at best. He had no reason whatsoever to consider her in a romantic light. With the way that she had just acted towards him, though, he had every reason to consider her both ungrateful and erratic.

What he had done for her in standing up to the court was kind. Unbelievably, immensely kind. However much she might resent the exact form that kindness had taken, she could not deny that that was what it was.

But that kindness frightened her. The more he showed that side of himself to her, the more she wanted to see it. She was no longer allowed to want that, though, not now that she understood the feeling for what it was.

Kagome groaned, dropping her head to rest against her knees. Why could it not be simple? Why could she not just do what she had set out to do without having to worry about even her own feelings betraying her?

A slight rustling nearby caught her ear and she froze. Her stomach sank. Dare she look up to see if she had just embarrassed herself yet again?

She hazarded a glance and caught sight of the hem of ornate crimson robes not several feet from where she sat. Kagome winced into her knees, recognizing them at a glance.

Slowly she raised her head, meeting the vaguely bemused gaze of the future Empress.

"You sound like an animal in its final throes," Kikyou commented bluntly.

"...Sorry," Kagome murmured, her cheeks pinking.

"Come," Kikyou ordered, not waiting for her response as she turned and headed towards a bench.

With a quiet sigh Kagome rose to follow her, feeling that she was most definitely in for another unpleasant conversation.

The future Empress settled herself primly on the chilled stone of the bench. Kagome reluctantly followed suit, though she kept her gaze carefully averted.

"I had no idea of what the Tennō-sama intended to do today," she blurted, before she could catch herself.

She winced, realizing how suspicious that sounded as soon as the words escaped her. If that did not reek of a guilty conscience…

"I am aware of that," Kikyou replied evenly, surprising her. "I know that my Lord has seen no one save myself in the past few days. Nor would I suspect you of openly encouraging such potentially disastrous behavior in him."

"Oh."

Kagome fell silent, uncertain why Kikyou would wish to speak with her if not to accuse her of having somehow influenced the rash decision. Indirectly she had, of course, though really that must be more the fault of the future Empress's account of events to him than anything she could have done herself.

She waited, watching the older woman out of the corner of her eye. Her face was determinedly impassive, and Kagome knew she had to be working up to something. But what could be so important that someone as straightforward as Kikyou would have to work up to it?

"I was promised to my Lord when I was very young," she said at last.

Kagome felt herself go cold. So it was to be this conversation at last.

"I am ashamed to admit, however, that at the time I considered the connection to be far beneath me," Kikyou continued quietly when Kagome failed to respond. "My Lord was thought to be the shame of the court-a stain on the rule of his honorable father. He was a second son, an illegitimate son, a…a half-breed son. I knew my worth as a daughter of the Fujiwara too well to submit to the match. I felt my own worth far, far too highly."

"You snubbed him?" Kagome said, anger sparking at the thought. She turned to face the woman fully.

Kikyou did not return her gaze. Her eyes remained fixed on some point in the distance, her expression retaining its forced neutrality.

"I did," she said softly, and the words had real weight. "I snubbed him at every turn. I refused to acknowledge him and I publicly denounced the engagement. I perceived the engagement as a slight on me. On my clan’s worth and my worth to my clan. I was angry, and I directed that anger at him."

"How could you?" Kagome snapped, mortified as she gazed at the woman's stony silhouette. "You knew how the rest of the court was treating him! To join them in their cruelty even as his betrothed-!”

"I am not proud of the way that I acted," Kikyou interrupted sharply, turning at last to face her. "I was young and foolish. The things that I valued…I was misguided at best. Cruel at worst. But I received more punishment than even my actions merited quickly enough. I had all that I valued, every person that I cared for, stolen from me."

Kagome remained silent, though some of her outrage was muted at the reminder of what Kikyou had been forced to endure.

"I was certain the engagement would be called off after the decimation of my clan," Kikyou continued softly. "After all, I had almost nothing to offer without them. No connections, no prestige, and little wealth. Only myself, and even I counted that for little when my name no longer held any meaning."

"No one in the court would have thought it strange if the engagement had been dissolved. My Lord's honorable father had passed, and my Lord stood to inherit the throne. Dissolving the engagement in favor of a woman with more to offer was really the only sensible thing to be done."

Kikyou paused, seeming to consider her hands for a moment. And suddenly, beautifully, her face softened. A small smile turned up the corners of her lips, and her dark eyes crinkled with the warmth of some fond memory. It was not her usual doll-like perfection, but Kagome could not but feel it was the most beautiful she had ever seen the woman look.

"However, as my Lord has proven today, he is not a sensible man," she said. "My Lord came to me. He told me that unless it was my wish he would not break the engagement. He promised me his support if the engagement were maintained."

"I could scarcely believe it. That he would offer me so much when I had nothing to offer in return…It took me several years at my Lord's side to understand why he had done it. He…more than anyone, he understands what it is to be alone in the world. To be considered worthless. I believe he saw himself in me after the loss of my clan, and that he felt it his duty as my betrothed to protect me in whatever way he could. I was never so vain or naïve as to believe that he did it out of affection, not after the treatment to which I had subjected him."

Drawing herself up in her seat, Kikyou turned to face Kagome. The ephemeral softness had passed from her features, replaced now by cool determination in the lift of her chin.

"However," she said, drawing out the word carefully. "I promised myself that I would spend the remainder of my life becoming worthy of his affections, and I cannot believe that my efforts since then have been for naught. I agreed to continue the engagement despite feeling acutely that I was unequal to Inuyasha in every way that one being can be to another. But I have worked, I have supported him, and I have become his partner in every sense of the word. I believe now that there is no one more suited to stand at Inuyasha's side."

She held Kagome's eyes steadfastly. Kagome wished she could blink, look away, something, but she was caught fast. Her throat felt dry and her hands were cold against the stone of the bench.

"Why are you telling me this?" she said at last.

"We both are aware of my reasons," Kikyou replied evenly. "This latest act of senselessness may have been inspired by you, but it would not do for you to misunderstand it. I have been at my Lord's side and he at mine for years, and that carries weight beyond the diversion of a moment. Do you comprehend me, Kagome?"

Kagome's stomach twisted, though she was aware that was more her own fault than Kikyou's. This was a mere statement of facts. A clarification. If it hurt, Kagome could only blame the foolishness of her own feelings.

So she bit her tongue, swallowed her bitterness, and forced herself to nod.

"I understand, Fujiwara-sama," she managed. "Though, I can assure you it is unnecessary. I…I suffer no delusions as to the motives of the Tennō-sama."

There was a pause from Kikyou, though Kagome dared not look up to observe the older woman. What she had said was no lie, but it cost her deeply to say it aloud. She feared that she did not have the energy to conceal the suffering that she could feel writ deeply across her features.

A hand was laid lightly atop her own. Kagome stared at it, resenting the delicate paleness of the skin and fingers against the roughness of her own and resenting herself for the pettiness of her own feelings. She felt miserable.

"I am glad, Kagome," the future Empress said softly. "I do not want any unnecessary barriers between us, not when we have finally come to a point where we might truly be of use to one another."

Kagome's stomach twisted further in upon itself. She grimaced silently.

"Besides which, my Lord and I have come to the decision that it would be best to go through with our wedding as soon as circumstances allow. It would please us both, I think, to have your wholehearted support in the matter."

The hand slid away from hers and the rustling of silks echoed as the woman stood.

"Do not stay out too long," her voice advised, seemingly from a great distance. "It is cold, and it looks as if it will snow soon. You might catch a chill."

Footsteps trailed lightly away.

She was right. It was cold.

* * *

It took several minutes to for Kagome to realize that it had indeed begun to snow. Flakes covered her hair, shoulders, eyelashes.

Still Kagome sat, staring blankly as the world around her was obscured beneath a layer of stark white.

True to the future Empress's warning, Kagome felt terrible upon awaking the following morning. Whether the cause was more physical or emotional was hard to say, but her misery was acute as she languidly combed out hair matted from a night of restless turning and shrugged into her robes. For good measure she made certain to cover the bruises on her face and throat with paling powder once more, unwilling that anyone in the court should be given the satisfaction of seeing them.

For a moment she was half-tempted to remain with the relative safety of her room in the Fujiwara residence for the day in the hopes of avoiding contact with anyone save the servants who might bring her her meals.

That notion was discarded rather quickly. Besides seeming slightly childish, it was also counterproductive. The last thing Kagome needed was more time on her own to dwell on the events of the previous day. Thus her misery drove her out into the court, determined to begin to sort out the chaos that Inuyasha's actions had undoubtedly wrought.

After gathering a guard for herself, Kagome decided that her first stop had best be the Tachibana residence. The snowy streets were filled with courtiers milling about, drawn out both by the fresh snow and the remaining confusion of the previous day. Everyone seemed to be waiting with baited breath to see what would come next. To determine what course of action should be taken based on what came next.

Between the hood of the thick cloak she wore and the ring of guards, Kagome managed to pass among them relatively unnoticed. The guards took up position at the entrance to the Tachibana residence and Kagome was ushered inside by a servant.

A blur of red hair and blue robes came flying at her as soon as Kagome entered the embroidery room to which she had been brought. She just barely managed to catch the young kitsune before he collided with her, laughing as he wrapped small arms tightly about her neck.

"Kagome! Where've you been? Why did that dog drag you away like that?" Shippou asked hurriedly, then wrinkled his nose as he pulled back from her a bit. "You should take a bath, Kagome. You smell like mutt."

Kagome frowned, her initial joy at seeing him rapidly dimming.

"Now, Shippou-chan, that's not a very nice thing to say," she scolded. "His Majesty is the Tennō-sama and deserves your respect. And I do not smell."

Shippou frowned petulantly, clinging to her neck and refusing to apologize. He seemed to resent deeply Inuyasha's being allowed to have made claims both on her time and her scent, both of which so rightfully belonged to himself.

Sango sat eyeing her from across the room, the intricate bit of silk she had been embroidering set down in her lap. She did not smile and she did not rise to greet her friend. This boded ill as to her mood, and Kagome wondered if Shippou's resentment was catching somehow.

"Sango-sama," she said at last, when silence had stretched between them for an awkward length. She bowed, realizing only afterward how ridiculous the gesture was in light of their close friendship. Still, the look the noblewoman was giving her brought back all her former feelings of deference.

"I am hurt," Sango said at last, not one to mince words. "Obviously you knew quite well that the 'guard' who accompanied us on your first assignment was none other than the Tennō-sama. You seem quite close. Tell me, is there anything else you have hid? For I confess I feel quite foolish having been kept in the dark as to exactly the extent of the interest the Tennō-sama has in you."

Kagome frowned, her heart sinking.

"Sango-sama, it was not like that," she said, setting Shippou down and going to the woman.

She knelt down at her side, placing a hand on her arm. The last thing she needed at the moment was to have her friends angry with her, as well.

"It was never a matter of trust," she protested, trying to catch her friend's gaze. "I simply thought I was not allowed to reveal his Majesty. After all, his Majesty went out of his way to look after me on that journey because he knew I was vulnerable. Besides which, at the time I knew no better than you who his Majesty was. Please, Sango-sama, you must believe that I would never treat your friendship so lightly."

Sango cast her a reluctant glance, her eyes darting away quickly to fix on the other side of the room. Her look softened a bit, but the edge of resentment remained in the quirk of her brows.

"And what of yesterday's events?" she said. "You failed to tell either Houshi-sama or myself what was to happen, though I think the enormity of it might have warranted a warning at least."

"I knew nothing of what was to happen until it was already too late," Kagome said.

Sango turned an incredulous look on her. Kagome met it openly.

"Truly?" she said, surprised. "But it was obviously done on your behalf. Why would his Majesty have failed to tell you?"

Kagome flushed slightly, embarrassed that even spectators had been able to read Inuyasha's intent. She forced herself to shake her head.

"His Majesty knew I would not approve of such drastic measures," she sighed. "And while I am certain his Majesty had my plight in mind to some extent, I am equally certain that there must have a number of other reasons behind the decision that were far more pressing."

Sango scoffed, offering her a wry look.

"You believe that no more than I do, Kagome," she said archly.

The flush deepened and Kagome averted her eyes.

"Well, I promise I will tell you anything you might wish to hear," she said, determined to steer away from that very sore subject. "Only please forgive me. And allow me to prove how deeply I trust you by asking a great favor of you."

Sango nodded, her face growing curious as she gestured for Kagome to continue. Shippou, seeing the conflict was passed, scrambled up into Kagome's lap to claim his fair share of attention. She stroked his hair as she spoke.

"In light of recent events, his Majesty is in a rather precarious position. And while I do believe that his Majesty is capable of taking care of himself, I would like to take a few precautionary measures. If possible, I would like to ask your clan to serve as his Majesty's personal guards for the time being. You are the only ones I trust enough to serve his Majesty faithfully, and you are all of you well suited to the task."

Sango smiled, a tinge of pride squaring her shoulders.

"Of course," she said readily. "The Tachibana are likely the best suited to guard the Tennō-sama out of all the clans. I would be glad to hand pick some of the most trustworthy to serve."

"I appreciate it," Kagome said sincerely. "I know I can be at ease with anyone chosen by you."

Sango grinned, reaching over to pat her hand and signal that she was forgiven for her transgressions.

"Now, you will tell me everything that has gone on behind that screen, one detail at a time."

* * *

For the better part of three hours, Kagome did exactly that. She told Sango of her adventures and struggles with the Tennō in detail, going even so far as to include his having followed her out of the court when she went to rescue her village.

If there was any aspect that she was less than forthcoming about, it was her own feelings concerning the hanyou. Not out of any lack of trust, but rather because she could not bring herself to think about them anymore. Not after all that Kikyou had shared with her the previous day, which still weighed heavily in the back of her mind.

She knew that Sango suspected, though. She made pointed notice of her seeming closeness to the Tennō several times, despite Kagome's insistence that there was nothing between them beyond the relationship of subject to ruler. Even Kagome was aware, however, of how hollow the words sounded in light of the facts. Thankfully Sango was merciful enough to never push too hard on the matter.

At length, when the stories were finished and the midday meal had been consumed, Kagome begged leave to attend to her next errand of the day. Sango allowed it, saying that she had best begin to inquire among her clan as to suitable guards for the Tennō. Shippou pleaded shamelessly to be allowed to accompany Kagome, to which she agreed. It was obvious that he had missed her lately, and he would be no hindrance where she needed to go next.

They were waylaid in a relatively empty side-street, however, on the way to the Chūwain. At first Kagome's view was obstructed by the ring of guards around her, but she soon recognized the voice demanding so insistently to be allowed access to her.

It was Kouga. He grinned wolfishly at her when she instructed the guards to move aside, moving in to wrap her in an embrace that she sidestepped deftly. The wolf Lord informed her with surprising tact that he had something to give her regarding his assignment. Taking this hint that privacy was needed, she encouraged him to come along to the Chūwain with her. They took the long way there, making use of small side streets in order to keep from being spotted together.

Midoriko greeted them there, the temple rather empty despite the activity of the streets. Kagome asked if she might have a few moments alone with Kouga to discuss a pressing matter. Midoriko agreed readily enough, though she cast Kouga a questioning glance. She led them to a tea room in the left wing of the Chūwain, and even offered to take Shippou on a full tour of the premises while they tended to their business.

Kagome agreed gratefully, sensing the already mounting tension between the two youkai. Thus Shippou reluctantly went off with the O-Miko, leaving the two alone.

Kouga produced something from some hidden pocket in his furs, offering it up like a trophy to Kagome. She took it, finding that it was a small, sheathed dagger. It was beautifully ornate, a small jade stone crowning the pommel. But the truly remarkable thing about it was the carving adorning the sheath. It was familiar somehow.

"There's a whole room in the Taira residence filled with weapons like that," Kouga explained. "They've all got the same carving on them and they smell strange. Different. And the whole room's got some sort of charm on it. Like it…it reflects the things around it to hide itself, so it looks like a part of the walkway. Like a mirror."

"How did you manage to find it?" Kagome asked, studying the intricate detail work of the sheath as she turned it over in her hands.

"I smelled the weird scent of the weapons on that one pale kid who never talks," Kouga explained with a shrug. "I followed the scent and caught her coming out of what looked like one of the walls. Then I tried it myself…"

He shrugged once more, though his eyes were bright with the expectation of praise as they fixed on her.

"A pale girl?" Kagome murmured to herself, trying to recall someone fitting that description within the Taira clan. "Who...?"

"Name's Kanna, I think," Kouga supplied, attempting once more to gain her attention.

"Kanna!" Kagome said, the name sparking a memory of the women's outing. "Kanna had a mirror with this same symbol on it! And…"

She paused, struggling to bring another memory to the forefront. She knew, just knew, she had seen the same carving somewhere else. She could form a vague picture of the sword on which she had seen it, but where had the sword been?

Kagome's eyes widened. Inu no Taisho. The same image had been carved into the hilt of a sword thrust into the body of Inu no Taisho.

"By the kami," she breathed, realizing that she had in her hands a definite link between the death of the former Tennō and the Taira.

"What?" Kouga said, unaware of the true value of what he had brought to her beyond its being suspicious.

Kagome glanced up at him, shaking her head after a moment. To share all this with the wolf Lord would likely be a mistake. He was hardly known for his discretion, after all.

"Thank you, Kouga-sama," she said, tucking the dagger away in an inner fold of her robes. "You have done me a great service in bringing this."

She offered him a smile. He did not offer one back.

"You look worried," he commented with unusual insight. Her smile faltered.

"Is it what the mutt did the other day?" he asked. "'Cuz I'm more than willing to kick the crap out of him, Tennō or whatever."

"I wish you would not speak of his Majesty in that manner," Kagome sighed, bringing a hand to her head. "It certainly is neither helpful to nor appreciated by me. And besides, it is not that that I am worried about. At least, not at the moment."

Which was true enough. At the moment she felt the dagger like a brand against her skin, all of her thoughts swirling around it. What was to be done? She needed to inform Inuyasha. And something had to be done about the Taira, but outright aggression against them was out of the question. Inuyasha simply did not have the support to match them and theirs. But where was more support to be…

"Stop thinking," came a voice at her ear, a hand sliding over one of her own. "Just for a second, okay?"

Kagome turned her head sharply to glare at him, certain that he was attempting to take advantage. The genuine concern she saw in his face brought her up short.

"I can't stop," she said softly. "There's too much to think about. There's too many problems…"

"Fine, then," Kouga huffed. "One by one is how every enemy is brought down. Go."

"The Tennō-sama needs more support, but I am not certain where to find it," Kagome said, her mouth working almost without her consent at the sudden prompt.

"That's an easy one," Kouga scoffed, and Kagome raised an incredulous brow. "Can't find any inside, go outside. Court's not the whole world. There are way more people out there than in here."

Kagome gaped at him. And then a disbelieving laugh welled up in her throat and her arms went around him.

"You are brilliant, Kouga-sama!" she cried. "It's perfect! By the kami, I cannot believe it never occurred to me…"

Kouga, not particularly seeing the genius of the idea, gladly accepted nonetheless this gratitude he had been expecting since the beginning of the meeting. His arms went around her, though his nose wrinkled at the scent of the mutt on her.

Kagome pulled back a few moments later, blinking as another thought occurred to her.

"Would you do it, Kouga-sama?" she asked seriously. "I believe you have gotten as far as you can with the Taira without endangering yourself, and you could return to your clan at last. Besides which, there cannot be anyone who knows the youkai outside the court better than yourself."

Kouga frowned, feeling that the gratitude had been far too short-lived in this instance. He pulled back from the embrace in turn to meet her eyes.

"You honestly think I stuck around here this long just to leave without you?" he groused. "Besides, Kagome, this is a hell of a lot more to ask than just sniffing around the Taira. You're asking me to put my whole clan at risk by going around to the other youkai. Some of them will see loyalty to the court as a betrayal to the code that clans on the outside live by. You want me to do this, I need you to offer me something solid."

Kagome frowned, dropping her gaze when his became too intent for her to meet it.

"As I have said before, I do not think I can offer you anything that you might want from me," she said softly, uncomfortably aware of what exactly he wanted from her.

"Can't or won't, Kagome?" he snapped with a rare note of pique to his tone. "Are you really so attached to that mutt that you can't think of anyone else?"

That one stung. Kagome flinched, feeling that she had been instantaneously pierced to the core. Memories of the previous day's conversation with Kikyou welled up and the sting bloomed into full fledged pain.

Was he right? Was she still allowing herself to be so blinded by her feelings for Inuyasha that she could think of nothing else?

She knew the answer, however little she liked it. Her reaction to all that had happened told the story clearly enough. Despite her best efforts and intentions, she was failing miserably.

She glanced up at Kouga, eyeing him a bit resentfully. While aware that her feelings were hardly his fault, it was hard not to be slightly angry that he was prodding at them.

As she continued to look at him, though, another thought slowly took hold of her. Perhaps he was right on more than one count. Was she not merely refusing to try and give her feelings to a more likely object? Might that not be more effective than simply trying to bury and ignore her feelings for Inuyasha?

And was not Kouga the perfect candidate? He had been open about his feelings for her since first they had met and had been working to win her affections since then.

With the echoes of Kikyou's announcement the previous day still ringing in the back of her mind, Kagome could not help but wonder what reason there was not to try and return Kouga's affections.

"Alright," Kagome said at last, nodding.

Kouga frowned for a moment, uncertain of her meaning. A few moments passed and it hit him all at once, his eyes widening. He leaned forward, then back, then forward once more, seeming completely at a loss for words.

"Alright?" he echoed, his voice cracking a bit on the word. "Alright? You mean…"

"I mean, I would like to try to…to return your affections," Kagome supplied for him, flushing at the sound of the words spoken aloud. "After all, you have more than earned the opportunity and…and there is nothing to stand between the two of us if we do not wish it."

"So you're really not hung up on the mutt?" he asked, and the hope in his voice made her squirm inwardly.

"How could I be?" she replied quietly, unable to meet his eyes.

"Kami, Kagome," she heard, and then his arms were around her.

Kagome tensed, instinctively moving to pull away. She forced herself to stop, though. To allow herself to feel the warmth of his arms and appreciate the safety they offered. More than one sort of safety, at that.

The embrace did not unnerve her or set her pulse racing. Maybe that was best. She did not need her focus stolen or her mind muddled. Maybe a relationship with Kouga was best. She just needed to put a little effort into it. Feelings changed all the time. Surely she could change hers.

"You'll come with me then?" Kouga murmured into her hair.

Kagome felt a bit shaken at the absolute happiness she could hear in his voice. She bit her lip, hesitating.

"I will," she answered at length. "But I will need some time. I want to make certain that things are stable here before I go. Do you think you could go out ahead of me and begin to talk to the youkai clans? I promise I will follow as soon as I feel that I can."

He pulled back a bit from her, taking her face between both hands. He grinned so widely he was nearly laughing, leaning down to kiss her on the forehead.

"As long as I know you're coming after me, I'll leave whenever you want me to," he said readily. "I knew you'd come around, Kagome."

"Yes, well…I need to speak with the O-Miko-sama now, if you do not mind," said Kagome, growing more and more uneasy at his blatant joy.

"Oh."

He pulled back, looking a bit disappointed. She offered him what she hoped was an apologetic smile, which seemed to conciliate him. He leaned in to give her another quick peck on the forehead before rising to stand.

"Right. I'll go get ready to head back to my clan," he said. "They'll be glad to hear that you're coming. I'll try to come to see you before I set off tomorrow morning."

Kagome nodded. She offered him an awkward wave as he exited the room, his grin wider than she could ever recall having seen it.

She let out a breath once he was clear of the room, sagging where she sat. She felt awful. He looked so happy. Was it unfair to him that she could only attempt to return his affections when he seemed so wholly invested in the idea already?

But, no. She had already given her word and she would certainly be faithful to it. Kouga was very kind to her and there was no reason that her feelings should not turn towards him if they were given time together away from the court. Certainly if given time and encouragement she should be able to warm to him…

She could already foresee difficulty in being allowed to leave the court, though. Inuyasha despised the wolf Lord and had proven twice already his reluctance to allow her outside the range of his immediate protection. Kagome could hardly imagine how she would manage to get him to agree to it.

Although, he would soon be busy with plans for his wedding. What would he need her for then? Surely he could spare her while that went on. Perhaps if she timed it correctly she could leave in time to miss the ceremony…

Kagome sighed, shaking her head. She would think about all of this later. There were more pressing issues to attend at the moment.

She stood and went to seek out Midoriko and Shippou, feeling thoroughly low.

* * *

Kagome's errand with Midoriko was simple enough, despite the way in which it had been complicated by the wolf Lord. She simply wished to inquire about the nature of the screen that Inuyasha had torn down and its significance to the Tennō's rule. And more importantly, whether the O-Miko believed that Inuyasha had blasphemed in any way by having torn it down.

Thankfully Midoriko was able to relieve her of at least that worry, explaining that the use of the screen was tied more to tradition than religion. It was meant to shield the eyes of those not deemed worthy or those unable to bear the sight of the kami housed within the person of the Tennō originally, though it had long since been regarded merely as a tool by which the Tennō could choose those with whom he associated most closely.

In tearing it down Inuyasha had certainly done away with a long-held symbol of the throne's authority, Midoriko explained, but he had asserted a new one in the form of his own person. In asserting his right to break tradition, he had taken all the power into his own hands. He was no less a vessel of the kami for it, but he was far more vulnerable in offering himself up openly to the scrutiny of all.

Personally, Midoriko said, she quite admired him for what he had done. She thought it bold that he was willing to try and rule based entirely on his own strength. Kagome was relieved to hear it, certain as she was that the support of religious authorities would be invaluable to Inuyasha in times to come. She asked the O-Miko the favor of sharing her opinion and explanation with anyone who seemed receptive to it. With those who did not, as well. Any show of faith or support might help to sway public opinion at this point.

Midoriko agreed gladly, asking the younger miko to pass along her pledge of support to the Tennō. Kagome promised that she would, though she did not look forward to her next encounter with the man.

Afterwards she took Shippou back with her to the Fujiwara residence. Thankfully Kikyou seemed to be out -perhaps planning for her impending nuptials, Kagome thought with a tinge of bitterness-and Kagome ordered a bath for the two of them. Shippou was now complaining that she stunk of wolf.

Once they were both thoroughly clean and stenchless, she ordered a meal and managed to convince herself to put off her visit to see Inuyasha until the next morning. The dagger Kouga had given her now sat atop a trunk of clothes, no longer pressing insistently against her. And it would still be there in the morning for her to present it to the hanyou. It was not cheerful news to deliver, after all, and could affect him no more at the moment than on the morrow.

Thus they went to bed early, Kagome making a valiant effort not to think about a great many things.

* * *

Kagome's deep-seated reluctance about going to see the Tennō did not vanish with the morning light. She had the morning meal brought for herself and Shippou and waged a silent debate as they ate as to whether or not she could in good conscience put off the meeting any longer.

But the dagger still sat atop the trunk, a glaring reminder of what needed to be done. Kagome knew that, were their positions reversed, she would likely resent knowing he had hesitated to tell her of something of this magnitude. Inuyasha certainly acted like he did not care much either way about his father, but Kagome knew that was not really the case.

Besides which, it was not the news itself that made her hesitate. While it was awful, it was not as if she had never been forced to share bad news with him before. They had had their fair share of difficult talks since she had come into the court.

It was something else. Something she did not particularly want to examine too closely.

After a ridiculously drawn out meal, Kagome decided that putting it off any longer would be both cowardly and unconscionable. She also decided that taking Shippou along with her would serve as a helpful sort of buffer against anything really unpleasant.

She dressed the both of them and tucked the dagger back away beneath her robes. Steeling herself, she set off for Inuyasha's chambers.

Guards that she did not recognize as members of the Tachibana allowed her in, and Kagome made a mental note to check in with Sango. Inuyasha was far too vulnerable at this point in time for his personal guards to be anything other than hand-picked.

The screen had disappeared from this room, as well. Inuyasha sat bent over his desk in the corner, staring hard at some piece of parchment spread out over it. His left ear twitched towards them as they entered and he lifted his head.

He scowled.

"What are you doing here? Didn't hit me enough last time?"

Kagome bit her lip to keep from groaning, hefting Shippou in her arms like a shield. Of course he was still angry about last time. As if this meeting was not going to be uncomfortable enough already.

"I need to speak with you, Tennō-sama," she said softly, taking just one more step into the room from her place in entryway.

Somehow the words seemed to anger him further, though Kagome had felt them innocuous enough while speaking.

He rose and moved toward her until he loomed close enough to glare down into her face. And for a long moment he did, simply staring hard down at her as if to test something.

Until, that is, Shippou managed to get close enough to bite one of his hands.

Inuyasha jerked back, more in surprise than actual pain, and stared at the thing glaring from the safety of Kagome's arms. He hadn't noticed it before.

"What in the hell-"

"Leave Kagome alone, you bully!"

And in that moment Kagome knew that bringing Shippou had been a mistake.

"Shippou-chan, be polite to the Tennō-sama," she murmured tensely, drawing the kitsune closer to her and farther from the hanyou's wrath. "Tennō-sama, this is Shippou. You met him once before. And he apologizes for being rude, right, Shippou-chan?"

Shippou murmured something that was most definitely not an apology. Inuyasha scoffed bitterly, his glare alternating between the both of them now.

"So what, now you need to bring a body guard to come talk to me?" he snarked, with real edge to the words.

"I am responsible for his care. I did not want to leave him alone at the Fujiwara residence," she answered, comforting herself with the fact that it was really only a half-lie.

Inuyasha clearly did not believe this, continuing to glare balefully at the pair of them. Kagome dropped her gaze, deeply uncomfortable.

At length Inuyasha dropped down amidst a pile of cushions, his form tense with angry resignation. He affected a careless sprawl, refusing to look at her any longer.

"What did you come here for, Kagome? Kami knows you couldn't get away fast enough last time."

She flushed at the reminder, struggling to keep some semblance of composure and not run out again this time. She did not want to be here, not after Kikyou and the screen and Kouga and her feelings…

She took a deep breath, forcing herself to move further into the room. She set Shippou, still glaring as fiercely as one might manage with such childish features, down on a cushion and pulled the dagger from her robes.

Silently she offered it up for Inuyasha's inspection.

He sat up straight, his gaze sharpening on the dagger. Immediately he was up again, looking her over from head to toe.

"What happened? Who was it?"

Kagome shook her head, holding out the dagger for him to take.

"No, no," she said. "Nothing happened. This was brought to me and I knew I had to bring it to you. It's important."

Inuyasha looked her over a moment longer, making certain. Then he took the dagger, turning it over uncomprehendingly.

"What?" he asked, frowning at her. "It's just a dagger. Smells a little weird."

"The sheath," Kagome said, pointing to it. "Don't you recognize it?"

Inuyasha shrugged. Kagome sighed. She had hoped he would get it on his own so that there would be no need of an explanation from her.

"Your father's grave," she said softly, and his eyes shot up to meet hers. "Some of the weapons there had the same engraving on them. And this dagger…it came from a store room full of its like in the Taira residence."

Inuyasha was silent, looking blankly from her to the dagger. At length he curled his fist around the sheath, pressing until it crumpled and the blade inside snapped. Kagome's eyes widened as she watched him, his expression empty of any feeling as the remains of the dagger clattered to the ground.

"So it really was them."

Kagome's eyes roved his face, scanning it for any hint of what he might be feeling. There was nothing there for her to see, and she was afraid that meant that he felt it more deeply than he knew what to do with. She put out a tentative hand, touching his forearm lightly.

"I know this must be difficult for you, but we need to act cautiously," she said softly. "You simply cannot hope to oppose them openly right now, and there is already too much confusion within the court to add to it. Please trust, though, that I am doing everything in my power to ensure you get enough support to punish them as they deserve to be punished."

Inuyasha looked at the hand on his arm, some of his earlier anger seeming to leave him. He nodded wordlessly. Kagome almost smiled despite the solemnity of the moment, feeling for a brief moment as if things had returned to normal between them.

"…How'd you get a hold of that thing, anyway?" Inuyasha asked, a hint of suspicion creeping into his tone as the pieces caught his eye once more. Shippou had crept close enough to prod at them, reluctantly impressed at the strength the hanyou had displayed in crushing the blade single-handedly.

Kagome nearly groaned. There went their moment.

"I…" she hesitated, well aware that any mention of Kouga's name generally signaled the beginning of a fight between them.

"That wolf gave it to Kagome," Shippou piped up, picking up one of the pieces to try his own hand at crushing it. "He smells even worse than you."

Yes, it had most certainly been a mistake to bring him.

Dead silence filled the room, save the slight shuffling of Shippou's movements as he blithely continued his explorations of the room. Kagome's eyes were riveted to the floor. She could feel his anger escalating a notch every moment the silence continued.

"The wolf?" he ground out at last, and she flinched. "That bastard gave you this!"

"It's not as if I sought him out specifically," Kagome said quickly. "I needed someone who could get close enough to the Taira to watch them for us. Kouga-sama was the only-"

"And what'd he get from you in return?" Inuyasha cut her off, taking hold of one of her forearms to get her full attention. "Bastard's wanted you from the start. So what'd you give him, Kagome?"

Perhaps it was that he had hit a little too close to the truth this time in his assumptions about her dealings with Kouga. Perhaps it was the idea that the man with whom she was in love could be so oblivious to how she felt that he could accuse her of being involved with another. Perhaps it was the ever-present, ever-pressing knowledge that he was soon to be married to a woman who was not herself and she would be forced to stand by him without saying a word.

Whatever it was, something in Kagome snapped.

"What right have you to tell me who I can and cannot be with?" she snapped, snatching her arm away violently. "What business is it of yours, Inuyasha? You and I are not-… As your servant you have my loyalty, but I will not allow you to dictate my life to me! If Kouga-sama is my choice then what claim on me do you have to tell me otherwise? None! None at all! You and I-!"

She cut herself off, breathing hard. She could feel herself on the brink of tears and swallowed them back fiercely.

Abruptly she grabbed Shippou, snatching him up and making for the doorway before Inuyasha had time to react. She paused just on the threshold, unable to leave without one parting shot.

"I believe congratulations are in order. Fujiwara-sama told me all about your plans for the wedding. So congratulations, Inuyasha. I hope you'll be happy together."

And then she was gone.


	20. Of Confinements and Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our mini-history lesson for the day:
> 
> -chūgū: A term coined during the reign of Emperor Ichijō. Kōgō was generally the word for the Empress Consort and the palace in which she lived within the Dairi (the Fujiwara residence where Kikyou lives in this story), but Ichijō had two Empress Consorts and so chūgū was a term given to the second of them. The chūgū had a second residence built for her within the Dairi to live in.
> 
> -kikuji no ho and kikujin: Don't really feel like describing the kikuji no ho because it's elaborate and a bit strange looking, but if you google it you can get a good look. Basically it's the official dress of the Emperor, and kikujin is a greenish color that only the Emperor was allowed to wear within the court.
> 
> -nubakama: pants similar to the sashinuki Inuyasha generally wears in the series, but a bit more formal in nature.
> 
> -kanmuri: Once again, hard to describe, but google can provide you with a good image if you look it up. Basically a hat that courtiers wore, with one specially designed one that served as the equivalent of a crown for the Emperor.
> 
> And now without further ado, the story!

Despite the swiftness with which she fled the encounter, Kagome could not get away from the tangled mess of her own feelings. She could not bear the thought of the Fujiwara residence at the moment and, forgetting even the caution of a guard, made to escape the confines of the Dairi as swiftly as her feet would carry her.

It was only a stroke of good fortune that allowed her to roam the streets of the court in such a manner without happening upon trouble, but before she knew it she and Shippou were safely within the walls of the Shingonin residence.

It had not been a conscious decision on her part to come to that place in particular, but she was vaguely grateful that her feet had carried her there. There were few servants in residence there to see her, and Miroku was out when she arrived.

Still shaking slightly, she was led to a small tea room to sit and wait for the houshi's return. A younger servant girl quietly served her and the kitsune a mug of tea each, thankfully withholding any comment she might have had on her poorly concealed distress.

Though Shippou made several valiant and rather outlandish attempts at gaining her attention, Kagome could not force her mind to focus on any single thing for more than a matter of moments. Echoes of the disastrous meeting assailed her, anger and embarrassment chilling and warming her by turns at the remembrance.

She wanted to take it all back. She wanted to charge back into his chambers and yell some more. It was hard to decide which of the urges was stronger, but in the end she could only get up and pace agitatedly about the room. Shippou watched her bemusedly from the perch he had taken up atop the table, uncertain what to do and beginning to feel vaguely guilty for his part in all of it.

The rattling of the screen as it was rolled back on its old hinges at last managed to pull Kagome free of her muddled thoughts. Miroku entered the room, smiling as he tucked several sheets of parchment away into the front of his robes.

For a moment he faltered at the sight of her up and in mid-pace and Shippou beginning to mimic her flustered motions atop the table. Coughing a laugh discreetly into his hand, he quickly recovered a welcoming smile.

"Kagome-chan, to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?" he said, his good humor even more pronounced than usual. "I apologize for being out when you called. I had some business to attend to and I did not anticipate being allowed the privilege of your company today. Shippou-chan, as well."

"No, not at all," Kagome said hurriedly return. "I am at fault for failing to inform you before I came. I apologize. I merely…"

She trailed off awkwardly, mentally too exhausted to even attempt an excuse for her presence there. Her gaze fell to the floor between them.

"Your cheek seems to be healing well," he commented innocuously after a moment, sensing her unease.

She watched his feet as he came toward her, a gentle hand on her chin angling her face so that he could inspect the wound. Still she avoided his gaze, aware that he was examining more than just her injury.

"There's no swelling, and the wound is closing nicely," he said. "Still, a woman's skin should never be touched in the heat of any emotion save passion. I am deeply sorry I was not there for you when you needed me, Kagome-chan."

"Nonsense," Kagome returned sharply, unable to keep her gaze from him any longer. "You warned me yourself not to leave the residence. It's no one's fault save my own that I chose to not to heed you."

Miroku did not reply, merely looking into her face for a long moment. Kagome flushed, certain that he could read more there than she wished him to.

"You look distinctly unhappy, Kagome-chan," he commented gently, confirming her suspicions. She sighed.

"And you looked distinctly happy when you arrived," she returned. "I am sorry for ruining it. Perhaps I should go-"

"Uh uh uh," Miroku said, shaking his head. "You will not escape me so easily as that, Kagome-chan. Besides which, any man whose mood could be ruined by the presence of beautiful woman is no man at all. Come, allow me the pleasure of your presence a bit longer."

Involuntarily Kagome smiled, reminded for a moment of her first meeting with the houshi. Back when everything had seemed so simple…

The smile dimmed. Nothing felt quite so simple anymore.

A hand pressed lightly but insistently against the small of her back, propelling her out of the room. She glanced at Miroku and he offered her a benign smile, removing the hand and instead gesturing for her to go ahead.

"It's a bit cold, but the snow is beautiful over the garden," he said. "And I believe there is a kemari ball out there for you, Shippou-chan."

The three retired to the garden, Kagome and Miroku taking a seat on walkway that overlooked the frost-covered space while Shippou eagerly sought out the promised ball. He wasted no time in demanding their attention as he began a series of elaborate maneuvers to keep the ball aloft, eager to cheer Kagome and atone for his earlier role in her argument with the hanyou. Each bounce of the ball saw it assuming a new shape as it sailed aloft, from a crying mushroom to small statue of Jizō.

"My ears are yours should you have need of them," Miroku offered, glancing away from the kitsune's spectacle for a moment. "As well any other part of my body you might draw comfort from."

Kagome's cheeks pinked at the thinly veiled suggestion and she shot him a reproving look. He grinned unrepentantly in return.

"Must you talk like that when you do not mean a word of it?" Kagome huffed. "Only think, if ever you are in earnest about your feelings for a woman, she would never know it."

Kagome was well aware that she likely had no business poking around on her friend's behalf as to Miroku's feelings, but she could hardly keep herself from it. Besides which it was nice to focus her mind on anything save her own troubles.

Miroku's expression faltered for a moment, but he recovered quickly. He leaned in towards her, laying one of his hands over her own where it rested on the walkway and pressing his free hand to his chest in an exaggerated show of injury.

"It wounds me, Kagome-chan, that you can even suggest that my feelings for you are anything other than sincere," he opined theatrically. "My…ah, general appreciation for the beauty manifested in the female form in no way undermines my deep and abiding affection for you."

"And for any other woman on whom you lay eyes," Kagome returned drily, raising a brow at him. "Tell me truly, Miroku-sama, have you never felt that there was any woman who merited all of your attention? Just one woman who you thought was special above all others?"

"Must I continue to assure you of my affections, Kagome-chan?" Miroku attempted lightly. "Because I would be more than happy to prove to you physically how ardently my…"

He trailed off under the force of her unrelenting gaze. With a sigh he removed his hand from hers, turning to watch Shippou's antics out in the snowy garden.

"Little did I realize this talk of ours would be turned upon me," he quipped, a last ditch attempt at diverting her.

Kagome did not so much as blink.

"There was such a woman once," Miroku confessed at last, bowing beneath her determined stare. "But I gave her up long ago. The cause was a lost one, and why should I limit my boundless affections to the pursuit of a woman who could never reciprocate them? Besides, emotions are things of transient beauty. By nature they are fleeting. Thus the fleeting nature of my…ah, romantic encounters with women is tailored quite sensibly to match-"

"Why did you think it a lost cause?" Kagome interrupted, to keep him from steering the conversation back onto the usual course it seemed to take with him.

He shot her a glance from the corner of his eye, obviously perturbed at her ability to snatch the figurative reins from him. He shifted where he sat, shrugging his shoulders in a gesture that was strangely ineloquent for him.

"From birth there were certain circumstances that dictated that she and I were not to be," he replied vaguely. "I…I would not have done her harm for all the world, but that is what any union between the two of us would have been. Harmful to her."

Solemnity entered his expression now, his eyes growing distant with the turn of his thoughts. Kagome watched him, her chest aching with sympathy.

She felt more certain than ever that it was Sango with whom he had been in love. Sango whom he was still very much in love with. Why else would it still affect him so to speak of it? Obviously it was the disadvantage of his own birth that made him feel unequal to her and made him worry that she would be degraded by the match.

This time it was her who reached out to touch his hand.

"I understand, Miroku-sama," she said with feeling.

He blinked, drawn from his thoughts as he turned to look at her.

"We're terribly similar," she confessed softly.

Miroku's brows drew downward questioningly, but realization seemed to dawn after a moment.

"You mean to say that you…"

"There is a…a man," Kagome supplied, her gaze dropping. "He is…of the court. Really, it was very foolish of me to…"

She trailed off. She could feel Miroku looking at her for a long moment, taking this in, and she wondered if she should have told him. At last the hand beneath hers shifted, turning over to grasp her hand in turn. She glanced up at him.

"It seems you have been keeping more secrets than just the identity of our Tennō-sama," he said with solemn sympathy.

"I never thought myself a secretive person, but it seems I have collected more than my share since coming here," Kagome replied softly. "Are you angry with me?"

"No," Miroku answered, shaking his head. "I understand the necessity of certain secrets too well to condemn you for yours, Kagome-chan. With the Tennō-sama concealment was obviously necessary. As to this new object of your affections…I will confess that I wish you had confided in me sooner. Not only that I might have prepared my own heart for the disappointment of learning that you are forever beyond my reach, but also…"

He paused, turning to meet her eyes. The seriousness there took her aback for a moment.

"I often feel that I did you a great disservice in bringing you here," he said quietly, his eyes lowering to their entwined hands. "I knew that it would be hard for you, understood what life in the court as an outsider was, but I brought you nonetheless. And I know that you have suffered for my decision, though you are too good to say it yourself. I feel responsible for your happiness and your unhappiness, and I worry-"

"I do wish," Kagome interrupted him gently, squeezing his hand. "That everyone would stop trying to take responsibility for me. While it is very kind of all of you, I can promise you that it is entirely unnecessary. No one is responsible for me, my happiness or unhappiness or what have you, save myself."

"You did not force me to come to the court with you, Miroku-sama. I made a decision as much as you did, and for all that has happened I still would not have made a different one. You gave me a chance that otherwise I would never have gotten, and now you must allow me to do what I can with it. But please, never suffer the thought that you have done wrong by me."

Miroku looked at her for a long moment before his expression dissolved into a small smile. He picked up her hand, tugging at it until he had pulled her into the crook of his arm. He slung his arm across her shoulders quite chastely, holding her tucked affectionately against his side. Kagome smiled to herself, the brotherly warmth of the gesture momentarily sweeping other concerns from her mind.

"You are a good woman, Kagome," she heard him murmur. "And if this unworthy man lucky enough to gain your affections cannot see it, he is an incurable fool."

Kagome's smile dimmed a fraction.

"I am afraid that I am the only one fit to be called a fool," she sighed. "I have certainly acted the part in every instance in which he was concerned recently. Even just this morning I railed at him like a mad woman. And even knowing how awfully I acted, I still feel so angry at him. He's to be married soon, and though I know he's not responsible for my feelings…"

She sighed, her mood rapidly deteriorating as the morning's argument was brought once more to the forefront of her mind. Miroku, sensing the decline, squeezed her shoulder comfortingly.

"You were hurt, Kagome-chan," he said gently. "There's not much help for it. Love makes fools of us all in time. Believe it or not, I, too, have been subject to folly from time to time. No, no, do not protest, though I know I am your idea of perfection and wisdom embodied."

Kagome smothered a chuckle behind her hand, his histrionics overcoming her once more. Out of the corner of her eye she could see a barely suppressed smile on his face, threatening the mock-solemnity he affected. She looped one of her own arms around him.

"You have found me out, Miroku-sama," she replied in kind. "You have been my ideal since the first moment I laid eyes upon you. Shall we marry and be done with all this other nonsense?"

Miroku's expression cracked and he chuckled as well.

"Were that love was so simple a thing," he said. "We would at this very moment be within the confines of my chambers, consummating-"

"Miroku-sama!" Kagome cut in indignantly, her face heating.

"Forgive me, Kagome-chan," Miroku said, unrepentant and obviously pleased at having been able to take the joke farthest. "But when the thought of marriage to a woman as beautiful as yourself is put forth, I defy any man to keep his mind from matters of a more…physical nature."

"And those matters are better left in the mind alone," Kagome huffed, slightly miffed that he had managed to get the better of her yet again.

"Yes, yes," he said, patting her shoulder in a placating manner. "I apologize for offending your sensibilities. From now on I promise that all such thoughts of you will only be enjoyed within the confines of my own mind."

Kagome shot him a reproving look, but his attention had shifted back out to the kitsune in the garden. Shippou seemed to be attempting to ride the ball, now transformed into an over-large spinning top, around the yard. Obviously he had grown bored of kemari. He seemed to be getting quite dizzy, as well.

They both watched, smiling, as the child went whirling about the snowy garden. At length Kagome turned towards the houshi, a thought occurring to her.

"You said you gave the woman up," Kagome ventured quietly. "But did you really? Were you ever really able to stop…stop loving her?"

The question was a double edged sword, she knew. On the one hand she wanted so much for the answer to be no. That he had never gotten over his feelings for Sango. That there was still some hope, however remote or far-fetched, that the two of them might find the happiness they both so rightly deserved with one another.

But if the answer was no, he had never gotten over it, he was entangled in it still, then it hardly boded well for her own plight.

Still, she needed to ask.

Miroku did not turn to look at her. He continued to follow Shippou's antics with his eyes, but the joy had gone out of them.

"I have been with other women since the time when I first learned I loved her," he answered slowly, reluctantly. "And for moments at a time I have even been able to believe that I loved some of those women."

"Until I realized one day that standard to which I held all of these other women…was her. That she had become the ideal against which all others seemed to pale in comparison. That was a rather dismaying moment. Still, I do make an effort. What else can I do?"

Kagome's heart sank. There was a certain pained resignation in the set of his mouth that answered the question even more clearly than his words.

He loved Sango.

She leaned into his side, offering what little comfort she could. He squeezed her shoulder in acknowledgment.

"I want you to be happy," she said softly. "Please believe that you will be happy some day, as happy as you deserve to be. I believe it."

He did not answer her, but held her more closely.

* * *

  
Any conversation that might have followed was cut short by the entry of a servant. She informed Kagome that there were guards from the Dairi requesting that she come out. Apparently they had received orders that they were to return her to the Dairi immediately.

Kagome's stomach clenched at the thought of what this might mean. Likely her punishment for speaking so rashly was coming much more swiftly than she had expected. Miroku shot her a concerned look, as well, but she quickly assured him that it was nothing. It would not do to have him worried when there was little to be done either way.

She did ask, however, if he could keep Shippou with him until she could return to collect him. The child certainly did not need to be present for whatever down dressing Inuyasha would undoubtedly subject her to, and she had not forgotten the unwittingly antagonistic role he had played in their last encounter. Better safe than sorry, after all.

Miroku agreed readily enough. He also asked whether or not she thought she might be able to return to visit him the following day, his former good humor resurfacing for a moment as he informed her that he would have something that he wished to show her then. Kagome promised that she would and said her farewells to both.

The guards formed a tight ring around her as soon as she emerged from the Shingonin residence, as if they thought she might try to escape them. While the idea did appeal to Kagome, she knew it would be both foolish and pointless to attempt it. Wordlessly she allowed them to lead her back into the confines of the Dairi, only half listening to the head guard's apologies for having forced her to cut short her visit. They had received orders from the Tennō and so on and so forth…

She was preoccupied instead with wondering exactly how angry Inuyasha would be with her and exactly how long she would be able to keep hold of her own emotions when faced with him again so soon. Despite her cathartic conversation with Miroku, she still felt raw and on edge at the thought of the hanyou. She only hoped she could bite her tongue long enough to get through this.

Kagome was so caught up in her thoughts that she did not notice that they had arrived until one of the guards tapped her sheepishly on the shoulder. She blinked, shooting the guard an apologetic look, and stepped forward as the head guard gestured for her to enter first.

She halted mid-step. She realized suddenly that this was not the entryway to Inuyasha's chambers. It was not a building that she recognized at all, for that matter.

"Ah, excuse me, but where are we exactly?" she said, turning back to the guards in confusion.

The head guard frowned at her.

"As I explained earlier, Miko-sama," he said slowly. "Our orders were to bring you here, to the residence of the former Chūgū. There is no need to worry. The residence has been empty for quite some time."

"The Tennō-sama wishes for you to…remain here for a time. We will be at your service, Miko-sama, and your things will soon be brought to make you more comfortable here."

Kagome blinked, looking slowly from one guard to another. They all averted their eyes, looking slightly embarrassed. Obviously she had missed quite a bit in her inattention on the way here.

"Are you saying…am I to be confined here?" Kagome asked softly, scarcely able to believe the words as they left her.

The heard guard cleared his throat uncomfortably, his gaze dancing away from hers.

"Confinement is a rather harsh word, Miko-sama," he hedged. "The Tennō-sama would merely like to relocate you here for the sake of your safety. The mood of the court is hardly stable at the moment, and you are safest within the walls of the Dairi."

"Am I allowed to come and go as I please, then?"

"…No," the head guard reluctantly replied after a moment of hesitation. "The Tennō-sama has given us word that you are not to go outside unless you are accompanied by His Majesty. However, you are allowed to receive approved visitors and to exchange correspondence outside of the Dairi."

The latter was offered up hurriedly in the hopes of assuaging any explosion of anger that might be forthcoming, but Kagome was blank faced. She merely stared at him for a long moment before shaking her head.

"No," she said. "This cannot be right. I need to speak to the Tennō-sama. This cannot be right."

She took a step forward, intending to go to Inuyasha's chambers immediately, but the guards quickly stepped forward into her path.

"I apologize, Miko-sama, but we have our orders from the Tennō-sama's own hand. Until we receive word from His Majesty you are not to move from here. Please, if you will simply cooperate, Miko-sama, there will be no need for any embarrassment on any of our parts."

Kagome heard the threat veiled by the polite words. They would use force to keep her there if it she made it necessary. She stared at them wordlessly, brows furrowed in disbelief. Not a one of them budged at all.

With a barely muffled scream of frustration Kagome spun around and marched in past the gates of the residence. There were a number of servants milling about there, working to prepare the residence for an inhabitant after it had sat empty for so long, but they all paused to bow to her as she entered. Kagome could not even manage a smile in return, settling for merely giving a quick nod of acknowledgment.

She nearly fled into the first empty room she found in the residence, frightened at the force of her own anger as it built inside her. She dropped down to sit inelegantly on the bare, dusty wooden floor of the room, merely sitting and taking deep, shaky breaths for several long moments as she attempted to wrap her mind around what was happening.

Inuyasha had sentenced her to confinement.

There were a number of reactions that she had anticipated from him, but this was certainly not one of them.

But was it really him? Could he really have done this to her? Perhaps someone else had sent the orders to the guards masquerading as Inuyasha.

No. Who else would choose to confine her within the Dairi? If someone wanted to harm her, this was the last place to do it, and she knew well enough that the guards with her were loyal to Inuyasha. They would take orders from no one else and if they wanted to harm her they would have done it before now.

It could only be Inuyasha.

But how could he do this to her? Why would he take such drastic action to punish her for a silly bout of anger?

Kouga. Little that she knew of made the hanyou angrier than even just the mention of the wolf Lord. And Kagome had all but declared to him that she had chosen to be with Kouga.

Then it was not a punishment. It was a way to keep her from seeing Kouga.

This time Kagome did scream, bringing both of her fists down against the cold wood of the floor.

How dare he? How _dare_ he? After all that she had done for him, he had the nerve to subject her to this sort of humiliation? And all because he didn't like Kouga!

Worst of all, she could not even yell at him for all of this until he chose to come and see her! Certainly she might write a furious note and send it to him, but there was no way that would even begin to satisfy the absolute rage roiling in the pit of her stomach…

"Miko-sama?"

A timid voice called softly from behind the shoji, startling her. For a moment all of her anger swung towards the slight outline of the figure there, but a moment's reflection showed her the irrationality of that. She closed her eyes, forcing herself to take a deep breath before she answered.

"Come in, please."

There was a moment of hesitation before the serving woman slid the door open, and Kagome regained enough presence of mind to wonder if she had heard the racket she had been making. The woman bowed once before entering and sliding the screen closed behind her. The serving woman turned towards her and bowed once more, her forehead nearly touching the floor.

Several long moments passed in silence.

"I…I do not mean to impose, Miko-sama," the woman ventured at last, her eyes lowered demurely. "But I…I happened to be passing by, you see, and I could not help but overhear…"

She trailed off, shooting the miko a quick glance. A hot flush crawled over Kagome’s face as she realized that she had indeed been heard. She was silent, slightly mortified.

"Is there something the matter?" the serving woman resumed hurriedly at last. "I know well that it is none of my business, and if you do not wish to answer, Miko-sama, I understand entirely. But the servants of the court…we are all for you, you see, we all support you and…well, it struck me as strange, you know, that the Tennō-sama would inform all the servants so suddenly that he was moving you here, Miko-sama, and without even having moved many things here to see to your comfort first, and then to place a guard around the entire residence…well, I mean, it struck us all as strange…"

She paused once more, peeking up from beneath her lashes as if to gauge whether or not she had offended.

"What I am trying to say in my own rambling way is that…well, the servants are on your side, Miko-sama," she said, meeting Kagome's eyes momentarily. "Whatever the…ah, circumstances might be, you can count on us to stand with you if you need us."

Kagome blinked mutely at the woman for a moment, uncertain what to make of this. Abruptly it clicked into place. Her eyes widened.

"Oh, no!" she exclaimed, her hands flying up in a warding gesture. "No, no. There are no…no circumstances. The Tennō-sama merely had me moved here because…well, for convenience's sake. It is easier for me to confer with his Majesty if I do not have to run all over the court to do so, you see, and Fujiwara-sama and I felt it best that I have my own space separate from hers now that I am an official court spiritualist."

She consoled herself with the fact that it was not entirely a lie. Certainly this unexpected move had been for the convenience of someone, if not herself. But now was not the time to let her anger and frustration get the best of her. She could not afford even the appearance of division or conflict with Inuyasha, not right now.

Still the serving woman appeared unconvinced.

"Then, what I heard just now…?"

"Was something else entirely," Kagome supplied. "As you might imagine, I have had a good number of things to frustrate me in the last several days, but I can assure you that my move here is not one of them."

"Of course," the woman breathed, tapping the side of her head in a gesture of abashment. "Of course. I merely assumed…But of course you've had a number of things to contend with, Miko-sama. We all know how hard you've been working. I'm sorry to have been so nosy, really…"

"Not at all," Kagome replied. "I appreciate your concern for me, truly. And I appreciate your obvious loyalty, as well. But I need you to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my side is the Tennō-sama's side. His Majesty…His Majesty is a very good man, and I stand with His Majesty in all matters. You understand, don't you?"

"Of course, Miko-sama," the woman replied readily. "And the servants stand behind both of you, for whatever it's worth."

"It is worth a great deal," Kagome replied, smiling at her.

The woman peered up at her, smiling tentatively in return.

"You are one of the few able to see it as such," she said softly. "Now if you will excuse me, Miko-sama, I am supposed to be helping to unpack the things and clean this old place up a little bit. I had best stop shirking my duties."

She bowed again once more before moving to leave.

"Just a moment," Kagome called after her as she slid the shoji open.

"Yes, Miko-sama?"

"Your name," Kagome said. "May I ask it?"

"Chūsei, Miko-sama," the woman replied, beaming now. "You may call me Chūsei."

Kagome smiled.

* * *

It took a great deal of effort and several hours of meditation out in the large gardens behind the residence-nearly falling ill in the process because of the deep chill in the air and earning herself a scolding from Chūsei for it- but at length Kagome was able to at least get a rein on her anger over having been forced into isolation.

She could not say how long she might be able to keep hold of those reins if confronted with the hanyou himself, but for the time being she could at least maintain the appearance of a united front with him.

Her frustration over the extreme limitations of the situation was an issue not as easily overcome. Certainly she had been limited before due to the tenuous nature of court sentiment at the moment and the necessity of having a guard with her whenever she went out, but at least she had still been relatively free to go about as she wished.

The guards here made certain that that was no longer an option. They encircled the entire perimeter of the residence. Even still she was tempted to at least try and see if she might be able to get past them, if only to get out from behind the walls for a bit. Ultimately she rejected the idea, deciding that her 'united front' fib would likely fall apart if she were to alert the servants of the residence to the fact that the guards were in place as much to keep her in as to keep others out.

Within the span of the first day of her confinement the servants, whirling about the premises in a flurry of activity, had managed to clean out and furnish every room with things of hers sent over from the future Empress's residence as well as things she had never seen before but that Kagome was informed had been supplied by the Tennō himself.

There were lavish robes, rugs, silk folding screens, a few small trunks of rather extravagant jewelry, perfumes, a few game sets, and an abundance of paper and writing materials. An elaborate bathing chamber was even set up for her, filled with oils and soaps of all sizes and colors.

All of the opulence and show really only served to fuel Kagome's latent anger. She thought it foolish in the extreme to go to so much trouble to equip the whole residence when it was only her staying there and when she had no intention of remaining for very long if she could help it at all.

Besides which she could see clearly in the sheer bulk of the items Inuyasha's inelegant attempt at appeasing her. It only served to irritate her further that Inuyasha seemed to think her foolish enough to be distracted by a few shiny trinkets.

The result of all of this was that Kagome was left with little to do but think and wait. She sent off a note to Miroku and Shippou apologizing for being unable to come and visit them for a time and offering the excuse that the Tennō had asked her to remain close for the next several days for reasons she had been asked not to disclose. She did not dare invite either of them or Sango to come visit her. She knew that if they were to come and see the guards flanking the residence she would not be able to conceal her captivity for long. Better to keep them at arm's length and correspond through notes for the time being.

She attempted to send a note to Kouga, as well, but the servant carrying her message returned at the end of the day to inform her that she had been unable to find any trace of the wolf Lord. The residence he had been occupying had been cleared out and no one seemed to have any idea where he might have gone. Kagome thanked the man for his efforts, though inwardly she was troubled.

Kouga had promised he would leave immediately to start rallying the youkai clans outside the court, but he had also said he would come to see her before he set off. Knowing him as she did, Kagome found it hard to believe that he would simply leave without coming to see her first.

She wondered if Inuyasha had had a hand in his sudden disappearance. She wanted to believe that he was not brash enough to lash out at the wolf Lord and risk engendering the wrath of his clan merely because of what she had said, but it was hard for her to feel certain of anything after the stunt he had pulled by having her placed in isolation simply to keep the two of them apart. The best she could do was to pray that the wolf Lord had made it out of the court unmolested.

The ample time she now had for reflection did not supply Kagome only with worries, though. At her request Chūsei often came to keep her company. The woman was some twenty years her senior and had a motherly, unassuming air that Kagome found deeply comforting. She was also genuinely concerned with her welfare in a way that soothed the village girl's frayed temper.

In the course of one of their conversations out on the back walkway that overlooked the frosted gardens, each of them clutching a mug of steaming tea to keep warm as they watched the occasional small flurry of flakes drift lazily down from the darkening sky, Kagome gave voice at last to a thought that had been growing in the back of her mind since their first meeting.

"Chūsei?" she began tentatively.

"Hmmm?" the serving woman responded absently, her eyes busy tracing the path a of a single errant snowflake as it whirled in dizzying circles to land at last near them on the walkway.

It had taken some time, but she had at length been convinced to speak informally when it was just the two of them together. The casual response made Kagome grin.

"I have a request to make of you, if you'll hear it," Kagome said.

Chūsei blinked, emerging from her half-daze and turning towards Kagome with a quizzical frown.

"I'm surprised. You hardly ever ask me for anything," Chūsei said. "Of course I'll hear it, Kagome-sama. You've long known I'm yours to command."

"I'm well aware," Kagome said. "However, this request is…a bit extravagant, if you will. I just want you to know beforehand that I understand entirely if you choose to refuse."

Chūsei merely cocked a brow, waiting for her to continue.

"From what I've seen in my time here in the court, servants go largely unnoticed by the nobles, despite the obvious fact that all of their lives are essentially built upon your efforts," Kagome said.

"A job done well is its own reward. It's the courtiers who need the praise and recognition, not us servants," demurred Chūsei, though she looked pleased by the acknowledgement.

"Precisely," Kagome replied. "Servants are present everywhere in the court, in every residence, though they're largely a quiet presence. And that brought me to thinking, well…I need your help, Chūsei. Your help and the help of any other servants you can find who are willing."

"You know well enough that these are uncertain times for the Tennō-sama. And with the eyes of the servants helping his Majesty and I, it is my thought that a great deal of trouble might be avoided. I need…I need information, I suppose, and I can't get it all by myself. I'm simply not able. But with your help…"

Kagome trailed off, watching the woman with hopeful eyes.

"You mean that you would like the servants to act as your eyes and ears around the court?" Chūsei supplied after a beat of silence.

Kagome nodded.

"I don't mean to have you invade their privacy for me," she clarified. "I don't want familial secrets or anything like that. I just need to know if there are any who plan to oppose the Tennō-sama or harm his Majesty. But I cannot be everywhere at once, and many of the clans are wary of me now that they know who I am and where I stand."

"I understand, though, that there is a good deal of risk involved for the servants should they ever be caught. I can promise to take full responsibility should that happen, and I'm certain his Majesty would offer as much protection as possible, as well. But I need you specifically, Chūsei, to organize the others. To keep track of them, listen to whatever they have to report, and bring it back to me or the Tennō-sama. If you are willing, that is."

Chūsei merely looked at her for a long moment, her expression neutral. Then the corners of her mouth curled upward, warmth lighting her pale brown eyes as she reached out to place a chilled hand over one of Kagome's own.

"As if it were a question," she chuckled. "I'd be honored to be of help to you, Kagome-sama. And while I can't make promises for anyone else, I know there are a great many servants who would be eager for the chance, as well. After all, who else beside you and the Tennō-sama will stand for us? Will praise us and think us valuable?"

"More people than you might think," Kagome said softly. "The courtiers…with time I think they can be brought to see things differently. Many of them are simply so certain that the old ways must be the right ways that they don't stop to consider them. We only need to make them think."

"Then you make them think, and we will watch them," Chūsei said, patting her hand. "If anyone can do it, it will be you. Tomorrow I will begin inquiring among some of the servants I'm certain I can trust."

"Thank you," Kagome said, squeezing the hand that covered hers appreciatively.

And thus, with one request, she gained hundreds of thousands of eyes and ears.

* * *

  
An entire week passed for Kagome in isolation. By the end of she felt she might be on the verge losing her wits, despite copious amounts of meditation and the occasional company and reports of Chūsei on her progress in recruiting servants.Even so, the form that her reprieve came in almost made her wish she could have just remained within the residence.

The servants woke her early on the seventh morning, guiding her half-asleep back to the elaborate bathing chamber that she had yet to make use of. Heated water and the scent of bathing oils already filled the large wooden basin, and the servants made quick work of stripping her down and urging her into the tub.

They scrubbed vigorously enough to wake her fully, cleaning the grime from her skin and hair. They oiled her hair, too, and applied some sort of lotion to her skin after they had dried her off. While Kagome generally found the process of being washed and groomed by servants objectionable at best and a genuine pain at worst, what followed was worse by far.

Chūsei arrived towards the end of her bath, informing her that she had clothes laid out in her room. Kagome donned a robe and followed her there where, to her horror, she found a juni-hito composed of no less than nine layers laid out for her.

She shot Chūsei a pleading look, but the woman merely shook her head.

"I'm sorry, Kagome-sama, but I have my orders," she said. "It's to be a juni-hito today or nothing. Now, come, you're sure to look beautiful."

Kagome frowned.

"Whose orders?" she persisted stubbornly.

"The Tennō-sama's direct orders," Chūsei replied, bending to take up the innermost layer.

Kagome felt her hands curl into fists, anger sparking in her abruptly. What abuses did he hope to heap on her now by forcing this on her?

"Did his Majesty give a reason for the necessity of all of today's…finery?" she managed to get out without sounding too rankled.

"None," Chūsei replied succinctly. "And you had best quit stalling. I'm getting this on you one way or another."

With a sigh Kagome submitted, knowing well enough that with Chūsei's unbending will it was more than an idle threat.

Chūsei made quick work of dressing her and making certain that the layers fell correctly. She combed out Kagome's hair-it had grown down just past her waist now, Kagome noted idly-and fussed with it a bit before deciding to leave it lying unadorned down her back. She hesitated when it came to the face power, taking her chin in one hand and examining her features contemplatively.

"Well, you're pale enough to do without, I think," she mused aloud. "But that bruising is still a bit dark. We'd best cover that up, at least."

As Kikyou had predicted, the cut was healing up nicely and did not seem as if it was likely to scar. The inside of her mouth had long since healed completely and the bruising on her cheek had recently faded to a mottled yellow blotchiness that, while still unpleasant to look at, was at least not painful when prodded.

Chūsei set to work covering the remnants of the wound, adding a bit of pale pink powder to her lids to complement the pale blue of the robes before declaring her as beautiful as an Empress.

Kagome was given a pair of geta and a light parasol and instructed to go to the front gate of the residence. She made her wobbling way out, cursing inwardly with every clumping step the asinine ideas about beauty held in the court. The guards allowed her out with cordial nods, as if they had not been keeping her locked up for a week. Obviously they had received their orders, as well.

A figure awaited her just outside of the gates, back turned towards her, and for a moment she was taken aback. There was no mistaking who it was, the distinctive coloring of his hair alone made him instantly recognizable, but the outward transformation was so great that she was thrown.

Gone was the casual bright red of his simple karaginu and sashinuki, replaced by a long and elegantly embroidered kikuji no ho of the imperial kikujin coloring. Billowing nubakama of a dark blue peeked out from beneath the low hem of the kikuji no ho. He had even gone to the length of having the mass of his silver tucked up beneath the black lacquer of the kanmuri, his ears obviously pinioned beneath it as well.

Kagome was too shocked to do more than stare as Inuyasha turned around, looking as miserable as she felt swaddled in all of her finery. His eyes met hers and his expression shifted, catching somewhere between wary guilt and stubborn defensiveness.

"H-hey," he said tentatively after a beat of silence.

Kagome felt every muscle in her body tense instantaneously, anger rushing hotly into her face. He must have seen it there clearly enough, if the slight step he took back was any indication.

"We need to go get Kikyou," he said hurriedly, turning on his heel and starting off without waiting for her.

"Don't you dare run away, you coward!" Kagome hissed, softly enough that the guards at the gate could not hear her. "You know what you did was wrong! How dare you-!"

She scrambled clumsily after him, holding up the hem of her robes in the exact manner she had been taught not to and wobbling horribly atop her shoes. After a few moments he seemed to take pity on her, slowing his pace enough for her to come up just behind him.

"You turn and face me right now, Inuyasha!" she snapped, reaching out to tug at one of his trailing sleeves. "What you did to me is unforgivable, unbelievable, and I deserve an apology! At least an explanation! You can't just-"

"I can and I did," Inuyasha replied lowly, without halting or even sparing her a glance. "And I ain't gonna apologize, Kagome. I did the right thing."

"T-the right thing?" Kagome choked out, only just barely managing to keep from digging her nails as deeply into his arm as she could manage. "In what world is forcing me into confinement against my will the right thing?"

"You're mine, Kagome," Inuyasha said, and Kagome felt her heart jolt sharply inside her chest at the blunt sincerity of the words. "My servant. In case you forgot, you promised you'd stick with me. That flea-bitten bastard was distracting you. So I took away the distraction, simple as that."

Kagome faltered, the not entirely unpleasant shock of his words stealing her voice for a moment. She tried to remind herself that he had disrespected her with what he had done, had forced his will upon her when he had no right to. Still it was hard to recover all of her former wrath.

"What did you do to Kouga-sama?" she asked at last.

He did not reply, but shot her a glance out of the corner of his eye that said clearly enough that something had been done and it was not good. A chill ran through Kagome deeper than that in the air, and she was on the verge of demanding an explanation when the outer wall of the Fujiwara residence came into view.

Kikyou awaited them just outside of the front gate, her face hidden in the shade created by her parasol. She stepped lightly toward them through the thin layer of snow that still covered the grounds. Admiration and resentment vied for position inside Kagome at the grace of her movements even within the confines of the juni-hito.

"My Lord. Miko-sama," she greeted them both, and Kagome was silently surprised at the shift in address. "You look well."

The shade made her expression entirely inscrutable, and her tone was equally so. Still Kagome noticed suddenly the hand that still clutched the fabric of Inuyasha's sleeve. She released it as if it had burned her.

"As do you, Fujiwara-sama," Kagome replied politely, bowing.

"I trust you have found your new home in the former Chūgū-sama's residence to be satisfactory," the future Empress commented lightly.

Inuyasha shifted slightly beside her. Kagome, too, could sense a pointedness hidden behind the question that she did not understand. She hesitated, uncertain if she should tell the truth of it.

"It is a very beautiful place," she settled on at last. "Certainly more than I deserve. His Majesty is too generous by far."

She could not help shooting Inuyasha a glance at the last, though she did not push any further. Though she and Kikyou were slowly on the path toward an understanding, the idea of allowing the other woman into any dealings between her and Inuyasha bothered her. If the hanyou had not told his future wife exactly what he was doing, then Kagome would not be the one to do it either.

"I am glad to hear it," Kikyou said, though again her tone was so bland that it was difficult to tell if she truly was. "Shall we go then, my Lord?"

Inuyasha offered up his arm to her and Kikyou delicately placed her free arm within his. Kagome felt a slight twinge at the sight and averted her eyes, deciding then and there that whatever had occasioned her release from the residence that now served as her own personal prison was not something that she was going to enjoy.

With a small contingent of guards-ones recognizable as belonging to the Tachibana clan, Kagome noted with a fleeting twinge of pleasure-trailing a after them, the three made their way out of the Dairi. Kagome wanted very much to ask what they were to be doing, but stubbornness sealed her lips. Inuyasha and Kikyou both seemed to know perfectly well what was going on and Kagome refused to expose her own ignorance.

It seemed at first that they were merely taking a stroll. A light snow began to fall from the hazy gray of the morning sky and Kagome opened her own parasol to keep the flakes from landing on her robes. Other courtiers milled about the avenues all around them, more than Kagome could ever recall seeing outside at one time. She wondered if perhaps they had known about this stroll beforehand.

They watched from beneath parasols and behind fans with wary eyes, some even peeking out from just inside the gates of residences. Inuyasha and Kikyou continued to walk as if they were unaware and in no hurry, their heads held high and their faces composed. Kagome did her best to project the same image despite her general discomfort.

At length, after they had taken a few turns down several different streets, a woman approached them tentatively. She bowed lowly.

"I had heard that we might approach you, Tennō-sama, if we had any concerns," she said, though it sounded more like a question than a statement.

Inuyasha inclined his head slightly, assenting to this.

"I have a question then, Tennō-sama," she said, gaining a bit of confidence. "In…In eschewing the screen, your Majesty, have you not thrown out entirely the authority of the Tennō-sama? Years of tradition and your privileged position as conduit to the kami on earth?"

She turned her eyes up to his face, earnest with questioning. Kagome's gaze slid to Inuyasha to gauge his reaction. She half-expected him to snap at the woman, but his face retained the regal passivity he had managed to hold on to thus far throughout the outing. Kagome wondered if he was perhaps spending too much time with Kikyou.

"I have to believe that the authority of the Tennō is not dependent upon something as trivial as a screen," Inuyasha answered at last, and Kagome's eyes went wide. "And it is my wish to rule on the merits of my own ability, not the weight of the past or any supposed link I have with the kami. I will live or die by my own sword."

The reply was eloquent beyond anything Kagome might have anticipated, and she could not help the proud grin that stretched across her features. Still, a quick glance at the woman revealed some doubt lingering there. She turned to her, meeting her eyes.

"A great lesson I was taught in my training when I was young," Kagome said. "Was that the kami have no desire for us to merely wait complacently for the destiny which they desire for us to have. They have set an example of the path to walk, but we must walk it on our own with our own strength. It is not that his Majesty wishes to put the kami away from himself, but that his Majesty wishes to follow his own path using his own strength."

The woman blinked, nodding slowly as she took this in. A tentative smile spread across her face and she nodded once more.

"Yes, I see," she said. "Thank you. That has been troubling me, but I think I understand now. Thank you, Tennō-sama, Miko-sama."

"And we thank you for sharing your concern, cousin," Kikyou replied gracefully. "His Majesty is ever open to hearing from his people."

The woman nodded, bowed, thanked them all once more, and hurried off.

The walk resumed. Several more people approached in the course of it, all of them with various questions, requests, and concerns. Inuyasha met them all levelly, despite the vaguely inflammatory nature of a few of the comments, and Kikyou and Kagome filled in where he stumbled. By the third encounter or so it became clear to Kagome that Inuyasha must have made it known to the court that he would be out and that he wished to address their concerns.

She also understood the purpose of it. He was making his presence known and felt while at the same time giving the courtiers access to the Tennō in a way that had never been available to most of them before. He was establishing a connection with them, making himself real in their eyes by being present among them. Kagome marveled silently at the cleverness of the move and the amount of preparation he must have put into it.

Even so, the ones who did approach him were people belonging to clans that Kagome imagined were already sympathetic to his cause. The ones who were not merely observed from a distance, sizing him up. Still, it was something, and Kagome was rather proud of Inuyasha.

Less proud, perhaps, when at the end of it she was returned to the former Chūgū's residence and realized she was still not allowed to come and go as she pleased.

* * *

  
These daily strolls out into the court-along with her subsequent re-confinement each day-continued for a week. Every day at the same time the routine was repeated, Inuyasha obviously intent on establishing his presence as sovereign. More people approached them each day, and the duty fell to Kikyou and Kagome at the end of each outing to repeat the requests of the day to Inuyasha, who would then record them to be dealt with later as he saw fit.

The strolls were sometimes difficult for Kagome, beyond merely the difficulty of being forced into geta and a juni-hito each day. Inuyasha and Kikyou walked always arm and arm, united, and Kagome often felt intensely alone while watching them. She tried for awhile to watch them as much as she could, to get herself used to the sight and fix the idea of them together firmly in her mind, but she soon found that the ache of it never quite went away and gave it up.

Besides that she had also to contend with her lingering anger towards Inuyasha. As they were always in public together she dared not address it aloud, but her resentment of his high-handedness simmered just beneath the surface. He refused to tell her when, if ever, he intended to end the confinement or what he had done to Kouga, as subsequent servants she sent out also failed to find him.

She was pleased to see, though, that despite the recent upheavals it did not seem that any of the clans were as yet on the verge moving against Inuyasha immediately. They seemed content to watch for the time being, and some even seemed inclined to give Inuyasha the chance he needed to prove himself a good leader.

Perhaps it was merely that none of them yet had the means to oppose him openly, but it was a comfort to Kagome to know that he was safe for the time being.

* * *

"I confess to feeling a bit of impatience, Kagura," a voice murmured coolly from somewhere in the darkness.

A small, muffled shriek followed, resounding through the blackness.

"S-Stop," a woman's voice choked out. "Please s-stop. There's…nothing that can be done…"

"There is always something to be done, Kagura," the man's voice drawled lazily. "Perhaps if I squeeze a bit harder I can help you to find some inspiration…"

"No!" the woman yelped. "No…just, please, Naraku-sama…he's locked her away in the Dairi. She only comes out once a day, and he's with her then. There's no way to get near her right now without drawing attention."

"Does the mutt know, then?"

"We are not certain. If he does, he is saying nothing about it and he certainly has not made any move to make use of it yet."

Silence stretched for long moments. Abruptly the woman's scream rent the air.

"Not a good answer, Kagura," the man's voice chided lightly. "For what reason do I keep you if you prove to be so useless? And now I hear that even some within the clan are beginning to waver. Can you not control even that witless bunch of puppets? But I suppose not. A puppet control a puppet? Where is the sense in that? Perhaps I should merely take matters more firmly into my own hands…"

Another gut-wrenching scream, followed by faint sobbing.

"Stop…stop…"

"I am offering you one final chance, Kagura," the man continued, his casual tone unaltered by the woman's obvious distress. "I will intercede on your behalf. Make certain the girl is drawn out. We cannot afford to leave her in his hands or to allow him to gain anymore sympathy. Fail me this time, though, and be assured that I will dispose of you. Never forget that you are expendable, Kagura."

The soft sobbing continued.

* * *

Kagome awoke abruptly, sitting up in her futon. Her cheeks felt wet, and she realized she must have been crying in her sleep. A vague sense of horror still lingered and she wondered what in the world she could have been dreaming about.

Eventually she dismissed it as unimportant, realizing that it was rather futile to concern herself overly with something as trivial as a bad dream. The pale light streaming in from her window told her she had woken far too early, before even the servants usually woke her to prepare her for the court rounds as she had mentally dubbed them.

She puttered about her room lazily, putting on her miko robes for the sake of warmth and combing out her hair. She was contemplating whether or not she wanted to ask for some tea to warm her up a bit when a voice called urgently through the shoji door.

"Miko-sama! Please hurry! The O-Miko-sama awaits you at the front gate and she says it is urgent!"

It took Kagome a beat to process this, but she was up in a flash. She threw on her sandals, grabbed her bow, and made a dash for the front gate.

Midoriko was there waiting for her, her face pale and strained in the early morning light.

"I'm sorry to wake you, child, but I'm going to need your strength," the O-Miko panted, obviously having run all the way to get to her.

"What is it? What's wrong?" Kagome asked hurriedly, her heart already pounding within her chest.

"No time," Midoriko returned, grabbing her hand. "I will explain on the way."

"O-Miko-sama, I apologize, but we are under orders not to allow the Miko-sama out without the Tennō-sama's consent," said one of the guards at the gate, reaching out as if to hold Kagome back.

Midoriko shot him a look that would have made a lesser man cringe.

"Does it look as if I have the time to entertain your nonsense?" she snapped, tugging Kagome out of his reach and beyond the gate. "Go tell the Tennō-sama what I have done yourself if you like, but we will be going now."

She spun around and broke into a run, Kagome trailing after her. The guards called out after them, but they obviously saw that it was no use. Midoriko carried a good deal of weight as the O-Miko and they were reluctant to go directly against that.

"What's going on?" Kagome breathed again, tugging at the strap of her quiver as it bounced against her shoulder.

"When I was meditating this morning," Midoriko replied, swerving sharply to turn a corner into the main avenue. "I felt something wrong. Some great ill will. At first it was far off, but it swiftly grew closer and closer. I soon realized it was heading towards the court. It's been some time since I last sensed a pack of youkai this large, or this angry."

She made another turn, and Kagome realized they were heading towards the northernmost outer gate.

"I cannot say what it is, but there must be some force driving them," Midoriko continued. "Groups this large simply don't form without some guidance. But I suppose that's a concern for when this is over. I need you to lend me your power, Kagome. The court is vast. I have never been able to muster enough strength to create a barrier around it on my own before or I would already have done so. My hope is that the two of us combined will be enough."

"And if we're not?"

Midoriko shot her a dark glance.

"Then I do not look forward to the chaos that will ensue," she replied. "If there's nothing to keep them from it, they'll be inside the court in moments. We have the forces to fight them off, but not quickly enough to keep them from wreaking havoc in the meantime. If we can form the barrier we can keep them at least from attacking those that can't defend themselves."

"How long do we have?" Kagome asked, memories of the attacks on the villages flitting sickeningly through her head.

She could see the gate just ahead.

"Not long at the rate that they were moving," Midoriko replied grimly.

They reached the gate and dashed out. The guards there were startled, staring at the pair as they stood panting.

"I need one of you to go inform the Tennō-sama that there is a swarm of wild youkai heading towards the court," Midoriko said, turning to them. "Tell his Majesty he is needed at the north gate. And I need the other to go to the Tachibana and the other guards and tell them the same. We need anyone we can get here as soon as we can get them, do you understand?"

They hesitated, glancing at one another. Midoriko scowled.

"We'll watch your gate for you, you idiots, so go now!" she snapped.

That got them moving.

"Yes, O-Miko-sama!" they said almost in unison before dashing off.

"Dolts…" Midoriko murmured under her breath as she watched them.

"How are we to do this, Midoriko-sama?" Kagome asked, recalling her attention. "I've never done a barrier of this size before, and normally I've worked through conduits. I don't know how to do it from scratch."

"I set up conduits at each gate this morning after I realized what was happening," Midoriko replied. "I know where each is located so I have the focus points. I just need you to lend me your energy and I will direct it. Hurry, give me your hands."

A feeling ran through Kagome like phantom fingers running down the length of her spine. She turned, wide eyed, to look out at the dark forest that bordered the northern gate. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Midoriko do the same.

"I feel them," Kagome breathed, her skin crawling all over with gooseflesh.

"Kami…" Midoriko murmured, sounding faint. "No. No! There's time yet. Take my hands, child."

She snatched up Kagome's hands within her own, turning the frozen girl forcefully away from the forest.

"Close your eyes and concentrate," Midoriko commanded.

Kagome did so, focusing all of the energy she could muster down through her arms, into her hands, and into Midoriko. She felt the peculiar tingle in her hands and up through her arms as the energy began to move out of her and into the older woman.

"Good girl," Midoriko murmured, her voice slightly strained as she focused both of their energies on forming the barrier.

Kagome continued to funnel her energy through their entwined hands, feeling as if she were pulling from the very soles of her feet for every last bit of it that she could muster. On the fringe of her focus she began to hear something, the pounding of feet. She could sense hundreds of presences moving hurriedly towards the gate. On her other side she could feel the force of the youkai, wrathful and gaining ground every moment…

"Concentrate!" snapped Midoriko, calling her mind back.

Kagome refocused, pushing a surge of energy through her hands into the miko. She was beginning to reach her limit, though, and it was becoming more of a strain to dredge the energy up. Worse yet, she could not feel the barrier forming.

"Midoriko-sama…"

"I know, we're almost there. I just need one more big push from you," the older miko murmured.

There was the tremble of nerves in her voice, though, and her palms were slick with sweat within the confines of Kagome's own hands. She could feel the presence of hundreds of people flanking them now, watching and waiting in tense silence as they worked. She could also feel the youkai pressing ever closer.

Kagome clutched Midoriko's hands more tightly, feeling her limbs begin to tremble as she reached down into the last reserves of her energy. She forced it up through her hands, feeling faintly ill and certain that she was expending more than she could afford to.

She felt something flicker over the court. Once. Twice.

On the third instance the barrier flared into life. Kagome could have shouted for joy.

And then Midoriko collapsed. The barrier flickered once and then winked out of existence entirely.

Kagome's stomach dropped. Her eyes snapped open, taking in in a wild instant the mass of courtiers huddled anxiously just inside the gate and the mass of imperial guards and members of the Tachibana flanking her.

And the barrier was gone without a trace.

Kagome experienced a moment of blind panic, certain that she could not create a barrier out of what little energy she had left and now able to feel the physical crash and rumble of the youkai swarm’s approach.

A hand touched Kagome's shoulder and she spun around, wild-eyed.

"Kagome-chan!"

It was Sango, dressed in full taiji-ya regalia. The familiar sight returned some sense to her.

"Sango!" she cried out, throwing her arms around the older woman.

"Kagome-chan, what's going on?" Sango asked, embracing her in return.

"There's no time," Kagome said, pulling back to arm's length and meeting the woman's eyes urgently. "I need you to arrange the guards and your clan. Form as much of a wall as you can to protect the gate. They're going to try and get in first, I know it. I'll try to get the courtiers to flee, alright?"

Without waiting for a response, Kagome made a dash towards the courtiers. On her way she called out to a nearby guard, ordering him to see to Midoriko. It was obvious that she had merely overexerted herself attempting to create such an extensive barrier, but she needed to be seen to and at least moved somewhere safe.

She came before the mass of murmuring courtiers and raised her arms to gain their attention. Hundreds of eyes fixed on her, anxious for some sort of reassurance.

"Please, everyone, I need you all to get as far from here as possible," Kagome said, raising her voice to be heard. "Youkai are coming and you will be caught up in the conflict if you remain here! Get as far away as possible and warn anyone you see on your way. Do not panic! We will be doing the best that we can to keep them from ever reaching you!"

The crash and groan of trees being torn out by the root reached her ears. Kagome went cold.

It was too late. They were too close. The mass would be upon them in minutes.

"Kagome!"

A blur of red and white landed in a crouch beside her.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome cried, hearing a wild murmur go up among the courtiers at the Tennō's arrival.

"Thank the kami you're here," Kagome breathed. "The swarm is almost here. We tried to create a barrier, but-"

Abruptly her knees buckled. Surprised, Kagome crumpled to the ground. She realized with a jolt how heavy her limbs felt. As she had suspected, she had expended more energy than she had to spare in the creation of the barrier. She could hardly move.

"Kagome!"

Inuyasha dropped down beside her, looping an arm around her shoulders to help her to sit up.

"Oi, Kagome, what's wrong? Are you hurt?"

Kagome shook her head weakly.

"No time," she murmured. "They're nearly here. A barrier….we need a barrier, or else…"

She managed to lift her eyes to meet his own, wide and bright with worry as they fixed on her face. His eyes shifted from her prone form to the line of trees, trembling with the approach of the swarm, and back again. Abruptly something shifted.

They both felt it clearly, their eyes going to the sword sheathed at his waist. It was pulsing with youki, much as it had done when they had been trapped inside his father's final resting place.

"It wants something," Inuyasha muttered, more to himself than to her. His ears twitched atop his head in time with the pulsing, following the sound as if it were a voice speaking to him.

He stood suddenly, pulling her up and placing her on his back.

"Can you hold on?"

Kagome nodded, winding her arms around his shoulders as tightly as she could manage.

Two swift bounds had them atop the gate. Kagome's vision swum dizzyingly, but she refused to release her hold on the hanyou. Somehow she felt that he needed her with him for this, whatever this was.

Inuyasha pulled the blade free of its sheath in one fluid motion, a crackling flash of youki announcing its transformation as it was freed. The massive blade continued to pulse urgently, the sheer force of its aura almost frightening to Kagome.

But there was no trace of Inuyasha in it. Whatever youki was guiding the blade, it was not the hanyou's.

His father, Kagome realized. His father's youki was guiding it. His father's youki was guiding him to…

Another memory, seemingly random at first, attached itself to this thought in her head. And everything clicked into place.

"Feed your youki into the blade," she murmured to him. "Everything you can muster."

Inuyasha merely nodded, as if on some level he had already understood this. He raised the sword, fixing his eyes intently on the blade, and began to focus all of his energy into it.

Kagome felt the pulse beneath her hands as his youki rose, a strange sensation like bristling fur against her skin. Usually the feel of youki repelled her, crackling along her nerves in small, painful jolts, but there was something warm and comforting in Inuyasha's that made her cling to him more closely.

She felt as his youki began to pulse and saw it almost like a physical thing as it began to swirl around the blade, his energy twining with that of his father. Soon the two were pulsing in tandem, the sheer force of the energies leaving Kagome awestruck.

As if from a great distance she saw the youkai come crashing at last through the line of trees, straight into the ranks of the guards and taiji-ya that Sango had set up to protect the gate.

Midoriko had been right. The sheer number of them seemed impossible, pouring in in a continuous torrent from the depths of the woods. Many of them were smaller youkai, but the amount of malice she sensed in them was astounding.

She sensed Inuyasha wavering at the sight, torn between the desire to remain and the desire to jump into the fray. The guards and the taiji-ya were already thoroughly entangled with the enemy, and the youkai continued to pour in.

"Don't stop," Kagome murmured, pressing herself more closely to his back. "Just a bit more."

He scowled, but glanced back at her and refocused himself. The pulsing resumed, rising swiftly to a fevered pitch. Kagome felt herself holding her breath, her fingers digging into his shoulders as she waited for it…

Something crackled fiercely down the length of the blade.

"Now!" they shouted in unison, and Inuyasha swung the tip of the blade down to dig into the outer wall.

It flared to life in an instant, blazing bright and strong. A barrier of Inuyasha's own youki enveloped the court in its entirety, as had every Tennō's before him running back to the beginning.

"You did it!" Kagome exclaimed, torn between laughter and tears.

"It ain't done yet," Inuyasha replied, eyeing the chaotic fray just below them. "Hang on, Kagome."

Kagome did, and a leap brought them back down near the entrance of the gate. Despite her earlier urgings, a great many courtiers still remained huddled in the gateway, watching the battle rage just outside the walls. They sent up a great cheer at the sight of Inuyasha, each one a witness to the marvel of what he had just done.

Inuyasha stooped down and deposited her among them, just inside the safety of the barrier.

"Stay here," he ordered, meeting her eyes and leaving no room for argument.

He stood and faced the jubilant courtiers.

"Stay inside the walls and you'll be safe," he yelled at them, before hefting his sword and turning to join the fray.

Kagome wanted to call out after him, to go with him, to ask if he would be alright after already having expended that much energy to form the barrier, but the mass of courtiers quickly swarmed around her and blocked his retreating form from her view. She tried to peer around them or even just to stand up, but her limbs refused to cooperate any longer.

They all seemed to be speaking at once, but try as she might she could not comprehend a word of it. Faces swam in and out of her vision, and the sounds of the nearby battle echoed distantly in her ears.

For a brief moment her vision focused on one face just beyond the ring of people that surrounded her. It was Kagura, her features pale and her crimson lips twisted hatefully. Her red eyes blazed as they fixed on Kagome's face, but it was not only anger that Kagome saw there. There was something desperate and frightened, too. Abruptly she turned away, disappearing into the crowd.

Kagome's vision swam once more, and she prayed Inuyasha would be alright.

* * *

Kagome awoke wrapped in the warmth of her futon. For a long moment she stared at the ceiling above her, trying to piece together where she was and how she had gotten there.

At length she made a slow attempt at sitting up, her body practically groaning in protest at the motion. A hand on her shoulder forced her back down, and she realized she was not alone in the room.

"It's only been a few hours," came Inuyasha's voice from somewhere near the head of her futon. "Lay down."

He shifted, moving to the side of the futon so that she could see him. Tessaiga was clutched in one hand and his face was solemn.

"What happened?" Kagome asked quietly, eyeing him for any sign of injury.

"Between the taiji-ya, the guards, an' me we got 'em," he answered. "Some got away, though."

"Was…was anyone hurt?" Kagome asked, though part of her shied away from hearing what she knew the answer must be.

"Some," he answered lowly, confirming her fear. "Some dead, too."

Kagome blanched, her heart sinking into her stomach.

"The Tachibana woman and the houshi are fine," Inuyasha supplied, as if he sensed the root of her fear. "She got hit, but he got her out of the way quick."

"And Midoriko-sama?" Kagome asked, recalling the woman's collapse.

"Still resting, far as I know," he said with a dismissive jerk of his shoulders.

The scowl that surfaced at the mention of the O-Miko's name puzzled Kagome.

"Without Midoriko-sama we might not have known about the attack until it was too late," Kagome said, frowning up at him.

Inuyasha snorted derisively.

"She should have called me first when she realized what was going on," he snapped. "Instead I come here to find she's dragged you off somewhere, and then some guard comes yelling his head off that you're both at the northern gate."

"She didn't exactly have a lot of time to plan out what she was going to do after she realized what was happening," Kagome replied, though she silently conceded that the more proper course of action would have been to alert Inuyasha first. "She thought that between the two of us we might be able to form a barrier to avert the attack. We tried, but no matter how much energy we fed into it, it just wouldn't hold."

"And she nearly got you both killed in the process," Inuyasha snapped, glaring down at her.

"But she didn't," Kagome pointed out, still exhausted and hoping to diffuse the argument before it started. "And you were able to form one in time. You were able to form a barrier, Inuyasha!"

The last escaped her almost as laugh, the memory of those moments atop the wall flooding back suddenly. He had really done it, and for the entire court to see no less.

He nodded, but hardly looked as if he believed it himself.

His eyes slid to the sheathed sword he carried, looking entirely innocuous in its untransformed state. He watched it as if in askance, waiting for it to confirm that he truly had done it.

"I felt your father, I think," Kagome commented, watching his face.

His eyes shifted quickly back to her.

"Or his energy, at least," Kagome continued. "It was all around the blade, like he was guiding you. Like he knew you could do it if you just wanted to enough, if you just had a reason."

"A reason?" Inuyasha echoed, listening to her with an unexpected earnestness.

"A reason," Kagome confirmed, smiling slightly at his sudden seriousness. "You never had one before, right? And you could never form a barrier before, right? But it's not that you couldn't do it. You were able. You were strong enough. You just needed a reason to really want to do it."

Inuyasha frowned, but said nothing. Nor did his eyes leave her. Instead they grew darker, more intent. Kagome felt her own smile fade, a sense of apprehension filling her. She turned her eyes away from his, but they drifted back again as if of their own volition. She wanted to look away, but he had caught her.

"A reason…" he muttered to himself, his eyes searching her face.

And then he reached out tentatively, one clawed hand coming to rest lightly on the side of her face.

For just a moment, Kagome believed that he loved her.

Then the moment passed, and Kagome felt the devastation of the truth all over again.

"Stop," she choked out, feeling tears rise in her throat.

Inuyasha froze. She felt his entire body tense through the calloused palm pressed warmly against her cheek.

"Please just stop it," Kagome murmured miserably, squeezing her eyes shut and turning her face away.

Tears escaped her sealed lids. She wished desperately he would just go away.

"What…What did I…?"

He sounded confused, almost childlike. She had hurt him, and that hurt her even more.

"I need to leave," Kagome bit out unthinkingly. "I need to leave the court."

Thick silence filled the room. 

Kagome pressed her face harder against her pillow, tensing. Perhaps it shouldn't have been said, but she'd said it and she would not take it back.

"Is this…Is this about that fucking wolf?" Inuyasha ground out at last. "You promised, Kagome! You promised me! And now you're just gonna choose him over-"

"It's not about Kouga!" Kagome broke in, shaking her head. "It's about me. It's only about me. And I know I made a promise, and I'm sorry, but if I stay here I'll only be in your way!"

"No," Inuyasha snapped fiercely. "No, Kagome. You're not going anywhere! You promised, and you're staying here. You…You're the reason-"

"I'm in love with you."

She spoke the words softly, but they rang like a clap of thunder through the room. She was afraid of what he was going to say, afraid of what she might feel if he said it, and the words escaped her before she could stop them.

She couldn't even sense him breathing behind her. She didn't want to turn and see whatever might be written across his face.

"I'm in love with you," she forced herself to continue, tears tracking miserably down her face into the pillow below. "And I'm sorry. Because you're to marry Fujiwara-sama soon, and you're the Tennō, and it's all absolutely impossible. I only came here wanting help for the villages. I never meant for it to be this way. But it hurts now, when I'm with you, because I want things that are impossible. It's not your fault, but I've tried hard and I haven't been able to stop it yet."

"I just…I need some time away. I need some time to myself to fix it, or else it can only cause trouble for the both of us. I can go out and see to the villages, make sure they know what you're doing for them here. I promise I'll come back. I will. I just need…I need time. I'm sorry, Inuyasha. I'm so sorry."

She paused, drawing a shaky breath. The silence behind her was deafening, and she had no idea what might be going through his mind.

"Please, Inuyasha. Please. If you care anything for me, you'll let me go."

An eternity of silence seemed to stretch between them. Kagome bit her lip, feeling vulnerable and deeply ashamed. It had to be said, though. She would never be free of it otherwise.

"Alright."

The word was quiet enough that she nearly missed it, strained and final.

She felt Inuyasha rise behind her. He stood there for a beat, and she could feel his eyes on her.

"Thank you, Inuyasha," she said softly, her eyes sliding shut.

He did not reply, but turned and left the room.


	21. Of Loose Ends and Love Lost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's mini-history lesson:
> 
> Nihon Shoki: Written in the early Heian period, this is one of the central texts of Shintō. Not central like the Bible is central to Judeo-Christian faiths, but central in that it lays the mythological foreground for a lot of Shintō belief. Also contains accounts of the court during the period.
> 
> Nenju necklace: In the series it is sometimes called the kotodama nenju because of the words that activate it. It is the necklace the Kaede gives to Kagome at the beginning of the series to put on Inuyasha in order to control him. It is made of magatama and mala beads.

* * *

The pearlescent gray light of early dawn streamed through Kagome's window, sliding across her closed eyelids. Slowly her eyes flickered open and she blinked lethargically in the early glow of a new day.

For long moments she lay, suspended pleasantly somewhere between reality and dreams, her mind blank. Eventually, though, it occurred to her to wonder when and how she had gotten back to her room. A frown creased her brow.

Vague images of Midoriko and a youkai swarm and Inuyasha and a mass of courtiers surfaced, but they were hazy at best. How much of it was real? How much of it was a dream?

She made an attempt to sit up, but her body protested the movement. Her muscles felt as sore as if she had run for days on end, just the way they always did after she overexerted herself spiritually. So the parts concerning Midoriko and the youkai swarm were real, at least.

But there was something else after that, something that took shape much more reluctantly in her mind. Inuyasha had been there…they had been in this room together…

Her eyes swept the length of the room, but if he had been there, there was no sign of him now. Kagome's frown deepened. The harder she tried to recall the details of what had happened, the more elusive they became, images and sounds dissolving into a haze. Perhaps it really was no more than a dream.

The clattering of the shoji door on its hinges drew her attention, the screen sliding open to reveal Chūsei. The woman paused in the doorway, her eyes widening as they met Kagome's.

A grin lit her face and she hurried into the room, only perfunctorily observing shoji etiquette in her haste. She came to kneel beside the futon, placing a helping hand on Kagome's back as she struggled to sit up and greet her.

"I'm so glad to see you awake, Kagome-sama," she said, relief thickening her voice. "The way you were sleeping you seemed dead to the world. Can I get anything for you? Something to eat? Tea?"

Kagome shook her head, smiling at the woman despite the ache in her muscles that even just the act of sitting up caused.

"I'm sorry to have worried you," she said. "How long was I asleep?"

"Nearly a day and a half now," Chūsei replied, peering into her face to make certain she looked well. "His Majesty instructed me to keep checking in on you to make certain your condition didn't worsen, and he said you would likely be tired for quite some time. I suppose it's no real wonder, though, considering what you helped to do. The whole court is still in awe over it."

Kagome blinked, surprised both at how long she had slept and the sudden sinking feeling in her stomach at the mention of the hanyou.

"Inu-...the Tennō-sama was here?" she asked.

"His Majesty brought you here after the battle at the gate finished," Chūsei replied. "I think his Majesty intended to stay until you awoke to make certain that you were alright, but something called his Majesty away in a hurry after an hour or so. Loose strings to tie up after all of that chaos, no doubt."

The sinking feeling deepened in the pit of Kagome's stomach, but the source of it continued to hover just out of reach. She bit her lip, concerned that she was forgetting something important.

"Are you alright, Kagome-sama?" Chūsei asked, sweeping the fringe of her hair aside to press a hand to her forehead. "You look pale. Are you certain I can't get you something to eat?"

"How…what did his Majesty look like, when he left?" Kagome asked, meeting the older woman's eyes searchingly. "Did he…was his Majesty…alright?"

Chūsei's brow furrowed slightly at the strangeness of the question. Her lips pursed thoughtfully as she considered it.

"Brusque," she said at last. "His Majesty was brusque…and a bit terse. And his Majesty seemed to be in quite a hurry. I merely assumed the Tennō-sama had urgent matters to attend to after all that went on. Why? Do you think something is the matter?"

"No, no," Kagome said, waving off her concern. "I just…want to make certain his Majesty is alright. The Tennō-sama expended a good deal of energy in creating the barrier, and then went off to fight the youkai, as well. I just hope his Majesty didn't overexert himself."

Silently she lamented that Chūsei's description of the hanyou was entirely unhelpful. He was always brusque and terse and rude and eager to get away from anyone he was not well acquainted with. Even with people he was well acquainted, for that matter. But perhaps that simply meant he was the same as ever.

Yes, that must be it. He was fine and she was worried over having overslept at such an important time. The knot in her stomach eased a bit.

"How has the court been since the attack?" Kagome asked, deciding it best to shift her attention to more important matters.

A wide grin stretched the length of Chūsei's round features, her eyes gleaming.

"I've been getting non-stop reports from the servants since it happened," she said, obviously very well pleased with herself. "A good number of the courtiers were at the gates to witness the whole thing-everyone was curious when they saw the guardsmen and the taiji-ya all suited up and heading that way- so thankfully there's little they can do to deny what his Majesty's managed to do."

"It's always been a favorite critique among the courtiers that his Majesty wasn't able to form a barrier like those who ruled before him. They took it to mean that his Majesty was too weak to protect them, and certainly too weak to rule them. Well, there's no talk of weakness now, I'll tell you."

"The previous Tennō-sama, may their souls inhabit peaceful places, took time to form their barriers. Days, weeks, months for some. I suppose creating one big enough to cover the entire court just takes preparation. But his Majesty did it in all of just a few minutes. Just boom, and there it was!"

She spread out her arms in an expanding gesture, as if to illustrate the creation of the barrier. A grin tugged at the corners of Kagome's lips as she watched the excitement illuminating the woman's features.

"Anyway," Chūsei continued, her hands returning to her lap. "From the reports I've been brought of some of the clans, the response has been favorable. The clans inclined to support his Majesty before have even more reason to. His Majesty saved them from what might have been a massacre, after all. And those still inclined to oppose his Majesty are much more reluctant to do so, now that they realize it's no weakling they'd be going up against if they chose to rebel. And as far as claims from the courtiers go of the illegitimacy of his Majesty's right to rule, there's little ground left for them to stand on on that count."

The grin had stretched until Kagome was beaming, bolstered by the good news. She had known the creation of the barrier would work to Inuyasha's advantage, but she had not realized to what extent. She could scarcely wait to meet with the hanyou and discuss everything.

"Oh!" Chūsei exclaimed suddenly.

She reached into the front of her robes, drawing forth a folded piece of parchment. She handed it to Kagome.

"I was so glad to see you awake that I nearly forgot," she said. "This was delivered yesterday from his Majesty, to be given to you when you woke up."

Kagome eyed the piece of parchment in her hand, a chill stealing over her. The thing itself looked innocuous enough, but the knot in her stomach tightened once more. She wondered at her own unease as she hesitated, reluctant to open the note.

"It's chilly in here," Chūsei said softly, seeing the younger woman's discomfort plainly. "I'll go fetch you some hot tea, alright, Kagome-sama?"

Kagome nodded, her eyes flickering away from the parchment for a brief moment to offer the serving woman a weak smile of thanks. Somehow she felt she would rather be alone to deal with whatever was to come next.

Chūsei bowed and left the room silently.

Kagome stared down at the scrap for several long moments, trying to convince herself it was silly to be so apprehensive over something so small. For all she knew it was just Inuyasha reminding her that she was still under confinement, or any number of other little things.

Something told her this was not the case.

Taking a steadying breath, Kagome opened the note.

There were only a handful of lines scrawled in Inuyasha's messy but improving hand:

_Arrangements have been made. You'll leave in a week when I've finished drawing up something you can offer to the villages in return for allegiance. The confinement's been revoked. Take guards if you go out._

Kagome stared blankly down at the words. The chill she had felt before overwhelmed her now, her hands numb where she gripped the note.

Everything came back to her in a dizzying rush. Her exhaustion and confusion and confession. Her pained plea and his terse response.

Oh kami, what she'd revealed to him…Kagome let the note slip from her grasp, her hands falling to clench in the fabric of her blankets.

No wonder she had not wanted to remember. It was shameful, the way she had broken down and burdened him with her feelings. After working so hard to keep them from him, to keep him from seeing her weakness, she had betrayed herself and him under the strain of a moment. She gritted her teeth against a sob she could feel welling in her throat.

And his note…it was cold. There was no trace of him in it, no hint of how he might be feeling. The language was distant, perfunctory and uncolored by his usual rough manner. He had not even bothered to sign his name, nor her own. Had she not recognized the hand it was written she would have doubted Inuyasha had written it at all.

But he had. He was dismissing her, putting her and her feelings away from himself entirely. And it hurt.

She knew she had asked to go. She knew she needed to go. And it still hurt.

Kagome swiped fiercely at the tears tracking down her face, cursing herself. Perhaps it was not too late. She could tell him that she had simply been exhausted and had ended up saying something she did not mean. She could take it all back and they could go back to normal.

But could she really do that? Even if she could convince him that everything she had said was nothing more than the ramblings of an exhausted mind, could she continue to stand beside him and pretend she felt nothing? Pretend that it did not hurt her to be so close to him and yet know that he belonged entirely to another woman?

Kagome knew that she could not. Sooner or later she would crack under the strain again and the next time might be far worse, for her and for him.

It wasn't about her. It wasn't even entirely about him. It was about Japan and its people. She needed to find that focus again, and she needed time and space to be able to do it. Perhaps what she had said had been the rash impulse of a moment, but she couldn't take it back now. She needed to press forward.

A light tapping at the shoji startled her.

"Kagome-sama?" Chūsei called tentatively. "I have tea, and I brought food, as well, in case you're hungry."

Kagome released a shaky breath, swiping at her cheeks with the sleeves of her yukata. She picked up the note resting in her lap, a pang going through her once more at the sight of those distant kanji.

Decisively she folded it until it was no more than a small square, tucking it away into the front of her robes.

It was time to start moving on.

"Come in."

* * *

Kagome spent that second day of the week she had left in the court recuperating, her body dictating that there would be no vigorous physical activity. She got from Chūsei further reports on what was happening within the court, took a short walk in the gardens to at least begin to shake the ache from her limbs, and made a list of all of the things she needed to take care of before departing.

Thankfully by the second day she felt well enough to go out into the court and with the confinement lifted she was free to move about as she pleased. So she dressed early that day and set out with two guards at her side.

Despite the early hour there were a number of courtiers already milling about in the streets. Many paused to watch as she went past. Some even approached, wishing to speak with her. The guards tried to keep them away at first, but Kagome assured them it was alright. She doubted that anyone would attempt anything in the broad light of day with a guard practically stuck to either side of her.

Mostly they wanted to congratulate her on her part in what had happened at what was now being called amongst them the Battle of the North Gate, or to thank her for helping the Tennō to create the barrier to protect them. She deflected all of this, laying the credit solely at Inuyasha's feet. She assured them that the barrier was all his own, entirely his creation.

Some pledged their loyalty before her. Others wanted to touch her robes, as if they might offer some blessing. Yet others asked her when his Majesty intended to resume coming out into the court.

Eventually she made her way to the Tachibana residence, feeling both pleased and dissatisfied by turns as she entered. It was good to see such a positive reaction to what had happened, but there had to be some way to clear up the fact that it had all been Inuyasha's doing. If the barrier was not solely his own, then it would give the courtiers another detail to pick at.

Of course he could solve that problem easily enough by going out into the court and speaking about it as he had done before with his 'strolls'. Obviously, though, he had not been out since the incident.

Kagome wondered if she should send him a note asking him to resume the practice. She wondered what had made him stop them in the first place. Certainly he would get a much more positive reception now than he ever had before.

She tucked those musings away for another time as she reached the small hall in the back of the Tachibana residence which held all of the clan's weapons. The servant at the door had informed her that Sango would be there.

Surely enough she was, seated in a far corner of the wide room with her wakizashi in her lap. She was polishing the small, sharp blade, examining it closely to make certain that the edge did not need sharpening. An array of other weapons were lined up and front of her as if she were taking inventory.

"Sango-sama," Kagome called as she stepped into the room, pleased to see her friend after what felt like a long time.

Sango looked up, a bright smile blooming across her face at the sight of her. She sheathed the wakizashi in one smooth motion and rose to greet her, Kagome making her way across the room to meet her in the middle. There was a slight stiffness to the noblewoman's gait that Kagome noticed as she came.

"Kagome-chan!"

Sango threw her arms around the smaller girl, embracing her warmly. Kagome returned the hug with equal enthusiasm.

"I'm so glad to see you up and about," Sango said, pulling back to arm's length to get a better look at her. "I caught a glimpse of you once after the fighting was over and you were out cold. I tried to go to you, but his Majesty carried you off before I could reach you."

Kagome's smile faltered slightly, but she quickly shook it off. She noticed once more that Sango seemed to be carrying herself strangely, her hips angled so that she took all of her weight on her left side.

"What about you?" Kagome asked, recalling a snippet from her conversation with Inuyasha when she had woken the first time after the fight. "Are you alright? Your leg…"

Sango's smile turned sheepish and she shifted self-consciously, forcing her weight back onto both legs. There was a flash of a grimace across her features, but that was the extent of the discomfort she would allow herself to show.

"It's nothing," she said, waving a hand dismissively. "Truly. Hardly a bruise. A youkai caught me off my guard during the fight, but Miroku-sama came to my rescue."

A light flush colored her cheeks at the mention of the houshi's name, her gaze sliding to the floor between them. Kagome grinned despite her concern.

"Are you certain you don't want me to look at it?" Kagome said. "I can likely heal it for you, if it's hurting. It shouldn't take long at all."

Sango shook her head, the blush deepening.

"No, no," Sango said. "I couldn't ask you to. You must still be tired after what happened at the gate, and I don't want to exhaust you. Besides…."

She murmured something so lowly that Kagome could not catch it, her blush spreading all the way to the tips of her ears.

"What was that, Sango-sama?"

Sango glanced up at her from beneath her lashes, her embarrassment obvious.

"I said, Miroku-sama has been coming every day to check in on me," she reiterated lowly.

The unspoken 'so there needs to be something for him to check in on' did not escape Kagome. Her smile widened and she shook her head, unable to keep from being amused at her friends' antics. They were so very close, but when it came to their feelings for one another they both seemed to have a colossal blind spot.

"I'm certain Miroku-sama would come to check in on you even if you were not injured," Kagome said.

Sango looked up at her, her eyes tentatively hopeful. Kagome nodded, and a grin crept shyly across the noblewoman's face.

"Yes, well…"

She turned suddenly, pressing her hands together in a businesslike manner and effectively putting that conversation to rest.

"I am nearly ready, I think," Sango said. "I was just checking some of my gear to make certain it is all in prime condition. The servants have begun packing for me and-"

"Wait, ready for what exactly, Sango-sama?" Kagome interrupted.

Sango turned back, blinking at her bemusedly.

"For the trip out to the villages, of course," she replied. "Have you not started preparing yet? We leave in just a few days, Kagome-chan."

"You're coming with me?" Kagome said, her eyes widening. "But…how? I didn't think anyone even knew I was going yet."

"The Tennō-sama sent word just yesterday morning. His Majesty assigned Miroku-sama and myself to go with you, along with a few members of my clan. The Tennō-sama did not tell you?"

Kagome shook her head.

"No," she replied. "I was coming to tell you that I would be leaving, and to ask if you might accompany me."

"Well, it seems as if his Majesty has already taken care of everything for you. Of course, I would have come with you whether or not I was ordered to," Sango said, pleased at the idea that he friend had thought to come to her.

Kagome offered her a smile, though for a moment her mind was occupied with the hanyou. Had he made arrangements to get her out of the court more quickly, or was this his parting act as her avowed protector? She couldn't be certain. Perhaps it was both.

She pushed those thoughts away. Neither answer would really satisfy her anyway.

"There is something else I wanted to discuss, Sango-sama," she said.

Sango's brows lifted expectantly.

"I wanted to make certain that taiji-ya from your clan are in place around his Majesty before we go," Kagome said. "I saw that some are among his Majesty's personal guard already, but I wanted to make certain that we replace the entire unit with those you know to be loyal."

"Are you concerned for his Majesty's safety?" Sango asked, frowning. "There have not been threats towards his Majesty, have there? I had thought the mood in the court seemed quite good after what happened with the youkai swarm."

"No, nothing like that," Kagome replied, waving a dismissive hand. "There's nothing in particular to be concerned over. I just…I want to make certain that his Majesty has nothing to worry about before I leave, is all."

Sango's eyes sharpened on her face, catching something in her expression. Kagome lowered her eyes, avoiding the older woman's scrutinizing gaze.

The truth was that guilt ate at her. She needed to leave, she had perfectly good reasons for it, but she was nevertheless breaking a promise. Inuyasha's words during their fight, his protest that she had promised to stay with him, echoed in her ears. She was breaking her promise.

The least she could do, then, was to make certain that she did all she could for him before leaving. If she could at least leave him with everything organized, every detail taken care of, then perhaps the hanyou might not hate her by the time she returned.

Assuming, of course, that he did not hate her already…

A gentle hand on her shoulder cut those thoughts short. Kagome met her friend's concerned gaze.

"I promise I will have it done for you before we set out. I will hand pick the rotations and put someone in charge of them that I am certain I can trust," she said, pressing her shoulder reassuringly. "And I will make certain to confirm with his Majesty, as well, so that there can be no misunderstandings. But are you alright, Kagome-chan? You look exhausted."

Kagome frowned, surprised. After more than a full day's time spent resting she had thought that her appearance would at least be back to normal.

But, no. The earnest concern in Sango's face was for something much deeper than the mere appearance of exhaustion. Kagome smiled slightly, touched despite herself by her friend's ability to read her so well.

"Things…things with the courtier have gone worse than I expected," Kagome offered softly, knowing that Sango would understand the oblique reference.

It took a moment, but the way that Sango's expression crumbled told Kagome that she had understood indeed. She hurriedly gathered Kagome up in her arms, pressing her close. Kagome did not resist the gesture, though she bit her lip hard in a valiant attempt to hold back the tears that pricked up in her eyes.

"Oh, no. Oh, Kagome," Sango crooned. "So that's what it is. What happened? What did he do to you? I swear, I will-"

"No, no," Kagome cut her off, interrupting whatever violent plans for revenge her friend might be forming. "He…he didn't do anything to me. He was nothing but kind to me. Maybe that's why it feels so awful. I…told him how I felt. I knew nothing could come of it, but I…"

She trailed off, shrugging within Sango's embrace. Drawing in a deep breath, she swallowed back the tears threatening. In the past two days she had cried more than she deserved to considering it was no one's fault save her own.

"Kagome," Sango murmured softly, leaning her back just enough to look into her eyes. "Oh, Kagome. That was very brave of you. Truly. Even if nothing comes of it, it is better to have said it. Even if you feel that you regret it right now, I am certain with time you will be glad. It would be far worse to continue allowing it to eat at you as you have been doing."

"And what of you, Sango-sama?" Kagome returned quietly, meeting the older woman's gaze.

Sango blinked.

"What-?"

"Certainly you are braver than I," Kagome pressed, taking hold of her friend's shoulders. "Will you continue to allow your feelings to eat at you while praising me for voicing mine?"

Sango flushed, frowning.

"Kagome, that is…" she floundered, lowering her gaze. "The Houshi-sama and I…it is a different matter entirely."

"Only in that there is hope for you and Miroku-sama," Kagome said. "Please, Sango-sama, if you would only speak to him, tell him how you feel, I'm certain he would not reject you. He…never mind. I just…I want the both you to be happy. Someone should be around here. And I know that you two would be happier together than you both are now."

Sango shook her head, pulling away gently.

"Kagome, I cannot-"

"Please, Sango," Kagome said. "Just consider it. I want you to be happy. I need someone to be happy. The two of you will have plenty of time together once we set out. Just think about it. For me."

Sango glanced up at her, the resolute resistance in her jaw softening a degree. She released a small sigh.

"Fine," she relented. "I will promise to consider it. On one condition."

She held up a finger, illustrating the one condition. Kagome nodded readily, waiting for her to continue.

"I want you to promise me to think not only of the happiness of others, but of your own, as well," Sango said firmly. "I know you would much rather focus on the people around you, but sometimes I cannot help but feel that you are only too ready to give over your own happiness. As if it is not important. As if you are not important. And it saddens me to see it. As much as you want for me to be happy, don't you think that I want the same thing for you?"

Kagome frowned, hesitating. Her eyes slid away from Sango's.

"What…what if happiness simply isn't a part of that path that I am supposed to walk?" she said at length.

A beat of silence stretched between them.

"Then I will find a different path for you," Sango said with unexpected fierceness. "But do not expect me to sit back and watch you sacrifice yourself, Kagome! Before…before you came to the court, I knew what my life was going to be. The same as my mother's life. The same as her mother's life. Not a bad life…just the same life. The same life that everyone in the court seems to lead."

"And then you were here, thinking differently and speaking differently and putting so much effort into everything. And I began to think that things might change. That I could change them, if I chose to. That perhaps I could have a part in choosing who I was to be, rather than simply accepting the life that I had been born to."

"So don't you dare think that I will simply allow you to sit back and accept some sad notion of fate that has taken hold of you after all that you have given to me. I will find you a new path, and I will drag you down it every step of the way if I have to!"

Sango's lower lip trembled slightly, her eyes bright and fervid behind a sheen of tears as she met Kagome's wide-eyed gaze.

"Sango…"

"You can worry about changing the world," Sango pressed on, swiping at the tears beginning to track down her pale cheeks. "But I am going to worry about you. I will not allow you to be the one who has to suffer for everyone else, do you hear me?"

Kagome nodded, rushing forward to embrace her friend once more. Sango's arms came up around her immediately, and the two clung there together for long moments.

No one save her family and Kaede-sama had ever cared so deeply about her welfare, Kagome reflected as she pressed her face to her friend's shoulder. And she knew Sango. She knew that the noblewoman meant every word of it, and that she would fight until the end for her. It was such a warm feeling, soothing away some of the ache of the past few days and weeks.

"You are the dearest, strongest friend that ever was," Kagome murmured feelingly. "How could anyone fail to be happy knowing that you are on their side?"

Sango squeezed her more tightly, sniffling.

"We have a promise, then?" Sango murmured, her voice slightly roughened by tears. "We both will do some serious thinking, right? And we'll both be happy. Together we will be happy."

Kagome nodded, a small smile tugging at her lips.

"It's a promise. Together, we'll be happy."

* * *

Kagome spent the remainder of the day with Sango going over her choices for Inuyasha's personal guard as well as marking out a few central places that they both felt should be periodically patrolled. Once they had discussed everything to their mutual satisfaction, Sango quickly wrote it all down and asked a servant to deliver it to the Tennō-sama. Once he approved it everything would be in place.

Kagome had intended to visit Miroku and Shippou to speak with them about the trip as well, but as Sango assured her they were already in the midst of packing she decided against it. She would see them when it was time to set off, and there were still a great number of things she needed to make sure were seen to before then.

Instead she returned to the former Chūgū's residence to confer with Chūsei. She had already asked the woman to begin confirming her connections to servants within the various clan houses and they sat together well into the night discussing the servants that Chūsei had convinced to help her. Surprisingly there were a great many who were willing, and the network she had managed to form extended quite a way.

Sadly, though not surprisingly, Chūsei had been unable to get hold of any servant within the main residence of the Taira clan. Kagome wished that she knew where exactly the wolf Lord had gotten to that she might discuss that matter with him, but there was no helping it for the moment. She would simply have to find another way of keeping track of them in his absence.

Chūsei had managed to find a number of servants within the main Minamoto residence, though, which was encouraging. Though they were nowhere near as vocal in their opposition to Inuyasha as the Taira, Kagome remembered well their ambivalence towards his rule. As one of the remaining three primary clans of the court it would be vital to keep track of them for the time being.

Initially they drew up a list of the servants, but after a bit of thought Kagome decided to burn it. There was a great deal of risk involved in what they were doing, and she thought it far better that there be as little evidence of it as possible. She instructed Chūsei to follow her lead and to only communicate with the servants and give reports in person.

Of course, the only person that Kagome trusted to receive Chūsei's reports was Inuyasha himself. Which created a bit of a dilemma for her, considering that she could not simply send him a note to inform him of everything. No, it would require a face to face conversation, something that she did not feel at all equal to.

She added it to her list of things to do, making certain to place it at the very end.

* * *

The following day Kagome spent doing what she had become accustomed to doing the previous week: strolling about the court. The morning before she had left to see Sango she had asked a few of the servants with whom she was well acquainted in the Chūgū's residence to do her the favor of going about the court and making it known that she would be out and about the next day.

She gave the hanyou credit for having come up with such an easy, informal way to spread information throughout the court while addressing its concerns, and she intended to make full use of it.

A great number of courtiers approached her in the course of her walk, more even than when she had accompanied Kikyou and Inuyasha. Many of them had questions for her about what had happened at the northern gate, which she made certain to answer by giving Inuyasha his full due. Some wished to ask for favors, minor healings and blessings. These she made a list of, intending to try to take care of them before she had to leave.

A handful of the courtiers who approached, though, seemed only to want to test her. They questioned her about her knowledge of Shintō, of the kami, of the court, of foreign affairs. Anything, it seemed, that they could think of. Kagome answered as eloquently as she could manage, determined not to prove herself the weak piece in Inuyasha's armor.

She also made certain to tell every courtier that approached her of her impending departure. She informed them she would be going out on an assignment from the Tennō to visit residences outside the court and to assure their protection, as well.

She was purposefully vague, well aware that there would be a good deal of sentiment in the court against bringing the villages into a closer relationship with the capital. Especially considering that they would be coming in in direct support of Inuyasha.

They were surprised at the news, obviously having heard nothing of it beforehand. The thought crossed Kagome's mind that Inuyasha might have been trying to protect her by keeping her movements secret. With a pang she wondered if perhaps he would be angry with her for spreading the word herself.

Still, though, she thought it better that she do it than not. Sooner or later her disappearance from the court would become apparent. When the time came it would seem suspicious if nothing had been said by way of explanation, and the last thing that Inuyasha needed was rumors growing up around her departure.

Certainly the guard he had provided for her would be enough to protect her from anything the courtiers could possibly dream up to hinder her. Besides which she made certain to give no details as to the route she planned to take, so as to avoid any chance of being followed.

By the end of what turned out to be almost a day-long walk, Kagome was certain that the entire court would soon know of her impending departure. She returned to the former Chūgū's residence satisfied, if exhausted, and went early to bed.

Despite her fatigue and the worrisome fact that her list of things to accomplish before departing seemed to be growing, Kagome found herself vaguely grateful for all of the activity that loomed before her as she lay down that night. All of the pressing practical considerations served to keep her from having to think too much on more difficult matters. Matters that she knew she could not afford to dwell on, lest she begin to falter once more.

She could not afford to falter now. For the sake of the villages. For his sake.

* * *

"Obviously you think this news valuable enough to trade for your life, or else you would not have contacted me so soon after such a grievous failure, Kagura."

Tense silence followed the words. There was not even the sound of breathing in the darkness.

"I suppose," the male voice drawled, dragging out the word with painful slowness. "That I can continue to allow you your pitiable existence. At least for the time being. It would be inconvenient to have to find a replacement for you within the clan. Now, what do you say, Kagura?"

Another tense beat of silence.

"…Thank you, Naraku-sama," a female voice grated, the words dragged forth unwillingly.

"Now, then," the male voice continue smoothly, as if she had not spoken. "You do not know the day she is set to leave?"

"No, Naraku-sama. She announced today that she would be leaving, but she was careful not to reveal when. She's at least sharp enough to suspect she might be followed, if not to simply remain where she is."

"Now, Kagura, never criticize the mistakes of your enemy," the man chided coolly. "They will always work to your advantage. And it is no matter. I will speak to the boy. It should be no great feat to have him placed among her guard. In the meantime I will expect you to begin moving in the court once more. Perhaps with her absent, you might actually be able to become an effective tool once more."

The gritting of teeth was nearly audible.

"…Yes, Naraku-sama."

* * *

Kagome went early the morning of the next day to the Chūwain, her breath coming in misty puffs as she climbed the steep steps towards the temple. She tucked her arms deeper into her sleeves, grateful for the shawl she had thought to wrap around her head before setting out. The day was a particularly cold one.

She winced at the biting cold of the water as she went through the motions of purification, the tips of her fingers thoroughly numb by the time she came to bow before the shimenawa. All was silence across the temple grounds, and she was pleased to find she had come early enough to visit with Midoriko before any courtiers arrived. Bidding the silent, sleepy pair of guards who had accompanied her to wait in the main hall, she set off in search of the O-Miko.

It took a small search of the grounds, but at length Kagome found the O-Miko tucked away in a small hall on the edge of the temple grounds. A small fire pit and a few lanterns kept the room comfortably warm, and Midoriko sat bent beside the fire over a long sheet of parchment and an ink stone.

"Midoriko-sama?" Kagome called softly, stepping into the room.

She looked up, brush poised in hand just over the parchment. A few drops of ink dripped down onto a row of flowing, orderly kanji and the O-Miko started, cursing softly beneath her breath. She quickly set the brush back down atop the ink stone, gesturing for Kagome to enter.

"I apologize, Midoriko-sama," Kagome said, bowing before coming to kneel across the fire from the woman. "I did not mean to interrupt."

"No, no," Midoriko said, waving a dismissive hand even as she shot a rather forlorn glance at the smudged writings. "I was hoping that you would come to see me soon. I have been meaning to check in on you since the incident at the gate, but it seems you have been busy since then. I am glad to see you have recovered well."

"You, as well, Midoriko-sama," Kagome said. "I was worried when you collapsed, but it seemed as if it was only exhaustion. Have you been well since then?"

Midoriko nodded, picking up the sheet of parchment and setting it atop a large stack on her left side now that the ink had dried. She offered Kagome a wry smile, spreading her hands before her in a gesture of askance.

"I have been quite well, save the dressing down I received from his Majesty after the fact," she said. "The Tennō-sama thought I handled things rather poorly, and while I can certainly see my mistakes in retrospect, I dare say his Majesty was far more displeased with my having involved you than anything else. His Majesty railed on at me for quite some time about it."

Kagome only just managed to conceal a wince, a heat beyond that of the fire rushing up to suffuse her cheeks. She folded her hands in her lap, embarrassed and deeply reluctant to touch upon the subject.

"What is it that you are working on, Midoriko-sama?" she asked, gesturing to the stack of parchment.

Midoriko raised a brow, eyeing her curiously for a moment. The attempted subject change had not been a smooth one. She relented, though, at the discomfort written plainly across the younger miko's features.

"The Nihon Shoki," Midoriko said, hefting the substantial pile for Kagome to see. "The previous Tennō-sama commissioned it before his Majesty's passing, may his soul inhabit peaceful places."

"Nihon Shoki?" Kagome echoed. "What is it? A history?"

"Yes," Midoriko said. "Ranging from the creation of the world to our own days. Stories of the kami. Stories of the Tennō. Stories of the court. Stories of our nation. The previous Tennō-sama was determined that Japan should have a history, that it might never forget its own triumphs or mistakes."

Kagome eyed the weighty stack of records, a slow frown forming.

"Is that what the history of our nation is, then?" she asked softly. "The court and the Tennō-sama?"

Midoriko blinked, a slight frown drawing her brows together as she considered this. Realization dawned after a few moments, smoothing her features, and she met Kagome's gaze through the dancing flames.

"I take your point," she said. "It is a bit exclusive, is it not?"

"Perhaps their lives are not grand," Kagome said, shrugging lightly. "But they are lives, precious to the kami, nonetheless. And if we are to speak of our nation, are they not a part of it? What good can it do the court to continue ignoring them, or, when they intrude upon the lives of the courtiers, looking down upon them? What nation can prosper that would ignore the foundation upon which it rests?"

Midoriko nodded slowly, considering the stack of parchment in her hands.

"I will have some revisions to make, then," she murmured to herself, sighing softly. "I am sorry, Kagome. I did not think to consider it…though I suppose that itself is the problem."

Kagome shook her head, offering her a small smile.

"It's hardly your fault, Midoriko-sama. Truly I do not know whose fault it is," Kagome said. "Even if I knew, I am not certain that it would matter. The courtiers and the villagers…at some point a divide opened up between them, and it has only grown with time. The resentments on both sides are deep, when they are even forced to acknowledge one another. But the kami teach that there is no peace in division. Nothing good can come of it."

"Somewhere understanding must be found. I have lived in a village, and I have lived in the court. For all that the trappings are different, the heart is the same, I think. There is great kindness and great weakness everywhere. Perhaps if you begin to tell the stories of the villages alongside the stories of the court, people might begin to see that there is not so much difference as they have grown to believe."

Midoriko cocked her head intently, gesturing towards the young miko.

"Perhaps, then, it is your intent to visit the villages on the way to the residences during your upcoming journey," she said, deeply brown eyes glinting knowingly in the light of the flames. "To…foster an understanding?"

Kagome blinked, then flushed as the implication of the words became clear. A deep chill quickly overtook any embarrassment, though, as another thought occurred in quick succession.

"It was merely a guess, Kagome," Midoriko said reassuringly, reading the horror as it bloomed across her features. "Though an accurate one, to judge by your look. As far as the court is concerned, your mission is on behalf of the residences. You need have no fear of me saying otherwise."

"But how did you guess?" Kagome asked. "Perhaps the explanation I gave was inadequate…perhaps others will guess as you did, Midoriko-sama…"

"There has never been a word uttered within this court that was not subject to scrutiny, Kagome," Midoriko said, shaking her head. "Whatever you had told them, there would have been some that questioned it. Your avowed purpose of tending to the residences on behalf of the Tennō-sama is plausible."

"You have, however, made no secret of your desire to aid the villages in their struggles, and the Tennō-sama has come out in support of your aims. I merely thought it unlikely that you would avoid the villages, now that you have finally been given the allowance of moving freely."

"I do intend to see to the residences, as well," Kagome said, a bit sullenly. "I merely thought it best not to mention anything about the villages until things are further along. If the courtiers begin agitating against it before I can even begin to speak with the villagers, there is no chance that the villagers will ever agree to any sort of attachment or cooperation. I came here intending to tell you the whole of it, Midoriko-sama."

"I suspected as much," Midoriko said, smiling. "And I thank you for the show of faith. I agree that it is wiser for the time being that the court know nothing of your intentions in the villages. It was jarring enough for many of them to hear the Tennō-sama speak of supporting the villagers. Were they to know that his Majesty intends to push forward with it, some might be stirred to action."

Kagome nodded, pleased that she understood her need for secrecy in the endeavor. After experiencing first hand the deep-rooted resentment of the villages towards the court during her last journey with Inuyasha, she was well aware that it would take every bit of tact that she had to get the villages to even consider whatever proposition Inuyasha intended to offer them. It would be paramount to an act of sabotage to inform the court now.

"I had another reason for coming to see you, Midoriko-sama," she said.

Midoriko inclined her head slightly, an indication of her attention.

"I…well, perhaps the request will sound strange," Kagome began tentatively. "But you are the only one I trust will be able to carry it through, Midoriko-sama. In my absence, I hoped you might…act as his Majesty's eyes and ears, so to speak. I mean, certainly his Majesty's freedom of movement within the court has increased greatly since…since he decided to follow a less traditional path, but there is only so much that his Majesty can gain access to. The courtiers are not likely to reveal themselves wholly to his Majesty. But you are in a better position to observe if anything seems to be going awry, and to warn the Tennō-sama. I am sorry to add onto the many duties I know that you already have to occupy you, but…"

She turned an imploring look on Midoriko, unwilling to continue lest she betray a deeper concern for Inuyasha than was befitting the relation of subject to ruler. Midoriko merely nodded, conceding this easily enough.

"I understand," she said. "You need not worry, Kagome. I have no intention of forgetting my pledge of support to you simply because you will not be present within the court. The Tennō-sama has also been proving himself more and more worthy of my support every day, despite his Majesty's…slight pique with me over recent events. I would be glad to keep my eyes open for any signs of discontent in your absence."

Kagome smiled, pleased at her simple acquiescence and relieved at her misinterpretation of her anxiousness. Midoriko could read her well, but thankfully not that well.

"Thank you, Midoriko-sama," she said, placing her hands before her and bowing. "I am glad to have your support. I will certainly need it. I will speak to the Tennō-sama and arrange it that the two of you might meet once every week or so to discuss the situation within the court. Of course, if you need to contact his Majesty at any time in the intervals between meetings, I will be certain to arrange it so that his Majesty is available to you."

"As you will," Midoriko said. "I am yours and his Majesty's to instruct."

"Ah…"

Kagome bit her lip, a thought occurring to her. She wondered, though, if it were a wise one to indulge.

"Something else?" Midoriko asked. "You need not censor yourself for my sake, Kagome. I wish to be of any help that I can."

But there was a need to censor herself, for her own sake if not for Midoriko's, Kagome reflected. Her eyes darted to and away from Midoriko's expectant gaze as she waged a short internal debate.

Truly it would be better not to indulge herself in this whim. It would likely only cause her pain in the long run, and she had been fighting it ever since the notion had first taken hold of her. Yes, it would undoubtedly be better to simply forget about it.

Still...

"I have one last favor I would ask of you," she said, the words escaping her before she could bite them back. "Do you…Do you know of any way to see someone whom you are far from?"

She kept her eyes fixed on the floor beneath her, silently cursing herself. She was on the verge of simply asking Midoriko to forget she had said anything when the woman replied.

"There are ways, though perhaps less of seeing than of…feeling. Sensing, if you will. The methods that I know of would require the consent of the person watched, however. If you hope to keep track of an enemy, I am afraid they would be of little help."

"No," Kagome said quietly. "It…it is a friend that I do not wish to be entirely parted from."

"A friend?" Midoriko echoed, a note of incredulity entering her voice. Kagome did not meet her eyes.

"Would you like me to show you how, then?" Midoriko asked after a moment.

Kagome hesitated, her shoulders tensing. She could still take it back.

"Yes," she said, so softly it was hardly more than a breath of air.

"Come, then. I will show you."

* * *

It took only a handful of hours for Midoriko to assist Kagome in forging the 'bond' that would allow her to remain connected to the person of her choosing within the court, but the two spent the remainder of the day together. Upon Kagome's showing to her the list of courtiers who had requested healings or blessings, Midoriko volunteered to accompany the miko in performing them. Her presence and added power allowed Kagome to complete the list relatively quickly and without having to work herself to exhaustion, as she had feared she might.

She returned to the former Chūgū's residence a few hours after dark had already fallen, too spent to do much more than crawl into her futon. She declined Chūsei's offers of tea and food, settling in to sleep instead.

Tired though she was, sleep did not come quickly. She lay in the dark stillness of her room, the pebbling, round press of the 'bond' she still clutched beneath her pillow stark against her palm. She continued to berate herself for her weakness in having asked for it, but knew she could no more throw it away now than cut out her own heart.

Still, the meeting that awaited her on the morrow was to be a trial of the worst sort. What would he say to her, if anything? What could she possibly say to him? Would she even be able to face him, now that they were both painfully aware of her feelings? What if he despised her now?

Drifting just on the verge of sleep, Kagome twisted and turned for hours until at last her mind exhausted itself. She fell into a fitful sleep, clutching the 'bond' so tightly that she found its shape imprinted on her palm when she awoke the next morning.

* * *

All of Kagome's worrying proved to be for naught the next day, though not for the reason she might have hoped.

She forced herself upon rising to pen a short note requesting an audience with Inuyasha that day, hurriedly sending it off with a servant before she could talk herself out of it.

An hour later saw a reply to her note, delivered to her as she sat with Chūsei in the main dining hall eating the morning meal. Written in a hand that was familiar but not immediately identifiable to Kagome, the return note said simply that the Tennō-sama would be too busy to receive visitors for the next several days.

He refused to see her.

What little appetite she had had quickly abandoned Kagome. Murmuring something to Chūsei about wanting to go for a walk, she excused herself and headed out into the residence's garden.

She found a secluded bridge on the northernmost edge of the garden and took a seat on the rail, the note still clutched in hand. The 'bond', tucked into the front of her robes, weighed heavily against her breast.

For what seemed a long time she stood out in the cold, heedless of the thinness of her robes as she stared down at the note and wondered what exactly she had given away in deciding to reveal her feelings. Whether or not it could possibly be worth this.

Only the interruption of a servant stirred her from her thoughts. The woman stumbled upon her place on the bridge, a look of relief crossing her face at the sight of the young miko. Kagome blinked, hurriedly tucking the note away as the woman approached her.

"Miko-sama!" the woman exclaimed. "Thank goodness. I've been looking all over the gardens for you. If you will, the future Empress has requested that you attend her at her residence."

Kagome only just managed to keep from groaning aloud, though she was certain her expression betrayed more than it should have. She hardly felt like speaking to anyone at the moment, but Kikyou was among the last she would have chosen.

Even so, she could not very well refuse to see the future Empress. Besides which she had meant to speak with the other woman at some point before her departure. It seemed that that encounter was to be now.

"Of course," Kagome said to the serving woman. "Please lead the way."

The woman did so, escorting the solemn girl to the Fujiwara residence. Kikyou awaited her in a small hall of the residence that appeared usually to be devoted to tea ceremony, a mug of steaming tea already awaiting the young miko before the cushion that was meant for her.

The servant woman announced her to the future Empress before excusing herself. Kagome silently braced herself for whatever this encounter might entail as she slid the screen closed before turning and bowing to the older woman. Kikyou gestured towards the cushion opposite her, indicating Kagome should take her seat. She did so, and there was a moment of protracted silence as both women looked at one another, uncertain how to begin.

"Please, drink," Kikyou said at last, gesturing to tea. "I prepared it myself. I hope it is to your tastes."

Obligingly Kagome took a sip, though she could not help but notice the unusually ingratiating manner of the woman. Generally Kikyou seemed coolly polite in her manner, irreproachable but not at all approachable. That she might actively seek hers or anyone's good will…

Kagome set down the mug, offering the woman a tentative smile.

"It is very good, Fujiwara-sama," she said. "Thank you."

Kikyou nodded, offering a small smile of her own. It disappeared quickly, though, and silence fell once more between them.

"Perhaps…you have something on your mind, Fujiwara-sama?" Kagome prompted at last, when she could tolerate it no longer. After receiving the note from Inuyasha she was in no mood to play at pleasantries for long.

"…Yes," Kikyou said, eyes on the mug of tea cradled between her pale hands. "Yes. I called you to speak with you about your…impending departure."

The way she voiced the words, with such extreme care, sent a thrill of cold foreboding through Kagome. This was not the manner of the Fujiwara Kikyou with whom she was acquainted.

"I am set to depart two days hence," Kagome said a bit guardedly, hands flexing and unflexing around the warmth of her ceramic mug. "Is there something you wish to ask of me before I set out, Fujiwara-sama?"

Kikyou lifted her eyes at last, meeting Kagome's. Kagome was taken aback by the depth of feeling she saw there, entirely unguarded.

"Kikyou," the older woman said softly. "Please call me by my given name. We have shared enough, great and terrible, that we can take that liberty with one another."

Kagome was silent, unable to tear her gaze from the older woman's even as her stomach knotted with dread of what was coming.

"What I wish to say to you will likely sound cruel, Kagome," Kikyou pressed on. "Rather, it is cruel. My feelings at this time are ungenerous at best, aware as I am of how you must have suffered to reach this point."

Kagome found herself shaking her head, on the verge of asking her to stop there. She was fragile, raw, held together by only a few worn threads of resolve. She was not certain how much more she could endure.

But Kikyou's shoulders were set resolutely. She set her mug of tea aside purposefully.

"I need to speak my piece with you, Kagome."

"Kikyou, please-"

"Thank you."

The words died on Kagome's lips. She blinked at the noblewoman, at a loss.

"What you have done," Kikyou continued. "Few would be willing to do. And you have done it without hope of reward. Perhaps I am the wrong person to say this to you, but I want you to know that there is someone who understands fully the sacrifice you have made. And that you have earned, a thousand-fold, my admiration and your place here whenever you choose to return, whatever either of those things might be worth to you."

Had she physically struck her Kikyou would have caused less devastation to Kagome. Because suddenly Kagome simply knew.

Kikyou knew-perhaps had known from the beginning-about her feelings for Inuyasha. She knew why she was choosing to leave. She had seen through her completely.

Kagome's lips worked soundlessly, trying to form an apology or a justification or something, but her mortification was too deep for words. For a moment she was afraid she might simply begin to sob in front of the future Empress.

A rustling of silks alerted her to Kikyou's presence beside her before her pale hand settled over the hands tightly clenched in her lap.

"I know you struggled valiantly with your feelings. I watched you do it several times, even as I suspected that perhaps you were fighting a battle no person has the means to win," she murmured feelingly. "Your heart…your heart was good enough to recognize the goodness of his from the beginning. I lay no blame on you, Kagome. You had a thousand chances to give over your struggle and offer yourself up to him. But you chose this instead. I was jealous of you at times, and suspicious, but you have proved yourself the better of the two of us."

"No," Kagome said, shaking her head in a sharp denial. "I'm so sorry, Kikyou. Even knowing about your relationship and your feelings, I…I wish I hadn't…I never intended to…"

"Hush," Kikyou said gently, wrapping her arms about Kagome's shoulder as the tears she had choked back began at last to overflow. "I do not blame you. How could I? Better than anyone I understand your feelings."

Kagome trembled, the last of her fortifications dissolving at the unexpected kindness. She pressed her face to Kikyou's shoulder, both women heedless of any appearance of propriety or the fineness of her robes as her tears stained the silk. As Kagome had long suspected, Kikyou was warm beneath the layers of finery.

"You have made the right choice, Kagome," Kikyou continued to murmur soothingly. "You are protecting us all. My Lord…My Lord is unable to treat you impartially. Were you to stay it could only end poorly for us all. It could only hurt the cause that you have worked so hard for. I am sorry, Kagome, I am sorry that you must suffer so much in doing this. But I thank you for doing it, for all of our sakes."

Kagome nodded against her shoulder, crying harder. It was a strange mixture of pain and comfort, to hear the words she had used so often in the past few days to buoy herself up spoken by the woman who had the least cause to be understanding of her feelings.

"Please," Kagome managed to get out. "I know I've no right to ask it, but please look after him when I've gone. Please support him as much as you can. He has so much to contend with, and I am no longer in any position to be of help to him. Please, please. I can't…I won't be able to go unless I know someone is there for him, looking out for him."

"Of course," Kikyou conceded softly. "Of course. You do not need to worry for my Lord any longer. I am here for him. I give you my word that I will care for him. Rest assured."

Kagome pulled back from the embrace, meeting the woman's eyes. She was vaguely surprised to see tears glistening on Kikyou's cheeks, as well.

"Tell him that you love him," Kagome said, the words twisting her heart inside her chest even as she spoke them.

Kikyou blinked at her, her eyes widening.

"You've never told him, have you?" Kagome pushed on, past the pain it caused her and the part of herself that knew it was not her place to say it. "He needs to hear it from you. He needs to know that someone loves him, and that he's allowed to be happy."

"I have stood at his side for years. Are my feelings not made clear by that alone?" Kikyou said, her gaze sliding away from Kagome’s.

"Kikyou," Kagome said softly, waiting a beat until the woman's gaze returned to her. "He's chosen you. Every day for years and years he has chosen you. What have you got to fear? You have to trust him now. You have to say it to him. Let him say it to you. Just…allow yourself to be happy with him."

Kikyou stared at her for long moments, her features drawn tight with a genuine anxiety that Kagome rarely saw in her. Slowly she nodded.

Kagome rose, feeling thoroughly battered as she bowed to the woman. She swiped hastily at her cheeks, the need to leave rising up in her sharply after what she had just done.

"I apologize, Kikyou," she said. "And I thank you for your kind words. But I need to…"

"I understand," Kikyou said softly. "And if you have need of anything before you depart, please come to me. I wish to do anything that I can for you. Know also that I will not let your cause be forgotten here in the court in your absence. My Lord and I will do all that we can to further it."

Unable to muster a reply, Kagome merely nodded. She bowed once more before turning to go.

She paused, though, her hand on the shoji. Reaching into the front of her robes, she pulled forth the 'bond'. She stared at it for several long moments, silently debating.

"Kikyou?"

"Yes?"

Kagome turned, her eyes fixed on the floor as she proffered the 'bond' to the noblewoman.

"Could you…could you give this to him for me? Tell him it's his choice whether or not he wants to keep it. I know it's silly, but…"

Kikyou rose, taking the 'bond' from her.

"I understand. I will give it to him."

"Thank you," Kagome murmured, unable to meet her eyes.

Turning, she practically fled the room, chased by the knowledge that she had given away the first man she had ever loved.

* * *

With night came solace for Kagome in the form of a moonless sky. Her worries temporarily fled at the sight, and she hurried to dress and escape out to the Goshinboku.

She was disappointed to find the En no Matsubara entirely deserted when she arrived, but consoled herself with the thought that perhaps she had come too early. She settled herself into the tangle of massive roots to wait, bow situated by her feet just in case.

Hours passed in silence and stillness. For a time Kagome amused herself with searching out constellations Kaede had taught her to recognize when she was young, but at last she could no longer avoid realizing it. The night was nearly half over and there was no sign of him.

Toga was not coming.

Picking up her bow, Kagome tried to swallow back her disappointment. Perhaps he had been too busy to come, or had not known that she was to leave soon. She trudged across the garden, her shoulders heavy with the weight of yet another let down.

A figure emerged from the shadows at the opposite end of the garden. Kagome nearly cried out in alarm, stumbling back a step and grabbing for her bow.

The figure did not make another move and Kagome paused, poised to flee. Slowly her eyes adjusted, though, and her hand fell away from her bow.

"Toga?"

He was largely hidden in the darkness of the moonless night, but it was unquestionably him. Still, he made no move even after she called him. He looked tense, almost angry from the little she could see in the stiff set of his shoulders and jaw.

"Toga?" Kagome tried again tentatively, taking a step towards him.

At last he moved, though it was only to take a step backwards.

"I didn't want to come," he bit out. "I shouldn't have come."

Kagome froze, blinking at his outline against the dark.

"What a thing to say to someone who's soon to leave," she scoffed, to cover over the real sting of his words. "You didn't even want to come to see me off?"

He was silent. Kagome was at a loss, thrown entirely by the oddness of his behavior.

"What is wrong with you tonight? Are you alright?" she asked, stepping forward in one last attempt to draw him from whatever mood he seemed to be caught in.

He stepped away from her again, remaining determinedly just beyond her reach in the shadows.

Kagome scowled, hands balling at her sides.

"Fine," she snapped. "Just fine. If this is how you choose to say goodbye to me, then I think we're done here, Toga. I wish you a pleasant life."

Hitching up her bow and quiver roughly on her shoulder, she made to shove past him. She had had more than her share of it lately, and she would not be taking any more from someone who claimed to want to support her.

She had made it several steps beyond him when a hand caught her wrist, bringing her up short. Kagome tensed, preparing to tug her hand free.

His tug came first, though, hard enough that she stumbled back against him. Immediately arms looped about her shoulders, pinioning her against the warmth of his tense frame.

"Don't go," he murmured thickly, and she was uncomfortably aware of how close his lips were to her ear. "Don't go, Kagome."

The words went beyond the immediacy of the moment. Her heart thrumming loudly in her ears, Kagome stood frozen.

"I have to go," she said.

"No, you don't," he snapped, his arms tightening as if he could physically keep her from it. "You can stay here. It can be…we can…You don't have to go."

"Stop it," Kagome murmured sharply. "Just…stop, Toga. I don't know what's gotten into you, but it's hard enough for me as it is. I can't stay. I can’t. Please try to understand that."

"I made a mistake," he said, and she felt a slight tremor run through the arms that held her. "I can't…I can't lose you. I won't."

He clung to her as to a lifeline, and Kagome tensed further. She bit her lip against the warmth she felt curling through her where her back was pressed to his chest, the urge to simply lean back and promise that yes, of course she would stay.

"I will come back, Toga. I promise you I will," she said shakily, bewildered by force of her own feelings. "I just need time. I swear to you, though, that I will come back."

He did not answer, silence hanging between them for long moments. Slowly his arms slackened until he had released her entirely. Kagome hesitated, feeling thoroughly off balance. She turned tentatively to face him.

"It won't be the same, though," he said, his eyes dark as he looked down at her.

"…No. It won't," Kagome admitted softly, her heart twisting as his expression darkened further. "It can't be."

"I didn't want to say yes," he said, so lowly that she hardly caught the words. "But I didn't want to keep hurting you, either. Why…why couldn't it have been simple?"

Kagome frowned up at him, her mind jumping between memories of their handful of meetings as she tried to puzzle out his meaning. She could think of nothing and her lips parted to demand an explanation.

His lips against hers drove that thought from her head.

Her eyes went wide, her heart stuttering to a halt. But his hand cradled her face carefully and his lips pressed against hers with desperate insistence and in a few moments she was lost. Her eyes slid shut and she felt warm, though she trembled from head to foot.

When at last he began to pull away, Kagome nearly leaned up to follow. He did not pull back far, though, as if he could not quite force himself away. They both stood blinking dazedly at one another, breathing slightly too hard. In the chill of the evening the misty puffs of their breath mingled together, floating off into the darkness.

"That…" he panted, his eyes hooded and his pupils vast and dark. "Is why I shouldn’t have come."

And then, before she could collect a single one of the wits he had scattered, he pulled away and was gone, disappearing swiftly into the darkness.

* * *

The next day, her final day in the court, Kagome spent furiously checking and rechecking to make certain that every possible loose end was taken care of. There was hardly a moment in which she was still. She refused to stop and allow herself to think about anything that had happened or that was going to happen. It was all too confusing, and she simply didn't have the energy for it anymore.

She delivered a note to Kikyou regarding the regular meetings she wished to establish between the Tennō, Chūsei, and Midoriko. It explained both Chūsei's network of servants and Midoriko's intention to maintain a watch of the court. She had been reluctant to write it, but she had little other option considering that Inuyasha would not see her. Kikyou promised to deliver the note to him without reading it herself.

She made arrangements with Sango to have everyone meet at dawn the following day at the eastern gate. She knew where she wanted to stop first on their journey and asked Sango to inform everyone of their intended route for her.

By the end of the day she was so thoroughly exhausted from running about every inch of the court that she fell immediately and gratefully to sleep.

The following morning found her at the eastern gate introducing herself to the taiji-ya among her guard with whom she was not familiar. A few she knew already, such as Sango’s younger brother Kohaku and a number of others she had met during her time at the Tachibana residence.

Miroku and Sango were to her left, heads together as they consulted over a map as to the quickest route. Shippou was curled up on the saddle of the horse that was to be hers, still sleepy at that early hour in the morning.

No one had come to see them off, but Kagome had expected no less. She had never made clear exactly when they were to depart to the courtiers, and anyone to whom she was close enough to want to say goodbye was either going with her or already taken care of.

Save one. And on that score Kagome could not help but feel deeply disappointed.

Still, it was now or never. Hesitation would only make things harder.

"Is everyone ready to set out?" she asked.

A chorus of affirmatives met her question and she nodded, signaling for everyone to mount up. She mounted her own horse, shifting the sleeping kitsune to rest in her lap.

"Everyone is clear on where we are headed?" Sango called back to the guard. They nodded in return.

"Good. Keep tight around Kagome-chan, and let's be off."

Sango spurred her horse forward, taking her place at the head of the group as the guard took up position around Kagome. Miroku spurred his horse to ride just alongside her. Taking a deep breath, Kagome urged her horse forward as well.

She kept her gaze determinedly straight ahead, refusing to turn back and look. She simply needed to keep facing forward.

For just a moment, though, she faltered. She turned back to take just one last look at what she was leaving behind for the kami only knew how long.

Perhaps the others would have missed it, but Kagome's eyes were drawn right to the sight. A red-clad figure crouched atop the gate, watching them as they went. Her heart twisted in her chest.

Inuyasha had come to see her off.

She could not make out his expression, but he stood and lifted one hand high for her to see. In it he held a string of mala and magatama beads. It was their 'bond', the nenju necklace she had forged for him.

As she watched, he slipped it over his head.

Kagome bit her lip, smiling even as she swallowed back the tears that welled at the simple gesture. She raised a hand, waving just once in farewell before turning to face forward once more. This time she did not look back.

_Good-bye, Inuyasha._


	22. Of Determination and Downfall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our mini-history lesson for today:
> 
> -chichi-ue: An archaic form of address to one's father. It translates literally as 'father-above', which implies a great deal of filial respect in its usage.
> 
> -chrysanthemum: The seal of the imperial house of Japan, up to the present day, is a 16 petal chrysanthemum. I'm not really sure about the symbolism of it (I couldn't find a text that addressed the ideology behind it), but it has been used by emperors back through antiquity.
> 
> -Kamo no Yasunori: A famous onmyōji of Heian Japan. I haven't addressed it much up until this point, but onmyōdō, or yin-yang divination, was introduced to Japan during the Heian period alongside Buddhism. It's a spiritual practice that synthesizes tenets of Buddhism, Shintō, and Taoism and it became rather popular in the later Heian period, historically utilized and regulated by the emperors of Japan.
> 
> -shinobue: A Japanese transverse flute crafted from bamboo and used often in traditional Japanese folk songs.
> 
> -ōtsuzumi: An hour-glass shaped Japanese drum used often in traditional folk songs.
> 
> -Ryū, Bakeneko, Ningyō, Oni, Tanuki: Some of the more prominent types of youkai that I came across when researching. There are countless kinds of youkai listed in various folk and fairy tales throughout Japan, some that belong to specific types and some that don't correspond to any type. These are some that show up more often than most (along with kitsune, ōkami, and inugami). Their types correspond to dragons, cats, mermaids (or various sea creatures), one-horned giants (these are the kind that most closely resemble 'demons' as we conceptualize them in the West), and raccoons respectively.

* * *

Tendrils of steam curled up languidly from the face of the gray pool, filling the surrounding air with a warm haze. Trees, brush, and a steep, rocky slope hedged the pool closely on all sides, effectively veiling it from the surrounding world. The pool seemed a small, warm oasis in the midst of the waning winter, all silence and stillness.

The peace of the place was quickly shattered by a high-pitched, gleeful yelp, followed quickly by a surprisingly large splash. A small, red-haired head bobbed to the surface of the pool, tiny arms flailing energetically in the warm water to stay afloat.

Kagome, Sango, and the two female taiji-ya who accompanied them chuckled at the sight the kitsune made, moving much more sedately as they laid their clothes out on the rocks to keep them from getting wet.

"Be careful, Shippou-chan," Kagome called, coming to the edge of the hot spring and gingerly testing the water with one foot.

The warmth of it after nearly two weeks of riding wrapped in layers and layers to ward off the chill of winter sent a thrill through her. She slid slowly into the murky, sulfurous waters, sighing as the heat enveloped muscles stiff from too long a time spent on a horse.

Sango slid in beside her, her hands busily pinning up the length of her hair to keep it from getting wet. The two other young women, Noriko and Tomiko, slid in just across from them, their twin sighs of bliss echoing Kagome's own.

"Thank the kami for hot springs," Tomiko murmured, sinking down to her chin in the waters. "It has been such a long while, I had forgotten what a trial it is to be riding for days at a stretch. I ache all over."

Noriko nodded sympathetically, rolling her shoulders beneath the water to work some of the tension from them.

"Mmmm, I know how you feel," she said. "It has been over two years, I think, since I went out on my last mission, and that was only a routine patrol of the perimeters. Even so, I am glad to be back out in the field and useful again, for all the aches and pains it might bring with it. Thank you again, Sango-chan, for extending the invitation to me."

"Not at all. I am grateful to you for choosing to come," Sango said, wading a bit deeper into the pool until she found a half-submerged rock to rest atop. "I only wish more of the clan's women had taken up the invitation."

"Well, you know how it is," Tomiko put in, shoulders bobbing up through and back down under the water as she shrugged. "For all that they train us they do not really seem to expect us to go out. The unmarried girls do not want to go for fear of missing out on an opportunity to make a match or being seen as unfeminine for too much time spent in the field, and the married women are too busy managing their households and having children to have opportunity to go."

"Don't you think that is unfair, though?" murmured Sango, the length of her back pale and graceful as it curled over her upraised knees. "That we have to be the ones to concern ourselves about that sort of thing when we’re just as capable as any of the men of the clan?"

Kagome glanced at her friend. Her face was half-obscured, resting against her knees, but her eyes looked thoughtful. Tomiko and Noriko, too, wore similar looks, though there was a certain resignation in the set of their features that was no longer in Sango's. Silently Kagome wondered if this had been part of what Sango was talking about when she spoken of knowing what her life would be.

A second noisy and disproportionately large splash put an end to any introspection, the resulting wave wringing cries from the four women as it soaked their carefully pinned-up hair. Shippou bobbed to the surface once more, the red fringe of his hair plastered over his eyes. Soaked as they were, the women were hard-pressed to keep from laughing as the kitsune dog-paddled furiously in a blind, disoriented circle.

Eventually Kagome stepped forward to take the kitsune in hand, pushing the vision-obscuring hair from his eyes and guiding him over to the edge of the pool to sit him atop a partially submerged rock. Despite his wriggling she managed to check him over and rinse what remained of two weeks' worth of grime from his skin

"It should be about a week more until we reach the village, right?" Noriko asked, scrubbing unhurriedly at her own skin.

Sango nodded, slipping down off of her rock into the deepest part of the pool. She splashed some water from the spring onto her face, scrubbing until her skin glowed a healthy pink.

"It took about a month by horseback when Miroku-sama first brought me to the court," Kagome supplied, allowing the slippery kitsune to wriggle free of her grasp once she was certain he was clean. "So a week more or so should bring us there."

"We will exchange our mounts for youkai so that we can move faster when we get there," Sango said, wading until she was only half-submerged in the water as she set to washing her shoulders. "My father and a good number of our clan should still be in the area helping to rebuild the destroyed villages, and they have almost all of our clan's youkai mounts with them."

A rustling sounded in the bushes a bit to Sango's right as she set to scrubbing her back and they all paused, glancing towards it. A small brown squirrel emerged, chattering agitatedly, before dashing up the trunk of a nearby tree. Shippou struggled to paddle quickly enough across the pool to reach it and give chase.

"My village should be receptive to hearing his Majesty's offer, as well," Kagome resumed, sinking down up to her chin in the soothing warmth of the waters. "And after I have spoken to them I thought we might all consult as to how to proceed. Speaking to all the villages will likely be impossible, and in all of my time in the court I was unable to find a map that included any villages besides the ones attached to residences, so there's no knowing how many are out there or where they all are."

"Goodness," Tomiko sighed. "Well, with all the work it sounds like we have ahead of us, I'm grateful Shippou-chan was able to scent out this hot spring for us to clean up and relax in. The kami only know when we will get another chance."

Kagome glanced at the kitsune, stifling a laugh when she saw that he had somehow gotten himself caught halfway in a bush while chasing the squirrel. His bare rear-end poked out towards the spring, damp tail flicking excitedly back and forth. The four women exchanged a look before they all burst out laughing.

"S-Shippou-chan, don't get dirty or I'll have to scrub you down again," Kagome called between bouts of laughter.

He jumped at the sound of her voice, tail going completely rigid for a moment. Hurriedly he pulled himself from the bush, jerking back a bit too hard in his haste to escape. He stumbled backwards a few steps, tripping over his own feet and falling head over foot back into the spring. The women nearly snorted with laughter.

Sango, closest to the kitsune, plucked the disoriented boy up out of the water and sat him on the bank as he coughed and sputtered. He cast a baleful glare at the bush through the fringe plastered to his face, as if it had been responsible for his fall. Kagome drifted across the pool to lean beside Sango against the bank on which the kitsune sat.

"Any more squirrels in there?" she teased gently, poking affectionately at the boy's pouting cheek.

Shippou's pout deepened, a red deeper than the flush from the heat of the springs suffusing his cheeks. He shot the bush another glare, angry at having embarrassed himself in front of the women.

"No," he muttered lowly. "It's not a squirrel in there."

Kagome blinked, turning to share a look with Sango. Slowly both of their gazes slid back to the bush.

"It?" Sango echoed, her eyes narrowing suspiciously.

Shippou folded his arms over his chest, nodding.

"He told me not to tell you that it was him who really found the spring," Shippou said. "And that he was hiding in the bush to watch out for you while you all bathed."

As he spoke Sango's hand moved slowly, almost imperceptibly, over the ground until it closed around a sizable stone. Her jaw clenched as Shippou finished speaking, her hand spasming around the stone.

In a motion almost too quick for Kagome to follow, the taiji-ya cocked back her arm and chucked the stone hard into the bush. A yelp resounded and the bush shook as a figure jumped up.

Miroku stood there, clutching his forehead where the stone had struck squarely. He blinked at them all, slowly removing his hand and putting on a too-polite grin.

"Ahahaha, I seem to have wandered away from the camp somehow," he chuckled with feigned lightness, tapping one fist lightly to his temple in a gesture of chastisement for his absent-mindedness. "Pardon the interruption, ladies. Please continue as you were."

A beat of dead silence followed.

Tomiko, Noriko, and Kagome yelled almost in unison, ducking down to cover themselves as best they could beneath the murky water. Shippou smirked, gratified at obviously having paid the houshi back for his earlier embarrassment.

Sango, her face a boiling red, proceeded to pitch everything within arm's reach at Miroku, yelling nonsensically about perverts and womanizers and the absurdity of any woman ever falling for a man like him. Miroku managed to dodge a good number of the haphazardly aimed projectiles, but could not escape taking a few direct hits here and there.

Watching the exchange, Kagome realized with a gasp why exactly the houshi was dodging when he should have been running for his life. Sango, in her mad scramble to find more objects to hurl, was still half out of the water, and as she thrashed about there was a good amount of bouncing…

"Sango-chan!" Kagome yelped, mortified.

Sango paused, glancing from Kagome's wide-eyed gaze to Miroku and then downward to the parts of her body on which Miroku's gaze was none too surreptitiously fixated. Her mouth fell open, her face shifting rapidly from deep red to stark white and back again.

With a shriek that was a confused mix of rage and embarrassment, Sango crossed her arms over her chest and dropped down beneath the protection of the water.

Miroku took the opportunity to toss them all a blithe wave and beat a hasty retreat, calling cheerfully for them to have a pleasant bath and to be careful on their way back to the camp before he disappeared from sight.

Silence enveloped the spring once more in the houshi's wake.

After several moments Kagome waded hesitantly over to Sango, who was still hunched up to her chin in the water and was fairly shaking with either rage or embarrassment. Perhaps both. Kagome laid a tentative hand on her shoulder.

"Sango-chan?"

"He saw them. He definitely saw them," the noblewoman murmured darkly to herself. "Just like those times he used to peek in the court bathhouse…Such a lecher…A womanizer through and through…How could I…? I know. I'll knock the memory right out of his head. That's right, there's no memory for a dead man…"

Abruptly Sango rose and began wading determinedly towards the spot where they had left their clothes. Behind them Kagome could feel Tomiko and Noriko still staring, dumbfounded. Shippou had slipped back into the water and resumed dog-paddling about happily.

Sighing, Kagome trailed after her friend. She had a feeling that without anyone to stop her, Sango would make a genuine attempt to make good on her threats.

It was going to be a long journey.

* * *

In the end Kagome did manage to keep Sango from outright attacking Miroku, though that did not stop her from 'accidentally' dropping Hiraikotsu on his foot while she was polishing it or kicking his futon well outside the circle of the fire's warmth. She refused to speak directly to him for the rest of the night and sat glaring daggers from across the fire.

Noriko and Tomiko were growing wary of the houshi, as well. They had already been subject to several 'accidental' gropes from Miroku since the journey had started, but had largely written the incidences off in light of his status as a spiritualist and the utter nonchalance he displayed in the aftermath.

This, however, was a bit harder disregard. They made certain that their futons were situated well away from his, despite Kagome's assurances that he really was not that bad-just not that good, either.

Kagome, for her part, could only watch bemusedly as the houshi chatted away over-animatedly with the men of her guard who obviously had no idea what had gone on. She had come to expect this behavior from Miroku to a degree, but he had really stepped up his game since they had all set out. Every few days it was something new. And when Sango had been making such an earnest effort to get closer to him, too.

Kagome sighed, shaking her head. Despite how close they had become, the man was in some ways a mystery to her yet. A dirty, lecherous mystery.

After they had eaten, the group quickly settled in for the night to sleep. Miroku made certain to set up wards around their campsites each night, meaning that they could generally rest easy with only one or two people on watch. Those who were not on duty for the night slept soundly around the warmth of a campfire.

Kagome, however, had developed a habit of sitting up after the others had settled in. It was really the only time she could get any semblance of the privacy that she needed.

She had kept a single mala bead from the nenju necklace she had strung together, just as Midoriko had instructed. That single bead had rested securely against her breast in an inner pocket of her robes since her departure from the court, a comforting reminder that however far or long this journey might take her she would never be entirely separated from him.

During the day she was steadfast in not allowing herself to think about him or the court. After all, she had left as much to separate herself from him and get control of her feelings as to help the villages. Dwelling on thoughts of him could only serve to undo all of the resolve she had put into her decision to do this. And so she banished him from her mind, focusing instead on what the mission ahead of her would require.

At night, though, under the cover of darkness while the others slept, she allowed herself for just a few hours the comfort of their bond that the nenju offered. Perhaps it was weakness or foolishness on her part, but she could not bring herself to give up the small indulgence. She could not simply forget Inuyasha altogether.

By closing her eyes and focusing her energy into the catalyst of the bead, she could feel through her sixth sense the location of the nenju and its owner. This she did each night before going to sleep.

Kagome found that Midoriko had been both right and wrong about the way in which the sensing happened. Some nights she could only pick up vague feelings and the faintest notion of where Inuyasha actually happened to be at that moment. Other nights it was as clear as if she were simply watching Inuyasha in a vaguely foggy mirror.

She was not certain what the reason was for such a discrepancy in the nenju's power from one instance to the next, but as far as she could guess it was herself. There were certain nights where the need to see him, to be certain that he was safe, was simply stronger than others, and those always seemed to be the nights that she could see most clearly.

On this particular night, her sense of him was hazy at best. He seemed to be alone in his chambers in the Jijūden. Annoyance prickled across her senses, along with the slight weight of fatigue. He was…bent over something? Something to do with the Council, if his feelings were any indication.

Abruptly the vision twisted and spun. He had moved…lying on his back? Kagome felt a moment of disorientation, her vision blurring further with the movement.

Moments passed and some of the annoyance gradually ebbed, a more general listlessness taking its place. This Kagome had felt often from him. She could practically hear him sigh.

Thoughtfulness often seemed to accompany this listlessness, and tonight was no exception. Kagome had long since found that the bond gave her no access to his thoughts. The feelings and sensations that accompanied them were hers to interpret as she could, but any of the conscious goings-on in his head were beyond her reach.

On this night his thoughts seemed to wander somewhere strange, heavy warmth curling out from his stomach through his limbs. Against his lips ghosted the sensation of some remembered softness, and the heat thickened into a warm lethargy that pulsed through his veins. For a fleeting moment, everything was good. She could feel his hand drift up to touch the nenju almost unconsciously.

Abruptly the vision blurred once more and the warmth she had felt boiled heatedly over into anger. He'd lurched upright, bending with pointed determination back over whatever documents he had been poring over. Punishing anger thrummed through him.

"Dammit…"

As he settled back in to focus on the documents, annoyance bubbling over once more alongside the simmering ire, Kagome opened her eyes. Slowly the glow of the fire and the faint outline of her sleeping companions came back into focus.

Sighing softly, Kagome tucked the bead carefully away in the front of her robes. She pulled her knees to her chest, resting her chin atop them and absently watching the flames before her dance as her thoughts wandered. It was always her intent to go right to sleep after ascertaining the hanyou's well-being, but that rarely ever seemed to happen.

Inuyasha was often some variation of annoyed, tense, or angry when she looked in on him through their bond. There was obviously a great deal that he still had to contend with in the court. Reports from Midoriko, reports from Chūsei, walks through the court to address the courtiers, Council meetings, and plans for the upcoming wedding were just a few things that she had managed to catch glimpses of through their bond.

All of this Kagome had known to expect, though expecting it did little towards lessening the niggling sense of guilt that had become a constant in the back of her mind since her departure.

What she had not expected were the moments like the one she had just witnessed. Something was eating at Inuyasha, bothering him far more deeply than any of the matters of the court seemed to. More and more frequently there were moments like the one she had just witnessed.

Kagome could not understand it. She wanted to know what it was that he was struggling with. She wanted to be there and to talk to him and to see him. She wanted to be there as his friend and confidant once more, so much so that it was almost a physical ache at times.

But, no. Kagome closed her eyes, pressing her forehead hard against her knees. No, no, no. That was exactly the path she could not afford to go back down. Physically, at least, Inuyasha was fine, and that was really all she could afford to concern herself with for the time being. She had willingly given over her right to do anything more by leaving the court.

And she could comfort herself with the fact that Kikyou was still there supporting him, albeit that that was a comfort not unmixed with some small twinge of pain. Kikyou had sworn to her that she would take care of Inuyasha, and Kagome knew that the noblewoman was a woman of her word through and through. A number of the nights that Kagome had looked in on him, she had found that Kikyou was with him.

The future Empress would play music or offer counsel on court matters or calmly talk him down when he had worked himself into a real rage. At times she would merely sit quietly in the room with him, making certain that he knew that she was there. Her presence always seemed to dull the edge of his frustrations, though at times a weight of guilt settled in on him during and after her visits that Kagome could not understand.

As far as Kagome could tell, Inuyasha had yet to open up to Kikyou about whatever the thing was that was really bothering him and Kikyou had likewise yet to be open about her feelings as Kagome had advised her to. Still, plans for the wedding were progressing and Kagome could not help but believe that as soon as Kikyou could bring herself to share her feelings Inuyasha would reciprocate. Surely two such good and strong people could not fail to be happy together. And Kikyou would become his constant, the person upon whom Inuyasha could depend within the chaos of the court.

The person Kagome had worked so hard to be for him. The person Kagome was not allowed to be for him.

She hastily swallowed back the bitterness she could feel rising in the back of her throat, tapping her head lightly against her knees in reproach. It was no good to indulge these feelings that sometimes crept up on her in these dark hours of the night. She had made the right choice. She would not dwell on it. She could only move forward now.

Uncurling herself, Kagome moved to slip beneath the warmth of her rough blanket. She needed to stop thinking. Inuyasha was fine and she had a long ride ahead of her in the morning. She closed her eyes, settling in determinedly to sleep.

Yes, it was to be a very long journey indeed.

* * *

True to their estimates, the company reached Kagome's village a week and two days later in the middle of the afternoon. Two youkai mounts bearing riders in the traditional garb of the Tachibana taiji-ya were the first sight that greeted them as they crossed the wide, grassy plain that led into the village.

As they came nearer one of the mounted men raised a hand high, waving it in a sign of friendly greeting. It was Hidehiko, Sango's father.

Sango practically leapt from her mount, running the last several feet to reach her father. He slipped from his own mount, meeting her approach with open arms. He clasped his daughter to himself, embracing her warmly after their separation of several months.

Kohaku sat astride his mount among Kagome’s group, watching the reunion with strangely detached eyes. Hidehiko soon put an end to that, though, dragging him down and proceeding to nearly smother the young man in his embrace.

The company closed the rest of the distance as Hidehiko finished his enthusiastic greetings, Miroku leading the horse that Sango had abandoned in her haste to reach her father. They all dismounted, the members of the Tachibana bowing deeply to their clan head. Kagome and Miroku bowed, as well.

Tachibana Hidehiko beamed at them all, daughter under one arm and son under the other. He cut an imposing figure: tall, hair close-cropped like that of an ascetic rather than a courtier, leanly muscled beneath his close-fitting taiji-ya armor, and sporting a pale scar that stretched from just under his left eyebrow down to the edge of his jaw on the right side. In that moment, though, he looked incredibly gentle.

"My cousins," he said. "Kagome-sama. Houshi-sama. What brings this interesting company so far from the court? Or have you come solely for the sake of doing me the kindness of bringing my dear children to me?"

"We are here on an assignment from the Tennō-sama, chichi-ue," Sango said, pulling free of his embrace to take back the reins of her horse from Miroku. "Kagome-chan is to visit the villages on the Tennō-sama's behalf while we serve as her guard. I had hoped that we might exchange our mounts for some of the youkai mounts you have with you, if you can spare them."

Hidehiko frowned.

"Ah, yes, well, we can certainly spare the mounts, but…" he paused, eyeing the company for a moment. "This sounds like an important assignment, Sango. Are you certain you are prepared to lead Kagome-sama's guard all on your own? I can assign one of the men stationed here to accompany you."

Sango blinked, the bright grin on her face faltering. Her gaze slid to her feet.

"Oh…well, I thought…I mean, I-"

"With all due respect, Tachibana-sama," Miroku said, placing a gentle hand on the noblewoman's shoulder. "I believe Sango-sama is more than capable of leading us. In fact, there is nary a person I know in whose hands I would feel safer."

Sango's head jerked up. She blinked at the houshi, a flush creeping over her cheeks. He offered her a gentle smile in return.

"I feel the same, Tachibana-sama," Kagome put in, unable to suppress a grin as she watched her friends' antics from the corner of her eye. "I have complete faith in the Tennō-sama's appointment of Sango-chan to this mission."

"Of course, of course," Hidehiko said, though the frown still lingered at the corners of his mouth. "I have complete faith in my daughter. I simply thought…Well, never mind. I am proud to hear she has done well so far. And you must all stay at least the night here. You especially, Kagome-sama. You must be eager to see your family, and I wish to show you the progress we have managed to make in this village and the others since last you were here. Would you like us to show you around?"

"I would like that," Kagome said. "Perhaps, though, you might take the rest of the group first, and I can catch you up later."

"Yes, of course. Family first," Hidehiko agreed readily, motioning for the taiji-ya who had been riding with him to take the reins of her mount. "Your lovely mother will be thrilled to see you. She has spoken of nothing but you since first we met. Go see her, and come find us when you can."

She thanked the man, passing him the reins as she dismounted. She bowed to the group, waving as they turned to go off in the direction from which Hidehiko had been coming when they had first spotted him.

Turning, she started off in the direction of her family's hut. She felt her pulse quicken, the corners of her lips quirking up as she unconsciously sped her steps.

Technically it had only been a few months since she had last seen her family, but the last time had been cast under the shadow of such dark circumstances that it was hardly as if she had been there at all. On top of which necessity and a certain hanyou had dictated that her previous stay was a brief one, and she had scarcely gotten a chance to speak with them before having to depart.

On this occasion she had more time to spare and even came bearing good news. She could finally offer the villages the support she had initially gone into the court seeking, thanks to the efforts of herself and Inuyasha. The thought left her elated, her body lighter than it had felt in quite some time.

The hut came suddenly into view. Or at least it seemed sudden, caught up as she'd been in her own thoughts. Kagome paused, surprised at the sight.

Her hut was no longer the hut she had known. Or perhaps the strange thing was that it was no longer a hut at all.

Where once had stood a dilapidated hut, the thatching of the roof thin and prone to leaks and the entryway hanging so threadbare that it hardly served any purpose anymore, there was now a sturdy wooden structure elevated slightly in the style of court buildings. Even the entryway hanging, soft and thick beneath her hand as she moved it aside to enter, was patterned with a scene of a miko performing the ritual prayers at the Chūwain.

Kagome stepped inside quietly, allowing the hanging to fall shut behind her and carefully removing her dirty sandals in consideration of the new wooden floors.

And there she was, sitting atop a cushion and bent determinedly over a piece of needle-work just like a scene out of Kagome's fondest childhood memories. A wave of nostalgia, beautiful and painful, swept through her.

Her mother did not look up, focused as she was on her task of mending what appeared to be a piece of taiji-ya armor, but a welcoming smile turned up the corners of her lips.

"Is that you, Hidehiko-sama?" she called, her deft hands never dropping a stitch. "I'm almost finished. Just give me a few moments more. You must have finished patrol early today. Well, I'll fix us tea in just a moment."

Kagome smiled until her cheeks ached with it, joy at the sound of her mother's familiar voice and the sight of her welling up so thickly that she could not speak.

The hut was not the only thing that had changed since last she had seen it. Her mother fairly glowed in the afternoon light that filtered in past the entryway hanging. Her dark hair, braided and wrapped into a coronet about her head in the practical style of the villages, looked thick and glossy, and the skin visible on her hands and face had a healthy, rosy tint to it beneath her slight tan. She seemed to have gained weight, as well, the haggard thinness of skin that hung too loose on the bone gone entirely.

She looked good, in a way Kagome had not seen her look since her father had passed.

She must have stood silent for too long because her mother's hands slowed in their work, the smile on her face dimming a degree.

"Hidehiko-sama? Is something the matter?" she asked, raising her eyes at last from the work in her lap.

Her mouth fell open, her hands stilling entirely. Chestnut colored eyes, the lines at their corners fainter than Kagome remembered, lit up, a smile stretching impossibly wide across her face.

"Hi, Mama," Kagome said softly. "I'm home."

The armor she had been working so diligently on tumbled from her mother's lap, disregarded, as she rose and rushed to take her daughter into her arms.

"Kagome!" she cried, squeezing her so tightly the girl nearly yelped. "Oh, my little girl! What are you doing here?"

She pulled back to arm's length, her hands coming up to cup Kagome's face as she examined her more closely. Kagome could only smile, laughing softly. Apparently her mother's tendency to fuss had not been altered in the slightest. It was comforting to know.

"Look at you," her mother murmured, pushing a strand of hair back behind her ear. "Look how grown up you look. It's in your eyes, Kagome. You're almost an adult in full now. And you're becoming so beautiful."

Her brow furrowed, her lower lip beginning to tremble slightly as she continued to gaze into her only daughter's face. Kagome's smile did not falter, accustomed to her mother's sometimes mercurial shifts in mood.

"Mama," she said gently, placing her hands over the ones cupping her face. "Mama, don't cry. Come on. Come sit with me and talk."

Her mother swallowed, nodding. She patted her cheeks once before releasing her, turning and going back into the hut to bring out a cushion for Kagome.

"Where are Souta and Jii-chan?" Kagome called after her, seeing no sign of either of them.

"Out helping the taiji-ya," her mother answered, setting the cushion down and gesturing for her to sit. "Or Souta is, at least. You know Jii-chan. He just likes to have ears to chatter at."

"Helping the taiji-ya?" Kagome echoed. "To rebuild villages?"

Her mother nodded.

"They've been helping to supply food to us, meaning the men of the village are free to help them during the day," she said. "We're all eager to pitch in if we can, they've been so good to us since they arrived."

"They were the ones who reconstructed our hut?" Kagome asked.

"It's actually brand new," her mother said. "They tore down our old one and simply started from scratch with the building materials that the Tennō-sama had sent to help fix the other villages in the surrounding area. They did the same with all the huts in the village, helping to patch them up and to rebuild the ones that were destroyed in that attack. They did do a bit extra for us, though. Hidehiko-sama said it was in acknowledgment of the fact that this is your home. They're all very fond of you after what you did for them in the attack."

"Oh," Kagome said, flushing slightly at the praise. "I hardly did much. That was very kind of them, though. It sounds as if things have been going well."

Her mother nodded.

"It took a bit to get everything in place after you left," she said. "And the loss of Kaede-sama was hard on us all. But the Tennō-sama has made good on all of the promises that Miroku-sama made when he asked to take you from us. A spiritualist has been sent to live among us. His name is Yasunori-sama. I'm sure you'll like him. And the taiji-ya have also been serving as guards until they finish the work in the area building the ruined villages back up."

"The taiji-ya have helped us with the problem of the food shortage, as well. By pooling the food supplies of several villages in the area and redistributing according to need, they've made sure we'll all be fine well into the next harvest. Honestly, to hear some of the elders talk after you first left, you'd have thought that becoming connected to the court was the worst possible thing that could happen to us, but the Tennō-sama has been nothing but good and kind to us."

Kagome felt a thrill of pride go through her, but she quickly tucked it away. He was not something she was allowed to think about during the day, even if it was only to be proud of him.

"Then you'll be pleased to hear my reason for coming," Kagome said, reaching into the front of her robes for the small, sealed parchment she kept there. "The Tennō-sama has approved an offer to be made to all of the villages in order to bring them into closer relation with the court. His Majesty is offering them his protection in return for their support. I thought I might bring the offer here first to see how it would be received."

She held the parchment up so that her mother could see the Tennō's seal stamped upon it in wax before opening it up and reading the terms of it to her. She listened attentively, though Kagome was well aware that she likely only understood bits and pieces.

"The Tennō-sama is making that offer to all of the villages?" she said once Kagome had finished, her eyes wide. "That's amazing, Kagome! Just to think how different it would be, all of us being connected to the court. You got his Majesty to do all this, didn't you?"

She turned a proud, knowing smile on her daughter. Kagome flushed, waving a dismissive hand.

"No, Mama," she said. "I encouraged the Tennō-sama, yes, but the decision was all his Majesty's in the end."

"Of course it was," she said, her smile not slipping a notch. "And it was pure coincidence that it all came about only after you went into the court."

Kagome opened her mouth to protest, but stopped short as her mother reached out and took her hands in her own.

"As much as you've grown, it seems you've still some growing to do," she said knowingly, pressing her hands. "I know how hard it was for you when you were little, Kagome. I watched you and worried for you every minute of every day. That power of yours, gift that it is, forced you to take on a lot of responsibility before you even knew what was what. I know how much you held yourself back for the sake of the others, and I'm proud of you for being the kind of person who could do it. Not many can. But I'm afraid in the midst of all that you missed out on something important."

She paused, meeting Kagome's eyes meaningfully.

"It's okay to be happy, Kagome," she said softly. "Maybe I don't know a lot, but I know this much. When you've worked as hard as you have, it's alright to take credit and be proud. It's okay to let yourself be happy. To shut all those feelings up, to deny them for the sake of others like you do, it isn't good, Kagome. Until you can accept yourself, even the parts of yourself that don't seem as good or as useful as others, you will only make it hard for yourself."

Kagome was silent, frowning as she met her mother's earnest gaze. She heard clearly in her mother's words the echo of the words Sango had spoken to her not so long ago. Strange, that she should hear such similar advice from two people so dear to her. She offered her mother a tentative smile, pressing her hands in return.

"I know, Mama," she said. "And thank you for caring enough to say it to me. I'm trying. I just…"

"I know, Kagome," her mother said, sighing softly. "It'll be more difficult for you than most, growing up as you did. As long as you keep trying. And just know that I would never have sent you away…I would never have done it if I didn't think that you would be happy. Somehow, somehow, I know you will be."

Her mother's eyes were fixed on their intertwined hands, the miko's skin now shockingly pale against the tan of her mother's, but Kagome could see clearly enough the weight of guilt that bent her mother's shoulders and furrowed her brow.

"Mama," she said with soft firmness, waiting until her mother raised her eyes. "As much as you know me, I know you. Whatever the village may have received by way of compensation, I know what you chose to do in letting me go was a sacrifice. And I know how much strength that takes. So don't you ever feel guilty for it, because I swear by the kami that I have never and will never blame you for it."

Her mother searched her eyes for a long moment, her mouth opening as if to speak. All that came out, though, was a weighty exhalation, followed by a small, grateful smile.

"Thank you, Kagome."

"Who do you think I learned it all from?" Kagome said, lips quirking up playfully.

Her mother chuckled, patting her hands once before releasing them. Turning, she picked up the armor and thread she had dropped upon Kagome's arrival.

"Well, then," she said, her grin widening. "Just let me finish and then we'll go see all the good my little girl has done for the villages. And maybe we'll see if we can get Jii-chan to stop torturing those poor young men with his stories while we're at it."

Watching her mother resume her work, humming a tune under her breath as she did, Kagome could not help but think that if she could just stay there, in her family's hut by her mother's side, she might be able to forget everything and live content for the rest of her life. It seemed like it had been forever since she had last felt so entirely comfortable.

"Whatever you want, Mama."

* * *

True to her word, it took her mother only a few minutes to finish mending the armor. Afterwards they went in search of Hidehiko and Kagome's companions, finding them after a short search examining the new village temple. Gone was the flimsy, hut-like structure in which Kagome had spent so many hours of her youth training, replaced by a solid wooden structure that vaguely resembled some of the smaller wings of the Chūwain.

Kamo no Yasunori, the new village spiritualist that her mother had mentioned, was also among the group, speaking about the temple and his pleasure at having been assigned to the village. He was a relatively young man, new to the order of growing onmyōji within the court, but he was warm and enthusiastic about his duties. Kagome took an instant liking to the feel of his aura, though the praise he lavished on her upon learning who she was was slightly embarrassing.

Their introduction was not the only one to be made, though. Her mother already knew Hidehiko-she seemed very, very familiar with him, Kagome noted curiously-but she had yet to meet either Sango or Shippou. Kagome made the introductions with a distinct sense of pleasure, never before having thought it possible that all the people she cared so deeply for would meet because of the distinct worlds in which they all lived.

Her mother had already heard a great many favorable things about her best friend from Hidehiko, but even had that not been the case she would have embraced her warmly if only for her relation to Kagome. She fussed equally over Shippou, Kagome's adopted charge, and the kitsune positively glowed beneath the affection she lavished on him. Seeing her mother interact with the child, Kagome was strangely aware of the fact that she was yet a relatively young woman.

If the glance she caught out of the corner of her eye was any indication, Hidehiko's thoughts ran parallel to her own. Kagome stored that thought away to be mulled over at another time.

The taiji-ya of her guard made their own introductions as Kagome was not yet well enough acquainted with them to presume to do so. Once all the formalities of first meeting had been observed, the group resumed their tour of the village, led by Hidehiko and accompanied by Yasunori.

They had stabled the horses they had rode in on in a new make-shift stable built by the taiji-ya which Hidehiko took them back around to for Kagome's benefit. It was a bit less well-constructed than the temple and her family's home, but as it really only served the taiji-ya they had not taken too much time in constructing it. No one in the village was wealthy enough to own and keep a horse, so the structure would likely be broken down when the time came for the taiji-ya to depart.

The work done on the huts was largely as her mother had described. The few that had been destroyed in the attack had been rebuilt as sturdy wooden structures. The huts that had not been destroyed had been refortified, the roofs thatched with new materials and the walls patched. A few huts that had not been destroyed had been rebuilt anyway out of consideration for the exceptionally large families that they housed. Her mother was right, though, in saying that their hut had been given special attention in its design.

The taiji-ya had also taken the time to fell a number of trees that had grown close on the border of the village, both for the sake of harvesting the wood and for the space it provided. In a few months the cleared land could be used to plant more crops.

As they went about they were joined by a number of the villagers who came out to say hello to Hidehiko as they saw him passing and to investigate the unusually large group. They were thrilled to discover Kagome among the group, their attitudes much altered since her last visit in light of all the positive changes that had since been made.

They bowed and praised her endlessly for her great deeds. Kagome was not certain exactly what they had heard, but she felt rather certain from their reactions that it must have been grossly exaggerated. She was at a bit of a loss as to how to respond, having expected to meet with at least some animosity in light of the errand on which she had come and the manner in which she had left the village the last time.

As Yasunori informed her, though, her barrier was holding up magnificently with occasional fortifications on his part, and despite continued restlessness on the part of the wild youkai there had been no harm done to the village whatsoever since she had left. Yasunori had also taken the liberty, he said, of attempting to recreate her technique in creating barriers around the villages that the taiji-ya were in the process of rebuilding, though he demurred that his were nowhere near as powerful as her own.

As the tour and the day wore on more and more of the taiji-ya who were stationed in the villages began to join them, as well, the fading daylight necessitating an end to the day's work of reconstructing the nearby villages.

Souta and Kagome's grandfather returned among them. Kagome was astonished to find how much Souta had grown in such a short period, standing almost as tall as she herself did. Greater access to food had obviously done him well, and in the contented afterglow of a hard day's work well done he looked almost a man. She hugged him so tightly and for so long that he was almost forced to pry her off.

Jii-chan looked much the same as she remembered, though he had the same new glow of health present in many of the faces around her. Having so many new sets of ears to listen to his often nonsensical tales also seemed to have done him well. More introductions were made, and Kagome had the thorough pleasure of having nearly every person in the world for whom she cared all joined together and acquainted.

An impromptu celebration began as their numbers continued to swell with returning taiji-ya and villagers finished with the day's work. Near the center of the village the taiji-ya had constructed a large fire-pit, and the gathering centered around this. The villagers supplied what food they could, and Yasunori even brought out a few of the jugs of sake that he had brought with him from the court.

Instruments such as the shinobue and ōtsuzumi, family heirlooms within the village, were brought out of storage and the dances began around the fire-pit. Children and adults, villagers and courtiers alike, leapt and spun around the flames to the often improvised rhythms of the musicians. Perhaps the songs and the dancers were not elegant, but there was an earnest joy among them that Kagome was certain the court could scarcely match.

Kagome danced with her mother, with her brother, with her grandfather, with Shippou, with Sango, with Miroku, and even with villagers who had been wary of her from the time she was child. She watched Sango and Miroku dance around one another the whole of the celebration, never quite coming close enough to touch. She saw Hidehiko and her mother dancing often together. Even Souta had a young woman from the village that he was never long apart from. The sight of them, the simplicity of it all, caused a twinge in her, but the good cheer of the night was not soon dispelled.

There was one, however, who seemed untouched by the festivities. From the corner of her eye Kagome caught several glimpses of Kohaku, always lurking just on the fringes of the revelry. He put on a smile whenever their eyes happened to meet through the crowd, and Kagome got the odd feeling that perhaps he was watching her. At some point, though, he slipped away and she saw no more of him.

Kagome and her companions had come into the village intending to at least spend one night there, and as the fire began to die out and the celebration slowly began to break up Kagome drifted off with her family to spend the night in their hut. Shippou, asleep in her arms after having somehow gotten into one of the jugs of sake, came with her. Sango, Miroku, and the remainder of her guard went with the taiji-ya to spend the night in one of the several newly built huts designated for their use.

Inside the quiet of their hut, Kagome's mother dug out the extra futon that she had been saving for her daughter since her first departure from the village. Kagome tucked Shippou into it and lay down beside him. The rest of her family brought their futons close to her own, the four of them lying huddled together as they had done so often when she was young. They fell quickly to sleep after the excitement of the evening, and Kagome lay for a long time in the darkness of the hut listening to them breathe all around her.

She took the bead from her robes for only a few moments, probing shallowly into the bond to assure herself that Inuyasha was still well. She felt a brief flash of deep-rooted anger through it, but it seemed nothing beyond Inuyasha's usual ire. The warmth of her family surrounding her on all sides, Kagome did not allow herself to worry over it as long as she might have on other nights.

She slept soundly.

* * *

Despite the late night and the excitement of the previous day, Kagome awoke early the next morning. The gray light of dawn was only just beginning to peek beneath the entryway hanging into the hut, and the others still slept soundly all around her.

For a few minutes Kagome simply tried closing her eyes and going back to sleep. Shippou was warm where he curled against her side beneath the blankets, and the soft breathing of her family lulled her. Try as she might, though, she could not fall fully back asleep.

With some strategic wiggling she managed to disentangle herself from both the kitsune and the futon, slipping out of it. Carefully she stepped over her brother, who slept messily with his arms splayed wide and a trail of drool running down one cheek, and she tiptoed from the hut.

The morning was chilly, but the air was refreshing as she breathed it deep into her lungs. Wrapping her arms about herself to keep warm, Kagome decided to go for a walk around the village to check the different points of the barrier. Not that she doubted Yasunori's work in the least, but going back into the hut would undoubtedly end in her waking someone.

Thus she found herself wandering the perimeter of the village as the gray light of dawn warmed slowly towards the golden light of morning, stopping every now and again to press a hand to certain points in the barrier. It felt slightly strange to her now, infused as it was with Yasunori's energy, but it was strong and still largely composed of her own power. If she concentrated she cold also sense faintly, ever so faintly, Kaede's power left over from the stones she had used to construct it.

The feel of that energy tugged at her heart. For awhile, just to ease the ache of it, she pretended to herself that she was out merely checking the barriers for Kaede, and in an hour or so she would climb the hill to the rickety temple and give her report. And Kaede would be waiting there for her with tea, and she would know nothing of jewels or the court or betrayal. They would simply have tea together.

Unfortunately all of her pretending only deepened the ache, leaving a bitter taste in her mouth.

She wandered towards the small plot of graves on the far edge of the village once she had finished with the barrier. By then people were beginning to emerge from their homes, preparing for the day's work, but she managed to avoid most of them by keeping to the edges of the village.

The plot was relatively small, containing a number of headstones in various shapes and sizes. For the most part they were well kept, regularly washed and attended by living relatives as the rites demanded, but here and there a few had crumbled into disrepair when a person died with no family to succeed them.

There were no actual bodies buried beneath the headstones. The taint of death on the place would have been too great, and her village had long observed the Shintō tradition of cremation to free the spirit from the body upon death. The headstones served primarily as markers in remembrance of the person's life and places for the families to come to pay respects.

Kaede's grave was tucked away in a corner reserved for the village spiritualists. Someone had taken up the care of it, as the stone was clean with small offerings of food sitting before it despite Kaede having no blood relatives within the village. Kagome knelt before it, her eyes tracing slowly over the kanji that formed Kaede's name.

For a moment, staring at the small stone, bitterness rose in her throat like bile to choke her. She had never really had much time to grieve the woman who given her so much of her time and affection. Partly she avoided thinking about, deeply reluctant to acknowledge those last few minutes with her mentor that threatened to taint the entirety of their time together.

She still did not want to think about it. Instead her mind turned in another direction, a thought of a different kind taking hold of her.

What if she had never left Kaede? What if she had never left the village?

The thought struck her with force. Perhaps because she had never truly entertained it before. But it occurred to her suddenly that had she not left Kaede would likely still be alive and she would be safe from the knowledge of her mentor's betrayal. She would be with her family. And she would not be struggling beneath the burden of her own feelings.

Kagome sat there as if frozen, her eyes no longer fixed on the grave marker. She felt suddenly heavy, fixed to the spot as if she would never move again. Dark and awful as she knew her thoughts were, she could not shake them.

"'Kaede'? Is that someone you knew?"

Kagome blinked, the voice drawing her up from the depths of her thoughts. It was most definitely familiar, but so unexpected that she could not place it for a long moment. Slowly she turned around.

"Kouga-sama?"

One corner of the wolf Lord's mouth turned up rakishly, his blue eyes bright in the morning light.

"Hey, Kagome," he said, speaking her name with such genuine joy that she felt her own lips quirk involuntarily upward for a moment. "Miss me?"

"What…?" Kagome began, then stopped and shook her head. "What are you doing here? How in the world did you find me?"

Kouga frowned, having expected a much more enthusiastic welcome. He squatted down on his haunches until his eyes were on level with hers.

"You promised you'd come to me after you left the court," he said lowly. "Remember?"

Of course Kagome remembered. It was difficult to forget a promise of the magnitude she had made to Kouga. However, while the thought had occurred to her upon her departure from the court, she had not had the faintest idea where to go about looking for him. She had been relatively certain that he was no longer in the court, but until the end Inuyasha had never offered her even a hint of what he had done with the wolf Lord.

"I posted a couple of my men around the court after I left," Kouga said. "They saw when you headed out, just like you said you would. Since I've been movin' around since I left, I figured you wouldn't know where to find me. So I had them report back to me when they saw you were on the move. They're not nearly as fast as me, though, so it took me a bit to catch up to you after they finally reached me."

"So Inuyas-I mean, the Tennō-sama…he didn't actually do anything to you?" Kagome asked, confused.

The wolf Lord did not appear to be any the worse for wear. By why would the hanyou have been so cagey with her about it had nothing actually happened?

"The mutt?" Kouga scoffed, tossing his head with as disdainful snort. "Oh, he tried something alright. Morning after we talked I was getting ready to come see you when he barged in and started throwing punches. Not like he was any match for me or anything, but he wrecked the place and told me I was banished from the court and that he'd kill me if he caught me around his servant again. Keh. Like I ever wanted to be stuck in his fucking court."

Kagome blinked at him, her eyes growing wide. Her mouth worked silently for a few moments before she could get beyond her disbelief at Inuyasha's utter thoughtlessness.

"Oh, Kouga-sama, please, the Tennō-sama…his Majesty didn't mean it. His Majesty must have misunderstood something and overreacted," she said, well aware how flimsy the words were even as they left her lips. "You haven't…you won't turn against his Majesty, will you? Please…"

"I was never on that mutt's side," Kouga cut her off, meeting her eye with no trace of his former grin. "And we both know there was no mistake. Mutt's wanted you for his own since I first saw you."

Kagome's stomach sank. Was it too late then? Had Kouga already moved against Inuyasha? He had a sizable clan. What if they were planning to attack the court? What would happen to Inuyasha?

A hand came to rest against her cheek and Kagome nearly flinched in surprise. Kouga, seeing the distress growing across her features, offered her a half-grin.

"I made my deal with you, Kagome," he said. "All the stuff I did, I did it for you, not him. I mighta been pissed off, but I wasn't about to renege on our promise just because dog-shit decided to throw a hissy fit about it. Whatever benefit he might get out of my working to get the youkai to support the court, I'd say I'm getting the better deal here."

His thumb stroked affectionately along her cheekbone and Kagome felt a deep blush warm her face. She felt a twinge of guilt for having doubted him so readily.

"…Thank you, Kouga-sama," she said softly, her eyes falling to the bare earth between them.

"Wait to thank me 'til you've heard what I've done," Kouga said, the cocky grin blooming in full across his face once more. "I had to put a few of 'em in their place when I got back, but I got my clan to agree to throw their weight behind the court. The Eastern Wolf Tribe's yours, along with a few minor youkai clans who live inside my domain. I've been out talking to the Northern and Southern Wolf Tribes, too. Western one was killed off years ago. The Northern and Southern aren't nearly as big as mine, but they're something and they generally bow to my authority. Given time, I think they'll agree to it."

Blinking, Kagome raised astonished eyes to meet his. For a second time she was at a loss, though this was a far more pleasant shock. Kouga's grin stretched wide enough that she could see his fangs, gleaming as they peeked over his lower lip.

"How…in such a short time…?" she asked, an involuntary grin stretching to match his across her face.

"Outside that damn court, I'm a big man, Kagome," Kouga said, without the faintest hint of modesty.

A laugh escaped her. In light of this news, even the wolf Lord's gargantuan ego seemed a bit charming.

"I can't believe you," she murmured. "I really, truly cannot believe you. I mean, it's more than I could have asked for-"

"It's about time for a real reward then, isn't it?"

Before the smile had even fully faded from her lips, the wolf Lord leaned in and pressed his to hers.

The pressure of his lips was insistent, almost forceful, the hand against her cheek cupping more tightly as if to urge her response. Eyes wide, she felt one of his fangs graze her lower lip.

Kagome could not move. The shock of the kiss, though, was less than the shock of the memory that jolted through her. Another kiss, another hand against her cheek, a moonless night, and a deep warmth seeping through her that she did not feel now…

She jerked back. Kouga's eyes slid open, a smirk curling up the corners of his lips. Kagome scowled, jabbing one of her fists into his shoulder as hard as she could manage. He did not so much as blink.

"That was low," she snapped.

"That was just a taste of what's to come," Kouga said unrepentantly. "You're my woman now, remember?"

Kagome's frown deepened, but she was silent. There was little she could say to that or about the kiss, despite her discomfort with both. Essentially that was what she had promised Kouga, however she might resent his pushiness in claiming it from her, and she had promised herself that she would put in the effort with him in order to get rid of her feelings for…

Besides, strangely the kiss had bothered her less than the memory it had stirred. Kagome had diligently avoided thinking about that night-as it had been labeled in her mind-since it had happened. Something, some deep sense of foreboding, crawled across her skin every time any remembrance from that night attempted to surface in her mind. She could feel some thought, some heavy realization, pressing to be acknowledged whenever thoughts of that night asserted themselves.

Kagome scarcely knew what it all meant, but she knew it frightened her. And so she would not think about it.

Abruptly Kagome stood. She frowned down at the still-squatting wolf, crossing her arms over her chest.

"As I recall," she said sternly. "I said I would consider entertaining your attentions, Kouga-sama. Disrespect will certainly not incline me to view your offer with favor."

She started off out of the plot, moving swiftly away from the memories that had been stirred up as much as from the wolf Lord left blinking behind her.

He swiftly caught her up, though, his speed bringing him to her side in an instant. Glancing at him from the corner of her eye, Kagome was slightly irked to find no trace of an apology in his smiling face.

"Still got that fight in you, huh?" he said, a note of pride in his voice as if he himself had done something admirable. "Good. Things'll never get boring that way. Come on. This is your village, right? I wanna meet your clan."

He took hold of her wrist, tugging her forward as if he had any idea where he was going.

Kagome stumbled after him, protesting and wondering exactly what she had gotten herself into with the wolf Lord.

* * *

Thankfully many of the villagers were already out at their work by then, so Kouga's boisterous entry into her village did not cause too much of a stir. Unfortunately there was no deterring him from his determination to meet her family-they, too, were joining his clan, he argued-but Kagome did manage with a series of covert pinches and barely veiled threats to at least keep him from declaring his intent towards her to them.

Her mother greeted him warmly and did not seem to be phased in the least by the fact that he was a youkai or his strange dress. Her brother and grandfather, on the other hand, were wary, sitting largely in stony silence as they sized up the intruder in their home and attempted to puzzle out his relation to Kagome.

It came as a great relief to the harried village girl when Yasunori came to fetch her. She had arranged the previous day to have a meeting with her village's headman to discuss the Tennō's offer of support to the villages. Yasunori, overhearing this, had asked to be allowed to sit in on the meeting in the capacity of the village's new spiritualist. Kagome had readily agreed, hoping that Yasunori's position as a courtier would prove a boon to her in the meeting.

Kagome was torn, though, as to what to do with the wolf Lord. On the one hand having him present at the meeting was undoubtedly a bad idea, but she was not sure if it was a worse idea than leaving him alone with her family to say goodness only knew what.

However, it turned out that her brother and grandfather were leaving to go assist the taiji-ya for the day. Her mother offered to occupy Kouga until she was able to settle things with the headman, and Kagome was left with no choice but to agree despite her wariness of the rather significant glances her mother was continuously shooting her. Leaving Kouga with her mother and Shippou for what would hopefully only be a brief while seemed the least evil of all of her choices.

Resigned to whatever might come of it, Kagome set off with Yasunori to the village headman's hut. It, too, had been redone in the manner of her own family's hut in a show of respect for the headman.

The headman was waiting for them when they arrived, a pot of tea warming over the fire pit. He was an elderly man, one of the oldest and most experienced in their village, though he did not look feeble in the least. Rather he was sturdy like an old oak, all gnarled limbs and scars and lean muscle from years and years of hard work in the village. He greeted them solemnly, though not without a hint of warmth, his eyes dark beneath craggy white brows.

Kaede had essentially been his right hand within the village when she was alive, as was traditional between headmen and spiritualists, and thus Kagome had been familiar with the man since she was young. He had never quite looked young in any way to Kagome, but seemed to have aged greatly since the elder miko's passing.

Yasunori and Kagome both stopped to bow in the entryway before coming to kneel on the cushions laid out for them across from the headman. He nodded in acknowledgment of the gesture, reaching to take the kettle from over the fire and to carefully pour some into a mug set before each cushion.

"Before you begin," said the headman, his back straightening as he turned to face them both. "There is something that I would like to say to you, Miko-sama."

Kagome paused, mug of tea halfway to her lips, at the formal address. She blinked, slowly setting mug back down to give the elder her full attention. When it seemed he wanted some gesture from her to go on, she nodded her head in acknowledgment.

Slowly, positioning his hands at just the perfect angle before him, the headman bowed to her until his bald, weathered head nearly touched the wooden floor. Kagome was vaguely glad that she had not taken that sip of her tea, as she was certain she would have been choking on it.

"For what you have done for this village and my people, I thank you," he said lowly, not rising an inch from his bow. "I know-we all know-what would have become of us had things continued as they were. We could not have survived it. Your sacrifices and efforts on our behalf will never be forgotten, especially in light of the fact that it was all done under no obligation save the prompting of your own conscience. Rightfully it should have been me who stepped up, but I thank you for doing what I could not."

"Oh, no…I-I really…Please, don't bow, I…" Kagome stammered, at a loss.

She shot a pleading glance at Yasunori, but he merely smiled broadly at her and offered a small deferential bow of his own. Thankfully the village headman raised himself back up, his old face cracking in perhaps the first smile she had ever seen from him.

"Needless to say, I'm inclined to follow your judgment on this new offer from the Tennō-sama in light of all that you and his Majesty have already done for us," he said, spreading his hands open before him in a gesture of welcome. "Though I would like to hear the terms."

Hesitating, Kagome merely stared at him for several long moments. Despite the warm welcome she had been given since her arrival, she had not expected it to be anywhere near this easy. Slowly she nodded, recollecting herself and reaching into the front of her robes to pull out the parchment with the imperial seal of the chrysanthemum upon it.

"These are the terms of the new arrangement his Majesty is offering to the villages," she said.

She handed the parchment to Yasunori, aware of his role there as a sort of interpreter in light of the fact that headman could read very few kanji and knew almost nothing of the formality of traditional court language. Yasunori unfolded it, his eyes skimming over the writing there thoughtfully.

"The terms seem reasonable to me," he said after a moment, looking up to meet the headman's gaze. "Mutually beneficial to both the court and the villages. And it does not look as if this village's current arrangement would be too considerably altered."

"Read it to me," said the headman. "I'm not a learned man, but I will try to understand."

Yasunori nodded, bringing the parchment back up to read.

"His Majesty offers tools to be supplied by the court to aid in cultivating each year's harvest, the appointment of a spiritualist to each village requiring one, which would be myself in this case, a supply of weapons and martial training for the men of the village, and guaranteed aid from the court in times of disaster," Yasunori read.

"In return for these guarantees, his Majesty asks for one fourth of every harvest made, to be stored in the court and redistributed among the villages as need dictates, for the military loyalty and support of the men of the villages in times of war or conflict, and for the villages to submit to the authority of a governor appointed to each village by his Majesty to enforce the terms of the agreement."

Kagome's eyes remained trained on the headman while Yasunori read from the parchment, trying to gauge his reaction. He was hard to read, though, his stolid, weathered expression unmoving. As Yasunori finished he was silent, only the crackle of the fire sounding in the room.

"What are your thoughts, Miko-sama?" he said at last, turning to her.

"I think the villages will be sacrificing some of their autonomy," Kagome answered readily, having already looked the offer over several times to familiarize herself with everything. "But in return they will be getting security for themselves. I know the idea of giving up authority entirely to the court might be frightening, but I can assure you that the Tennō-sama is a good man. His Majesty would never abuse any power that you allow him."

The headman nodded slowly, folding his arms as he considered this.

"Then it is decided," he said at last. "I speak for this village in submitting to his Majesty's terms."

"Truly?" Kagome could not keep herself from saying, scarcely able to believe that it was really, truly going to be so simple. Not after her life had been so distinctly un-simple for the past several months in the court.

"Truly," he said, smiling faintly at her tone. "Though I will be depending on you to keep his Majesty in check through all of this."

Kagome smiled, a sound that was half-laugh and half-exhalation escaping her. She nodded readily.

"Of course," she said. "I intend to continue advising the Tennō-sama on the handling of the villages for as long as his Majesty will listen to me."

"Good," said the headman. "Yasunori-sama and I will explain everything to the villagers, as I know you've got to be on your way soon. I doubt there will be much in the way of objection. Is there anything else you need, Miko-sama? Anything the village can offer is yours."

Automatically Kagome's mouth opened to respond in the negative, but she paused. She had been turning over an idea since entering the village and finding it so well off. In light of the easy acceptance of the new terms, it seemed an even better idea than it had before.

"There is one thing," she said after a beat. "I have visited a number of other villages, and I have found that many of them are deeply resistant to the idea of being connected to the court any way. I was thinking that if perhaps I were to have someone from this village accompany me when I go to speak to the other villages they might be more easily persuaded, hearing from someone like themselves who has experienced firsthand what a good thing a connection to the court can be."

"You'd like me to ask one of the villagers to accompany you, then?" he asked.

"If you would," Kagome said. "Anyone who would be willing and able to spare a few months of their time. It would be a great help to me."

"I'll ask around to see who might be willing," the headman said. "As to the governor who's to be installed to enforce the new terms, when should we expect him?"

"When I left I believe his Majesty was going to begin the process of selecting courtiers he believed to be trustworthy enough to hold those positions," Kagome replied. "They will not be installed until after I have returned to the court to report to his Majesty, so it will likely be a matter of months yet."

"Good, then we will have time to prepare for his arrival," Yasunori said, smiling as he refolded the parchment and handed it back to Kagome.

"Or hers," Kagome put in, offering him a smile as she took it back.

Yasunori blinked, surprised. Obviously the thought had not occurred to him.

"Yes, of course," he said, though he sounded a bit uncertain. The headman frowned.

"Well, then," Kagome said, tucking the parchment back safely into her robes. "I thank you both for being so open. Truly you will not regret it. I need to go inform my companions so that we can begin preparing to start out. If you will both excuse me."

She bowed and they both bowed in return, promising to come find her as soon as they could find someone willing and able to accompany the group of their mission. After thanking them both once more, Kagome exited the hut.

For a moment she simply stood there, a chill in the air despite the afternoon sun beaming down on her. She drew in a deep breath. Released it. She smiled, a quiet laugh escaping her.

With a slight bounce in her step, she set off to find Sango and Miroku. One down and the kami only knew how many more to go.

There was something missing, though. Normally after achieving one of these little victories she would go straight away to tell-

Kagome froze mid-step, her mood instantly slipping several notches. She frowned, irritated that the thought had even half-occurred to her.

Biting down on her lip a bit punishingly, she continued much more sedately to find her companions.

* * *

She decided it best to fetch Kouga before going to Miroku and Sango. As her liaison to the youkai clans outside of the court, she thought it important that he be involved in the planning of how they would proceed from here. Also, she did not want him alone with her mother any longer than necessary.

Miraculously he did not seem to have said anything untoward about their relationship to her mother, although the woman even in her infinite graciousness seemed a bit flustered by the wolf Lord's rather large personality. She did, however, shoot Kagome a look that said clearly enough they would be having a discussion later about this second man she had brought into their home. Mentally Kagome sighed.

Shippou decided to stay with her mother who had quickly gained his affections by plying him with attention and food since they had arrived and Kagome led Kouga to the group of new huts that currently housed the taiji-ya who had been staying in the village. As she had expected, they found Miroku and Sango sitting together on a small porch out front of one of the huts, a map between them. They were not speaking, though, and Sango's frame was decidedly tense and she stared unblinkingly down at the map.

They were both visibly surprised at the wolf Lord's arrival. They had been aware of Kagome's acquaintance with him and his presence in the court, but as far as they knew he was close with the Taira and could have no reason for having followed them save an insidious one. Kagome hastily gave them a rather edited explanation of what he had been doing on her behalf with the Taira and what his part was to be in their mission outside the court, carefully skirting around the issue of their exact relation to one another.

Kouga looked rather dissatisfied at this, but satisfied himself instead with slinging a possessive arm around her shoulders. Miroku raised a brow. Sango looked on the verge of protesting, but Kagome merely shook her had wearily at the both of them. She would explain things to them later without the complication of Kouga's presence.

When the awkward greetings were through, they all sat down together around the map. Kagome noticed that Miroku had taken the time to sketch in her village's location on the map which they had brought with them from the court. This was how they planned to keep track of the villages that agreed to join with the court under the Tennō's offer, as well as using it simply to get a better understanding of the land’s lay-out. The cartographers of the court had proved through their maps to be remarkably unconcerned with most of the lands outside of the court, save a few important trade ports and the residences of courtiers.

Kagome explained to the three what had happened in her meeting with the village headman and asked what their opinions were as to how they should proceed. They all considered this for some time before Miroku spoke up.

"Considering the positive response we have received here," he said. "I think it prudent that we visit the surrounding villages in this area to speak to them as well before moving on. With all the help they have been receiving from the taiji-ya, I believe they would likely be just as receptive to the Tennō-sama's terms as your village has been, Kagome-chan."

Kagome nodded.

"That sounds wise," she said. "We had best to do as much as we can in this area before moving on."

"I don't know much about the human villages," Kouga put it. "But if I remember right there's a big kitsune clan that lives around here. They've got minor clans under them all across Japan, so they'd probably be worth talking to."

He pointed to a spot on the map a short way upriver from Kagome's and the other villages.

"Kitsune are notorious for keeping no loyalties save to their own, though," Sango said. "They are tricksters through and through. Do you really think they would be willing to aid his Majesty?"

Kouga shrugged, shaking his head.

"Dunno," he said. "But their clan is one of the big seven outside of the court."

"Big seven?" Kagome echoed. Miroku and Sango turned to him curiously as well.

"The big seven," Kouga said once more, as if the repetition would enlighten them.

After a beat, when they all continued to stare blankly at him, he added, "The big seven are the seven youkai clans who have control of some of the largest territories in Japan outside the court. Most of them are spread out to control different parts of their territory-East clans, West clans, stuff like that-but they're all generally connected to each other. I'm head of the Eastern Wolf Clan, for instance. The Wolf Clan is one of the big seven, divided up into the Eastern, Southern, and Northern Clans. The others are the Kitsune Clan, the Bakeneko Clan, the Ningyō Clan, the Ryū Clan, the Oni Clan, and the Tanuki Clan."

"And are the youkai outside of those clans subject to their authority?" Miroku asked.

Kouga shrugged.

"The seven are usually more interested in themselves than trying to control all the small-fry wandering around out there," he said. "Unless they encroach on our territory or start making trouble for us, they're on their own."

"So these big seven," Kagome said thoughtfully. "These would be the youkai to focus on when looking for support? It sounds as if asking the youkai outside the clans might be an exercise in futility, seeing as they are not bound to any particular region or loyalty."

"Sounds about right," Kouga said, nodding. "Though I can't say how many of the seven you'll be able to convince. They're pretty self-sufficient, so they haven't got a lot of interest in the court. The ningyō are especially hard to get at, since they don't come up onto land much."

"Well, I will depend upon you for whatever aid you can give me in dealing with them," Kagome said. "As to the human villages, I think we will need to employ a similar strategy with them. We can't afford to spend that much time finding and negotiating with every village that might be spread out there across Japan."

"I was thinking the same thing," Sango said. "And I thought it might be wise to go into it as one goes into battle. We need to speak the villages that are, strategically speaking, the most essential."

"And which do you think those are?" Miroku said, turning to her.

"Well," Sango said thoughtfully, her eyes sliding to the map between them.

She traced one slender finger along the length of the eastern coast. Then she pointed to several points on the islands of Kyushu and Hokkaido.

"These areas would be the first line of defense in case of a foreign threat, in addition to containing important trade ports," she said. "Control the coast and you can control what comes in and out."

Next she traced her finger along three large rivers.

"Along these rivers is where we will likely find some of the most fertile lands in the country," she said. "Which will yield the largest harvests and likely contain the largest populations, meaning that they will provide both the greatest amounts of food and the most potential soldiers."

Now she pointed to several of the numerous clan residences scattered across the land, each of them having already been marked by the cartographer who had compiled the map.

"Last would be the villages already attached to residences," she said. "These will be a bit tricky, but I think they are worth going after. A great number of them are exploited by the courtiers whose lands they live on, which is reason enough, but because of that we would also be taking potential soldiers from the personal armies kept by some of the courtiers. And the lands of the courtiers have always been strategically situated for battle, so the villages would offer a number of good offensive and defensive positions."

At last she looked up, some of the certainty fading from her demeanor as she searched their faces.

"Well?" she said after moment, slightly anxious.

"Excellently reasoned, Sango-sama," Miroku said, beaming at her. "And I am in full support of your plan."

An answering smile spread across her face, accompanied by a pleased flush of color. Looking at the two, Kagome knew that this must be the reconciliation of whatever argument they had been having when she had arrived.

"I agree," she added, deeply impressed by her friend's obvious tactical knowledge. "It sounds perfect, Sango-chan. It is a lot of ground to cover, but now that we have the youkai it should be easier. And once we return to the court we can have others sent out to speak to the villages that we cannot get to."

"Then it is settled," said Miroku, nodding decisively. "I believe the youkai are being readied and saddled for us by the taiji-ya right now. You will be accompanying us, will you not, Kouga-sama? Should I call to have a mount arranged for you, as well?"

"Ha," Kouga scoffed, pointing to his fur-clad legs. "Trust me, houshi, I'm the fastest thing around. It'll be a hassle to go slow enough for all of you to keep up, but I wanna stick with Kagome so I'll put up with it."

Miroku's smile faltered slightly, but he nodded.

"Very well, then," he said. "I will go and see to the final preparations. We will meet at the stables at high noon?"

Kagome and Sango nodded. Miroku rose and, with a smile and a bow, left them to go oversee the arrangements. Sango rose, as well.

"I am going to go find my father and my cousins to say farewell," she said. "I will see the both of you in a bit. Please say goodbye to your family for me, too, Kagome-chan."

Kagome nodded in agreement and waved as the woman left them. She folded up the map carefully and tucked it away, intending to return it to Miroku later so that he could continue to sketch in the locations of the villages as they came across them.

She turned to Kouga, frowning slightly. Once again she was not quite certain what to do with him. She wanted to go to say good-bye to her mother, but had no desire to do so with him in tow.

"Kouga-sama…"

The wolf Lord, busily scratching behind one pointed ear, paused and turned to her.

"Huh?"

"I was wondering…" Kagome began tentatively, wincing slightly at his uncouth behavior. "I need to go say good-bye to my mother before we set out. Could you possibly accompany Miroku-sama to help him with the preparations while I do so? I am certain he would appreciate it."

Actually she was quite certain he would not appreciate it in the least. But Miroku's nature was certainly the most easy-going of them all, and he undoubtedly would be able to best tolerate Kouga's presence. Or at least pretend very well to tolerate it. And it would keep Kouga out of trouble for a bit. Kagome wondered vaguely why it felt like she had acquired a second ward to care for instead of a potential suitor.

Kouga looked a bit crestfallen.

"Your mother will be part of my clan soon," he argued, a bit petulantly. "I should come with you."

"I haven't quite explained all that to her yet," Kagome said. "And I would like to do it on my own. That…that's the way humans do it, after all. So, please…"

She shot him a pleading look. He frowned for a long moment, resisting, before his gaze slid away with a faint pout forming around his mouth.

"Fine," he huffed, rolling his eyes. "We'll do it the human way. But at least tell her she'n' your family are welcome to come live with the clan once we're mated. They'll be safer there than here, and I'll make sure my clan knows to treat them good even though they're human. I'm sure they'll like it with us there."

Kagome blinked, her mind jumping back to the first time she had met Kouga. Waking up in the clan's cave, surrounded by wolves and furs and the bones of animals the clan had consumed.

She tried to picture her mother there, busily working the hide of some freshly slaughtered animal into a pelt, or her grandfather, chatting idly with the wolves of the cave. She nearly laughed aloud at the absurdity of it. Kouga, however, looked entirely in earnest. She covered her mouth with a hand, swallowing back her mirth with no small amount of effort.

"I…will be certain to tell her you offered," she said, her voice still a bit thick with it. "Now, you go help Miroku-sama, and I will meet you when it is time to set off."

Kouga nodded, jumping up and tossing her a wave as he started off. A snort of laughter escaped Kagome at last as she watched him go, tail swaying behind him, and she pictured Souta in similar dress with his own faux-tail pinned to the back of his furs.

At the very least life with Kouga would never cease to be interesting.

* * *

Shippou and her mother were out front of her family's hut when Kagome arrived. Shippou was amusing her mother with his transformations, moving from fox to tree to badger to tiger to mushroom in the time it took to blink. His transformations were still a bit clumsy-his bushy little tail was present no matter what form he took- but her mother clapped and praised him wholeheartedly.

The kitsune leapt into her arms as she joined them, pleased to see her without Kouga and eagerly replacing whatever scent the wolf had left on her with his own. Carrying him, she went inside with her mother to sit.

Kagome explained what had happened during her meeting with the headman and the plan they had made for how they were to proceed, apologizing for having to leave so soon. Her mother assured her that it was fine and that she understood how pressing it was that they move quickly, but continued to watch Kagome with a vaguely expectant arch to her brows even after she had finished.

With an internal sigh Kagome realized that she could only dance around the subject for so long.

"About Kouga-sama…" she began reluctantly, busying her hands with stroking Shippou's tail in an attempt at nonchalance. "I hope he didn't give you any trouble. He's a bit…ah, rough around the edges, but he's helped me a great deal since we first met."

"He wasn't any trouble," her mother said reassuringly. "He was certainly…different, but no trouble. In fact I think he was trying very hard to be polite. Very polite."

Kagome did not miss the carefully placed emphasis, but was not at all certain she wanted to address it. She continued to stroke Shippou's tail, her gaze fixed on the furry red appendage. Silence swelled, filling the room.

"I wanted you to come out with it on your own," her mother sighed at last. "But if you won't then I'll just have to ask, Kagome. I won't let you just go off and leave me buzzing with all these questions."

"…What is it you want to know, Mama?" Kagome said, stilling her hands and looking up at her.

"What is he to you?" her mother asked gently. "How do you feel about him?"

Thankfully all of the stroking had put Shippou nearly to sleep in her lap. Kagome watched his lids flutter as he struggled to hold onto consciousness while she considered how to answer.

"I don't know," she said at last, at a loss. "He's…a good man, I think."

"He is," said her mother softly, nodding. "He is also very much in love with you, if I'm not mistaken."

Kagome bit her lip. Though she had hoped otherwise, she had known her mother would not fail to see it.

"You don't feel the same?" her mother asked after a beat of silence.

"I don't know," Kagome said, hands twisting absently in the fabric of her hakama. "I like him well enough. He's made his intentions towards me clear and I'm…I'd like to be able to reciprocate, eventually. I'm trying to give him a chance. Don't you think I should, Mama?"

Her mother was silent for a long moment. Kagome found that she could not lift her gaze to look at her.

"What ever happened to that other young man?" she said at last. "Inuyasha-sama. What happened to Inuyasha-sama?"

Kagome felt her entire body go tense. If there was one thing she had hoped her mother would not bring up…

"Why do you ask that, all of the sudden?" she asked faintly, although she knew well enough.

"I was just recalling how comfortable you seemed to be with him, is all," her mother said, eyeing her intently. "With Kouga-sama you just seem…tense. And Inuyasha-"

"Inuyasha-sama had to stay in the court," Kagome said hurriedly, certain that she did not want to hear whatever was to come out of her mother's mouth next. "And I'm still getting used to Kouga-sama. We haven't spent much time together before this. It's only natural to be a little tense, right?"

Her mother frowned slightly, looking at her for a long moment.

"…I only want you to be happy, Kagome," she sighed at length. "You seemed happy when you were with Inuyasha-sama, despite everything that was going on at the time."

Kagome's hands clenched in her lap. Shippou stirred slightly and she drew a deep breath, trying to relax.

"That's over now. All of it," she said, the words coming out more harshly than she had meant them to. "I mean…don't you think I could be happy with Kouga-sama?"

She hazarded a glance up at her mother. She needed confirmation. Even just the slightest bit of reassurance. Her mother met her gaze, brow furrowed in concern.

"Kagome…" she said, shaking her head. "I'm not certain that feelings work that way. That you can force yourself like that."

Kagome's heart sank into her stomach. Her gaze slid back to her lap.

"I have to try, at least," she murmured. "I don't know what else to do, Mama."

She heard a faint rustling as her mother came to kneel at her side. She wrapped her arm around her shoulders, squeezing her lightly to keep from waking the kitsune in her lap.

"Then try, Kagome," she said softly, leaning down to press a kiss to her temple. "And I'll support you if that's what you need. You're very bright. I know you'll be able to figure it all out, and I trust that you'll make the decisions that are best for you."

Kagome tilted her head back to look up at her. The older woman offered her a gentle smile. Kagome tried to return it.

Her mother had always trusted her. From the time she was very young she had trusted her to make the right decisions and do the right things, all on her own. Kagome had always been grateful for it, the trust and the freedom her mother allowed her.

Right then, though, she felt she might have given anything to just have someone tell her what the right thing was.

* * *

She said her farewell to her mother before setting off, asking her to give her love to Souta and Jii-chan as she did not have enough time to go to them. Before heading to the stables to join her companions, she stopped by the headman's house to inquire about the request she had made earlier.

He informed her that a young man in a family of several brothers both younger and older than himself had eagerly volunteered, and that he had sent him ahead to the stables already. Kagome thanked him and assured him that a governor would be sent along as soon as her mission was completed.

At the stables her companions were already saddling up, along with Kouga and one other new addition. It was a young man Kagome had known from the time she was little. They were nearly the same age and his family's hut was only a short distance from hers. He bowed to her and identified himself as the one who had volunteered to accompany her, though he could not quite meet her eyes.

After a bit of conferring and last minute checking, the entire company was ready to set out. Everyone had their own youkai mount save Kouga, Shippou, and the village boy joining them, whose name was Haru. Shippou rode with Kagome and Haru with Miroku, as he had not the slightest notion of how to ride on his own. Everyone having already said their good-byes, they started out quickly.

Had they left the village a bit earlier they could easily have reached the next closest village before nightfall with their new youkai mounts. As it was night fell shortly before they could reach it and they decided to camp a ways away from the village and wait until morning to approach. They found a small clearing, Miroku set up wards, they unpacked their futons, started a fire, and ate from the food supply the taiji-ya staying in Kagome's village had prepared for them.

Shortly after she finished eating, Kagome sought out Sango. She had been quiet ever since they had set out, and now she sat alone outside of the circle of firelight. Kagome was not sure she had even eaten yet.

"Do you mind if I sit with you, Sango-chan?" she asked softly, gesturing to the futon on which she sat.

Sango hesitated a moment before moving aside, silently making space. Kagome took a seat beside her. She noted where the noblewoman's eyes were fixed, on her brother where he sat eating in the midst of the other taiji-ya.

She sat silent, waiting as unobtrusively as possible. Sango had allowed her to sit down. Surely she would share what was troubling her as soon as she was ready.

Sango's brow furrowed, her gaze falling away from Kohaku and into the leaping flames of their campfire. Kagome could see the flames dancing in the dark of her friend's pupils.

"You saw it, Kagome," Sango said at last, practically spitting the words as if they left a bitter taste in her mouth. "You heard my father. He trained me, but he has no faith in me. He does not think I can do anything on my own. He asked me before I left to consider allowing Kohaku to take point as co-lead with me on the mission as he has been out in the field more. To think, my own younger brother to take my mission from me."

She bit her lower lip, her back rigid with anger.

"Sango-chan..."

"Miroku, too," Sango pressed on hotly. "He keeps trying to convince me that my father must have meant for Kohaku to learn from me, not to take over the mission, but really he doesn't think I can do it on my own either! He must think me unfeminine for even wanting to-"

"Sango-chan," Kagome interrupted with gentle firmness, placing a hand on her friend's shoulder. 

Sango paused, though anger still drew her features tight as she turned to look at her friend. Kagome's hand slid from her shoulder to take one of her clenched hands, pressing it until her grip relaxed a bit. She was slightly surprised. She had never seen her friend look quite so openly frustrated.

"Perhaps," she said slowly, thoughtfully, as she met her friend's dark gaze. "Perhaps your father…does not believe in you. Perhaps he does not think you capable of this."

Sango's expression fell almost in an instant, as if hearing it confirmed had drained all the fight from her. Kagome's heart twisted. She squeezed her friend's hand.

"But good people can get stuck in backwards notions the same as anyone," she pressed on. "And even from just the few times I have spoken with your father, I know a good part of it is simply worry for his daughter's safety, however misguided it might be. If there's one thing I've learned from my time in the court, it's that people don't change quickly or easily, but that they can change. If you want your father to change, or your clan to change, then you have to give them a reason to."

Sango blinked, some of the hurt slowly fading from her expression. Her glaze slid from Kagome's face down to their intertwined hands.

"You're right," she said softly. "I know you're right. I just…I feel frustrated. This…being out in the field, fighting and leading missions and protecting people…I have wanted to do this, truly do this, as far back as I can remember. And now that I am trying, the thought that even my own family will not support me…"

"Just give them time, Sango-chan," Kagome said gently, offering her friend an encouraging smile. "They obviously love you. Given time they will see that this is what makes you happy, and moreover it's what you're good at. And you know Miroku-sama and I are behind you whenever you need us."

Sango cast a guilty glance at the houshi where he sat amidst the group of taiji-ya across the fire from them. He appeared to be chatting amicably with Noriko about something, his usual polite smile firmly in place. Sango's expression soured slightly, her lips pursing at the sight.

"Perhaps…perhaps he has been trying to support me," she said grudgingly. "But he must think me unfeminine. I mean, I have been trying…"

She trailed off, her flush apparent in the light the fire cast across her cheeks. A frown tugged at her lips as she watched Miroku lean towards Noriko, gesticulating widely as he explained something to her. Kagome frowned, as well. It did not particularly appear to her as if Miroku was flirting with the woman any more than he flirted with any other woman, but his behavior was difficult to understand.

Knowing as she did how he felt about Sango, she would have expected him to eagerly reciprocate at any sign that the noblewoman might share his feelings. And Sango had certainly been making an effort since they had started out from the court. She always made a point of riding beside him, she consulted with him often, and Kagome had even overheard her telling him none-too-subtly that she had no qualms about marrying beneath her station if her feelings inclined her towards it. Sango was trying, and it was hard to miss her meaning.

But for all of her efforts, Miroku seemed unaffected. If anything he had only become more actively flirtatious with all of the women, including but not limited to Sango. Kagome had no idea what to make of it and no idea how to go about asking him what was going on without exposing her knowledge of both his and Sango's feelings.

"I don't think he thinks you unfeminine," she said at last. "Perhaps he simply hasn't noticed your efforts. Miroku-sama seldom takes things very seriously. Perhaps you need to be more straightforward with him. To simply come out and tell him how you feel."

"And if he does think me unfeminine?" Sango pressed, her eyes searching as she turned them back to her friend. "If he thinks that I am unmarriageable because I have chosen this path?"

Kagome's frown deepened, her eyes falling to the futon beneath them. She knew the answer to that better than she would have liked. The circumstances were different, but the problem was the same.

"As far as I can tell, life is…a series of choices that are put before us," Kagome said softly. "And choosing one thing generally means giving up something else. If he truly does feel that way, then I suppose the question becomes…how much would you give up for him?"

"Not this," Sango said softly, immediately. "I…I can see myself sacrificing a great many things for his sake. Not this, though. Not for anyone. Some things are too important."

Kagome offered her friend a weak smile.

"I understand."

"It would be nice if things were simple, wouldn't it?" Sango murmured, shooting one last glance at the houshi before turning back to Kagome. "I think I need to go apologize to Kohaku. I have been awful to him since we set out, and the kami know he means no harm."

"By all means," Kagome said, gesturing for her to go on.

Sango nodded, rising to stand. She shot Kagome a small, grateful smile.

"Thank you," she said.

Kagome shook her head.

"You are doing just fine, Sango-chan," she said. "You simply need someone to remind you every now and again."

Sango's smile widened, and she turned to go. She only made it two steps, though, before she turned back with a sudden frown.

"Do not think this means you have gotten out of explaining you-know-who to me," she said, darting a meaningful glance at the wolf Lord where he rested propped against a tree on the fringe of the camp. "I will get every last detail about that out of you, do you hear me?"

Kagome grimaced to herself as she watched Sango go to her brother. That was one conversation with her friend that she did not look forward to.

She watched for a time as Sango spoke to her brother. The conversation seemed to go well, though Kagome was finding more and more that Kohaku was difficult to read. Slowly the others began to disperse to their own individual futons to lie down. Kouga had refused the use of one, propping himself up against the trunk of a tree and quickly dozing off instead. Kagome moved to her own futon, where Shippou already lay snoring softly. She waited until most of the others appeared to be asleep before pulling the bead from her robes.

The connection was unusually clear that night. Inuyasha came immediately into focus, only his outline vaguely blurred.

Despite the late hour, he was not inside his chambers. No, he appeared to be near a pond somewhere…it looked vaguely familiar…

Suddenly the image clicked into place in her memory. He sat atop the same small hillock in his private gardens that they had sat atop together numerous times while conferring on court matters or having etiquette lessons, looking out over the same vast, dark pond. Misery sat like a weight in the hanyou's stomach, fixing him to that spot.

A crunch resounded in the silence of that place and Inuyasha swung to face it, blurring Kagome's vision for a moment as his hand moved instinctively to the hilt of the sword at his waist. She felt Inuyasha relax slightly before her vision refocused, his hand falling away from the sword.

Standing at the foot of the slight slope, the pale hue of her skin bright in the faint light of the moon, was Kikyou. A twig had snapped beneath her geta, and she gazed up at him with a look as close to sheepish as Kagome had ever seen her come.

"Kikyou," he said, and Kagome was surprised at the slight reluctance that welled up in him. "What're you doing out here?"

"I had intended to ask the same of you, my Lord," she said softly, ascending the slope. "I went to your chambers and found you missing. Why come out here when the evening is so cold?"

Despite the chill she knelt down to sit beside him, arranging the layers of her juni-hito carefully about her on the frozen ground. Instinctively Inuyasha shrugged his haori off, leaning over to drape it across her shoulders. Kikyou offered him a small smile, reaching up to tuck the haori more closely about her.

"I was sick of being holed up in there with all that fucking paperwork," he said by way of answer, turning to look out over the pond once more, "You should go back inside. You'll get sick."

He wanted to be alone with his misery, Kagome sensed. Kikyou, however, did not move, and Inuyasha could feel her eyes on him. He shifted, uncomfortable.

"Are you still having difficulty shifting the funds for the villages, my Lord?" Kikyou inquired after a moment.

"Uh," Inuyasha grunted in assent, annoyance prickling through him at the mere mention. "I've been tryin' to bargain with the Council, but there's only so much they'll let me access from the court treasury without knowing what I wanna do with it. Greedy bastards."

"Patience is key, my Lord," Kikyou returned calmly. "With time you will wear them down, I am certain. Besides…Kagome would be proud of all of the effort you have been putting in, I think."

Inuyasha tensed. He often tensed at the mention of her name, Kagome noted vaguely. She was more curious at the future Empress's rather pointed mention of her name.

Silence stretched for a few long moments. Kikyou's hand, her skin cool to the touch, came to rest gently atop Inuyasha's. He tensed further, but slowly wrapped his hand around hers in turn.

"You have looked unhappy since she left," Kikyou said at last, her voice slightly strained as she gripped his hand more tightly. "Do you…do you really regret allowing her to leave that much?"

"Kikyou…"

Guilt welled in him like bile, burning and acidic. He made as if to pull his hand away, but she held him fast. Her gaze was fixed out on the pond, but her dark eyes burned bright with some internal flame.

"I know how much you depended upon her," she pressed on, her voice soft but clear. "I know that the two of you became close after all that you suffered through together. I know that you confided in her and that you-"

"Kikyou, stop."

One tug brought her to him, whatever she might have said next lost as she came to rest against his chest. Inuyasha did not want to hear anymore. He would not hear anymore. He could feel her trembling slightly against him, and sharp pain mingled with the burning guilt. He held her more closely.

Kagome wanted to look away. She knew he was in no danger, and that was all she really needed to know. But she wouldn't stop. She couldn't. She needed to see this. She needed the image of the two of them burned so deeply into her mind that she would never forget it. Otherwise she would never get past this.

"Just…just quit it, Kikyou," he murmured lowly, shaking his head. "None of that matters anymore. I chose you, didn't I? Years ago I told you I wouldn't leave you alone. That I'd take care of you for as long as you needed me. So just stop, alright?"

"I know that," said Kikyou softly, her hands curling in the fabric of his juban. "Of course I know that. And I know that you would never break your word to anyone. I just…I worry sometimes that…that your word is the only thing…"

Her words tapered off into silence, as if she could not quite bring herself to finish. Instead her eyes slid shut, and she leaned slowly forward until her head rested against his chest. She drew a scarcely audible, shaky breath, clinging to him as a small child might, and a protectiveness and sympathy that bordered on painful welled and mingled within the hanyou. He brought a clawed hand up to rest gently atop her head.

"I'm here, aren't I?" he said, a low edge to his voice. "That's not gonna change, Kikyou, so quit worryin' about stupid shit. You and me…we're the same. So I understand, okay? I won't let you be alone."

Kikyou drew another small, shaky breath, the sound slightly muffled against Inuyasha's chest. Pain and guilt ate at him.

"I'm sorry, Kikyou," he muttered. "I'm sorry. I didn't…I didn't want you to think…"

"Don't apologize, Inuyasha," Kikyou murmured. "It is not like you, and it makes me think you have done something wrong."

Inuyasha was silent, grimacing. He certainly felt as if he had done something wrong. Resolve, though, was slowly creeping in at the feel of her small against him, mixed with nostalgia as it rose to wall over his guilt.

"I'm gonna take care of you, Kikyou," he murmured, his voice low and feeling. "I swear I won't let you get hurt anymore."

Kikyou pulled back slightly, dark eyes wide as she raised them to search his face. She looked for several long moments, something almost desperately expectant in her face. Inuyasha met her look in silence, uncertain.

"What?" he said at length when the silence grew too protracted.

Kikyou blinked, her eyes falling away from his face. A slight frown edged her lips, but she shook her head. She leaned back in, pressing close to his warmth once more.

"Nothing," she murmured softly, a fleeting note of disappointment in the word. "It is nothing. Just stay with me. I do not need anything else. I don't need…"

He nodded slightly, resolve firm as he tucked her carefully back against his chest. And in that moment, as they sat entwined atop that hillock where Kagome had once passed so many happy hours with the hanyou, she knew with awful certainty that for as long as Kikyou asked it, Inuyasha would not leave her. No matter what.

"Kagome."

She blinked, dazed for a moment at the feeling of just having been drawn up from the depths of an awful dream. As her vision slowly refocused, she saw Kouga squatting just before her where she sat on her futon. Behind him the fire had burned low, and she wondered dazedly how much time had passed.

"You're crying," he said, the concern in his features obvious even in the near-dark in which their silent campsite was now enveloped.

He reached out a hand, the tip of one clawed thumb swiping just beneath her eye. Kagome was surprised to feel the dampness there and to see the glimmer of it on the tip of his finger in the faint light of the stars.

"What's wrong?"

Kagome reached up, gingerly touching her damp cheeks. She swiped at them, the suffocating tightness in her chest warming slowly into anger.

"Nothing," she bit out, her voice hoarse. "Nothing is wrong."

And nothing was wrong. It was all exactly as she'd wanted it. It was exactly what she'd hoped for.

She bit her lip, feeling as if she might choke on the acrid bitterness that seemed to be welling up from the very depths of her. She was afraid if she opened her mouth she might scream.

Kouga's arms, warm despite the deep chill of the night, wrapped around her. A shudder ran the length of her, and Kagome inhaled tremulously.

"Nothing's wrong," she murmured against his shoulder, swallowing back the feeling fiercely. "Nothing's wrong. This is…this is what I wanted..."

"Kagome," Kouga said lowly. "I dunno what's going on, but any idiot knows a wound doesn't go away just because you say it's not there. Just get it out, okay? I'm here."

His words echoed the hanyou's too closely. A soft sob escaped her before she could stifle it. Another followed it, and another, until she found that she could not stop. She pressed her face tightly against his shoulder, more than a month's worth of doggedly suppressed feeling overwhelming her.

"Why does it have to be like this?" she murmured, the words spilling from her more quickly than she could process them. "I don't…I don't want to resent them. I don't want to feel like this anymore…Why can't I just stop? I've been trying so hard, to forget and to not care and to get past it…Why won't it just go away?"

"Kagome…"

She could not see the way that his face fell, but she felt it as his arms tightened around her. And she cried harder, because the arms around her were not the arms she wanted. Because she was terrified that that would never change, no matter what.

"I just want to do what I have to do," she said. "And I want him to be happy. I want everyone to be happy. I don't want this anymore."

Kouga said nothing, but continued to hold her until the last embers from the fire died out and left them in the dark.

* * *

There was a certain amount of relief that came of having cried over it all after more than a month of forcing it back, but Kagome was not able to easily dismiss the hopelessness that came with that night. The thought that all her efforts might never be able to get her beyond her feelings for Inuyasha, that she might become useless and bitter because of them, stuck fast in the back of her mind.

Nor could she control her other thoughts very well any longer. Before she had been at least able to confine thoughts of the court and Inuyasha to the night, but the dam seemed to have been broken beyond repair. Thoughts of him, of Kikyou, of the court, and of what her future was to be if she could not change things assailed her by turns, sometimes occupying her for long stretches at a time as they rode.

Kouga, too, became slightly subdued after that night. Though for him that really only meant that he occasionally spent a stretch of several minutes in silence. He still stuck fairly closely to Kagome's side as they travelled, but some of the boldness had gone out of the advances he made towards her. At times he looked almost uncertain as he gazed at her.

She grew more comfortable with him as they continued to travel, perhaps in part because his advances lost some of their aggression. Despite his complaints about the slowness of their pace, he was a great help to the group in hunting for meals and scouting ahead for campsites. He made a visible effort to be kind-or at least inoffensive-to her friends, though Shippou persisted in his staunch dislike of the wolf Lord, and they spoke often together as they rode to pass the time. She came to count him among her friends.

It took the group a little over a week to visit all the villages near to Kagome's own, following the river northward to reach them. There were six all told that had been destroyed in attacks by roaming youkai swarms, though the taiji-ya had made good progress in restoring many of them. The scattered inhabitants were slowly returning to their former lives, aided by supplies from the court and protection from the taiji-ya of Sango's clan as well as men from Kagome's own village.

As Miroku had guessed, it took very little in the way of persuasion for Kagome to get them to agree to the Tennō's terms. Kagome's personal part in having requested the supplies that they were receiving to aid them in restoring their lives after the devastation of the attacks was not unknown to them, and for most it was more than enough reason to agree. For the elders of the villages who were yet skeptical of the court after its long negligence of the villages, Haru was there to supply testimony as to how beneficial a solid connection to the court could be. In the end all six villages agreed, and Miroku recorded them on the map to present to the Tennō upon their return.

Once the villages were secured, they continued up along the river towards the spot where Kouga thought the Northern Kitsune Clan to be. He had only ever been there once, though, and the place was shrouded in illusions at all times, so it was difficult for him to say exactly how long it would take to reach it or where exactly it was. The group resolved themselves to simply continuing north along the river until they ran into the clan's dwelling.

On the second night after they had left the villages behind, they set up camp in a small clearing Kouga had discovered near the river. Kouga himself had gone out hunting, promising to catch a few rabbits for that night's dinner. Noriko and Tomiko sat together to Kagome's left, debating some point about the nature of kitsune as they worked to start the fire. Noriko seemed to think that they were capable of reading humans who left themselves open, while Tomiko argued that that was simply a child's tale often passed around among the taiji-ya for amusement. Kagome, though only half-listening to the conversation, was inclined to agree with the latter.

Shippou was across from her, listening avidly to some tale one of the men of the taiji-ya was telling. Haru, sitting just beside the small kitsune, wore a look of almost equal wonder as he listened. He had been exposed to a great many new things since joining the group, never before having travelled outside of the village, and Kagome often wondered if she had looked quite so wide-eyed when she had first set out.

Miroku was busy setting the wards for the camp, walking a broad perimeter around it as he threaded his rosary through his fingers bead by bead and chanted lowly one of the sutras for protection. Sango was a short distance to Kagome's right, the map open on her lap as she studied various routes and marked the progress they had made in that day's riding.

Kagome sat alone near the edge of the camp. Thoughts of Inuyasha and the court had plagued her during most of the ride that day despite her best attempts to keep them at bay, and now she found that she simply did not have the energy to interact with anyone. She felt heavy, and she simply wanted to sit for awhile.

Absently she fingered the bead nestled safely in the inner front pocket of her robes as she sat. The bead she had not dared to use since that night. She was not sure at this point, though, what was more difficult: seeing him or not seeing him. Neither seemed to offer her much comfort. She wondered if perhaps tonight she should hazard a look just to check in on him.

Something moved in the corner of her vision. Kagome glanced up, momentarily distracted.

She just managed to catch a glimpse of Kohaku as he disappeared into the dense tangle of trees that bordered their campsite on the right side. No one else seemed to notice as he slipped off.

Kagome frowned. Several times since they had started out from her village she had seen him do the same thing. He would simply slip off without a word to anyone. Usually she dismissed it as the boy simply needing to relieve himself, as he never took particularly long in returning, but there was something about the furtiveness of his movements…

Before she could really think it through, Kagome was on her feet. Perhaps it was merely that she needed a distraction, but she found herself trailing after Sango’s brother, determined to at least rid herself of the strange wariness she often found herself feeling towards him.

It was deeply dark beneath the canopy of the trees, the branches so close together that even the light of the moon could only penetrate in small patches here and there. Kohaku was nowhere to be seen, and Kagome wondered how far in he had dared to wander on his own. For a moment she considered turning back, feeling a bit foolish for even contemplating following, but after a moment she pressed on, telling herself that she might just as well go through with it now that she had started.

She walked for several minutes, deeper and deeper into the trees, but still there was no sign of Kohaku. It seemed absurd that he would have gone so far simply to relieve himself, especially considering that it seemed to get darker with every step she took.

A chill rolled down the length of her spine, and Kagome paused mid-step. There seemed to be some sort of fog looming just before her. It was difficult to tell in the gloom beneath the trees, but the mist roiling around and distorting the trunks of trees was faintly visible in the patches of moonlight that managed to pierce through.

Kagome tensed. She could sense youki in the strange mist, rolling so thickly through it that it nearly clouded her sixth sense entirely. Instinctively she reached back, pulling her bow from the quiver slung over her shoulder. Her eyes scanned the mist for any sign of movement, her pulse beginning to thrum lowly in her ears.

"Kohaku-kun?" she called, suddenly concerned for what might have happened to the boy. "Kohaku-kun? Can you hear me?"

Movement to her left, just inside the mist. Kagome swung to face it, leveling her bow and notching an arrow in one practiced motion.

"Show yourself," she called, frustrated at the way the mist was clouding her spiritual sense. "Quickly, or I will shoot."

The figure, its outline too tall for it to be Kohaku, moved slowly forward. Kagome's eyes narrowed as she tried to get a good look at it through the mist, her entire body tense. It moved at last into a patch of moonlight, half of its face illuminated.

Kagome froze. Her bow and arrow slipped from her hands, falling soundlessly to the forest floor.

"Inuyasha."


	23. Of Clans and Curses Part I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our mini-history lesson for today:
> 
> -a few notes on kitsune: You already know most of the necessaries about what they are, but here are a few more facts for your reference. They are tricksters above all else, according to Japanese mythology. However, the longer a kitsune lives, the more tails it grows and the more wisdom it gains. They can grow up to nine tails, and a kitsune who gains that many is eligible to become a servant to the kami.
> 
> -a few notes on weddings: Heian weddings are…not like any sort of Western wedding ceremony that you might think of, to say the least. No ceremony occurred per se that made a couple 'married', save a little ritual where a man spent three nights…*ahem* having a sleepover with the woman of his choosing. If, on the third night, he remained in the woman's home until morning, then they were married.
> 
> This is all just to say, however, that I will be going with a more modern version of the wedding found in Japanese culture, with an official ceremony and people in attendance at the event. Mostly just because I'm more familiar with it, but I wanted to note the divergence.
> 
> *Special note: There's a hint of the beginning of a common Japanese folk tale in this chapter. I would tell you what it is, but I would be giving something important away.

She couldn't move.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome breathed again, hardly daring to trust her own eyes. "How-?"

She cut herself off, simply taking him in for a long moment. His long silver hair was luminous in the shaft of moonlight that slanted across his face, his unnaturally golden eyes bright with some internal light of their own. His sharply angled features were solemn as he peered out at her.

The sight of him, so familiar even after their long separation, made her chest ache. She swallowed past the knot rising in her throat, drawing a shaky breath.

"Inuyasha," she said again, amazed at the thrill simply speaking his name after having held it back for so long sent through her. "What…what are you doing here?"

His gaze fell to the forest floor between them, his shoulders tense.

"I couldn't do it," he said, so lowly she had to strain to catch the words. "I tried, but…I promised to protect you, Kagome. I can't just leave you alone."

Kagome blinked, feeling her heart stutter in her chest before speeding up to echo loudly in her ears. She felt as if she could not draw enough breath to fill her lungs.

"But…the court," she faltered. "I mean, how…what about-?"

He raised his eyes to meet hers, a softness in them that she had only seen a handful of times before.

"It doesn't matter," he said. "None of it matters anymore. I'm here. This is what I decided, Kagome. Just…just c'mere, alright?"

He gestured to her. Kagome found herself moving almost involuntarily, everything inside her seeming to strain towards him. She stopped a few feet from him, though, a moment of hesitation catching and holding her.

"But…Kikyou-sama?" she said, the words scarcely above a whisper. "I mean, she…"

He frowned, shaking his head insistently.

"That's not important," he said, meeting her eyes intently. "None of it matters right now. I chose you, Kagome. Just…just c'mere, alright?"

He gestured to her once more. Kagome looked at him for a long moment, feeling a deep tremor pass through her entire frame.

She moved forward, stopping only a foot from him and looking searchingly up into his face.

"…What are you?" she said softly.

Inuyasha blinked, his brow furrowing.

"What are you talking about, idiot?" he said. "I'm-"

"You're not!" Kagome snapped, fists clenching at her sides. "Don't you dare even speak his name! Inuyasha would never…he wouldn't just abandon everything on a whim. Not now. And he would never…he would never speak that way about Kikyou-sama, so tell me what you are!"

She raised a hand, glowing with the light of her spiritual energy, and held it before the thing. The confusion slipped slowly from its expression, sliding into empty neutrality. In the light of her spiritual energy Inuyasha's image seemed to become translucent, blurring around the edges.

The thing wearing Inuyasha's likeness shrugged.

"I'm what you want me to be," it said. "Or at least, I would've been. Too bad. It looks like you could use a nice illusion."

The hanyou's image blurred further. Mist swirled up around it, tugging and pulling at the thing until it was nothing more than mist itself.

Kagome stood for a long moment, staring into the spot where the thing had been. The light faded slowly from her hand and she bit her lip, uncertain if she was going to cry or yell.

"Kagome-sama?"

She jumped, startled at the sound.

Kohaku stood several feet behind her, though his form was obscured by the darkness beneath the trees. He frowned at her.

"What are you doing out here all alone, Kagome-sama?" he asked.

He stooped to pick up the bow and arrow she had dropped, moving forward to hand them to her. Kagome took them from him, murmuring her thanks without meeting his gaze. She wasn't certain she could control her expression at the moment, and it was slightly embarrassing to think that she had intended to follow him out here in the first place.

She glanced over her shoulder back into the roiling mist.

"I think I just found the Northern Kitsune Clan."

* * *

Kohaku escorted her back to the camp in silence. Kagome could not muster the energy to offer him much of an explanation, still shaken from the encounter.

Back in camp she roused those of her companions who had begun to settle in for the night, calling for them to gather around the fire. Kouga returned to the camp shortly after her, dropping his kill and coming to join the group.

Kagome explained to them what she had found, recounting the illusionary properties of the mist while glossing over what exactly they had shown to her. Kitsune, she explained, were the only ones with youki capable of weaving such an elaborate illusion, and only a great number of kitsune working together would have been able to create something as powerful as what she had sensed.

Thus she assumed that the illusionary mist acted as a barrier, concealing the lands of the Northern Kitsune Clan. Judging by the way the illusion had attempted to draw her into the mist itself, the barrier functioned by luring people in and keeping them bound in the illusion, thus diverting them from wherever the kitsune clan itself was located. By nature kitsune were not fighters, but through illusions and tricks they managed to protect themselves very well.

The group agreed that it would be wise to wait until morning to attempt to enter their lands as illusions were always more powerful at night than in the light of day and they set to cleaning and cooking the rabbits Kouga had caught.

Kagome, finding that she was not particularly hungry, retreated to her futon to think. For all that they had found the kitsune clan's land, she was not at all sure how they would manage to enter. She needed to find a way to keep them all from being sucked into the powerful illusions.

The easiest way, she knew, would be to simply pierce the barrier using hers and Miroku's spiritual abilities, but she quickly ruled that idea out. Forcefully piercing the barrier they relied on for protection would put the kitsune on the defensive, and that was hardly any way to go about asking them for their support of the Tennō. No, it would have to be something relatively unobtrusive.

Kouga interrupted her line of thought, though, when he approached to try to get her to eat some of what he had caught. Kagome appreciated the gesture, but had to refuse several times before he would let her be.

Exhausted and irritated for reasons she did not care to examine, she decided after the interruption to lie down and save her planning for the morning. She fell asleep slowly, her hand moving unconsciously to clutch at the mala bead hidden in the front of her robes.

* * *

"You are certain of what you saw?"

"Yes, Naraku-sama," a voice answered, not the slightest inflection present in the words.

"Good," the first voice returned, satisfaction curling darkly around the word. " Remember, there is nothing pure in this world, not even the kami themselves. Sooner or later everything falls into decay. Now it is only a matter of time."

"Yes, Naraku-sama. Your orders?"

"Continue as you are, and report anything of interest to me immediately," the man ordered. "I will alert you when it is time. Maintain your distance, as well. Do not risk provoking it to defend itself once more."

"As you wish, Naraku-sama," the second voice replied, still entirely toneless.

"…Pathetic creature," the man sighed, a sneering edge to the words. "Do not worry. Your purpose is almost served, and I will be certain to put you out of your misery when the time comes. Be grateful. It is more mercy than I intend to show in the time to come."

"…Yes, Naraku-sama."

* * *

They waited until high noon the following day to set out, Miroku pointing out that the illusions would be weakest when the sun reached its zenith. After conferring for some time, Kagome and Miroku also decided that going in blind would be best. It was a risk, of course, but the appeal of the illusion was largely visual. If they could all block that out temporarily, they had a much better chance of getting past the mist barrier and into the kitsune clan's land without upsetting the kitsune themselves.

Sango was reluctant to agree to the plan, realizing how vulnerable it might potentially leave them all. Kouga pointed out, though, that he would be more than able to compensate for their lack of sight. His daytime vision was poor to begin with, meaning he relied heavily on scent and auditory cues while the sun was out. As long as they all remained together, he would likely be able to navigate them through. At length Sango agreed and the group set out.

They left their youkai mounts behind at the campsite, knowing they would prove too large a complication to their plan. They were well-trained enough to remain where they were told to and more than intimidating enough to put off any would-be thieves. With any luck they would be able to get through the negotiations with the Northern Kitsune Clan quickly and return before too much time had passed.

Kagome led the group into the woods, stopping them when she sensed the youki of the barrier just beyond the next line of trees. The group arranged themselves into an extended chain before tying on their makeshift blindfolds, insurance against any temptation they might experience to open their eyes.

Kouga and Kagome at the head with Shippou perched firmly on her shoulder, the group linked hands and started forward. Kagome felt more than slightly foolish at first, imagining the sight the lot of them must make, but her embarrassment was quickly driven out by the chorus of voices that rose up as they neared the barrier.

They seemed to be everywhere, calling to her, to her companions. Beside her she felt Miroku stiffen, some male voice she could not place calling his name insistently above even the noise of the other voices. His hand tightened around hers, and Kagome made sure to hold him securely in return as she felt the youki of the barrier begin to swirl around her.

"Do not listen!" Miroku called as they moved slowly forward, his voice rougher than she had ever heard it before. "Remember that it is an illusion! Whatever you are hearing…whatever it is, it is all lies!"

Just behind him Sango took up the cry, more to drown out the clamor of the voices pressing in on them from all sides in the mist than in the hopes of actually being heard. Soon the entire group was yelling, some of them nonsensically, to keep the relentless press of the voices at bay.

Kagome could have sworn she felt hands ghosting over her flesh, tugging at her clothes and hair as voices both familiar and foreign cried out for her attention. With the added weight of the barrier's youki choking her sixth sense she felt dizzy and disoriented, and she was deeply grateful for the way Kouga doggedly pressed forward, tugging her along forcefully in his wake.

Behind her she could feel the chain straining and pulling, her companions hesitating in the confusion of the chaos surrounding them. At one point she felt the chain strain so tight that she was sure she would lose hold of Miroku, leaving her companions lost in the illusions of the mist. Her limbs shook as she clung to him with all the strength she could muster, praying they could hold out for just a bit longer…

Abruptly she felt the some of the weight lift off of her sixth sense. She stumbled at the shift, Kouga hauling her upright by her arm and Shippou clinging to her neck to keep from falling.

"We're through," the wolf Lord announced, and Kagome realized as he spoke that the voices had died down to low murmurings some feet away from her.

Behind her she felt the remainder of her companions stumble through the barrier. Reaching up, she tugged her makeshift blindfold down off of her eyes. On her shoulder Shippou squirmed, struggling to remove his own, and she reached up absently to remove it for him as her eyes scanned down the line.

"Is everyone alright?" Sango called, scanning the group as well.

There was a smattering of dazed answers as the others went about removing their own blindfolds. As far as Kagome could tell everyone appeared to have gotten through unscathed, though Miroku was tense and slightly pale.

She could hear Kouga scenting the air at her side, and she turned back to him to ask if he could tell how close the kitsune might be as the youki was still too thick for her spiritual sense to be of much use.

Kagome froze.

Before them stretched a residence that rivaled the court in size, built in a bizarre mirror of its style. The buildings seemed to curl in on one another, winding and curving with serpentine fluidity off into the distance in lieu of the court's ordered lines and rows.

"By the kami," Kagome breathed, eyes wide. "It's enormous."

Kouga frowned.

"The scent trail is confused from here," he said. "I can smell them everywhere, but there's no source."

"Well, they are in there somewhere," Sango said, coming up beside them. "Likely this has been their home for so long that their scent has permeated the whole place. We need only find one of them and request an audience with their clan head now that we are past the barrier."

"Sango-sama is correct," Miroku put in. "By nature kitsune are not confrontational. We need only let them know we come on a peaceful errand. We entered inoffensively enough. The clan head should at least be inclined to hear us out."

Sango nodded.

"Let's go then," she said, turning back to face the others. "We are moving forward. Follow my lead, and remember to treat anyone you might encounter with the same respect you would treat a member of the court. Understood?"

The taiji-ya answered in a chorus of affirmatives and Sango motioned them forward.

They entered through the nearest building, a sizable one featuring only one large room. It appeared to serve ceremonial purposes, a raised dais at the head of the room its most prominent feature.

"Is anyone here?" Kagome called, her voice echoing strangely in the room. "Please, we mean no harm. We have come from the court to request an audience with your clan head."

There was no response, not even the slightest stirring to be seen. She looked to Sango, who motioned the group on towards a covered walkway to their right that led into another building.

The next room was much smaller, built in the design of a traditional tea room, and also appeared entirely empty. A quick scan revealed it to be so, and Sango ushered them on into the next room. On Kagome's shoulder Shippou frowned, oddly silent as he scanned the rooms.

A twisting covered walkway led them into the next building, which appeared to be an archive room. Shelves lined the walls and a long table took up most of the center of it, scrolls scattered haphazardly. For all the appearance of recent use, the room proved to be as empty as the ones before it.

"Perhaps they sensed it when we penetrated the barrier," Sango said thoughtfully, eyeing the room. "And they went into hiding to protect themselves. If we could just find even one of them…"

She trailed off, frowning as her eyes moved over the group.

"Where are Noriko and Haru-san?" she said after a moment.

A murmur went up among the group as they looked to one another and about the room. The two were nowhere to be seen, though.

"Perhaps they are still back in the tea room," Kagome suggested.

Sango's frown hardened.

"They should know better than to go off on their own," she said. "Come on. We need to go back and find them. And everyone stay close, do you hear me?"

She led them back along the walkway to the tea room they had just left. Only, it was not a tea room.

It was a ceremonial room. A large ceremonial room with a dais at its head.

Kagome's brow furrowed.

"What…?" she said. "Did we…did we take a wrong turn somewhere?"

Sango shook her head, her expression darkening rapidly in concern.

"No," she said. "No. I am certain that was the way that we came. But how did we end up back here?"

Kagome turned to Kouga, her mouth open to ask whether or not he might be able to catch Noriko and Haru's scent. Kouga, however, was not there.

Nor were Miroku, Kohaku, or two of the male taiji-ya, they discovered after a moment. A concerned murmur went up among the remainder of the group as Sango and Kagome turned to one another.

"First things first," Sango said, determined to remain calm despite the situation. "We need to find them. If we just retrace our steps-"

Kagome shook her head.

"First we need to figure what is happening," she insisted, keeping her voice low enough that the others could not hear. "Wandering will do us no good. We will only continue to be scattered at this rate."

"I know what it is."

Both women blinked, surprised at the unexpected entrant into the conversation. They turned to Shippou, his childish face unusually serious as he stood atop Kagome's shoulder.

"It's not real," he said simply. "They're controlling it and shifting it around whenever we move. I couldn't tell at first, 'cuz there's something real underneath it. Since there's a real part to it, it's harder to sense."

"You mean the castle is an illusion?" said Sango, eyes widening. "All of it?"

Shippou nodded.

"A really good one," he said. "I can only feel it a little."

"You said they are controlling it," Kagome pointed out. "So they must be somewhere nearby. Do you know how to find them, Shippou-chan?"

Again the kitsune nodded, his chest puffing out a bit as it became obvious that they were relying on him for this one.

"We hafta find the real part," he said. "There's one part of the real thing underneath that's part of the trick, too."

"Alright," said Sango, nodding more to herself than to them. "We just need to find that to break the illusion, then."

She turned back to inform the others.

She froze.

They were gone, every last one of them as quietly and as quickly as if they had never existed.

"No!" Sango cried, starting forward as if she still had a hope of catching them. "They were just-! How-?"

"They musta shifted it again," said Shippou, green eyes rounding. "They're fast."

"Where are they?" Sango asked.

"Different part of the trick," said Shippou. "They'll be stuck 'till they find the real thing."

"Then we have to find it," said Sango. "They do not even know to look for anything."

Shippou nodded, hopping down from Kagome's shoulder. He started off towards the dais, the two women following quickly behind him.

"Do you know where it is?" Kagome asked as they went.

"Sorta," Shippou answered, leading them through a doorway behind the dais opposite the one they had first entered through. "The real thing is always at the center. So we hafta find the center."

Sango and Kagome exchanged a look. In the winding mess of buildings it was hard to imagine where any sort of center might be.

The entryway behind the dais led out to a jumbled walkway that wound between the various buildings. The young kitsune skidded to an abrupt halt in front of them, tail ramrod straight behind him and brow furrowed as his eyes darted about.

"Shippou-chan?" Kagome said, Sango at her side as she came to a halt just behind him.

"They're changing it again."

No sooner had the words left his mouth than a low grinding noise filled the air around them. Instinctively Kagome moved forward, scooping the kitsune protectively into her arms. Sango tensed, her stance shifting defensively as her hand moved to hover over the hilt of the wakizashi at her waist. She had reluctantly left hiraikotsu back at the campsite, the group agreeing that it would seem far too aggressive to bring so large a weapon.

For several long moments it was hard to be sure where the sound was coming from, three pairs of eyes flitting about anxiously in search of the source. Some movement just on the fringe of Kagome's vision revealed what was happening, though.

The buildings all around them were moving, shifting and twining about one another so slowly it was almost imperceptible. As they watched, though, they began to speed up, winding and twisting snakelike all about the three.

With a jolt Kagome realized that the buildings had formed a ring about them, the circle tightening and closing rapidly. She stumbled back a step, clutching Shippou more tightly to herself. Sango stuck close to her side, her eyes darting about rapidly in search of any sort of break between the buildings that they might be able to get through.

"Sango-chan…"

"An opening," Sango murmured tensely, reaching out to grip Kagome's arm. "If I move you follow as quickly as you can, understand? Come on, we just need a small one…"

But there were none to be seen and the buildings were moving faster, making it unlikely they would make it through even if they found one. The massive blurs were pressing closer, close enough that the wind they created tugged at their hair and clothing.

It was going to crush them, Kagome realized frantically. Shippou and Sango….

"Go forward!" Shippou cried, tugging at Kagome's hair. "Go!"

"It'll crush us!"

"Only if you think it will!" he called, struggling to be heard over the grinding of the buildings. "It's not real, remember? You just hafta think it's not real!"

Kagome hesitated. They had walked around inside those buildings, felt the walls and the floors. They felt real. The whirling press of them, the wind they were creating, felt real.

Sango seized her arm, yanking her forward.

"It's not real!" she cried, the whirling mass not an inch from the tip of her nose.

Both women shut their eyes tight, running headfirst into the whirring wooden masses.

And straight through. There was a moment of resistance like moving through water, the weight of the cloying youki all around increasing on Kagome's sixth sense. But then they were on the other side, back on the winding walkway as if nothing had ever happened.

Kagome clutched Shippou, her heart pounding a deafening tattoo in her ears. Out of the corner of her eye she could see Sango, pale as she breathed a sigh of relief.

They were trapped deep in the illusion. Even the conscious knowledge that it was an illusion was scarcely enough to dissuade their senses at this point. They needed to find the thing Shippou was talking about soon or they risked the illusion drawing them in so deeply that it became their reality.

Shippou tensed in her arms.

"Run!" he yelped.

Both women took off without hesitation. Sango reached out, taking hold of Kagome's arm as they went. Of the two she was the faster runner, dragging Kagome slightly to make certain that they were not separated.

Behind them there was a deep rumbling growing. Kagome could feel the earth beneath her feet trembling. She dared a glance back.

Mere feet behind them the walkway was crumbling away, the paved stones collapsing inward to open up a yawning chasm. The chasm was growing every moment, spreading and racing quickly down the path just behind them. But that was not all.

The chasm was filled with flames. Sulfur and the odor of rotting and burning flesh wafted up from it. Hands, clawed and many-fingered and withered and fleshless, reached up, groping blindly after living flesh.

It was the first layer of hell.

Kagome gasped, stumbling as her foot caught on something in the path. The chasm loomed close, the flames licking at the back of her left heel.

There was a sharp pull on her arm and she went flying, clutching Shippou tight to her chest as she rolled several feet forward along the path. She scrabbled upright hurriedly as soon as she skidded to a stop, scanning desperately for Sango.

She was nowhere to be seen. The chasm loomed large in Kagome’s vision.

"Sango!" she cried, realizing with cold horror that her friend had thrown her free of the void at her own expense.

Shippou pulled roughly at her hair as she moved to go back after the taiji-ya.

"You can't!" he snapped. "We're almost there, I can feel it! C'mon!"

Kagome hesitated, her heart twisting in her chest as she gazed back at the flaming pit. With a groan of frustration that was half scream she spun on her heel, taking off back down the walkway as the chasm loomed up just behind her.

She ran with everything she had, feet pounding hard against the walkway. The chasm seemed to be spreading faster now, scarcely a hand’s breadth behind her as she ran. Several times she nearly slipped, managing to keep just ahead of the stones as they collapsed behind her. If she could only find the center she could free Sango and the others…

"There!" Shippou cried, pointing just ahead.

A large tree loomed up in the center of the walkway, large enough to rival the Goshinboku in size. Kagome cried out in relief, sprinting for it with the last of her energy.

She stretched out a hand, grazing the trunk with the tips of her fingers just as the ground beneath her crumbled. She experienced a moment of bizarre weightlessness before screaming as she was plunged down into darkness.

Only to land on some soft, spongy, slightly crunchy mass, her body curled protectively around the kitsune in her arms.

Kagome lay still for several long moments, her eyes shut tightly and her ears filled with the sound of her own pulse. Slowly she opened her eyes, blinking in the dimness that greeted her.

"Shippou-chan?" she said. "Are you alright?"

He replied with what sounded like a reassurance, though the sound was muffled against her chest. She uncurled herself from around him and he wriggled free of her, breathing a sigh of relief.

"I'm alright," he said, blinking up at her as she sat up. "Dunno where we are, though."

Neither did Kagome. The softness they had fallen atop appeared to be a bed of mixed mosses, loam, and dead leaves. Above them was a sizable hole, light shining down to illuminate the bed itself. Anything beyond the circle of light was too dark to make out.

"Unfair," a voice announced from somewhere to their left, causing them both to jump. "She hired a kitsune to help her. I move for immediate disqualification."

Kagome realized suddenly that while there was still pressure on her spiritual sense, it was not the clogging, disorienting pressure she had felt before. It was no longer clouded by thick layers of youki, but rather filled with hundreds of distinct youki. They surrounded them, hidden in the darkness. Kagome strained to see, moving closer to Shippou though she could sense no malice.

It became unnecessary a moment later, though, as dozens of balls of kitsune-bi sparked, drifting upward to gather at the ceiling and light the room. Kagome blinked, raising a hand to shield her eyes against the sudden brightness as she looked out.

They were in a spacious underground burrow, the walls composed of tightly packed earth and tree roots protruding through the high ceiling. Much of the floor was littered with the same leaves and loam that formed the bed on which they had landed, and Kagome could see several tunnels around the room that likely lead into other chambers.

On all sides of them stood the youkai Kagome was sensing, hundreds of kitsune of various sizes and tail numbers. She was amazed to see how closely they resembled Shippou in coloring. He might easily have stepped out among the group and claimed them as family.

"I second the disqualification motion," a second voice piped up, a male kitsune with four tails. "She forced one of our own to help her. That's clearly cheating."

"Cheating?" Kagome echoed, looking to him. "Please, I lost my friends and I need to speak with your-"

"Just because we're tricksters doesn't mean we keep company with liars and cheats," a female kitsune with three tails put in crossly.

"Take the boy from her," the voice that had first spoken, a female with seven tails, commanded. "We'll not be letting the court take advantage of our own. And put her back out. See if she's got any chance of earning an audience on her own."

Several kitsune stepped forward, one of them taking hold of Shippou. His eyes went wide and he writhed furiously against the man's grip.

"Wait!" Kagome cried, lunging to grab him back.

Two kitsune caught hold of her arms, though, forcing them behind her back and pulling her away.

"Wait, please! I didn't-!"

"Hold her!"

"Ow, he bit me!"

"Just grab her by the-"

"Kagome! Kagome!"

"Shippou-chan! Please, you can't take him! Shippou-chan is my-"

"Kagome is my Ma!"

Shippou's cry echoed in the chamber, silencing the chaos that had erupted. He glared out at them all, green eyes bright with tears. The grip of the man holding him loosened and he wriggled free, moving quickly to Kagome's side to clutch at her robes.

"Your mother?" echoed the seven-tailed female incredulously.

"My Ma," Shippou repeated adamantly, turning a defiant look on her. "My parents died and now Kagome takes care of me. She didn't steal me or force me or nothin'. And you can't take her from me!"

The woman blinked, her eyes sliding from Shippou to Kagome and back again as she considered this. She frowned.

"I seem to have misunderstood the situation," she said slowly. "I apologize. Please release her."

The two men holding her released her arms. She knelt down and Shippou leapt up into her arms, clinging to her neck. Kagome wrapped her arms around him, scowling faintly at the woman. She was coming to the end of her threshold for this sort of nonsense.

"I want to see my companions now," she said firmly, meeting the woman's eyes as she rose.

"I can promise you they're safe. You freed them when you broke the illusion," the woman replied. "First we will go to see the clan head. You've earned the right fairly. Come."

She beckoned to her, turning and starting off down one of the tunnels. The crowd of kitsune between them parted, allowing Kagome passage.

She blinked, standing still for a moment. All of that struggle and now she was simply to be led to the clan head? It was difficult not to be wary of them, especially after they had attempted to take Shippou from her mere moments ago.

She frowned, her arms tightening around the boy as she moved to follow. There was not much for it. She could not afford to upset them as it was unlikely she would be able to find her friends and escape on her own. The best she could do was to keep up her guard against any further tricks.

The woman glanced over her shoulder at her as she led her down the tunnel, kitsune-bi winking into existence overhead as they went.

"I am sorry for the misunderstanding," she said. "You have to admit, though, that the court isn't known for its benevolence."

Kagome was silent, in no mood to respond. A thought occurred to her, though.

"How did you know I am from the court?"

"You think we did not feel it when you first crossed our barrier?" the woman replied, cocking a fiery brow as she glanced back at her. "That barrier has been in place longer than three times your years at least. We each have a link to it. We were watching you from the moment you crossed it."

"Into the second illusion, you mean?" Kagome said, eyeing her a bit resentfully.

She nodded, choosing to ignore Kagome’s slight pique.

"Generally the first barrier works well enough," she explained. "But when it doesn't it does serve as a good trick to hide the second illusion. Everyone always assumes that a trick must conceal the truth. Sometimes, though, a trick merely hides another trick. That's what makes life so amusing."

The corners of her lips curled upwards in a manner that was purely vulpine. Kagome's frown deepened.

"I am sorry if I cannot share your amusement," she said. "I merely wished for an audience with your clan head."

"And you will get one," the woman returned evenly. "Even more, you'll have earned it. Isn't that better? That's simply how we do things. We've little interest in the affairs of the world outside our clan. We've no need for it. If you wish to gain our attention, you earn it. Our illusions are tests. If you can get past them, you're worth paying some attention to. Besides which, they're highly entertaining."

The grin widened, her tails flicking happily. Kagome frowned, but to herself she begrudgingly conceded the point. If they were sufficient in and of themselves, there was no reason to risk dealing with the outside world. It only made sense that they would expect outsiders to earn their acknowledgment. And after going through all of that, Kagome had every intention of claiming what she had earned.

They came to the end of the tunnel and the woman turned left, Kagome trailing after her. They entered a second, shorter tunnel and then a third and a fourth, winding about so that Kagome lost all sense of direction. She felt a swift pang of panic, realizing that she had no idea how to get back to where they had first landed.

They came at last to a chamber, this one already illuminated by several balls of kitsune-bi before they entered. The room was even more spacious than the first had been, furnished most prominently with a raised dais. The same raised dais they had seen when they had first entered the illusion of the castle, Kagome realized.

Atop it sat an older kitsune male, his hair and fur gone entirely silver with age. The full nine tales fanned out behind him, a playful grin hovering on the edges of his mouth as he watched them enter. He spread his hands in a gesture of welcome, green eyes bright.

"And here is today's entertainment," he said, mirth bubbling beneath every syllable. "Congratulations. You've earned your time with me. Please, come in."

Kagome bowed low, setting aside any irritation for the moment. Truthfully she was a bit awed at the sight of him. Most spiritualists would likely go their entire lives without ever seeing a nine-tailed kitsune. It took centuries, longer than even most youkai could survive, to acquire the ninth tail, and there were rumors among spiritualists that the ninth tail could only be bestowed through a direct meeting with one of the kami.

"Sit, please," he said, motioning her forward. "You, too, Kumiko. Thank you for bringing them."

The seven-tailed woman, Kumiko, bowed to him, moving forward to take a place on one of the several cushions scattered before the throne. Kagome followed suit, setting Shippou down on a cushion beside her. The clan head eyed him, cocking a brow.

"And how did you come to have one of our cubs?" he said, expression sobering slightly.

"Kagome's my Ma," Shippou said hurriedly, defensive after what had just happened.

"His mother?" said the clan head, looking to Kagome.

"I have been caring for Shippou-chan since he lost his parents," Kagome said, bowing her head.

The clan head considered her for a long moment before nodding. He waved a hand.

"Go on, then," he said. "You've earned the audience you were so eager for. Make use of it."

Kagome nodded, folding her hands in her lap.

"I have come from the court in the hopes of begging a favor of you," she began, straightening as she met his eyes. "I am well aware, of course, of how little inclined you likely are to have anything to do with the court. I hope, however, that you will at least consider what I have to say."

"I am willing to consider anything if it is interesting enough," the clan head replied, fangs peeking over his lower lip as his easy grin returned.

One corner of Kagome's mouth turned up slightly.

"Well, I suppose we are both in luck then," she said. "What it lacks in probability, my proposal makes up for in interest."

She met his eyes squarely, spreading her hands open before her.

"It is the Tennō-sama's great wish, and my mission, to unite the whole of our nation in peace and prosperity," she said firmly.

The clan head's brows, whiter than snow, rose incredulously, but his eyes brightened further as they studied her.

"That's a lofty aim if I've ever heard one," he commented.

"It is," Kagome agreed, nodding. "But is one that his Majesty and I are willing to give everything for. Either I will achieve it or I will be brought down trying."

"You've proved your determination well enough in managing to reach me," the clan head said, waving a hand. "No need to sell me on that. And I can guess easily enough that you've come seeking the support of my clan in this endeavor, so you may skip that, as well. Let's come to another interesting part of it. What is it that my clan will get in return for agreeing to support the Tennō-sama in this grand ambition of his?"

Kagome blinked, hesitating. She had hoped to have Kouga with her when it came time to meet with the youkai clans. He understood their interests and workings far better than she, and she had hoped that his speaking to them from one clan head to another would help in her cause. But it seemed she was to be on her own in this.

The truth was that the Kitsune Clan, unlike the villages, did not serve to gain much in agreeing to serve the Tennō. They were already capable of protecting themselves and had no apparent need of an additional supply of food. They certainly had no need of a court spiritualist to tend to them. Save the promise of support from the court should they ever fall on hard times, there was little Kagome could offer to them.

She knew, though, looking into his face and having gone through such a trial just to reach him, that a list of practical reasons would get her nowhere anyway. No, there was something else needed here.

She drew a deep breath, squaring her shoulders and offering him a smile. It was time to take a risk.

"Nothing," she pronounced, shrugging. "I offer you nothing."

"Nothing?" the clan head echoed, sitting up straighter in his surprise. "You would offer me nothing?"

Kagome nodded, forcing herself to smile more widely as she pushed the ploy.

"Precisely," she said. "You and I both know well enough that, materially speaking, there is nothing I could offer you that your clan does not already possess. Although…"

"Although?" he picked up when she trailed off, his eyes trained avidly on her.

Inwardly Kagome cheered. She had his interest.

"Well," she said, drawing out the word carefully. "There is one thing that the freedom to enter the court as you please would allow you an abundance of."

She paused, meeting his eyes knowingly. He shifted, leaning forward.

"And that would be?" he pressed.

"There is one thing that the court will never lack for," Kagome said, holding up a single finger to him. "And that is people. People who are always eager for a show. People who are practically begging to be tricked."

She tilted her head, lifting her brows suggestively. A grin spread slowly over the clan head's face as he caught her meaning.

"You are inviting us, then, to play tricks on your fellows in the court?" he said, amusement lilting in his voice.

"They could use a good stirring up every now and again," she replied simply.

"And it's fun," Shippou added. "They're real easy to trick."

Kagome glanced at the boy, wondering exactly what he had been up to in the court when she was not around. She turned her attention quickly back to the clan head, though, eager to gauge his response.

His grin was still in place as he looked from her to Shippou and back again consideringly. At length he rose, tails winding behind him as he descended the dais to stand before them.

"I like you," he said simply, looking down into Kagome's face. "However, liking is hardly enough to justify committing my clan to something of this magnitude."

Kagome felt her expression fall. She blinked, her gaze falling to the ground beneath his paw-like feet.

"Oh…" she said, at a loss.

The clan head knelt down to her level. Reluctantly Kagome met his eyes. The clan head grinned, his eyes almost unbearably bright at so close a distance.

"At least," he said, such warmth in his voice that she could almost feel it like a physical thing. "It would not be enough for anyone else. I, however, am a kitsune and my clan is a clan of kitsune. Whim and inclination is more than enough for us."

Kagome stared at him, eyes widening.

"W-What?"

The clan head laughed, the sound something like a yelping bark.

"You made it through our illusions without attacking even once," he said. "You are sharp enough to play to our interests in offering me a court full of victims for our tricks. And you've gone as far as to take in one of our own when no human law could have held you to it. In short, I find you highly interesting. And, as I've said, interest is everything. Of course, I will make no promise without talking to the rest of my clan first."

He rose to his full height once more.

"Wait here with Kumiko for a bit," he instructed, turning to start off down one of the tunnels. "I'll return once I've spoken with them. Kumiko, get them something to eat while you wait."

Kumiko bowed in acknowledgment and the clan head exited the chamber. Kagome blinked after him, unable to believe what she had just heard.

"He'll gain their approval," Kumiko said, and Kagome turned to her. "As long as they see he likes you, they'll agree. We trust him. He's a nine tails, after all."

She glanced at Shippou who, taking the clan head's exit as permission to do as he liked once more, had made his way onto Kagome's lap.

"What's your name again, little one?" she asked.

"Shippou," the boy answered, settling in against Kagome.

"And how old are you?"

"Twenty seven and a half years," Shippou said with an air of pride, chin lifting.

"Still very young," Kumiko commented, and Shippou scowled. "Tell me, how much of our arts were your parents able to teach you before they passed?"

Shippou blinked, cocking his head. His brow furrowed as he considered this for a moment.

"Enough," he answered, shrugging.

"Then you don't want to learn more?" Kumiko asked, darting a glance at Kagome.

Shippou shrugged once more.

"I guess so," he said.

Kumiko turned her gaze fully to Kagome.

"I agree with the clan head," she said to her. "I like you. And you did the boy a great kindness in taking him into your care. But don't you think he would do better among his own kind? There's only so much you can do for him as a human. There are plenty who would care for him here."

Kagome looked at her for a long moment, at a loss.

"Shippou-chan is my charge," she said at last, frowning. "I promised him that I would care for him."

"I understand your attachment," Kumiko conceded, inclining her head. "But I suggest you consider what's best for the boy, as well. Humans and youkai are vastly different creatures. Perhaps things are fine now, but as he grows you'll find that you understand each other less and less. There are boundaries that can't be crossed, you know."

She rose before Kagome could form an answer, bowing to them.

"If you'll excuse me, I'll go fetch something for you to eat," she said.

She disappeared down one of the connecting tunnels, leaving the two alone. Shippou turned in Kagome's lap, gazing up at her with troubled eyes.

"I don't wanna stay here," he said, shaking his head. "I wanna stay with you. You promised, Kagome."

"Shippou-chan…" she said softly.

She had promised. And she wanted nothing more than to keep him at her side, to watch over him and make certain that he grew up well. Shippou was hers. The kami had tied them together from the moment they had first met. It was not a bond so easily broken.

But she had to think of him first. Kumiko was not wrong. There were certain things that she would simply never be able to teach him. She would never be one of his kind, and there might come a day when he resented her for it. If the Northern Kitsune Clan could provide for him what she could not…

"Kagome!" Shippou cried, watching her expression shift.

She winced.

"Shippou-chan, please," she said softly. "Kumiko-san is right. There are things I simply can't teach you. Please, just think about it for a moment. They would care for you here. You'd be among your own kind and-"

"I don't care about that!" the boy cried, tears pricking in the corners of his eyes. "It's stupid and I don't care! Why do you want to give me away, Kagome? Didn't I help you? I'll be good, I promise! I'll be good forever, okay? Just don't…don't give me away…"

His lower lip trembled dangerously and he bit down on it, tiny fangs digging into flesh. Tears spilled over nonetheless, tracking down his cheeks.

"Oh, no…Shippou, no, never…"

Kagome reached out, wrapping her arms about him. He hiccuped, choking back a sob, and pressed his face into her shoulder. His small hands curled in the fabric of her robes, clutching at her desperately.

"It's not like that at all, Shippou," she murmured against his hair, heart wrenching in her chest. "I would never try to get rid of you. I love you. And because I love you, I want what's best for you, even if that means I can't be with you. I want you to be with people like you who can understand you-"

"If you love me, why does it matter?" Shippou mumbled against her shoulder. "Kind or whatever. I don't care. If you love someone, you love them, right? No matter what kind they are, right? So it doesn't matter, youkai or human. I just wanna stay with you."

Kagome blinked, surprised at the simple truth of his words. Whatever else the Northern Kitsune Clan might be able to offer, she knew without the faintest doubt that no one could love the boy more than she could. And it was her that he had chosen to love after his parents had passed. Who was anyone to question that? Who was to say that those bonds of affection were not enough?

"You're right, Shippou-chan," she said softly, bringing a hand up to stroke back his hair. "I promised you, and I love you. We'll stick together for as long as you want, alright?"

He murmured something unintelligible against her shoulder and pressed closer. Kagome held him more tightly, silently vowing to herself that she would love and care for him as much as any parent ever could.

* * *

Kumiko was correct. Not long after she had returned with food, the clan head returned with word that the clan had approved his suggestion. Kagome, both pleased to hear it and eager to have her friends returned to her, quickly explained all the details for him before requesting that they be allowed to set out. The clan head granted her wish with good humor, well aware of what an experience their illusions could be for those unaccustomed to them.

Once the group was reunited and explanations were made to all, they were escorted out by the clan head himself. He was able to open the barrier for them and wished them all well before sealing it shut behind them.

No one was particularly eager to discuss what had happened to them within the confines of the illusion. Some of the men among the taiji-ya who had first been separated from the group appeared to be particularly rattled. Despite the success of the mission, they were all glad enough come morning to set out once more.

After leaving the kitsune clan lands behind, they continued to head northward along the river in search of villages. They came across several situated on or near its banks before at last reaching its tributary. They expressed varying levels of wariness and even anger at the arrival of Kagome and her companions, but with patience, perseverance, and explanations from both Kagome and Haru they were able to win over all save three.

The group decided to continue heading northward. Kouga informed them that that was where the Northern Bakeneko Clan was rumored to be, though it had been quite some time since they had last been seen, and Sango knew of several clan residences that might possibly have villages attached in the area. It would also serve to take them closer to Hokkaido where some of the trade ports that Sango had set her sights on were.

As they travelled thoughts of Inuyasha continued to plague Kagome with a frequency that astounded her as much as it left her disheartened. Part of it, of course, had to do with what the kitsune's barrier had shown her. That that had been the first image her heart had conjured…that she had been so hopeful for that brief moment at the sight of him…

Still, despite all of it, she slowly resumed her nightly routine of gazing into their link. Only glances, brief peeks solely for the purpose of assuring herself of his safety. Thankfully it served to ease her thoughts somewhat, rather than exacerbating them as she had feared, and she realized that at least part of it was merely worry for his sake. Worry, at least, she was equipped to deal with.

The rest of her thoughts she attempted to manage by seeking out Kouga, although he was generally at her side and so very little seeking was actually involved. He was not the most brilliant conversationalist she had ever met, but by virtue of his position within his clan he had a great many stories to tell.

Kagome realized that, for someone she now considered a friend and whom she hoped to see as a romantic interest, she knew remarkably little about him. In a strange way it gave her hope.

His stories were generally interesting if clumsily narrated, and they made for a decent distraction during long stretches of riding. The more she learned of him, the more she was capable of appreciating him. Above anything he cared for his clan, and that was something that Kagome could understand. She felt much the same way about her own village and family.

He seemed to regain some of the confidence he had lost as she sought him out. It was strange for her to realize that, despite everything that had passed between them, they actually got on fairly well together. It was comfortable. It gave her hope.

Observing Sango and Miroku offered another distraction of sorts, though it was a rather exasperating one. Miroku was much the same as he had always been-jovial, wont to touch or look at inappropriate moments, and friendly with every woman who entered his general vicinity. Sango, on the other hand, was beginning to retreat somewhat.

She appeared to have lost some of her confidence after her initial advances had failed to make any noticeable impression upon the houshi. To some degree Kagome could not help but feel that Miroku sensed this in her, seeking her out when she failed to come to him. Still, that was as far as he could ever bring himself to go.

Kagome could only look on, feeling rather helpless. Occasionally she tried to encourage Sango not to give up just yet, to pursue it just a little further, but she was aware of how feeble the words were coming from someone trying to give up on her own feelings. If her friends were truly bent on running from their feelings, what right did she have to say anything about it?

* * *

"Who knows?" Kouga said with a shrug. "No one really remembers, but everyone thinks that village is where their masters used to live before they were all wiped out. No one's sure whether or not they're the ones who killed them."

"So there is a chance that they will try and attack us?" Sango said, frowning.

They had reached the location of the Northern Bakeneko Clan's rumored residence after half a week's travel. The previous night they had set up camp near the village Kouga believed them to dwell in, though far enough from it that they would not be spotted before they chose to be. Now Sango had called them all together, attempting to lay out some sort of strategy to prevent any mishaps the likes of what had happened with the kitsune.

Kouga shrugged once more.

"More likely than not," he said. "Their clan is closer to mine than most of the other big clans in nature, and I know we'd attack anyone setting foot in our territory."

Sango was silent, expression calculating as her gaze shifted to the map spread out in their midst. She tapped the location of the ghost village on the map before dragging her finger over the surrounding area.

"The village is situated atop a rise," she said. "All the surrounding land appears to be flatlands, meaning that they will have the high ground no matter what angle we choose to approach from. We would be highly vulnerable to attack."

A mutter came from somewhere within the group. Sango, Kagome, and Miroku's eyes turned simultaneously towards the sound, landing on one of the male taiji-ya. He returned their looks with a baleful one of his own.

Sango straightened, pinning him with a look.

"Something you would like to say, cousin?" she said.

The man straightened to his full height, a challenge in the stubborn set of his jaw.

His name was Tachibana Gorou, the fifth son of a rather minor branch of the Tachibana clan from what Kagome could recall. He had always been a rather sullen looking fellow, but he had been especially moody since they had departed the kitsune clan's land. Every time Kagome happened to look he appeared to be sulking or muttering about something to the other men of the taiji-ya.

Kagome had sensed his discontent growing, but had been uncertain how to address it and reluctant to risk the appearance of usurping Sango's authority by attempting to confront him. It seemed that everything would come to a head now, though.

"I was simply saying, cousin," Gorou said, the word akin to a curse as he uttered it. "That I hope this mission will be led more successfully than our last."

Sango's jaw tightened momentarily, the insult obviously landing. Gorou smirked faintly.

"From what I recall," Miroku spoke up, voice calm despite the sharpness in his dark eyes. "Our last mission was a success, and it was in large part thanks to Sango-sama's bravery."

Kagome nodded vehemently in agreement. Sango shot the houshi a grateful glance before her eyes returned to Gorou. He scowled, first at Miroku and then at Sango.

"A success, you say?" he nearly sneered, lips curling away from his teeth. "Is that what you would call her allowing us all to walk right into their illusions? Eiji and I were stuck in a room where we thought we would be mauled by tigers! And you would call it a success simply because we all happened to escape with our lives?"

Sango flinched, her face going pale before coloring deeply. With anger or embarrassment Kagome could not tell, but she had opened her mouth to lash out in defense of her friend before she could stop herself. Miroku, however, beat her to it once more.

"And here I was under the impression that taiji-ya were trained to handle to themselves gracefully in dangerous situations, not to whine about how frightened they were," Miroku returned, tone sharpening slightly. "Or is it merely that you feel justified in criticizing Sango-sama for some  
other reason you will not come out with?"

Gorou's face twisted, his eyes narrowing on the houshi.

"I feel justified because the mission was a mess!" he snapped. "And because she will make another mess out of this one! She isn't meant to lead! She hasn't half the training or experience that any one of the men here has! Even now she hides behind you, a man, because she cannot-!"

"Enough!" Sango shouted, bringing her hand down hard against the map.

She eyed the group, her features pulled taut, and there was silence. She turned her gaze back to Gorou, face still deeply flushed in agitation.

"Miroku-sama defends me as a friend, cousin," she said. "But I am more than capable of addressing your concerns myself, however ungraciously you might fling them at me."

Gorou flushed faintly, but stubbornly held her eyes.

"I will concede the point that the mission involving the kitsune was poorly managed on my part," Sango resumed more levelly. "Though it ended in success, I took too many risks in attaining it. I went in knowing too little. I will not make that mistake again, and I apologize for subjecting you all to more risk than necessary."

Sango bowed her head to the taiji-ya, though the gesture was slightly stiff. A faint smile played around the corners of Miroku's mouth as he watched her, the pride lightening his eyes unmistakable. Kagome blinked, surprised at her friend's choice of tactics.

Save her brother, Sango easily outranked any of the taiji-ya there as far as her standing within the Tachibana clan. Even had she not been named head of Kagome's guard, they would have been expected to defer to her in some matters. But she was not asserting her rank to force their deference. She was humbling herself before them.

Gorou frowned, a hint of uncertainty creeping across his features.

"As to the concern you have expressed over my inexperience," Sango pressed on. "I concede on that point, as well. Compared to the men of the clan, I do lack in experience. And I lack in experience because of the men of this clan. You know it as well as I that women are seldom sent on missions when men are available to be sent instead. However, I have studied and trained harder than anyone since I was young. And if proof of my abilities is necessary to set you all at ease about my leadership once and for all, I am more than willing to provide it."

The group was silent for a beat, looking to one another uncertainly.

"How?" Gorou ventured at last, wary.

Sango squared her shoulders, her chin tipping up slightly.

"I will carry out this mission with the bakeneko alone," she said.

"Sango-chan!" Kagome burst out, unable to bite her tongue.

"Sango-sama," Miroku said almost in the same instant. "While it is a laudable ambition, I cannot-"

"You cannot object," Sango broke in, not unkindly. "You are as much under my command as they are, Houshi-sama."

He looked at her for a long moment, the concern on his face unmasked. She offered him a small smile before turning back to Gorou.

"Well?" she pressed.

"I accept," he said readily. "Complete the mission and you will hear no more from me until we return to court."

"Then it is settled," Sango said with an air of finality, to stave off any further arguments. "I will begin preparations immediately. In the meantime I would like you to chart our route to the nearby clan residences. We will aim for the attached villages once we have finished here."

Gorou hesitated a moment before nodding.

"Fine," he said a bit tersely. "But I will require proof of your success before I take another order from you."

Sango nodded. The taiji-ya gathered up the map and retreated to the other side of the campsite to begin mapping the route, Noriko and Tomiko shooting Sango apologetic looks as they went.

Almost as soon as they were out of earshot Miroku turned to Sango, mouth set in a stern line.

"That was exceedingly foolish," he said, ire undisguised in a manner that was rare to him.

"You do not think I am capable of it?" Sango snapped in return, temper flaring readily enough now that the need of a cool head had passed.

"I think you suggested it on an impulse without considering the possible risks," Miroku said. "These men are already yours to command. Let them whine amongst themselves if they will. They will not disobey you."

"They will not respect me, either!" Sango said. "And it is their respect that I want, not their grudging obedience. I want them to acknowledge me as their equal, regardless of my rank or the fact that I happened to be born a woman. Why would you ask me to be content with anything less?"

She looked to Kagome in askance, seeking her support. Kagome frowned, her eyes sliding away from the older woman's.

"I don't want you to get hurt, Sango-chan," she said softly.

Sango's frown deepened, disappointment flitting momentarily over her features before it was consumed by anger.

"Fine," she huffed, shaking her head. "I said I would do it on my own and I will. I do not require permission from either of you."

She turned on her heel and stormed away, likely not even certain herself where she was going. Kagome moved to go after her, but Miroku caught her arm.

"It is no use, Kagome-chan," he said. "I have seen that look on her face often enough. Nothing will change her mind now."

"We can't just let her go off on her own," Kagome protested. "The kami only know how many youkai are in that village and what they might do to her."

"Do not worry," Miroku replied, eyes still looking after Sango. "I believe I have a plan."

* * *

Miroku's 'plan' turned out to be less of a plan and more of an exercise in how to follow someone unnoticed.

Not long after stalking off, Sango returned to the campsite and announced to the group that she was beginning her mission. She did not bother with an explanation of what her plan was, but promised to bring back a token to prove her success when she returned. Gorou and some of the other men looked deeply skeptical, but made no further remark on it.

Sango mounted up and set off in the direction of the village, features set determinedly. Miroku waited for an appropriate stretch of time before announcing to the group that he was going to see if he could not catch some fish for that night's meal, casting Kagome a significant glance before ambling off casually in the direction of the small plain where some of the mounts were grazing.

Kagome handed Shippou off to Haru to watch, quickly inventing the excuse of having seen some valuable herbs growing down by the river's edge. The taiji-ya were too preoccupied with their own speculations about Sango's mission to pay her much attention and thankfully even Kouga did not ask to join her, past experience having taught him that she paid him little mind while focused on collecting herbs.

She slipped away after Miroku unnoticed, finding him waiting with one of the mounts in hand. He mounted up and she behind him, both figuring that one youkai would make for greater stealth than two.

"I feel a bit foolish doing it this way," Kagome confessed as they started off, carefully giving the campsite a wide berth to avoid being seen.

"Believe me, Kagome-chan, if there were any other option I would readily take it," he said. "But I know Sango-sama too well to believe that she would accept even the appearance of help. Her pride would never allow it. Nor would I have the other taiji-ya think that we are breaking the vow she made to them, however brash it might have been on her part or provoked on theirs."

"Then we won't step in unless it is absolutely necessary, right?" Kagome said.

Miroku nodded.

"Exactly," he said. "We will not intervene unless the situation becomes dire. I would not break Sango-sama's vow, but I would not have her sacrifice herself to earn the respect of swine, either."

Kagome was silent a moment, watching the line of his back as they rode.

"Do you think Sango-chan can do it?" she asked.

"Of course," Miroku answered without a blink of hesitation. "I have known Sango-sama since we were both young and have seen proof of her strength, physical and otherwise, a thousand times over. She has worked harder than anyone, and certainly harder than that lot back there, to become as skilled as she is. And while I am glad she finally seems ready to fully pursue a place among the taiji-ya as she has always wanted, I do not want to take any chances with her safety."

Behind him Kagome smiled to herself, partly at his obvious protectiveness and partly at his response. She felt much the same about their friend, although it did not keep her from worrying about this rather ambitious mission.

A thought occurred to her. She bit her lip, well aware that she should not meddle. Still, when was she going to get another chance like this?

"Then you do not mind Sango-chan choosing this way of life?" Kagome ventured, clutching at the back of his robes as their mount made a particularly large leap.

"Why should I?" Miroku asked, slight puzzlement in his voice.

"Well, Sango-chan worries, I think," Kagome hedged, speaking carefully to avoid revealing too much on her friend's behalf. "She knows that some in the court consider it unladylike for a woman to aspire to such a thing."

Miroku inclined his head in acknowledgement.

"There are certainly some," he said. "But I think that we both know there is little Sango-sama could do to make herself unladylike, or rather unappealing, as the case might be. She should not worry herself overly about it."

The latter was spoken lightly enough, but there was a sincerity hiding just beneath it that warmed Kagome all through.

The warmth dimmed a moment later, though, when another thought occurred to her. He obviously admired her. He was not put off in the least by her ambitions. So what kept him from her? Was he really so oblivious to her advances?

Kagome opened her mouth, wondering how in the world she would be able to frame this question obliquely, when Miroku reined their mount up into a sudden stop behind a large tree.

"There she is," he murmured.

Kagome shifted, leaning around him and the tree to catch a glimpse. Sango was still a distance ahead of them, but clearly visible because of all the flat, open grassland that surrounded the rise on which the village was situated. She appeared to be riding straight towards the village.

"She's not going to ride straight in, is she?" Kagome murmured, brow furrowing. "They will be on her in moments if she enters their territory."

Miroku shook his head, his eyes fixed on Sango.

"No," he said lowly. "She is no fool. She must have something in mind."

No sooner had he spoken than Sango's mount veered to one side, routing in a wide arch around the village. In a few moments she was out of sight, blocked by the bulk of the hill. Kagome waited, straining her eyes after the woman. She grew tense as long moments passed without any sight of her.

"Should we go after her?" she murmured anxiously to Miroku.

He shook his head.

"We'll wait a bit longer," he said. "She has something in mind."

Kagome frowned, but said nothing.

They waited in strained silence until at last Sango reappeared, riding back in the direction from which she had come. At the widest point in the clearing she reined in her mount, coming to a stop. She dismounted and stood facing the village, seemingly waiting for something.

It was difficult to tell from the distance they were at, but it looked to Kagome like Sango was wearing the special protective mask of the taiji-ya which kept them from breathing in the toxins and gases that certain youkai emitted. Several puzzling moments passed as Sango stood as motionless as a stone statue.

The wind kicked up, racing down the grassy plain. The grass bent and flattened beneath it, and in the distance something slowly became visible.

It appeared to be a cloud of some sort, ashen in color and being driven along by the wind. It billowed up and over the village's hill, consuming it in moments.

"There we go," Kagome heard Miroku murmur, voice low with pride. Raising his voice slightly, he said to her, "Cover your mouth, Kagome-chan."

She did so, bringing up the length of her sleeve to press over her mouth and nose. He did the same.

"What's going on?" Kagome asked, voice slightly muffled.

"She must have gone upwind of the village and set off some of the taiji-ya's poisons," he said. "Sango-sama must be trying to force them out. They won't be as aggressive if they are not on their own territory, and they will not be at an advantage. She chose high noon because the bakeneko are nocturnal by inclination. They will be confused, disoriented. This is when they will be least likely to try and put up a fight."

"Poison?" Kagome repeated. "Isn't that too much? They'll hardly be inclined to listen if we hurt them."

Miroku shook his head.

"I doubt that it is of that variety," he said. "The taiji-ya are masters in the creation of poisons. Likely that one is only potent enough to irritate the lungs, possibly to cause some lethargy."

"What if they just bolt, though?" Kagome asked, watching the poison-swathed village for any signs of movement. "Sango-chan can't possibly round them all up again."

"They will not go far," Miroku said with a certainty that surprised her. "Recall what Kouga-sama told us. They have remained in the village that housed their masters for years and years without moving. They will not abandon it so easily. Sango-sama must know that."

Kagome glanced at him, impressed at how well and how easily he seemed to understand what Sango was thinking. Her attention was quickly drawn back to the scene unfolding before them, motion near the village catching her eye.

The poison cloud was being driven down the plain by the wind, dispersing slowly as it went. Ahead of it ran a number of figures, slow and faltering in a way that told Kagome Miroku's guess about the type of poison was likely correct.

They were the bakeneko and their counter-parts, the neko-mata. The bakeneko were largely human in appearance, save cat-like ears, tails, and feet. The neko-mata, on the other hand, were among the more animal-like youkai in existence, their forms that of large, split-tailed cats.

They came towards Sango and she waited, unmoving even as the poisonous cloud swept past her. The youkai came to a halt several lengths from the taiji-ya, eyeing her uncertainly.

After a several moments the crowd parted and one of the bakeneko came forward, a male from what Kagome could tell. He appeared to be speaking, but to Kagome's great frustration they were too far away for the sound to carry. Sango bowed to the man, though if she replied or not was impossible to tell. The mask obscured her mouth.

The man spoke again, and Kagome strained her eyes to discern the expression on his face. His ears were partly pinned back and he certainly did not look pleased, but at least they had not attacked immediately. It was a good sign.

The conversation continued for a time with some of the other bakeneko chiming in, as well. Their upset seemed to ease into something akin to curiosity, tails whipping and flickering behind them, and at last some sort of agreement seemed to come out of it.

The bakeneko that had spoken first-Kagome assumed from his air of authority that he was the clan's head-gestured and a large neko-mata stalked forward. It was a light, burnished golden with black markings on its forehead, feet, ears, and tails. Its eyes were a deep blood red, its fangs elongated far past its lower lip. Its upper lip drew back in a snarl as it approached Sango, youki flaring brightly to life as otherworldly flames ignited around its paws.

For the first time since the encounter had started Sango moved back a step, and Kagome's heart jumped. All she did, though, was set hiraikotsu down and urge her mount to move further away from her. It did and she stepped forward once more, stance shifting defensively.

"She's fighting barehanded?" Miroku murmured, voice low with concern.

"Hiraikostu does too much damage," Kagome replied, her eyes never straying from the tense scene. "She must still be trying not to hurt them."

"And if they decide to attack all at once?" Miroku returned, shifting anxiously.

"That's what we are here for, isn't it?" Kagome said as reassuringly as she could manage.

Despite her words she could feel her pulse quickening. If they did all attack at once Sango did not stand a chance barehanded, and they would have to move quickly to prevent her from being hurt. Kagome forced herself to sit still, watching. Sango had known exactly what she was doing all the way up to this point. She wanted to believe she knew now, as well.

In a flash of motion the neko-mata pounced. Sango pivoted and flipped backwards, dodging easily and landing a distance away. The neko-mata turned sharply, lunging again. This time Sango flattened out, rolling under the blow.

A quick glance told Kagome that none of the other youkai were making any moves to join the fight. They merely looked on, their postures intent.

Even under the influence of the poison, the neko-mata Sango faced was unusually fast. Only the narrowest of turns kept its fangs from piercing her shoulder. Sango leapt back, landing solidly several lengths away. The neko-mata charged her again without pause.

This time, though, Sango did not dodge. She stood stock still until the youkai was so close that Kagome nearly cried out, leaping up at the last moment. She twisted in mid-air, landing solidly on the youkai's back and clamping her knees tight around its flanks. She reached for something at her belt, but the neko-mata's thrashing forced her to use her hands to hold on.

The neko-mata thrashed harder, bucking and writhing until a particularly violent kick of its back legs sent her flying. She landed hard on her back and the youkai was on her in moments.

Sango rolled, dodging the flaming paws as the neko-mata tried to bring them down on her. The watching youkai were cheering now, forming up into a half-circle about the combatants.

The neko-mata managed to trap Sango between its paws, bearing down with its fanged mouth open wide to deliver the final blow. Sango unsheathed the wakizashi at her waist in one smooth motion, the warning flash of the blade's arc forcing the youkai back.

Sango rose, sheathing the blade once more. If she had been serious about using it she could easily have landed the blow, Kagome realized. Unfortunately that likely meant the neko-mata had caught onto the feint, as well. It would not fall for that again.

It crouched, springing for her. Sango fell back as it reached her, legs kicking up and under its torso as its fangs came dangerously near her throat. The combination of her strength and its own momentum sent the youkai flying. Sango rolled back onto her feet in one fluid motion, pivoting and pursuing.

The neko-mata had scarcely gotten to its feet when she was on it again, managing to vault onto its back once more. This time she managed to pull from her waist the thing she had been reaching for before. It was the harness her mount had been wearing. Kagome had not noticed her slipping it off before, but she saw clearly enough now as she slipped it between the open jaws of the neko-mata.

It gnashed its teeth, thrashing madly as it tried to sever the harness. It was specially designed by the taiji-ya for their youkai mounts, though, so there was to be no breaking it.

The youkai fought harder to dislodge her, even going so far as to throw itself against the ground and roll. Sango would not be moved, taking the abuse and continuing to cling tightly to the reins attached to the harness.

Slowly, ever so slowly, its struggles began to weaken. Whether it was the poison slowing it down or it simply realized that no amount of struggling was going to dislodge the slightly battered but still tenacious woman Kagome was not sure, but at last the neko-mata's struggles ceased altogether.

It lowered its body to the ground, allowing Sango to dismount and remove the harness. A swirl of youki flared up around it, obscuring its hulking form for a moment.

When it faded there sat a youkai no bigger than a kitten, fearsome fangs and flames gone. It rolled over onto its back, exposing its vulnerable underbelly to Sango.

Whatever was going on, Sango had won.

Out of the corner of her eye Kagome could see Miroku fairly beaming, likely prouder than if he had done it himself. The bakeneko appeared to be stunned silent for a moment, watching the neko-mata and the woman who had mastered it. They moved forward at last when the now-tiny thing leapt up into Sango's arms.

The one who Kagome had assumed to be the clan head said something and bowed low before Sango. The rest of the clan mirrored the gesture. Sango gestured modestly for them to rise, but she fairly glowed with the joy of her success.

Kagome laughed aloud, the sound half joy and half awe.

Sango had just single-handedly won them the support of the Northern Bakeneko Clan.

* * *

Sango and the bakeneko continued their discussion awhile longer, but Kagome and Miroku made sure to leave not long after they were certain Sango was safe. There was no use in possibly angering the woman by allowing her to discover that they had followed her, and they could not be seen by the others returning at the same time as her lest they become suspicious.

They returned the mount to the small plain with the others and Miroku went ahead of her to the campsite, intending to tell them that he had not been able to catch anything. Kouga would likely step in to make up for it and catch that night's meal.

Kagome remained behind, wandering the river bank for a time and collecting what herbs she could find to make her own ruse plausible before rejoining the others.

The men of the taiji-ya were still grouped together, though they had long since finished mapping the route. They cast glances in the direction Sango had gone, their looks both grim and self-satisfied each time she failed to appear. Her failure would merely confirm everything they had ever been told.

Noriko and Tomiko sat together and apart from the men now, their looks anxious. Not only would Sango's failure or success dictate how they would be treated for the remainder of this trip, but it also stood to determine whether or not they would ever leave the court on a mission again.

Thankfully they did not have much longer to wait. Shortly after Kagome's return to the campsite she sensed approaching youki. She stood, scarcely able to contain herself, and Miroku smiled faintly from where he sat at her side. Both the men and women looked to her at the sudden movement, and then to the woods.

Sango emerged moments later, mussed and slightly bruised with a look nothing short of triumphant. The mount she rode atop was not her own, or at least not the one she had rode out on. That one was being led at her side.

The one she rode on now was the neko-mata from before, unharnessed and entirely compliant.

This time Kagome did cry out, rushing to greet her friend. Sango beamed, sliding down off the youkai to meet her with open arms. Kagome clasped her close, babbling something she could scarcely remember in her excitement.

"You did it!" she said. "I knew you could do it!"

"I did it," Sango echoed her, sounding as if she could scarcely believe it herself.

Her eyes shifted over Kagome's shoulder and Kagome released her, moving back a step. Miroku stood just behind her, a faint smile on his lips and his eyes bright on Sango's face.

For a moment Kagome thought he might embrace her, and she saw Sango flush with the same knowledge. He seemed to recall himself, though, merely bowing his head to her with a flourish of his hand.

"Yet again you prove yourself to be a most extraordinary woman, Sango-sama," he murmured.

Sango smiled, possibly happier than if he had embraced her. The others were around them in moments, the women clamoring to congratulate her as the men stared in disbelief at the docile looking neko-mata. Shippou quickly clambered up onto its back, Sango patting its flank so that it would tolerate the boy's explorations. Haru maintained a safe distance, eyeing the youkai's elongated fangs.

After several moments the confusion died down and Sango patted the neko-mata, prompting it to lie down. Her other mount wandered off towards the grazing mounts and Sango turned to the group.

To her credit, there was only the faintest hint of smugness in the curl at the corner of her lips. Gorou, standing at the head of the men, could scarcely meet her gaze.

"How?" he asked lowly, managing at last to look up. "How did you manage it?"

The men all watched her, some of them with burgeoning respect in their eyes as they began to comprehend the magnitude of what Sango had managed all on her own. Sango explained to them all what had happened, her account of the events straight and strictly factual.

She did not bother with exaggeration or self-congratulation. She wanted their respect as a warrior and a leader and she wanted it for what she had actually accomplished, not some overblown version. Besides which she knew the pride of these men. Smothering them with her own pride in what she had accomplished would only breed resentment among them.

She explained how the bakeneko, once forced away from their village, had been impressed enough by her audacity to offer her a challenge. They had remained in that village for centuries, she said, because they were bound by contract to their masters, the descendants of the man who had first managed to subdue and domesticate their great ancestors.

Unfortunately all remnants of that man's bloodline had long ago died out, leaving them bound to the village where their remains rested. Thus they offered Sango the challenge: subjugate the strongest among them and earn the right to be called their master. Fail, they had informed her, and they would not hesitate to kill her and leave her remains for the birds of carrion.

Sango had agreed to their terms and in winning had been able to claim rights as their master. The Northern Bakeneko Clan was now, for all intents and purposes, servant to the Tachibana bloodline in perpetuity. As part of the contract, Sango had asked them to remain near the village until she could summon them to the court. They had agreed readily, elated to have finally been freed from their bondage to a dead line.

Kirara, the neko-mata Sango had bested, had insisted on following her in order to protect her new master. And that, Sango said, was all, from start to finish.

Gorou looked at her for several long moments after she had finished, expression dark with some internal struggle. And then, slowly and deliberately, he got down onto his knees in the dirt and bowed.

"I…apologize," he said with no small amount of difficulty. "I made assumptions. I…I acknowledge you as my superior."

Sango knelt, touching his shoulder to get him to raise his head.

"You wanted proof that your leader could lead," she said. "However it might have upset me, I cannot hold it against you. Although I would recommend that in the future, in the absence of proof, you do not fall back on assumptions."

The show of humility was rather remarkable on her part, and Kagome smiled to herself as she watched the exchange. Her friend was obviously determined to be not only their leader, but their companion, as well.

Gorou managed a small smile. Perhaps change did not come quickly, but it was possible bit by bit.

* * *

They did not linger long after Sango's victory. The following morning they set out towards the clan residences, following the route the taiji-ya had mapped.

With the addition of Kirara as Sango's new mount, Haru was able to have his own to ride. Unfortunately he was so bad at it that he had to be monitored at all times to make sure his mount did not try to wander off on its own with him in tow.

They found that three of the five clan residences in the area had no villages attached. The two villages that they did find, however, proved more than eager to be free of their current lords. Naturally they were wary at the idea of putting themselves in the hands of the court, of all things, but almost anything was an improvement from their current situation and an explanation from Haru seemed to ease their minds somewhat. At length agreements were reached.

The trade ports in Hokkaido proved to be much more of a challenge. By virtue of their function they were much larger than villages and thus determining who to appeal to was a problem in and of itself. The affluent merchants who frequented the ports also ensured that they had enough money to have little need of any outside support.

In the end they chose to address some of the poorer fishing families that lined the coast. Most of them did not share in the relative affluence enjoyed in the ports and might thus be more willing to deal with them. Sango also decided that, though they could not control the trade ports per se, the fishing families could at least be their eyes and ears within them. They were privy to much of what went on there and their knowledge could prove useful.

The families, however, were anything but open to their offers. They had lived their entire lives being treated like dogs by the rich merchants and traders. Their mistrust of even the appearance of wealth ran deep, and their anger found something of an outlet in the appearance of Kagome and her companions.

On their third day in the first trade port this resulted in near disaster. One of the older fishermen, upon Kagome revealing herself to be an emissary of the court, promptly took up the nearest rock he could find and flung it as hard as he could manage at her head.

Haru, nearest to her at the moment, stepped in front of her, the rock striking him squarely in the temple. Blood began pouring from the wound immediately. The group gathered Haru up and beat a hasty retreat, fearful both for his well being and of what Kouga might attempt to do to the old man were he allowed to remain.

Kagome took Haru aside to tend to him as soon as they were far enough outside of the trade port to feel comfortable stopping. Thankfully it proved not to be a particularly deep wound once it was all cleaned up, as Haru insisted the he did not want her to use her powers to help heal it. She was puzzled by the request, but eventually conceded and merely cleaned the cut and packed it with herbs to prevent infection.

He was tense the entire time as she worked on him, fists balled in his lap and back ramrod straight. He kept half-glancing at her before turning hurriedly away. Kagome thought his behavior odd, but made no remark. After all, she hardly knew him. They had not spoken much since he had joined the group as he always proved to be rather stand-offish around her and even though they had grown up together they had never been close. Who was she really to say if he was acting strange?

At last she finished her work, tying the bandages off.

"It's not too tight, is it?" she asked.

He shook his head, not bothering to turn to look at her.

Kagome frowned, moving to stand.

"Alright, then, I will just-"

His hand shot out, catching her wrist before she could rise fully.

"I'm sorry," he blurted, wide eyes meeting hers.

Kagome blinked, the pressure of his hand on her wrist forcing her back down.

"Sorry?" she echoed. "For what? I mean, you protected me. If anyone should be sorry-"

He shook his head hard.

"Not that," he said. "I'm sorry for…"

Haru trailed off, unable to get the words out. Kagome waited, confused, and he drew a deep breath.

"I've…been meaning to say this to you since you came back to the village," he said, eyes falling to his lap. "But I never knew how to say it…or if you'd even wanna hear it, after all this time."

Her stomach tightened warningly as she realized suddenly where this was heading. She opened her mouth in the hopes of cutting it short, but Haru shook his head again.

"Please," he said. "I need to say this, and you deserve to hear it.”

Kagome was silent, and that was as much consent as he needed from her.

"I'm sorry," Haru said again, meeting her eyes solemnly. "I'm sorry for the way we treated you. You never did a thing to deserve it. In fact you did everything in the world a person could do not to deserve it."

Kagome looked down. She bit her lip, swallowing back the memories.

"It wasn't that bad…" she murmured, irked at how weak sounding her voice came out.

Haru tugged at her wrist, forcing her gaze back up.

"You didn't deserve it," he said feelingly. "We avoided you and you knew it, even when you pretended not to. But it wasn't because of you! You were just…you seemed so different from us. Everyone knew what you could do, but no one understood it and we were scared. We were scared when we saw you take out youkai with a touch. It was frightening and we didn't understand why you weren't like the rest of us. But I've thought it over a thousand times since you left. You were protecting us. You were always protecting us, even when you left. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry it took me so long to understand. I'm sorry I was so scared of you."

Kagome felt as if she might choke on the mass of old feelings welling up. She felt like she was shrinking, becoming that small, uncomprehending child again. She loathed the feeling.

"Why are you saying all this now?" she said. "I'd already forgotten. It's already over."

"Not for me," Haru said softly. "I live it over all the time, that look you always had on your face when we'd run away from you. And I…I think you do, too. That's why I wanted to come along. I wanted to make it right. I needed to apologize."

"But what good does it do?" Kagome blurted, unable to keep an edge of bitterness from her voice. "It's done already, isn't it?"

She remembered it, too. She relived it sometimes, too. Their backs growing smaller as they scattered when she came in the hopes of playing with them. Their eyes, dark and wary as they watched her at her lessons with Kaede. She had been so glad when Souta was born, finding at last in him the friend she had always wanted.

Haru blinked, his expression slipping slightly.

"I'd understand if you couldn't forgive me," he murmured. "The village is small, and we made you feel like an outsider at every turn. But…sometimes you look really lonely, Kagome-sama. And…stupid as it sounds, I can't help but think it's us making you look like that. That we made you lonely, somehow. I remember, after while, how you began to run from us instead. Not like we had, but…you'd suddenly decide you had something to do right then, because you didn't want us to run away first. And we were the ones who made you do that. Run away from the people you wanted to be close to because you didn't want to be hurt."

Kagome blinked, her gaze dropping. Those memories she truly had forgotten. At a certain age she had at last realized that the other boys and girls of the village had no intention of playing with her, and she had begun turning from them to avoid seeing her knowledge confirmed. She learned quickly to like her independence, to work well and enjoy working by herself. At least she had always had the great comfort of a family that loved her and Kaede's kindness to return to.

But was a part of her still that child? Still trying to work all alone? Still running to avoid being hurt? Kagome found that she was not sure.

She lifted her eyes, searching his face.

"If not in the hope of forgiveness, what do you do this for?"

"The future," Haru said without hesitation, as if he had thought long and hard on this before. "Mine. Yours. These…these are the kind of things that people get stuck on, right? I don't want us to be stuck for the rest of our lives. I've accepted my guilt. I'm not trying to deny it or forget about it anymore. For better or for worse, it's part of who I am. I wanted…I'd hoped that somehow, by saying all this, I could help you, too. So…I'm sorry, Kagome. I'm sorry I hurt you."

Kagome merely looked at him for a long moment, at a loss. He looked young, so young it was hard to believe that they were the same age. In that moment, though, Kagome felt he might be far, far wiser than her behind that innocent face. Haru flushed, his gaze falling away from hers.

"Sorry," he murmured, shamefaced. "I must sound like a real fool."

Kagome reached out, placing her free hand over the one that still gripped her wrist lightly.

"No," she said softly. "Not like a fool at all."

She offered him a smile that trembled around the edges.

"Kagome?"

They both turned, her blinking rapidly to clear the sheen of tears that threatened to spill over. Kouga loomed over the pair, eyeing the point where their hands were connected. His eyes shifted to Haru, upper lip twitching as if it might pull back into a snarl.

Haru paled, hurriedly extricating his hands from her own and shoving them into his lap as if he might conceal them.

"Did he say something?" the wolf Lord asked, eyes never leaving the boy's face.

Kagome sighed.

"No, Kouga-sama," she said, the moment effectively broken. "We were merely…"

She paused, glancing at the terrified boy.

"We were merely reminiscing over some matters that are well in the past now," she finished, meeting Haru's eyes significantly.

His face brightened, her meaning clear enough to him. Kouga, on the other hand, was less pleased. He reached down and hauled her up by the back of her robes, making a show of taking her hand.

"Well, sounds like you're done here, then," he said, shooting Haru a look that dared him to say otherwise. "I'll just be taking Kagome with me, Fuyu."

"It's Haru," the boy said, but Kouga was already tugging her away.

She allowed herself to be led, not wanting to irritate Kouga further when he and Haru still had potential months together ahead of them. She did shoot Haru an apologetic look. He smiled good-naturedly, shaking his head.

From then on Kouga would watch Haru closely, convinced the boy was after Kagome. Kagome watched him, as well, though she did not suspect him of harboring any special affection towards her. Rather she felt inspired whenever their eyes met, lighter in spirit.

He had not run from his problems or from the truth of himself, good and bad. It gave her hope.

* * *

With time, patience, and extreme care, they were able after several days to get some among the fishing families in the two trade ports to agree to the Tennō's offer. After that they were glad to call it victory enough and move on.

Their next destination was to be back on the mainland, following the Shinano river. Not only was it large and likely to be home to quite a number of villages, it was also home to the Western Ryū Clan, according to Kouga. And as the river extended for such a distance, following it would also take them near to several clan residences.

The journey went well and unremarkably for about a week. The villages along the river were wary, but receptive given some time. They came across three clan residences and managed convince all three of the attached villages to switch their loyalties over to the Tennō.

As day slid slowly into evening at the end of the week, Kouga and Kagome were to be found at the river's edge. Well, Kagome was at the river's edge. Kouga, on the other hand, was thigh deep in the rapid waters, face screwed up in deep concentration.

Kagome looked on, a smile hovering just around the corners of her lips. He had been at it for awhile now, and it was entertaining how seriously he seemed to take the whole thing. She blinked as his hand shot out, breaking the river's surface abruptly.

His hand was still empty when he pulled it back out. He half-glanced back at her, his look slightly sheepish. She could tell he was trying hard to impress her and she smiled to herself, tucking her knees up under her chin as she watched.

It was moments like these with Kouga, quiet and relaxed, when she could really entertain the thought of being with him seriously. It was not that she could picture their future together or what their home might look like or any other number of things she had overheard village women talk about when contemplating a match, but rather just that it was so easy. Being with Kouga was one of the few things in her life free of complications at the moment. He cared for her and she…well, she would-

Another loud splash startled her, making her jump slightly. Kouga, his furs now dripping wet, raised his hand triumphantly to show her the fish he had caught. Kagome laughed softly, uncurling and rising to stand.

"I think you've got enough now, Kouga-sama," she said, gesturing to the pile sitting atop the cloth they had brought to hold them. "We should head back before it gets dark."

"Keh," Kouga snorted, tossing his head. "With me around, you'll never have to worry about the dark again, Kagome."

Still he sloshed his way out of the water, pausing on the very edge of the bank to shake off. Kagome cried out indignantly, hands coming up to shield her face from the spray. She frowned at him and he grinned, shrugging casually. He held the fish he had just caught out to her, practically forcing it into her hands.

"You can have this one," he said. "It's the biggest."

Kagome tried not to grimace, the fish slippery in her hands and still bloody from where Kouga had speared it. She offered him a thin smile.

"Thank you, Kouga-sama," she said. "That's very…thoughtful of you."

He beamed, passing her to gather up the cloth the other fish were sitting atop. The sun was just disappearing beneath the line of the horizon, and for the brief moment before it disappeared from sight the river lit up with the brilliance of a thousand candles being ignited at once. The sight caught Kagome's eye and she paused, watching until it faded.

"Kouga-sama?" she called.

"Hmmm?"

He moved back down the bank to her side and she slipped her fish into the folded up cloth along with the others, wiping the slimy remnants of it off on her hakama absently. She pointed to the river.

"The Ryū Clan live in this river, right?" she asked.

Kouga nodded.

"Yeah. It's the Shinano, for sure," he said.

"Well, we've been traveling along it for weeks without any sign of them," Kagome said thoughtfully. "Where exactly in the river do they live? And how do we go about requesting an audience with them?"

Kouga paused for a moment, blinking as he considered this. At last he shrugged.

"Dunno," he said. "I've never had to deal directly with 'em before. Our territories don't intersect and they're not much involved in youkai clan squabbles, as far as I know."

"Oh," Kagome said, frowning. "Then…what should we do?"

She had studied enough of ryū to know that they dwelt inside the rivers themselves, but little beyond that. Nor has she ever seen one personally, though she knew that they were ancient and supposedly very wise. Beyond that she was at a loss.

Kouga raised his free hand to scratch idly at the back of his head, frowning out at the river. He shrugged once more.

"Why not just call?" he suggested.

"Call?" Kagome echoed, glancing incredulously at him.

He nodded, moving a few steps down the river bank. He cupped his free hand around his mouth.

"Oi!" he hollered at the water, voice loud enough to startle nearby birds into flight. "This is Kouga, head of the Eastern Wolf Clan. I wanna talk to the head of the Ryū Clan!"

Kagome blinked, staring at him in disbelief. Silence reigned in the wake of his shouting, only the trickling rush of the water audible.

Kouga frowned down at the water, obviously having been confident that it would work. He glanced back at her, expression vaguely petulant with disappointment. Kagome choked back a laugh.

"Guess not," he muttered, moving back up towards her.

Kagome laughed aloud then. His pout intensified.

"It…it was a good effort, Kouga-sama," she said placatingly between breathless chuckles. "I just don't think-"

A low rumbling stopped her short. Both turned back to the river, Kagome's eyes widening as she watched the current of the river shift and reverse. Suddenly she could sense it, like a flame sparking to life in her sixth sense. The youki was massive and ancient and somehow wise.

The thing emerged, serpentine, water rolling down off its scales in great falls as it rose from somewhere beyond the deepest depths of the river-bed. Golden eyes turned languidly towards them, white-scaled body twisting slowly to follow, and Kouga shifted to stand protectively in front of Kagome. A stretch of silence ensued in which the three eyed one another, though Kagome and Kouga with much more obvious interest than the ryū.

"You called?" the ryū spoke at last, though somehow without appearing to move its mouth in the slightest.

Its voice was strangely androgynous. Kagome could not have named it as male or female to save her life.

Despite a slight protest from Kouga, she stepped forward and bowed low. She was not exactly prepared to do this right now, but it did not seem as if she had much choice. Better to put her best foot forward while they had managed to gain its attention.

"We are sorry to have disturbed you," she said, straightening and feeling awed all over again at how far up she had to look to meet its eyes. "I am Kagome, a spiritualist and emissary of the court. This is Kouga-sama, head of the Eastern Wolf Clan. We were hoping you might grant us an audience."

The ryū bowed its great head slightly.

"I am inclined to hear you," it said, again without any apparent movement of its mouth. "It has been quite some time since so…novel a method has been used to summon me. And you may call me Mizuchi, if you wish. I believe that is the last name that your people gave to me."

The youkai's eyes crinkled with mirth. Kagome found an answering smile playing on her lips.

"We are pleased to meet you, Mizuchi-sama," she said, bending once more in a bow. "As to the method of summoning, that was entirely Kouga-sama's idea."

She gestured to the wolf Lord, who appeared rather proud of himself as he shot her a triumphant look. She could practically sense the ryū's amusement increasing as it looked on.

"The errand we come on, however, is mine," she continued, turning her full attention back to the looming youkai. "I have come from the court on behalf of the Tennō-sama"

The ryū cocked its head.

"Inu no Taishou?" it asked.

Kagome blinked, shaking her head.

"Ah, no," she said. "The former Tennō-sama passed some years ago, may His soul inhabit peaceful places. His son has since inherited the throne."

The ryū blinked, seeming to take this in.

"My apologies," it said. "We do not often concern ourselves with affairs outside our own."

Kagome nodded in acknowledgement, a twinge of undeniable curiosity taking hold of her.

"Did you know the former Tennō-sama, Mizuchi-sama?" she asked.

The ryū inclined its head in a nod.

"I met him once," it replied. "He said that he sought to bring my clan out into the world. That he wished for humans and youkai to live more closely. He was a willful man, and selfish. But he was very interesting."

Humans and youkai living more closely? It seemed an odd goal coming from a youkai as powerful as she knew Inuyasha's father to have been. Perhaps it had had something to do with Inuyasha himself? Kagome blinked, the thought catching hold of her. She tucked it away for the moment, though, to be turned over at another time.

"But not interesting enough to incline you to come out into the world?" Kagome supplied after a beat.

"We had no reason," the youkai replied. "We have lived through the wars of your world. We have seen rulers rise and fall. We have seen disease and famine. And we have remained unchanged. Your world is full of disorder, and we cannot abide disorder. We have no desire to involve ourselves in it."

Kagome frowned, meeting the large golden eyes thoughtfully.

"I cannot say that I don't understand your desire to remain apart," she said. "But is not the world one whole thing, despite any appearance of difference? I was taught from the time that I was young that there is one shared fate for all beings beneath the kami."

The ryū eyed her, slowly lowering itself until they were almost face to face.

"Explain," it said, moving its head in a gesture that she assumed was meant to urge her to continue.

"Well…" Kagome said, flustered by its obvious interest. "The world…the world is a thing of balance, isn't it? And everything in the world, anything that inhabits it, has weight in that balance. For every death, someone is born. For every tree cut down, another one grows up somewhere in the world. And conflict…conflict occurs when the balance is tipped too far in any direction. But you cannot pretend that your own weight is not a part of the balance, however you might try to hold yourself exempt."

The youkai blinked, its gaze growing thoughtful.

"Your argument is sound," it said after a moment. "I will present it to my clan."

Kagome brightened, encouraged. One more step to go, though.

"Then would you consider putting your clan's support behind his Majesty in His efforts to maintain that fair balance in the world?" she asked.

The youkai frowned. It shook its head slowly.

"I can promise you our neutrality," it said apologetically. "We will never move against the Tennō-sama. But we ryū have remained impartial for centuries. I cannot imagine my clan deciding suddenly to intervene in the affairs of the world without cause, no matter how well-reasoned the argument."

Kagome's face fell.

"I see," she said softly, attempting to conceal her disappointment somewhat.

The ryū moved forward slightly, nudging her with its elongated snout.

"You have a sharp mind," it said. "Surely you must know that change is not a thing that comes quickly, especially in beings as old as us."

Kagome nodded.

"I understand," she managed a bit more firmly.

"I will speak to my clan," Mizuchi offered. "Perhaps, in a century's time or so, they might be convinced."

Kagome raised her gaze, offering the youkai a wry half-smile.

"Be sure to have them seek out my great-great-great-grandchildren, then," she said.

"Our great-great-great grandchildren," Kouga piped up, slinging an arm around her shoulder.

Kagome flushed. Mizuchi blinked, a faint smile curling at the corners of its mouth.

"My congratulations," it said warmly. "It has been a great pleasure meeting you both. Perhaps I, at least, will consider coming out more often. The world seems to have become more interesting since last I took the time to look."

The youkai nodded to them both, its body beginning to coil slowly back into the river behind it. Kagome bowed, calling out a farewell.

It was a loss on her part, but at least they would never support anyone who stood against Inuyasha, either. She turned to Kouga, offering him a smile. She wondered if perhaps she did not give him enough credit.

He grinned back, obviously aware that he had risen in her esteem.

* * *

Several nights later found the group still following the Shinano river. They were having mixed results with the villages arranged around the river, though nothing so violent as what they had encountered in the trade port. With great caution they had been approaching villages attached to residences that they passed, wary lest their errand outside the court be discovered or the villagers get in trouble for speaking with them. In the end, though, they met with success in many of those villages, the villagers promising not to speak a word of it until protection could be sent for them from the Tennō.

On this particular night the companions had settled down to sleep in the thick of a large group of trees, for lack of any better options. As the others settled in to sleep, however, Kagome pulled the bead from inside of her robes. She had resumed her practice of checking every night, unable to quite help it, though she made certain it was for no more than a few moments or so at a time. She settled back against the tree her futon was situated beneath, careful not to disrupt Shippou where he lay beneath the blankets.

The link was particularly hazy that night. Kagome could scarcely make out shapes, though she was rather certain Inuyasha was in his chambers as per usual at this time of evening. He was tense, focused entirely on something, and that was more than enough for Kagome. She was about the close the link off when a voice caught her attention, stopping her short.

"You could take a rest, my Lord," the voice chided softly. "It is not so urgent that it must be finished tonight."

It was Kikyou. Kagome was surprised. The way the hanyou was feeling, she would not have thought the woman was in the room with him. Inuyasha's attention shifted for a moment, but quickly moved back to its original object.

"It's fine," he muttered absently. "I'm not tired."

"Perhaps you are not, but I certainly am of watching you work yourself so hard," Kikyou tried again after a beat of silence, the softness of her voice revealing the sting she had felt at the brush off. "Is it not enough that you spend all day arguing with the Council and searching for governors? Must you spend your nights working on plans for the wedding ceremony? I assure you, my Lord, I would not be offended should you choose to take a moment to rest."

Kagome heard the faint rustling of Kikyou's silks. A hand came to rest lightly on Inuyasha's shoulder and he tensed. He forced himself to relax after a moment, though, bringing his own hand up to squeeze hers once before releasing it.

"It's fine, Kikyou," he repeated. "I just want to get this all done before-"

He cut himself off, realizing with a jolt what he had almost said to her. Kikyou's hand tensed slightly on his shoulder.

"Before what, my Lord?" she said at last, her voice very, very soft.

"Nothing," Inuyasha replied, his stomach sinking. "It's nothing. Maybe…Maybe I am tired."

"…Then I will leave you to rest," Kikyou said, something faintly brittle about her voice. "Good night, my Lord."

The hand left his shoulder. The blurry form of Inuyasha turned, calling after her.

"Kikyou…"

But she was already gone.

Inuyasha cursed, guilt twisting through his gut. Frustrated, he turned back to his work and redoubled his efforts. He was determined. He needed to get this done.

Kagome only looked on for a few more moments before closing the link. She sat for a stretch, merely staring down at the bead cupped in her hands.

She understood. This much she could understand even without being privy to his thoughts. She had half-hoped it herself on several bleak occasions.

He wanted to make sure the wedding took place before she returned.

The thought left her torn between gratitude and pain. On the one hand, it would all be over once she returned. They would be safely separated forever, master and servant.

On the other hand, it would all be over once she returned. Inuyasha would be Kikyou's husband, and she would be...

Kagome shook her head hard, as if she could force out the thought and the sharp ache that accompanied it. She glanced in the direction Kouga had lain down to sleep, realizing with a sigh that he was already sound asleep.

She decided to simply lie down, as well. She could not rely on Kouga to distract her all the time, after all. She would go to sleep and not think about it. After all, whether the wedding happened before she returned or not, dwelling on it was not going to do her any good.

She did not sleep well.

* * *

Following the main body of the Shinano, the companions reached its eventual end where it emptied out into the ocean. From there Sango thought it best to follow the length of the coast, looking into the villages and trade ports scattered along it. The first and best defense should foreign issue ever arise, she reminded them. Kagome, remembering what she had learned when she was last out of the court with Inuyasha, could not have agreed more, though she did not relish the idea of speaking to the people of the trade ports again.

As the point where the river emptied itself into the sea was still relatively far to the north, they began to move southward along the coastline. This would also eventually take them to a point where they could board a ship to Kyūshū, where some of the most important trade ports in all of Japan were. At the same time they would slowly be moving closer to the court in Heian when the time at last came to bring their mission to a close. The idea of returning, though, Kagome preferred not to contemplate. The strange mixture of hope and dread it evoked in her was enough to make her feel ill.

About a week into their travels down the coast they came across something Sango had been looking out for desperately for well over a week-a hot spring, tucked back in a small cave not far from a village they had just visited. All of the taiji-ya, the men included, looked as if they could scarcely contain their joy at the discovery. Trained as they were for combat and travel, they were still creatures of the court born and raised. Kagome traded a faintly amused look with Haru, their lives in the village having accustomed them to bathing perhaps once every several months.

The cave and consequently the spring were rather small, meaning the group had to take turns bathing in pairs and groups of three. Sango, benevolent leader that she was, volunteered to wait until everyone else had finished before taking her turn. Kagome decided to wait with her, seeing as they had had precious little time to speak alone together since the journey had started.

Thus several hours later, as the rest of the group had not been shy about taking their time to fully enjoy the spring, the two women sat together enjoying the warmth of the spring in the muggy comfort of the cave. Kagome had even managed to convince Shippou to bathe with Haru so that it would be just the two of them.

They managed to fritter away an hour in idle soaking and chit chat before they were both so red and overheated that they had to get out. Sango instructed Kagome to sit on one of the cooler rocks in the cave and situated herself behind her, pulling from her neatly folded things a comb she had brought with her.

Kagome sighed contentedly, the small teeth of the comb pricking lightly over her scalp. Sango eased slowly through the tangled mass of her hair, humming softly as she worked. Kagome was so comfortable she was on the verge of nodding off when the noblewoman spoke up.

"So, how exactly do you feel about Kouga-sama?"

Kagome blinked, wide awake in a moment. Almost immediately she recognized the maneuver for what it was. An ambush.

Inwardly she cursed her friend's knack for battle strategy. Lulling her into a false sense of security and making certain that she could not run by getting a firm hold on her. She wanted to glare at the woman, but the angle was a little too awkward for her to manage.

"I warned you that you could not escape having this conversation with me, Kagome-chan," Sango chided lightly, hands busy as she worked at a particularly awful snarl.

And she had been certain to make sure that escape was not an option, Kagome noted wryly. She sighed, figuring she might as well get it over with. Sango had made several other attempts, after all, all of which she had managed to evade by attaching herself to Kouga's side. She knew well enough Sango's determination. She would never give up until she had dragged it out of her.

"I think that…Kouga-sama is a good man," she said slowly. "He's a bit…clumsy perhaps, but he's always done his best to be kind to me. He's also gone out of his way to be helpful to me in this endeavor. He's…strong and he's…well, he's made no secret of the fact that he…cares for me."

She flushed faintly. It was one thing to think all that, but it was entirely another to be asked to articulate it. Sango 'hmmed' softly as she took all this in, moving the comb in one long, smooth stroke through the length of her hair.

"All of which is much to his credit," she replied after a moment. "However, none of it says anything about your feelings. Kouga-sama's intentions towards you are obvious. Yours towards him, however, are far less transparent."

Kagome hesitated, frowning. Here was the crux of the matter. The crux she had been carefully avoiding thinking about for quite some time.

"I suppose I intend to reciprocate his feelings," she said, though the statement came out sounding more like a question than anything.

She found herself a bit afraid of what her friend might think. Little as Kagome knew about the etiquette or process of courtship, she still knew enough to see that she was going about it all in a rather haphazard manner.

Sango paused in her ministrations.

"You intend to?" she echoed quizzically, as if she had not quite heard right. "Meaning that you are not inclined to it naturally?"

Kagome's flush deepened. As she had vaguely suspected, her feelings really were not up to facing the scrutiny, however well-meant, of others. She ducked her head slightly, wincing at the pull on her hair it caused.

"It's not like that, Sango-chan," she said, more defensively than she would have liked. "I don't dislike Kouga-sama. Not at all. I just…"

She trailed off, at a loss. She wanted to feel for Kouga what he did for her. She really, truly did. It would make everything so much simpler. And, bit by bit, she felt that she was getting somewhere with him. Perhaps it was not exactly what she felt for Inuyasha, but it was something.

"I…I think I could be happy with him, Sango-chan," she said softly at last, eyes fixing on her hands as they twisted in her lap. "Given time, perhaps I could…love him. I could live that life."

Behind her, Sango was deafeningly silent for several long moments. Kagome tensed, awaiting her response anxiously.

"It is your life, Kagome-chan," Sango said softly at last. "You do not have to try and convince me of anything."

Kagome felt the older woman release her hair and heard her set the comb aside.

"I do hope, though, that you would be willing to listen to my opinion on the matter," Sango said.

Hesitantly Kagome nodded, not at all certain that she wanted to hear it. Normally her friend would not have felt the need to ask her permission, and everything with Kouga was still so uncertain. Part of her feared that even a word might leave her shaken.

"Kouga-sama is in love with you," Sango said, so bluntly that Kagome nearly flinched. "You say that you could be happy with him? That you could live a life with him? I am certain that you could do both."

"The real question is, is it fair? Is it fair to him to go on with him in the mere hope that you might someday return his feelings? Is it fair to you to try and force your own feelings? To live in the hope that someday you might be truly happy?"

Kagome was silent. Sango placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, squeezing it once before rising.

"I understand that is likely nothing that you wanted to hear," she said softly. "But as your friend I needed to say it. I will leave you to your thoughts, but…please come to me if you need anything. And I know your heart, Kagome. You are the only person I have ever met who would protect everyone, if you could. But you promised me that you would consider your own happiness. So please, truly consider it. "

And then she scooped up her belongings, exiting the cave.

Kagome was left alone with her thoughts. Thoughts that she had been working to avoid for quite some time.

"I don't know," she murmured, knees curling into her chest. "I don't know."

* * *

They continued on down the coast heading southward much as they had before. There was no material change in the group save slightly higher spirits after having been allowed the luxury of a bath. Kagome, however, could not shake the feeling that something had shifted irreversibly.

Outwardly she carried on much the same as before. She rode alongside Kouga and listened to his stories. Occasionally accompanied him when he went out to gather their food for the night. Did not argue when he made less than subtle allusions to their potential future together.

But Sango's words sat like a weight on her heart, and she was forced to weigh everything else against it. Was it fair? Each time she looked at him she felt more uncertain, more suspicious of her own actions. Was it fair?

One day, as they were nearing the large inlet that marked the bend in the coastline and riding high on a few recent successes in their talks with the trade ports, Kouga informed her that the inlet would be their best chance for encountering the ningyō. They inhabited various bodies of water throughout Japan, but the largest clan had taken the sea itself for its residence. He offered to take her to the shore to see if they could not at least catch sight of them.

Kagome agreed. As the sun would soon be setting and the shoreline was not far off, the rest of their companions chose to remain behind and set up their camp for the night. The pair headed off towards the shore.

They ended up having to do a bit of climbing once they reached the shore, a rocky path leading up towards a high cliff where Kouga thought they might have the best vantage point. She had to refuse his offer to carry her up the slope, however, instead merely accepting his guidance as they made their way up.

"You've no idea how to make contact with them?" Kagome asked when they reached the cliff top at last, peering down the dizzying height to where the greenish waters lapped against the base of the cliff face.

Beside her Kouga shook his head.

"They come and go as they please," he said with a shrug. "I've met with them here a few times, but there's not much 'making' them do anything. The ocean's their territory and they don't bother with the land if they don't have to."

Kagome sighed, her gaze trailing out to where the vast waters met the distant horizon.

"I suppose there's not much for it, then," she said. "I can't sense them at all, so I doubt they are anywhere near the shore. Perhaps we'll encounter them later."

Silence fell between them for several moments, though it was not uncomfortable. Clouds slid languidly past, the sun peeking out momentarily from between them as it continued its descent towards the horizon. Several rays slanted through the clouds, ephemerally dazzling as they briefly warmed the murky waters to an emerald green before disappearing once more behind cloud cover.

Kagome stood watching, entranced at the vastness and sense of eternity that overtook her. A chill breeze blew in from over the water, tangling her hair and carrying with it the not-unpleasant scent of brine and distant lands.

"It's really beautiful," she murmured, more to herself than to him.

Kouga looked at her.

"You've seen it before," he said, bemused.

"I know," Kagome replied, recalling with an abrupt pang the week she had spent with Inuyasha on Tsushima. "I just….My village was my whole world before I joined the court. It still surprises me sometimes how big it all really is."

And if her time with Inuyasha was in any way connected to her feeling that the ocean was exceptionally beautiful, it was no one's business save her own. Still she tucked that thought as far back as she could manage, unable to keep herself from shooting a guilty glance at Kouga from the corner of her eye.

He was watching her, his expression thoughtful.

"You wanna…go walk?" he said tentatively, gesturing towards the long strip of shore trailing down and away to their left. "I mean, we can…look at it some more."

Kagome blinked, turning towards him fully. He couldn't quite meet her gaze, his own sliding off to some point just beyond her. After a moment she smiled, a little touched at the thoughtfulness of the gesture.

"Sure," she agreed. "Lead the way."

Kouga blinked, then beamed wide enough to expose his fangs before taking her hand and doing just that.

He led her carefully back down the rocky slope, guiding her steps until they reached the safety of the shoreline. He kept hold of her hand as they walked, their feet sinking in the sand with each step. A pleased grin continued to hover vaguely about his lips, and Kagome was unable to suppress an answering smile at the sight. Inwardly she experienced a twinge, though she was determined to ignore it for the time being.

"Have you been to the ocean often?" she asked to distract herself, pushing back her hair as the breeze blew it in a messy tangle across her face.

Kouga shook his head.

"Only a few times," he said. "I prefer to stick to my territories in the forest. Besides, the ocean smells like shit."

Kagome's smile twisted wryly. Well, she had never really thought him the romantic type.

They walked in silence for a stretch, Kagome's eyes on the distant horizon and Kouga's eyes on Kagome.

"You like stuff like this, right?" he said at length, recalling her attention to himself. "I could take you places, you know. Anywhere you wanna see."

The unspoken 'if you choose me' did not escape her. His eyes, the blue of them still impressive to her after all the times she had seen them, were earnest as they met her own. She knew without a doubt that if she asked it of him, he would do it. That there was little he would not do for her if she asked it of him.

And beyond that she knew in that moment, his hand wrapped firmly about her own, that she could truly be content with him. She knew that everything she had said to Sango was absolutely true. She could be happy if she chose him.

Still, Sango's words would not leave her in peace. Was it fair?

Kagome's expression sunk slowly, her gaze falling away from his. She opened her mouth, not at all certain what would come out.

Shouting and barks of laughter from just down the beach distracted her, the pair turning to look. A group of children, from a nearby village to judge by their rough, ill-fitting clothes, were playing in the sand several feet away from them. There seemed to be something in their midst and Kagome moved forward curiously, a part of her eager to leave the moment behind.

One of the older boys threw something high in the air, the thing they all seemed to be entertaining themselves with, and Kagome caught a glimpse of it just before he caught it once more and tossed it to another boy. It was a rather old, decrepit looking turtle, its body pulled tight inside its weathered shell in terror as it was thrown about. A jolt went through Kagome at the realization and she pulled her hand from Kouga's, running forward a few steps.

"Stop!" she called. "Please stop that!"

The boys paused in their game, turning to stare at her.

"What for?" called the eldest boy in return, scowling. "You can't tell us what to do!"

"It's not that," Kagome said. "I just meant that turtle. You'll scare the poor thing to death, tossing it around like that. Why not just put it back in the ocean?"

"'Cuz then there'd be nothing to throw," drawled the boy currently in possession of the creature as if she must be slow for not realizing it, giving the turtle a leisurely toss. "'Sides, the old thing's half-dead already anyway."

Kagome frowned, opening her mouth to scold them for their callousness, but in the space of a blink Kouga was there. He intercepted the turtle before the boy who had thrown it could catch it once more, holding it just above his head as the boys cried out in protest.

"You should listen to your elders, you brats," the wolf Lord chided. "Besides, there's still something to throw."

And, to Kagome's great horror, he took the nearest boy by the collar with his free hand, hoisting and tossing him into the air effortlessly.

The boy screamed, tumbling head over foot through the air as the rest of them looked on wide-eyed and open-mouthed. Kouga caught him with equal ease, setting him back down on the sand with a smirk.

The boy wobbled for a long moment before tipping over, tumbling head first into the sand. Kagome looked on in wide-eyed disbelief, hand over her mouth as she waited for the boy to start bawling.

He blinked up at the wolf Lord for several long moments, eyes huge as he processed what had just happened. Abruptly a gap-toothed grin stretched the length of his grimy face.

"Do it again!" he cried, scrambling unsteadily to his feet.

"No, me!"

"No, no! Me first, I'm oldest!"

A chorus of cries went up from the boys as they crowded around Kouga, each of them clamoring for a turn.

"Hold on, would ya?" Kouga groused, glancing at the turtle in his hand. "I can do two at a time. Here, catch, Kagome!"

He tossed her the turtle. She fumbled for a moment before catching it, blinking at him in bewilderment.

"Don't worry!" he called to her, taking hold of the collars of the two boys nearest to him. "I do this all the time with the cubs in my clan!"

Kagome could only look on in bemusement as he hurled the two into the air, their excited screams echoing along the darkening beach. At length she shook her head, convinced she would never fully understand boys or the men that they grew to be. At least they had forgotten about the poor turtle.

She walked down to the edge of the waves, squatting down a hand’s breadth from them. She set the turtle down gingerly.

"You're alright now," she murmured to it. "You can go. There's the ocean. Just a little bit more and you're free."

It took several long moments, but the turtle slowly emerged from the haven of its shell. It craned its head around, blinking languidly at her before starting off for the water. It took a bit of time, but it made it to the water and allowed itself to be pulled out by a receding wave. Kagome smiled, feeling vaguely envious as she watched it disappear into the vast waters.

She straightened and headed back up the beach to where Kouga was. He was still tossing the boys in pairs, and he grinned widely as he caught her eye.

"Be careful!" she called, smiling faintly in return.

It was a surprise to see how good he was with children, although she supposed she had no real basis for believing otherwise about him. The only child she had ever seen him interact with was Shippou, and the kitsune was determined to dislike Kouga no matter what.

She wondered absently if he wanted to have children of his own. This, of course, reminded her that if he did intend to, he was likely hoping that she would be involved in the process. Kagome frowned, her cheeks warming faintly.

She had never really given much thought to the idea of having children, though she enjoyed being around them. Mostly because she had never thought that it would be a choice that she would have to make in her life.

Well, from the looks of it, Kouga would make a good father to a child. Hesitantly Kagome tried to picture it, what it would be like to have children with him.

In her mind's eye there was nothing. Nothing at all. No image would form.

The cold breeze blew in from the ocean once more as the last of the color drained from the sky with the vanishing sun. Kagome shivered as it cut through her, wrapping her arms about herself and feeling strangely distant as she stood watching the merry group.

* * *

Kouga took her hand once more as they made their way back from the beach, having finally exhausted the boys and sent them back home. For her part Kagome could only stare at the intertwined appendages, feeling strangely disconnected from the sight.

His flesh was deeply tanned and she could feel the calloused skin of his palms rasping not-unpleasantly against her own. Try as she might, she could not avoid the comparison. Another hand, another sort of sensation entirely.

But it was not unpleasant, being with him like this. Kouga was brave and kind-to her, at least. He had proven himself willing to risk his life for her and had gone to great lengths to aid her even without the definitive promise of reward for his efforts. Perhaps he was not the brightest or most tactful of men, but he loved her. And after all that they had been through, despite the difficulties he sometimes caused her, she felt a certain fondness towards him.

What more could she really ask for?

Still, even all of that did not silence Sango's words inside her head.

Kouga stopped short. Kagome only just managed to keep from running into him, blinking in surprise as she was torn from her thoughts.

"What-?"

The look on his face as he turned to her made her fall silent. There was something determined there in the lift of his chin and the decisive set of his jaw. He looked at her for a long moment, and she could see him working up to something behind his impossibly blue eyes.

Slowly, the gesture more tentative than any she had ever seen from him, he reached out his free hand to touch her face. He met her eyes and she could see him swallow visibly.

Slowly, ever so slowly, he began to lean in. Kagome realized what he was doing. He was giving her ample time to reject the gesture if she so chose, after all.

Slight discomfort crawled just beneath her skin, but she forced herself to remain still. She needed to know. Once and for all she needed to know.

With his face no more than a few scant breaths from hers, Kouga paused. His eyes locked with hers.

"I'm gonna kiss you now," he said, as if clarifying.

Kagome bit back a laugh.

"I know," she said.

And then his lips were against hers. He was warm and surprisingly soft.

The kiss was not insistent, but earnest. Kagome found herself uncertain whether or not she should close her eyes. His eyes were closed. She hesitated, then realized she was focused more on her thoughts than the kiss. She made herself refocus.

He pressed her cheek after a moment, tilting his head as his lips moved searchingly against hers. Kagome felt…warm. That was all. Warm.

Slowly Kouga pulled away. His eyes slid open, searching her face intently.

"…I'm sorry," Kagome said faintly, the words escaping her without thought.

And in that moment, they both knew.

He looked down at her, and there was such hurt in his face that Kagome had to fight back the urge to apologize once more, to tell him she hadn’t meant it.

Her heart sunk as his hand fell from her face. He took a step back from her.

"I…" he said, unable to meet her eyes. "I need to go back and check on my clan soon."

"…Of course," Kagome replied quietly.

He turned and started back towards their campsite. She followed. He did not try to take her hand again.

* * *

The following morning Kouga bid a short farewell to the group. Kagome watched him go, uncertain if she would ever see him again.

But she knew now. It wasn't fair. And the kindest thing she could do for either of them now was to let him move on, even if it meant that she could not.

Still, as she watched him disappear in a cloud of debris, it did not feel very kind to either of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Important Note: This chapter is going to be two parts. I originally only meant for it to be one, but it kind of ballooned beyond my control.
> 
> Mini-History Lesson Cont'd:
> 
> -some notes on bakeneko: These youkai are said to be born from the spirits of domesticated cats who lived to a very old age. They are called neko-mata, however, when the cat is allowed to keep their tail long (many cats in Japan are short tailed even to the present day) and that tail then splits into two. There are some Japanese folk tales that state that bakeneko would remain and haunt the place where their masters had lived for centuries.
> 
> -some notes on ryū: These youkai are inextricably linked to bodies of water, especially rivers. If you've seen Miyazaki's Spirited Away, think of how Haku turned out to be the Kohaku River. This is about the gist of ryū. Also, Mizuchi is the name of one of the ryū mentioned frequently in Japanese mythology. Google it if you're interested, because he's in too many stories for me to summarize them all.


	24. Of Clans and Curses Part II

The man was old and gnarled, bent and trembling like a tree that had never seen sunlight. His skin hung in folds from his bones, too loose from long years of malnutrition, and a grey film had grown over his eyes. The hand that held the rough wooden staff that served as his only support was missing three fingers, and the dragging of one of his legs as he walked spoke of an injury that had never quite healed.

For all of his apparent frailty, though, there was something intimidating in his presence. Animosity, Kagome decided after a moment. It had been some time since she had last sensed such deep-rooted hatred in a person.

"You will leave our village," he rasped, as if it were all he could do to draw enough breath to speak. "You will leave and you will not come back. Make no mistake. We have no qualms in this village with killing court filth. Now go."

The men of the village stepped forward, hefting their makeshift weapons warningly. Looking at them, Kagome knew that they had not the slightest chance of winning should a fight ensue. Not only were they ill-equipped, but relatively untrained, as well.

Still, she also knew that they would not hesitate to fight nonetheless. They had an air about them like dogs that had been kicked a few too many times, desperate and dirty and angry. They would not back down, and she had no desire to fight those who were only trying to protect themselves.

She took a tentative step forward, her hands raised and splayed in a gesture of peace.

"Please, Headman," she said, unwilling to leave without giving it one last try. "If you will only hear what I have to say, I promise you-"

"We will hear no more of your lies, you whore of the court!"

A rusting hoe swung down towards her shoulder, faster than Kagome could blink. She stumbled back a step, but the stroke was caught a hand’s breadth from her face by Miroku's gold-topped shakujou. The rings jangled with the impact and the village man's face contorted wrathfully. The houshi forced him back with an easy shove of his staff.

Sango was at her side in an instant and she could hear the rest of her guard closing rank behind her, poised to defend at any further signs of aggression.

"Are you alright, Kagome-chan?" Miroku said to her, his eyes still trained on her attacker.

Kagome nodded, slightly shaken at the undisguised hatred in the man's eyes as he glared past Miroku at her.

"Get control of your men!" Sango shouted angrily at the headman, her hand hovering just above the hilt of the wakizashi sheathed at her waist. "What honor is there in attacking the unarmed?"

"Honor?" the old man wheezed, though his clouded gaze was fixed upon Miroku. His eyes narrowed, the lines around his mouth deepening.

"Honor," he said again, flecks of spittle escaping him along with the word. "No, no. No, no, no. Honor is a thing of the court alone. Honor allows you to take the crops we grow for your own. Honor allows you to rape and steal our wives and daughters. Honor allows you to set fire to our lands and enslave us in the names of your wars. No, no, no. There is no honor among us. That belongs only to the court. Isn't that right, Miyasu?"

The last seemed to be directed at Miroku where he stood protectively just in front of Kagome. Both Kagome and Sango's eyes turned to him.

Miroku blinked, shakujou lowering slightly. He took a step forward, dark eyes wide as they fixed on the twisted old man.

"How do you know my father?" he called.

Kagome blinked, her eyes turning instinctively to Sango. The taiji-ya's gaze, however, was fixed firmly on Miroku, her brow furrowing.

"Father?" the headman echoed, his chest still heaving to draw enough breath after his tirade. "I'm no fool, Miyasu. I don't forget faces, especially not those of nosy court dogs. Seems you managed to survive that curse, after all. And here I'd hoped it would be the end of you. And you've led even more court scum to us this time. Be grateful I don't kill you where you stand, you miserable mongrel. Go now, though, or I might change my mind."

"Be silent, you miserable old wretch!" Sango snapped, more roughly than Kagome had ever heard her speak before.

She moved to stand at Miroku's side, reaching out to take hold of his arm. His face had gone pale, his hand white-knuckled where he gripped the shakujou.

"Come, Houshi-sama," she said quietly to him. "There is something wrong with the man's mind. He has no idea what he is speaking of."

And then, turning to the group, she called, "We are moving out!"

She tugged at Miroku's arm, pulling him from where he seemed to be rooted as he glared at the headman. After a few increasingly forceful pulls from her he seemed to be brought back to the present, reluctantly following her lead. He cast a dark look back at the ancient man as they went.

The color had drained from him entirely and his jaw was clenched so tightly that the muscles in his cheek jumped. The group closed around Kagome as she followed after Miroku and Sango, covering their retreat.

The armed villagers watched them go until they were beyond the border of the village, but made no further move to come after them. As ready as they were to fight, they knew well enough the odds of their surviving should they press an attack.

The headman stood entirely still as he watched them go, his clouded eyes dark.

* * *

The group gathered about Miroku as soon as they were far enough from the village to stop without fear of attack, although Sango still ordered three of the taiji-ya to stand guard as a precaution. Miroku was silent for several long moments, eyes fixed on the ground. He was entirely still, but his eyes were almost feverishly bright and Kagome could tell he was turning something over rapidly in his mind. The group waited for him to speak, not a one of them daring to say a word.

At last he looked up. He smiled.

"Well," he said, shrugging airily. "It seems that that village was a loss. At least we all came away unharmed."

Kagome blinked, having expected almost any reaction save this. She looked to Sango, but the noblewoman's brow was furrowed as she looked at him. The entire group was silent for several moments, at a loss.

"The old headman…he seemed to know your father, Houshi-sama," Noriko ventured at last. "And he said something about a curse, I think? Have you any idea what he meant?"

Miroku looked to the woman, and for the briefest of moments there was a darkness in his expression that Kagome had never even suspected of him. In the space of a blink it was gone, though, replaced by light bemusement. He shook his head.

"The man did not appear to be in his right mind," he replied. "And my father went to a great many places in his journeys over the years. Likely the man encountered him at some point, and the rest was born from the chaos of his own mind. Though I will admit I was a bit rattled to hear him speak so harshly of my father. He was an exceptionally kind man."

"That old man did not seem to have much fondness for anything having to do with the court," Gorou put in, shaking his head. "After all, he nearly had Kagome-sama killed. Likely he had no idea what he was even saying about your honorable father, Houshi-sama."

Save Sango and Kagome, the rest of the group nodded and murmured in agreement. Sango, however, was eyeing Miroku critically, and Kagome knew that she thought there was something else going on with him beyond what he was allowing them to see. Kagome felt much the same. Miroku's reaction back in the village…he rarely lost control of himself like that. Kagome could not believe that it had all simply been a misunderstanding.

"I move that we start out, then," Sango said suddenly, her eyes trained on Miroku's face. "I cannot see this village meeting any further attempts from us with anything save violence. Best that we move on to avoid wasting our efforts or being attacked while we retreat."

Miroku's eyes darted to her. He said nothing, though, as the rest of their companions voiced their agreement. At last he nodded.

"A wise decision, as usual, Sango-sama," he said. "As night is coming upon is rather quickly, though, would it not be prudent to start out again in the morning? I doubt that they will be so bold as to come after us with such limited weaponry, and our guard will be more than enough to drive them off should they attempt anything."

Sango looked at him for a long moment, considering. The suggestion was a reasonable one. The day was rapidly declining into evening, and they would have to travel by night if they set out now. Generally they tried to avoid that, as it left them much more vulnerable to surprise attacks than if they travelled by day. Miroku met her gaze evenly, his expression blithe.

"You are right, Houshi-sama," she said at last. "We will spend the night here. It will be safer to set out first thing in the morning. Start setting up camp, everyone. I will catch tonight's meal."

The taiji-ya, along with Haru and Shippou, got immediately to work, the routine of camp set-up so familiar to them by now that they could have done it in their sleep. Miroku offered Sango a small smile before moving off to attend to his own duties.

Sango looked after him as he went. Kagome moved to the woman's side.

"What's going on, Sango-chan?" she asked quietly, hoping the houshi's childhood friend would understand what exactly had just gone on in that village.

Sango shook her head, her eyes troubled.

"I do not know," she said softly. "Or, at least, not entirely. Miyasu-sama, Houshi-sama's father, was taken from him abruptly, when Houshi-sama was yet rather young. No one ever really understood what had happened. Not long before the throne war he had left the court, and in the chaos of the time no one had the opportunity to ask him why or what he intended to do."

"When he returned to the court several months later, he…he was too weak to explain what had happened. He clung to life for a few days before he passed. His wife followed not long after him. Houshi-sama took up his position. I…I have tried to broach the subject with him on several occasions, but he refuses to speak about his father. This is the most I have heard him say about Miyasu-sama in years."

Kagome blinked, remembering suddenly that Midoriko had once mentioned to her almost exactly that. She glanced towards him, watching as he went about warding the perimeter of the campsite as per usual.

"Do your really think it's as Miroku-sama said?" Kagome murmured to her friend. "That the village's headman is merely out of his mind? I sensed it in his aura, too. It felt…off. Something inside of that man was deeply sick."

"Perhaps," Sango said, frown deepening. "But you saw it, too, didn't you? Houshi-sama's face when that man called him by his father's name."

Silence fell over the pair. Both felt it. There was something that Miroku was hiding, even from them.

"I am going to go hunt," Sango said at last. "Keep an eye on him for me, alright? You know as well as I do that if something really is the matter, he will try to deal with it on his own."

Kagome nodded.

"But that's what we're here for, isn't it?" she said softly, offering her friend a small smile.

Sango returned it with a faint one of her own before disappearing into the darkening woods.

* * *

It had been over a week and a half since Kouga had left the group. As planned, they had continued their trek down the coast towards Kyūshū since his departure. Thankfully he had also marked the map with the location of the remaining Tanuki and Oni Clans before leaving, meaning that Kagome and her companions would be able to find them even without his assistance.

This, however, was little consolation to Kagome. She had turned everything over time and time again in her head since he had left, and each time left her feeling lower than the last. Not only had she lost a good and loyal friend, she could not escape the realization that she had used Kouga very poorly indeed. She had sought to escape her feelings for Inuyasha through Kouga, never stopping to consider how unfair it was to Kouga when his own feelings towards her were so sincere.

Her fear of her own feelings, of the pain they caused her and stood to cause others, had made her selfish, and Kagome hated herself for it. She had spent several sleepless nights wondering how she could possibly make it up to him. A letter. Some gift to his clan. Anything. She always came back to the thought, though, that the greatest kindness she might be able to do him at this point was to never appear before him again. And she knew it was less than the punishment she deserved to bear that guilt for the rest of her life.

To top it all off, she was right back where she had started. Unable to avoid any longer the fact that she was in love with the sovereign of her nation and terrified at the thought that the feeling would never go away. She did not know what to do with herself.

The best she could come up with was to avoid thinking about it or what was to come when it came time for her to return to the court. Instead she threw all of her focus back into the mission, determined that she would at least do this right.

This latest village that they had come across on their way down the coast had, in appearance at least, seemed like any other before it. Small and run-down. Not even a connection to a residence to make it particularly remarkable.

The ferocity the villagers had met their appearance with, however, was something unusual. And then there was whatever had occurred between Miroku and the headman.

Kagome glanced at the man, seated amidst a ring of taiji-ya and listening politely if not avidly to whatever one of the men was saying. Sango had since returned and the evening meal was now over, but he had yet to even glance back towards the village. Watching him, Kagome had begun to question her own suspicion. Perhaps he had simply been shaken at the mention of his father's name coming from that vile man's mouth.

Sango seemed to have lost some of her former certainty, as well. Though she still watched him from her place across the campsite as she examined the blade of her wakizashi for any nicks or signs of dullness, some of the alertness had gone out of her frame.

Slowly the group settled down to sleep, though a pair remained to guard the campsite in case of attack. As per usual, Kagome waited until the others appeared to be sleeping before pulling the bead from her robes. Despite everything, she could not bring herself to give the ritual up.

She was just about to open the link when movement caught her eye. Whoever it was was too far from the fire to be clearly visible, but Kagome could make out a shadow as it rose up on the edge of the camp. She hesitated, glad she herself was far enough from the fire to avoid being seen clearly. Likely it was just one of the group getting up to go relieve themselves.

A moment later, though, another figure rose. This one Kagome could make out clearly. It was Sango, hair loose down her back in a messy jumble from where she had lain down to sleep. Her eyes were sharp as they reflected the flames, though, no fog of slumber in them. She moved slowly to trail after the shadow figure as it disappeared into the surrounding woods.

Kagome moved slowly off of her futon, careful not to disturb the sleeping kitsune there. She scooped up the bow and quiver of arrows that lay beside it, carefully avoiding the ring of firelight as she moved to follow her friend. She was not certain what was going on, but no one else appeared to have noticed anything was amiss. She was not about to leave Sango to deal with whatever it was all on her own.

By the time she caught up to Sango, Sango had caught up to the shadow figure. It took a few moments for Kagome's eyes to adjust fully to the darkness of the woods, but when they did she realized exactly why the noblewoman had felt the need give chase.

It was Miroku.

Sango had moved to block his path, her stance set determinedly. Miroku appeared to be at a loss, tense as she brought him up short. Kagome checked her advance, keeping herself concealed just behind the trunk of a nearby tree. She wanted to see how this was going to play out before she decided whether or not she should step in.

"You cannot go back there on your own," Sango snapped, though her voice was low enough to keep it from carrying back to the campsite. "Have you any idea what they would do to you if they caught you? And trying to sneak out, of all things-"

"Sango-sama," Miroku said, a faint edge that Kagome could just barely pick up on in his words. "I assure you that you have misunderstood my intentions. I merely intended to…ah, relieve myself before going to sleep. I apologize for waking you, but-"

"And you needed to go this far from the campsite to relieve yourself?" Sango countered. "You needed to make certain the guards did not see you by waiting until they were on the other side of the campsite?"

"I assure I did not intentionally avoid the guards," Miroku said, tone growing more strained. "And I thought it would be courteous-"

"Don't lie to me, Miroku!" Sango snapped, fists balling at her sides as she leaned into his space insistently. "I know you! Did you honestly think I would not notice that something is wrong? I know you do not like talking about your father, but if you would only tell me-"

"It is not your concern."

Sango froze mid-sentence as the low words cut across her. Miroku's expression had lost any pretense of confusion or amusement. He was serious now, eyes unwavering as they met hers.

"W-what do you mean, 'not my concern'?" Sango said, recovering herself after a moment. "Of course it is my concern. As…as your leader and your friend-"

"It is my affair," Miroku cut across her coolly once more. "And mine alone to settle. Go back to bed, Sango-sama. I will return by morning and we can all resume the mission as usual."

He made to move around her, but Sango stepped back into his path once more. She glared up at him, eyes bright with equal parts hurt and anger at his casual dismissal.

"If you want to go back there, you will go through me," she said fiercely.

Miroku looked down at her, jaw clenching. She met his eyes challengingly with her own, and a tense moment stretched silently between them.

"You know I will not fight you, Sango," he bit out, moving once more as if to go around her.

She shifted, blocking him again.

"Then you will not go," she said.

"I don't want you involved in this!" Miroku snapped, and Kagome flinched where she hid.

She could not recall ever having heard him raise his voice before.

"Why?" Sango shot back. "Haven't I told you everything? Haven't I shared every minuscule, piddling problem I have ever had with you? Why must you always try to do everything on your own? This is obviously important enough to you for you to risk your life! So don't you tell me, Miroku, that it is not my concern!"

Miroku was glaring in earnest now. Even in the darkness Kagome could see the muscle tick in his jaw as he fought to keep from losing his temper.

"Move, Sango-sama," he said, very lowly.

"I won't," Sango returned stolidly, shaking her head. "Just as you have always made my fights your own, your fights are my fights. I do not know why you are determined to try and shut me out, Miroku, but I will not stop trying. I will not give up. I will be your faithful friend, whether you want me or not."

He was silent, some of the tension easing from his frame. A sigh escaped him, his eyes sliding shut as he shook his head.

"Please, Sango, you do not understand-"

"I think we both understand well enough."

Kagome emerged from behind her tree, unable to keep herself back any longer. Sango and Miroku turned to her, surprised.

"And I have to second Sango-chan, Miroku-sama," Kagome said, moving to stand beside the woman. "You would never allow me to go off on my own to do something so dangerous. What sort of friends would we be if we allowed you to?"

Sango smiled faintly at her. Miroku looked from her to Sango and back, at loss. He half-shook his head, lips parting to say something when another voice cut across his.

"Sango-sama! Sango-sama! Where are you?"

The three turned, startled by the soft calls coming from the campsite. Sango grabbed Miroku's arm, dragging him forcibly after her. Kagome hurried after the pair, a pang of worry shooting through her.

Nothing appeared to be wrong at the campsite. Most of the taiji-ya were still asleep, as were Haru and Shippou. The only difference was the figure who stood beside Noriko, the one who had been calling for Sango.

It was a woman that Kagome did not recognize. From the looks of her tattered clothing and gaunt, dirt-stained features, Kagome guessed that she was one of the villagers. It was difficult to tell what her age might be, but she did not appear to be very old. Her head was bowed, her shoulders hunched and her hands clasped tightly together as she hovered uncertainly at Noriko's side.

"What is it?" Sango said as she approached, eyeing the stranger. "Has something happened?"

Noriko shook her head, gesturing to the woman. If possible, the woman's shoulders hitched up higher.

"This woman came to us while we were on guard," Noriko said. "She says her name is Hisoka-san, and she is requesting an audience with Houshi-sama."

"With me?" Miroku said.

The woman's gaze flitted up to his face for the briefest of moments before darting away. She half-bobbed in an awkward bow.

"I am sorry to have disturbed you all," she murmured hastily.

"For you to have come so late and alone, I assume it must be important," Miroku said gently, taking a step towards her. "Please, let's go over here. We can speak in private-"

"You will not," Sango broke in, turning a sharp look on him. "Please return to your post, cousin. We will hear her out and then escort her back."

Noriko nodded and moved to do so, though she shot a curious look back at the group as she went. Miroku scowled at Sango, placing a hand on the village woman's arm. She flinched slightly.

"With all due respect, Sango-sama, Hisoka-san requested an audience with me," he said. "I see no reason for you and Kagome-sama to-"

"I do not think so," Sango cut in. "Anything that needs to be said can and will be said in front of Kagome-sama and myself."

Miroku frowned at her, on the verge of arguing the point. A glance at Hisoka, her anxious fidgeting increasing by the moment, stopped his tongue. He sighed, too eager to hear what it was the woman had risked so much to come tell him to waste any more time trying to budge the stone wall that Sango had effectively become. He gestured to a corner of the campsite a short distance from where the others were sleeping.

"At least let us move to where we will not be overheard."

Sango nodded, and the three moved. Hisoka shuffled after them, her gaze still fixed on the ground.

"Please, speak freely, Hisoka-san," Sango said softly. "You need have no fear of us."

Hisoka glanced up at her from beneath her lashes. Sango offered her a small smile, and some of the tension went out of her thin frame. She nodded, more to herself than to them.

"I was afraid to come until now," she began, her voice very, very quiet. "One of the other villagers might've seen me if I'd come during the day. They would never let me return if they thought I'd had dealings with courtiers. But I had to come."

She fell silent, hands twisting anxiously together once more. She seemed to be working up to something, and the three waited silently for her to get up her nerve. At last she managed to raise her gaze, meeting Miroku's.

"My village and the headman…they're sick," she murmured. "They'll never be able to forgive the courtiers for what they've done to them. They've hated them for too long. But Miyasu-sama…your father once did me a great kindness. I thought…if I could repay it somehow…"

She trailed off, her gaze falling once more as she appeared to lose whatever small amount of spirit she had mustered. Miroku frowned, shifting a bit impatiently. His air had grown much more solemn at the mention of his father.

"What exactly happened here?" Kagome asked, curious and hoping to start her talking again.

The woman shook her head helplessly, shrugging.

"Everything," she said, and there was such a deep resignation to the word that Kagome felt her heart sink. The woman's shoulders hunched higher as if to ward off the memory.

"Our village is situated between two court residences, as you likely know," she continued. "The clans who own the two residences have long disputed the boundaries of their lands. And the land our village sits on, it is…it was very fertile. Both clans wanted it as part of their holdings."

"They fought on our lands for years. They used our men as soldiers. They raped the women, when the men refused to fight anymore. Hundreds of us died in the battles. And when the battles were over, the land was nearly ruined. Still, the courtiers salted the earth to make certain neither side could ever use it. More of us died of starvation. There's nothing left for us on this land now, but we've nowhere else to go. Or…perhaps we can't go. Misery binds us here. I'm not sure we could go if we wanted to. I'm not sure things would be any better if we did."

She shrugged, the movement a small jerk of her bony shoulders. Kagome, Miroku, and Sango stood, silent and cold with horror. Kagome could barely comprehend what she had heard. That the courtiers could use other people in such a way, that they could absolutely devastate people who had done nothing to them, unchecked by either laws or their own consciences…She felt cold all over.

"Why?" Miroku managed at last. "What could possibly move you to risk coming to me?"

His entire demeanor had shifted. Kagome saw her own revulsion reflected in his face, features pallid in the faint light that the moon and the stars offered. Beside him Sango's head was bowed.

The woman met Miroku's eyes, the ghost of a smile long past hovering around the corners of her lips.

"Your father gave to me the happiest years of my life. The only happiness I ever knew," she said quietly, bittersweet nostalgia running through her words. "I owe Miyasu-sama a great debt. I wanted to at least offer my thanks to his son. I don't own much, but if there is anything that I can offer you, consider it yours."

Miroku's face grew even more solemn. He hesitated, casting a sidelong glance at Sango. He did not want them there for this, but he knew there was no getting rid of them now.

"I need to know what happened to my father here," he said at last, eyes almost feverishly bright as they met Hisoka's. "Please. It is the greatest service you could ever render me."

The woman blinked at him, having expected almost anything else. She gave a small nod.

"I don't know everything," she said. "But I know as much as anyone else in the village. Miyasu-sama came here several years ago. He said he was tracking some youkai, and that he had followed it to our village. Because he was from the court, though, the headman nearly had him killed. Miyasu-sama escaped before they could hurt him, though. I…I met him along the path outside the village. I had been out in the forest looking for herbs. My little girl was very sick. I wanted to heal her, but I've no skill or training in the healing arts. Miyasu-sama offered to see her. I was desperate. My husband was killed in the fighting, and she was the last family I had left in the world."

"So I snuck him into the village under the cover of night and hid him in my hut. He healed my Aiko and asked me if I had seen a strange man enter the village recently. I told him I hadn't. He thanked me…thanked me, of all things, and crept out into the village in search of the man."

She hesitated, frowning suddenly. Her eyes slid shut against some memory, her hands twisting together.

"I'm not sure if he found what he was looking for," she murmured, shaking her head. "But he must have found something. I found him in the morning, lying just outside my hut. There didn't seem to be any wounds on him, but he was dazed and weak. He could barely say anything that made sense, except that he had to get back to the court. I begged him to stay with me and rest for awhile. He looked too weak to make any sort of journey."

"But he refused no matter what I said. He made his way out of the village, and the headman saw him go. He left him alone, though, as he looked so sick and weak. The headman said it was a curse that had been laid on him for daring to enter our village. He laughed…he laughed and said he deserved it. He's a…he's such a hateful man. I felt awful, but I couldn't leave Aiko to go after him. I never knew if…he made it back to the court."

She peered up at Miroku from beneath her lashes, a timid question in her eyes. Miroku had gone rigid, his entire frame wound so tight it looked as if he might snap at any moment. Pain and bitter relief mingled strangely across his features, his eyes falling shut for a long moment.

Watching him, Kagome felt her heart sink. She took an instinctive step towards him. At his side Sango reached out, wide eyes trained on his face as she laid a tentative hand on his arm.

"He did," Miroku managed at length, eyes sliding open. "He managed to return. He passed several days after that, though."

Hisoka's face fell, her gaze sinking once more. She bit down on her lip.

"I'm so sorry," she murmured with quiet feeling. "Your father was one of the only good people I have ever met."

"Don't apologize," Miroku said, though he could not look at her. "You've given me a greater gift than you know in telling me all this. I would ask you for one more, though."

Hisoka blinked up at him, nodding without hesitation.

"Of course," she said. "Anything."

"Is there anywhere, any place at all, that you can think of that he might have gone that night?" he asked. "Any place in or around the village that seems strange or remarkable in any way?"

She frowned, her brow furrowing as she thought for a moment.

"There is…one place," she said. "It's just outside the village. It used to be part of it, but everyone moved away from it after what happened there."

"Happened?" Sango echoed, finally managing to tear her gaze from Miroku's face.

Hisoka nodded.

"A woman lived in that hut with her little son," she said. "Her name was Fuyumi, if I remember right. She was very beautiful, but strange. No one ever knew who the father was to her child, so the villagers were always wary of her. The little boy, Onigumo, I think his name was, was beautiful, too, but he was trouble. He sometimes stole from the other villagers, and he was always fighting with the other children."

"In one of the battles between the courtiers, nearly half the village was burned down. Fuyumi's hut caught fire, too. The men managed to put out the fires before her hut burned down, but there was no sign of Fuyumi or her boy. Someone said they thought they'd seen her being dragged off by one of the courtiers. It wouldn't have been the first time one of them had taken one of the village women to keep as a mistress."

"No one was ever sure what happened to the boy. Likely he was killed when they took his mother. But several years later a darkness settled over the hut. People who went near it began to feel ill and frightened. There was talk of tearing it down, but no one ever had the nerve to do it. Those who lived near it simply abandoned their huts and built new ones further away."

Kagome, Miroku, and Sango exchanged a look. If that description did not positively reek of a youkai's nest, then nothing did.

"If you'd like, I could show it to you," Hisoka offered timidly, though the way her shoulders tensed betrayed her deep reluctance.

"No," Miroku said. "You have done far more than enough for me tonight. If you will wait, though, we can at least escort safely back to the village and your daughter. We will go to look into the hut while we still have the cover of night to conceal us."

He looked to Sango and Kagome for confirmation, resigned at this point to the fact that they would try to come along no matter what and unwilling to waste any more time in arguing with them. Sango and Kagome nodded, both more than willing to do whatever it took to aid their friend.

Hisoka offered them a feeble smile.

"That's alright," she said. "If you don't need me, I'd rather go back on my own. There's…there's no one waiting for me. Disease took Aiko several years ago. But the years your father gave me with her were the best of my entire life."

She bowed a bit awkwardly to them all before turning and starting off silently back into the woods towards the village.

"Wait," Kagome called after her, though the word was half-strangled by the sudden tightness in her throat.

The woman did not so much as pause, shuffling slowly away into the darkness of the night. The three stood watching her in silence, the weight of the world seeming to settle over them.

* * *

Sango merely had to grab her weapons and taiji-ya gear before they could set out. They informed the pair on guard that they would return by morning, ordering them to continue to keep watch until then. The rest of their companions they left sleeping. Miroku was already reluctant enough to allow Kagome and Sango to accompany him, besides which stealth would be much easier to accomplish with fewer people.

They took a different path than the one they had taken when retreating earlier, moving instead beneath the cover of the trees and aiming towards the outer edge of the village. When they were at last forced to leave that cover, they made certain to skirt as far around the dilapidated huts as possible.

The village was silent, eerily still beneath the pale light of the moon. They came around to the far side of the village, opposite where they had first entered late that afternoon. At first it seemed there was nothing to be found, but pressing on a little further brought them to several huts that sat at a strange distance outside the village itself.

All of the huts were dilapidated, walls and roofs crumbling in on themselves after years of disuse, but only one still bore the scorch marks of a fire on its remains. Jyaki permeated the air around it like a tangible thing, and Kagome's stomach roiled unpleasantly as they approached.

"It's awful," she murmured, eyeing the crumbling structure. "What in the world could have happened to make it like this?"

"Even I can feel it," Sango said, rubbing absently at one arm as goose bumps rose along the flesh there. "It feels…heavy. Dark."

"I cannot sense past the jyaki," Miroku said, eyes hooded as he peered into the darkness of the hut. "What about you, Kagome-chan?"

Kagome shook her head.

"It is too thick in the air," she replied. "I can't sense anything inside the hut."

Miroku frowned, eyes growing thoughtful as he examined the crumbling thing. His gloved hand flexed almost unconsciously at his side once more, and Kagome wondered absently if that had always been a habit of his and she had simply never noticed it before.

"I want to go in alone," Miroku said after several moments.

Sango's gaze snapped towards him.

"Not a chance!" she exclaimed. "We did not come all this way just to stand and wait outside!"

"There is no way of knowing what is in there," Miroku said, straining to speak levelly to her. "You will both be much safer if you simply wait outside."

Sango scoffed, eyeing him disbelievingly.

"Do you honestly think me so incompetent?" she said. "I have trained for years, and I am more than aware of what might be in there. You honestly think I would decline to help you simply because there happened to be some risk involved?"

"You would if you had any sense," Miroku said, shooting her a sharp glance as he at last began to lose his hold on his temper. "This is a risk you do not have to take. It is my concern and-"

"Again with that?" Sango bit out. "Didn't I already tell you-!"

"Please, stop, both of you." Kagome cut in, stepping between the pair. "If you start in here you risk waking the villagers and getting us chased out before anyone can go anywhere. Besides, Miroku-sama, you can't possibly expect us to wait outside while you walk into the kami only know what on your own."

Miroku looked from Sango to her and back again, jaw clenched tight. His dark eyes were bright with his obvious frustration, and not for the first time Kagome wondered what it was that he was so desperate to keep them both out of.

"Fine," he said after a moment, the word escaping him in a reluctant huff. "But hear me now, both of you. From the moment we step foot in there, you are to listen to anything I tell you. If I tell you to run, you run. No questions. Do you understand me?"

Kagome and Sango exchanged a look. It was a rather strict condition to impose on them. Still, this was to do with Miroku's father, in the end, and the arguing would only continue if they did not agree…

After a moment both women nodded. Miroku gave a single, short nod in return, not satisfied by far but not willing to waste any more time on it, either. He gestured them both forward toward the hut.

"Come then," he said shortly. "Follow my lead."

The pressure on Kagome's spiritual sense increased with every step they took towards it, and she had to grit her teeth against a wave of nausea that swept through her. Miroku hesitated for just a moment on the threshold, paling in a way that told her he felt much the same, but quickly took the first step and disappeared inside. Sango and Kagome stepped through just behind him, both women's hands hovering warily just over their weapons of choice.

Kagome gagged, her knees nearly buckling as they were enveloped in the stifling darkness of the hut. If the feel of the jyaki had been powerful outside the hut, it was enough to overwhelm her inside. She drew a shaky breath as her eyes slowly adjusted, fighting to remain standing.

"Miroku-sama?" she called, scarcely able to make out the outlines of her friends in the darkness. "Sango-chan?"

"Here," she heard him call, followed by several hacking coughs.

She could tell he was close, but had no idea where. She felt disoriented, her head spinning as the jyaki and unnatural darkness pressed in on all sides.

"Over here," Sango called, sounding slightly better off than the pair of them.

Without a strong spiritual sense she was much less susceptible to it, though the feel of the jyaki likely registered to her as a sense of deep dread and seemingly irrational fear.

"I cannot sense anything. The jyaki is too thick," Miroku called, voice low with frustration.

"Hold on," Kagome called, an idea occurring to her.

She raised her right hand, concentrating energy into it until a small blue orb of her power formed in the cradle of her palm. She breathed a sigh, the jyaki in her immediate vicinity dissipating.

In the pale light it cast she saw Sango and Miroku's faces illuminated, poised tensely a short distance from her. They met her eyes in the dim light. Almost as one the three turned to peer into the further reaches of the hut.

They froze.

Consuming the small space inside the hut was a web, strands hanging all throughout in intricate loops and whorls. There appeared to be no other movement inside the hut save their own, but tangled in the center of the web a woman hung suspended. She appeared to be human.

Her eyes were closed, her arms folded over her chest. She was beautiful, her skin paler than death and her hair, tangled around various threads of the web, long and dark in the style of the court. An elegant juni-hito was draped over her slender frame, blood red in color and embroidered with deep accents of purple. She did not stir in the slightest.

"By the kami," breathed Sango, half taking a step forward. "Is she alive?"

Miroku shook his head, his eyes roving the room in search of signs of anything else.

"I can't tell," said Kagome, frowning. "I can't sense anything with all of this jyaki…let me just…"

She took a few cautious steps forward, carefully maneuvering around the hanging bits of web. She came to stand just beneath where the woman hung, holding the glowing orb high so that her fine features were thrown into high relief. Her chest did not move to draw breath, and Kagome could sense no spiritual force from her even at such a close distance.

"She's dead," Kagome called back to her companions.

"But who is she?" Sango asked. "And how in the world did she come to be here, like this?"

"There must be something else," Kagome heard Miroku mutter behind her. "Something…"

She could hear him move, searching the corners of the small room. Kagome frowned, lifting her light to scan slowly over the body. She heard Sango come up to stand just behind her.

"Wait," the noblewoman said, taking hold of her wrist to hold the light in place.

The light hovered just over the woman's folded hands. Something appeared to be clasped between them, only just visible between her interlocked fingers. Kagome heard Sango murmur a plea for the woman's pardon before the taiji-ya reached out, prying the thing as carefully as she could from her rigid hands.

Kagome murmured her own plea for pardon to the woman's soul, wondering how she had ended up here and like this. She appeared to be of the court and Kagome could not begin to imagine how she had ended up in this village, of all places.

Sango managed to pull the thing free at last, the web swinging slightly with the force of her final tug. She held it up for them both to examine, turning it over in her hands.

A faint humming caught Kagome's attention suddenly. Beside her, Sango tensed. The sound grew louder, building into a full-fledged buzzing. Miroku was at their sides in an instant, shakujou raised.

"What it that?" he said, eyes scanning the dark corners of the room.

In the faint glow of Kagome's light nothing appeared to be moving.

"I don't-"

The miko paused mid-sentence, a flicker of movement catching her eye in the darkness. Slowly she lifted her light higher.

She froze, hardly daring to draw her next breath.

Not a sliver of the thatching that composed the roof was visible. Instead there were hundreds of saimyōshō, clustered so tightly together as they clung there that they formed a wall in and of themselves. Some of them were stirring as Kagome's light washed over them, wriggling agitatedly and climbing all over one another.

One detached itself from the rest, its red eyes sliding open as it came to hover over the web. It stared at them for a long moment, simply hovering there. And then the rest poured down, detaching themselves in a swarm and a roar of noise.

They dove through the tangles of the web, filling the room and falling en masse upon the three.

"Do not let them touch you!" yelled Sango, unsheathing her wakizashi in one smooth move and slicing through four of the youkai in one swing. "One sting and you will be dead before morning!"

Miroku swung his shakujou in a wide arch, forcing the saimyōshō away from himself and Kagome. Kagome, not daring to extinguish her light and draw her bow lest she leave her friends helpless in the dark, stuck close to their sides and called out to them when the youkai came too close.

The three stuck tight to one another's sides as the youkai swarmed and dived at them, forcing them back step by slow step. Sango had to turn to cut a path for them through the low-hanging web, hacking through it one moment before she had to swerve to slash at several youkai that were coming too close to her. Several strands of the severed web fell in a tangle over Kagome's shoulders and hair, sending a strange jolt through her. She ignored it, though, as they were almost to the entryway of the hut.

Miroku hesitated just on the threshold, stopping dead in his tracks.

"What are you doing?" Sango called to him. "There's too many of them in here! We have to get out!"

Miroku shook his head, face set determinedly.

"You both go!" he called back. "I will follow after you!"

Kagome turned wide eyes on him, flinching as he knocked back a saimyōshō mere breaths from the tip of her nose.

"You can't!" she cried. "You'll be killed if you stay in here alone!"

"I just need a little bit more time!" he said, shaking his head hard. "You both promised to obey me, so-"

He cut himself off, ducking to dodge a youkai flying in low. Kagome turned desperately to Sango, exchanging a wide-eyed look with the woman. Sango bit her lip, her eyes bright as her mind worked furiously to try and figure something out.

"Miroku!" she called desperately.

But he merely shook his head again, motioning for them to leave with a look that brooked no argument. He took a step, swinging wildly as he made to move beyond the swarm and back into the hut. Kagome's free hand shot out after him, just missing the back of his robes. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a flash of movement.

Something flew into the midst of the swarm, and the room was filled with a low hissing noise. Smoke, thick and acrid, seemed to billow up out of nowhere, expanding rapidly. Miroku blinked, coughing and stumbling back a step.

Sango lunged for him, catching hold of his robes, planting one foot, pivoting, and tossing him with all her strength through the entryway. Miroku, caught entirely off guard, went flying out of the hut. Sango grabbed Kagome, yanking her roughly through behind him just as the thick smoke began to roll over her.

Kagome stumbled, tripping and just barely managing to break her fall with her hands as she tumbled out onto the ground. She lay there for a long moment, her heart pounding as she stared down at the dirt beneath her palms.

A loud sound, creaking and groaning, rent the night air. Kagome pushed herself up, swinging around to face the source of it. Sango was standing at the ready facing the hut, wakizashi poised, but nothing appeared to have followed them out.

Instead the hut was shaking, wooden beams groaning as it rose into the air. The saimyōshō were lifting it, some of them flying out from underneath to hold the structure in tact as they rapidly ascended with it.

In moments they were gone, the hut, the webs, and the woman all disappearing into the night.

Miroku looked on from where he had landed in the dirt, eyes wide with disbelief.

"My father," he murmured almost unconsciously. "That was all I…The only lead…"

He trailed off, brow furrowing deeply as he attempted to comprehend what had just happened. Sango turned to him, her face stricken.

"Miroku…I…"

His jaw clenched, his eyes falling shut as he shook his head. Sango fell silent, paling. Her gaze fell as she sheathed her wakizashi. Suddenly, though, she blinked, her hand brushing the fan she had tucked hastily into her taiji-ya's belt when the swarm had come down.

She plucked the fan free, holding it up to examine it. Her expression lightened slightly, and she took a tentative step towards the houshi.

"Miroku," she said softly, holding it out to him. "Look."

He glanced at it from the corner of his eye, turning to look more fully after he got past his initial reluctance. Kagome ventured closer to the two as Miroku stood, taking the fan and spreading it open to get a better look at it.

It was embroidered all over with butterflies, what appeared to be the ageha-chō. Along the edge of the left side two simple kanji were printed.

"'Fuyumi'," Miroku read, frowning. "The woman who lived here with her son. Did you pull this from the body?"

Sango nodded. Kagome frowned, her eyes trailing over the embroidery of the fan.

"Isn't that the Taira clan's mark?" she said. "Fuyumi was a villager."

"A villager who was likely taken by one of the warring clans," Sango put in. "Besides, this is not the fan of a noblewoman. It is a token for a mistress, or else her family name would have been embroidered on it, as well. It must have been some branch of the Taira that took her. Likely they kept her for years, as well, judging from how she was dressed and how clean she looked."

"But how did she end up back here? And like that?" Kagome asked.

Miroku shook his head, sliding the fan shut. His look was still serious, but his eyes were no longer hollow with the look of devastation.

"That is something I will have to ask the Taira when we return to the court," he said resolutely, tucking it away into the front of his robes. "That is…something."

He turned to Sango, offering her a small smile.

"Thank you," he said softly. "For your help, and for this. I know you do not understand, but it means a great deal to me to have it."

"No," Sango said, frowning slightly despite the thanks. "You are right. I do not understand. I wish you would allow me to, though."

Miroku blinked, the smile sliding from his face instantly. His eyes slid away from Sango's, landing on Kagome.

"Kagome-chan," he said, reaching out a hand to her. "What…?"

He plucked at her hair, pulling free several strands of the web that had fallen on her. He squinted at the glittering strands in the faint light offered by the stars, brow furrowing.

"This is…"

"Made of youki," Kagome finished for him, recalling the jolt that had gone through her when the web had first touched her.

She plucked a few more strands from where they had fallen on her shoulder, eyes sliding shut as she focused on the feel of them. Almost immediately they snapped open once more.

The youki was familiar. Terribly, horribly familiar.

"Kagome-chan?" Sango said, laying a hand on her friend's shoulder.

Kagome looked from her to Miroku.

"I know this youki," she said, meeting his eyes. "I've encountered it several times."

Miroku's eyes searched hers, as if he did not quite dare to believe his ears. He took an unconscious step towards her, eyes darkening intently.

"Where? When?" he said, voice strained.

"It attacked a boy in the court, as well as my village," she said, hesitating for a moment before she added, "It was likely involved with the death of the former Tennō-sama, as well."

Miroku stood silent for several long moments, so still it scarcely seemed as if he was breathing.

"Miroku?" Sango said softly.

The eyes he raised to meet hers burned with some strange fire.

"It's him," he said, something strangely like joy in the words. "The youkai who killed my father. He's in the court."

* * *

"Did I not tell you to steer them away from there?" came a male voice in the darkness, low and simmering with barely leashed fury.

"My apologies, Naraku-sama. I was unable to do so without drawing their suspicions. I did not wish to endanger my other mission."

"…I would enjoy killing you where you stand, you useless wretch. Slowly and without mercy."

"Yes, Naraku-sama."

Tense silence stretched for several moments, before a deep sigh sounded at last.

"It would be too great a waste to kill you now, incompetent as you are."

"Yes, Naraku-sama. What are my orders?"

"Continue as you were. Do not draw attention to yourself. And watch the houshi, as well. I've no idea what his fool father managed to tell him, but it was enough for him to find…that place. Not that there was much there to find save the pathetic memories of a helpless little rodent. Ah, well. Soon it will not matter much what he or anyone else knows."

"Yes, Naraku-sama."

* * *

They had been able to return to the campsite before dawn and none of their companions were any the wiser, save the pair that was on watch. Sango had ordered their silence on the matter out of respect for Miroku.

As soon as morning came, after the three had been able to get some sleep, the group set out as planned. Miroku cast one long, inscrutable look back towards the village as they went, but did not say a word in protest. Unconsciously he pressed his hand to the place where Fuyumi’s fan was concealed within his robes. He had gotten what he needed.

For several days everything was as it had been. The group moved along the coast, approaching trade ports, villages, and a few court residences that they happened to be near. They marked their progress on the map as they had thus far, what had once been scarcely an outline of their nation becoming more detailed with each passing day.

Every day, though, Kagome could sense the tension building within Sango.

Despite their best efforts-Kagome's admittedly much milder than Sango's- they had been unable to get Miroku to say a word more about his father's death or the youkai that had killed him. He always managed to make certain that he was in the midst of their companions, preventing them from even having much opportunity to ask.

On the few rides where Sango had managed to get him far enough apart from the others to inquire, he had clammed up entirely at the introduction of the subject. So despite having succeeded in helping their friend to get whatever it was that he had been after, both women were almost as much in the dark as they had been before the incident.

Kagome was more than a little hurt by it. After all, Miroku had been a staunch friend to her through her troubles since first they had met. She had always known he was more the type to keep things to himself, but it stung to think that he would purposefully keep something from her that was obviously so important.

Kagome could not even begin to imagine, though, what Sango was feeling. Sango, who had been his friend before anyone else. Sango, who had known him from childhood and shared with him almost everything that mattered to her. Sango, who loved him better than anyone else in the world.

Thus it did not come as too much of a surprise to Kagome when, several days after the fact as the group was dismounting to set up camp for the night, Sango abruptly grabbed Miroku and dragged him off into the surrounding woods. She had come to the end of her patience it seemed and Kagome knew that things were about to come to a head.

Many in the group were exchanging confused looks, peering in the direction that Sango had stormed off with Miroku in tow. Thinking fast, Kagome quickly told them that Sango had asked the pair of them earlier to sit with her for a discussion on how to continue from here, as they would soon be reaching the point where they would need to board a ship to get to Kyūshū. Not the most brilliant of fibs, she knew, but the best she could do on short notice. Asking Kohaku to oversee the rest of the camp set-up, she quickly started after the pair.

As she moved through the trees after them, she realized she had no idea exactly what she was going to do. She could not very well go back to the campsite without them after the lie she had just told, but she really had no interest in interrupting them. Things would only continue to grow more and more strained between them if Sango was not allowed to have this conversation with him now.

Her steps slowed, indecision overtaking her. The sound of a voice just beyond the next line of trees made the decision for her. Guiltily Kagome crept forward to listen in, consoling herself with the thought that if things got too heated between the two she could intervene.

Sango stood facing Miroku, pale skin deeply flushed with the force of her feelings. Her eyes blazed as they fixed on his face. She was nearly shaking.

Miroku, on the other hand, appeared entirely unruffled. His face was politely distant, a faint and mirthless smile hovering almost reflexively about his lips. His eyes were the only thing that betrayed any upset, darker than usual as they peered down at her.

"Sango-sama," he said, the word nearly a sigh. "It has been a long day's ride. You are obviously tired-"

"I am not tired, Miroku!" Sango snapped. "I am not tired and I am not just in a bad mood and I am not overreacting! I am angry! I am angry because my oldest, closest friend does not even trust me enough to tell me about something that is obviously so important!"

Sango scowled, though the weight that furrowed her brow appeared to be more pain than anger. Miroku blinked, his gaze trailing away from hers guiltily.

"It is not a matter of trust, Sango," he said lowly.

"Then what is it a matter of, Miroku?" she said, shaking her head disbelievingly. "Because I am beginning to feel that I was the only one who truly believed we were friends all this time."

Miroku glanced at her, some of the careful distance slipping from his face. He shook his head, meeting her eyes earnestly.

"You are my closest friend, Sango," he said softly. "Do not doubt that. This…this matter has nothing to do with that."

Sango was silent for a long moment, her eyes searching his face. Slowly the anger drained from her, her leanly muscled frame growing lax. She blinked, and in an instant the fire that had been in her eyes was extinguished. She could not have looked more vulnerable had every bit of armor and every weapon been stripped from her.

Miroku seemed to see this, too, tensing. His grip on his shakujou tightened, and suddenly he looked like he would have given anything to be anywhere else.

"Sango-sama-"

"I feel like a fool, Miroku," Sango murmured hoarsely, blinking hard. "I feel like such a fool. Have I been imagining things, all this time? Have I truly been alone in this, all this time? I mean, I have been obvious, beyond obvious, about my feelings. You know, better than anyone else, that I am useless at concealing what I feel. I know you have seen it!"

The color had drained from Miroku's face. His head was bowed, his grip on his shakujou white-knuckled now.

"Please, stop…"

But Sango could not. She had started and the dam had burst. There was no going back now.

"I love you, Miroku," she said, her voice firm and her eyes unwavering on his face. "I love you and have loved you since we were children. And you know it. There is no way you can not know it. So, please, can you not simply-"

"I am sorry I have misled you, Sango-sama."

Sango froze. The words were spoken lowly, and there was the hollow quality to them of someone repeating words that they had rehearsed a thousand times before.

Miroku's head was still bowed, and it was impossible to see his face. Through her shock, though, Kagome noticed absently that his hands were shaking.

"I was unaware of the depth and nature of your feelings," Miroku pressed on in that same wooden tone. "And if you misunderstood the nature of my own feelings, I apologize. It was never my intention. However, I…I cannot respond to your feelings. I do not share them. I will not ever share them."

He raised his head at last. His features were pale and drawn. His eyes were distant, as if he was not present there at all. Sango could only stare up at him, uncomprehending.

"I will return to the camp now," he said. "Perhaps it would be better if, for the sake of the mission and avoiding further misunderstandings, we did not speak as much."

And then he turned and was gone, just like that.

Sango stood, staring dumbstruck at the spot where he had been. Kagome found that she, too, could scarcely move, unable to believe what she had just witnessed.

Had that truly been Miroku? The Miroku who was unfailingly kind to almost everyone? The Miroku who had all but confessed his love for Sango to her? Could that cold man she had just seen really be the same person she thought she had known all this time?

Abruptly Sango stumbled forward a step, as if she would go after the houshi. She stopped, though, blinking hard. A small, barely visible tremor ran through her frame. Before she could stop to consider it, Kagome found herself moving forward towards her friend.

Sango's gaze shifted towards her. She looked at her for a long moment, eyes wide and bright.

"Did you…see all that?" she asked softly, needing some sort of confirmation that it really had happened.

Slowly Kagome nodded, beyond even guilt at this point.

Sango nodded in return, the gesture strangely like the mimicry of a child. Kagome was not even certain if she was aware that she was moving. Her lips wobbled tremulously in what might have been an attempt at a smile.

"I guess I…really misunderstood things," she said softly.

Her voice cracked on the last word and along with it any semblance of composure that she still retained. Her eyes overflowed, thick tears tracking down over her pale cheeks. She ducked her head, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

Wordlessly Kagome wrapped her in her arms, pressing her friend's face to her shoulder. She bit down on her lip, fighting back the tears she could feel welling in her own eyes. Her breaking down would not do Sango any good.

She continued to hold her friend until dusk had faded into darkness. The entire time Sango did not make a single sound, the trembling of her shoulders the only indication of a pain that Kagome knew was likely deeper than any she had ever felt before.

Eventually Sango was calm enough for Kagome to escort her back to the campsite. Though exhausted might have been a better word for it. Her docility as she allowed herself to be led back was almost childlike. Inwardly Kagome was anxious. She was not certain what would happen when Sango was faced with the sight of Miroku again.

Her worry was for nothing, though. Miroku was nowhere to be found when they returned. Some covert questioning of Haru revealed that he had not been back since Sango had first dragged him off. Camp set-up was long since finished and the group was beginning to look suspicious.

This gave Kagome something entirely new to worry about. She informed the group that she was going to see if she could go catch something for that night's meal, quietly asking Haru to look after Sango. The noblewoman had seated herself on the edge of the camp, staring silently down into her lap. Haru agreed, though he appeared to be a bit confused. Kagome hadn't the time to explain things to him.

Immediately she set out back into the woods in search of the houshi. A small part of her was worried at the thought that he had not yet come back, but with every step she took her anger grew to overtake concern. She could still feel Sango shaking against her and hear Miroku's callous words echoing in her ears. By the time she stumbled across him she had worked herself into a thorough rage.

He sat in the muck at the edge of a minor river that they had been traveling parallel to for several days now, hunched and somehow smaller than Kagome could ever recall seeing him. At any other time the sight might have inspired concern in her, but at the moment she could scarcely be made to see anything through the haze of her own anger. Her hands balled at her sides.

"How dare you treat her like that?" she cried, unable to contain herself any longer.

Miroku started, turning to face her. He did not move from his place on the river's bank, his expression strangely vacant.

"Have you nothing to say for yourself?" Kagome pressed after several moments of blank silence. "Even if you don't return her feelings, was that any way to treat her? Isn't she your friend? You crushed her, Miroku! In all the time that I have known you, I never once thought you cruel until now!"

"And I never thought you an eavesdropper," Miroku returned, voice almost entirely without inflection. "It seems we were both mistaken. Now, if you have said your piece, please go, Kagome. This is not a matter in which you are concerned."

And just like that he turned his back on her. Kagome stood in open-mouthed silence for several moments, unable to process his complete nonchalance. He did not seem to care in the least that he had just crushed the heart of the woman who had stood by him since he was a child.

"Not my…concern?" she echoed, feeling as if she might choke on the force of her own outrage. "Aren't you both my friends? Haven't I confided in you since we first met? How can you expect me to just sit by and watch you act like this?"

She stormed down the bank, stopping a few lengths short of him. He tensed, but did not turn to face her.

"Believe me when I say that what I have done was far kinder than you think it," he said lowly, some of the tension in his frame entering his voice. "What good is there in giving her hope when her feelings cannot be returned? No. This way she can be done with it…all of it, once and for all."

The faintest tremor, barely discernible, went through his words at the end. It was enough to cut through the haze of Kagome's anger. She blinked, the vision before her seeming to shift.

She had thought that he looked small. Suddenly she understood why. It was not apathy, but exhaustion. Not nonchalance that she saw in him, but a weariness so deep it had drained him of all else.

At the same moment she realized why he had dismissed Sango and her confession so quickly. Miroku was more skilled than anyone she knew at putting on a good face, but even he could only endure so much.

"You love her, don't you?" Kagome said quietly, everything clicking suddenly into place.

Miroku was silent, unmoving.

"Why?" Kagome said, dropping down to kneel at his side in the mud. "If you love her, why are you doing this? Is it about your rank? You already know she doesn't care about that! So why-?"

"Kagome," Miroku bit out, cutting her off. "Stop. Just stop. It’s done and nothing will change it now."

Kagome fell silent, watching him. He kept his face carefully averted now, and she wanted nothing more than to reach out to him. She was at a loss, though. She could not understand what he was thinking, choosing to put himself and Sango through this. So she sat, watching him with wide eyes and willing him to say something-anything-that would help her to understand.

"Please go, Kagome," Miroku sighed at length, the tension draining from his voice to leave it hollow once more. "While I would usually commend you for your loyalty, in this instance you are sorely misguided. I would suggest refocusing your efforts on consoling your friend."

Still he would not look at her. Kagome reached out to lay a hand on his arm, determined that if he was so bent on dismissing her he would at least face her honestly first.

"You’re my friend, too, Miroku," she said. "And if I'm so misguided, why not set me straight? Why not explain it to me? Whatever this is, you shouldn't have to go it all alone. You've done that long enough, haven't you?"

He hesitated for several long moments before at last turning to face her with heavy reluctance. Kagome nearly gasped.

His eyes were deeper and darker than she remembered, vaguely unfocused even as they met hers. His skin was sallow, all traces of his usual good humor drained from his features. He looked exhausted and so deeply alone that she thought her heart would break at the sight.

"Oh, Miroku," she said, her voice cracking around his name. "Why are you doing this? Why do you always try to do everything alone? Sango…Sango wants so much to be there for you. And I've seen the way you look at her. How happy you are…and how you're always trying to be near her…so why? Why can't you two just be happy together?"

Tears that she had been holding back since she had seen the devastation in Sango's face rolled down her cheeks, thick and warm and frustrated. Why did it have to be like this? Why couldn't two good people just be together? Why did things always have to end up like this?

Miroku blinked, some of the haze clearing from his dark eyes. He reached out tentatively, swiping a thumb across one of her cheeks.

"I'm sorry," he murmured lowly, and Kagome had the strange feeling that it was not really her that he was speaking to. "I'm so sorry. But I will not take my happiness at her expense."

Kagome blinked at him, sniffling. A frown tugged at the corners of Miroku's lips as he watched her. His eyes slid shut, his features contorting as pain at last registered across his face.

"Say that we did marry," he said, the words seeming to spill from him without his consent. "Say that we did. Say that Sango forsook rank and reputation for my sake. Say that we had a few happy, wonderful years and a child together. What will happen when I am gone? What will be left to her then? No rank, no reputation, and a cursed child to raise on her own. I would not…I could not do that to her…I-"

"Wait," Kagome said. "What do you mean, 'gone'? Why would you be gone, Miroku?"

Miroku paused, meeting her eyes as if he had only just fully realized what he had said to her. She saw hesitation cross his features, uncertainty. She gripped his forearm more tightly, holding his gaze fast with her own. After several moments he sighed, his eyes sliding shut.

"If I tell you this, you can never breathe a word of it to Sango," he said.

His eyes slid open, meeting hers with utmost seriousness.

"Do you understand, Kagome?"

It was her turn to hesitate. Could she really face Sango every day knowing the reason why Miroku had rejected her and keeping it from her? Could she allow her friend to suffer the thought that the houshi had so coldly pushed her away for no reason other than that she had been misunderstanding his feelings all these years?

But Miroku was her friend, as well. Miroku was suffering, as well. Could she allow him to continue to suffer all on his own? Something, a faint light in his eyes as he looked to her, told her that he wanted to tell someone. That this burden, whatever it was, had at last grown to be too much for him to carry on his own.

Could she abandon him now, after all the times that he had stuck by her?

Slowly Kagome nodded.

"I swear it," she said, feeling her stomach sink even as the words left her.

Miroku nodded. He sat up a little straighter, his gaze falling as he shored himself up. Kagome waited silently, watching him.

"Do me the favor, Kagome-chan, of saying nothing until I have finished," he said quietly, his eyes on the muck beneath them.

Kagome nodded.

"Alright."

He nodded once more, more to himself than to her, and drew a quiet breath.

"You already know that my father was killed by a youkai…the youkai I had hoped to find in that village," he said. "What you do not know is that that youkai…it did not merely kill my father. It wanted him to suffer. It wanted his family to suffer, as well, for generations and generations to come until the end."

He paused, and Kagome saw his jaw tighten as if closing around any more words. He drew another steadying breath, lifting the arm which she still gripped. It was the one around which he always wore his rosary, and the beads clacked together loudly in the silence between them.

"The youkai placed a curse on my father," Miroku continued lowly, his eyes moving to fix on the rosary as he spoke. "He returned to the court with just enough…just enough strength to explain the curse to me, and to tell me what must be done. Upon his death, the curse manifested itself in me. For the time being, this rosary works to seal it. However, the curse…it grows more quickly with the passing of each year."

"The day is fast coming when it will consume me, and drag my soul down into the lowest level of hell. That is the youkai's curse upon my family. That is the curse I have carried with me since my father passed. And that is the curse I would pass to any child that might be born to me."

He fell silent, exhaling softly. His shoulders relaxed, some sort of bizarre relief sweeping through him. Absently Kagome guessed that in his head he had repeated those carefully practiced words a thousand times, wanting but never willing to speak them to someone. Though the someone he had wanted was likely not her.

Beyond that fleeting thought, though, Kagome's mind had gone blank with horror. She felt as if she could not quite draw enough breath into her lungs.

"Miroku…" she said, his name escaping her as a strangled gasp.

He frowned, his relief short-lived. At last he was able to raise his eyes to meet hers.

"Kagome," he sighed. "Stop that. This is the look that I cannot bear. Please, stop."

"How do you expect me to look, when you've just told me you're to die!" Kagome cried, bringing a hand up to scrub angrily at her watering eyes. "How…how could you hide this, Miroku? All this time…from me, from Sango-"

"You swore not to say a word of this to her," Miroku broke in pointedly, and then, softening a bit, "And what would telling either of you have done save to upset you needlessly? I should not even have told you-"

"We're your friends, Miroku!" Kagome snapped, readily embracing anger over the feeling of abject misery hiding just beneath it. "We…we could have helped you! Been there for you, at least!"

"I've no desire to involve either of you in this matter," Miroku said firmly, shaking his head. "The youkai who did this is powerful and obviously merciless. When I…If I am able to find it before it is too late, then it will be my battle to fight. I will not put either of you in the middle of it. The curse belongs to my family alone. I will not allow it to touch anyone else."

Kagome blinked, a sudden thought occurring to her. The jolt of hope that shot through her was so strong it was nearly painful, dissolving her anger in a flash. She leaned in towards him.

"The youkai…what your father told you needed to be done," she said, the words falling from her in a confused rush. "If you can destroy it, will the curse be destroyed as well?"

Miroku blinked, his gaze falling away from hers. He gave a small nod, and Kagome's spirits leapt.

"Yes," he said quietly. "But I have been searching for years, Kagome-chan. Every time I have left the court I have searched. My father…he could give me no more than a vague description of the youkai and what it had done before he passed. He was too weak even to recall why he had gone after it. And there is likely not much time left to me before…"

He trailed off, eyeing the accursed hand between them. Kagome frowned, shaking her head vehemently.

"No," she said. "No! In that village, you found something! The fan and the web. It's in the court. Surely we can find it if it's within the court!"

"There is nothing for us to find, Kagome," Miroku returned. "I chose to tell you this because you insisted, but I will not involve you any further in it. And this youkai has been successfully evading me for several years now. Nothing is certain, even with what we found."

Kagome bit her lip, feeling the fear welling slowly to the surface at the resignation she could see in his eyes. Some part of him was prepared to die, even after what they had managed to find. She gripped his arm more tightly, as if she could hold him there by sheer force of will.

"You can't give up, Miroku," she murmured. "You can't, and I won't. I won't ever give up on you. And Sango-"

"Sango would not give up, either," Miroku said softly. "Sango would never give up."

Kagome blinked, raising her eyes to him. Miroku offered her a small, bitter smile.

"I know her well enough, Kagome," he said. "Were I to tell her this, she would stay with me until the end. She would want to fight until the end. You think I never wanted to tell her all of this? I have. There has not passed a day where I have not considered it. But what sort of man would it make me if I told her? What sort of man would I be if I told the only woman I have ever loved all this knowing that she might end up wasting her life on me because of it? No. I will take this with me to my final rest. I will give her her life, Kagome. It is the only thing I can give her."

To her great shame, Kagome felt her eyes begin to overflow once more. She wanted to be strong for him. She wanted, so much, to be able to be his support for once, when he was finally opening up to her. But she was helpless against the sadness that welled up from the very depths of her.

"You said it," she murmured hoarsely.

Miroku frowned, reaching out to gather her to himself. But Kagome shook her head, moving back. She was not the one that needed to be comforted here. She swiped her sleeve angrily across her cheek.

"You said that you love her," she murmured. "I knew it. I just…kami, Miroku…."

"I have long since accepted all of this, Kagome," he said softly. "My feelings and my burden. And I am well aware that I cannot change either of them. But it is mine to choose what to do from there. I will continue trying to avenge my father and break the curse. And I…I will continue trying to support Sango in whatever it is she chooses to do, though I may have to do so at more of a distance after…after all that has happened. But I will be fine, Kagome. I can bear this."

Kagome was silent for several long moments, unable even to form words. Slowly she forced herself to sit more straightly, hands fisting in the fabric of her hakama. Tears continued to trickle down her cheeks without her consent or control, but she knew there was at least one thing she could do for him now. She drew a deep breath.

"You shouldn't have to bear it alone," she sniffled. "I want…please, anything you've to say, anything you've held back…please say it. Every last word of it. I'll listen. I'll bear it with you."

Miroku sighed. He reached out, placing a gentle hand on the back of her head.

"You are a good woman, Kagome," he said softly. "And a true friend. But I have no desire to burden you with any more than you already carry."

Kagome reached up, grabbing the hand on her head and pulling it down to cradle it between her own. She sniffled, tears falling onto the back of his gloved hand as she bowed her head over it.

"Then believe me when I say it's far worse a burden to bear to think of you bearing all this on your own."

Miroku was silent for several long moments, and Kagome bit her lip. It seemed he really was determined to go it alone. Suddenly, though, he gripped her hands in return.

"…It is strange," Miroku murmured, almost to himself. "It sounds awful to say it, but seeing you like this almost makes it easier, somehow. I…I always suspected this day might come, when one of us would break the delicate pretense we have always managed to keep up of being close friends and nothing more. Some part of me had hoped that I could avoid it forever, though. I…from the time I was young, almost as far back as I can recall, all that I ever wanted was to be by her side, even…even if it could not be in the manner that I truly desired. I thought if I could remain as her friend…And now that I have effectively ended it all, I cannot even find it in myself to shed tears over it…"

Haltingly, softly, he went on to tell her of his father. Of how he had watched him die. Of how he had searched desperately, for years, for the youkai he had described and the village he had only vaguely been able to describe in the hopes of avenging him and breaking the curse. Of how hard he had striven to remain Sango's close companion, aware all the time of her feelings and his feelings and the impossibility of it all.

But he had been selfish, he said. He had allowed himself just that one selfish indulgence. He had wanted to remain with her as long as possible, even knowing it would end in pain for them both. And he told her of the child he would someday have, with a woman he did not love, to whom he would pass this curse and this duty. And he told her of the guilt that ate at him when he thought of that child, not even born yet and already doomed.

Several times Kagome had to bite her lip to keep from begging him to stop. But she knew it must give him some comfort to say it, and so she forced herself to listen to every word. She merely sat at his side silently, gripping his hand between hers and listening and crying tears that he could not.

* * *

It took some time for Kagome to recollect herself enough for them to return to the camp. Unfortunately their return did not make things much easier.

Not only was the group more than a bit bemused at her lack of any food for that night's meal, but Sango was stone-faced as she watched Miroku walk into the camp. His mask of good humor was firmly back in place, though, and he feigned ignorance of her cold looks as he made apologies to the group for having been unable to find anything. Thankfully they still had a surplus of edible roots and nuts among their supplies, so the matter was settled quickly if not to everyone's satisfaction.

While inwardly awed at the strength that allowed Miroku to continue on in such a manner after having given over the thing he had wanted most in the world since he was a child, Kagome could only sit herself apart from the rest of the group on her futon. Emotionally she was beyond exhausted, her head fairly spinning still. She could not bear to watch Miroku and Sango on top of that, knowing all too well how much pain they were both in.

When morning came the next day they resumed their travels. Sango, for all that Kagome knew how deeply she must be hurting, was a leader through and through. Though she was tense and rather quiet, there was little to indicate to those who were not aware of it what she was suffering through.

A few times during the ride Kagome attempted to ride alongside her, but she was waved off succinctly each time. Eventually she realized that Sango was holding herself together by threads, unwilling to break down in front of the taiji-ya. In the light of day, at least, she could not tolerate kind words or pitying looks.

Miroku also managed to give off the impression that nothing out of the ordinary had occurred, though he did so much more easily and convincingly. He had had years and years of practice at it, after all. Watching him, Kagome found, was even more painful than watching Sango. After all, he did not even have the bitter comfort of righteous anger to console him.

Thus a tense, painful week passed for the three, though the rest of their companions were not much the wiser. The only reprieve that Kagome could look forward to in the midst of her continuous worries about the fractured nature of her friends' relationship was that the group was nearing the area that Kouga had marked on the map as the territory of the Southern Oni Clan. It was not much, but it would at least offer a distraction.

* * *

Two nights before they arrived in the territory of the oni, Kagome sat up after the others had gone to sleep. She felt exhausted, struggling hard to stay awake just long enough to look into the link. She had not been sleeping much since everything had happened between Sango and Miroku, kept up late into the night turning it all over and over again in her mind. No matter how many times she went through the tangled mess of it, though, the only solution she could ever come up with was to reveal to Sango what Miroku had told her. Her word and loyalty to Miroku, however, bound her fast.

At last, though, she was certain that everyone save the pair on guard were asleep for the night. She roused herself from where she was laying alongside Shippou, carefully moving away from him to sit up. She pulled the bead from her robes, intending to merely take a quick peek before attempting to get some sleep.

The link was crystal clear, and Kagome found herself looking in on a scene she would much sooner have avoided.

It seemed all of Inuyasha's determined efforts were coming to fruition. The time had come.

Kikyou knelt at a low table, a steaming mug of tea cradled between her pale hands. She eyed the man standing across from her, a faint, contented smile playing around the corners of her lips.

"You truly do ruin the effect by scowling so, my Lord," she commented, a slight playfulness to her tone that Kagome had never suspected her capable of. "Otherwise you might be perfectly handsome."

Inuyasha's scowl deepened, though he only vaguely registered her words. He was uncomfortable. Everything felt too tight. Despite the fine material, it chafed against his skin. The stiff black and gold-lined hakama. The black patterned haori. It all made him itch.

He fought against the urge simply to shred it, clawed hands flexing absently at his sides.

"Just wanna get this whole stupid ceremony over with," he muttered to himself.

Too loudly. Kikyou's expression sobered in an instant.

"The ceremony will be over in a few days' time," she said, eyes lowering to fix on her mug of tea. "Then you will no longer have to trouble yourself over such trivial matters."

Inuyasha looked at her, his stomach sinking.

"Kikyou…" he said lowly. "I…I didn't mean it like that…"

"How did you mean it, then?" she returned pointedly, eyes flicking back up to his.

"Kikyou-"

She set her mug down with a slight clatter, rising to stand with painful dignity.

"I am well aware that I am the one who pressed for this wedding," she said, dark eyes bright and delicate features strained. "However, I cannot understand why you, Inuyasha, have been pushing it forward as if…as if it were some tiresome chore to be gotten through as quickly as possible. Is…is the idea of marriage to me so burdensome to you?"

Her chin was angled with its usual air of imperiousness, but a faint tremor went through her. Inuyasha's gut twisted. He took a step towards her, but she tensed and he stopped. He frowned, his eyes searching her face.

"I thought this was what you wanted, Kikyou," he said.

She blinked, her gaze falling to the table that separated them.

"Perhaps," she said, her voice so soft he nearly missed it. "But it is not all."

Inuyasha's gaze fell. He stood, silent and tense. She was right. It wasn't all.

Kikyou drew a breath, her hands clenching at her sides at this tacit confirmation. Slowly she raised her gaze.

"There is something I need to say to you that I should have said long ago," she said, resolve squaring her shoulders.

Inuyasha experienced a moment of cold fear, his eyes flying up to meet hers. Had he finally failed her one too many times?

"Kikyou…"

"I love you," she said hurriedly.

Inuyasha felt the words like a physical blow. He blinked at her, wide-eyed.

Kikyou drew a shaky breath, red suffusing her pale features. It was the most vulnerable and possibly the most beautiful she had ever looked, Kagome thought vaguely. Strangely numb, she could not have torn herself away if she had tried.

"I love you, Inuyasha," Kikyou repeated, a slight tremor running through the determined words. "I…I have loved you for years. And I should have told you long ago. But I…"

She hesitated, her gaze falling.

"…I have lost everything that I have ever cared for. I thought…foolish as it sounds, I have always felt that voicing my feelings would be…would be tantamount to asking the kami to steal you from me, as well. I…I was so sure that I was safe as long as I said nothing."

Her eyes moved back up to him in askance.

"But I…I would have you know that you are the one thing in this world that I could not lose," she pressed on, despite the visible trembling that had begun in her limbs. "Though I am…frightened, I would be your wife in more than name alone. I would be the wife who holds you dearer than anything in the world. So, please do not leave me behind. Please stay with me. I can't lose you."

She drew a shaky breath, offering him a wavering smile. As terrified as she appeared to be saying all this, there was relief there, too. She had been afraid of losing anything else, holding herself back from him for such a long time. And now, for better or worse, she was exposed and vulnerable to whatever came next.

Inuyasha moved towards her, drawn as to a child in desperate need of reassurance. He stepped over the table, impatient to reach her, and took her into his arms. She laughed, a breathless little sound as her hands curled in his robes.

"It's alright," he murmured to her. "It's okay, Kikyou. I get it now. I'm not going anywhere. I promise I'm not going anywhere."

She grew quiet in his arms, tensing. Expectant.

The guilty turning in his gut said he was not unaware of it. He was silent. He simply held her.

Kagome broke the link, blinking slowly as she returned to herself. Absently she tucked the bead back into the safe pocket in the front of her robes, feeling strangely distant from everything. She wondered if she was more tired than she had thought.

She had finally done it, she thought absently. She had finally said what was needed for both of them.

And, despite the dull ache in her chest that she knew would likely bloom into something more painful when she thought on all this later, a part of her was glad. At this rate, they could be happy together. There would be no secrets between them, no dark curses to keep them apart. Inuyasha had a real chance at happiness with her.

And so Kagome lay down, curling herself around the sleeping kitsune in her futon. It still took some time, but when she at last got to sleep she slept dreamlessly until morning.

* * *

True to Kouga's markings and Sango's estimate, the group reached the territory of the Southern Oni Clan two days later. They had to veer eastward and inland, away from the coast, in order to reach the small range of mountains that Kouga had scribbled in as belonging to the clan. It made Kagome more than a little uneasy, aware as she was that they were not more than two weeks' journey from the court, but she comforted herself with the thought that they likely still had a month at least before they could consider returning.

What they found there, though, was not at all what they had anticipated. A village-an actual, human village-sat close to the base of the mountains in which Kouga had indicated the Southern Oni Clan lived. Even Miroku, the most well-traveled among them, thought the sight of humans living so close to such a large group of youkai an odd one.

As they entered the village, Kagome could not help but remember what the ryū had told her about the former Tennō. About humans and youkai living more closely together. She wondered if perhaps something like this was what he had meant, even as she continued to question exactly why he had taken up such a stance as his own.

They were not long in learning, however, that the oni and the humans were close in proximity only. The villagers welcomed them with an air of eager desperation after learning that they were a group composed of taiji-ya and spiritualists. They brought them to their headman, a relatively young man who wore his mantle of leadership uneasily.

He lost no time in promising his village's support if only they would help them, quickly explaining the village's plight. For years and years people from the village had been periodically abducted never to be seen or heard from again. They knew it was the oni who were doing this, coming down from the mountains to snatch them up and feast on their flesh. The headman begged them to exterminate the oni, or at least to drive them away, as they were too poor to be able to afford to leave their village in search of another.

Sango readily agreed to the request, promising that they would do whatever they could to help. It was her clan's job, after all, to protect humans from the youkai who chose to listen to the calls of their baser instincts. There were many tales, as well, of the brutish nature of the oni. They were told to often be monsters in spirit as well as in appearance, some with a taste for the flesh of humans.

The villagers also informed them of a witch living on the very fringes of their village with her half-monster of a son. They said that it was her who was spying on them for the oni, picking out the people that they would take. They had tried to drive her out on several occasions, but they had never been able to and feared pushing her too far lest she summon the oni to devour them all.

After conferring briefly amongst themselves, Sango decided that she wanted to go ahead and confront the Oni Clan head on. If they went after the witch first they risked the oni catching wind of it and arming themselves. They would explore their mountain a bit to find the best point of entry before attacking directly to take them by surprise.

Kagome, though, had been caught by the mention of the witch. Or, more precisely, by the mention of the witch's 'half-monster' son. The wording was too familiar for her simply to ignore it. She begged Sango to allow her to go explore there first, promising she would not make contact and would rejoin them as quickly as she could afterwards.

Reluctantly Sango agreed, though she made Kagome swear that she would only observe from a distance. Kagome agreed and the group split up. Haru and Shippou remained within the village. Sango, Miroku, and the taiji-ya headed towards the oni's mountain. Kagome started off for the fringes of the village where the woman and her son were said to live.

For all of the villagers' complaints, Kagome could sense very little youki coming from the run-down hut as she approached it and no jyaki whatsoever. There was not the slightest hint of malice in the place.

She frowned, confused, as she eyed the rather pathetic looking structure from the safety of the surrounding woods she had taken cover in. There was no movement around the front of the hut that she could see from her vantage point, and the faint youki she could sense did not seem to be coming from within the hut but from somewhere nearby. It also felt gentle somehow, brushing almost timidly against her spiritual sense.

She sat for several long moments, watching from the woods and silently debating whether or not she dared to get closer. She had promised Sango that she would not approach it on her own, but she was getting nothing out of simply sitting there waiting. And surely she could handle herself against such weak youki. Kagome knew she could not simply leave. Something would not let her.

She dismounted, tying the reins of her mount around the base of a tree to keep it from wandering. She drew her bow and an arrow from the quiver at her back, notching it and silently apologizing to Sango for breaking her word.

She crept forward towards the hut, senses on high alert though she could feel no threat. Even as she moved closer the hut appeared to be nothing out of the ordinary, save perhaps being a bit more broken down than most. She could sense nothing inside, though, and continued moving past the structure to see if she could not find the source of the youki she sensed behind it.

A small plot of land, the rows where crops were normally grown lying fallow at the moment, stretched out behind the hut up to the woods that bordered it. What caught Kagome's eye, though, was the hulking figure seated on a large stone in the midst of the plot.

His face was strangely elongated, his skin the color of burnt umber, and his eyes unusually round. When standing Kagome knew that he would easily be two heads taller than herself, his large, solid frame covered only by a ragged haori that might once have served as a blanket. An oni if Kagome had ever seen one.

She was struck, though, by the sight he made, long face upraised and lips drawn back to reveal a gap-toothed, earnest smile as a pair of small birds came to land in his outstretched palms. He sat perfectly still, delighted as he watched them hop about there, eating whatever grains he was holding. Kagome could not imagine that this was the flesh-eating half-monster the villagers had described.

She moved forward slowly, debating as to whether or not she should call out to him. He caught sight of her first, though, large eyes nearly bulging out of his head. He stumbled upright, his birds scattering in a rush of wings and feathers. Even from a distance Kagome could see that he was trembling.

"D-Don't hurt me," he pleaded, voice unexpectedly soft as he raised his broad hands defensively before him. "I didn't do nothing, I promise I didn't. I was just waitin' for Ma. Please…"

He backed away from her slowly, large frame poised to flee at any sudden movements from her.

"Wait," Kagome called to him, careful to keep her voice soft. "Please wait. I do not mean you any harm. I would just like to talk to you, if you have a moment."

Slowly she bent down, placing her bow and arrow in the dirt at her feet. She raised both her hands, lifting them to show him that they were empty. He stopped moving away, though he still shook visibly. He bit his lip, eyes darting about rapidly in search of an escape.

"Ma…Ma says don't talk to strangers," he said anxiously.

Kagome met his eyes, taking a small step forward. He jerked, nearly jumping out of his own skin, and she halted.

"Please don't be scared," she said. "My name is Kagome. What’s yours?"

He blinked at her, his brow furrowing. He looked confused, as if no one had ever asked him that question before.

"J-Jinenji," he said after a moment.

"Jinenji-san," Kagome repeated, offering him a smile. "Pleased to meet you, Jinenji-san. And now, you see, we're not strangers anymore."

He blinked once more, frown deepening as he considered this. Slowly his trembling abated.

"I…I guess so," he said.

Kagome's smile widened. She took another small step towards him. His shoulders came up instinctively, but he made no move to run.

"Please, Jinenji-san, I promise I am not here to hurt you," Kagome said, moving step by small step towards him. "Do you think you could answer a few questions for me? The villagers asked me to come here to look into something, so perhaps you can help me."

Jinenji went rigid at the mention of the villagers.

"W-We didn't do nothing," he said, eyes falling to the earth between them. "I swear. Me and Ma didn't do anything to them."

As Kagome drew closer, she could see a number of scars criss-crossing the rough flesh of Jinenji's limbs. The smile faded from her face as her eyes traced over the networks of puckered flesh, some of the marks still dark enough to be relatively new.

"Did…did the villagers do this to you?" she asked, craning her neck to meet his eyes.

He blinked down at her, frowning deeply before giving a timid nod.

"What? Why?" Kagome breathed, eyes widening.

Wounding a youkai badly enough to leave a scar was no small feat. She could scarcely imagine what the villagers had done to him to cause that much damage. Outrage, deeper than she could explain, rose up white hot in her chest.

"I'm a…a hanyou," Jinenji murmured, fidgeting beneath the intensity of her look. "T-The villagers want me to leave. Th-They think I want to hurt them, but I don't. They hurt Ma sometimes, too. It…makes me sad."

He bowed his head, a sheen of tears suddenly bright in his bulbous eyes. Another hanyou flitted briefly through her mind, and Kagome thought that her heart might break. Answering tears pricked in the corners of her eyes as she looked up into his face.

Despite his size, there was something infinitely gentle about him, something childlike and scared in the way he fidgeted and hunched his shoulders. To judge from the severity of his scars, he had never even lifted a finger in defense of himself when he had been attacked.

"I'm so sorry," Kagome murmured, her voice hoarse as she blinked hard. "The villagers said that they were afraid you would try to hurt them. But you…you would never hurt anyone, would you?"

She reached out slowly, ever so slowly, to press the tips of her fingers to one of the most prominent scars on his forearm. Jinenji blinked down at her, face crumpling as fat tears spilled over onto his cheeks.

"Kagome-sama…"

"Don't you touch my son!"

The sudden shriek rang out from several lengths behind them and Kagome jumped, spinning to face the person. An old, haggard looking woman came charging at her, a rusty hoe upraised in her hands. She swung it and Kagome cried out, raising her arms to shield her head.

Something closed around her waist and Kagome was jerked up and back, her feet leaving the ground.

"Please stop it, Ma!" Jinenji cried. "Kagome-sama's nice! She's not…hurting me…"

Kagome's eyes slid open, her heart hammering hard against her rib cage. Jinenji had snatched her up, holding her at his eye level to keep her out of the reach of the woman. His mother. She scowled up at them, deeply lined features twisting.

"Don't be a fool, Jinenji!" she snapped, pointing the hoe at Kagome. "Just look at her! A miko! One touch from her and you're done for! No doubt it's those villagers what sent her to hurt you. You put her down right now before-!"

But Jinenji was shaking his head, raising Kagome higher as if he feared his mother might jump up to get at her. Kagome clutched at his hand to steady herself, dizzy at the height.

"Jinenji!" his mother shrieked, stomping her foot.

"Please, Ma'am," Kagome said, leaning out to look down at her. "I'm sorry for intruding, but I promise I have no intention of harming your son. I only want to help."

"Hmph!" the woman scoffed, craning her neck to glare up at her. "Help those villagers, you mean! We won't be driven out, you hear me? We've nowhere else to go! What other village would have us, Jinenji looking as he does? Besides, I've just as much right as any of 'em! My family's lived on this land for years, so-!"

"Please, Ma'am," Kagome tried once more. "I'm here from the court. I'm not siding with anyone. The villagers seem to be afraid of you and Jinenji-san, but Jinenji-san seems to be just as scared as they are. I only want to understand what is going on."

The old woman scowled up at her for several silent moments, dark eyes searching her face. At last she lowered the hoe, though her scowl did not diminish in the least.

"Fine," she huffed. "S'pose I can at least hear whatever it is you've to say. Come on. If you're seen speaking to us it'll be trouble all around. And just know that if you make one strange move, I won't hesitate to knock that pretty head off your shoulders, courtier or no. Understand?"

She brandished the hoe warningly and Kagome nodded. The old woman turned and started it back toward the hut. Gently Jinenji set Kagome back on the ground, long face drawn down into an apologetic frown.

"Sorry about Ma," he murmured.

Kagome shook her head.

"It's alright," she said. "I understand."

She truly did. Jinenji was obviously too gentle to help himself. Someone had to be strong enough to protect him.

"Come on," she said, holding out a hand to him. "Let's go figure this out."

He stared at her hand as if he were not quite certain what to do with it. Hesitantly he reached out, wrapping his own much larger hand around hers. Kagome smiled up at him. She could not say if it were his timidity or his gentle aura or something else altogether, but something in her was drawn to him. She wanted to help him. To protect him.

He blinked slowly, that same awkward smile he had worn while watching the birds spreading tentatively across his face. Kagome walked with him into the hut, not surprised to find that the place was really much too small for him to live comfortably. It took a good deal of twisting for him to get through the doorway, and once he was inside he had to remain hunched over when standing to keep from destroying the roof's thatching. Kagome frowned to herself, making a mental note to address that issue as well once everything else was sorted out.

Jinenji's mother did not offer her tea or a cushion to sit on, so Kagome simply knelt across from her on the dirt floor. Jinenji took a seat beside his mother, head bowed and hands twisting anxiously in his lap as the two women faced each other.

"You wanted to talk, so talk," the old woman said shortly.

Mentally Kagome brushed off her slight annoyance at the woman's abrupt manner, reminding herself that she was intruding on her land, after all.

"As I said, the villagers asked me to come to look into you and your son," Kagome said. "They explained to me that people in the village have been disappearing for years and that…that they think that you and your son might be partially responsible for it. After seeing Jinenji-san for myself, though, I believe that they must be mistaken somehow."

Some of the edge went out of the woman's expression. She eyed Kagome consideringly.

"Well, then, it seems you're no idiot, at least," she huffed. "My Jinenji couldn't hurt a bug if he wanted to, let alone a person. Besides, he never goes into the village if he can help it. Every time he's even gone near it, those animals've attacked him."

Kagome frowned, her eyes shifting to Jinenji and his scars.

"Do you have any idea why the villagers might suspect Jinenji-san of doing all this?" she asked.

Jinenji's mother snorted, lips twisting wryly.

"As if they need any more reason than the fact he's hanyou," she said. "They'd sooner blame us and drive us out than take the time to figure out what's really happening to those people."

"I don't mean to pry, but…" Kagome hesitated, her eyes flicking away from and then back to the woman. "Is…Is Jinenji's father one of the oni that live up on the mountain?"

Immediately the old woman's expression hardened, closing off as surely as if she had slid a mask down over her face.

"Why?" she hissed, rising half-way from where she sat. "So you can tell me how it's unnatural? Dirty? Or is it that you're one who thinks the oni eat children? That Jinenji got it from his father? I should've known! You put on a sweet face, but you're no different from the rest of them! Go! Get off my land this instant!"

She rose fully, grabbing the hoe she had laid across her knees and waving it threateningly. Kagome flinched, but forced herself to remain where she was.

"Please, I didn't mean it like that at all," she said, raising her hands in a gesture of peace. "One of the people I am…I was closest in the world to…he's a hanyou, too. So I understand. If you loved Jinenji-san's father then you loved him, regardless. I only want to understand what is going on. The villagers do seem to believe that the oni are responsible for the disappearances, as well."

The old woman blinked, hesitating.

"Don't hurt her, Ma," Jinenji murmured from behind her.

She glanced back at him, heaving a loud sigh before returning to sit cross-legged at his side. She set the hoe aside, her frown a bit sheepish around the edges.

"I did love him," she asserted, dark eyes meeting Kagome's insistently. "As a girl I loved Jinenji's father very much. And as to those villagers, it's just the same sort of nonsense. They'd sooner find someone to blame than figure out what's wrong. Have you ever seen an oni? They're hulking and frightening and not the prettiest to look at, much like my boy here, but there's no harm in 'em. They're all slow and soft-hearted. Why do you think they live up in the mountains like that? 'Cuz they're scared of what humans try to do to 'em, that's why. Even Jinenji's father. He wanted to stay down here with us, but they chased him out."

Kagome looked from Jinenji to his mother, both of their expressions growing distant at the mention of his father. During her spiritual training as a child Kagome had heard stories of the violence of the oni from Kaede. She had heard them described as hulking and hideous and even hungry for the flesh of human beings in some instances. She had even seen a few of them among the youkai swarms that had attacked her village, just as fearsome as they had been made to sound. That, however, meant little, considering that the youkai that joined the swarms were those who had given themselves over to their darker impulses.

Nor had she ever seen a single oni among the youkai clans within the court. That would make sense if they truly were as reticent as Jinenji's mother claimed. And if Jinenji himself was any indication, it was not at all hard to believe that the oni were gentle and timid beings.

Meaning that her teachings and the villagers were wrong. Meaning that the villagers had been tormenting Jinenji and his family without cause for years. Kagome blinked, her heart sinking in her chest as she looked to them.

"I…I'm so sorry," she said softly, gaze dropping to the hands folded in her lap. "I had no idea."

Jinenji's mother shrugged, affecting apathy.

"Nothing you can do for us now," she said dismissively. "'Sides, his father's a coward. Didn't belong down here with people. Didn't have the backbone for it."

Jinenji shifted uncomfortably at the mention of his father, attempting to curl further in on himself.

"Had you ever considered…sending Jinenji-san to live with his father?" Kagome suggested gently. "I'm sure it would be difficult for you to be parted from him, but perhaps he would be safer there without the threat of the villagers and-"

But Jinenji was shaking his head frantically, a tremor going through him. His mother shook her head, as well, reaching out to pat his arm.

"You think we never tried that?" she said to Kagome. "Soon's he was born and I saw how much he looked like them, I thought it'd be best for him to live among the oni. For all their usual gentleness, though, they'd no problem with being cruel to a hanyou. They didn't want him anymore than the villagers did, and his father was too weak to defend him. So I took him back. He's my son. No one's more fit to protect him than me."

Kagome looked at the pair for a long moment, watching as Jinenji offered his mother a small, grateful smile. She grinned faintly in return, patting his arm once more. Kagome sat up straighter.

"I want to help you," she said, resolved. "I want to make certain that the villagers never try to hurt either of you again."

Jinenji's mother turned to her, the wrinkles on her brow deepening in a frown. Jinenji's eyes turned to her, too, some small light entering them.

"That's all well and good to say, but I'd like to see how you plan to do it," Jinenji's mother said, though there was more wariness than anger in her tone. "Either you destroy them or you destroy us. I don't see it ending any other way."

"No, Ma," Jinenji spoke up softly, bulbous eyes still fixed on Kagome. "Kagome will do it. I know she will."

His mother blinked at him, surprised. It was the most assertive Kagome had seen him be. She smiled at him, touched by the show of confidence.

"Naïve boy," his mother muttered without venom, shaking her head before turning back to Kagome expectantly. "Well, then, let's hear this grand plan of yours."

"I…I don't exactly have one yet," Kagome admitted, her smile twisting sheepishly. "But I'll go to visit the oni first. My companions have already gone ahead of me to them, and I know that they have lived on these lands for a long time. Perhaps they'll have some idea what it is that's really been taking the people from the village."

She bowed to them both before rising to stand.

"If you'll excuse me, I want to get started as quickly as possible," she said, hoping Sango's group was taking long enough to observe before simply attacking the oni. "I promise I'll come back to explain once everything has been sorted out."

"Yeah, yeah," the old woman said, waving a hand in dismissal. "Go on. Jinenji'n' I've got work to do. No more time to be wasted with fancy courtiers. Don't come back unless you manage to get something done."

Kagome nodded, not overly bothered by her brusqueness now. After so many years of suffering it only made sense that she would be skeptical.

Jinenji lifted a hand, waving meekly after her as she exited the hut. She waved in return, offering him a reassuring smile before she left.

She returned to her mount, untying it and mounting up swiftly. Speaking with Jinenji and his mother had not taken too long, so she doubted she was very far behind the rest of her companions.

* * *

Her youkai mount got her up the mountain relatively quickly, and it was not long at all before she could sense both the mounts of her companions and some foreign youki that she did not recognize.

Something felt wrong, though. She urged her mount on faster.

The scene that met her as she crashed through the mountain brush into the steppes of the Oni Clan's village was the exact thing she had been hoping to prevent.

Miroku and Sango stood at the head of the group, hiraikotsu and shakujou poised. The rest of the taiji-ya flanked them, each of them ready to move at a word from Sango. Facing them were a mass of oni, all of them even larger in size than Jinenji and vaguely humanoid in shape.

Their skin ranged every earthy hue imaginable, some with horns, some with multiple eyes, some with only a single eye, and yet others had tails. They made as fearsome a sight as any of Kagome's teachings had led her to believe, but they seemed to be completely frozen in the face of her companions.

Stranger to see than this, though, was the small child in the hands of one of the largest oni. It was unquestionably human, wailing loudly enough to echo across the mountain slope. It was the child that the villagers said had gone missing recently.

Sango hefted hiraikotsu higher, signaling with her free hand for the taiji-ya to close ranks. They did, moving forward to form a tight half-circle about herself and Miroku.

"Hand the child over to us!" Sango demanded. "The villagers have told us what you have done! Surrender the child or we will not hesitate to cut you down where you stand!"

The oni holding the child stood unmoving, his single eye rolling wildly in fright. He made no move to release the crying child. Sango scowled, and with a jolt Kagome watched as she hefted hiraikotsu higher to distract attention away from her free hand as it slid her wakizashi partially from its sheathe.

With a cry Sango dropped the larger weapon, unsheathed the blade in one smooth motion, and sprang forward toward the oni holding the child. The oni started, stumbling backward with a cry, and Kagome made a split second decision.

She urged her mount forward, the youkai darting forward to get between the two. Her mount reared, frightened by the flash of Sango's blade and the bellow that came from the terrified oni, and Kagome lost her grip on its reins.

She shrieked, tumbling down off the youkai's back and bracing against the impact. Her fall was broken abruptly by some pressure against her back, jolting her upwards. All around her she could hear cries of confusion, the oni bellowing and her companions calling out to her. She opened her eyes, pressing a hand to her pounding heart.

"Let go of her, you monster!" Sango shouted, and Kagome realized suddenly that it was the oni who had caught her.

She blinked up at him, her feet dangling just above the ground, and he returned her look with one of absolute terror. Out of the corner of her eye she saw movement, Sango tensing to spring once more with blade in hand.

"Stop!" Kagome cried, turning to her. "Please wait, Sango!"

The woman blinked, halting dead in her tracks.

"It's a misunderstanding," Kagome continued, speaking loudly enough for all of her companions to hear. "Please just wait a moment. It is a misunderstanding, isn't it?"

The last bit was directed up at the oni holding her. He nodded slowly, his single eye wide as a full moon. She could feel the tremors running through him in the hand that held her.

"That child is from the village, right?" she asked, to which he managed another nod. "Why do you have it, then?"

The oni frowned, looking down at the squalling child.

"We found it," he said, voice low and slow. "Someone left it at the foot of the mountain."

"Why did you not return it to the villagers?" Sango asked, sword still in hand.

The oni shook his head frantically, some of the oni behind him mirroring the gesture.

"They always attack us," he said. "We don't go there. Here."

He brought the hand holding the child over to Kagome, offering it to her. Kagome took the child from his hand, cooing softly to it in the hopes that it might calm down as it clung to her. The oni then lowered them both to the ground, backing away warily.

"P-Please go now," he said. "We don't want to fight."

The oni began to retreat back into their village.

"Wait!" Sango called after them, hurriedly sheathing her blade. "I apologize! I did not know-!"

The oni ignored her, continuing to lumber away from them. Sango made as if to follow them, but Kagome stopped her with a hand on her arm. She offered her the quickly quieting child and Sango took it, frowning.

"What is going on, Kagome-chan?" Miroku asked, coming up beside them.

Kagome shook her head.

"I'll explain in a bit," she said hurriedly. "First I need to go and see if I can get them to talk to me."

"I will come with you-" Miroku began to offer, but Kagome shook her head.

"The less people there are, the more inclined they will likely be to speak. They are already frightened enough of us as it is."

"You should not go alone," Sango protested, dandling the child to keep it quiet. "Think of what they might do to you after what we nearly did to them."

"They don't want to hurt anyone," Kagome replied. "Just think. Why didn't they attack just now? Why do they live isolated up here like this? Please, just wait here for me. If you feel that I am taking too long, then you can come after me, alright?"

She turned, waving to them and starting off at a run before they could voice any further protests. The oni had made it to a large clearing in the midst of their village by the time that she caught up with them, the sizable fire-pit there indicating that it was likely where they held their gatherings.

They huddled there together, all of them still looking rather shaken. One of the females on the fringe of the group caught sight of her as she slowed to approach them, starting up with a cry.

In an instant the rest of the group was up, watching her warily and preparing to run. Kagome halted in her approach, raising her hands to show that they were empty.

"I have come alone," she said. "And I mean you no harm. I only want to ask a few questions."

A low murmuring started up among the group, the oni looking wide eyed to one another, and slowly the largest among them stepped forward to face her. Her skin was a brown deeper than the color of the earth, her hair long and stringy where it hung from her perfectly round head.

"We are grateful for what you did," she said, inclining her head. "But we've no wish to deal with humans. Please leave now. We don't want to fight, but we will if you force us."

She inclined her head once more before turning to go. The rest of the oni seemed to take this as a signal, following her lead as she moved further up the steps they had carved into the side of the mountain long ago.

"Wait!" Kagome called, taking a few steps after them. "Please, I only want to talk! I want to help-"

But, save a few backward looks, the oni ignored her. She dared not follow them any further for fear that she truly would provoke them. There had to be something, though. Some way to just get them to talk to her…

An idea struck her.

"What about Jinenji?" she called after them, knowing that there had to be at least one among them whose attention would be caught by the name. "I'm trying to help him! The villagers are blaming him for all of this, too!"

Nothing happened. The oni did not slow in the slightest. Kagome bit her lip, looking after them. If they would not help her, then she had no clue as to how to proceed from here.

Suddenly, though, she noticed one of the oni among the group. He was slowing his pace, falling to the back of the group. Bit by bit he slowed until he was lagging well behind the rest. When they had moved a good way ahead of him, he turned and came back down the slope towards her.

He stopped several lengths from her, head bowed as he shifted anxiously. He was a good deal smaller than the others, only a head and a half taller than herself, his skin the color of burnt umber and a horn protruding from between his rather mournful looking round eyes. The gentle aura was the same.

"Are you Jinenji's father?" she asked softly, afraid that she might frighten him away with any sudden move.

He nodded, his gaze fixed on the ground.

"I won't hurt you," she said, taking a small step towards him. "You have my word. I only want to ask you a few questions."

He glanced up at her and then back down, hands balling at his sides.

"The others attacked us," he murmured lowly.

"They misunderstood," Kagome said. "And they are very sorry for it."

He raised his head just enough that he could meet her eyes, the sadness and resignation she saw there causing her chest to tighten.

"Everyone misunderstands," he said. "No one asks. No one cares."

Kagome blinked up at him, momentarily at a loss. Her teachings had taught her that the oni were violent and frightening creatures. Sango's had taught her the same. The villagers believed it without question. He was right. No one had asked. No one had cared enough to understand. They were big and hulking and appeared inhuman and no one had cared to look any further.

"What…what about Jinenji's mother?" Kagome said after a moment, tucking away her darker musings for when she had the time to entertain them. "She told me how much she loved you. She didn't misunderstand, did she?"

He blinked down at her, some faint light entering his gaze.

"No," he said, the warmth of nostalgia coloring the word. "She is…a good person with a strong heart. I want to…to be strong, too. I want…to help my son for once."

"You can," Kagome said, eager to assure him. "You can do him a great kindness. Just tell me, have you any idea what it is that has really been terrorizing the villagers?"

Jinenji's father tensed, his shoulders coming up protectively. He hesitated for several long moments before giving one single, small nod. Kagome perked up, having half-expected the oni not to know either.

"Will you tell me, then?" she pressed. "If you tell me, then-"

But he was already shaking his head before she could finish. He wrung his hands hard together, biting down on his lower lip. Kagome frowned, taking another small step towards them.

"Please-"

"It…will hurt us, if I tell you," he said. "It's strong. It will hurt us."

He closed his mouth tight, shaking his head with finality. Kagome gazed up at him, feeling frustration begin to prickle up within her at the absolute defeat in his stance.

"What about wanting to help?" she said, unable to keep some of the sharpness from her tone.

He flinched.

"I want…to help," he mumbled feebly, though he looked like he wanted nothing more than to curl into a ball and hide.

"Then help!" Kagome snapped, glaring up at him.

He blanched, some of the color draining from his skin. Kagome took a breath, trying to rein in her frustration.

"Please," she said more softly, reaching out a hand to touch one of his lightly. "If ever your son needed you, he needs you now. Whatever this thing is, it's already hurting the villagers. And, in turn, they are hurting you and Jinenji. We can end all this now, though. You just have to tell me."

He frowned down at her hand, so small by comparison, as if mystified at the sight. Slowly his eyes moved to her face, studying it as if seeing her for the first time.

"You're…like her," he said softly. "Good, and strong. I'm sorry I'm…so weak. I'm sorry."

His bulbous eyes welled with tears, trickling down his elongated face. He murmured his apologies over and over intermixed with the name of his son, his shoulders shaking. Kagome gripped his hand, swallowing back the tightness in her throat.

"It's not too late," she pressed. "You always have a choice. You can always choose to do it differently. So make the choice. For Jinenji, if you can't do it for yourself."

He sniffled noisily, brow furrowing as he blinked down at her. Kagome met his eyes steadfastly, silently urging him on.

"Centipede," he hiccuped, the word scarcely intelligible. "Female centipede. Her children…take the villagers."

'To eat' was the part of the sentence that went unspoken, though it was clear enough to Kagome. Her stomach turned. All those people over all those years…

"Where?" Kagome pressed. "I didn't sense anything in the village."

He shook his head, sniffling and trembling all over.

"Underground," he said. "Her nest is old. The village was built over it. We tried…we tried to tell them, but they yelled and chased us out."

Kagome's frown deepened at the last bit, anger flickering up inside her for a brief moment. They had tried to warn the villagers. They had tried to prevent all of this, and the villagers had not even thought to listen. They had essentially brought everything onto themselves, hurting Jinenji and the oni in the process.

Kagome sighed, shaking her head. It would not do to lay blame now. Everyone was suffering here. The best she could do at this point was to show them the truth and hope that they could all move forward somehow. There was no time to waste, though.

She patted Jinenji's father's hand, offering him a bracing smile.

"Thank you," she said. "You have been very brave. My companions and I will take care of the rest. If all works out as I hope, you will soon have no reason to fear the villagers. Perhaps then you can go to see your son."

She released him, dipping in a small bow before turning to start off quickly. She thought she might have heard him call out after her, but she knew she did not have much time. Night would be falling soon, and the centipede youkai had obviously lost her latest intended meal somehow. She was almost certain that she would come out to hunt for a replacement come nightfall. Before that they would need to make some sort of plan.

Her companions were waiting on the far edge of the village, obviously trying to be as inoffensive as possible after what had happened. Sango and Miroku started forward at the sight of her, Sango still holding the village child.

"Kagome-chan, what is going on?" Sango asked.

"It's a bit of a long story," Kagome said. "But suffice it to say for now that the Oni Clan are not the ones who have been taking people from the village. Rather, they are afraid of the villagers. They live up here to avoid them. The 'witch' and her son that the villagers told us of are merely a woman and her hanyou son, also innocent. It's a centipede youkai and her children, living beneath the village, that are responsible. One of the oni told me so."

Sango blinked, a frown tugging at her lips as she listened.

"I…when I saw the child, I did not think to wait or watch…" she murmured, half to herself. "All I have ever been taught about them…"

"It seems that even the accepted teachings can be wrong," Kagome said gently. "Believe me, I likely would have done the same thing, Sango-chan."

"I wish I could apologize, though," Sango said, glancing over Kagome's shoulder into the village.

"Likely the kindest thing we can do for them now is to show the villagers the truth of the matter," Miroku said, echoing Kagome's earlier thoughts.

Sango gave a curt nod, though she avoided looking at him.

"We should hurry," Kagome put in, partly to keep tension from growing up between them yet again. "My guess is that this child was to be the centipede youkai's latest victim. She will need something else to feed to her children, and she will likely come out tonight in search of it."

"Let's go, then," Sango said. "Centipede youkai try to stay underground as much as possible, so she will have a number of tunnels around the village. We will need enough time to locate them all."

She turned, whistling sharply enough to catch the attention of her companions.

"Mount up," she ordered. "We are returning the village. Quickly!"

Her tone brooked no hesitation, and in moments they were all on their way back down the mountain into the village.

* * *

When they arrived in the village, Sango was quick to divide the group up and delegate tasks to them. Haru and Shippou had come to meet them, and she instructed them to return the child to the villagers and explain what was going on to the best of their ability. The rest of them Sango ordered to split up and search the woods surrounding the village.

They needed to find the centipede's tunnels and report back before nightfall. Sango gave them an approximate radius to search within, listing the sorts of places the tunnels might be hidden before sending them off.

Kagome was with Noriko and two other male taiji-ya, combing the woods on the west side of the village. It did not take them long to uncover the first tunnel, hidden under the tangled roots at the base of a large tree. The second one they would not have found but for the sharp eyes of one of the men, noticing a trail of disturbed earth leading to a large rock. It looked as if something had been dragged through the woods, and when the rock was pushed aside it revealed a second tunnel. They found a third tunnel hidden in the thick of several bushes before completing the search of their section and returning to report to Sango.

All told the group managed to find just under twenty tunnels surrounding the village, giving the youkai easy access to almost every corner of it. They all circled up as Sango sketched an outline in the dirt of the village and the tunnels, explaining what her plan was.

Just before nightfall they were all to split up once more, returning to the sites of the tunnels. As night fell they were each to drop several of the taiji-ya's poison bombs down into the tunnels. The fumes would spread, reaching the centipede's lair and forcing her either to escape through one of the tunnels or to suffocate slowly beneath the earth.

Two people each would be designated to watch each tunnel in case it was the one the youkai emerged from, leaving one extra person. Sango decided that Kagome, as the extra, should return to the village to stand guard there and make certain the villagers did not enter the woods until morning. Kagome agreed.

Sango gave the order and the group split up once more, agreeing to meet in the village come morning when everything was over. Kagome returned to the village to find most of the villagers milling about outside of their huts, anxiety hanging heavy over them. They swarmed around her as she entered, Shippou and Haru hardly able to reach her through the chattering mass.

They demanded to know what was going on and what had happened and what exactly Haru had meant when he had told them that the oni were not to blame for the disappearing villagers. At this Haru shot her a sheepish look, shrugging a bit exasperatedly.

It took a bit of time, but with some effort Kagome was able to calm them down enough to explain everything. Despite her best efforts, though, she could not make them believe that the oni were not responsible somehow. They were convinced and no one could tell them otherwise.

Kagome had to bite her tongue to keep from snapping at them, knowing only too well now who it was hurting. As the sun sank toward the horizon she gave up all attempts to reason with them, figuring that once everything was over she would be able to find some indisputable proof to show them.

She shifted her focus, corralling them all in the center of the village. The further they were from the fringes, the less likely they were to be hurt should the worst occur. Shippou and Haru helped her to keep them together and relatively calm as the sun slowly set, darkness bringing with it silence in the surrounding woods.

Kagome stood on the outer edge of the group, ears straining, as darkness set in fully. For several long moments there was no sound save the chirping of insects and the cooing of nocturnal birds, and Kagome relaxed. It seemed the centipede youkai was going to die quietly beneath the earth, after all.

Haru, Shippou riding on his shoulder, came to stand beside her.

"The villagers have lit a fire, if you'd like to come warm yourself, Kagome-sama," he said.

Kagome nodded, offering him a smile as thanks. Shippou leapt from his shoulder to her own as she turned to join the group, chattering animatedly in her ear about the toy top that one of the little boys in the village had given him. She was so focused on trying to follow his rather convoluted narrative of the event that she nearly missed the first of the tremors.

The second sent her stumbling, the villagers crying out around her. A low rumble was filling the air, seeming to come from everywhere at once.

"W-What is it?" Haru cried at her side.

Kagome pulled her bow from her quiver, notching an arrow in one smooth motion as her eyes moved automatically to scan the woods around them. There was nothing. Absolutely nothing.

The rumbling, however, continued to grow louder. Something sparked across her sixth sense. Kagome went cold with horror.

"Run!" she screamed, turning to the villagers. "Everyone, run! As far from here as you can!"

They scattered like startled birds, crying and screaming.

"Haru!" she said, spinning to face the man who, despite his obvious fear, had remained at her side. "The woods! Go fetch the taiji-ya back here!"

He nodded, hesitating for only a moment before shooting off towards the pitch-black forest.

The rumbling grew louder. Kagome took off at a run, Shippou clinging to her shoulder. Too late, though.

The earth beneath her feet exploded, sending them flying. For the space of several breathless moments she was airborne, arching through space. Pain exploded behind her closed eyelids as she landed, her shoulder jarring hard against the ground.

She groaned, rolling over and struggling blindly to raise herself. With a jolt of pure panic she realized that the kitsune and her bow were no longer with her, the arrows that had been in her quiver scattered all around her.

"Shippou!" she called, forcing herself to stand. "Shippou!"

Her voice caught in her throat, her eyes widening as they locked with the eerily human face of the thing towering several lengths above her. The centipede youkai.

Apparently Jinenji's father had not been exaggerating when he had said that her lair was directly beneath the village.

Before Kagome could so much as blink it was diving towards her, jaw cracking and unhinging grotesquely to reveal teeth like jagged stone knives. A choked cry escaped Kagome as she stumbled back a step, hands groping instinctively for a bow she no longer had.

Something flew up from behind her, lodging solidly in the youkai's gaping maw. It swerved, surprised as the giant spinning top nearly choked it, and Kagome spun on her heel.

"Shippou!" she called, seeing the kitsune only a few lengths behind her and clutching her bow in one hand.

She hurriedly scooped up several of her scattered arrows and made a dash towards him, not breaking stride as she tugged him up into her arms. Behind them an almighty crack sounded, the splintering of Shippou's illusionary top.

"It's coming!" he yelped, watching over her shoulder as she made a mad dash for higher ground.

A moment later a shrieking roar and the rumbling crash of a hundred legs beating the earth confirmed this. Adrenaline pulsing hotly through her, Kagome put on one final burst of speed. She swerved to throw the youkai, dashing up the village's only hill towards the headman's hut that sat atop it. Villagers swarmed everywhere like frightened livestock, uncertain where to go and afraid to leave the village, and she prayed they would have the good sense to get out of the thing's way as she at last gained the top of the hill.

She dropped Shippou and her excess arrows, raising her bow and notching one quickly. The centipede youkai was barreling up the hill just behind her, its hundred legs working furiously and red eyes fixed on her from inside what bizarrely mirrored the face of a beautiful human woman. Kagome held her stance, eyes narrowing as she attempted to line up the shot.

The thing's jaw unhinged once more, gaping wide, and Kagome released. The arrow flared to life, briefly illuminating knife-like teeth as it sailed past the gaping jaws and into the monster's body.

It shrieked, thrashing as the purifying light dissolved it section by section from the inside out. In the next instant it was gone, nothing left of it save ash fluttering to the earth.

Kagome released a shaky breath, lowering her bow slowly. Below her the villagers quieted somewhat, their movements stilling as they realized that the threat was gone. Behind her Kagome could hear Shippou let out a whooping cry of success.

In the distance, around the spot where the youkai had erupted from, she could see four huts burning, the flames bright against the night sky. The emergence of the youkai had scattered the tinder of the fire the villagers had built up, setting the huts alight. Thankfully there was little in the way of wind that night, but Kagome knew they needed to be put out quickly to keep the fire from spreading.

She took a deep breath and released it, recollecting herself.

"Please," she called, loudly enough to be heard by the villagers below her. "I need those of you who are able to fetch water. We must-"

She cut herself short, a flicker of movement catching her eye. The glow from the burning huts illuminated the edges of the hole from which the youkai emerged.

Something was moving within the darkness. A chill crawled across Kagome's flesh.

As she watched several centipede youkai writhed up from the depths of the earth, grotesquely human faces peering about in the dim light offered by the fires. Several more followed them as they crawled up out into the village, searching.

The centipede youkai's children.

"Run…" she said, the word a rasping whisper as it left her throat.

She cleared her throat, yelling down to the villagers, "Run! Into the forest, as far as you can get! There are more of them!"

In the darkness below her they echoed her cry, the group breaking into a flurry of motion once more. Kagome turned to face Shippou, dropping her knees to collect the rest of her arrows as she spoke hurriedly to him.

"I need you to go with them, Shippou," she said, shoving the arrows into the quiver resting against her back.

"But, Kagome-!"

"Please, Shippou," she cut him off, meeting his eyes pleadingly. "They need someone to light their path and keep them safe in the woods. I'm counting on you to do this."

He hesitated a moment, wide eyes searching hers, before giving a sharp nod. Without a word he dashed off down the hillside, kitsune-bi sparking to life above him as he made his way towards the fleeing villagers.

She shifted her attention back to the youkai, raising her bow and reaching back for an arrow. The monsters continued to emerge endlessly from the hole in the earth, the first one who had emerged seeming to have caught the scent of human flesh. They were crawling decisively in the direction that the villagers were fleeing, bodies winding and twisting rapidly along the earth.

Kagome bit down on her lip hard, well aware that she did not have enough arrows to deal with them all. The best she could do was distract them long enough for the villagers to escape and hope Haru managed to find the taiji-ya soon.

She notched an arrow, drawing the string back and taking aim at the youkai leading the charge. She let it fly, hitting and dissolving the centipede in a flash of pearlescent blue light. The ones behind it pulled up short in surprise, hissing loudly.

"Up here!" she shouted, already notching the second arrow. "Come on! This way!"

She knew they would come. Her spiritual abilities made her the bigger, if not the easier, meal.

Several sets of red eyes found her through the darkness and she waited, holding off firing again until she was certain they had shifted course. Slowly they turned towards her, the mass of them starting towards the hill. Kagome fired again, incinerating the one closest to the foot of the hill.

She reached back for another arrow as the others sped up, heart jumping into her throat as she realized she only had four more left. She notched one of them, pulse beginning to echo in her ears as she took aim.

Terrified screaming rent the air, freezing both Kagome and the youkai. It was the villagers.

Kagome could see them, yelling and clutching their children as they ran back towards the village. Behind them lumbered a number of the Oni Clan, emerging from the woods all around, and Kagome cursed.

"Stop!" she screamed. "They won't hurt you! Don't come this way!"

But they did not hear her and it was already too late. The youkai, realizing that there was a whole mass of easier prey coming right towards them, had turned away from the hill, making their way towards the screaming.

Kagome groaned, taking off down the hill. Her only thought was to get between the youkai and the villagers before they collided.

The villagers came to a halt, eyes wide and rolling like cornered animals as they realized that they were trapped. The centipede youkai continued their rapid advance towards them, and Kagome's heart jolted as she spotted a stray child on the far fringe of the group. His wailing cries were drowned out in the chaos of the scene, and one youkai's jaw cracked open unnaturally as it made for him. With several lengths between them it lunged.

Kagome dove for the boy, wrapping herself protectively around him and bracing for impact. Screams, cries, and thundering steps echoed around her, but no impact came. Her eyes slid open.

In front of her a figure loomed tall, thick limbs straining as it desperately held back the flailing monster. It was Jinenji.

All around him other oni had come forward and were wrestling with the snapping, undulating beasts.

"That's my boy!" called a hoarse voice above the clamor. "You get 'em, Jinenji!"

Kagome rose, steering the trembling boy back towards the group as she met the blazing eyes of Jinenji's mother. The old woman held a torch high, illuminating the pale, stunned faces of the crowd behind her.

"What-?" Kagome began, her head fairly spinning.

"No time for that!" the old woman snapped. "Get in there and help my boy!"

Kagome blinked, nodding. She turned back to the fray and notched an arrow, taking aim at the centipede youkai Jinenji was grappling with. It was a clean shot despite their struggles, the youkai dissolving in his hands. He turned, blinking slowly at her before offering a crooked smile.

"Kagome!" a voice cried.

Something went flying above her head, severing the head of a youkai that had managed to creep between the wall of oni before whipping back around. Sango landed beside her, catching hiraikotsu effortlessly from astride a transformed Kirara.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

Kagome nodded.

"They came up from under the village," she explained in a rush. "The oni came to help."

Sango nodded.

"Stay close and protect the villagers," she ordered, "We will take care of the rest."

She spurred Kirara forward, posting up on her back to send hiraikotsu flying ahead of her into the fray. Distantly Kagome could see some of her other companions emerging from the woods, those that Haru had not gotten to drawn by the blaze that had now ignited several of the huts.

The oni, her companions, and the seemingly endless stream of centipede youkai swiftly became entangled in a chaotic mass, their clashes back-lit by the hellish glow of the flames. Kagome moved back to stand before the villagers, raising both hands with palms out before her.

She drew a deep breath, eyes sliding shut as she focused on releasing the energy through her hands. Slowly she felt her spiritual energy seeping out and she pushed harder, willing and shaping it to form a small barrier. Her arms shook slightly with the effort of holding it without the use of a medium, but she was relatively sure she could at least hold it until the battle was over.

Behind her the headman pushed forward through the crowd, coming to stand beside her. He watched the battle rage with wide eyes, his features pale.

"Miko-sama…what is going on?" he asked faintly.

Despite the grave circumstances Kagome could not help but feel a flicker of satisfaction.

"Just watch," she panted. "And see what the truth is for yourself."

The battle continued for some time, though the outcome became largely inevitable by the time that all of Kagome's companions arrived. They were trained to exterminate and moved with precision, in a stark contrast to the confused and already poison-weakened mass of centipede youkai. The oni were also surprisingly strong and dogged fighters, for all that they were slow and clumsy.

Still the centipede youkai managed to do a good deal of damage in their desperate struggles, razing a number of huts and injuring some the oni and taiji-ya. Several of them broke through long enough to come after the villagers, but Kagome managed to hold her barrier and they either disintegrated upon impact or were torn away by the oni.

When the fighting died down at last, the wreckage of the village was extensive. Kagome dropped her barrier, her robes damp with sweat and her limbs trembling with exhaustion, as the weary combatants made their way slowly to where they villagers were huddled. Jinenji's mother was the first to rush forward, torch held high as she met her limping son half way.

There was a sizable laceration across his forehead and blood dripped down his leg from where a centipede youkai had sunk its fangs in.

"Foolish boy!" she muttered, though without any real heat to the words. "Look at what you've done to yourself! Kneel down! I'll take care of you."

He knelt down obediently, wincing at the pressure on his leg, and she pulled a large bundle of herbs from the front of her robes. She paused, glaring around at them all as they looked on in silence.

"What're you all doing staring like a bunch of nitwits?" she snapped. "Injured, line up and I'll treat you! The rest of you, there's still fires to be put out! Get to it!"

This seemed to break the villagers from their daze. They moved tentatively towards the oni as the injured moved to seek treatment. Kagome attempted to rise from where she was kneeling, but quickly found that her legs were not willing to comply in the endeavor. Her entire body felt numb and strangely boneless.

Haru hurried to her side, Shippou with him. He knelt down, wrapping her arm around his shoulders and helping her to stand just in time to see the largest of the oni and the village headman come together.

They looked at one another in silence for several long moments, both obviously uncertain.

"Why?" the headman asked at last, as if he could not manage any more than that.

The oni, the large female who had addressed Kagome on the mountainside and who appeared to be the clan head, blinked slowly at him before answering.

"These are…our lands, too," she said simply.

The headman's eyes widened slightly. After a moment he smiled, the expression a strange mix of shame and gratitude.

"You're right," he said softly, meeting the oni's eyes. "They are."

And he bowed, the gesture slow and deep and deliberate. When he rose, the oni offered him a lopsided grin, her large eyes bright.

Looking on, Kagome breathed a sigh of relief. It was not the end. It was hardly even a beginning really. But it was something.

They likely had a rocky, winding path ahead of them before they could reach any true understanding, especially considering all the deep-rooted misunderstanding that lay between them. But it was a start. And suddenly, Kagome thought she might understand what the former Tennō had been at all those years ago.

* * *

Kagome and her companions ended up remaining in the village for two more days, both to give those among them with injuries a bit of time to recover and to help organize the reconstruction of the village.

After all that had happened it took almost no effort on Kagome's part to secure the support of both the village headman and the Southern Oni Clan. The headman even invited the oni to try moving closer to the village, if they would like. Food and water were harder to come by high on the slopes of the mountain, after all, and the headman promised them peace and support if they decided to do so. The oni tentatively agreed to consider the proposition, still too wary after all that they had been subjected to to agree immediately, and for the time being worked to help rebuild the village.

From them Kagome learned that it had been at the absolute insistence of Jinenji's father that they had come to the village's aid. He had convinced them that something was going to happen, and that it would likely be the last chance they would ever get to clear their name and end their constant conflict with the villagers. The oni were not beings inclined towards confrontation, but there were some things that they were willing to stand for.

Observing Jinenji's father, though, Kagome could not help but suspect that he had not been entirely forthcoming with the other oni. He had said to her that he wanted to help his son and, watching him hover awkwardly around Jinenji and his mother, she was almost certain that that had been his real objective. The arrival of herself and her companions had merely given him the opportunity after all these years.

As for Jinenji, no one among the villagers or the oni seemed to know how to approach him. Whether it was guilt over the fact that he had taken the brunt of the abuse from both sides or hesitation over the fact that he was a hanyou, Kagome was not certain. Despite this, though, Kagome did not sense any genuine animosity towards him from anyone. He had saved lives on both sides during the battle and, given time, she was certain that he would gain their full acceptance.

Before setting out Kagome went to pay him and his mother one last visit, finding them out in the small field behind their hut. Jinenji's mother stood overseeing him as he worked at chopping and stacking wood, to be used in the repairs of the village. Kagome called a greeting to her, coming to stand at her side. She received little more than a glance and a brusque nod in return, but she knew better than to be put off by it.

"How are his wounds?" she asked, glancing out at the boy as he labored without any seeming difficulty.

"Almost healed already," the woman replied. "Youkai blood in 'im works wonders. What're you here for, anyway?"

"My companions and I are setting out today."

This caught her full attention. She glanced at Kagome from the corner of her eye before folding her arms over her chest with a huff.

"And I s'pose you expect some sort of thanks before you go?" she said, turning her gaze pointedly back out onto the field.

"No," Kagome replied, shaking her head. "Rather, I should thank you and Jinenji-san. Without your efforts that night I doubt I would even be here."

The old woman blinked, surprise registering across her weathered features. Her arms fell slowly to her sides, a frown lining her brow as she turned fully to face Kagome. She eyed her hard for several long moments, shifting indecisively. At last she practically launched herself forward, wrapping her arms about Kagome in a clumsy embrace.

"Thank you," she murmured, voice rougher than usual with emotion. "You've done more for him than you'll ever know."

She pulled back before Kagome could even process the action far enough to consider reciprocating. She cleared her throat loudly, her gaze turning back to Jinenji as he continued to labor away.

"Least he's got a chance now that his good-for-nothing father's around again. I always worried what'd happen when it came time for me to pass. I mean, with as long as he's gonna live, I can't be with him forever. Now at least he'll have his father."

She paused, her features softening somewhat as her eyes trailed after her son.

"There used to be days where I regretted having him," she said lowly, gaze growing distant. "Not 'cuz I didn't love him, mind you. It was 'cuz I couldn't imagine what sorta life he'd have. Not being one thing or the other. Hated for his human side and his youkai side. That kinda loneliness….I didn't want that for my boy."

She shook her head, some of the bitter nostalgia leaving her eyes.

"Maybe there's a chance for 'im, though," she continued with a shrug. "We're so different we scare each other, but if humans'n' youkai can begin to understand each other maybe one's like my Jinenji can be the links what bring us all together…"

She trailed off, her look thoughtful. After a moment she cleared her throat loudly, recollecting herself.

"Never mind all that nonsense," she snapped. "Just the ramblings of an old woman."

"No," Kagome protested, shaking her head. "Not at all. I understand. It would be wonderful if…if things could be that way."

She looked to Jinenji, but her mind was elsewhere. She thought of Inuyasha and the little he had told her of his childhood. Neither one thing nor the other. Hated. Lonely. She knew he had experienced all those things and more, without even a father or a mother to support him.

And suddenly it occurred to her that perhaps her eagerness and determination to help had not been entirely for Jinenji's sake. Perhaps, in some way, it had been another hanyou that she had been trying to help. At one time she had wanted little more than to be his friend, after all. To be his strength and support so that he would see he was not alone in the world.

No. That was not true. It was still what she wanted.

"You said you had a hanyou, too," Jinenji's mother said, as if she could read her thoughts.

Kagome hesitated a moment, surprised, before giving a small nod. The old woman eyed her, a certain knowingness in her gaze.

"Well, take good care of him, then," she said. "He's a lucky one to have you at his side."

Kagome could only look at her, wordless for a long moment. Her gaze fell to her feet.

"…Yeah."

* * *

She did not stay much longer after that. She informed Jinenji that she had to be going and he bid her a tearful farewell, timidly offering her a bundle of their home-grown medicinal herbs at the prodding of his mother. After another short good-bye to his mother she set off, feeling somehow lighter than she had in months.

To her surprise, she found Kohaku hovering around the front of Jinenji's hut, an anxious look on his face. Spotting her, he cried out.

"Kagome-sama!" he called. "Thank goodness I have found you! We must hurry!"

"Hurry?" Kagome echoed. "Is something wrong?"

He grabbed her hand, tugging her along behind him as he spoke. Kagome allowed herself to be led, alarmed. Ever since he had joined the group Kohaku had always been quiet and controlled. Shy, Sango had told her once, a timid boy from the time he was young, though he was a decent enough warrior when he was pressed. Even when the others had challenged Sango's leadership he had been quiet and kept his own counsel, though Sango had assured her that she did not hold a grudge over it. He had simply never been strong-willed enough to stand against others when he could avoid it.

Now, though, his normally inscrutable features were written over with anxiety.

"There is not much time to explain," he said in a rush. "But a man from a village nearby came to the headman just a bit ago. He is severely injured, and he says that there has been an attack by a youkai swarm on a village at the foot of Mount Hakurei. The other taiji-ya have gone ahead to do what they can. They asked me to find you and bring you along."

They reached the place where he had tied two mounts, saddled and ready on the far edge of the village. Kohaku mounted up swiftly and Kagome followed suit. They set off at a quick pace, both of them silent and focused as their mounts' strides ate up the distance.

Kagome's grip on her reins tightened as more and more of Mount Hakurei, just a ways to the west of Jinenji's village, came into sight above the tops of the trees. She could sense it. Even from a distance she could sense a powerful jyaki, one that was enough to turn her stomach and send chills racing along her flesh.

In tacit agreement the two urged their mounts on faster. They only slowed when the dense gathering of trees parted at last to reveal the foot of the mountain, Kagome's eyes scanning the area anxiously.

"The village must be on the other side of the mountain," Kagome called to Kohaku.

She started to spur her mount forward, but he brought her up short.

"Wait!" he called, dismounting. "I think I see something, Kagome-sama!"

He moved towards the foot of the mountain, and Kagome caught sight of what he spoke of. There was an opening there, scarcely more than a large crevasse, but a strange light emanated from it.

"Wait!" Kagome called after him, alarmed at the jyaki she could sense there. "Wait, Kohaku-sama! Don't go alone!"

She scrambled down from her mount, hurrying after him and pulling her bow from the quiver at her back. Kohaku stood just before the opening, his own kusari-gama ready in his hands.

"What is it?" he murmured lowly to her, his eyes wide.

"I'm not sure," Kagome replied softly, a shudder running through her as she felt a strong pulse of jyaki from inside. "Stand back, Kohaku-sama."

He did and she drew an arrow from her quiver, notching it. She situated herself squarely in front of the opening, drawing back her arm and lining up her shot. If she could hit the light squarely…

A blow to her head sent her sprawling, bow and arrow flying from her hands. A moment later something cold wrapped around her neck, forcing her up and back. She tried to cry out, but no sound would emerge as the thing tightened.

Her hands came up, scrabbling wildly to get some hold on the thing, but it was wrapped too tight for her to pry away. She choked, gasping for air, writhing and pulling in a blind panic.

"Calm yourself," a cool voice came from just behind her. "I do not intend to damage you more than is necessary."

Dark spots beginning to dance in her vision, Kagome craned her head to get a look at her assailant. Kohaku stood behind her, expression detached even as he pulled the chain of the kusari-gama tighter about her throat. She choked, air being forced from her. She could feel her fingers growing numb on the chain.

Behind him the light of day was disappearing, the mountain seeming to seal itself closed around them as he dragged her forward. In the fading light Kagome gaped at the boy, reaching a hand out to him in a last desperate plea.

He did not so much as blink, and she wondered suddenly if this was where she was to die. She managed to raise a hand, fumbling blindly at the front of her robes as her vision began to fade. At last her fist closed around it, and she clutched it tightly.

_Inuyasha..._

And then her world went black as the mountain closed around them and she slipped into unconsciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's our mini-history lesson/a few notes and terms:
> 
> -Miyasu: This is actually the name of Miroku's grandfather in the series, not his father. His father is left unnamed, though, so I thought I'd use this one.
> 
> -Kusari-gama: Kohaku's weapon in the series. Literally means 'chain-sickle' and looks exactly like it sounds.
> 
> -Mt. Hakurei: a fictional mountain in the Inuyasha series. Since it is fictional, it has no specific location geographically and thus I used it for my own purposes. More on this to come.
> 
> -ageha-chō: The mon (seal) of the Taira clan. Basically a butterfly native to Japan. Each clan has both a representative kami (which is also used as a seal from time to time) and some sort of object/animal that serves as a mon and appears as a common pattern among the clan.
> 
> -Oni: Often translated as 'devil', 'ogre', or 'troll' in English, these are some of the more blatantly threatening youkai in Japanese folklore. They come in various shapes and sizes, though they are generally tall, horned, and evil-looking. They are also said to enjoy the taste of human flesh in some stories. I, however, thought it might be interesting to turn such notoriously villainized youkai into…well, you read it. Also, in the series Jinenji's mother claimed that his father was some sort of hot, glowing youkai, but that always seemed weird to me as I thought Jinenji looked much more like an oni than anything else. Thus, this is what we got.


	25. Of Darkness and Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our mini-history lesson for today:
> 
> -Shinshoku: a priest of the Shintō faith. Also, adding O- as prefix to any noun (such as Shinshoku) denotes greatness or high status.
> 
> -Hana Ichi Monme: A Japanese children's game similar to Red Rover. Use Wikipedia to look up the rules/procedures if you feel so inclined.

* * *

The ceremony had been beyond reproach. Almost the entire court had turned out to attend, filling and overflowing the Buraku-in with such a multitude of colors and finery that they might have earned the envy of the kami themselves. The hall had been decorated with equal lavishness, strewn in the gold and crimson hues of the Tennō's ancestry.

Midoriko, in her position as O-miko, had presided jointly with the O-shinshoku over the ceremony, bestowing upon the couple the blessings of the kami over their union as they moved through the matrimonial rituals. A high-ranking houshi had also been in attendance to offer the blessings of the Buddhist sect.

Following the ceremony, the crowd had been moved to the En no Matsubara where a great banquet had been laid out. Musicians and performers of the highest order provided entertainment, and whatever they might think of the union no courtier at the end of the festivities could have spoken an unflattering word about the arrangement and execution of the elegant ceremony.

All of this, however, was merely for show, as the court would accept nothing short of a grand performance. The pair chiefly concerned in all of it cared little for the actual ceremony beyond making certain that it was carried off without any problems. To them, it was what came after that truly mattered.

That was why, as they sat together in the silence and semi-darkness of the room that had suddenly taken on such strange significance, there was a quiet glow of satisfaction about them despite the nervousness they both felt.

She, in her robes as white and pure as the light of the full moon, knelt on one side of the large futon. He, a sharp contrast in robes of deep black embroidered with gold, knelt on the opposite side. Only two small candles at the head of the futon illuminated the scene, but the picture of a couple newly wed could not have been clearer had the light of the midday sun shone down on it.

He was the first to make a move, reaching a tentative hand out across the seemingly untraversable expanse of the futon. The flush that lit her face at the gesture was one of pure pleasure. With a small smile she reached out in return, placing her hand in the confines of his much larger one.

“I'll be a good husband to you, Kikyou," he said with low earnestness, his eyes on their interlocked hands. "I swear I'll take care of you."

She nodded, her eyes bright on his face.

"It goes both ways," she said softly. "I will care for you, as well, Inuyasha. I want to be your support in all things. This-being your wife and your companion-I could…I could ask for nothing more than this in all the world. I…"

She hesitated, a faint tremor going through the hand that he held clutched in his. The sheen of tears brightened her eyes further, and she smiled even as she swallowed them back. He gripped her hand more firmly.

"I know, Kikyou," he said. "I get it. But it's fine now. It's all fine. You and me…we're in this together from now on."

She nodded, her eyes sliding shut. Slowly she leaned in, raising the hand that she held and pressing her cheek to it. His face softened, his eyes trailing over her bent form.

He reached up with his free hand, fingers dipping just beneath the neck of his robes. He pulled up a string of beads that hung there, fingering them for a moment before pulling them slowly over his head to fall to the floor. He tugged her gently to him.

"C'mere."

* * *

She blinked slowly as she came back to herself, even that small gesture hard to manage. Everything seemed to be consumed by a thick haze. Even her thoughts dissolved into mist as soon as they began to form in her head. She could not recall where she was. How she had gotten there. She could scarcely remember her own name.

Her chest ached sharply, though. She tried to press her hand to it and found that that limb was also weighted down.

"They looked happy, did they not?" a voice came suddenly, seemingly from both in and outside of her head. Save the ache in her chest, it was the only thing that was clear of the haze.

"I suppose that is the way of newlyweds, though," the voice continued musingly. "Still, it seems rather cruel of him to forget you so completely, does it not? Especially when you have been working so hard on his behalf, Kagome."

Kagome. She realized suddenly that that was her name. With it several other things seemed to emerge out of the fog. His name, the man who she had seen, was Inuyasha, and she loved him. She loved him very much, and he had forgotten all about her. She was certain he must have, judging from how happy he had looked. The ache sharpened.

"But I suppose he has already proved how little he truly cares for you, has he not?" the voice continued, the words so loud inside her head that she was not sure if they were her own thoughts or something else. "He let you go. If he had cared at all for you, he would have asked you to stay. But he simply let you go. Everyone always lets you go. No one cares enough to ask you to stay."

No. Like a brief spark scattering the mist, Kagome had a sudden inkling that this was not right. She had asked to leave, and he-

"He is happy," the voice interrupted, dissolving her thoughts once more. "He is with her now. Forever. He is happy and he has forgotten you."

The two of them, bathed in the glow of the candles and their own contentment, sprang vividly to mind once more. Her chest hurt so much it was difficult to draw breath. But there was something else…something hovering just out of her reach…

"You need to rest, Kagome," the voice said gently. "You are tired and confused. Rest, and you will be able to think more clearly."

She found herself being drawn inexorably back into the darkness of sleep. She could not gather the energy to resist.

"The hanyou was a good entry point, but there is still a great part of her soul that she is keeping back. Give me time. Now that I have opened her up, digging deeper should be a simple matter."

* * *

Her mother was crying. Her mother often cried over little things -she was a bit of a crybaby, as her father used to joke- but never like this. For the first time in her life, as they stood watching the pyre on which her father's body was burning, Kagome thought she might know what heartbreak looked like. She held her mother's hand tightly, her own eyes dry.

Faintly she could hear Kaede, newly come to their village, speaking to her mother. Something about the will of the kami and the place that every being had within it.

Kagome did not understand it very well, but she could not help but feel that if this was the will of the kami, then she detested them and their will with her whole heart.

* * *

She stood watching from the bottom of the hill, eyes trained on the top of the slope. The cries of the several boys and girls gathered there echoed in her ears as they sung out to each other, advancing and retreating in linked lines. The wind brought the words of their song down to her, and she mouthed the words in time with them.

_Katte ureshii hana ichi monme_

_Makete kuyashii hana ichi monme_

_Ano ko ga hoshii_

_Ano ko ja wakaran_

_Sōdan shiyō_

_Sō shiyō_

The lines dissolved as the children converged into two groups in a bout of shouts and giggles. Kagome watched with wide eyes, wondering for a fleeting moment if this would be the time they would call her up. The time they would call her to join.

But the lines reformed and names were called. Her name was not.

One of the boys who had been called caught sight of her as he moved to the center of the group. He paused, staring down at her. His gaze drew that of the other children and soon all eyes were upon her. Kagome tensed, blinking up at them.

Abruptly she turned on her heel. She had lessons with Kaede. She really had no time to play, anyway. She needed to hurry.

Their murmurs seemed to trail after her. She bit her lip, her cheeks burning with a hot mix of anger and embarrassment.

Faintly she could hear some strange buzzing begin in her ears. She shook her head and continued walking.

* * *

She was trying to keep from leaning too heavily against Miroku's back, exhausted after a full day's ride. The faint buzzing in her head persisted even as her eyelids began to droop. She felt drained, too tired even to lift her head, and the rhythmic swaying of the horse beneath them lulled her even further.

It had been days since they had departed her village, and she had been largely successful in avoiding dwelling too much on what she had left behind. Times like these, though, it became difficult to find distractions, with her surroundings too dark to offer much of a view and her body too tired to summon the energy to do anything beyond thinking.

Inevitably her thoughts drifted back to her village. To her mother and brother and grandfather. To Kaede. She was all too well aware that it might be years before she could go back to see them. And yet, even knowing this, some small, guilty part of her was glad to get away. Some part of her had always wanted to go away, to simply find someplace else.

Strangely enough, though, another part of her had wanted them to tell her to stay. It did not make any sense. She knew that well enough and had chastised herself from time to time for the insensibility of it. Still, the feeling remained. In her heart, she had wanted them to ask her to simply stay with them.

But they had not. They had let her go.

She frowned to herself, eyelids drooping as she slipped slowly into unconsciousness. The persistent buzzing in the back of her head at last resolved itself into something intelligible.

"Kagome! Kagome!"

She thought perhaps Miroku might be calling her. She was too tired to care.

* * *

"Kagome! Can you hear me? Kagome!"

The voice calling her name had not ceased, but it was such a soft, distant sound that it was easy to disregard.

She stood over the prone body of the woman who had been her mentor, feeling strangely detached. Kaede would never talk or move or smile again. She was gone.

Inuyasha had left the hut in order to give her some space. She needed to prepare the body before she could commence with the ceremony of the final rites.

Now that she was alone, though, she could not seem to do anything besides stare blankly down into the face of the dead woman. She could not will herself to move.

Abruptly she felt anger begin to well up in her, warming her all through. She bit down on her lip, surprised at the feeling and unable to hold it back.

Kaede had lied to her. Time and time again she had lied to her. She had saddled her with a burden that she would likely have to carry for the rest of her life, all because she was too selfish to take responsibility for it. It was hard to believe that the woman had ever loved her at all. She had merely used her because she was convenient.

Looking down into the woman's face, Kagome felt certain for a moment that she hated her. The feeling rose like bile in her throat and she feared she might choke on it.

"Kagome!"

The voice seemed to be growing louder. She ignored it.

* * *

"How poorly you have been used, Kagome."

Kagome blinked slowly, realizing that her eyes were open. Her thoughts swirled sluggishly in her head, thick and slow like muddied waters, and it took her several moments to register that a pair of eyes were gazing up into her own.

The face was small and solemn, heavy-lidded violet eyes peering up into her own. It was a…baby, she realized slowly. It lay cradled in the crook of one of her arms.

"You must be angry, Kagome. You have worked so hard and they have all betrayed you. Are you not angry, Kagome?"

Betrayed. Angry. The words echoed strangely in her head, and heat prickled along the back of her neck. Her face warmed and she could feel herself tensing.

"It is alright, Kagome. Let the anger come. Do not fight it. No one could condemn you for it, not after how they have all treated you. It is only natural. Embrace it."

She could feel her face heating further, and there was something almost comforting about the burning sensation she could feel growing in her chest. They had wronged her. All of them had wronged her, and she was tired of struggling and feeling frightened all the time. At least this warmth, this burning feeling, felt certain.

"Kagome!"

She blinked slowly. It was that voice again. The one that had been calling her before. It seemed to be getting louder again.

"Kagome," the baby spoke, recalling her attention. "They deserve your anger-your hatred. You cared so much for them, and look how quickly they have forgotten you."

She could still see the baby's face, its eyes peering up into her own, but suddenly there was something else, as well. She could see the camp. Miroku and Sango and Shippou. Haru and Kohaku. Tomiko and Noriko and the rest of the Tachibana guard.

They carried on as they always had. Chatting, eating, laughing on occasion. Even Miroku and Sango seemed to have set aside their issues for the moment, sitting next to each other around the fire with Shippou between them. No one even seemed to be aware…

"That you are not there?" the baby finished, and the vision dissolved abruptly. "After all that you have done for them, they do not even realize that you are not with them. Or perhaps they do. Perhaps they are relieved to be rid of you, relieved that they can finally be done with this mission and return to the capital. Relieved as your village was relieved to see you go. Relieved as Inuyasha was to see you gone from the court, that he might finally marry without having to concern himself over the burden of your feelings."

_Inuyasha…_

"Kagome! Kagome!"

The voice would not stop calling her. The heat growing inside her suddenly turned to flames, searing her insides. She groaned softly, and the voice calling out to her grew louder. Between the flames and the voice and the baby in her arms calling out to her, she could scarcely think clearly enough to draw breath.

"What is happening? I thought you had her under control."

"There is something else inside her head. It is interfering with my work."

"Naraku-sama is impatient to have her brought to him-"

"You think I do not know that, you mindless puppet? But she will only be a danger to everything Naraku-sama is doing if we bring her all that way before the Shikon has turned. Now if you will be silent long enough for me to-"

"Inuyasha…"

It took several moments for Kagome to realize that the word had come from her lips, but suddenly several things seemed to click into place all at once. The fog in her head lessened and the heat scorching her insides cooled. She realized that she had no idea where she was. That the child cradled in the crook of her arm was a youkai. That her free hand still clutched the mala bead with all the strength she had in her.

That the voice that had been calling to her all this time was his.

"Kagome!"

This time is was the baby calling out to her, and a sweeping wave of fog seemed to roll back in over her mind.

"You are confused, Kagome," the baby crooned, and her vision narrowed until its eyes were the only thing she could see clearly. "I know it is difficult. Difficult to accept how cruel they all have been. But deluding yourself will solve nothing. He is at this very moment in the court, content with his new bride. Only look and see."

As before when she had seen the camp of her companions, the baby was still clearly visible, but another sight was superimposed over it like an image over crystal clear waters. A vision formed.

It was Inuyasha. He was asleep, his expression peaceful and unguarded in a way she had seldom seen before. Contentment, true and deep, was the word that came most strongly to mind as she looked at him.

Beneath a layer blankets, his torso appeared to be bare. He lay on his side, his body curled protectively around…

Kagome's heart froze inside her chest.

It was Kikyou. His body curled closely around Kikyou, the top of her head tucked neatly beneath his chin. Beneath the blankets her skin appeared to be as bare as his, a faint smile edging her lips even in her sleep. One pale hand was pressed closely to his chest.

Kagome could feel the heat growing up once more in the pit of her stomach, prickling along her neck and arms. It overtook the wrenching ache that the sight caused her and she welcomed it.

"You see now? It is as I have said. He was glad to be rid of you. He is happy now, while you suffer still under the burden of your misguided, shameful love for a man that you cannot have. A love that weakens you. A love that has twisted you with jealousy and spite. Love wasted on an uncaring half-breed-"

"No."

The sound was scarcely more than a breath of air escaping her. It was all that she could manage with the force of the anger that was roiling inside her. But the baby's words had sparked something in her.

_"It is never wrong to love somebody, my child. At times it might make you feel ugly and strange to yourself. At times it will be frightening in its power. And at times, like now, it will hurt you more deeply than anything else will ever have the power to. But I promise you, my child, that love, if you have the strength to embrace it fully, is the only gift that will ever make this life worth living."_

The words, buried beneath the years in her memory, came back to her now. Kaede had spoken them to her, taking her aside after her father's final rites. At the time the words had fallen on deaf ears, her anger and sadness too great to allow her to heed anything else. She remembered now, though.

"It is never wrong to love somebody," she murmured, the words coming more easily.

It was not wrong. It was not shameful. It was not weakness. Whatever the possible consequences of it might be, she loved Inuyasha. He deserved to be loved and she loved him. And it would never be wrong to love someone.

She had been running ever since she was child. It was finally time to stop.

"Kagome! Answer me, Kagome!"

He had never stopped calling for her.

"Inuyasha…" she called weakly in return, her body feeling as heavy as if it had been ages since she had last moved it. "Inuyasha!"

"Stop that, Kagome!" the baby snapped, a note of ire entering its voice for the first time. "You are confused! He is with her in the court! He has forsaken you, they all have forsaken-"

A giant tremor shook the room, cutting the child off. Kagome gasped, her head jerking upward. For the first time she could see beyond the face of the child cradled against her.

They appeared to be in some sort of cave. It was difficult to make out in the gloom that surrounded them, but the musty smell of earth and moss told the story clearly enough. The air around them felt stagnant, and she wondered how deep down they were.

She had little time to think beyond this, though, as another great tremor rocked the chamber. With each jolt Kagome felt her mind clear a little further, feeling returning to her limbs and a thousand questions flooding her mind all in an instant. The voice that had been calling to her persisted, however, more loudly, more desperately, so that it drowned almost everything else in her head out.

"Kagome! I’m coming! Wait for me, Kagome!"

"Inuyasha!" she called, uncertain if he could hear her as she heard him. "Inuyasha! I’m here, Inuyasha!"

"Silence, you fool!" the baby cried as another tremor, more powerful than those before it, shook them and brought a light rain of debris down. "Boy, what is happening?!"

"Someone is attempting to pierce Naraku-sama's barrier," a voice answered colorlessly. "There is no need for concern. Naraku-sama created the barrier with the jyaki of thousands of youkai. Please continue in your mission, Akago-sama-"

"No need for concern?" snapped the baby, Akago, cutting the speaker short. "Mindless tool of a boy! Someone has managed to find her after all that effort was put in to take her in secret! I need more time! She is putting up more resistance than I had anticipated-"

Another thin layer of earth fell down about them as a blow rocked the room, cutting Akago short. The small child scowled, the expression incongruent with his tiny features. He waved a small hand, presumably in the direction of the other person in the room that Kagome could not make out through the darkness.

"What are you waiting for?" he said. "Go see to the problem now, or else I will lay all the blame on you when Naraku-sama's planning all comes to nothing!"

"There is no need for concern," the voice repeated with equal monotony. "If it is a youkai, the barrier will soon consume its youki to fortify itself. It will be dead shortly. Please focus on your task, Akago-sama. Naraku-sama is already impatient-"

"Silence, impudent boy," Akago snarled, violet eyes narrowed. "That I must rely on such a pathetic dog to guard me-"

This time it was not a tremor that cut his words short, but Kagome herself. She shifted, jostling the child where he was cradled in the crook of her arm. The words of the figure that she could not see had sparked something inside her mind, and she knew suddenly that she had to move.

"Kagome, what are you doing?" Akago said, its tone sliding smoothly down into something low and soothing. "Come, calm down. You need not move. If there is anything that you wish to see, I will show it to. I will show you the truth, as no one has before-"

"No," Kagome gasped, feeling her muscles begin to relax once more as if of their own will. "No more. No more."

She understood now that, strange as it seemed, the child was somehow manipulating her. It had shown her her own memories and some visions of the world, all of them distorted and dark. It was trying to get at something inside of her…

She had never encountered a youkai with abilities like it before, but she did not have time to consider it at the moment. The voice that called to her was growing more frantic, but also weaker. She had to move now.

It took some effort, but she managed to force her limbs to set the child aside. Though she knew it meant her ill, she could not bring herself to do it any harm as long as it wore such an innocent form. Nor did it seem capable of much beyond whatever it had been attempting to do to her mind, as it could do no more than cry out to her as she set it aside.

The effort it took to force herself to her feet was even greater, all her limbs crying out in simultaneous protest. They were as weak and knotted as if it had been weeks since last she had moved them, and she stumbled several times before she could steady herself.

Kagome had only managed a few blind, tottering steps before something emerged out of the darkness to block her path.

It was Kohaku.

She choked on a cry, stumbling back a step and nearly falling. The memory of him standing stone-faced behind her, the cool metal of his chain wrapped about her throat, returned to her with the force of a blow.

"K-Kohaku-kun," she breathed.

"Please return to Akago-sama," he spoke. "He is not yet finished speaking with you."

There was not the vaguest hint of a threat in his voice, but her eyes darted instinctively to the kusari-gama in his hands. Chills crawled across her skin.

"Kagome! Answer me, Kagome!"

Kagome blinked, uncertain this time if the voice had been only in her head.

"Inuyasha!" she screamed, as loudly as she could manage. "Inuyasha!"

The mountain rocked so hard that Kagome was afraid it might collapse around them. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Kohaku stumble, dodging out of the path of a large fragment of earth and falling rock.

Kagome was off in a flash, the darkness of the cave and the stiffness of her muscles be damned.

"…the barrier will consume its youki. It will soon be dead."

The words pounded in time with her own pulse in her ears as she ran, nearly blind and groping her way through the darkness. They were enough to chill even the surge of joy that had momentarily filled her at her other realization.

Inuyasha was there. Inuyasha had come for her.

If she did not get to him soon, though, it would all be for nothing.

She had no idea how to find her way out. For all she knew she was merely winding her way more deeply into the mountain. The sounds of the strange baby crying out behind her and the echo of footsteps following her down the tunnel kept her from summoning enough energy to form a light.

She gasped, biting her tongue to keep from crying out as she smacked hard into something solid. A wall of earth, and a bit of blind groping told her that it was the point where the cave forked in two different directions.

Kagome hesitated, her mind racing. She could hear Kohaku's footsteps growing louder every moment. If he caught her he would bring her back to that youkai that wore a child's face, and she was not at all certain that she had the strength to resist it a second time. And Inuyasha, the fate that would befall him…

Her hands clenched more tightly at her sides. She blinked, surprised at the feel of something solid against the flesh of her left palm. She had been clutching it the entire time without realizing it. Her hand felt stiff from having been curled around it for so long.

The bead, she realized suddenly. She had managed to keep hold of it all this time.

Closing her eyes, she forced herself to calm down and focus for a moment. She could feel him through their link. He truly was nearby, and she could feel their bond stretching between them like a length of red thread. If she followed its tug, she knew she could find him.

There was no way she could outrun Kohaku, however. The footsteps were almost on her, and even this small amount of exertion had left her in a cold sweat. She clutched the bead more tightly.

He had found his way to her when so much separated them. Surely she could do the same now that they were so close.

Summoning her energy up so quickly that it made her light-headed, Kagome formed a sphere of light in her free hand. She quickly sent it flying down the left-hand tunnel before dashing down the right-hand one. The ball of energy would likely dissipate shortly, but she was willing to take any time that she could buy for herself.

Sure enough she could hear the footsteps grow fainter as Kohaku turned to follow the ball of light. Kagome quickened her pace, the tug of the bond steadying her steps even in the darkness.

Periodically the cave would shake beneath the force of a blow and she could hear Inuyasha call out to her. She did not dare to answer for fear of alerting Kohaku, but she focused all of her energy into the bead in the hopes that he would realize she could hear him.

What troubled her, though, was that she could indeed sense his youki growing weaker as Kohaku had predicted it would. Whatever sort of barrier had been set up to protect the mountain, she was not certain if Inuyasha was capable of breaking it. She needed to get to him quickly.

She reached a point where the tunnel began to narrow rapidly, the walls and ceiling seeming to close in around her all at once. She had to crouch down, moving almost on her hands and knees. It got so narrow at one point that she was not sure if she could physically continue moving forward.

With some twisting and wriggling she managed to force herself through, pushing determinedly forward. The press of walls all around her was beginning to wear on her, though, and the panicked thought occurred to her more than once that she might reach a point that was too tight for her to get out of again.

Still, she had to reach him.

A few more twists ands turns in the course of the tunnel brought a change. The air grew lighter, the musty smell of earth less cloying. Kagome's heart leapt in her chest.

It was fresh air. She had to be close.

Redoubling her efforts, she found the opening in just a few moments. The daylight that flooded into the cave through it was almost too bright to bear, but after a few moments her eyes adjusted enough to see that the opening led out onto a ledge. It appeared that she was some ways up the mountain. Now all she had to do was find Inuyasha. She called out to him.

Halfway the sound turned into a scream, a hand clamping down around her ankle. She was tugged back from the ledge and the light, pinned down with a strength greater than her own. Wide-eyed she looked up into the vacant face of Kohaku.

"You need to go back to Akago-sama," he said. "Akago-sama only wishes to help you."

"We both know that's not true," Kagome replied through lips gone numb. "I won't go back there."

He said nothing, but one of the hands holding her down shifted and she found the cool metal of the kusari-gama pressed against her throat. Her flesh turned to ice.

"No," she breathed, shaking her head. "No, Kohaku-kun. Kohaku-kun. You don't want to do this. I-I know you don't. Think of your father. Think of Sango. If she saw this…if she saw you doing this, it would crush her. She loves you, Kohaku-kun. So, please, just stop now. Just stop this now and we can both go back to her, alright?"

Kohaku blinked. Kagome felt the press of the chain against her throat lessen for a moment. Something, the briefest flash of something, moved across his face.

"Ane-ue…" he murmured, as if he could not quite recall what the word meant.

"Yes," Kagome pressed, nodding encouragingly. "Yes, Sango. Your sister. Surely you haven't forgotten her, forgotten how much she cares for you. And your father, too. We all care about you, Kohaku-kun. All of us. So let's just go, alright? We'll get away from here and never come back."

Tentatively, afraid that any sudden movement might break the spell, Kagome reached a hand up. She pressed her fingertips lightly against his cheek, allowing her eyes to slide shut.

She could feel it. The same thing she had sensed in that little boy in court. The spider was inside Kohaku, as well, but larger. It did not feed off of the weak light that was his spiritual energy, but held it fast within the cage of its eight legs. Her instinct had been right. Kohaku was being controlled.

And if he was being controlled, then she could save him.

She stretched out her spiritual senses, reaching for the spider. Likely she would overextend herself again if she tried to force it out, but she could not simply leave Kohaku like this. She had to bring him back to Sango and the rest of his family.

Just as the blue glow of her own energy was about to reach the spider, it jerked away. Kagome's eyes snapped open.

It was not only the spider that had recoiled from her. Kohaku himself had leapt up and away from her. The eyes that looked out at her now were blank once more.

"Kohaku-kun!" she called out, scrambling to her feet.

He backed away from her down the tunnel, kusari-gama raised as if to ward her off. Kagome moved to follow him.

"Kagome!"

The call startled her and she whirled around. It had come from outside the tunnel and suddenly she recalled what she had been doing only moments before. Kagome hesitated, torn between chasing after Kohaku and running to Inuyasha's side.

"Kagome!"

The cry settled the matter for her in an instant. A glance back revealed that Kohaku had already disappeared back into the depths of the mountain, and with a twinge Kagome darted forward out into the light.

"Inuyasha! Inuyasha!"

She could not see the hanyou, but even just being able to call his name aloud was something of a relief. She clutched the bead, hoping that the tug of their bond would lead her to him.

It drew her eyes downward, and for a moment everything stopped.

He was there at the foot of the mountain. Tessaiga was transformed at his side, the tip buried in the ground beside him as he used it to support his weight. Even from a distance he looked exhausted and disheveled, but the joy surging through Kagome at the sight of him was so great she feared her heart might burst with it.

He raised his head. Their eyes met. What followed happened so rapidly that Kagome scarcely understood it afterwards.

Her body was slipping and scrabbling down the mountain slope before she had even thought to move. Inuyasha was pulling his sword from the earth, rushing headlong back towards the barrier that was rife with jyaki that she could feel pulsing sickeningly all about the mountain. By the time she had reached the foot of the slope, he was there, too, with his blade poised.

As if with one mind they moved, her hand reaching up to press against the barrier of youki at the same moment that his sword swung down in a mighty arc against it. And then the world had exploded.

Her spiritual energy, his youki, and the jyaki of the barrier collided in a flash of light and a thunder of sound. And despite the fact that every blow before had failed to move it, despite the fact that they were both hovering close to exhaustion already, the barrier gave way like so much dust between them.

In a moment his arms were around her and hers around him. The force of their bond pulsed between them like a shared heartbeat, and Kagome's ears were filled with the sound of his voice repeating her name over and over and over again. She could not gather enough of her wits to form words to reply.

She knew with a certainty that went beyond thought that she would never leave him behind again.

She felt him tense against her.

"What-?"

"Them," he snarled.

Kagome turned, spotting Kohaku emerging out onto a ledge high up on the mountain. It was difficult to tell, but he seemed to be carrying the baby in his arms. Inuyasha jerked forward as if to go after them, but Kagome held him fast.

"No!" she said. "One of them is Sango’s brother. Just let me try to talk to him-"

But even as she spoke a massive swarm of saimyōshō appeared seemingly out of nowhere, descending upon the pair. They were lifted up and ascended rapidly into the air, the swarm fading out of sight almost as quickly as it had appeared. Kagome broke away from the hanyou’s embrace, reaching out a hand as she stumbled a few steps back towards the mountain.

"Kohaku-kun! Wait! Kohaku-"

She had taken no more than three steps before she collapsed, all of her muscles going limp simultaneously. Her vision swam and her head felt light. It had not felt like much in the rush of the moment, but she had expended a massive amount of energy in breaking the barrier.

She was not afraid, though. She could feel his arms go around her as she fell, and she knew that whatever might come she was safe. Through the embrace she could feel him trembling slightly, a mixture of his own exhaustion and something else entirely, and she reached up with what strength she had left to twine her arms about him in return.

Her vision was blurring as her eyes found his face at last, but she would have known those eyes anywhere.

"Inuyasha," she said, the sound escaping her as little more than a rasp. "Inuyasha…Inuyasha, Inuyasha, Inuyasha…"

She could not seem to manage anything beyond that. If she never said another word in her life save his name, she thought she might be the happiest woman in the world. He scoffed, the sound lacking any edge, and pushed back the hair that had fallen across her face.

"Hey, Kagome," he said lowly, a tremor hiding just beneath the words.

She smiled.

* * *

It was dark and she couldn't move. Panic seized her, aching muscles jerking as she struggled to move.

The baby still held her fast in the darkness of the cave. Kohaku lurked nearby, eyes empty and kusari-gama in hand. Hot tears streamed down her cheeks as she realized that Inuyasha had been nothing more than a dream. Just another torturous dream in a never-ending stream of them. Surely she would go mad soon. She wanted to scream, but even her throat refused to obey her.

"Open your eyes."

It was that monstrous child again-that thing wearing a child's face. Kagome kept her eyes shut tight, refusing to obey its commands. It was trying to drive her mad. As awful as she felt in that moment, she feared it might soon succeed.

"Kagome, open your eyes," it ordered again.

She jerked harder, struggling desperately, but it held her fast. She would never get away.

"Oi, Kagome!"

She froze. A hand moved across her face, swiping at her cheeks. Hardly daring to breathe, she opened her eyes.

Inuyasha was there.

"You were having a bad dream," he said quietly, moving his hand away slowly.

"...Everything feels like a bad dream," she murmured. "And I'm terrified that I'm still asleep."

He simply looked at her for a long moment, his eyes following the contours of her face.

"…yeah."

She wanted to reach for him and realized that she truly could not move her limbs.

"Inuyasha, I can't move."

"Oh."

It was difficult to tell-it was only slightly lighter out with her eyes open than it had been with them closed-but his face was close enough that she could almost make out a faint flush coloring it. He shifted, tugging at something until her arms came free.

She flushed herself as she realized her position. He had situated her firmly between his legs, her back resting partly against his chest as she craned to look at him. The white of his kosode was visible and she realized that it was his karaginu, tucked far too tightly about her, that had been restricting her movements.

His eyes met hers through the darkness as he finished loosening the garment around her shoulders.

"You passed out," he said after a moment.

Something in his look, in the care with which he seemed to choose the words, told her that there was much more that he wanted to say. But he said nothing.

For that she was grateful. She did not want to think about any of it at the moment. Part of her was still afraid that this was just another dream. That she would wake up back in that mountain again. Or perhaps that she would never wake up again at all.

She suppressed a shudder, turning to lean fully back against Inuyasha. As if he could sense the tide of her thoughts, his arms came up around her like a barrier.

"You did not light a fire," Kagome said, needing to distract herself. A part of her just wanted to hear his voice.

"Yeah," he said. "I didn't want to draw attention. They might be…There might be youkai out in the woods."

They might still be out there, Kagome supplied where he had trailed off. Silently she was grateful for this caution on his part. He was obviously no more eager than she was to encounter them again. They were both still weak after all that had happened and this time they might not-

"Aren't you cold?" she asked, unwilling to entertain that line of thought.

"Keh," he scoffed, and the familiar sound sent a thrill of warmth coursing through her. "Hanyou don't get cold. Worry about yourself."

As if to emphasize the point, he reached down to tuck the karaginu up closer to her chin. It smelled of him, and Kagome breathed deeply. A little bit of the chill seemed to go out of her limbs.

"Thank you," she said softly. Even as she spoke them, she knew the words went beyond the karaginu.

He seemed to know it, too. He shook his head.

"No," he said lowly. "Don't thank me for this, Kagome. You were almost-"

"I'm in love with you."

The words slipped from her with an ease she would never have thought possible. It was strange. She had not meant to say them. She had not even been vaguely entertaining the notion of saying them.

But they were out now, and she found a strange sense of peace settling over her. The last of the bone-deep chill in her limbs was gone. For the first time in a long time, she felt certain. Certain that she needed to say these words and certain that he needed to hear them. Dark and awful as it had been, Kagome finally understood.

It is never wrong to love somebody.

She felt him go rigid behind her.

"Please don't misunderstand. I don't expect anything from you. I just wanted to say it, to make it clear," she continued. "I love you, and I am done running away from that. It's not a bad thing. It's not something I should be ashamed of or try to hide."

"I realize that now, and I will never try to deny it again. I love you, and I'll likely continue feeling this way until the day I die. And that's fine. More than fine, really. I do not need anything more. I just want to be able to be at your side and to support you for as long as I can. If I can just have that..."

She paused, shifting in his arms to look at him. He looked frozen, so deeply stunned that he did not even blink. His eyes were huge as he met her gaze. She found herself smiling.

"I love you, Inuyasha," she said, the weight in her chest lightening a bit more with each repetition of the words. "And I want to be at your side for the rest of my life, come what may. I hope that's alright with you."

For long moments he simply stared at her, and she could feel tremors that had nothing to do with exhaustion moving through the frame that felt so solid against her back. And then something seemed to snap, his entire body clenching as his eyes slid shut.

"Kagome."

The word sounded as if it had been torn from him, small and hoarse.

All at once his arms went tight around her, pressing her close to his chest. She could feel the warmth of his face against her hair, and his hands shook where they clasped her to him.

"Kagome…Kagome…"

He chanted her name as harshly as if he wanted to force it out of himself forever. As lowly as if it were the most precious word he had ever learned. Warm wetness seeped through her hair where his face was pressed.

Kagome brought her arms up slowly, wrapping them about him. She sighed at the warmth that flowed through her, her eyes sliding closed. She felt certain that this moment could have made up for several lifetimes of suffering.

Perhaps this love would cause her more pain in the time to come, but she knew that she would never regret it again. She would never deny it again.

She loved Inuyasha. Whatever came next, she was no longer afraid.


	26. Of the Inevitable and the Intimate

Dawn brought with it an abrupt awakening.

The light of day seemed harsh as it pressed upon Kagome's closed lids. As she reluctantly allowed her eyes to open, raising a hand to guard against the bright light, she realized suddenly, certainly, that she was no longer in the cave.

She could not say what made her feel so certain, only that she was. Perhaps it was merely that the remnants of that fog were finally clearing from her mind. Perhaps the surprise and horror of the whole happening had been assuaged somewhat by a good night's rest. Whatever it was, she knew that she had escaped.

Or, more accurately, had been saved. Kagome shifted, turning just enough to see his face. His eyes were closed and his head hung forward slightly. He appeared to be dozing, though his arms were still wrapped loosely about her.

A rush that was a confusing mix of embarrassment and affection heated Kagome's face, both at the position and at the memories of the previous night that it invoked. She wanted to try and pull free of the embrace, but her reluctance to wake him won out after a few moments of consideration. She remained where she was.

Despite her embarrassment, she found that she did not regret what she had told him last night in the least. She would never regret it. She had needed to say it, and every word of it had been the truth. If it was the surreal haze that surrounded the previous night that had made it easier to say, then she was grateful for it.

They would have to be more careful in the future, however, to avoid situations like the one that she found herself in at the moment. It was one thing to come to an understanding about everything, but it was quite another to put themselves in such compromising positions. In the future they would have to take into consideration the possible scandal that such a scene might cause in the court and especially the feelings of…

Well, she was not quite ready to think about that yet. Besides, there were far more daunting and immediate realities to consider.

Kohaku had kidnapped her. He had taken her to….well, she was not certain what exactly he had taken her to. Nor what the thing had been trying to accomplish in stirring up such memories and visions in her.

All that she did know was that it was something to do with the spider. She had seen it inside of Kohaku and had felt in the baby a youki a very similar to it. Somehow it was involved, and that might be the only comfort she could offer to Sango.

It was Sango, despite all else, that concerned her most. That the little brother she loved so much had done something like this, even under the control of another, would crush her. That Kagome had failed to save him when she had had the chance and that they now had little to no way of finding where he had gone would devastate her. Kagome could scarcely imagine telling her all of it. Guilt writhed in the pit of her stomach.

"Oi."

Kagome nearly jumped out of her skin, far more startled than she should have been by the quiet word.

She turned to find Inuyasha, expression solemn and eyes on her face. She blinked, wondering how long he had been awake.

"…G-Good morning," she said, unable to think of anything else to say.

He said nothing, merely looking at her for long moments. One of his hands came up slightly as if to touch her face, but after a moment of hesitation it fell back. Slowly both of his arms fell away from her.

"We need to get going," he said, gaze slipping to the trees beyond her. "That thing might decide to come back for you as long as we're out here. We need to get back to court."

"Wait," Kagome said, placing a hand on his arm as he shifted to stand. "I can't go back yet."

He shot her a sharp look.

"Kagome-"

"Please," she cut him off. "Sango-chan and Miroku-sama have no idea where I am. Shippou-chan is with them, as well. And my mission is almost finished. If you just return me to them, I can still-"

"Like hell you will!" the hanyou snarled, fangs flashing in the early morning light. "Kami, Kagome! They could've killed you! Or worse! Fuck, if I hadn't found you, they-"

"They could have done anything to me," Kagome finished softly, a chill running through her as she spoke the words. "But you did find me. You did, Inuyasha, and I don't want to think about anything else. I can't. Because if I start thinking about it now, then I'll be stuck back in that darkness forever. I'll never get out. You came for me, Inuyasha. You saved me. Nothing else matters."

His mouth twisted, and his eyes slid away from hers. He raised his hand, pulling something from beneath the collar of his robes.

It was the nenju.

"I heard you screaming," he murmured. "Screaming and screaming and screaming. I'd heard you before, but never like that. And I had no idea what was happening. If you were dying or…I just kept following the screaming, for days and days. And if I live a thousand more years, that sound is still gonna be echoing around in my skull."

He raised his eyes to her. She froze.

"For once just listen to me, Kagome. Just lemme take you back to the court, alright?" he said quietly, the words strained. "If you wanna whine and sulk once we're there, fine. Do it as much as you want. I'll listen to every damn word of it. But for once just listen to me."

Kagome bit her lip. She was helpless to do anything save nod.

"Just…" she said softly, reluctant to push the matter any further. "Just…if we can just let Miroku-sama and Sango-chan know what has happened, that I am returning to the court with you, then I will ask nothing more. Please, Inuyasha. They have done a great deal for me, and they might be in danger, as well. I cannot simply leave them out here."

Inuyasha looked at her for a long moment, frowning deeply. Abruptly he huffed out a sigh that was half-growl, tossing his head. The ghost of a smile flitted across Kagome's lips.

"Thank you," she said, understanding well enough what the sound meant.

"Feh," Inuyasha scoffed, shaking his head. "Let's just get going already. The sooner we find them, the sooner we-"

Kagome's hand on his arm brought him up short as he moved to stand once more. He found her eyes fixed on his face, as impossibly grey and piercing as he had remembered.

"Not just for this," she said solemnly. "For everything. For coming for me. You were the first person I thought to call for when…well, you were the first person I thought to call for."

Inuyasha could only look at her, at those eyes he was sure that he knew better than any others in the world, uncomfortably conscious yet again of how close he had come to never seeing them again. His hands clenched at his sides, resisting the impulse to reach for her. To assure himself once more that she was there and warm and alive and that the screaming really had stopped.

He had already allowed himself too much.

"Don't thank me," he said, hating the roughness that choked his voice. "Just…stay alive, okay?"

The eyes blinked uncertainly and he was free. He rose abruptly and strode past her, needing to move. To get further away, as far away as he could get, from this place and this feeling.

"C'mon. Let's get going already."

* * *

They debated briefly on the best way to go about finding Kagome's companions, deciding ultimately that it would be best to return to Jinenji's village and track their movements from there in the hopes that they had not gone too far. Kagome was uncertain exactly how long it had been since the day that she had left the village with Kohaku, and Inuyasha could only tell her that he had heard her crying out for days on end but had himself lost track of time as he searched for her.

It took little time for Inuyasha to get them there, and the people of Jinenji's village greeted their appearance with astonished joy. A week before Sango had gone tearing through the village, no stone left unturned in her frantic search for her brother and Kagome. The villagers had been shocked to learn of their disappearance, and Sango had been on the verge of threatening them if they continued to conceal their whereabouts.

Eventually Miroku had been able to calm her enough to convince her that the villagers had obviously had no part in their disappearance. Several days ago, after combing every last bit of the village and the area surrounding it without finding the smallest clue, Miroku and Sango had decided to set out to the south in the hopes of finding them. They had departed, but the villagers had continued the search for them for days afterwards in the hopes of finding something. No trace had been found, though, and every day they had grown more distressed at the thought that after all that she had done for them they had been unable to do anything in return for her.

Her unexpected reappearance, whole and apparently unharmed, caused such an uproar that the whole village was out to greet them in mere moments. Jinenji wept loudly and openly, wrapping her in an embrace fit almost to break bones as even his mother had to work to force back tears. The village, despite their still meager food supply, proposed a feast of celebration.

While Kagome would have liked to have remained at least long enough to explain things to them-she had no intention of putting further strain on their supplies by indulging in such a frivolous feast, however kindly meant-time was not a luxury she had. They needed to catch up with her companions and return to the court as quickly as possible.

Thus she was forced to bid a hasty farewell to the villagers, promising to visit when she could, before setting out with Inuyasha at full speed again. As they began to move southward from the village Inuyasha was able to catch enough of a scent to begin to track her companions. At the rate they travelled, Kagome's companions were able to cover quite a bit of ground in the matter of only a few days. Thankfully, though, Inuyasha was more than equal to their speed. It took them a day's worth of solid travel without rest, but at last they were able to catch up.

Night had long since descended by the time they found their camp. Two guards were on watch as per usual. They were the first to spot Inuyasha and Kagome as they approached, though in the darkness they were unable to identify them immediately.

Their astonishment was doubly great when they realized who it was that had just materialized out of the darkness before them. Not only Kagome, who they had all but given up for lost, but the Tennō, as well. For several long moments the pair could do no more than gape.

Tomiko, one of the two on duty, was the first to move, nearly tackling Kagome with the force of her embrace even as she made several confused bows in Inuyasha's direction. She was babbling something so quickly that Kagome could scarcely make out a word of it, let alone give a response. Over the woman's shoulder she saw the second guard bow low to Inuyasha before darting back into the camp.

Even with Tomiko still chattering rapidly in her ear Kagome could hear the noise that went up in the camp. Moments later there was the pounding of feet on the earth and the whole of the group emerged from beyond the line of the trees.

Sango was at the head of the group, the strained hope that pulled her features taut almost more than Kagome could bear to see. Their eyes met over Tomiko’s shoulder and Kagome tensed.

This was the moment she had been dreading. The moment Sango's eyes lit up at the sight of her, only to dim slightly as she realized that Kohaku was nowhere to be found. Kagome's heart constricted in her chest.

Still Sango rushed toward her, a strangled sound escaping her as she nearly yanked her away from Tomiko and into her own embrace. Kagome's own arms came up around her tightly and she pressed her face to her friend's shoulder, a faint trembling beginning to spread through her limbs.

A moment later she felt two more pairs of arms surround her. She knew without having to glance up that it was Miroku and Shippou. Not a one of them said a word, though she could hear Shippou sniffling where he clung to her leg. She could feel herself crying, too, and did not bother to try and stop.

At length she was able to lift her eyes to meet Sango's. The older woman, her dearest friend, offered her a watery smile as she pushed back the hair that had fallen into Kagome's face. Kagome wished that the earth would open and swallow her.

"I'm so sorry, Sango," she said, her voice cracking around the words.

Sango frowned, shaking her head immediately.

"No, Kagome," she said. "No. You're here. You're alive. Nothing else-"

"I couldn't save Kohaku," Kagome interrupted her, needing to get the words out. "I tried, but…they still have him. They took him away with them. They…they've done something to him…to his mind. I think they're controlling him."

She had long since decided that she would never breathe a word of the role Kohaku had had in abducting her. He could hardly be held accountable for his actions, but Sango would never be able to understand it. She would be crushed.

Kagome would much sooner shoulder the guilt of having been unable to save him than reveal the truth of the betrayal.

Sango stared at her, wide eyes searching her face as her features paled rapidly. She looked as if they wind had been knocked out of her, her mouth moving wordlessly around the confusion of her thoughts.

A hand reached over Kagome to rest firmly on Sango's shoulder. Sango's gaze fixed on it, and she blinked as if coming out of a trance.

"He was alive when they took him?" came the voice from over Kagome's shoulder.

It was Miroku, the stolid quality to his tone easing the erratic thumping of Kagome's heart somewhat.

"Yes," she said, though it was to Sango that she directed her reply.

"And have you any reason to believe that they will do him harm any time soon?" Miroku asked in that same infinitely practical and infinitely comforting tone.

Sango's eyes were fixed over her shoulder on his face.

"No," Kagome answered immediately, not allowing herself time to consider the question. "No, I don't think so."

In all honesty it was hard for her to know. The spider youkai obviously had its reasons for wanting to control Kohaku. If those reasons went beyond her abduction, then he would be kept alive. If they did not…

There were times when delusion was infinitely kinder than the truth.

Sango's eyes lingered on Miroku's face several moments longer, her expression steadying. Her eyes slid back to Kagome's face.

"I don't blame you," she said lowly, shaking her head. "How could I? I'm just so glad you're alright. I thought…but I never gave up. I knew you would fight. If anything had happened to you, though…I-I never could have forgiven myself. I-"

She was crying now, unabashedly. It struck Kagome that, despite all that they had been through together, she had seldom seen the woman cry. It hit her how much she must have suffered, both her friend and her brother taken in one fell swoop, and she felt her eyes well with tears once more.

"It's alright," she said. "I'm alright. Inuya-The Tennō-sama saved me. Nothing happened to me. And we'll find Kohaku. I know we will. We'll find him and bring him back."

"…T-Tennō-sama?" Sango said, blinking to clear her eyes somewhat.

For the first time her gaze moved beyond Kagome's general vicinity, as if she had only just realized that anything else existed.

Inuyasha stood some distance off from the group, obviously uncomfortable. If he could have he would gladly have waited a ways off from the camp for her to finish her business with them, but he was unwilling to let her out of his sight. As Sango's eyes locked on him, he looked as if he were regretting that decision.

The noblewoman disentangled herself from Kagome, moving toward Inuyasha swiftly. The hanyou's eyes darted between Kagome and the approaching woman in askance, and he looked as if he would have bolted if he could.

Kagome only had a split second to wonder what Sango was doing when the woman practically launched herself at Inuyasha, embracing him for all that she was worth. Kagome blinked. Inuyasha turned to stone.

They were too far for her to catch what was being said as Sango's lips moved rapidly, but Kagome could only imagine it was words of gratitude for her rescue. Inuyasha relaxed slightly as she spoke and even nodded once in acknowledgement, his expression softening somewhat.

Beside her Miroku moved toward the hanyou, watching the pair. Shippou scrambled hurriedly up into her now free arms, voice so choked as he spoke that it was difficult to call the sounds escaping him words. She held him tight, stroking his hair as she watched Miroku kneel down beside her. From the corner of her eye she could see the rest of her companions follow his lead, all of them going down onto their knees in the dirt almost in unison.

Miroku arranged his hands before him, bowing lowly to Inuyasha. They all did, their foreheads nearly touching the earth. Kagome watched them as she cradled Shippou, unable to shake the feeling that the gesture was more one of thanks than respect. At any other time the thought might have troubled her, but at the moment she felt her heart swell almost painfully in her chest. She hugged Shippou more tightly, blinking hard.

Sango released Inuyasha, taking a quick step back as she recalled herself. She dipped in a low bow before him, and Kagome could see the flush that lit her features even from several lengths away. The others rose up from their places and Inuyasha took a step towards the group, his eyes moving to Kagome.

"We cannot stay long," he said shortly, with his usual skill for ruining a mood. "I am returning Kagome to the court for her own safety."

Sango glanced from her to him and back, considering this for a moment before nodding.

"That is likely for the best," she said, slipping quickly back into her role as the leader of the mission. "She will be safer there than here. With all due respect, though, your Majesty, I cannot yet return to the court. The rest of the guard may return if your Majesty wishes it, but until I find my brother…"

Inuyasha nodded.

"Fine," he said. "You have my leave to do as is necessary to retrieve your brother. Half of the guard will go with you. The other half will finish out the original mission and then report back to me. Houshi, you will take up the lead position for the mission in Tachibana's place."

Sango shot Miroku a look. Miroku turned towards Inuyasha, bowing his head to him in deference.

"If I might make a request, your Majesty," he said. "I believe I would be of more use in the search for Tachibana Kohaku."

Inuyasha frowned faintly, glancing towards Kagome. She nodded to him, understanding immediately Miroku's intentions. He wanted to be there for Sango. It seemed the disappearance of herself and Kohaku had been enough to get them past the rift that had grown up since they had stumbled across the village where Miroku's father had been cursed.

After a moment of consideration Inuyasha nodded.

"Fine," he said. "If you think you will be more useful there, I will allow it. Tachibana, I will leave it to you to determine how the two groups will be split and to appoint a leader to the second group."

Sango nodded, bowing her head to him gratefully.

"Haru-san," Kagome spoke up, adjusting the kitsune in her arms. "You are free to return to the village now, if you would like. His Majesty is willing to assign a pair of guards to escort you back. I fear I have already asked too much of you in all this."

Haru stepped towards her from among the guard, shaking his head. He made a clumsy bow in Inuyasha's direction.

"I appreciate the Tennō-sama's kind offer," he said. "But when I offered my help to Kagome-sama, it was meant to be until the mission was done. I'd like to remain with the taiji-ya, to see this thing out until the end."

"Are you certain, Haru-san?" Kagome pressed. "You would be safer returning to the village."

"Your safety is the only one I'm worried about, Kagome-sama," Haru replied, offering her a small smile. "Please, go back to the court and keep safe. I will do my best to support you out here. If I don't keep my word to you this time, I'll never be able to live with myself."

He met her eyes and Kagome hesitated. She did not like the idea of him continuing on with a guard drastically reduced in size and the spider youkai still lurking around out there somewhere. Haru was not trained to defend himself should the need arise and the spider youkai had access to a good deal of knowledge about her guard through Kohaku. There was no way of knowing if it would choose to go after them.

Still, she remembered clearly all that he had confessed to her. His desire to atone. She had no right to take that decision from him, even out of concern for his safety.

"Alright," she said. "On the condition that you stay close to the taiji-ya at all times."

His smile widened. He nodded before bowing to them both once more.

"Thank you, Kagome-sama, Tennō-sama" he said before stepping back among the guard.

"Miroku-sama, Sango-sama, the Tennō-sama and I need a word in private with you before we go," Kagome said, turning to the two.

They glanced at one another before moving forward towards Kagome and Inuyasha. Asking to be allowed a moment, Kagome handed Shippou off to Sango before moving to stand among the rest of the guard.

She expressed her thanks for all the work they had done in protecting her and said her farewells, clasping hands and exchanging promises to visit once they returned to the court. She was certain Inuyasha would want to leave as soon as they were finished speaking with Miroku and Sango, and she did not want to go without having spoken to each of them first.

Once she was done she returned to the group of four and they moved off a ways so as not to be overheard. Though she trusted them all with her life, Kagome knew that this was not a matter that they should all be involved in.

"The spider youkai was behind the abduction," Kagome said without preamble as Shippou scrambled eagerly back into her arms.

Miroku and Sango both tensed.

"How do you know?" Miroku asked a bit sharply.

"I could sense it," Kagome replied. "It wasn't actually there, but I could sense its youki. I know it was involved."

Sango looked to Miroku. He was silent for several long moments, brow furrowing as he considered this. At length he raised dark eyes to meet Kagome's, jaw set in a solemn line.

"Then, when we find Kohaku-kun, we might find the youkai, as well?" he said.

Kagome nodded.

"Yes," she said softly. "There is a chance, though I cannot say anything with certainty. I just…I thought you should know. I didn't want you to be caught off guard in case…"

"Thank you, Kagome-chan," Miroku said, his expression softening somewhat. "I appreciate the gesture."

"Just don't do anything rash, alright?" Kagome said, meeting his eyes beseechingly. "Stay with the group. Stay safe."

This last bit she directed more to Sango than Miroku. The noblewoman nodded slightly to show she understood. She would keep an eye on Miroku. She would make certain he was safe.

Truthfully Kagome had entertained for a brief moment the idea of saying nothing to Miroku about the spider youkai. He was so fixated on avenging his father's death. There was little Kagome could imagine that he would not do to accomplish it, including sacrificing his own life.

She had dismissed the idea rather quickly, though. She could only imagine how she would feel if she were in the same situation and someone who was supposed to be her friend hid such knowledge from her. She did not doubt that he would never forgive her for it.

So she had decided that she would simply have to trust him. Trust him and trust Sango to watch over him.

"We will be as careful as we possibly can, Kagome-chan," Sango replied in Miroku's stead. "And we will return, all of us, to the court as soon as we can recover Kohaku. Until then, please just focus on keeping yourself safe."

Kagome nodded, offering her friend a small smile. At her side Inuyasha stepped forward.

"We need to get going," he said. "We only came to make sure that you were fully informed before we went back to the court."

Kagome shot him a glance, slightly annoyed at his cutting their reunion so short. Everything that was absolutely essential had been conveyed, but it still felt like there was so much she wanted to say. Inuyasha, catching her look, merely shrugged before distancing himself enough to allow her to say her last good-byes.

Sango stepped forward first, embracing her once more. Shippou let out a small squeak of protest as he was sandwiched between them.

"I'm serious," Sango murmured feelingly. "You just focus on keeping yourself safe. I can take care of everything else. The court is the safer choice, but we both know that even it is not the safest. Keep close to the Tennō-sama. It seems that if there is anyone in this world capable of protecting you, it is his Majesty."

"Stay close to Miroku-sama," Kagome said in reply. "The spider youkai…I am afraid of the lengths he is willing to go to destroy it. But if you're with him, I know he will be alright. I know you can keep him safe. And keep yourself safe, as well. When you find Kohaku-kun…just keep in mind that he is not himself. The spider has a firm grip on him. But if it's you, I think you can get through to him."

Sango nodded, squeezing her tightly once more before pulling back.

Miroku stepped forward, embracing her in turn. Faintly she heard Inuyasha grumble something behind them, but he did not interfere. Miroku leaned his head down slightly until it was level with her ear, speaking softly to keep from being overheard.

"As you well know, minions of the spider youkai or the youkai itself may still be in the court," he murmured. "I want your word, Kagome-chan, that you will not seek them out."

Kagome frowned, attempting to pull back far enough to get a look at him. He tightened his grip, holding her fast.

"I know you, Kagome," he continued lowly. "I know that you will want to try and help me, but I shared the story of my father with you only under duress. I do not want to you to involve yourself in the matter any further, do you understand me? I need your word that you will not pursue it."

Kagome hesitated for a long moment. Miroku was right. She did intend to at least look into the matter of the spider youkai when she returned to court, though it was not solely for his sake. The spider was connected to the death of Inuyasha's father in some way and obviously was after her for some reason or another. With all of that on the line she could scarcely promise not to do anything.

She was spared the argument that her answer undoubtedly would have caused. The length of their embrace had stretched Inuyasha's patience to its limits, and the hanyou stepped in to yank her forcibly from the houshi's arms. Miroku stumbled forward a step, blinking in surprise.

"We need to get going," Inuyasha snapped, scowling at the other man.

Kagome frowned at him, hardly pleased with the coarseness of his manner, but nodded nonetheless.

"I wish I could stay longer, but his Majesty is right," Kagome said apologetically to her friends. "His Majesty should not be absent from the court for any longer than is absolutely necessary."

"It is alright, Kagome-chan," Sango said, coming forward to stand beside the bemused houshi. "We understand. We will see you soon back in court."

Kagome nodded.

"Yes. I will see you all again soon."

She hesitated, her eyes lingering on her friends' faces for several long moments. She simply had to believe in them.

She forced herself to turn away.

"Wait."

The unexpected voice came from inside the cradle of her arms. Kagome blinked, looking down at the kitsune.

"Shippou?"

The boy looked up at her, big green eyes solemn.

"I…I want to stay with Sango and Miroku," he said timidly.

Kagome blinked. That was the last thing she had expected to hear. She had simply taken it for granted that Shippou would want to come with her. Besides which she was his guardian. It was her responsibility to make sure that he was safe, and while the court was not the safest place it would likely be safer than if he were to remain outside.

"Shippou-"

"Kohaku's my friend," the kitsune said hurriedly, sensing a denial. "He was always really nice to me. I wanna stay with you, but I wanna help him, too. That's what friends do for each other. That's…That's what you'd do if it was your friend, isn't it? So I wanna help him, even if it means we have to be apart for awhile."

He gazed up at her, eyes meeting hers steadfastly, and she saw in that small face the flash she had seen from time to time in him of something older than his years. Some sort of simple wisdom that understood the world in a way she never could.

With a flash she recognized the moment for what it was. Perhaps she had not given birth to the kitsune, had not raised him, but some parental instinct flared up in her. This was one of those important moments. One of those moments that would either be a step towards adulthood or stumbling block in the path of it.

He wanted to help his friend. To return kindness with kindness, even if it meant being apart from her. It was honorable, a sign of something good growing inside of him.

But it was dangerous. He would be with Miroku and Sango, but she could not be there personally to ensure his safety. She would never forgive herself if anything were to happen to him while they were apart.

There was no denying that he and Kohaku had grown close during the course of their travels. Or, at least, had appeared to have grown close. After what had happened, it was difficult to say how much of what she had observed had been Kohaku and how much of it had merely been the spider biding its time inside him until the moment was right. He had seemed partial to Shippou, though. She had observed something lighter in him when he was around the kitsune. Perhaps, then, Shippou might be helpful in breaking the boy free of the spider's hold.

But was any of that really enough to justify her allowing Shippou to do something so dangerous?

"Let him go."

Kagome blinked, raising her eyes to meet Inuyasha's. She half-expected to see impatience there, merely a desire to have the decision made already so that they might go.

Inuyasha's eyes, however, rested measuringly on the kitsune. There was something almost like the beginnings of respect in his gaze, and Kagome got the feeling that he understood Shippou much better in that moment than she did.

"He's gotta grow up sometime," Inuyasha said, glancing up at her.

Kagome frowned. Of course it was easy for him to say that. He was not in charge of the boy, after all. He was not responsible for his safety and care. He could afford to speak lightly.

But he was not. She knew Inuyasha was not the type to speak flippantly about things that were truly important.

Kagome sighed.

"Alright," she said, feeling the weight of the word as it left her. "But you have to promise me that you will not separate from Sango-chan and Miroku-sama. Not even for an instant. You have to stick with them no matter what, do you understand me?"

Shippou nodded readily.

"I understand. I promise."

"We will take care of him, Kagome-chan," Sango said, stepping forward and extending her arms to the kitsune. "I promise no harm will come to him."

She offered Shippou a smile, warmed by more than merely the affection she felt for him. There was gratitude there, too, for the sake of her brother. Kagome knew that whatever the circumstances she would do her utmost to protect the kitsune.

Reluctantly she raised the kitsune up, squeezing him tightly for several long moments before handing him over to Sango. He offered her a small smile from the other woman's arms.

"Don't worry," he said. "We'll be back soon, remember?"

Kagome blinked, swallowing back the tightness she could feel growing in her throat. She nodded once and, taking one last long look at the three, turned to move away. In moments she was on Inuyasha's back and they were flying through the dark forest. She refused to look back.

She had faith in them. They would see each other again soon.

* * *

Inuyasha did not slacken his pace in the slightest on their return journey to the court. A part of her was glad for it. She was well aware of the danger of him being absent from the court, and the sooner they could get him back the better.

Another part of her was worried. Surely even a hanyou would be worn down by this grueling pace. Any time she expressed concern, however, he shrugged it off succinctly. If he felt tired he refused to show any sign of it. He was bent on getting them back to the court as quickly as his body would allow.

On the nights when she did manage to force him to take a rest -invariably by complaining of her own exhaustion)- Inuyasha always stuck close to her. Often too close. Each night when they settled in to sleep he would take up a guard near to her, though he allowed her enough space for her to be comfortable.

Inevitably, though, he would drift closer to her through the course of the night until she awoke fully to find him a scant hand’s breadth or so from her. And he always seemed deeply irritated when in the morning he awoke and realized what he had done, as if he had been unable to keep himself from it. The mornings after these nights were always a little tense and silent, neither of them willing to address the matter aloud.

On Kagome's part it was largely uncertainty that left her silent. In the complete disorientation that had followed her rescue such close contact between them had not felt at all strange or improper. In a clearer state of mind it was not hard to see how compromising it all potentially was, them traveling alone together and sleeping so closely.

Still, it was hard to deny him the desire to keep an eye on her after all that had happened. It was harder to deny that she enjoyed the comfort of having him close by as she slept. In the end she said nothing to deter him from doing it, assuring herself that as soon as they arrived back in court things would go back to the way that they were supposed to be.

There proved to be little reason for his over-protectiveness. Remarkably they did not encounter a single youkai on the whole of their journey. Even stranger, Kagome could hardly sense any as they went. Usually the pressure of youki on her spiritual sense was constant as she travelled outside the court, but there were long moments at a time that she could sense nothing at all. It was slightly disconcerting, and she was not at all sure what to make of it.

In a little less than a week's time the outer gates of the court came into sight. For the first time in what seemed like forever, Inuyasha slowed his pace.

"We need to go in by the East Gate," he said, almost more to himself than to her. "Less people that way."

Less people to see him sneak back in, Kagome realized. She had suspected that he had snuck out of the court again, but some part of her had hoped that he had gone to the trouble of creating some pretense to give to the courtiers before departing this time. So much for that hope. She sighed.

As he turned his steps towards the East Gate, Kagome noticed his hand moving absently upward toward the nenju. She frowned.

"If it's bothering you that much, you don't have to wear it anymore," she said, pointing to the beads.

He blinked, glancing down at his hand as if he had only just realized what it was doing. He hastily dropped his hand back to his side, turning his head away as much as he could with her on his back. The move failed to hide entirely the faint red on his cheeks.

"Feh," was all the response she got.

Kagome's frown deepened. Throughout the entire journey back she had periodically observed him fiddling with the nenju and she could only assume it was irritating him. Perhaps she had made it too small and he had only been tolerating wearing it for her sake up to this point.

"Here, if I just undo the spiritual links holding the beads together…" she said, reaching over his shoulder to lay a hand on it.

He caught her wrist, stopping her hand just short of it. Kagome blinked, turning her eyes to his face. He shot a sharp glance at her over his shoulder.

"You gave it to me, remember?" he groused. "So it's mine. So just leave it."

Kagome blinked at him, bemused.

"If you say so," she said, lowering her hand.

"I do," he said firmly. "Now come on."

He started forward once more towards the gate. Not too long after she caught him with his hand on it again. She made no comment, merely observing him discreetly from the corner of her eye.

Perhaps he had not been tugging at it after all. It seemed more of a caress.

* * *

They entered through the East Gate, Inuyasha pulling the hood of the nondescript black cloak he wore over his hakama and karaginu up around his face. The creation of the barrier had allowed for a reduction in the number of guards posted at each gate, so thankfully there was only one man there.

Inuyasha presented him the seal of some minor clan in the court without speaking. The guard looked slightly suspicious, moving as if to have Inuyasha remove his cloak. Kagome intercepted him, presenting the special seal Inuyasha had given her months ago. The guard glanced from it to her, surprise lighting his features. Kagome offered him a perfunctory explanation about her return, claiming some essential piece of knowledge that needed to be imparted to the Tennō before Inuyasha fairly dragged her through the gates.

The cloak assured that Inuyasha went unnoticed as they made their way hurriedly to the Dairi, but the streets he guided them along were relatively empty. It was difficult to tell in so short a time, but it did not seem that the court had erupted into chaos since Inuyasha's departure. Kagome breathed a mental sigh of relief, certain that it must have been Kikyou's efforts that had held things together once again.

She made a mental note to try and find some way to make all of this up to the woman, uncomfortably aware that this was the second time Inuyasha had done something so impractical on her behalf and at Kikyou's expense.

They got past the guards at the outer gate of the Dairi without any issues, both of them taiji-ya of the Tachibana clan who recognized Kagome on sight and trusted her enough not to question her as to her companion. It was as they approached Inuyasha's quarters in the Jijūden that they received their first surprise.

As opposed to the pair that was usually assigned to the entryway of Inuyasha's chambers, there was only one guard. One that Kagome was quite familiar with.

The strained, pale features of Akitoki Hojo lit up at the sight of her.

"K-Kagome-sama," he fairly choked, taking a stumbling step towards her before hesitating as if he could not quite believe his eyes.

"Akitoki-sama," Kagome said, taking it upon herself to close the remaining distance between them. "Are you all alone here? Where is the other guard assigned to this post?"

"Kagome-sama!" he exclaimed, the sound of her voice bringing a violent flush of color to his pallid features. "It truly is you! I am so glad…I thought I might have been hallucinating…but it truly is you!"

He reached out in a gesture that was almost convulsive, his hands closing around both of hers as if to further assure himself of her presence.

"Akitoki-sama, what has happened?" Kagome asked, a cold knot beginning to form in the pit of her stomach.

The haggard look of him, skin almost waxen in hue and eyes hollow with exhaustion, was even more apparent up close. Hojo hesitated for several moments, squeezing her hands anxiously. The flesh of his palms was clammy against hers. Absently she felt Inuyasha looming just behind her, his eyes practically burning holes into their hands as he fought to keep back an outburst that would undoubtedly expose him.

Hojo's eyes darted nervously over her shoulder to Inuyasha's figure, then back towards the entryway to the Tennō's chambers. His eyes returned to her face searchingly, and something inside him appeared to give under the strain of his feelings.

"If anyone can be trusted, surely it is you, Kagome-sama," he said, as if trying to convince himself. "I have managed to keep it quiet thus far. Only those few among my clan who were chosen to serve as guards to his Majesty know what has happened, I swear it. But I am uncertain how much longer I can possibly-"

"Akitoki-sama," Kagome interrupted gently before he could work himself into a real state. "Please, take a deep breath and start from the beginning. Whatever it is, I promise I will do all I can to help you."

Hojo nodded, following her instructions and drawing a deep breath. Some of the panic went out of his features.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. "You have only just returned from such a long journey and already I am forcing all of this upon you. I truly am glad to see you returned safely to the court. I…I t-thought of you often while you were away and prayed for your well-being."

His cheeks pinked faintly, though the flush of color more closely resembled the sick glow of fever on his exhausted features. Kagome offered him a faint smile, touched by his concern for her despite his own obvious strain. A faint growl from behind them, however, quickly put an end to the moment.

Hojo's eyes darted to the hooded figure looming just behind her, his expression shifting uneasily.

"My companion is trustworthy, I assure you," Kagome said hurriedly. "Please continue, Akitoki-sama."

His eyes lingered on Inuyasha for a moment longer before he nodded, though he did not look entirely reassured.

"It was nearly two weeks ago," he resumed. "The day after the wedding ceremony. It was early morning and I was assigned a shift guarding his Majesty's chambers. I encountered her Majesty Fujiwara-sama as I arrived. She was leaving his Majesty's chambers."

"She stopped when she saw me, though, and said something about all of this being mine now to do what I could with it. She said she no longer had the strength to do it herself. I did not understand what she meant, but she hurried off before I could inquire further. I have never seen her Majesty look so…distraught before."

"I went into his Majesty's chambers, to ask if I should go after her Majesty. His…His Majesty was not there. I searched and I waited, but his Majesty was nowhere to be found. After some time I began to worry, and I decided to go after her Majesty to see if she knew where his Majesty might be."

"I went to the Fujiwara residence in search of her Majesty. I found it almost entirely empty, save a few servants cleaning up what was left. When I asked one of them what was happening, all she could tell me was that her Majesty had decided to go to the Fujiwara residence outside of the court for a time. Her Majesty had not said when she would return or…or anything else at all."

"I knew then that something must be wrong. For her Majesty to simply…simply leave so shortly after the marriage ceremony…and to clear out her residence so completely, taking even her servants with her…I told the remaining servants not to breathe a word of her Majesty's departure on pain of punishment and hurried back to his Majesty's chambers. His Majesty did not return. His Majesty…has not returned."

"I had no idea what to do. So I continued to stand guard as if his Majesty were still here. No one else seemed to be aware of his Majesty's departure, so I decided to follow the only instinct I had. I decided to conceal his Majesty's absence. I knew the court would dissolve into chaos if it got out that his Majesty had disappeared without a word, and her Majesty, as well. So I hid it all."

"I confirmed that her Majesty had departed through the East Gate with the guard who had been on duty there, and that she had taken a guard with her for protection. Thankfully he was a kinsman of mine and agreed to help me keep the matter quiet. I tried to find out when his Majesty had departed, as well, and if the Tennō-sama had left word with anyone as to where his Majesty was going. I was afraid to inquire too far, though, as I did not want to risk revealing that his Majesty was gone. And so I was unable to discover anything. I still know nothing of his Majesty's whereabouts, or when his Majesty will return."

"Even so, I believed that his Majesty would return. I enlisted the help of a few of my clansmen among his Majesty's guard who I am certain are trustworthy beyond a doubt. They have helped me to maintain the appearance that his Majesty is still present within the court and to circulate the rumor that his and her Majesty have merely withdrawn for a time to…ah, celebrate their new union in private. The pretense has been plausible enough thus far to hold up under the scrutiny of the courtiers, but I do not know how much longer I can-"

Abruptly Hojo stopped speaking, his eyes growing wide. Kagome glimpsed a flash of blood red out of her corner of her eye.

Inuyasha had lowered the hood of the dark cloak, stepping forward to reveal himself to the guardsman. Hojo's face went through such a range of colors in that instant that Kagome feared he might pass out. At last he stumbled forward a step before bowing so low that he nearly fell over.

"T-Tennō-sama," he stuttered, his voice emerging as a squeak.

"Akitoki Hojo, right?" Inuyasha said, features tense with the effort he was making to hold on to some composure in front of the man. "You and your clansmen have done well. I am grateful for your efforts and you will all be rewarded accordingly. For the time being, though, I dismiss you to go rest. I will be counting on you to maintain the silence you have kept so well this far. My reasons for departing are my own, but I give you my word that they were worthy."

Unconsciously he glanced at Kagome. Hojo followed the line of his gaze and some sort of understanding lit his features.

"I am glad to have been of service, your Majesty," he said, bowing once more and with a little more grace. "Though no reward is necessary. To see your Majesty and Kagome-sama back safely is all that I require. I will take my leave now. Please summon me if you require anything further."

He started down the walkway that went over the water, casting a glance backwards at Kagome as he went. She watched him go, her head a mess of information. Beneath it all, though, she realized how grossly she had underestimated him. Of all people she would never have suspected sweet, shy Akitoki Hojo of something like this. And yet he had likely just saved the court from tumbling back down into the depths of another throne war.

He offered her a small smile before disappearing beyond the line of her sight, and she wondered how much of it had been for her sake.

Inuyasha swept past her into his chambers, the motion enough to draw her from the whirl of her own thoughts for a moment. She moved to follow him and then hesitated, wondering if he would want her around at the moment.

Kikyou had left the court. They were married-it was difficult to pry her mind away from that fact, though she was aware it was hardly the most important one among all that had just been told-and Kikyou had left the court without so much as a word to anyone. It was difficult to believe, but at the same time it made all the sense in the world.

They had married and almost immediately after Inuyasha had dropped everything to come after her. If she had been grateful before for what he had done, it paled in comparison to the awe and trepidation that swept through her now. She had known that he had risked a great deal in leaving the court to come to her aid, but truly she had had no idea at all.

Kagome could not avoid seeing it through Kikyou's eyes, though. Only just married and the man with whom she had been in love for years had decided to run off after another woman. Likely he had not even been able to give her much of an explanation as to why he was going, beyond simply that he had a bad feeling.

He had only been trying to keep the promise he had made to protect her, but something like that would have been impossible to understand for Kikyou in light of everything else. And she had been left to hold everything together all on her own.

Kagome was disappointed at the path the noblewoman had chosen, knowing full well as she did the disaster that might have resulted from her defection, but it was not difficult to understand why she had done it. Her heart was broken.

Kagome sighed, deciding to go in after Inuyasha. She was not quite ready to venture out and risk being seen by anyone else in the court, after all, and there was really no use in delaying the inevitable. Better that they try and sort out this mess as soon as possible.

Inside the room was so dark that Kagome stumbled over a cushion, unable to see much beyond her own nose as her eyes adjusted. Inuyasha had not even bothered to light a lantern, despite the darkness that was rapidly descending outside.

Once her eyes had adjusted enough to make out the outlines of things, she could see Inuyasha standing in the far corner near the low desk that held all his stacks of papers. He was holding something-it was hard to tell what-and standing very still.

Kagome stumbled a few more steps into the room until she reached the spot where she remembered one of the lanterns was usually kept. She groped about until she found the flint that sat beside it, striking it until a spark caught the wick inside the lantern. She lifted the light, turning back towards Inuyasha with it.

He still had not moved. He was staring down at the piece of parchment clutched in his hands, the line of his jaw set hard.

"W-what is it?" Kagome asked softly, not daring to venture any closer to him.

"She's gone," he said lowly, more to himself than to her. "She's gonna live outside the court from now on. She says she's not coming back. That I…I betrayed her…"

He was silent for several moments. Abruptly his face twisted in a snarl and he tore the note to pieces. His fist came down atop the low wooden desk and the thing splintered with a crack that was nearly deafening in the silence of the room. Kagome flinched.

"Fuck!" the hanyou shouted, the word on the verge of cracking as it left him. "Fuck! Damn it!"

It was difficult to tell from a distance, but Kagome thought she saw his hands shaking. She took a tentative step towards him.

"Inuyasha-"

"What did she expect me to do?!" he shouted, turning blazing eyes on her. "Was I supposed to just let you die?! Kami…how could she just…!?"

He cut himself off, the blaze of his anger abruptly dimming.

"…what was I supposed to do?" he murmured hoarsely. "I swore I wouldn't leave her. I swore I'd take care of her. For years, all I've been doing is running my mouth and promising her things. And it's all just been…it's all just been bullshit. I can't do anything for her. I thought if we…If we could just get through the wedding, then I'd…kami, I really fucked up this time…"

His lips twisted in a grimace of self-disgust. Kagome bit her lip, taking another cautious step towards him.

"Inuyasha," she said gently. "You haven't failed anyone. Fujiwara-sama is upset. She has misunderstood. We will summon her back. I will explain everything that happened and she will understand. She will forgive you. If you hadn't come for me, I would likely be dead now. Or…or worse. Surely Fujiwara-sama will understand that what you did was honorable."

Inuyasha raised his gaze to her, eyes dark. For a moment she saw that look in his eyes once more, the one she had seen time and again on their journey back to the court. Something terrified and tender all at the same time. Something she did not understand. Something she did not think he meant for her to see there. He looked away.

"Don't get me wrong, Kagome," he said lowly. "I don't regret what I did. I don't…I'll never regret coming after you. But I'm all Kikyou's got. And she's put up with a lot of shit for my sake. I can't leave her. I can't."

Kagome's heart twitched in her chest. She ignored it. She had known full well what she was coming back to.

"I know. I understand."

Their eyes met and held. She offered him a small smile. His expression remained heavy.

"Alright," he said. "I need to go after her. Make sure she's safe. If I hurry I can get there in a few days-"

He was already moving towards the entryway as he spoke, and Kagome caught hold of his arm to stop him.

"Inuyasha, wait," she said. "You can't possibly be thinking of going after her right now."

"You think I'm gonna wait?" he countered. "We both know how dangerous it is out there, Kagome. I can't just sit on my ass around here doing nothing."

"Just think for a moment, Inuyasha," Kagome pressed insistently. "You can't just go running off without a plan. If you leave now I will be as hard-pressed as Akitoki-sama to continue covering your absence. We simply can't continue to hide it for much longer. We need to come up with some sort of plan before you go. To at least have you show your face before the court and give some sort of excuse for going out for a time."

"Kagome…"

"Please, Inuyasha," she begged. "Just a day. Just give me one day to figure everything out before you go. Akitoki-sama said that Fujiwara-sama took a guard with her, so she should be safe. Besides, you've been traveling with barely any rest for days on end now. I know you're not human, but even you have to rest sometimes. I won't be able to do anything but worry for you if you leave without at least a night's sleep first."

It was this last bit that truly seemed to soften him, though he scoffed at the mention of him requiring rest. After a moment of indecision he gave a reluctant nod.

"Fine," he said. "We've got one day to figure it out before I go after her."

Kagome nodded, relieved. Exhaustion was beginning to settle slowly over her like a shroud. She was grateful for even the short reprieve that a night would provide.

"Good," she said. "Then I am going to retire for night to rest. Please do the same. I'll return early in the morning so that we can discuss everything and decide what needs to be done. Good night, Inuyasha."

The warmth of his hand around her wrist brought her up short as she turned to go. When she turned back to look at him she found his eyes fixed on the floor between them.

"Wait," he said, followed by a long beat of silence.

Kagome watched him uncertainly, the angle of his head making his expression almost impossible to read.

"They might not…have your rooms set for you anymore," he said at length, voice scarcely above a mumble. "You should…You should stay here for the night."

Kagome blinked, a flush that she could not control creeping across her cheeks.

"Here?" she echoed dumbly.

His eyes darted up to meet hers, a flash of his usual ire in the twitch of one dark brow even as red suffused his cheeks.

"What?" he snapped. "You'd rather stay in some dusty, stinking room that might not even have a futon in it?"

"N-No," Kagome stammered, shaking her head. "But…I mean, in here…"

She trailed off, feeling her face heat further. It was not that she thought he had any untoward intentions. If that had ever been his aim there had been innumerable chances for him to act during the course of their journey back to the court when they had slept side by side.

But she had convinced herself that things would go immediately back to normal once they returned to court and the thought of them spending the entire night alone together in his chambers just seemed so…taboo somehow. To say nothing of the scandal it would cause should they be discovered-

"Look," Inuyasha bit out, breaking her out of her thoughts before she could work herself into a real state. "I always sleep on the cushions anyway. You'll have the whole futon to yourself. It's practically the same thing as when we were out there."

He flapped his free hand in a vague gesture that she supposed was meant to indicate their time outside the court. Abruptly she realized that if she returned to the Chūgū's residence tonight, it would be the first time day or night they would be apart since he had come to her rescue.

With a twinge she realized that she was not quite ready for that yet.

She blinked, eyes turning up to scan his face. With such a flimsy pretense as his excuse-there were, after all, a great many rooms in the Chūgū's residence, one of which certainly had to be fit to be slept in-it was hard not to wonder if perhaps Inuyasha's feelings ran along the same line as her own. Kagome felt her expression soften.

"Alright," she said.

He blinked, surprised. He had expected her to put up more of a fight.

"A-Alright," he echoed a bit woodenly, nodding. "Fine, then."

"Thank you," Kagome added softly, hoping he realized that it was for more than just the place to sleep.

"Yeah," he said, a faint curl at the corner of his lips betraying the gruffness of the response.

His hand lingered around her wrist for several moments longer than necessary before releasing her. He cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Well, I'm gonna…"

He gestured vaguely towards the cushions before turning and going to flop down on a pile of them. Kagome smiled after him before heading towards the futon.

It was much larger than what she was used to. She rolled onto her back, stretching out her arms as far as they could go. It felt so wonderful to be lying on a proper bed once more. She rolled onto her side to settle in and realized that everything smelled faintly of Inuyasha. She fought against the urge to inhale deeply, losing the battle within moments.

She was aware that she should not have been as comfortable as she was given the situation. Setting aside the potentially disastrous scandal it might cause in the court should word ever get out, Inuyasha was married now. The very bed she was lying on should by all logic have been the conjugal bed, had things not gone so badly between them. The thought sobered her mood slightly.

Not by much, though. She could sense Inuyasha's presence nearby and smell him all around her. Everything was in chaos and he wanted her close by. She wanted to be close by. Nothing untoward would happen. Surely she could indulge herself for just one more night.

She inhaled deeply once more and was asleep before she knew it.

* * *

She was half roused at some point-it was difficult to tell when in the darkness of the room and through the haze of sleep that still held her-by a shifting of the futon. She murmured something garbled that was her sleep-addled mind's attempt at a question. A shushing noise issued from somewhere behind her.

"This is…this is the last time, okay?"

Warm arms wrapped about her waist. Kagome relaxed, twisting instinctively to press herself against that familiar solid warmth.

"Dammit, Kagome."

The arms twined more tightly about her, pressing her close. Kagome half-smiled in her sleep, an unthinking certainty settling over her of the absolute rightness of the moment. She drifted back into a deep sleep quickly.

* * *

"You are certain it was that dog's son that came for her?"

"Yes, Naraku-sama. It was the former Tennō-sama's blade that broke your barrier. It was the current Tennō-sama who came for her."

Silence reigned in the darkness for several long moments.

"I see," the first voice said at last, satisfaction curling lowly through it. "They are proving themselves to be greater fools than I ever could have imagined. So be it, though, if they are willing to build their own pyres to lie down on. It seems this was not a loss, after all."

"…What are my orders, Naraku-sama?" came a third voice.

"No orders, Kagura," the former voice returned coolly. "You will wait. Given time and a little encouragement, they will do my work for me. I will provide the encouragement, of course. The wind from the beating of a moth's wing has brought a useful bit of information that even you failed to provide me, Kagura. Boy."

"Yes, Naraku-sama?"

"It seems you have not yet outlived your usefulness. You have one more mission to carry out for me before I do you the kindness of death. Fail me again, however, and I will be certain to stain your hands with the blood of so many men, women, and children that not even the deepest layer of hellfire will be able to burn the stain from your soul."

The true terror of the words was in the almost passionless tone that they were spoken.

"Yes, Naraku-sama."

"Good. Then it seems that time will be my last enemy. Let the battle commence."

* * *

Some sound, loud and persistent, was trying to draw Kagome away from the comfort of oblivion and the warmth curling lowly in her stomach. Surely nothing could be better than this feeling, this unthinking contentment, and she struggled to cling to the sleep that was fast escaping her-a losing battle, as she was already conscious enough to be aware of the struggle itself. Something shifted behind her and she gave the fight over with a sigh, shifting enough to blink blearily behind her.

Wide golden eyes met her own. Suddenly Kagome was very much awake.

The situation was not at all like what it had been outside of the court. No, it was undeniably intimate. Kagome felt a flush that was not entirely of embarrassment sweep across her skin.

Her body was pressed along the solid length of his from shoulder to foot, her hips tucked neatly into the cradle of his own. One large, clawed hand was splayed across her hip. The other hand…her hakama had come untucked as she slept and his hand now rested perilously close to the bindings that were the only thing left to conceal her chest. A flare of warmth curled sharply through her at the realization.

Neither of them seemed capable of moving. The pupils of his eyes were so far dilated she could scarcely see the line of gold that ringed them. He was not breathing, and neither was she. At last he shifted, but it was not away from her-

"Tennō-sama! Your Majesty! Please, your Majesty…please, it is an urgent matter!"

Kagome gasped, jerking herself away so forcefully that she accidentally elbowed the hanyou squarely in the stomach. He swore loudly, but she was too busy scrambling free of the futon to concern herself. Her heart was hammering inside her ribcage and her body felt uncomfortably heated.

The voice was the one that had woken her in the first place, she realized, though thankfully it was coming from outside of the entryway. They hadn't been seen.

"Inuyasha," she hissed, careful to keep her voice low enough to avoid being heard. "Hurry and answer him!"

He scowled at her, his hand pressed to the spot where her elbow had connected with his gut. Kagome frowned at him, gesturing insistently with her head towards the entryway hanging.

"What is it?" Inuyasha called.

"Please, your Majesty," the guard answered, tone coloring with relief at at last receiving a response. "Your Majesty's presence is urgently required at the Western Gate. He is…he is calling for your Majesty to come out, or else he will attempt to tear down his Majesty's barrier."

Inuyasha and Kagome exchanged a sharp glance.

"What?" Inuyasha snapped, addressing the guard once more. "Who?"

There was a moment of hesitation outside the entryway.

"It…it is your Lord brother. He has returned."

Inuyasha's eyes widened. He tensed, his jaw clenching so tightly Kagome could see the muscle there tic.

"Sesshoumaru."


	27. Of Family and Fatigue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our need-to-know info for this chapter:
> 
> -'this Sesshoumaru': As many of you who watched the Japanese version of the anime likely know, Sesshoumaru refers to himself as 'kono Sesshoumaru', or literally 'this Sesshoumaru' (I can't recall if in the English dub they attempt to translate this into something similar or not). Basically it's just a very high-brow or haughty way of referring to one's self in Japanese (any character you ever hear address him/herself as 'kono ore' or 'kono watashi' is generally stressing their own self-importance, if it's not being done merely in jest). I wanted to note it because I thought it would be especially fitting to maintain that manner of speaking in this fic, so when you see him calling himself by that you now know why.
> 
> -daiyoukai: Also written as 'taiyoukai' in English sometimes (though I'm relatively certain this is a translation error). The kanji for 'dai' (the prefix of the word) is the same as is found in daimyō (provincial lords of Japan pre-Meiji era). Essentially it only means 'big' (as in the sense of important or powerful), but there is there is a long-standing association with nobility or property ownership. Thus a 'daiyoukai', as the term is used in the Inuyasha series, means both a very powerful youkai and one who has either the distinction of nobility or land ownership. I'll be using the term in essentially the same manner.
> 
> -tsukemono: Pickled vegetables commonly used as side or small dishes during the Heian period (also still eaten frequently today in Japan).

* * *

Almost more quickly than her eyes could follow, Inuyasha was up and moving. He paused only long enough to scoop up the sheathed sword that had lain beside the futon, tucking it into his waistband before striding grim-faced towards the entryway.

He paused with his hand to the entryway hanging, casting a look back at her. He mouthed two words to her, careful to keep the guard waiting outside from discovering her presence in the room. And then he was gone, disappearing beyond the entryway hanging in a sweep of intricately embroidered fabric.

Stay here. That was what he had mouthed to her.

Kagome scoffed. As if that was going to happen.

She scrambled up from her place beside the futon, hands fumbling as she worked to right her sleep-mussed clothing. A moment of thought slowed her haste. The guards would undoubtedly follow Inuyasha as he left the Dairi, saving her from being seen, but she needed to make certain that his group was far enough ahead before she ventured to follow them. Her clothing aright once more, her hands went automatically to work on the snarls in her hair even as her mind worked frantically.

Inuyasha's brother. Kagome strained to recall any detail she could about him. Half-brother, she recalled clearly enough from the few times Inuyasha had even been willing to mention him. The child of the former Tennō and his Empress. A full-blooded youkai and older than Inuyasha by…well, she was not sure by how much. A number of clans were attached to the idea of him as the Tennō rather than Inuyasha, the Taira among them from what she understood. And Sango had mentioned that he had gone abroad to study in…China, was it?

Well, it did not matter much where. He was here now and, if Inuyasha and the guard's reactions were any indication, it was hardly for a friendly visit.

Kagome rose, tying her hair back in a low tail. Surely enough time had passed. She moved towards the entryway hanging, moving it aside just enough to peek out.

She blinked hard, the light of a burgeoning spring morning harsh after the relative dimness of Inuyasha's chamber. As her eyes adjusted she saw she had been right. The guards that were normally posted before Inuyasha's chambers were nowhere to be seen. They had followed him out to his brother.

Kagome started out at a brisk pace that developed quickly into a run, worried that the delay would cause her to miss something. Inuyasha's expression upon learning that his brother had returned…there was no telling what he might do if left to his own devices.

She managed to get far enough from Inuyasha's chambers that her presence in the Dairi would no longer be suspect without being spotted, and she was soon beyond the outer gates of the Dairi. As she turned her steps towards the Western Gate she entered a stream of courtiers flowing in the same direction. Obviously some sort of word had gotten out.

Kagome heard a number of cries and murmurs of surprise break out around her as she wove her way through the crowds, but she did not break stride to address them. There would be time enough later to announce and explain her return to the court. For the moment she quickened her pace further, ducking her head low to avoid recognition as much as was possible.

There was a great mass gathered about the Western Gate by the time Kagome arrived. Mentally she groaned. Whatever was going to happen, almost the entire court would stand witness to it. Besides which she could not spot Inuyasha amidst the throng. Kagome frowned, eyes scanning the crowd for several long moments before she decided that it was best to just push headlong into the center.

With no small amount of twisting and pushing and an abundance of murmured apologies, she managed to make her way to the innermost ring of the group. The courtiers had stopped just short of the gate, crowded close about it without actually passing beyond the protection that it and the youki barrier provided. Incredulous murmurs buzzed in Kagome's ears from all sides, but she was too occupied with her search for the hanyou to catch more than a few scattered words.

There!

He stood just outside of the gates, frame so rigid he was nearly vibrating with tension. One clawed hand flexed threateningly just over the hilt of Tessaiga. His back was turned fully to her where he stood, but even without being able to see his expression his agitation was clear as day. The several guards that had followed him from the Dairi, along with the pair who were assigned to guard the gate, stood ranged just behind him, their stances uncertain.

There was another man there, as well, standing alone opposite the group and facing the gate. Immediately Kagome knew him to be Inuyasha's brother. The similarities were too striking for it to be otherwise.

The man was beautiful. The inhuman beauty that only youkai could possess, the beauty of impossibly symmetrical features and skin that appeared to have a luminescence all its own. His hair was the same shade of silver as Inuyasha's, his eyes the same striking gold. Somehow he appeared both more and less human than the hanyou.

His beauty was not the sort that drew one in, though. There was something hard and cold to it, like the edge of a jewel. Kagome was surprised to find that something in her disliked him almost instantly, though it was difficult to tell how much of the feeling was merely solidarity with Inuyasha.

She hesitated where she stood. Silence stretched tensely between the two parties outside of the gate, neither moving a muscle. Inuyasha's brother, whose expression Kagome could see clearly from where she stood, was entirely stone-faced as he stared down the Tennō, though there was a sharpness to his eyes that betrayed something more than complete calm. Much as she was inclined to go to Inuyasha's side, Kagome dared not move.

Inuyasha was the one to break the tense stand-off, his patience quickly strained beyond its limits.

"What do you want, Sesshoumaru?" he snapped, hand coming down that last twitch to grip the hilt of his sword.

Inwardly Kagome winced as the chattering around her grew in volume. Whatever the circumstances, that was surely no way to address his brother and the man who might himself have been Tennō had things been different. With nearly the entire court watching, Kagome prayed that Inuyasha would at least be able to partly control his temper.

Outwardly nothing in Sesshoumaru's expression shifted in the least, but Kagome could sense a flare in his youki even through the youki of Inuyasha's barrier. It was beyond simple anger. No, this loathing she sensed went far deeper than anything so mundane.

It was a moment before the man deigned to speak, his eyes scanning with slow deliberation over the outer wall of the court and the guards before returning to Inuyasha.

"Surely my honored father must have been out of his mind at the end of his life," he spoke at last, his slow, measured manner every bit what Kagome had always imagined the epitome of a courtier to be. "To have his lands become nothing more than the plaything of a pathetic half-breed. To be forced to watch from his grave as every moment the honored legacy of the Tennō is thrown further and further into disgrace. No, this Sesshoumaru sees it clearly now. Near the end of his life my honored father must have gone mad."

"The hell are you babbling about, Sesshoumaru?!" Inuyasha barked. "Aren't you the one who barged in here threatening to tear down the barrier? You think the old ma-You think our father would approve of that?!"

"This Sesshoumaru had every intention of abiding by my honored father's last will," Sesshoumaru continued as if Inuyasha had not spoken. "Mystified as this Sesshoumaru was by what had transpired, this Sesshoumaru nonetheless retired to the court of the Emperor of China to further my studies. This Sesshoumaru had no intention of dirtying my hands with petty power struggles. No, waiting was enough. My honored father had given the court an object lesson. Knowledge of what it was to live beneath an unfit ruler. Surely it was only a matter of time until the hanyou's own weakness brought him down. And then this Sesshoumaru would return to assume my rightful place, and in their gratitude the court would never again speak of allowing anyone save the pure-blooded of the line to assume the throne."

The man paused, eyeing Inuyasha. Contempt hooded his gaze, the corners of his mouth dragged downward ever so slightly by it.

"You, however, were not content merely to fail," he said lowly. "No. Did you think that word of your transgressions would not reach the Chinese court? You invite common-born filth into my honored father's court and claim that you will stand with them. You cast aside the screen and wander among the court as you wish, lowering the title of Tennō and stripping it of all honor and meaning. Did you think this Sesshoumaru would allow it? Whatever my honored father's will might have been, this Sesshoumaru will put an end to this blasphemy here and now."

Inuyasha's posture straightened, though his hand remained firmly on Tessaiga's hilt. Kagome edged forward anxiously among the crowd, wishing she could catch a glimpse of his expression.

"So basically," returned the hanyou. "All that whining was just to say that you're pissed you got passed over for the throne, huh?"

Sesshoumaru did not respond. In fact, he was no longer there.

In the space of the time it had taken her to blink the youkai had closed in on Inuyasha, the claws of one hand glowing an acidic green as he brought them down atop his brother's head. A collective cry went up amongst the courtiers as Inuyasha narrowly dodged, rolling out from beneath his brother's reach and back up into a low crouch.

Sesshoumaru pivoted, unfazed, and in another move that Kagome could scarcely follow with her eyes he was nearly on Inuyasha once more. This time Inuyasha leapt up and away, landing further from the gate as the youkai's glowing claws dissolved a hole in the earth where he had been standing.

Kagome's eyes widened. If there had ever been any question of Sesshoumaru being the son of a daiyoukai, there was none in her mind now.

She dashed forward past the gate and the barrier, grateful she had thought to bring her bow just in case. She saw several of the guards move forward, as well, weapons at the ready.

"Stop!" Inuyasha barked, bringing them all up short. "Don't interfere! This is between me and him, so stay out of it!"

Kagome frowned, heart jumping in her chest as she watched another poisonous blow land mere breaths away from the hanyou. The youkai was fast. Perhaps faster than Inuyasha. And as of yet he had not made use of even a fraction of the power she could sense in him. She knew Inuyasha was strong-had witnessed it with her own eyes a number of times-but this would not be an easy victory even for him.

Still, he was right. Any interference by her or the guards might only serve to complicate things. Sesshoumaru's objective was Inuyasha alone, and he did not strike her as the type to spare anyone who happened to get between him and his goal. So she gripped her bow, watching. She could hold herself back. She would wait and see.

Inuyasha dodged yet another attack, so narrowly this time that a trailing lock of his hair was dissolved entirely by the youkai's poison. He skidded to a halt in the dirt several lengths away, and suddenly Kagome realized why he had done nothing but dodge thus far. He was guiding Sesshoumaru as far away from the gate as possible.

Now, backed up against the tree line with Sesshoumaru on the advance once more, Inuyasha squared his stance. His hand went to the hilt of his sword.

Ignoring the calls of the guards, Kagome rushed forward. They had gotten too far away. She would not interfere needlessly, but she wanted to be close enough to see what was going on.

In a flash Tessaiga was unsheathed, flaring to life like a beacon in her sixth sense. Inuyasha swung the flat of the blade up just in time to block Sesshoumaru's claws. The poison of the full youkai's claws did not seem to effect the blade in the least, and with a grunt Inuyasha forced Sesshoumaru back.

The full youkai twisted in mid-air, landing lightly several lengths away and several lengths too close to where Kagome had come to stand. Her heart leapt in her chest, and she hurriedly ducked back behind the tree line. Thankfully Sesshoumaru either did not notice her or did not care enough to acknowledge her presence.

His eyes were fixed on Inuyasha or, more accurately, on the sword Inuyasha held. As close as she now found herself to the full youkai, Kagome could just make out the red seeping in around the corners of his eyes. The surge in his youki, however, she would have been able to sense even from a distance.

"Father's sword," he said, tone still entirely controlled though it had lost all trace of its former unconcern. "The Tessaiga…How did a half-breed come into possession of my father's fang?"

Inuyasha scowled, hefting the massive sword easily to point it at his brother.

"In case you forgot," he snapped. "He was my old man, too. And I'm the one he chose to inherit the throne. I created the barrier using this sword. The Tessaiga is mine."

"The Tessaiga and the throne are the legacy of my bloodline and should never have fallen into the hands of a mongrel like you," Sesshoumaru returned, and Kagome could see the fangs in his mouth elongating as he spoke. "Your whore of a mother led my father astray. Her human frailty made him weak and brought him to his end. This Sesshoumaru was mistaken to allow this farce to continue for so long. This Sesshoumaru will rectify that mistake now."

"You want the sword?" Inuyasha snarled, baring his own fangs at the mention of his mother. "Come and take it from me, asshole!"

Kagome winced at the complete degeneration of his language, absently glad they had moved far enough that the rest of the court could not overhear them. She had little time to entertain the thought, though, as the flare of Sesshoumaru's youki abruptly shifted into something else entirely.

He was consumed in a swirling cloud of his own youki, his form obscured for several moments. The cloud shifted and expanded, flaring to a high point before dissolving.

Where once Sesshoumaru had stood there was now a towering white dog. No, it was Sesshoumaru still. Kagome gaped, unaccustomed to seeing the transformation occur before her very eyes. To think that that was the form hidden beneath the semblance of humanity…a part of her wondered suddenly if Inuyasha's face hid something similar beneath it.

The crescent moon that had marked his forehead remained on this form, as did a more jagged version of the stripes that had lined his cheeks, though they now served to outline a gaping maw of teeth that Kagome was certain were larger than herself. The lush silver fur that rippled along the massive body was the same shade that his hair had been and his eyes had been entirely consumed by the red that had begun to bleed into them at the sight of Tessaiga.

This was the true form of a daiyoukai. Kagome felt the hair along the back of her neck prickle.

For a long moment neither moved. Inuyasha stood firm, sword at the ready. Sesshoumaru watched him through red eyes, tail writhing and twisting behind him.

And then, as if they had both received some simultaneous signal, they were barreling towards one another. Inuyasha swung Tessaiga in a wide arc, aiming for one of Sesshoumaru's front legs. Sesshoumaru leapt clear of the hanyou, landing several lengths away before turning and charging back towards him. Inuyasha pivoted as well, using the force of the turn to propel himself in a single bound towards Sesshoumaru.

Too slow, though, and without anything to check him he sailed headlong into the cloud of noxious green poison that Sesshoumaru had just exhaled. Kagome could not keep herself from crying out to him, watching the exposed flesh of his hands and face bubble and dissolve as the poison touched it. He stumbled, momentarily blinded as the poison penetrated his eyes and lungs. He caught himself with Tessaiga, plunging the blade into the ground to hold himself upright as he hacked and coughed on the noxious fumes scorching his throat.

Sesshoumaru did not allow him time to recover. Immune to the poison himself, he bounded into the cloud of it and raised a massive paw, swiping at Inuyasha. The blow landed firmly and Inuyasha, weakened by the poison, went flying. The Tessaiga, however, remained planted firmly in the ground where he had left it.

Rather than pursuing Inuyasha further to push his advantage, Sesshoumaru paused where he loomed over the sword buried in the earth. In swirl of red youki he reverted back to his humanoid form. He hesitated, the sword of his father just within his reach.

He reached out and grasped it.

There was another flare of strange youki that Kagome felt crackle along her sixth sense like a whip. She blinked hard, her vision obscured for a long moment by it.

When her vision cleared, she gasped.

An old, rusted blade. That was all that Sesshoumaru now held in his hand. The Tessaiga had reverted.

Sesshoumaru raised the blade before his face, a faint frown creasing his brow. Kagome could sense the flare of his youki, could feel him willing the sword back to life. Something in the blade repelled his youki entirely, though, and the legendary sword remained no more than piece of rusted iron in his hands.

"Sesshoumaru!"

The cry was all the warning the youkai got as Inuyasha's fist came crashing down where he stood, the earth buckling beneath the force of it. Sesshoumaru leapt up and away, narrowly dodging the blow. Inuyasha scowled at him, the skin of his face and hands still an angry red from the poison but quickly healing. His movements appeared to have slowed, though, and Kagome worried that the poison had done more damage than was apparent.

"What curse have you laid on my father's sword, half-breed, that it responds only to your filthy blood?" Sesshoumaru spoke, landing lightly several lengths from the hanyou.

Inuyasha's eyes flicked for a moment to the untransformed blade in the full youkai's hand. A smirk ticked up one corner of his lips briefly.

"What's the matter, Sesshoumaru?" he said. "All that squeaky clean blood and you still can't get your sword to work? It's 'cause Tessaiga ain't yours, asshole."

He flexed one clawed hand, the knuckles popping loudly as he tensed to spring once more. The corners of Sesshoumaru's mouth turned down slightly in distaste.

"You lie," he said coolly. "Though it is to be expected. No matter. When you are dead Tessaiga will be freed of whatever stain you have placed upon it."

He turned the blade, tucking it deliberately away at his waist.

Almost as one the brothers moved, leaping towards one another. Inuyasha swung first, his claws narrowly missing Sesshoumaru's face. Sesshoumaru caught the offending arm at the wrist, twisting until Kagome could see Inuyasha's elbow pop out at an odd angle even beneath the voluminous fabric of his sleeve. She cried out as Inuyasha grunted in pain, watching as Sesshoumaru used the momentum to fling Inuyasha down hard onto the earth.

The hanyou landed with a jolt, his one arm lying useless at his side. Sesshoumaru was on him before he could recover, the green glow of his poison illuminating his hand as he levered it over his brother's throat.

With a jolt he leapt back, a glowing arrow narrowly missing him.

He turned a glare on Kagome where she stood, bow poised and readying another arrow. She had emerged from her place just beyond the line of trees, unable to hold herself back from the fight any longer.

"You would allow a human woman to fight your battles for you now?" Sesshoumaru said, glancing sidelong at Inuyasha on the ground. "Truly there are no depths that you will not sink to, half-breed."

"Kagome!" Inuyasha shouted, struggling to lever himself up with his one good arm. "You moron! Hurry, run-!"

But the warning came too late. Sesshoumaru was upon her, faster than she could even move to aim. Kagome found herself lifted from the ground, hefted by one hand as if she weighed no more than a rag doll. Her bow and arrow slipped from her grasp, her hands coming up to scratch vainly at the hand encircling her throat.

She met his eyes, and the look of complete apathy there frightened her more deeply than the greatest hatred could have. Crushing her throat would be to him no more than stepping on an ant in passing.

"Perhaps in your next life you will know better than to interfere in the fights of men and youkai, human," he murmured.

"Kagome!"

There was a pulse of familiar youki. Once, twice, growing stronger and faster. Sesshoumaru's eyes widened, shifting to the sword at his hip.

In a roaring flare of youki the Tessaiga transformed. Sesshoumaru released Kagome abruptly, any thought for her entirely abandoned as he reached to draw the sword from its place at his waist. Kagome coughed and gasped, hands coming up to her bruised throat as her lungs sucked in air greedily.

"No."

She looked up, startled to hear something so close to a cry issue from the stoic man standing above her.

Just as his hand had gone to grasp the hilt, Tessaiga had flown free of its place at his waist and his grip. It sailed directly into Inuyasha's one good hand as the hanyou barreled towards them. Sesshoumaru's jaw twitched, red bleeding into his eyes around the edges once more.

He finally saw it. Their father's sword had chosen Inuyasha.

He could do no more than raise his arm, though, claws beginning once more to gather the sickening green glow of poison, before Inuyasha was on him. He brought Tessaiga down in a wide arc, severing the outstretched arm in a clean swing. It fell, still glowing, at Kagome's feet. She yelped, scooting hastily away from it.

Inuyasha did not let up, his look half-crazed as he drew the sword back and rammed it through his brother's body. It pierced even the spiked pauldron that protected his right shoulder and upper chest, shattering it as if it were made of no more than clay. The Tessaiga impaled Sesshoumaru cleanly, pinning the youkai firmly to the tree behind him. He coughed, blood dribbling from his lips as one of his lungs was punctured.

Inuyasha snarled into the other man's face, lips drawn back away from his teeth. Sesshoumaru, for all that the sword had pierced him through entirely, returned his look with that same controlled expression, only the brightness to his golden eyes betraying his rage.

Inuyasha hesitated.

"Finish it if you can, half-breed," Sesshoumaru murmured through lips wet with blood. "Fail to and this Sesshoumaru will not fail to come for you again, father's sword or not."

Inuyasha set his jaw. With a mighty tug he pulled the blade free of the tree and his brother, raising it to deliver the final blow.

"Wait!"

Inuyasha halted, surprised. Kagome was surprised herself to hear the word coming from her mouth.

Looking at them, though, with hair and eyes so much alike, she could not let Inuyasha go through with it. She had seen his moment of hesitation, despite all the resentment he obviously and rightfully felt towards the other man. Still they were brothers, whatever the circumstances. She could not allow Inuyasha to carry with him for the rest of his life the knowledge that he had slain his own brother.

"Don't," she said, meeting Inuyasha's eyes. "You don't have to kill him. We can…we can imprison him, or something, as punishment for all this, but you don't need to kill him."

She turned, catching Sesshoumaru's gaze on her from where he was slumped at the foot of the tree. His eyes were narrow with resentment as they met hers, his loathing for her undoubtedly sealed by her words. Well, of course he would resent the interference of a human on his behalf. She had hardly expected gratitude.

"Do not-" he started, only to be cut short by the blood filling his throat. He coughed, more of the deep crimson liquid spilling down to further stain the pristine white of his robes.

Daiyoukai or not, he was now short an arm and had been entirely impaled by a powerful youkai blade. Given time Kagome was sure he would recover, but for the moment he was relatively helpless.

Inuyasha looked from her to the youkai, indecision writ clear across his features.

"He almost killed you," he said accusingly.

Kagome blinked.

"I've hardly forgotten," she said a bit wryly. "Nor have I forgotten that he tried to kill you. Still, none of that changes the fact that you've beaten him and we are both of us alive. You don't need his blood on your hands. You don't need to stoop to his level."

Inuyasha scoffed at the same moment that Sesshoumaru made a similar noise, though the blood pooling in his lungs made it more of a gurgle than anything else. Inuyasha's glare returned to him for a long moment, considering. At last he twisted the blade, tucking it in one smooth motion back into the sheath at his waist.

"Fine," he bit out. "Imprisonment it is, if you're so set on it. Pull this shit again, though, and I won't hesitate to cut you down."

Sesshoumaru made no reply, his eyes on the sheathed sword at Inuyasha's waist. His expression was entirely inscrutable now, and Kagome wondered for a moment what was going through his mind. She shook her head, moving to Inuyasha's side.

"Come on. I need you to help me get him into the court and past all of those courtiers. With Midoriko-sama's help I should be able to set up a chamber that will hold him."

* * *

It took a bit of arguing, but eventually Inuyasha sent Kagome to the guards who were still waiting at the gate to come and transport Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha refused to touch the man himself, Kagome was not strong enough to lift him on her own, and Sesshoumaru still had enough in him to protest being handled by a filthy half-breed despite that he was lying in what was quickly becoming a pool of his own blood.

Thus it was that the guards were fetched, deeply uncertain as they hauled up the man who might have been Tennō and brought him back into the court. Inuyasha and Kagome remained with them as they escorted the daiyoukai in, both of them well aware that his wounds were already beginning to close slowly.

In dead silence the courtiers parted to allow the group passage, entirely mystified by and uncertain what to make of this sudden turn of events. Kagome was well aware as they went that there were several clans present who gladly would have seen Inuyasha forced from the throne in favor of Sesshoumaru. They had all just borne witness to Sesshoumaru's defeat at Inuyasha's hand. What thoughts must be going through their heads? Was it dismay that kept them silent?

Midoriko met them near the gate and thankfully seemed to grasp the situation without much explanation. It was a given that Sesshoumaru, because of his status and his dangerous nature, could not be put in a normal cell for imprisonment. Besides which he was in need of at least some medical attention. Midoriko thus suggested one of the many unoccupied wings of the Chūwain. He could have quarters there large enough to keep from offending his status as a son of the former Tennō and she could set up a barrier to keep him contained.

Inuyasha was not particularly fond of the idea of allowing Sesshoumaru any sort of special treatment, but thankfully knew better than to make a fuss about it with the whole court watching. He agreed to Midoriko's proposal and ordered the guard escorting Sesshoumaru to turn towards the Chūwain.

He paused before following them, positioning himself as centrally as he could amongst the throng of courtiers. He addressed them in a carrying voice-thankfully returning once more to a mode of speech more befitting his station, Kagome noted with a mental sigh of relief- informing them that court would be held on the morrow to address any questions that they might have.

After that Inuyasha, Kagome at his side, turned to follow the group escorting Sesshoumaru. Behind them Kagome could see the mass beginning to slowly break up now that the spectacle was over. She was glad Inuyasha had thought to announce the meeting tomorrow,  
though she knew it must have frustrated him to no end to do it when all that he wanted to do was go after Kikyou. There was no telling what sort of wild rumors would spring up if this matter were not addressed and clarified immediately.

Though Inuyasha insisted that he was fine, she forced him to lift his sleeve enough for her to see the arm that Sesshoumaru had nearly twisted free of its socket. He still did not have full use of it and the elbow was bent at an odd angle, but it had improved vastly and would likely be fully healed by evening. His skin, too, showed barely any signs of the poisonous burns and he insisted that his lungs felt fine after inhaling so much of it.

He did not allow her long to fuss over him, though. Now that they were alone -relatively speaking, anyway, as the guards still walked several lengths ahead of them- he did not hesitate to lay into her for her foolishness in interfering in the fight and nearly getting herself killed.

She listened to the heated chastisement largely in silence, aware that she had defied a direct order from him by jumping in. She refused to apologize, though, as she did not regret in the least having done it. If he needed her she was going to be there. Eventually he would simply have to accept that.

They reached the Chūwain before he could finish explaining to her fully the depths of her lunacy, but he shot her a look that promised it was not over. Kagome rolled her eyes covertly, following Midoriko's lead as she guided them to a remote wing of the Chūwain that she explained was both spacious and uninhabited.

She instructed the guards to escort Sesshoumaru inside, bowing slightly to the daiyoukai and promising that she would send in some of her disciples soon to tend his wounds and make the quarters more suitable for living. Sesshoumaru spared her a glance, but did not respond before he was led inside.

"Kagome," Midoriko said, turning to the younger woman. "This wing is rather sprawling. I will need to borrow some of your power to set up an adequate barrier over it to hold his Lordship. After that perhaps you might spare some time to explain how your presence in court has remained a secret to me entirely."

The latter statement was softened by a small smile, but Kagome flushed slightly. In all the mess she had forgotten entirely that no one knew that she had returned to court. It seemed things were to go right back to the fast-paced existence of court life.

"I only just returned last night, Midoriko-sama," Kagome said sheepishly.

"Do not worry. There will be time enough for explanations later, as I am sure there is much to be explained," Midoriko said gently, extending a hand to her. "For now we must make certain that his Lordship does not attempt any further rash actions."

Inuyasha snorted faintly at the gentle understatement and Kagome shot him a reproving look before extending her hand to Midoriko. The elder miko closed her eyes and Kagome followed her lead, focusing on guiding her energy into Midoriko.

The O-Miko was skilled enough that by utilizing her energy the barrier was formed in matter of moments. Even so, Kagome found herself slightly winded by the time she released her hand. She frowned. A faint frown lined Midoriko's brow as well as she turned to look at her, eyeing her thoughtfully.

"You're sure that will be enough to hold him?" Inuyasha said, frowning skeptically in the direction of the translucent barrier.

"I assure you, Tennō-sama, that the barrier will be more than enough to repel any youki," Midoriko responded. "If your Majesty wishes to visit with your Lord brother, however, Kagome or myself should be able to guide you through the barrier without issue."

Kagome could see Inuyasha's face twist in the beginning of a scoff at the thought of him ever actually choosing to visit Sesshoumaru, but the expression faded half-formed.

"I do want to talk to him," he said, and Kagome blinked in surprise. "I have a few questions I need to ask."

Midoriko nodded.

"I would imagine so, Tennō-sama," she said. "I will lead your Majesty through."

Inuyasha nodded. He turned to Kagome.

"You come, too," he said. "Better we do it now while he's still weak. Might actually get some answers out of him."

Kagome was not at all sure what he had in mind, but she nodded nonetheless. If he was going to be in the same room as his brother, better that she be there to act as a buffer. She felt a bit light-headed after the creation of the barrier, but it was slight enough to be ignored.

Midoriko stepped forward, lifting a hand and making two quick gestures that opened a hole in the barrier. She waved them through it, sealing the barrier fully once more behind them.

"I will wait here for you both, Tennō-sama," Midoriko said, bowing. "I am certain that whatever your Majesty has to say to your Lord brother is better said in private."

Inuyasha nodded and turned to enter the wing, Kagome trailing after him. The guards had taken Sesshoumaru into one of the larger rooms of the wing, making him as comfortable as possible there in the sparsely furnished room before taking their leave. They found him there now, making an obvious effort to look like he was not relying on the wall behind him for support in remaining upright. His slightly unfocused gaze was on the place where once his left arm had been. There remained now only a stump covered in rapidly congealing blood.

Kagome could not help but wince in sympathy, her eyes truly focusing on the sight for this first time since the battle. Youkai, daiyoukai especially, were amazingly resilient, but from what she could recall most of them did not possess regenerative powers. That arm would not be coming back.

His gaze shifted to them as Kagome slid the shoji closed behind them, his expression hardening. He did not speak.

"I have some questions," Inuyasha began.

Sesshoumaru arched one silver brow, his eyes shifting from Inuyasha to Kagome. He was definitely weakened from the battle, Kagome noted. He disguised it well, but it seemed to be all that he could do to maintain consciousness after the wounds he had sustained.

"And you needed your whore present once more to do your work for you, half-breed?" he returned flatly. "Or perhaps not yet, by the smell of her. Too weak even to stake your claim on a human, mongrel? Careful. There are those who will not hesitate to take the things you are too weak to keep."

His glance sharpened on Kagome for a moment before shifting in challenge to Inuyasha. For all that she realized immediately that the words were nothing more than an attempt to rile the hanyou, Kagome could not help but flush in a mixture of anger and mortification as she caught the implication.

The veiled threat was not lost on Inuyasha, either. He started forward, hand moving instinctively to Tessaiga's hilt. Kagome caught his arm, holding him back.

"The Tennō-sama has already more than proven who the weak one is here," she said as coolly as she could manage. "You would do well to admit your defeat gracefully, Sesshoumaru-sama, and to answer his Majesty's questions."

"And you would do well to learn your place, human," Sesshoumaru said, the edges of his mouth curling down in distaste. "Lest you force this Sesshoumaru to teach it to you."

Inuyasha shifted, his larger frame blocking Kagome entirely from the daiyoukai's view. He flicked one thumb upward, loosening the sword from its scabbard meaningfully.

"You're hardly in a position to be making threats, you asshole," Inuyasha snapped. "Now answer me. Who brought word to the Chinese court of what was happening here?"

Kagome blinked at the hanyou's back, surprised. The thought had not occurred to her, but it made sense. Or rather, it did not make sense. Inuyasha had informed her some time ago that all relations with China had largely fallen through upon the death of his father. The Emperor there, upon learning that it was a hanyou who was to inherit the throne, had severed all ties with Japan and withdrawn all of the Chinese diplomats residing in the court.

Why, then, would news have travelled so far as the Chinese court about what Inuyasha had done?

Sesshoumaru's frown deepened, a scoff escaping him. More than anything else the unrefined sound betrayed his fatigue.

"Word of your utter degradation of the lineage of the Tennō?" he said. "What, half-breed? Had you hoped to keep your shame entirely confined to one continent?"

"Who was it, Sesshoumaru?" Inuyasha pressed impatiently. Kagome peered around him, intent on the answer.

"The Korean diplomat you were keeping here in the court," Sesshoumaru answered. "He brought word of it with him to the Chinese Emperor on his visit to the court. He thought it necessary that the Chinese Emperor be aware of such goings on."

Inuyasha shot a glance over his shoulder, exchanging a look with Kagome. They shared the same thought in that moment.

There had been no Korean diplomat in the court.

"What was his name?" Kagome pressed. "What did he look like?"

Sesshoumaru looked at her in silence for several moments. At last his gaze slid away from her dismissively. It seemed he was done answering questions.

Inuyasha frowned, but shook his head. He turned to Kagome.

"It doesn't matter," he said. "More likely than not the name was a fake. I doubt a description will help much either. I've got all I need."

Silently Kagome conceded this, frowning. Inuyasha moved toward the shoji, pausing just before he opened it.

"Much as I'd like to just toss you out of the court on your ass, I have a feeling you'd just come back whining about something again sooner or later," he said without bothering to turn around. "So until I decide what to do, you're confined here. And I meant what I said out there. Try anything again and I'll kill you without blinking."

Sesshoumaru did not respond. They exited the room.

"What do you think it means?" Kagome said, hurrying after him.

"I don't know," Inuyasha said, brow furrowed.

She could almost see his mind working furiously behind his eyes, searching for any sort of explanation. Her own mind was racing, trying to sort through it.

"There has to be some-"

She cut herself off as they came upon Midoriko, waiting along the edge of the barrier to escort them back out.

"You are finished already, Tennō-sama?" she asked.

He nodded curtly, his thoughts elsewhere. She bowed, turning and making the same gesture as before to open a part of the barrier. They all passed through and she sealed it once more.

Kagome made to follow Inuyasha back to the Dairi, anxious to discuss with him what they had just heard. Midoriko caught her eye, though, and she hesitated.

"Tennō-sama," she said, catching Inuyasha's attention. "I am going to remain here with Midoriko-sama for a bit, if it pleases his Majesty."

For a moment Inuyasha looked as if he might protest, but he nodded.

"Fine," he said. "Come to the Dairi when you have finished here."

Kagome bowed in acknowledgement and Inuyasha moved off quickly. She looked after him for a moment, hoping he did not take it into his head to do anything rash.

"You still look a bit pale," Midoriko said, recalling her attention. "Come. Perhaps some tea will bring your color back."

The elder miko led her to the main sitting room of the Chūwain, ordering one of the passing disciples of the temple to prepare tea and bring it to them along the way. Kagome was glad to sit down at the low table there, that slight dizziness surfacing once more now that she had a moment to think.

She raised her eyes to find Midoriko watching her from across the table, a faint frown deepening the lines around her eyes and mouth. Kagome blinked, bowing her head and folding her hands together in her lap.

"I apologize again, Midoriko-sama," she said. "Truly I only returned to the court last night. None of the courtiers are aware as of yet of my return-well, no, perhaps after what just transpired, but-"

"Never mind that for the moment," Midoriko said, cutting her rambling explanation short. "Let me see your hand once more, child."

Midoriko extended her hand across the table, palm face up. Kagome's eyes moved from her face to the outstretched hand, uncertain. She placed her hand within Midoriko's own.

The O-Miko's eyes slid closed, and Kagome experienced the ever-strange sensation of a foreign energy sliding up through her arm. It took an effort to keep from squirming as Midoriko's energy curled throughout her body, sliding just beneath her skin like cold fire. Eventually Midoriko's eyes slid open once more, the sensation dissipating immediately.

Midoriko's frown, however, only deepened further.

"Is something the matter, Midoriko-sama?" Kagome ventured after the woman failed to speak for several moments.

"The creation of the barrier just now," Midoriko said, gesturing vaguely towards the wing where Sesshoumaru was now confined. "I sensed something…strange in you as we worked. Nor should such a small feat have tired you to this degree. Surely you must feel it, as well."

Kagome blinked, a slight frown drawing her brows together. She did feel a bit more tired than she ought to after such a small task, perhaps. But she had been traveling for nearly a week with Inuyasha. Last night was the first decent rest she had gotten in some time. And to be woken by such a mess…surely it was not so strange that she felt tired, was it?

"The Shikon," Midoriko spoke softly, recalling her attention. "I do not believe…It is hard to know for certain, but I do not believe it was meant to be housed inside a human for such an extended amount of time. And you use it sometimes, do you not? You draw on its energy?"

"Well, I…" Kagome faltered. "I do, though I rarely ever mean to. It is more like…well, it just comes out sometimes. When I am cornered, or exhausted…"

"It utilizes you to protect itself, you mean," Midoriko said thoughtfully. "As long as it remains within your body, it remains pure. It protects its purity by protecting you, its vessel. But the sort of power that the Shikon possesses is not meant to be utilized directly by human beings."

Midoriko met her gaze directly, her look grim. Kagome experienced something like the slide of cold fingers down the length of her spine.

"The energy in your body is much weaker than when we first met," Midoriko said softly. "The Shikon…I can sense its energy much more clearly than your own. It seems to be attempting to consume you. To take you into itself. I fear it is beginning to put a great strain on your body, possibly a deeply harmful one."

A loud silence followed. Kagome frowned, hearing the words but not quite able to process the thought.

"What?" she managed inelegantly at last.

"The Shikon's power is beginning to exhaust your body," Midoriko said, as gently as she could manage. "Those times when you have used it and then been left exhausted for days afterwards, those are indications of it, though I had hoped that they were not. It is difficult to say how much damage has been done, but…"

The O-Miko trailed off, her eyes fixed on Kagome's face. Kagome frowned, her lips working several times before she could get any words out.

"So…carrying the Shikon no Tama is shortening my life?"

Midoriko hesitated for a long moment before nodding.

"Possibly," she admitted, eyes downcast. "Though perhaps if you rest for some time or go into seclusion to allow your body some time to recover…"

She trailed off. Kagome did not look at her, but heard clearly enough her uncertainty. There was no telling if time or rest would help. Besides, Kagome knew without having to consider it much that that was not an option for her.

"We could remove it," Midoriko offered after a beat. "We could take the Shikon from your body. I confess I am not certain what effect doing so would have, but we might at least prevent any further damage from being done."

Kagome had scarcely given thought to the suggestion before she found herself shaking her head. She was conscious of the horrible implications of what Midoriko was telling her, but she felt strangely detached.

"No," she said. "Kaede-sama placed her faith in me when she placed the Shikon no Tama inside of my body. It is mine to protect. I don't trust that I could keep it safe were we to remove it."

"Kagome…"

She could hear the faint pleading in the word and she understood the guilt behind it. In some ways Midoriko was responsible for this. Responsible for the fact that the Shikon no Tama was beginning to eat away at her. But she did not feel frightened or angry. No, there was a feeling of…of peace.

She raised her eyes to meet Midoriko's.

"Somehow…I never expected to live very long," she confessed, the words the only sort of absolution she could think to offer the woman.

Midoriko's eyes slid shut as if she had dealt her a blow. Kagome frowned.

"Midoriko-sama," she said softly. "I will try to refrain from using the Shikon's energy in the future. Surely you can help me train to do that and perhaps that will be the end of it. As you have already said, there is no telling how much damage has been done. Perhaps it is hardly anything at all and I truly am just tired today."

Midoriko blinked slowly, considering this. She nodded, though she did not look entirely convinced.

"I suppose," she said lowly. "It might not be anything at all. Perhaps I am merely misinterpreting what I have sensed. The ways of the Shikon are largely a mystery to me yet, after all."

"Yes," Kagome agreed, offering her a smile. "Precisely. And we can even start our training to keep me from using the Shikon any further in a few days' time, if it will put your mind at ease. For now, though, I must go to the Tennō-sama. I am afraid I have kept his Majesty waiting too long already."

She rose, bowing quickly to her mentor before turning to go. She heard Midoriko half-call to her as she went, but she did not turn around.

The shoji door slid shut on two words that were scarcely more than a whisper.

"I'm sorry."

* * *

Kagome walked for a stretch of time without thinking anything in particular. Her eyes were occupied with the sights around her, buildings and a few courtiers like brightly colored birds flitting here and there. Her feet carried her automatically along the familiar route to the Dairi, twisting and turning along the walls of residences and through open gardens.

Slowly her mind began to turn once more.

She had lied to Midoriko. More than once, she realized now.

The more innocuous of her lies had been her excuse for cutting their conversation so short. While she was impatient to speak with Inuyasha as soon as possible, their conversation had hardly lasted long enough to try the hanyou's patience. She had not even begun to explain her return to the court to the elder miko.

She had simply needed to end the conversation. The pity and guilt she had seen in the other woman's face was not something she felt equal to dealing with at the moment.

It was the other lie, the much greater one, that chiefly occupied her thoughts now.

The Shikon was draining her life. She understood it with the kind of bone-deep certainty that was unshakeable. The number of times she had used its power to the point that she was forced to sleep for days afterwards simply to recover…she had always sensed vaguely during those times that something was wrong. That some irreparable damage had been done. It had been easy to dismiss that half-formed notion until now.

Perhaps removing the Shikon would keep further damage from being done. Perhaps not. Either way, she was not willing to remove it. It was hers to guard until the end. Nor could she afford to take time to rest now. Inuyasha needed her, and she would not simply abandon all the work she had put in in the court because she was feeling a bit tired.

She had concealed all of these thoughts from Midoriko. What good would it do anyone for her to feel guilt over what was happening? It was not something that anyone could have predicted.

Besides, Kagome found that she could say with complete honesty that she did not feel angry or upset over it. For most people it would have felt like something was being stolen from them, something precious snatched away. But even after coming to the court Kagome had never quite been able to get a clear picture of what a future for her would look like. There had been brief glimpses, small flights of fantasy, but in the end they had always dissolved into the indistinct and the unreal.

Perhaps it had merely been the kami's way of telling her that her life was not meant to be a long one.

There was no way of knowing how much time she had, though. For all she knew it could yet be years before the Shikon finished its work of draining her. If she was only beginning to feel the effects of it now, she might well have time.

Yes, as long as she could make certain that everything was settled in time, then she would be fine.

She blinked, realizing suddenly that she stood just before Inuyasha's chambers. The pair of guards there bowed to her, and she bowed quickly in return before pushing aside the doorway hanging to enter.

Inuyasha sat amidst the pile of cushions that dominated the center of the room, papers spread haphazardly out all around him. The desk he normally would have used was hopelessly shattered after the previous night's pummeling.

Kagome froze in the entryway, arrested by the sight.

Ah, there it was.

Because suddenly she could see Inuyasha and Shippou and Sango and Miroku. She could see her mother and her brother and her grandfather. She had not thought of them once. Some part of her had refused to.

But these people were her life. These were the things that were being stolen from her. A full life lived with these precious, precious people.

Inuyasha looked up, blanching at the sight of her. The expression struck her as comical and a small laugh escaped her, the sound choked by the tears she found streaming down her cheeks. She sniffled, reaching up to swipe at her eyes with the lengths of her sleeves, and cried harder.

"O-Oi, what happened?" Inuyasha said, at her side in an instant. "What the hell happened, Kagome?"

His hands came up, resting a bit uncertainly on her shoulders. She leaned forward until her forehead pressed against his chest, hiding her face as the feeling overwhelmed her completely.

"Kagome, what is it?" Inuyasha pressed when she failed to answer after several moments.

He attempted to push her back far enough to get a look at her face, but she wrapped her arms about him and clung tight. It was difficult to draw enough breath to speak and it took several more moments before she could muster a reply.

"My throat," she gasped pathetically, the only excuse she could come up with. "It hurts."

She pointed lamely to the bruises on her neck from Sesshoumaru's attempted strangulation, well aware that it was hardly something that would warrant this sort of reaction. A mystified silence followed her words.

"…What?"

Nonetheless his arms came around her, pressing her to his chest. Kagome's body shook with the force of the feeling.

He made a few more half-hearted attempts at getting her to explain what was wrong, but mostly he just held onto her.

Kagome cried, realizing perhaps for the first time how utterly precious a thing her life was.

* * *

Inuyasha eyed her warily. Kagome kept her gaze purposefully averted, wiping the last remnants of tears from her now thoroughly swollen eyes.

She had finally managed to calm down enough to let him go and now they sat facing one another on the cushions. She was well aware that he did not believe for a second her professed reason for what had rapidly spiraled into a complete breakdown. Still she said nothing.

She had no intention of telling him what Midoriko had told her. He had enough to concern himself with without taking up her problems, as well. Besides, what good would his knowing do anyway? There was little that could be done either way.

Yes, better that they both focus on more important matters.

"The Korean diplomat," she began, clearing the last of the roughness from her throat. "What do you think it means?"

Inuyasha quirked one incredulous brow.

"You're seriously not going to tell me what happened?" he said. "You come in here bawling your eyes out and you won't say a word?"

Kagome's eyes dropped to her lap. She shrugged with affected unconcern.

"I already told you," she said. "My throat hurts. I am more than a bit tired and I woke only to watch you nearly be killed and then to nearly be killed myself. Am I not allowed to cry every now and again?"

Inuyasha blinked, caught off guard by this line of defense.

"It's not…allowed or not," he fumbled. "Just…you usually don't. Not over stupid stuff."

"Well, excuse me for being stupid," Kagome huffed.

"I didn't…I mean…" Inuyasha said, losing track of his own argument entirely. "Shit. Fine. Let's just talk about the Korean diplomat already."

Inwardly Kagome grinned.

"Well, we already know that the diplomat was a fake," Kagome said. "There have not been any foreign diplomats to the court since…"

"Since my old man died," Inuyasha supplied for her. "Yeah, they pretty much cut ties when everything started falling apart. Still, fake or whatever, the person knew what was happening here in the court. So either they were here or they're in contact with someone who is."

"They couldn't have been here," Kagome pointed out. "You tore down the screen after passing the ban on residence visits. One per year. No courtier has left the court since then, right?"

Inuyasha nodded, considering this.

"Yeah," he said. "You're right. No one's left since then, except…So it'd have to be someone in contact with one of the courtiers here. Someone in the court made sure to let them know, whoever it was."

"Then the question is why," Kagome said.

"I can think of a couple reasons," Inuyasha said. "One of them is here in the court already. Sesshoumaru never made any secret about what he thought of me and my old man's decision to put me on the throne, though the bastard was so butthurt about it that he walked away without a fight. Anyone who knew that much woulda known that news would be enough to light a fire under Sesshoumaru's ass."

"I see," Kagome said. "Then their aim would have been to get Sesshoumaru to return, so that he would challenge you for the throne. That would make sense. There are several clans that I know would sooner see a full youkai on the throne and who supported Sesshoumaru during the throne war. But what of the second reason?"

Inuyasha shrugged.

"Sesshoumaru might not have been a factor at all," he said. "Could be that he just happened to be there and it set him off. The Chinese Emperor is an even bigger fish, after all. And news like this…well, the Chinese Emperor was opposed to me taking the throne in the first place. It wouldn't surprise me if this were the thing that turned him against me entirely."

Kagome's eyes widened.

"You don't mean you think that the Chinese Emperor would actually move against you?" she said.

Inuyasha shrugged, shaking his head.

"Dunno," he replied, lips set in a grim line. "Though I can't say it'd surprise me too much. His army is stronger than mine, that's for sure. It all comes down to whether or not he's willing to risk a war over it."

Kagome frowned, absently beginning to worry her lower lip with her teeth.

"Then…" she said slowly, turning it over in her head. "We need to send someone, a diplomat of our own, to the Chinese court. If we can get the Chinese Emperor to hear the good you have been doing, perhaps he will reconsider. We just need someone to go and speak on your behalf, to convince the Emperor that war would be too costly and unnecessary to both sides."

But Inuyasha was shaking his head.

"Even a youkai making the trip would take months to get there," he said. "It'd take too long. Besides, there's no knowing if the Emperor would even accept a diplomat coming from my court. More likely he'd just turn them away. Or kill them, if he was really set on getting a war started."

"Then what?" Kagome asked, eyes searching his face. "There must be something we can do."

"Fortify our defenses along the western coastline," Inuyasha answered. "That's where he'll come from, if he decides to come. And his army might be stronger, but from what I remember his ships weren't much compared to ours. With advance warning like this, we might stand a chance of fighting him off."

Kagome frowned.

"Do you really think we can afford to go to war now?" she said. "We haven't even begun to solidify ties with the villages. And the situation here in the court…"

She trailed off, feeling a bit exhausted at the thought. Inuyasha shook his head.

"Look, don't worry about it," he said. "You just focus on things here in the court. I'll handle the rest. Besides, war mobilization isn't something that happens all at once. We've got a few months at least before anything happens."

Kagome looked up at him, nodding slowly. She released a breath.

"Yes," she said softly, more to herself than to him. "I suppose you're right. I will keep it in mind, though. Perhaps given some time I can think of…well, something…"

Inuyasha shot her a dark look.

"I'm serious, Kagome," he said. "I didn't drag you all the way back here just so you could kill yourself worrying about shit. I'll handle this one, alright?"

Kagome blinked at him, a sharp tug resounding inside of her.

I might be dying anyway.

The words welled up in her throat, clamoring almost with a life of their own to be spoken. She wanted to tell him so badly that she thought she might actually choke on the words if she did not speak them. Wanted him to hold her and comfort her and promise to protect her.

"Can I sleep here tonight?" she found herself saying instead.

"Yeah," he replied almost instantly, then blinked as if he had had no control over the word escaping him.

Kagome smiled faintly. There was no part of her that doubted the impropriety of continuing to do this with him, but she found suddenly that she did not care as much as she once had. Surely the kami could allow her a few small indulgences.

"Thanks," she said softly. He flushed faintly, eyes sliding away from hers.

"I…keh."

Kagome rose, smiling faintly.

"Then I will return early this evening," she said.

Inuyasha blinked up at her, embarrassment fading.

"Where are you going?" he asked, a slight frown tugging at the corners of his lips.

"There is just some research I would like to do before my official return is announced to the court tomorrow," Kagome replied, careful to keep her response vague.

"Research?" Inuyasha echoed.

"One of my companions on my mission," she replied. "There is something I want to look into for him, as he is not yet able to return to court."

The faint frown did not dissipate, but the hanyou nodded.

"Alright," he said. "There's some stuff I've gotta take care of with the Council anyway. Just…don't overdo it, alright? You just got back. Nobody could blame you if you wanted to rest."

Kagome smiled slightly, though she kept her eyes carefully averted. There was a bitter tinge to the expression that she could feel but not erase, and she did not wish for him to see it.

"No," she said. "It's alright. There will be plenty of time for me to rest once everything is over."

* * *

Kagome was thankful for the fact that Inuyasha had not pressed her further about her intended errand. He certainly would not have approved.

Nor would Miroku, for that matter. Still, she was unwilling to merely let things be until he returned. After all that he had done for her since they had first met, the least she could do was to try and look into the matter for him.

She also could not ignore the fact that the spider was in some way involved in what had happened to his father. Inuyasha's father, Miroku's father, her village, the little boy here in the court, Kohaku…she had run across the spider far too many times for it all to be mere coincidence, but as of yet it all still seemed so random. Perhaps investigation into what had befallen Miroku's father would help begin to put the pieces together.

In the time it had taken her and Inuyasha to get back to the court, she had considered several times how to approach the matter upon her return. The only clue they really had was the fan that pointed to the Taira clan, but that itself was problematic. The Taira would never speak willingly to her and the one way of she had had of learning about what went on within the clan was no longer available to her.

She would need, then, another way of inquiring about them without them becoming aware that she was doing so. It had taken some consideration, but at last she had managed to come up with her current plan of action.

She reached the former Chūgū's residence, not surprised to find it unguarded. It was for the best, really. The less people who saw her coming and going, the better. Likely the only ones inside the residence would be herself and the servants assigned to maintain the grounds until she returned, which suited her purposes just fine.

She passed through the outer gates and let herself in through the main entryway, walking some time before she found anyone. In a small side hall she at last came across a pair of servants, standing and chatting together idly. They paused as she rounded the corner, the eyes of the woman who had a clearer view of her widening.

"Miko-sama," she said, bowing hurriedly. The man beside her turned, mimicking the motion as soon as he caught sight of her.

"Miko-sama," he said. "My apologies. We hadn't received any word of your return. The residence is in no state to be inhabited at the moment, but if you will but give us a little time we can clear out at least a few rooms for you. My apologies again."

"Please, do not concern yourselves over it," Kagome said, gesturing for them to rise. "I've only just returned. I know no word was sent. I only came seeking Chūsei-san. I need to speak with her, if you know where she might be found."

The woman nodded.

"I believe she's out in the gardens," she said. "Show Miko-sama to the eastern tea room. It's cleanest, I think."

The latter was directed to the man and he nodded. Bowing once more, he gestured for Kagome to follow him as the woman started off towards the gardens.

The man led her to the eastern tea room, sparsely furnished and slightly musty from having been shut up during her absence. The tatami were clean enough, though, and after fetching a pair of cushions the man opened the outer shoji to let the room air out. The day was warm enough for the room to be quite comfortable even with the shoji sitting open, and the man went to fetch tea and a light meal.

Several moments passed before the inner shoji slid open once more, this time to reveal Chūsei. The woman beamed at the sight of her, and Kagome felt an answering smile stretch across her face. She rose as Chūsei moved forward and they met in an embrace in the middle.

"Look at you," Chūsei murmured chidingly against her hair, her voice thick with feeling. "A few months away and you've grown so thin! Didn't I always warn you about eating properly? Didn't I always say that-"

"A good day is built upon a good meal," Kagome finished for her, quite familiar with the phrase after the time she had spent in confinement with Chūsei as virtually her only companion. "Yes, I remember."

"Obviously not well enough to actually follow it," Chūsei huffed, though without any real heat.

The older woman pulled back enough to examine her face, her smile fading a bit.

"You look tired," she commented softly.

Kagome could not help but smile, warmed by the mothering air the woman exuded. She shrugged.

"I am tired," she admitted. "But there's no use in worrying over it. I will rest once everything is done."

Chūsei frowned.

"The problem there is," she said. "With you, things are never done."

Silently Kagome conceded the point, her smile fading slightly. Chūsei sighed, squeezing her once more before gesturing for Kagome to resume her seat. She did, and Chūsei took up the cushion across from her.

"I'm glad to see you returned safely to court," Chūsei said. "I had heard rumors among the servants that you had been sighted this morning amidst the…well, amidst all that mess, but I figured that you would come to find me when you were ready."

Kagome nodded, pausing when the shoji slid open once more. The man from earlier bowed before entering, placing tea, tsukemono, and rice before them before exiting once more.

Chūsei glanced from the food to Kagome, giving the younger woman a pointed look. Kagome took up her hashi obligingly, wondering if she really had lost all that much weight in the months she had been gone. She did not feel any thinner, but she had not exactly had much time to take account of her own body lately.

She ate enough to satisfy the woman before setting it aside, intent on getting back to her original purpose.

"If you were aware that I had returned, then I can assume that everything is still in place?" she said, assuming the vague manner of speaking that they used to refer to the network of servants under Chūsei's command.

Chūsei nodded, a tinge of pride turning up the corners of her mouth.

"Well in place," she answered. "And growing."

Kagome's brows rose.

"Growing?" she echoed. Chūsei nodded once more, Kagome's surprise seeming to please her even more.

"Did you think things in the court would stand still in your absence?" she teased gently. "The court continues to shift even without you here to prod at it. Don't worry, though. I've continued to report everything to his Majesty. Or I was, until…"

She trailed off, darting an uncertain look at Kagome. Kagome blinked, realizing she was alluding to Inuyasha's disappearance.

"What do you know, Chūsei-san?" she asked tentatively.

Chūsei shook her head.

"Not much," she replied. "Only that the Tennō-sama had withdrawn entirely from court life since his Majesty's wedding, this morning being the first time that his Majesty has emerged in over two weeks. Supposedly the reason for his Majesty's withdrawal was to allow for time with the Empress to enjoy their new marriage. I know that reason to be false, though."

She hesitated, glancing about to make certain that no one was around to overhear them.

"It's her Majesty," Chūsei said at last, frowning and keeping her voice low as an extra precaution. "She's left the court. She left only two days after the wedding ceremony. Who'd have thought a marriage could encounter such trouble as that so quickly? Worse yet, if no heir comes of those first few nights, the marriage will become void and his Majesty will have to seek another wife to produce an heir, or at least take a concubine. There can't be any stability here in the court until the Tennō-sama produces an heir, after all-"

"Wait," Kagome said, holding up a hand to halt the rapid flow of information. "Please, wait just a moment. You know of Kik-…you know of Fujiwara-sama's departure? The servants know of it?"

Chūsei blinked, surprised herself.

"You know of it, Miko-sama?" she asked.

"I…spoke to his Majesty upon my return," she fibbed, eyes sliding away from the older woman's. "The Tennō-sama informed me of it. But what of you, Chūsei-san? How did you learn of it?"

"The same way I learn of everything else," Chūsei replied. "The servants. Her Majesty took several with her upon departing. Word of something like that spreads like wildfire among us. It would've been impossible to keep it entirely secret, though I hear a guard tried to keep the servants who had witnessed it quiet."

Kagome frowned, a sinking feeling growing in the pit of her stomach. For all his efforts, Akitoki-sama had been unable to keep everything from getting out.

"There's no need to worry, Miko-sama," Chūsei said, seeing the dismay growing on her face. "The word did spread a bit among the servants within the Dairi, but I made certain to put a stop to it as soon as word reached me. I knew it wouldn't be any good for his Majesty if it got out, and besides the Tennō-sama doesn't deserve to have everyone prying into his Majesty's marriage. I promise you that none of the courtiers are any the wiser as to what's gone on."

Chūsei offered her a small reassuring smile. Kagome breathed a sigh of relief, the tension in her stomach easing. Of course Akitoki-sama would have been unable to control the servants. For all that they were there to serve the courtiers, Kagome knew well enough that they really only listened to their own when it came to matters such as this. Thus it seemed that Chūsei, too, had played a vital role in keeping the court orderly despite all that had happened.

"Thank you," she said, well aware of how inadequate the words were. "You did his Majesty a great service."

Chūsei smiled, shaking her head.

"For all that the Tennō-sama's not exactly the…friendliest person, I've found that I quite like his Majesty," she said. "I'm glad to have been of help."

"What you said about an heir, though," Kagome said, recalling the other thing that had caught her attention. "What do you mean? Could the marriage truly become void?"

At one time the thought might have brought her an entirely selfish sort of relief. At the moment, though, it disturbed her. Inuyasha's marriage was a barrier of sorts. She had resolved to stay by Inuyasha's side, to be with him without ever being with him. The marriage made such a resolve much simpler. It was easy not to expect anything from a man who had already promised himself to another woman. If the marriage were dissolved, though, not only would Kikyou likely be further devastated, but she…

"Well, the marriages of the Tennō-sama are largely for the sake of producing an heir to secure the throne," Chūsei said, cutting across her thoughts. "You've seen for yourself the chaos that can happen when succession doesn't go as planned. That's why the Tennō-sama often takes a wife and multiple concubines, to assure that at least one of the women will produce a son to carry the throne. Since that's the case, an official wife that can't produce a child…well, it wouldn't be the first time that a marriage was voided."

Kagome frowned, considering this. She realized she had no idea exactly how long after the wedding ceremony Inuyasha had left the court. She did not know if there had been enough time for them to…she flushed at the thought. And she certainly was not going to ask Inuyasha about it.

No, they would simply have to make sure that Kikyou returned to court soon. It was obviously important that an heir be produced for the sake of the court's stability and…she stopped the line of her own thoughts. That was one reality she would wait to deal with until it was before her.

"I understand," said Kagome. "There is no need to worry, though. Fujiwara-sama simply needs some time to sort through her own thoughts, I am certain. She will return soon enough and I am sure that an heir will follow not long after."

She avoided Chūsei's eyes as she spoke the last words, afraid of what the older woman might see there. Chūsei nodded.

"It's good to hear," she said. "I'll confess to having been more than a bit concerned when I learned what had happened. It's understandable, though. Her Majesty must be under a great deal of pressure."

Silently Kagome reflected that Chūsei did not know even the half of it. She prayed she was right, though, and that time and a bit of persuasion would bring Kikyou back to the court sooner rather than later.

"I came to you for another reason," Kagome said, recalling once more her original purpose in seeking Chūsei out. "I have a very important request to make of you, if you are willing."

Chūsei nodded to indicate that she was listening.

"It is a rather delicate matter, and it will require a great deal of secrecy on your part and the part of anyone you might enlist to help you," Kagome explained. "But I trust that if there is anyone in the court capable of it, it is you. To put it bluntly, I need you to look into the Taira clan for me."

Chūsei's brows rose incredulously.

"The Taira?" she repeated. "I don't know if that's possible. A great deal of progress has been made since your departure in getting access to servants of clans that used to ally with the Taira, but as of yet I've not been able to get a single servant from the Taira clan to speak to me. I'm afraid to press too hard lest they discover what I'm up to."

Kagome nodded.

"I assumed as much," she said. "The information I need is specific enough and does not need to come from the Taira themselves. Even just witnesses would be sufficient. You see, there was a woman named Fuyumi. She was a villager like myself, but I have reason to believe that she was brought here to the court for some time to live among the Taira as a mistress. I need to know what happened to her here, every last detail that can be found."

"I thought you could ask around to servants who serve under clans that have close ties to the Taira. Anyone who remembers anything about her would be a great help. Also, any inquiries that could be subtly made to those clan members who might know something would be good. I am not too concerned about the other clans, but above all else the Taira must not know that I or anyone else is inquiring. Do you think it would be possible? You are certainly free to refuse me if the request concerns you at all."

Chūsei's brow was furrowed slightly in thought.

"I'm not particularly concerned," she said slowly. "After all, it doesn't sound much more dangerous than what we've already done. I'm more curious than anything, I suppose. Who's this Fuyumi woman? What's so important about her? If you're merely curious about the practice of nobles taking those of common birth as mistresses, then I can tell you it's more common than you might think. The nobles tend to treat common women, servants included, more like property than people, though usually they at least maintain a semblance of propriety by keeping them at their outside residences."

Kagome blinked, storing this little piece of information away for consideration at a later date. To Chūsei she shook her head.

"It's not that that I am interested in," she replied. "And as to who Fuyumi was…well, I suppose I do not know much more about her than what I have already told you. As to why she is important, I cannot say that I am certain of that, either. It is part of what I am hoping to find out, really. What I do know is that she was somehow involved in the death of the father of one of my closest friends."

Kagome did not think it wise to reveal much more than that. Asking Chūsei to collect information about this woman was one thing, but revealing to her anything about the spider would involve her more deeply than Kagome was willing to risk. The less she knew, the safer she would be. It would simply be up to Kagome to put all of the pieces together once she knew more about Fuyumi.

Chūsei's expression sobered.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to pry into uncomfortable matters. I'm more than willing to be of help, if I can. It shouldn't be too difficult to find some servants of the clan houses with close connections to the Taira to speak with. Getting any information out of the courtiers themselves might be difficult, but I'll make sure that my people know to be as quiet about it as they can."

Kagome nodded, smiling.

"Thank you, Chūsei," she said. "Truly, and for everything. The work you have been doing is invaluable to the Tennō-sama and myself."

Chūsei grinned, lowering her gaze modestly.

"Just so long as you know it," she joked, shooting Kagome a playful glance. "Besides, we're all glad to do it. To feel as if we're part of something important. So long as his Majesty and yourself don't forget us, the servants are happy to be your eyes and ears for as long as you need us."

Kagome's smile widened and she reached out a hand to the older woman. Chūsei clasped it in return, pressing her palm.

For the first time in days Kagome felt the lightness of relief. Akitoki, Chūsei, the servants…alone she would have been powerless. But she was not alone. Even if her body gave out, they would be there to carry her. She was not alone.

* * *

Kagome returned to the Dairi and Inuyasha's chambers after she finished with Chūsei. They had spent some time merely catching up, Kagome sharing with the woman what she had been up to while outside of the court and Chūsei giving her a condensed version of what she had been reporting to Inuyasha in her absence.

Kagome trusted the woman enough to tell her about what she had been doing with the villages, and she was pleased to see her faith rewarded when the woman positively lit up at the news. Chūsei had been brought into the court as a servant when she was young, but a great number of her family members still lived outside in the villages.

Thus by the time they were finished talking night had begun to set it. It was late by the time Kagome reached Inuyasha's chambers, though she found them to be empty. Thankfully that meant that there was no guard there to see her enter at what might well be considered an indecently late hour. She made a mental note to be more careful about such considerations in the future, but then realized that such a mental note implied the occurrence of such events in the future. She decided not to think about it.

She lit a couple of lanterns to illuminate the dark chamber, wondering if she should wait up for Inuyasha to return. After a bit she decided she would simply go to sleep. She was rather tired, and the more time she sat up by herself in the room the more her thoughts attempted to stray towards things she had made up her mind not to dwell on. Now that he had announced the court meeting for the following day, she knew that she would at least have one more day with him to discuss a strategy before he set out after Kikyou.

It was a bit presumptuous, but she decided to use Inuyasha's futon once more. It was the most comfortable option, after all, and he had said himself last night that he was willing to use the cushions to sleep on. Surely he would not mind surrendering it for one night more.

Normally she would have changed into a light yukata to sleep in, but there were none available to her in Inuyasha's chambers. Instead she simply stripped down to her haori, folding her hakama and setting them out beside the futon. They were too dirty for her to sleep in them comfortably, and the haori was long enough that it was no real compromise to her modesty save that it was not meant to be slept in.

Kagome lay down and was asleep within moments.

* * *

Some time later she half-woke to some shifting on the futon.

"Move over," a voice murmured.

Unthinkingly she complied, rolling a bit to one side. The warmth of another body settled in beside her and she wriggled closer to it. An arm was slung over her, pressing her close.

"How'd it go?" she asked, the words slurred heavily with sleep. She did not bother to open her eyes.

"Keh," he huffed. "How d'you think? The angry old bastards are still angry and old. Sleep."

Kagome made a vague noise of assent, already sinking quickly back into the depths of slumber.

A small part of her realized as she drifted off that it should not have felt so natural. It should not have been so comfortable to lay at his side and go to sleep with the low thrum of his pulse against her ear where it was pressed to his chest. This should not have been her place.

But it was.

* * *

Kagome woke first the following morning, surprised to find Inuyasha still sound asleep beside her. Usually he required much less sleep than she did, but perhaps the return journey to the court had taken more out of him than he had let on.

She lay still for several moments, reluctant to move and risk waking him. Her legs had become tangled with is at some point during the night, his arm slung around her shoulder and her hand tucked beneath his side for warmth. His face, relaxed and almost childlike in sleep, was a hand’s breadth above her own.

Kagome reached out tentatively with her free hand, hesitating a moment before tracing her fingertips lightly over his cheekbone and the sharp ridge of his nose. His eyelashes, darker and longer than her own, fluttered at the contact, but he otherwise did not stir. He was utterly relaxed, and her heart swelled in her chest at the sight.

She realized she had never really looked at him so closely before. The hard-lined symmetry of his face, the dark line of his brow, the surprising softness of his skin…was it possible for anyone to look like that? It seemed almost unfair.

If moments such as these were her reward, though, Kagome felt that she could live without regret.

Her hand drifted upward, gently pushing back some of the hair that had slipped over his face in his sleep. Inuyasha stirred further at the contact, the hand on her back reflexively pressing her closer to his body.

Kagome blinked.

Something was pressing against her lower stomach. Inuyasha's hips flexed, pressing against her more firmly. Her face flamed.

Her experience in healing had allowed her too thorough a knowledge of living bodies for her to mistake what was going on.

Slowly she tilted her head, looking up into Inuyasha's face once more. To her surprise she met half-lidded golden eyes, still hazy with sleep. At most she guessed he was half-awake.

As her eyes met his he shifted, his body turning and their tangled legs bringing her with him. He was over her then, his warm weight pressed fully against her. His face was in the crook of her neck, breath warm against the point where her throat met her shoulder. Slowly he flexed his hips once more, hardness pressing into the cradle of her hips. A shudder ran through Kagome, and she was uncomfortably aware of her the heaviness of her breasts even through the bindings on her chest.

Her mind had gone entirely blank, but she followed the first notion that occurred to her.

She shoved Inuyasha and rolled off of the futon.

Her heart was pounding in her ears, but she could still hear Inuyasha's sleepy curse as he was brought abruptly to full consciousness. She glanced over at him, pressing a hand to her chest as if it would calm the erratic hammering of her heart. Her skin felt uncomfortably sensitive all over.

He blinked at her, the last traces of sleep slowly clearing from his expression. For a moment, though, she could see it there in his face-pupils wide and dark, eyes hooded as they trailed over the length of her. After a moment he flushed faintly, eyes darting away. Kagome folded her hands tightly in her lap, eyes fixed on them as she attempted to focus on anything other than the low thrum she could still feel humming through her body.

"Sorry," she murmured, unable to lift her gaze. "You were crushing me a bit."

"Oh," he replied dumbly.

Several moments of silence passed.

"We should get ready for the court meeting," Kagome said at last, managing to regain a semblance of composure. "It's set for this afternoon, isn't it?"

Inuyasha nodded and then, realizing she could not see him, said, "Yeah. I can call servants to help you get ready."

Kagome shook her head.

"I don't think that would be wise," she said, referring obliquely to the impropriety of their current arrangement.

"Oh," Inuyasha said, realizing it as well after a moment. "Yeah."

Another silent pause passed.

"I can go to the former Chūgū's residence to get ready," Kagome said after a beat. "There are servants there who will help me. I was wondering, though…what should we do about Fujiwara-sama? Her absence today isn't really something that we can conceal."

Kagome could almost feel him grow tense at the mention of the woman. A heaviness seemed to grow up between them, like a wall sliding into place. Kagome experienced a twinge, but ignored it determinedly. She had already indulged in enough foolishness for one morning.

Inuyasha shrugged, the gesture sharper than it should have been. He shook his head.

“I’ll come up with something,” he said, unable to meet her gaze. “And as soon as the meeting’s done we’ll figure out a way to to keep things together here while I go after her. I have to go get her. I can’t just leave her alone out there.”

The last was spoken almost as if in askance, a plea for some sort of understanding. Kagome’s eyes slid shut.

“I know,” she said. “I understand.”

A long moment of silence stretched between them. At last Kagome forced herself to stand, reaching for her hakama.

“Would you mind leading the guards away?” she said softly. “I should leave now if I am to be ready in time.”

Inuyasha nodded, though he did not speak. He stood, arranging his clothes for a moment before he went out without so much as a glance at her.

Kagome watched him go, her stomach sinking slightly.

* * *

It took hardly any time at all for Chūsei and a few of the other servants at the Chūgū's residence to help her get ready. They insisted on giving her a bath, pulling out the tub and scrubbing her down thoroughly. For once Kagome did not mind much. It had been some time since she had last been able to wash herself properly and it was nice to feel clean again.

Unfortunately they decided that, as this meeting would also serve to announce her return to the court, a juni-hito was in order. Chūsei was the one who insisted most strongly, and Kagome could not help but feel that the older woman got some sort of enjoyment out of treating her like a doll.

By the time that they had finished arranging her clothes, hair, and makeup, it was time for her to go to Daigokuden where the meeting was to take place. She bade the servants good-bye and started off, using the light parasol they had provided her to block the rays of the mid-morning sun.

Upon arrival she found that many of the courtiers were already present, hundreds of fans working to cool their owners inside the hall. Amidst a number of stares and murmurs Kagome took her place upon the dais, thankful that for once she was not required to wait until all the others were seated that she might be paraded before them. A quick glance showed her that the cushion that normally would have served as Kikyou's place was absent. She wondered how many of the others had already noticed it, as well.

Courtiers continued to pour in slowly until nearly every space was filled within the hall. Between all of the bodies packed into one space and the increasing warmth of the day outside, the hall was soon uncomfortably hot. Kagome prayed that the meeting would not take overly long, resisting the urge to tug at the neck of the juni-hito to loosen it.

At last she saw Inuyasha's frame fill the entryway, the room growing silent as he made his way to the dais. He had apparently decided that the occasion warranted more ceremony than usual, donning the kikuji no ho and the kanmuri as opposed to his usual garb. Kagome was pleased with the decision-in light of his brother's presence in the court every reminder of his own claim to the throne that could be mustered was good- though she sympathized deeply with the discomfort he must be feeling in this heat.

He took his place at the head of the dais, expression solemn, and all eyes were upon them. Kagome sat up straighter, schooling her own expression into a semblance of the regal passivity she remembered Kikyou often wearing at such events.

"Cousins," Inuyasha began, projecting loudly enough for his voice to carry throughout the room. "My thanks for your presence here today. I will begin with the reintroduction of one of our own back into the court."

He gestured to Kagome and she bowed her head slightly.

"The miko Kagome has recently returned to us from her mission outside of the court," Inuyasha continued. "The miko has worked hard for the sake of the court and has had great success in her mission. I extend to her my deepest thanks and welcome and wish for all of you to do the same, Cousins."

Almost as one the mass inclined its collective head, fans sweeping in a gesture of welcome. It was difficult to gauge the reaction of so many at once, but as far as Kagome could see there was no major discontent apparent at the news of her return.

She inclined her head in return, sweeping her fan in a gesture that she recalled indicated gratitude. She was not sure if this was the correct response, but she felt that some sort of gesture was needed.

"I am pleased to be among you once more," she said. "And thank you for welcoming me back into your midst."

Behind her Inuyasha nodded before turning his eyes out once more upon the crowd.

"Now, to address the main reason for our gathering here today," he said. "As most of you bore witness to yesterday morning, my…Lord brother has returned to the court from his studies in the Chinese court. He attempted yesterday to assert his own claim to the throne and to force me from it. I, however, am the rightful heir to the throne, as you are all well aware. My honored father willed it to me over my Lord brother. And if written word is not enough to satisfy you as to the legitimacy of my claim, yesterday I bested my Lord brother in battle with my honored father's sword."

Inuyasha rose, drawing Tessaiga deliberately from its sheathe. The sword transformed in a swirl of youki, and with a deft twist of his wrist Inuyasha planted the massive fang before him on the dais. His eyes swept the room in its entirety, and all activity ceased momentarily as the courtiers waited for him to continue.

"I currently hold my Lord brother in confinement, as punishment for his attempted coup," Inuyasha said. "By law I have a right to his life, if I wish it. I do not wish it. I do not believe that my honored father would wish for his…sons to be at odds. Thus I will continue to hold my Lord brother in confinement until he is prepared to repent and submit to my authority."

Inuyasha paused. Whispers had broken out in varying groups among the crowd, courtiers speaking and gesturing rapidly as they huddled together. Inuyasha allowed them a moment before speaking once more.

"If you have concerns, I will address them now. Speak your piece or we will be done with this matter forever."

A human man rose on the far right side of the room. Kagome frowned, struggling to recall the man's name or clan. She found that she could not, but the proximity of his clan to the Minamoto indicated that he might belong to one of the minor clans that associated with them.

"Hojo Yosuke," Inuyasha acknowledged him, confirming her guess. "Speak."

Hojo Yosuke bowed.

"I would merely like to say that we of the Hojo clan support your Majesty's decision," he said. "And we applaud your lenience in allowing your Lord brother to keep his life despite his transgressions. It is a true mark of your Majesty's humanity that you would spare your sibling's life even after he sought yours."

A man from the Minamoto whose name Kagome could not recall rose beside Hojo Yosuke.

"Minamoto Hiroaki," Inuyasha acknowledged him. "Speak."

"We of the Minamoto clan wish to echo the sentiments spoken by our cousins the Hojo," he said, bowing. "We support the Tennō-sama and her Majesty fully."

Kagome blinked, struggling to keep the surprise from her face. Certainly things had shifted in her absence if the Minamoto were now coming out fully in support of Inuyasha. Before she had left a few of the minor clans under them had slowly been coming over, but now it seemed that they were all entirely behind Inuyasha.

What had changed? Was it his marriage to Kikyou? She recalled vaguely the support the one Minamoto woman had shown towards Kikyou at the women's outing what felt like forever ago. Perhaps now that he was married to a human woman…and something about mercy and humanity that the man had just said…

But she did not have time to consider it further, a woman rising to stand on the far right side of the room as the men resumed their seats. She tucked these thoughts away for another time, focusing on the woman.

She was clearly a youkai of some sort, her floor-length hair an uncommon shade of auburn. Kagome was almost certain she had never seen her before, but her clan was ranged near the Taira in the hall. Kagome clasped her hands in her lap, squaring her shoulders in preparation for what she knew was to come.

"Abe Haruko," Inuyasha acknowledged her, and Kagome recalled from her talks with Sango that the Abe were definitely one of the minor clans beneath the Taira. "Speak."

The woman bowed.

"Tennō-sama," she said, her words slow and clear. "We of the Abe clan have discussed in depth yesterday's events. We find your Majesty's actions to be just. Your Majesty bested your Lord brother. The Tennō-sama has proven his Majesty's strength to be superior to even that of a daiyoukai. We of the Abe clan bow to your Majesty."

The woman bowed once more. Kagome blinked. Blinked again. She could not resist darting a glance back at Inuyasha, needing to see his reaction. He met her eyes, the faint bewilderment of his features mirroring her own.

Surely a member of one of the clans allied to his most vehement enemy in court had not just spoken in support of him. Surely they had both misheard.

But they had not.

In quick succession several more youkai courtiers rose from the Ō, Hashiji, and Ki clans to echo Abe Haruko's words. Inuyasha's strength in defeating his brother and sparing his life had won them over. He had proven himself more than equal to a daiyoukai and had defeated the man they secretly supported as the true heir to the throne.

Inuyasha had won them over.

By the time the courtiers were through Kagome was so stunned she could scarcely form a coherent thought. Almost in an instant everything seemed to have shifted.

She realized that, for the first time since she had come to court, Inuyasha might have more clans in support of his rule than opposed.

"Is there no one else who wishes to speak?" Inuyasha said after a beat of silence had passed since the last courtier had resumed their seat. She could hear the incredulity in his voice that was echoing loudly in her own mind. "I give you this last opportunity before I call the meeting to a close."

Unconsciously Kagome's eyes moved to the Taira, along with hundreds of other pairs in the room. They were all expecting it. If there was to be one dissenting voice…

But it never came. Kagome had the clearest view of Kagura, sitting stone-faced and silent among her clan. Not a one of them spoke. Not a fan among them so much as twitched.

"Then…I declare this meeting ended," Inuyasha said.

Kagome rose immediately, unable to contain herself. She turned to Inuyasha who quickly sheathed the Tessaiga and moved down a step towards her.

"What just-?"

"Can you believe-?"

"I don't even-"

Kagome was the first to hold up a hand, stemming the flow of their confused attempts to talk over one another. It would not do for them to act like that with so many people around.

"Meet me in the Dairi," she murmured. "We can discuss all of this there, alright?"

Inuyasha nodded. Kagome turned and started down the steps, making her way through the aisle of courtiers who were slowly rising from their places. Many were drifting into groups, chatting animatedly amongst themselves. Kagome caught sight of a few colorful fans, flipping and twisting in gestures of surprise and interest.

Obviously she and Inuyasha were not the only ones stunned by what had gone on.

Kagome was so distracted by the rapid turn of her own thoughts that she nearly ran straight into the guard standing directly in the entryway. She stumbled, only just managing to catch herself.

"My apologies," she said to the man. "I was not watching where I was going-"

"Miko-sama?" the guard spoke, interrupting her.

He looked down at her, his face a blank mask. He made no move to remove himself from her path.

"Yes?" Kagome said, feeling a strange prickle of apprehension.

"This is a message from Fujiwara-sama!"

He screamed loudly enough that the words echoed through the Daigokuden. Kagome scarcely had time to blink before she saw the gleam of the dagger, sliding out from where it had been concealed in his sleeve.

She stumbled backward, tripping on the hem of her robes and the height of her geta. The dagger arched down, and she felt it like a blow as it pierced her flesh.

Everything seemed to slow down and speed up all at once. Distantly she heard screaming and yells. Her vision swam in and out of focus, colors and faces blurring one moment and coming into sharp relief the next.

For a brief moment she saw Inuyasha over her, features strained and lips moving to form words she could not hear. She could see the sheen of tears pooling in his eyes. She tried to reach for him and found that she could not.

At last she slipped away.


	28. Of Death and Deliveries

"Do not stray far from her. If she dies you must be ready to take possession of the body immediately. I do not care if it means exposing yourself or others, so long as the corpse comes into my hands."

"And if she lives, Naraku-sama?" a voice answered, a faint hint of challenge in it. "What would you have me do then?"

The first party was silent for a beat, the hint of insolence in the response not missing its mark.

"Then you will proceed as I planned originally," the first voice replied, cooler than before. "That the guard got close enough to do even as much damage as he did only proves the idiocy of the girl. She thought herself safe enough in the court not to bother with a guard any longer. Needless to say the half-breed will see that she has one once more if she lives. Her death is the preferable outcome, but if she lives it will still be to my benefit."

"I see. Then I will tell Kanna to proceed as before and remain close in case she does pass."

"Mmmm," the first voice made a noncommittal sound of agreement.

Several moments of silence passed and it seemed the conversation might have reached a close.

"Then, Naraku-sama, I will-"

"Kagura?" the first voice interrupted.

"…Yes, Naraku-sama?"

There was a short pause, then a gasp. A pained yelp followed. The sound grew quickly into a scream, punctuated by gasping sobs. The sound seemed to stretch on forever.

"Consider this a reminder, Kagura," the first voice spoke when the noise died down to shuddering gasps. "Mind your mouth when you speak to me. You think I have not seen the pounding of this treacherous heart of late? You think I am ignorant of the cause of it? You would do well to remember that you are mine, Kagura, body and soul, until I see fit to release you. Otherwise you will only make things unpleasant for us both, and neither of us wants that, do we?"

Silence was the answer. The grin that stretched across the man's face was nearly audible.

"Good girl."

* * *

It was peaceful.

The glade was small, ringed closely by a dense mass of trees that grew so close together they seemed as one. A sea of grass grew high, swaying gently as if touched by a faint breeze. Here and there flowers stretched up above the grass, petals reaching towards the warmth of a sun that seemed to sit directly overhead in the sky.

She had no idea where this place was. She could not recall how she might have gotten here. She could not recall much of anything, for that matter, but she found that none of this troubled her in the least.

Kagome lay back, enjoying the gentle brush of the grass against her bare limbs. She glanced up at the tops of the stalks of grass and the flowers above her, feeling that she would be glad to let it swallow her.

The sun caught her eyes, blinding her for a moment. She blinked hard, bright spots dancing behind her closed lids.

The warmth on her face seemed to increase suddenly. She slanted her eyes open against the light.

A woman was there, leaning over her. She smiled, her skin as pale and as bright as sunlight. A strand of her long, dark hair slipped over her shoulder to brush Kagome's face. It was warm, the sensation akin to holding one's hands near the glowing embers of a fire.

"Hello, my daughter," the woman said, and Kagome knew her.

"Hello, Amaterasu-sama," she replied.

The kami's smile widened.

"I am glad to meet you at last," she spoke. "You have proven to be one of the more interesting ones to watch. Though the meeting has come sooner than I had thought it would."

"Am I passing, then?" Kagome asked, strangely untroubled by the thought.

The kami's head tilted slightly as she considered this.

"Possibly," she answered after a moment.

"Possibly?" Kagome echoed.

Amaterasu nodded.

"You are one of the rare ones, my daughter," she said. "The wound was not so grave as to be instantly fatal, but not so slight as to be easily mended. What happens from here will be a matter of choice."

"Wound?" Kagome said, a faint frown beginning to crease her brow.

"You cannot recall it?" Amaterasu asked. "You are further along than I suspected, then. Look at your hands, Kagome."

Kagome blinked slowly, uncomprehending for a moment. With great effort she managed to raise her hands, bringing them up between herself and the kami.

"Can you see them?" Amaterasu asked.

Kagome nodded, though it was not her hands to which the woman referred. It was the strings.

There was one attached to the second finger of her right hand, a bright red thread stretching off somewhere beyond the line of her sight. A second thread, black and thicker than the red one, was wrapped about her left wrist.

Even as she looked on she could see both threads beginning to fray.

"What's happening?" Kagome asked. "What are they?"

"I think that 'fate' is the word that I hear most of you throwing about," Amaterasu said, reaching down to run one slender finger along the length of the red thread. "But I do not think that quite fits. 'Bond' might be better. The connections you have to the world. The connections that tug at you, that might be woven into a future if not severed or unraveled."

She paused, eyes the color of molten amber shifting to the black thread. She considered it for a long moment.

"Another rarity," she murmured, reaching to pluck at it. "To have formed such a strong connection without either meaning to. This one will be hard to escape…"

"They're fraying," Kagome said, a thrill of panic running through her. She was tempted to pull her hands away from the kami to keep her from touching and damaging them any further.

"Yes," Amaterasu answered simply. "Eventually they will be broken entirely, if you so choose."

"And what happens then?" Kagome asked, turning her eyes to meet the woman's blazing gaze.

Amaterasu smiled. She shook her head.

"Nothing," she replied. "You stay here and you rest until the time comes when you can start anew. That is all. I can stay with you, if you like."

"But I will be dead?" Kagome asked.

"Yes."

"Isn't that…bad?"

"Is it?"

Kagome was not sure. There was some inkling in her mind that it should be, some faint instinct that dying was not something that was desirable. But her mind was largely blank. She could not come up with any logical reason to support the notion. All she knew for certain was that this place was comfortable and the fraying of the threads filled her with vague unease.

"I can't…Can't you tell me?" Kagome said, turning a pleading look on the kami. "You must know. Can't you tell me what I should do?"

But Amaterasu was already shaking her head.

"This choice has to be your own," she said. "Anything else would be meaningless."

Kagome frowned, eyes sliding down to her hands. She could not think. Her mind was empty.

This place was comfortable, though. She felt safe and she could rest here. She would even have a kami to accompany her. There was no telling what things she could learn if she were to stay.

There was a tug.

Kagome jerked slightly, gaze jumping to her finger. It was the red string. It had suddenly gone taut, tugging insistently at the finger to which it was affixed.

"Ah," Amaterasu said, eyeing the string. "It seems someone is not quite ready to release you."

Kagome was scarcely listening. She could not remove her gaze from the thread, eyes widening as the tugging began to fray the connection more rapidly.

It was him. She remembered him.

"I need to go back," she said, the words leaving her before she had even thought to speak them.

Amaterasu turned her impossibly bright eyes back to Kagome's face.

"Are you certain?" she asked. "This decision is not one to be made lightly or with haste, my daughter."

Kagome's gaze darted from woman's face to the string and back again. She remembered him. But she was also beginning to remember the rest of it. Kikyou and the Taira and the knife and the spider.

Coming back would be painful. She had been stabbed, after all, and she still could not recall exactly how much damage might have been done to her body. And returning would mean having to deal with this new mess, having to sort out exactly what had gone on with Kikyou. And that was to say nothing of the rest of it.

She was weary. It would be so much easier to simply remain here.

She met Amaterasu's eye. There was no judgment, no expectation of any sort in the otherworldly fineness of her features. Whatever she chose, the kami would accept it.

"…I need to go back," she repeated softly. "He wouldn't leave me alone if he had a choice. I won't leave him on his own."

Amaterasu smiled.

"I confess that I am glad to hear it," she said. "I want very much to see what you will do with the things that are coming together. And do not worry. Peace will find you again soon. I will see you again soon. And in the meantime, I will give you a small gift."

* * *

Something was strange.

Kagome awoke, abruptly and clearly, to this sensation. She found herself staring at the roof above her for several long moments, confused and yet strangely clear-headed.

A glance told her almost nothing about where she was, save that the room was vaguely familiar. Still, it might have been any room that she had ever seen in the Heian-kyō for its complete lack of any distinctive features.

Midoriko knelt just to the left of the futon she was tucked into, her head bowed low over her lap. She appeared to have nodded off. Kagome wondered exactly how long the older woman had been watching over her.

She wriggled one arm free of the blanket and reached out, intending to wake the elder miko and relieve her of her watch. Surely she would hurt her back if she continued to sleep in that position, and she was feeling fine so there was no need for the older woman to-

Kagome froze.

She felt fine.

She looked incredulously to the arm she had lifted to touch the woman, certain that it was the arm that had been injured in the attack. Moving it should have been agony.

Kagome lowered the arm slowly, curious. There was not a twinge of pain as she brought it back down to rest at her side. She raised her other arm, bringing it across her body. She hesitated, fingers hovering just over her shoulder.

Biting her lip, she pressed down.

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Kagome blinked slowly. She pressed once more, digging in harder with her nails this time. Still there was nothing more than the ordinary pinch of discomfort.

Had all of it been some horrible delusion?

She sat up in the futon, scarcely registering the astonished gasps of the other attendants around her. She reached down, pushing the heavy blankets down her legs and fumbling for a moment until she was able to loosen the tie that held the sleeping yukata she wore closed. She tugged until the garment was loose enough for her to shrug her left shoulder free of the material.

Another round of gasps went up. Someone nearly shrieked. Then silence, complete and total, descended upon the room.

Her shoulder should have been a mess. It should have been a grotesque sight, flesh and muscle rent by the dagger's blade.

It was none of those things.

Instead there was a sun, its rays stretching across her collarbone and down as far as the slight swell of her breast. It was slightly darker in color than the flesh surrounding it, but somehow still appeared to have a radiance to it as if it were shining.

"By the kami…"

Midoriko's breathless gasp told her that the woman was awake. A quick glance told her that the rest of the attendants in the room had frozen, their eyes fixed on her bare shoulder.

Her concern for them was fleeting, though. The sun on her shoulder consumed her thoughts even as it sent her mind reeling.

It had been real. The field had been real. Amaterasu-sama…

Kagome bolted up from her bed in a tangle of blankets and clothing, abruptly enough that several of the attendants jumped. They moved hurriedly out of her way as she went to the shoji, sliding it open with an unceremonious clatter. Behind her she heard Midoriko call out, but there was not room enough in her mind to heed it.

In a confused blur of moments she reached the entryway of the building which she absently realized was the Chūgū's residence and then was outside. Several guards stood stationed there, their looks confused as they caught sight of her disheveled figure. Kagome moved past them without so much as blinking and they did not stop her, but stood astonished in her wake.

Feet bare, hair a tangle falling wildly down her back, and clothed only in a light sleeping yukata, Kagome made her way out of the Dairi and determinedly down the avenues of the court. After a few moments the guards caught up with her, trying to gain her attention to no avail. A few reached out as if to physically restrain her, but balked before ever their hands touched her flesh. The sight the lot of them made was a bizarre enough one that they soon had a crowd trailing after them, the murmurs of the incredulous courtiers filling the streets.

On some level Kagome was aware of the impropriety of what she was doing, but she could not bring herself to care. Something was tugging at her, drawing her forward. She had to keep moving.

By the time she reached the steps of the Chūwain the crowd behind her had grown considerably, the spectacle drawing many courtiers out. No one could understand it. Nearly the entire court had witnessed her attack. Rumors had been circulating for days that she was on her deathbed, scarcely a thread left to hold her to the world. Now she walked, almost ran, before them without the slightest hint of a wound obstructing her movements.

The steps which normally took some effort to get up seemed to fly by beneath her feet. With a sudden flash of insight Kagome understood exactly where she was going. Only moments later she was there, standing before it.

The statue of Amaterasu that Midoriko had once led her to so long ago gazed down benevolently upon her, the same expressiveness in the stone face that had struck her the first time she had seen it. But it was different now. There was real life in the face, real warmth in the eyes that looked down upon her.

Amaterasu was there.

Entranced, Kagome reached out her hand. Amaterasu's hand stretched out, the tips of warm fingers meeting her own.

For a moment she knew complete peace, a happiness and certainty so deep that every moment of her life came together in her mind as a series of steps that had led her to this moment. Everything had had a reason. Everything had been beautiful, even the pain. Everything would be alright.

The mark of the sun on her shoulder flared with sudden brightness and she blinked hard against the blinding light. The hand withdrew and she stood once more beside a stone statue, its face kind but vacant. Her hand fell slowly back to her side, a chill rippling over her skin as she came back to herself.

A faint murmuring sounded behind her and she turned her head slightly. From the corner of her eye she could just see the throng of courtiers ringing the small pagoda in which the statue was housed, though their expressions were difficult to make out.

Their silence, however, said much, and the chill on her skin increased with realization that she wore nothing more than a thin sleeping yukata, her previously injured shoulder entirely bared to their eyes. She reached up hurriedly, pulling the material up over her shoulder as best she could as her mind raced in an effort to explain what had just happened to them.

She was saved the trouble of an explanation, red and gold filling her peripheral vision for a moment before a swath of red fabric was draped over her shoulders. Clawed hands tugged at the material, pulling it closed around her, and she could feel the warmth of his body though she could not bring herself to look at his face.

"Shut up," he said, lowly enough that only she could hear. "Not a word until we're out of here, alright?"

Kagome gave a faint nod to indicate her understanding. As long as she did not have to try and explain what had just gone on.

She choked back a gasp as she was lifted, the haori pulled more tightly around her as he tucked her against his chest. He turned to face the dumbstruck crowd, the cradle of his arms largely shielding her from their sight.

"If there was any question of the...the former Empress's actions being a sign of the disapproval of the kami, it is now settled," he said, voice low. "Return to your residences. It will be a few days before the Miko will see anyone."

Kagome kept her eyes on his face as he spoke, partly because the way that he held her prevented her from seeing much else. She could see the line of his jaw tighten as he spoke, the tension she could feel in his arms echoing it.

No one spoke. They hardly so much as blinked, the crowd parting wordlessly to allow them passage. The hanyou kept his steps measured, unhurried even as the courtiers trailed after them, but she could feel the strain in his muscles. She wondered if he was angry with her.

If he was, how should she explain herself? She scarcely understood what had just happened. She could hardly even recall how she had gotten to the statue, what had driven her from her room without even a thought to her appearance. She had acted like one possessed, and she must have looked it, too.

What had they seen as they watched her? Could it be the same as what she thought she had seen? Or was even her own mind no longer to be trusted? She felt uncertain, off balance. She had only just woken up and already she had caused a mess.

She blinked, realizing suddenly that they were no longer moving. They had arrived back at her sick chamber within the Chūgū's residence. Inuyasha must have sent the others out of the room because they seemed to be the only two there.

Inuyasha stooped, setting her down carefully atop the mussed blankets of the futon. Kagome raised her eyes hesitantly to meet his own, but she scarcely had a moment to catch her breath before his arms were around her once more. 

His face was pressed against the crook of her miraculously uninjured shoulder, his hold so tight she feared he might crush her. In the absolute silence of the room she could hear the uneven rattle of his breath, her own heart stuttering in her chest as if to keep pace.

"You," he snarled, the word cracking faintly. "You-!"

"I'm sorry," she responded without thinking. "I'm so sorry."

"Moron," he breathed. "Don't apologize."

"I'm sorry," she said again, her own voice breaking.

He choked on a laugh, the sound a hollow bark as he pressed his face more closely to her shoulder. Her arms came up around him and she found that she was shaking.

"I knew you wouldn't…" he choked on the last word, unable to get it out. "I knew you were too damn stubborn to go."

"I'm fine," she said, needing to reassure him as much as herself. "I told you I wasn't going anywhere, didn't I?"

It was beginning to dawn on her, though, how close she had come to losing everything. To losing him.

He managed somehow to loosen the band of his arms, pulling back enough to meet her eyes. Kagome swallowed, still shaking and wanting nothing more in that moment than to lean in and press her lips to his. She leaned forward.

His gaze shifted to her shoulder, breaking the spell. He reached for the edge of her yukata, tugging just enough to reveal the edges of the sun scar. He tugged again, baring her shoulder and revealing the rest. He reached out tentatively, pressing his fingers to the scar as if to assure himself that it was real. Kagome flushed faintly.

He shook his head, coming back to himself. He met her eyes, thumb tracing an absent line over the scar.

"What happened? With that statue and this…"

"What did you see?" Kagome said. "Back there, I mean. Did it…did it look like Amaterasu-sama was…there? Was she…?"

"Alive?" he finished for her when she hesitated. "It looked like it. For a moment anyway. And this thing was glowing."

He indicated the scar with a nod of his head. Kagome breathed a small sigh, relieved to hear it.

"It was real, then," she said.

Inuyasha frowned.

"I saw her," Kagome explained softly. "When I was…well, I am not sure where I was, to be honest. I think…I think I might have been dying."

Inuyasha flinched.

"Amaterasu-sama was there, though," Kagome hurried on. "She was talking to me, telling me I had a choice. That it was mine to decide what I wanted to do. I told her I wanted to come back and…"

She gestured vaguely to her shoulder. Inuyasha waited, his eyes on her face.

"What do you think it means?" she said after a moment. "I mean, it seems like…like Amaterasu-sama has some sort of plan. She was pleased when I said I would return. And then the statue…doesn't it seem like she must have some sort of plan?"

Inuyasha scowled.

"If you getting stabbed was a part of her plan, then it's a fucking stupid plan and I hope she leaves you alone from now on," he said with real venom.

Kagome gasped.

"Inuyasha!"

He huffed, unrepentant.

"The only good thing to come out of it is that whatever just happened will give the court something else to gossip about for awhile," he said. "Kami knows they needed something to distract them."

Kagome paused at this, something tugging faintly at the back of her mind. A chill went through her.

"Distract them from what?" she forced herself to ask.

Inuyasha's eyes met hers for a moment before sliding away.

"That should be obvious," he said.

"But it's not," Kagome persisted. "So explain it to me."

She could see Inuyasha's jaw tighten for a moment.

"…I took care of the guard right away," he said after a long moment. "He was dead before he hit the ground. He deserved it. And that one guard, Hobo or whatever his name is, confirmed that he was one of her head guards while I was away. For some reason she left him behind when she went. Her clan seal was found on the corpse, though."

Kagome felt the blood drain from her face. Inuyasha's hand dropped from its resting place on her scar.

"So I had to make something up to tell the court. I told them she'd panicked after our wedding and begged to return home for awhile. That she'd…she'd misunderstood things between us and that this…that she made a mistake."

"Bastards were quick to call for her head. She might be one of their own, but she didn't have many friends in the court after she lost her clan. By the laws, the punishment for anyone making an attempt on a servant of the Tennō is death."

"You can't be serious," Kagome spoke through lips gone numb.

Inuyasha shot her a glare.

"You think I like this?" he snapped, eyes flashing. "You think I wanted things to turn out like this? Dammit, Kagome, if I'd have known-!"

He cut himself off, his gaze dropping once more.

"I never should've left her alone again," he resumed lowly. "I knew she was struggling and I…I ran off anyway. It’s my fault, all of it. But how do I forgive her for this?"

"You can't just kill her!" Kagome said, her mind spinning. "Whatever might have happened, she's still your wife! She's still-!"

"The marriage is going to be declared void," Inuyasha broke in flatly. "And I've already declared a punishment. Exile from the court and confinement to the outside Fujiwara residence. The courtiers were pushing for worse. This…this is the only way I can protect her now."

Kagome blinked, her mind still reeling.

"Wait," she said faintly, pressing a hand to her temple as if that might still the rioting of her thoughts. "Just wait. We need to think this through. You can't possibly believe that-"

She cut herself short at the look on his face.

"I can believe it," he said quietly. "And maybe that's the worst thing."

Kagome bit her tongue. Silence fell between them.

"Lay down," Inuyasha commanded after several moments, not meeting her eyes. "You need to rest."

"I don't-"

"Lay down," Inuyasha repeated more forcefully. "I need to go deal with them."

He rose, moving towards the shoji. He paused there, hand on the wooden frame.

"I won't talk about this with you again," he said. "She made her choice, and now I have to live with mine. And I'll be sure to order the guards to hold you here, so don't even think about getting up."

And then he was gone, the shoji slamming shut behind him.

Dazedly Kagome lay back, not a doubt in her mind about him giving those exact orders to the guards. That and she suddenly felt incredibly tired.

Slowly the attendants began to trickle back into the room, moving slowly as if to keep from waking her. They need not have worried. Sleep was a long time in coming.

* * *

Her confinement to the Chūgū's residence turned out to be a matter of more than a day. Normally Inuyasha's heavy-handedness would have put her at her wit's end, but Kagome found herself grateful for it. It seemed that everything had changed within the space of several moments and she appreciated the silence and the room that his confinement allowed her to try and sort through it all. Besides which she found that despite her miraculous recovery, she had not entirely regained her usual energy. Even overlong walks tended to tire her.

She knew this because, thankfully, Inuyasha widened her confinement enough to include the entirety of the inner palace, provided that a guard hand-selected by him shadowed her every move. It was a little obnoxious, but not enough so to cause her to forget what had transpired. She would take the inconvenience over the anxiety that being alone now often evoked in her.

The majority of Inuyasha's days were taken up with dealing with the court. He made the excuse for her that she was resting and meditating on what had occurred, but he needed to be among them as much as possible with things as unstable as they were. A reminder, he said, that he was there to keep order. He wore his sword sheathed at his hip at all times.

He made sure to visit her at night before bed, though. He relayed to her the gist of what was going on among the courtiers, though she was certain he held back a great deal no matter how she pried. His visits were far more for the sake of checking in on her condition than keeping her informed, as he made obvious when he spent the majority of his time speaking to Midoriko rather than to her. The elder miko had spent nearly every day since the incident monitoring her and thus was more than used to giving the Tennō frequent updates on her condition.

He could not stay the night with her. Even if he were to dismiss all of the attendants-which would have been suspicious enough in and of itself- he would still have the guards to explain his comings and goings to in the middle of the night as he was entirely unwilling to even entertain the thought of dismissing them. Thus his visits were short, lasting no more than the time it took for him to speak briefly with her and Midoriko before he ordered her to bed and went off to his own chambers.

Kagome was more than a bit surprised to discover how lonely her room felt without him there. When she awoke in the night, strangled by darkness and the feeling of slipping slowly from her own body she reached for him and found emptiness. She could only curl in on herself tightly, reminding herself that she had managed on her own before and could do so again now.

He had been faithful to his word in never speaking about Kikyou with her again. Any time she attempted to broach the subject he rebuffed her so quickly it was enough to make her head spin. After a handful of attempts she gave up altogether, deciding to wait to try the subject until it was a bit less fresh for him.

She continued to think on the matter on her own, though. It was difficult, beyond difficult, for her to believe that Kikyou had truly intended to have her killed. It simply did not match with the image of the woman that she had in her mind.

Still, she also knew how much Inuyasha meant to  
Kikyou. If she had truly thought that he had abandoned her for another woman, would she be capable of this? She had lost nearly everything else in the world that she loved. Would that final loss have been too great to bear?

The evidence was against her, as well. She had gotten a moment to speak to Hojo when he had come on shift among her guard and he had verified what Inuyasha had told her. The guard had been among Kikyou's own and her clan seal had been discovered on his body after the fact.

She did not want to believe it. The Kikyou she had known might not have always been kind, but she had been fair. She had been strong. Kagome needed to see her, to look into her eyes and find the truth for herself. Somehow she needed to find a chance to visit the Fujiwara residence and speak to her. If the woman had truly desired her death, she was sure she would know it.

All of this she kept quiet, of course. Inuyasha refused to entertain the notion of letting her out of the Dairi, let alone the Heian-kyō. Nor did she have any particular desire to prod the wound for him. Even though his visits were short she often saw the guilt of what had happened darken his features, though it was hard to know if he was troubled more by what had befallen her or Kikyou.

On the fourth day after waking she decided to make a trip to Inuyasha's quarters. It was early in the day and she was almost entirely certain that the hanyou would not be there, but she found that she could not shake the whim once it had gotten hold of her.

She justified it to herself as wanting to see if she could perchance find something within his chambers that might hint at the goings on in the court, considering that Inuyasha himself had been vague at best in relating things to her. She chose to ignore the part of her that thrilled at the idea of returning to that too-familiar place.

And so after the morning meal she set out, a small guard trailing along at her heels. After her many walks she had grown accustomed to their constant presence, had even become friendly with a few. It was hard not to when it was generally the same several men assigned to her.

She was certain Inuyasha kept the pool small for the sake of her safety. The fewer people involved, after all, the less the risk that one might be assigned whose loyalties were not as secure as might be hoped. Kagome found herself grateful for Inuyasha's caution in the matter.

Familiar though she was with them, Kagome made no attempt at conversation as they went. She was not particularly eager to share the destination of this stroll with them, nor did she relish the idea of coming up with an explanation as to why she was making the trip. Thankfully the guards were content to be silent escorts so long as she remained within their line of sight.

The days were growing warmer, and Kagome paused on the walkway leading into Inuyasha's chambers to admire the light reflecting off the waters beneath. The last traces of frost had disappeared from the pond and when she looked closely Kagome could see flashes of the koi gliding about beneath the still waters.

She moved to cross the remainder of the walkway, only to jerk herself to a stop halfway through the motion. The guard following closest behind her nearly ran into her at the abrupt stop, shifting in an instant to a defensive stance at her side.

"O-Miko-sama?" the man said, hand hovering just above the sword at his waist.

The guards had insisted on using this new form of address with her ever since she had woken. For the moment Kagome ignored the title, lifting a hand to ease the guard back. She peered around him.

"Hold on," she murmured, her eyes scanning the water for the thing that had stopped her in her tracks.

She could feel the remainder of her guard drawing up tight around herself and the first guard. She ignored them, frowning as her eyes roved the still waters. She could have sworn…

There! Kagome slid forward to the railing, leaning over to get a better view of the water. A hand clamped down on her elbow, steadying her while at the same time attempting to pull her back. She shrugged the gesture off, eyes intent on the ripple she could see building along the surface of the water not far from the walkway.

The feel of youki prickled down the length of her spine as she watched the column of golden scales writhing just beneath the surface of the water. It was far too large to be one of the koi, though the fish did not scatter as it moved among them. Nor could she sense any malice in the feel of its youki as it glided slowly up to the walkway.

The hand on her arm tugged her back away from the railing as the water bubbled up, a dark mass emerging slowly. Two of the men moved as if to draw their swords and Kagome pushed forward to grab at them.

"Wait a moment," she said. "Just wait a moment. It is not dangerous."

"Please stand back, O-Miko-sama," one of the men spoke. "We are under strict orders from his Majesty to take no chances where your safety is concerned."

"Please, at least move enough that I can see," Kagome huffed, pushing with her shoulder and wriggling until they made enough room that she could get a look at the creature between them.

Large, liquid eyes, doleful and dark, peered up at her from beneath a curtain of straight, ink black hair. The face appeared female, pale and delicately boned. The ridge of her brow was scaled and scales climbed the column of her throat, trailing down the length of her bare human torso. It was difficult to see past her waist with the rest of her body still submerged, but Kagome could just make out a lengthy golden-scaled tail gliding beneath the water.

A ningyō.

The youkai blinked at the sight of her, shifting forward. She lifted a hand, gesturing for her to come closer. Kagome could just make out the fine film of the webbing between her fingers. Kagome attempted to move forward, but quickly found herself thwarted by her guard. The ningyō's frown matched her own.

"I need to speak to the miko," she said softly, her voice low and cool like the sound of water rolling over smooth stones.

"We are the O-Miko-sama's guard," one man spoke. "If you wish an audience with her, you will have it in our presence."

The girl's frown deepened, her eyes shifting to Kagome's face.

"How did you get here?" Kagome asked, resigned to the idea that the guards would not be allowing her any privacy. "How do you know me?"

The ningyō cocked her head to one side, considering this.

"All the waters are his waters," she said slowly. "He sent me to these waters to bring a message to you."

Kagome frowned, her brows drawing together.

"He?" she said. "Who?"

She had learned from her studies under Kaede that ningyō were able to move through any body of water, even ones that were seemingly unconnected. But who could this 'he' be? And how would he have known where to find her?

"Suijin-sama, of course," the girl replied, as if it should have been obvious. "He has been watching you, waiting to repay the debt he owes you for your kindness on the beach."

Kagome's eyes widened. She heard a murmur go up among the guards.

"Suijin-sama…?"

"Suijin-sama? The kami Suijin-sama?"

"How…? What…?" Kagome said, struggling to gather her thoughts amidst the chatter.

A memory surfaced. The children and the turtle on the beach. The turtle slipping away into the waves. Kagome gasped.

There was no way...

"The turtle?" she said, looking to the youkai.

The girl merely blinked, lifting her shoulders in what might have been a shrug.

"Suijin-sama takes what form he will. It is not for me to know," she replied. "He merely said that I should deliver something to the miko Kagome-sama."

She lifted a hand from the water, extending it towards her. Clutched in it were two objects that were difficult to make out, and a guard reached out to take hold of them before Kagome could get near enough. The ningyō frowned faintly.

"Those belong to Kagome-sama," she said. "One is from the ship. The other is a token of my people. Suijin-sama has put us at your disposal should you need us, though I would urge you to be prudent in calling upon us. Even our loyalties to Suijin-sama only extend so far."

Kagome saw a brief flash of fangs as she spoke the last, her limpid eyes sharpening for a moment.

Kagome nodded in acknowledgement, though the surreal quality of the moment prevented her from absorbing fully what was being said. Abruptly the woman dove, her back an arch of pale scales followed by the long golden line of her tail slipping back beneath the water behind her. A flick of translucent fins was the last thing Kagome saw before she disappeared entirely from sight.

Kagome leaned forward, eyes scanning the water for the glint of golden scales. She was gone as quickly as she had come, though, the koi now the only sign of life within the waters. She turned to the guard who had taken the objects from the girl, extending her hand. The man handed the objects over, apparently satisfied that they were no danger to her.

One of the two things was nothing more than a tiny scale, perfectly golden in color. Kagome knew enough of youkai not to take it lightly, though. The flesh of a ningyō was nothing to be trifled with, and men had killed for less. She guessed that this was what the girl had meant when she had spoken of a token of her people.

The second object was a bit more puzzling. At first it seemed to be nothing more than a damp roll of rough black cloth. Kagome took the scale in her free hand, tucking it away safely in the front of her robes in order to examine the black cloth. She had to use both hands to unroll and unfold the length of it, her nose wrinkling a bit at the strong smell of brine that had soaked into the fabric.

There was a symbol embroidered into one side of the cloth, darkened by long exposure to water. Kagome frowned at it for a long moment, struggling to make it out. Her eyes went wide as the image suddenly clicked, resonating with another one in her memory.

"What is it, O-Miko-sama?" asked the guard nearest to her, and she jolted in surprise.

She refolded the cloth so hastily she nearly dropped it, shoving it into the front of her robes and cringing at the feel of the damp fabric against her skin.

"I will need to speak to his Majesty before I can say anything for certain," she said. "Have you any idea when his Majesty intends to return to his chambers tonight?"

The man shook his head.

"His Majesty has never made a habit of keeping the guards well informed as to his Majesty's movements," he replied. "Though if the past several days are any indication, his Majesty will likely not return until late."

Kagome nodded, having figured as much.

"Then I will await his Majesty in his chambers," she said.

She swept across the remainder of the walkway, giving a nod of acknowledgement to the guards posted in front of Inuyasha's chambers. By the bemused looks written across their faces as they greeted her she could tell that they had been able to see some of what had just happened. She left it to her guard to explain things to them as they took up their own places in front of the chambers.

The entryway hanging fell closed behind her, leaving her in the characteristic dimness of the hanyou's chambers. Kagome halted where she stood, surprised at the sudden wave of relief that swept over her.

She took a few steps forward before flopping down gracelessly onto one of the many cushions scattered across the floor, allowing herself a moment to simply look about. There was something so familiar about the room, something so soothing about the feeling of being there, that for several long moments she merely sat and thought of nothing at all. Absently it occurred to her that the whole room smelled of him.

She forced herself into action once more, reaching into her robes and cringing as she peeled the black fabric away from her skin. She unfolded it once more, examining the embroidered symbol as if it might have changed in the last few moments. It was the same, and she was left with the same feeling of unease.

Kagome wracked her brain, scouring her thoughts for every last bit of what the ningyō has imparted to her. She had unwittingly done a kami a favor and in return he had allowed her this, which meant that it must be intended to serve as some sort of boon. The ningyō had also mentioned something about a ship, meaning that she must have retrieved it when it had fallen overboard.

Ship as in one. But could there be more? And where? The ningyō could inhabit any waters of the world. Was the ship close-just off the coast? Or was it somewhere far out to sea?

Instinctively Kagome doubted the latter. The symbol and the fact that the cloth had been brought at all suggested otherwise. Still, she thought it best not to rule anything out until she had at least spoken to Inuyasha.

And it might well be some time before she could do that. Kagome sighed, resigning herself to a long wait.

She stood and made her way over to his large futon, noting the pristine appearance of it. It did not appear to have been slept in for some time. Still, she reasoned to herself, she might as well be as comfortable as possible while she waited.

She lay down, gathering a few pillows together to prop herself up and shifting until she was comfortable. Mentally she began to run through the encounter again, trying to parse out any small detail she might have overlooked before.

And then it was dark, quiet, but she could feel the awareness of someone watching her prickle along her skin. Slowly her eyes slid open, and she blinked blearily at the hanyou leaning over her side as she realized that she had fallen asleep at some point. Inuyasha withdrew his hand from her as quickly as if he had been burned.

"Wha-?"

"You reek like fish," he said.

Kagome blinked.

"I-"

"Your guards said you've been waiting here all day," Inuyasha broke in once more. "You could've waited in your own room. I went there first, anyway, and you're obviously still tired."

"You never stay there long," Kagome returned after a beat. "And I am not tired. And this is what 'reeks', not me."

She proffered to him the black cloth that she had fallen asleep clutching, wrinkling her nose slightly at the scent of brine. Inuyasha's expression mirrored her own as he took the cloth gingerly between two clawed fingers, holding it as far from his nose as he could keep it.

"Kami, how in the seven hells did you manage to find something that smells like it's been stewing in a tide pool for weeks?"

"How could I have gotten to a tide pool when I haven't been allowed beyond the outer wall of the Dairi in days?" Kagome countered.

Inuyasha glanced at her.

"A youkai brought it," Kagome continued. "That was why I wanted to wait and see you."

Inuyasha tensed.

"Nothing happened," Kagome hastened to assure him. "The guards were right there. There was no danger."

He scarcely seemed to hear her, eyes darting back toward the entryway as if he might make for the guards there. Kagome reached out to place a restraining arm on the hand that held the cloth. She was surprised to see the hanyou nearly flinch, realizing abruptly that the last time they had touched had been right after she had woken.

Inuyasha pulled his arm away. Kagome slowly allowed her hand to drop.

"It was a ningyō," Kagome said after a beat of silence. "It came up in the waters just out there. It said it had been looking for me and gave me that."

She gestured to the cloth he still held.

"Looking for you?" Inuyasha echoed.

"There was a turtle…" Kagome began, cutting herself off as she realized how odd it sounded. "Nevermind. Suffice it to say that Suijin-sama felt he owed me a favor."

Inuyasha's brow furrowed.

"Suijin?" he said. "You mean-?"

"Exactly who you're thinking," Kagome said. "Though I cannot say that I particularly understand it either. The ningyō said that she had been sent to me on his errand, though. She gave me that cloth and a scale so that I could summon her back."

Inuyasha looked at her for a long moment as if attempting to formulate some response to this. At length he shook his head.

"I don't even…" he muttered to himself. "You…Nevermind. Just…what was so important about this shitty smelling thing that you had to crawl into my bed?"

Kagome drew back, nettled by his tone. A moment's study showed her that the glow of anger that lit his eyes was turned entirely inward, his gaze fixed on the cloth in his hand.

"Look at the symbol on it," she said.

Inuyasha unfolded it across his lap, turning it over to the side on which the symbol was visible. His eyes widened.

"She said it came from a ship," Kagome said softly.

"One ship?" Inuyasha echoed her earlier thoughts with surprising accuracy.

"I'm not sure," Kagome replied. "She wasn't clear."

"But the kami wanted you to have this," Inuyasha reasoned. "He sent this to you on purpose. It's gotta be a warning."

Kagome's stomach sank to hear her fears confirmed.

"It is," Kagome murmured, certainty settling over her like a shroud.

They both fell silent, gazing at the symbol of the roughly stitched, hooded dragon that filled the black space of the cloth. The hidden symbol of the Taira clan. The symbol that meant they already had the kami only knew how many ships in position off the coast.

They were surrounded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mini- history lesson:
> 
> -Suijin-sama: The god of all waters in Shintō belief.
> 
> -A note from long ago: kame/kami: Kame means turtle and kami means god. I was doing some Romaji wordplay. I'm relatively certain in Japanese the two Kanji look nothing alike, but the words at least have similar pronunciations. Not the most clever of literary devices, but I like to have fun of my own.
> 
> -ningyō: Literally "human fish" in Japanese, but often translated as mermaid in English. There are a variety of descriptions of these creatures in Japanese folklore, but one common trait is that the flesh of a mermaid has the ability to give immortality to anyone who consumes it. See Rumiko Takahashi's other work Mermaid Forest for more on that.


	29. Of the Past and the Present

"There's no way they could have done this on their own," Inuyasha murmured, eyes hard. "No way in the seven hells. Ships don't just come outta nowhere, and if they'd been building a fleet themselves then someone woulda known about it. They woulda needed supplies, manpower…something!"

"They couldn't have diverted the materials without you noticing? They do have members on the Council and other clans that might have supported them while they were doing it," Kagome said, trying to put aside her own dismay in order to help him work through this.

Inuyasha shook his head.

"No way," he said. "Some of the courtiers might've supported them, but not as far as they could throw them. No clan would ever risk funneling enough supplies to another to let them get the upper hand. And even back then I would've noticed if that much were being taken out under my nose."

Kagome glanced down at the scrap of weathered cloth, considering this. Her brow furrowed.

"The foreigners," she said suddenly. "Remember the weapons we found when we found your father? They had this same symbol carved into the hilt of some of them as is on this. We found him on Tsushima. Maybe no one in the court could have gotten the supplies or the ships to the Taira without anyone noticing, but a foreign court could have done it easily were they so inclined."

Inuyasha's eyes swept from her to the cloth.

"…Yeah," he said slowly, considering this. "Yeah. If the Taira promised them that they'd oust me or give 'em some land in return, it wouldn't be difficult. I don't recognize the symbol, though. It's not one I've ever seen."

"Well, the Taira would know," Kagome said. "If we just confront them with this, they can't-"

"No," Inuyasha said, loudly enough to startle her. "You're not going anywhere near them."

"But we have proof-"

"No," Inuyasha snapped, meeting her eye squarely. "Think about it, Kagome. Right now they've got no idea that we know any of this. That might be the only thing we've got going for us. Besides, what would confronting them get us? You'd piss them off and they still wouldn't tell you shit."

Kagome frowned, silently conceding the truth of this. If they already had ships in position off the coast, knowledge truly might be their only advantage until they could rally their own forces and get them into position. Attempting to confront them would likely only lead to a denial, and though it would also allow them the freedom to attempt to try them in the court it might provoke the ships to attack if they caught wind of it.

"Fine," Kagome conceded after a beat. "Give it to me."

She held out her hand for the cloth. Inuyasha gave the appendage and then her an incredulous look.

"Someone needs to find out what that symbol means," Kagome said. "I may not be as inconspicuous as I would like, but I still have more freedom to move about the court unnoticed than you do. At least, I will as soon as you lift the restriction on me."

Inuyasha clutched the cloth more tightly, a scowl tugging down the corners of his mouth.

"No way," he said. "I'll keep this. I'll figure out what it means on my own."

Kagome frowned at him.

"It was brought to me, Inuyasha," she argued. "By all rights it is mine to do with as I wish. And besides, I can-"

But Inuyasha was already shaking his head.

"Not a chance," he said. "Not a chance in the seven hells. I keep this. You keep resting-"

"I can't rest anymore!" Kagome snapped, ire flaring. "All this resting is going to kill me! I want to be out. I want to be useful. What good am I to anyone locked up like a bird in a cage?"

"You'd be alive," Inuyasha said, meeting her eye squarely. "That's all that matters."

Kagome fell silent, irritation cooling at the look on his face.

"I'll resent you," she said quietly after a moment. "I know that you are only trying to keep me safe, but I know myself well enough to know that I will begin to resent you if you keep trying to go about it this way. I promise I will do my best to be careful, but I need you to trust that I can take care of myself."

Inuyasha gave her a long look, frustration writ clear in the tension of his features. At last he held out the black cloth to her, jaw clenched. Kagome took it from him.

"The guard stays," he said, his tone brooking no argument. "Anywhere you go, at least two of them go with you. The ship's flag stays secret. You don't poke your nose anywhere near the Taira. I hear you've done any of that shit and I put you right back in the Dairi until everything blows over, you got it?"

Kagome nodded.

"Swear it," Inuyasha demanded.

"I swear," Kagome replied.

"Fine," Inuyasha huffed, though he did not look particularly pleased. "It's late. Take your guard back to your residence and get some rest. I'll lift the restriction starting tomorrow."

He turned his face from her. Kagome rose slowly, a bit put off by the abrupt dismissal. As she moved to pass him, however, he caught her wrist.

He murmured something, barely loud enough for her to catch, before releasing her. Kagome stood blinking for several moments, scarcely able to believe her own ears.

Woodenly she began moving forward, absently tucking the flag away into the front of her robes as she went. At the entryway she glanced back at the hanyou, but his back was to her.

She followed her guard back to her residence, only vaguely aware of her surroundings as she went. She was faintly startled to suddenly find herself alone in her own room, sinking to her knees on her futon after a few moments.

"I can't lose you."

The words echoed in her ears the rest of the night.

* * *

The next morning found Kagome at a loss. Part of it might have been the fogginess that clouded her head after a poor night's sleep. The rest, however, was simply a complete lack of ideas.

For all that she had fought Inuyasha for the right to look into the symbol on the sail, she had no idea where to begin searching. The Taira were the only ones that she knew with any certainty would know what it was and, as Inuyasha had pointed out, confronting them now would likely cause more problems than it would solve.

On top of that she had to be very cautious in her inquiries. Word of this could not be allowed to spread through the court, and she could not risk asking anyone who might send word back to the Taira. Her options for people she felt safe turning to were limited, especially with Miroku and Sango still out of the court.

After mulling it over for a good part of the morning from the comfort of her own futon, Kagome decided at last that the best she could do was to start with the people she trusted and work from there. She forced herself up and out of bed, readying herself quickly before heading out.

True to his word, Inuyasha had lifted the restriction on her. Her guard gave her no trouble when she told them that her destination was the Chūwain and they were quickly on their way. Thankfully it was yet early in the morning, too early for many to be milling about, and Kagome was saved the trouble of having to deal with any courtiers.

They passed beneath the tori and mounted the steps. Kagome was faintly surprised at how quickly the effort began to wear on her, though she tried to write it off as merely the inactivity of the last few days.

She was so preoccupied that she did not notice the figure standing at the top of the steps until her group was nearly upon it. Apparently the figure had been similarly preoccupied, turning sharply as Kagome came to a halt a few steps down from it.

The young miko found herself looking directly into startled red eyes, the emotion chased swiftly by a flash of something akin to fear as the skin of her face blanched a paler white than even its natural pearl-like hue.

These emotions flitted swiftly across the fine face to be replaced by the usual curl of disdain around the corners of her blood red lips. Even this, though, could not entirely conceal the unease written deep in her eyes, and she twisted her fan up to shield the lower half of her face as if this might protect her.

"Miko-sama," she murmured, dipping in a faint bow.

With that Kagura hurried past her down the steps, a gust kicking up as she reached the mid-point. In a swirl of wind she was gone from sight.

Kagome blinked after her, uncertain what had just happened. The youkai had practically fled at the sight of her, as if she had been caught in the midst of something terrible. Kagome's glance turned automatically toward the spot where the woman had been standing, as if that might provide some clue.

There was nothing there visible to the naked eye, nor even in her spiritual sense. The spot merely faced the wing in which-

Kagome froze, a sudden idea occurring to her. If anyone would be versed in foreign matters, it would be him. He was hardly someone she could count as trustworthy, but in his current position could he really do all that much harm with the information?

She chewed her lower lip, debating within herself.

Nodding to herself, she started off toward the wing where Sesshoumaru was being held.

* * *

"What makes you think that this Sesshoumaru will not kill you where you stand?"

Kagome fought back a shudder, eyeing the daiyoukai where he stood with seeming indifference writ clear in his posture. He was much recovered since she had last seen him, though the sleeve that would have covered his left arm hung empty still. Aside from that, though, he looked every bit the cool predator that his name suggested.

"You can kill me if you like," Kagome said, keeping her voice steady only with an effort of will. "But it would not do you much good. My guards are just outside the door, and killing me would not get rid of the barrier. Your situation would remain exactly the same, save that the Tennō-sama would likely have your head for it. You do not strike me as someone inclined to futile exercises, Sesshoumaru-sama."

In the blink of an eye he stood before her, scarcely a hair's breadth away. Kagome's heart jumped into her throat. It was an effort to bite back a yelp.

Sesshoumaru's eyes met her own, chill as an evening in the depths of winter.

"Do not presume to know what this Sesshoumaru would or would not do, human," he said, not the slightest hint of inflection in his voice. "I do not share the same weakness for humans as that hanyou."

"Obviously," Kagome said faintly, raising her hands in preparation to defend herself.

Sesshoumaru made no further move towards her, though. She relaxed a fraction.

"I have a proposition that might serve to earn you some of your freedom back, Sesshoumaru-sama," Kagome said, cutting straight to the point.

She had no desire to remain there longer than was necessary. She could only imagine what the daiyoukai's father had been like in life, if his son's youki was this intimidating.

One corner of his mouth curled faintly in disdain.

"This Sesshoumaru does not make deals with humans," he returned.

"Even if that deal is your only hope of ever getting out of here?"

The daiyoukai's eyes slid away from hers dismissively. Kagome frowned.

"Just look at this," she pressed, reaching into the front of here robes to pull forth the flag. "Do you recognize the symbol?"

His glanced at the flag as she unfurled it before him, his gaze lingering for only a moment. Just long enough for her to catch the flash of recognition in his eyes.

"You do," she said. "You recognize it."

Sesshoumaru eyed her and Kagome got the impression that he was slightly surprised by her insight. She held the flag up higher, forcing it back into his line of sight.

"This Sesshoumaru has no intention of aiding the hanyou in cleaning up whatever mess he has managed to create," the daiyoukai said, turning from her fully.

"Inuya-The Tennō-sama did not cause this," Kagome said. "His Majesty is merely trying to fix it. Shouldn't you want that, as well, Sesshoumaru-sama? The blood of the former Tennō-sama, your father, runs through the both of you. Should you not concern yourself with the fate of his lands, as well?"

"Not so long as they are in the hands of a dirty-blooded, human-loving fool."

Kagome bit her tongue against a sharp retort. He had the answer. He was right in front of her, holding the key to figuring out who the Taira were conspiring with and possibly even who had had a hand in his own father's untimely demise. She just needed to get him to give it up somehow.

She opened her mouth, her mind working frantically to come up with something that might be convincing to such a cold-hearted man.

She was cut short, however, by the clattering of the shoji behind her. She spun to face it, startled by the sound.

Midoriko stood in the doorway, framed on either side by her guard. Kagome tucked the flag away hurriedly, a glance out of the corner of her eye telling her that Sesshoumaru had not so much as glanced behind him at the sound.

"The Tennō-sama has been searching for you," Midoriko said. "His Majesty says it is urgent that you meet him in chambers immediately."

Kagome frowned.

"Does…his Majesty know where I am?" she asked.

Midoriko nodded.

Inwardly Kagome winced. It had not taken Inuyasha long to find her out. She wondered if he had set a tail on her guard. How much trouble would this little venture get her into?

"Then I will go to his Majesty immediately," she said. "Thank you for alerting me, O-Miko-sama."

She started forward, and then paused.

"I will come to visit with you again soon, Sesshoumaru-sama," she said, by way of letting the daiyoukai know that they were not nearly finished.

He spared her a glance over his shoulder, unmoved.

Midoriko slid the shoji shut behind her as she exited the room, joining her at her side as she set off down the hall with her guard. A faint frown graced her lips as she eyed her.

"Is there a reason for you wishing to prod a beast so early in the morning and so soon after regaining your freedom?" she inquired, raising a brow.

"There is," Kagome replied. "And I had meant to explain it to you as soon as I finished up here."

"Best to save that until after you have dealt with his Majesty," Midoriko said. "I will be expecting a full report soon."

Kagome nodded, offering her a fleeting smile before starting off toward the Dairi to face whatever punishment was to follow.

* * *

Of all the scenarios Kagome had envisioned, this had not been one.

No, this was far, far worse.

She stood in the entryway, unable to force herself to move any further into the room. The tension was so thick that it had a force all its own, holding her back.

Abruptly her stomach roiled. She had never expected to see him again, and especially not here and with him. What should she say to him? What could she say to him?

"What-?"

The pathetic, squeaking sound was all that escaped her when she opened her mouth.

Neither man answered her, nor even spared her a glance. One continued to stare sullenly at the cushion beneath him, while the other's fierce glare did not leave him.

Kagome forced herself to take one step forward and then another, though it felt like she was slogging through ankle-deep muck. The whole situation felt like some bizarre nightmare that her overtaxed mind had conjured up.

Inuyasha shot her a sharp glance, directing her with a look to the cushion at his side. Kagome approached it hesitantly, pausing before she knelt down.

She had already hurt Kouga enough. There was no need to add onto it now.

She shifted the cushion a bit, just enough to show the wolf youkai that matters between herself and Inuyasha were not what he had thought them to be on that awful day. She ignored the sharp look Inuyasha directed at her.

"Why are you here, Kouga-sama?" she asked quietly when it became obvious that the man had no intention of speaking.

"It's not like I wanna be here," the wolf snapped, so harshly that she nearly flinched. "I had to come."

"Watch your mouth in my court, wolf shit," Inuyasha snarled in return.

Kouga raised his eyes in a glare, but dropped them again upon catching sight of Kagome. It was a long moment before he would speak again, and she could feel Inuyasha growing more tense behind her with each passing moment.

"Something is going on out there," Kouga said at last.

Kagome nearly sighed in relief at the words, as she was almost certain that they had just narrowly prevented Inuyasha from exploding. She frowned, though, as they actually sank in.

"What do you mean?" she asked. "Has something happened?"

"Nothing's happened," Kouga said, still not meeting her eye. "That's just it. Almost nothing's happened at all since-"

He cut himself off, but Kagome understood well enough. Since they had parted. She bit her lip, realizing how much he still must be hurting after all that had passed between them.

"Anyway," said Kouga, clearing his throat forcefully. "There's been nothing. No turf challenges. No border skirmishes. Nothing. I even went to the couple of chiefs of the territories around mine. Nothing on their ends, either."

"You dragged your flea-bitten ass all the way here because it was too quiet for you?" Inuyasha bit out.

Kagome shot him a sharp look over her shoulder. Inuyasha did not spare her a glance.

"Like I said, dog shit," Kouga spoke through gritted teeth. "I wouldn't have fucking come if I didn't have to. It was quiet, and then Ayame came after me-"

"Ayame?" Kagome echoed.

Kouga glanced at her for a moment before his gaze fell.

"The Taira youkai," he said gruffly. "She followed me out of the court or something. Said she was hiding or had escaped or something like that. I dunno. She babbled so much it was hard to get anything out of her that made sense."

Kagome blinked, a memory flickering dimly in the back of her mind.

"The redhead?" she said. "The redheaded wolf youkai from the Taira clan? She is Ayame?"

She could have sworn she saw a faint flush rising on his swarthy cheeks. He ducked his head further.

"Redhead. Annoying. Babbles all the time," he said brusquely. "That one."

"She left the court?" Kagome said. "She told you that she escaped the Taira and came to you?"

"That's what I said, isn't it?"

Kagome held up a hand in a placating manner.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she said. "I am just trying to understand. Please, what exactly has she been telling you, Kouga-sama, that would drive you to come here?"

"She escaped the court," Kouga said slowly, as he might explain something to a child. "She said none of the Taira have done it in years, but that things are such a mess with them right now that she was able to slip away. She said something's…wrong in the clan. She's not sure what, but the head has been acting strange for awhile now and she was afraid of what would have happened if she stayed there. She said she…"

He murmured something that caused his cheeks to heat once more. Kagome chose to disregard this, focusing instead on what he had told her.

"Is Ayame-sama still back with the Eastern Wolf Tribe, then?" she asked.

Kouga nodded.

"I didn't wanna force her to come back around here," he said. "But between what she said and what's been going on with the youkai…"

He paused, his eyes rising to meet hers. Kagome froze. For that brief moment that look was back in his eyes, that warmth that she had once tried so hard to answer. She felt heat flooding her cheeks, a deep flush of shame. This time it was her who had to avert her eyes.

"I thought you at least oughta know," Kouga finished more quietly. "I don't know what you'll make of it-hell, I've got no clue what to make of it. But I gave you my word, so consider this my way of making good on it."

"…Thank you," Kagome managed after a moment, her voice scarcely rising above a murmur.

Kouga nodded.

"Would you be able to remain in the court for a few days, Kouga-sama?" Kagome asked, forcing herself to recover. "We will need some time to decide on a course of action, and I think it would be best if you were here to consult once we do."

She could feel Inuyasha bristling behind her, though he held his tongue. Kouga frowned, hesitating for a long moment.

"Alright," he said grudgingly. "But I'm not hanging around this time. I need to get back to my clan as soon as possible."

"I understand," Kagome replied. "We will try-"

"The rooms you were in last time are still open," Inuyasha broke in, his voice causing the hairs on the back of her neck to rise. "You'll stay there. Go. Now."

Kouga hesitated, his glance sliding from the hanyou to Kagome's pale face. Slowly he rose, exiting without another word.

There was a beat of silence following his departure in which Kagome did not quite dare to turn around.

"What in the seven hells was that?"

Kagome drew a deep breath, steadying herself. She still did not turn to face him.

"I'm not certain," she began. "It's difficult to-"

"Not that," Inuyasha snarled. "You. The wolf. What happened between you?"

Kagome bit her lip, uncomfortably aware of the fact that Inuyasha knew nothing of Kouga's joining her on her mission outside the court or what had passed between them during that time. She forced herself to turn partially to face him, tucking a strand of hair back behind her ear.

"Kouga-sama came all this way to bring us that news and that is what you choose to concern yourself with, Inuyasha?" she said, shooting him a glance from the corner of her eye. "Honestly-"

"I'm not a fucking idiot, Kagome!" Inuyasha thundered, palm striking the floor hard enough to rattle a nearby brazier. "It's clear as fucking day that something is going on between you and that flea bitten wolf! I-!"

"I don't think you an idiot, but I will think you a fool if you continue to carry on like this!" Kagome snapped, irritation rising to cover her discomfort.

She should not need to explain to him anything that might have passed between her and Kouga. In light of the circumstances it was neither important nor anything that he had a right to know. She needed his focus and his help now more than ever.

Inuyasha blinked at her, some of the heat fading from his expression. Kagome lifted her eyes to meet his.

"I don't want to do this on my own," she said quietly. "But I will if I have to."

Inuyasha was silent, but the remainder of the fierceness faded from his features. His eyes fell away from hers.

"I know you're only trying to protect me, Inuyasha," Kagome said softly. "And I am grateful for that. Always. But you cannot protect me from everything."

"Protect you?" Inuyasha echoed with uncharacteristic softness. "Is that what you think this is?"

His eyes met hers. Kagome blinked, at a loss. She didn't understand. A faint flicker in the back of her mind told her that she did not want to understand. She shifted, fixing her gaze on a dim corner of the room.

"What course of action do you think we should pursue in regards to the Taira?" Kagome asked, eager to change the course of the conversation. "We'll need to decide on something quickly. I imagine we don't have much time either way if things were bad enough that Ayame-sama chose to flee, but I would prefer to have everything sorted out before Kouga-sama has to return to his clan."

A length of silence followed her words. At last she heard something akin to a scoff from the hanyou's general direction.

"What makes you so sure that the Taira wolf isn't a trap?" Inuyasha said.

This surprised Kagome enough to return her attention to him.

"Think about it," Inuyasha continued. "How did she get out without their noticing? Why go to the scrawny wolf, of all people? It's not like the whole court didn't think the two of you were-"

Inuyasha's expression darkened as he cut himself short, but Kagome got his meaning well enough. The whole court had believed her to be intimately associated with the wolf Lord at one point. Ayame could have been sent to him in the hopes that he would carry word back to her.

"But why?" Kagome asked. "What would they be hoping to gain by making sure this got to us?"

Inuyasha shrugged, shaking his head.

"Who knows?" he said. "Probably trying to distract us from something else. Keep our attention here in the court on them."

Kagome blinked, a thought occurring to her. She pressed her hand to the spot where the sailcloth rested just beneath her robes.

"The ships…?"

Inuyasha's brow furrowed as he considered this. He gave a small nod.

"Maybe," he said. "If they're planning on doing something with the ships soon it would make sense."

Kagome frowned.

"We've got no way of knowing," she murmured, half to herself. "Whether or not this is a trap, the only people who would know for certain are the Taira."

"We'd have to interrogate the wolf girl," Inuyasha put in.

"But we can't possibly ask her to come back to the court without knowing that there's no danger to her," Kagome said. "Not if she really did flee for her life."

"That doesn't leave us with a lot of options, Kagome," Inuyasha said dryly.

"I know," she said. "I just don't want to make any hasty moves. Something is going on with them. We just need to untangle what it is. Until then, can't we post a guard to watch them or something?"

"And say what when the court gets up in arms about it?" Inuyasha said. "The Taira won't be quiet about it if they think I'm trying to spy on them."

"Unless that is what they wanted," Kagome countered. "If Ayame-sama truly was an attempt to distract us, won't they welcome an increase of attention? Put them under a guard. See if they protest it or not. In the meantime I can look into things using other channels."

"Other channels?" Inuyasha echoed, one dark brow rising.

"Nothing dangerous," Kagome hastened to assure him, raising a hand as if to stem the flow of remonstrance she could sense coming. "I just need to ask around a little bit. See if I can find anyone who might know a little more about the Taira that might help us to make sense of things. Perhaps talk to Kouga-sama and see if he can recall anything else about Ayame-sama that may be of use."

Inuyasha tensed.

"You talk to him again, I'm in on it, you understand?" he said.

Kagome frowned, on the verge of arguing. She stopped herself, thinking better of it.

"Alright," she agreed with a nod.

Inuyasha eyed her, surprised at her easy assent to the condition. He gave a slight nod.

"Good," he said.

"Then it's settled," Kagome said, nodding in return. "I will leave it to you to select a guard to set around the Taira while I look into the matter of the sail and the clan."

Inuyasha made a faint noise of agreement as Kagome rose to leave. She turned, intent on returning to her residence to see if she could not come up with a list of people that might be able to provide some information about what was going on within the Taira. Sesshoumaru, at least, would not be going anywhere anytime soon. She had time to figure out how exactly to-

"Kagome."

She halted at the threshold of the entryway. She turned to find that the hanyou had risen, standing several lengths from her.

"You," he said tentatively, struggling for words. "You and…the wolf…"

Kagome tensed, watching him warily. There was an uncharacteristic openness to his expression, though, a quality that was almost vulnerable. His eyes rose, meeting her gaze for an instant. His expression shuttered.

"Forget it," he said, turning from her. "Just go."

Kagome hesitated, looking after him.

"Inuyasha…" she said softly.

He said nothing in reply, though she was almost certain he had heard her. After a beat she turned and swept through the entryway, pushing it from her mind as the hanging slid closed behind her.

Perhaps there were some things that were better left unaddressed between them.

* * *

The list was woefully short.

Kagome knew she should have expected as much, but she had hoped it might be otherwise. The Taira were too careful by far. There was almost no one save themselves that she could think to turn to for any sort of reliable information, and very few people outside of them that she felt safe asking for even hear-say about them. She did not want to risk rousing anyone's suspicions.

After wracking her mind through every possible scenario, Kagome realized she had lost the daylight. She decided she had best get some sleep and decide on a course of action when her mind was a bit fresher in the morning.

Sleep was a fickle thing that night, though. She came in and out of a light doze all night, her mind circling continuously around the fact of the wolf Lord's sudden presence in the court.

Yet again he had stuck his neck out for her. Had left his clan behind in order to help her. The gratitude she felt towards him was mingled with shame and more than a little frustration. He did not have to go to such lengths for her. There was nothing that bound him to her anymore.

Except that the way things had ended between them had been awful and uncertain. He had simply left, barely allowing her time to explain herself or apologize. Not even allowing himself to vent his frustrations as he should have.

His presence here was a second chance for her to make amends somehow. To make up for her former fumblings.

If only she were brave enough to take it.

* * *

Kagome arose later the next morning than she was accustomed to. The poor night's sleep left her groggy, but after a bit of struggle she managed to forced herself up out of bed and back to the Chūwain. Midoriko did not seem a poor place to start when looking for information about anything in the court, and after speaking with her she could pay another visit to Sesshoumaru. Not that she had had much luck in figuring out how to encourage him to speak with her.

She sighed under her breath as she reached the top step, turning toward the main hall. She went through the purification ritual absently, her guard following her example before they entered the main hall.

Midoriko was easy to find, working with quiet concentration on a prayer scroll in the main hall. She offered the guards tea in a room not far from the main hall while they waited for them to finish their conversation. The men agreed readily and the pair was left in relative privacy.

"It is good to see that you continue to be in good health," Midoriko said as she settled in on the cushion across from her. "How does your shoulder fare?"

"It has been fine since I woke," Kagome replied. "The scar is still there, but it does not bother me at all."

"I am glad," Midoriko said, though the way that she eyed her shoulder spoke more of wariness than happiness. "You came, then, to explain your presence here yesterday?"

"Partly," Kagome said. "But I also have some questions that I was hoping you might have answers to, if you have a bit of time to spare."

"Of course," Midoriko said readily.

"I need to know about the Taira," Kagome said. "Particularly anything…strange you might have noticed recently."

Midoriko's brow furrowed slightly.

"Strange?" she echoed. "Is something going on, then?"

"Something is," Kagome affirmed. "The problem is that we cannot seem to figure out exactly what that something might be."

Midoriko frowned.

"I am afraid I might not be of much help, then," she said. "The Taira are highly private, to say the least. I know little about their comings or goings within the court, as they tend to avoid the Chūwain. I know a bit about their history, but little else."

Kagome's face fell slightly. She had expected about as much, though.

"Anything you can tell me is welcome," she said. "Especially if you happen to know anything about their connection to…to Miyasu-sama."

Kagome bit her lip, half-wondering if she should have said the words now that they were out. She had mulled over the matter of Miroku's father and what they had discovered outside of the court for some time, wondering if it was her place to begin looking into the matter without the houshi present. She still had not come to any solid decision on the matter, but she could not very well take it back now.

"Miyasu-sama?" Midoriko echoed, eyeing her curiously. "You mean the good Houshi's late father?"

Kagome nodded.

"Well, as far as I am aware, he had no more to do with the Taira than most in the court," Midoriko said thoughtfully. "As a clan of youkai they have certainly never had too much to do with spiritualists, save observing the most basic rituals. Miyasu-sama…well, I suppose he was more ambivalent towards the Taira than most in the court, if I recall correctly."

The elder miko frowned, her gaze turning inward for a moment. A deep furrow appeared upon her brow as she struggled to summon up some memory from the depths.

"Why do you say that, Midoriko-sama?" Kagome prompted.

"I think…" Midoriko said slowly, laboring to catch hold of the fleeting thought. "He mentioned to me once that he took some issue with the former Taira headman. Something about him and the poor young boy he had brought into the court…"

She lapsed into silence for a long moment, frowning down at her clasped hands. Kagome forced herself to wait without speaking, afraid to break the woman's line of thought should she interrupt.

"He did not like the boy for some reason," Midoriko spoke at last, raising her eyes to meet Kagome's. "I remember because I found it strange. The entire matter was a strange one. Miyasu-sama was an exceptionally kind man, but he disliked that ill-fated child from the moment he was brought into the court by the former headman."

"Which was strange in and of itself. The boy was human, and common-born at that. The headman said it was some strange twinge of pity that drove him to bring the boy here. No one ever really understood it. I cannot imagine that his was a very happy life."

"His name," Kagome said, a strange feeling stealing over her. "Do you recall what the boy's name was?"

Midoriko nodded.

"I believe so," she said. "The boy was not often seen outside of the Taira residence, but between the strangeness of his name and his circumstances he became a bit of an infamous matter within the court. He was called Onigumo, I think."

Kagome felt as if a bolt had struck her. The hair on the back of her arms stood on end.

Onigumo. The little boy from the village. Fuyumi's boy. He had not been killed by the fighting between the clans, but had been brought to the court along with his mother. By all logic the discovery should have been a small one, nothing more than mere happenstance, but to her mind it had a certain weight that she could not ignore.

"Kagome?" Midoriko said, nearly startling her. "Are you alright? You've gone pale."

She had risen, gently laying the back of her fingers across Kagome's forehead. Kagome blinked up at her, hoping that she did not look as startled as she felt. A faint frown deepened the lines of the elder miko's brow.

"Have you been well since you woke?" she asked softly.

Kagome forced herself to nod.

"Quite well," she said.

Midoriko eyed her, obviously not entirely convinced. She moved to resume her seat, though, her demeanor growing thoughtful.

"I was certain you would pass," she said, abruptly enough that Kagome jerked. "When I first got a clear look at your wound…every bit of my experience as a healer told me that it was fatal."

Kagome stared at her, mute with shock.

"But then I began to see the thread," the elder miko continued, speaking almost to herself. "Every time he appeared it was there. It did not fray and it did not snap. It tugged you back, slowly but surely. It anchored you here. Never…never have I seen such an unyielding bond before."

She fell silent, a wistful look clouding her features for a moment before she lifted her gaze. Kagome met her look, feeling heat begin to rise to her cheeks at the implications of Midoriko's words.

"I don't know what you mean," she managed to get out, the words thin.

"You do," Midoriko said simply. "Very well, I imagine. And I have decided I have no further desire to know what happened between you and Amaterasu-sama. That business is yours and no one else's, save perhaps his. But I will allow myself this much: I intend to do everything in my power to see that that bond is not broken, and I would urge you to do the same."

"I…there's no way I could…" Kagome fumbled, so taken aback that she could not manage further denial. "I mean, he and I…there's no way at all…"

"I have always wished to help you, to atone for the mistake that brought you to me in the first place," Midoriko spoke as if she had not heard her, a light growing in her dark eyes that Kagome had never seen there before. "It was not until I saw that thread that I truly understood. In you the kami have not given me a punishment for my weakness. You are not my burden to shoulder."

"You are a gift that has been presented to me, should I have the sight to see it. You are my chance to bring about a fate that was once offered to me, but that I was too frightened to take hold of."

Kagome frowned. Midoriko smiled faintly.

"I once mentioned to you the man who created the statue of Amaterasu-sama," she said. "Perhaps if I were to finish that tale then you would come to understand."

She folded her hands, gaze dropping to her lap.

"His name was Akio," she spoke softly. "He was the product of an illicit relationship between the headman of a minor clan and a woman from the village bordering his lands. Under ordinary circumstances he would simply have been left in the village to be raised, but as he grew older he proved to have great skill as an artisan. His father made the decision to take him from his mother and bring him into the court, in the hopes that his skills would prove a point of prestige for him."

"They did. Akio produced a great number of works at the Tennō's request, all of them vastly superior to much of what the artisans of the court could produce. He was a quiet man by nature, often lost in thought. The works he produced were widely admired, but between the circumstances of his birth and his reserved nature he never gained himself many close friends within the court."

"He came often to the Chūwain, though, as works featuring the kami were his favorite subject matter. I was still in training when first we met, and our paths often crossed here. He was kind enough when we met, but it always seemed that his mind was partly elsewhere. I think I took far more notice of him than he did of me."

"Until he began the statue of Amaterasu-sama, that is. I found myself enthralled by it from the moment he began its creation. For me it had a feeling of destiny about it, somehow. I began asking him about it, watching him as he worked. He seemed to share my same feeling about its significance and suddenly I found that he was opening up to me, sharing things about himself that I was certain he had never told another living soul. Before I realized it we had become close friends."

Midoriko paused, frowning faintly. She shook her head, eyes fixed on her hands.

"No, not friends. It is strange. Even now I try to deny what I struggled against so stubbornly back then. Before I realized it, we…we were very much in love. But our association earned me a great deal of censure within the court. My cousins in my clan, even my spiritual teachers grew cold towards me. One even went so far as to tell me that I would never see any advancement should I continue to be so public with the association."

"I was yet very young. A part of me had always acknowledged that Akio and I were different in a great number of ways, not the least of which were the circumstances of his birth. He was a wonderful man, but…some small part of me had always accepted without question that he was my inferior. When the courtiers began to treat me so coldly, it served to bring this back to the forefront of my thoughts."

"Suddenly I found that he was a threat to my chosen path and to the life I had lived so comfortably in the court. I began to pull away from him, though nearly every feeling in me rebelled. He was too perceptive a man not to notice the shift in my manner. He..."

Midoriko's voice faltered. Her hands flexed once in her lap, her knuckles going white for a moment. There were several beats of silence before she could speak again.

"Without saying as much, he made it obvious that he wished to marry me," she said, so softly Kagome barely caught the words. "I panicked. It seemed as if my whole future were going to pieces. Everything I had been so certain of my entire life was being snatched away. I distanced myself. I made it obvious that I had no intention of becoming his bride."

"By that time the statue of Amaterasu-sama was long since finished. Akio had no pretense left to continue returning to Chūwain regularly, and as soon as I made my response apparent he simply stopped coming. I cannot say that I do not understand why. We had grown so close, he must have been shocked when I rebuffed him so abruptly."

"Years passed and distance grew up between us. I was given the title of O-Miko, as I had always thought that I wanted. And then the throne war began. Akio was one among the many who lost their lives. I was the one who performed the final rites for him. I can still recall…"

Her voice petered out. A faint tremble went through her frame. Kagome sat silent, transfixed. She wanted to reach out to the woman, to try and offer her some comfort, but somehow she could not make herself move.

"I can still recall standing before the funeral pyre," Midoriko resumed, her voice steady but somehow hollow. "And knowing in that moment what a terrible mistake I had made. In the flames I could see our life as it would have been, the happiness of knowing that I was never alone. I could see our children as they played and a life together that, though more humble than what I was accustomed to, was nonetheless full of everything worth wanting in this world."

"I knew that if I lived to be one hundred there would never be another such one for me. I had thought that our positions in the world were too far apart for a marriage to make sense. But he had been given to me, and I had been too much of a fool to take a gift that was offered. To this day, there has never been another that I could even have considered."

At last Midoriko looked up at her. A sheen of tears brightened her eyes, but there was a faint smile hovering at the edges of her lips. Kagome blinked at her, shaking her head slowly.

"I'm sorry," she said, her voice cracking faintly. "I'm so sorry for you, Midoriko-sama. For what happened to Akio-sama. But you must know…surely you must see that I am different. This is different."

"Is it?" Midoriko returned. "Perhaps on the surface. But I am not so young as I once was, nor am I such a fool still as to miss the threads of fate as they are spun before my eyes. I cannot tell you which path to take, but I will stand behind you should you chose the more difficult one."

There was such unwavering conviction in the older woman's face that Kagome's next protest stuck in her throat.

She did not want to think about this. She did not want to hear it mentioned aloud or to know that her feelings might be so obvious to others. She did not want to face this.

Kagome stood abruptly, feeling panic beginning to well within her.

"I need to go," she said.

Midoriko looked up at her, nodding after a moment.

"I understand," she said. "Perhaps another time."

Kagome gave a small nod, experiencing a flash of remorse at her brusqueness after what the woman had just shared with her. Still, she was in no state to deal with such a conversation at the moment.

She bowed before setting off, exiting the Chūwain as quickly as she could without breaking into a run and forgetting in her haste even her guards.

She was moving so quickly that she nearly collided with the figure standing not far outside of the left wing of the temple.

The woman spun to face her, and Kagome caught a glimpse of eyes wide with shock and some fear. She stumbled back, an apology springing to her lips.

It died where it was as she realized with whom she was face to face. Once more Taira Kagura stood before her and before the Chūwain, unable to quite school her features into their usual scowl.

Kagome frowned, eyeing the woman.

"Is there something you need from here, Kagura-sama?" she asked. "You were here yesterday, as well. Perhaps there is something you are looking for?"

She was shocked to see a faint flush color the youkai's cheeks. Her eyes flared.

"You must be mistaken, Miko-sama," she snapped. "I am simply out for a walk. Am I now not allowed to walk where I please?"

Her eyes shifted back towards the building for an instant, an involuntary movement. For a moment something flashed across her face.

With a jolt Kagome recognized what it was.

"It's him," she said. "You want to see him."

Kagura's eyes widened, her color deepening. If she were the type of woman to flee, Kagome was certain she would have fled then. She took a half step back, but held her ground.

"I don't-"

"You do," Kagome cut her short. "You know exactly what I mean. I know it."

She knew it because the expression was so familiar. Because she had worn it herself so often and so hopelessly. Because mere moments ago she had seen the echoes of it written clear across the face of her mentor.

Kagura shut her mouth, setting her jaw as if for a fight. She met Kagome's eyes, the red in them fairly blazing.

"And what?" she said at last, the faintness of her voice undermining the challenge in it. "You have what you wanted, do you not? How will you make use of it, caged bird?"

Kagome eyed her for a moment before shaking her head.

"You want to see him, don't you?" she found herself saying. "Just staring at the building must be miserable. Come on."

She stepped forward toward the barrier, but Kagura did not budge. If anything her expression hardened further.

"You're more conniving than I gave you credit for," she hissed. "You let me see him and then what? I will be in your debt. What price will you exact for this kindness?"

"No price," Kagome replied. "I don't want anything. I just...I know how you feel, is all. I know how you feel too well to do nothing."

Kagura's expression eased slowly into an incredulous frown.

"…You do, don't you?" she murmured.

The youkai eyed her for a long moment, gaze flicking at last to the left wing.

"What, then?" she asked. "You allow me in and leave us, hmmm?"

"Not hardly," Kagome said. "Perhaps this makes me a fool, but I am not so much of a fool as to leave you unattended."

There was a beat of silence.

"Fair enough," she murmured.

Kagome nodded, taking that as an acquiescence. She stepped forward, raising her hand towards the barrier. Kagura stepped up quietly behind her. Kagome felt her youki brush along her spiritual sense like a small spark. She felt a flash of apprehension, the hairs along the nape of her neck standing on end.

This was insane. It made no sense.

She opened the barrier.

Kagura stepped through behind her and she closed it off behind them.

It seemed like only a matter of steps before they were at Sesshoumaru's chamber, Kagura's lips pursing as she eyed the shoji.

"I will wait out here," Kagome said after the silence had stretched for several moments.

"Yes," Kagura said, though she made no move forward.

After several more moments of silence, she slid the shoji open and swiftly closed behind her.

Kagome looked after her, uncertainty rising sharply. Should she go in after her? Listen in on what was being said? Both of them had proven themselves to be Inuyasha's enemies in no uncertain terms. For all she knew this was some ploy on Kagura's part to release the daiyoukai now that he had recovered enough strength to challenge his brother once more.

But she could still recall the look in Kagura's eyes. Not the look of a conniving courtier or a person bent on ill. In her look she had simply seen a person who wanted nothing more than to see the one they cared for.

Kagome moved away from the shoji, deciding that she would not wish to have someone listening in on her in similar circumstances. She would stay close enough should anything happen, but she would try not to intrude if it was not necessary. At least the two of them were trapped within the barrier should anything go awry.

A stretch passed in which Kagome could not catch a single sound from beyond the shoji nor feel any rise in the youki of its two occupants. Whatever passed in that room, it was not for her to know.

Abruptly the shoji clattered back on its hinges. Kagura emerged, sliding the shoji closed once more so quickly that Kagome caught only the briefest glimpse of the daiyoukai housed inside. He stood facing the door, golden eyes sharp.

"Let us go," Kagura said, sweeping past her without so much as a glance.

Kagome blinked, following in her wake after a moment. Kagura awaited her at the barrier, carefully avoiding looking in her direction. Kagome opened the barrier with a wave, allowing them through and closing it behind them with less trouble than she should have ever hoped for considering what a risk she had just undertaken.

Kagome stood for several long moments, uncertain what to do with herself after such an unlikely occurrence. Kagura did not move, either, simply standing at her side with her eyes fixed out on the sprawl of the court below them.

"You are a fool," the youkai murmured lowly.

"That makes two of us, then."

The youkai glanced at her from the corner of her eye, a crooked smile tugging faintly at the corner of her lips. It faded.

"I always pay my debts," she said.

Kagome frowned, opening her mouth to protest.

"I am well aware that that was not your intention," Kagura snapped, holding up a hand to forestall her. "Whatever thoughts, for lack of a more accurate term, might have been flitting around in your head, they do not concern me. I have decided. This is my decision."

The air of finality with which she spoke the latter struck Kagome as odd. Her next words scattered that thought to the wind, though.

"You have one day to decide what it is that you want from me," she said. "I will place no restrictions on it. I will find you when it is time. Choose carefully."

A gale rose from nowhere, tugging at Kagome's robes and pushing her forward a few stumbling steps with the force of it. When the wind had settled enough for her to see clearly, Kagura was gone.

Kagome blinked, standing uncertainly for several long moments. Slowly a feeling of satisfaction bloomed inside her chest.

She had had no thought of repayment when leading Kagura through the barrier. She had seen too much of herself, of her mentor, in Kagura's eyes to ignore it, whatever the circumstances. It could not be her, but perhaps someone else could snatch a moment of happiness.

And through it the kami had placed in her lap exactly what she had needed. She was not yet wise enough to see the threads being woven as Midoriko-sama could, but she could feel the faint tug.

Turning, she followed the pull in her shoulder wherever it might lead her.

* * *

Kagome approached the man tentatively. It was a rare thing to see him look quite so defeated, though she had some inkling of what might have gotten him into such a state. 

Before she could make any sort of gesture to gain his attention, though, he turned his head slightly. The wry quirk to the corner of his lips told her he had known she was there.

"You're a crappy sneaker," he said without real venom.

"I can't say that it was ever one of my aspirations in life," she attempted lightly, moving the few steps forward that took her to his side.

She did not sit. She would not sit unless he invited her.

The tug had pulled her right to his temporary residence, though thankfully this time she had had the presence of mind to gather her guard before departing the Chūwain. She had been both surprised and not at all surprised to find herself there, asking her guard to remain at the entryway to the residence to allow her a moment.

She did experience a small twinge of guilt at the thought that she was breaking her word to Inuyasha, but she could hardly imagine having this sort of conversation in his presence. He did not like the wolf to begin with, and something like this would certainly not help matters. It was best if he never learned about any of what had passed between them.

"I figured you would come around sooner or later," he said, drawing her back into the present. "I kinda hoped it would be later."

Kagome bit her lip, swallowing the slight sting of the words. They were well deserved.

"I understand," she said softly. "Would you like me to leave?"

Surprisingly he shook his head.

"No," he said. "If anything you're gonna say can get me out of this court quicker, then I'd rather get it all out now. I don't wanna waste any more time here than I have to."

Kagome nodded.

"It was very, very good of you to come," she said quietly.

Kouga glanced at her fully for a moment before his gaze slid away once more. A faint flush colored his cheeks.

"Just because we didn't…" he began, then halted as if choking on the words. "Just because things don't go the way you want doesn't mean you get to be a shithead and forget about all your promises. I gave you my word. My clan and I will be sticking to it."

She still had his support, then. And, by extension, some of the other youkai clans outside of the court. She was relieved to hear it, though at the moment the feeling was clouded by guilt. It was hard not to feel as if she had cheated him in some way.

"I cannot tell you how grateful I am to you for that," Kagome said at last, unable to muster anything better.

"It's fine," Kouga said with a shrug that was a little too sharp. "Now ask whatever the hell it is you were planning on asking. The sooner we finish with this the sooner I'm back with the people who actually need me around."

"I just need to know what exactly Ayame-sama told you," Kagome said, more than willing to turn her mind towards less sensitive subject matter to start with. "As close to word for word as you can give me, Kouga-sama. The more details I have the better I can judge what exactly the Taira might be attempting to do."

"She said…" Kouga began, pausing for a long moment to recall the words. "She said the clan head has been agitated lately. That he has been stirring up the clan, always talking about how the mutt is trying to turn the court into a place for half-breeds and humans. She said he's always been strange since he was young, that he's always had an odd scent to him, but that she never thought he would risk his own clan to get rid of the mutt."

"Lately, though, she said it seems like he's been planning something big, and she was afraid to be around in case he actually went through with it. She's not nuts like the rest of them. I mean, she's nuts, but not like that."

"And Ayame-sama had no idea exactly what the clan head might have in mind?" Kagome pressed.

Kouga shook his head.

"She said it's a pretty small group that makes the decisions for the clan, and they've always been secretive until it's time to put things into action," he said. "Crappy leaders, that's what. No one respects a pack leader that pulls shit like that. That's why Ayame had to leave."

"And she felt sure enough of you to seek you out?" Kagome asked.

The color in his face deepened for an instant. He shrugged.

"I dunno," he said brusquely. "I guess. She was always following me around when I was here before, bugging me to know what pack life is like. Wolves don't do well outside of a pack. She was probably just lonely and wanted her own kind."

His look softened. Kagome observed it, wondering exactly how close he had grown with the Taira woman since she had come to him.

"Did Ayame-sama ask you to come inform the Tennō-sama of any of this?" she asked.

"No," Kouga replied, frowning slightly. "No. She begged me not to come back here. She thought I might get caught up in the mess or that they might manage to figure out where she was hiding through me. I promised her that I wouldn't say a word to anyone but you and the mutt. I had to come, though."

If she had begged him not to come, then the chances were slim that the information was being used as a distraction. Unless she had known that Kouga would come to her with the information regardless of what she said to him. That, however, would be more than a bit of an uncertain venture to put all of this work behind.

"Is that all you needed?" Kouga asked, rising when her silence grew protracted.

He moved as if to go and Kagome reached out, stopping herself just short of touching him. He paused nonetheless as if he could sense her hand hovering just over his back.

"I know you probably don't want to hear this," Kagome said, her hand falling back to her side. "But if you're going to leave, I need to say it at least once before you go. I need you to know how sorry I am for the way things turned out between us. I handled everything so poorly, and if I could change things-"

"You would what, Kagome?" Kouga cut in, an acrid edge to his voice. "You'd make yourself love me? Mate with me? Have cubs with me? You already tried that, remember? It didn't work out."

He started forward towards the porch of the residence. Kagome bit her lip hard.

"You would have made a great mate and father," she called after him, unwilling to leave things on such an awful note. "I know it. Now you just need to find someone who actually deserves you."

Kouga paused, turning part way to face her.

"You deserve me," he said lowly, his eyes dark. "You just don't want me."

Kagome's heart constricted.

"It's not that simple," she protested weakly. "I wanted it to be you."

"Why?" Kouga retorted. "Because it would be easier for you? Too fucking bad. Even I know that's not how things work."

Kagome flinched. Kouga's glare softened. He turned fully, taking a step back towards her.

"You didn't feel anything, did you?" he asked. "When I kissed you or touched you. It was just me wanting to believe you did. Or you would. Or something. But life's not easy like that, not for anyone. And it wouldn't be worth shit if it was. I wanted you. I'm probably always gonna want you at least a little. And that's shitty, but it's how it is. You don't get an easy out and I don't either. So save the apologies and just let me work it out on my own."

He reached out a hand, tentatively touching her cheek in a way that negated some of the roughness of his words.

"This ain't gonna destroy me, Kagome," he said lowly. "I love you, but-"

"Hands off. Now."

The low voice sent a thrill of pure terror through her. Her gaze jumped to the shoji that led out onto the porch.

Inuyasha stood in the opening there, holding the edge of the shoji so tightly that she could see the wood of the frame splintering in his grip. The look on his face made her feel as if she had had the breath knocked from her lungs.

Before either she or Kouga could move, Kagome felt herself being yanked back from the wolf. In another instant she was nearly slung over the hanyou's shoulder, and in one bound they were over the wall of the residence. Kouga was completely out of sight in a matter of mere moments.

It took the space of several moments for Kagome to gather enough of her wits to realize what was going on. She tried to push herself somewhat upright, aware that they were in the streets of the court and she was slung over his shoulder like a sack of cheap goods.

"Inuyasha-"

"Shut up," he snarled, lowly enough that she froze. "Not a fucking word."

She fell silent, her skin turning to ice at his tone. She had no idea how much he had seen or heard, but she knew enough to know that this was not his usual irritation. Her stomach churned at the thought of the conversation that was to come as soon as he arrived wherever they were headed.

A small mercy was that night had fallen while she was with Kouga, meaning that their figures were scarcely visible in the darkened streets at the speed Inuyasha was moving. Another small mercy was that he had the decency at least to put her down as they came to the walkway where the guards stood before his chambers, though he fairly pushed her to walk ahead of him. The guards said not a word as they crossed the threshold, and she fleetingly wondered if her own guard that had been left behind at Kouga’s residence would be informed of where she was.

His chambers were nearly pitch black as he had not lit the lanterns before he had set out. Kagome was almost grateful for it. It was too dark for her to be able to look him in the face.

Silence stretched between them until Kagome thought she might go insane. She could feel the hanyou looming not far behind her.

"What…" Inuyasha managed at last. "In the seven hells was he talking about?"

Kagome bit her lip, her eyes sliding closed. The moment of truth had come at last.

"Kouga-sama…he…he joined up with us for some time while we were traveling outside of the court. He was helping us to gain the support of the youkai clans."

"…He was with you," Inuyasha said lowly. "He was with you and you didn't say a fucking word about it to me."

"It wasn't like that," Kagome said. "You don't understand-!"

"What don't I understand?!" Inuyasha yelled, his eyes flashing suddenly before her in the darkness.

Kagome gasped, stumbling back. The eyes and the shadow attached to them pursued her, pressing her back into a corner.

"Do I not understand that you lied to me?" he snarled. "Do I not understand that he's touched you? Kissed you? What else don't I understand, Kagome?!"

Kagome found herself frozen in the face of this tirade, unable to respond when faced with what it must look like to him. She blinked at him in the darkness, shaking her head slightly.

"Did you want to be with him?" Inuyasha asked lowly, his eyes piercing hers in the darkness. "Do you want to be with him?"

Kagome met his gaze, surprised to see something like fear lurking just behind the rage that was bright there.

"…I came back, didn't I?" she managed softly after a moment.

Inuyasha’s eyes searched her own for a long moment. He shook his head hard.

"I won't let that fucking bastard have you," he said. "Not him, not Sesshoumaru, and not that fucking guard. No one. Too much…too much gets taken. They don't get to take you."

Kagome opened her mouth to correct him, to assure him that she had no intention of going anywhere.

His lips closing over hers prevented that.

Kagome blinked, her mind unable to process anything beyond the instantaneous warmth that shot through her. A faint choking sound escaped her.

After a moment the pressure on her lips increased, a hint of desperation in the insistent press. Kagome's heart was hammering in her ears, the sound drowning out everything else and adding to the surreal quality of the moment.

This wasn't happening. There was no way this was actually happening. Something like this couldn't happen. There were a thousand reasons that-

Two things happened at once. His hand slid tentatively through the hair at the nape of her neck, tangling there and cradling her head. His eyes also slid open, meeting hers with a warmth and a need deeper than anything she had ever seen before in him.

Everything slipped out of her mind like water through a sieve. Her eyes slid shut, her lips pressing against his in turn. One of her hands slid up to clutch at the fabric of his haori, searching for some sort of anchor against the wash of sensation that swept through her.

She could hear something like a low sigh, almost a growl, pass through him as he pressed his frame more closely to hers. He was all lean muscle and tethered strength, fitting neatly against the slightness of her own frame.

His free hand slid to her side, wrapping around the smallest part of her waist. His lips worked against hers fervently if a bit uncertainly, drawing her to press up against him as a lick of heat curled through her stomach. A faint sound issued from her before she could think to stop it. Her free hand slid up, seeking out the first bit of warm skin she could find at the collar of his haori.

Inuyasha groaned lowly in his throat, the sound reverberating through her. His hips shifted against hers, rocking faintly. She felt again the hard press of him there that she had felt on that morning. This time, however, she embraced the sensation, shifting her own hips.

Reason crept like black tendrils along the back of her mind. This was wrong. If this kept going…

But why shouldn't it keep going? If she didn't have long…after all she had had to endure thus far…if they could never be together, why couldn't she have just this little piece of him? He needed her, and it was beyond her strength or desire to deny him.

Her thoughts scattered once more as she found herself lifted. Inuyasha hefted her as if she weighed no more than a feather, bringing her to his futon tucked away in the corner of the room and pushing past the gauzy overhang that shielded it from plain sight. He laid her down there, his body coming to rest with pleasant substantiality above her own.

Even in the dim light of the room she could tell that he was breathing just a little bit too hard. She could feel the slight tremor that ran through the arms on either side of her head. Apparently he could see her well enough in the dark, too, as he hesitated.

"I can't…" he panted, voice hoarse. "You have to…"

Somehow Kagome understood the words that he could not quite manage. If she wanted to stop this, it had to be now. She had to tell him now if she was uncertain.

And she was uncertain. So very uncertain about almost everything. Both of their futures hung by fraying threads.

But looking up at him, she wasn't scared. Not even a little bit. She wanted this little piece of him. She wanted this memory to hold on to, to make whatever might come after worth it. And if he needed her for some reason, whatever the reason might be, then that was enough.

She leaned up, just enough to press a kiss to the hollow between his neck and shoulder where his haori had begun to loosen. A shudder ran through him and he groaned out some low words that she decided she was better off not understanding.

Then his lips were on hers once more and she was done thinking. She could feel the slight sting of elongated incisors along her lower lip, sending a thrill along the length of her spine. She squirmed slightly, adjusting her legs until his lower body rested neatly within the cradle of her hips. His hips flexed against hers tentatively and she gasped against his mouth at the jolt of sensation the small move elicited.

His lips left hers, moving to her jaw line to press kisses that were endearing in their clumsy haste. Her hands sought out the warmth of his skin as his lips began to skim the line of her throat, resting at the nape of his neck and skimming just along the inside of the neck of his haori. His hips flexed harder against hers at the sensation of her blunted nails ghosting along the flesh of his back, a soft curse escaping him.

His lips reached the neckline of her robes and he glanced up at her, their gazes connecting instantly in the dark of the room. One hand slid up the length of her side, pulling loose the fabric where it was tucked into the waist of her hakama.

The fabric slid loose and he pushed it open, gaze sliding down to the skin that was revealed. Her chest bindings still hid most of her from his gaze, but the pale curve of her waist and the faint shadows of her ribs were visible in the darkness. Inuyasha laid a hand there almost reverently, the calloused warmth of his palm sending a small tremor through her.

His eyes flashed up to hers once more at the small movement. She met his gaze with her own heavy lidded one and he leaned in hurriedly as if he could not kiss her quickly enough. As she lifted her head to meet his lips, she felt his hand ghost the length of her stomach and up over the bindings on her chest.

With a vague pang of surprise she felt her bindings fall open, realizing with some small semblance of coherence that his claws had made short work of them. She could feel her nipples harden as they were exposed to the cool air of the room, the feeling sharpening as his robes brushed across her chest.

The inequity of the situation struck her and she pushed more insistently at the neckline of his haori. Inuyasha paused, disentangling himself from her just enough to give her an uncertain look.

"You, too," she murmured, pushing again at the haori.

He blinked down at her, eyes trailing the length of her as if he were seeing her for the first time. She was bare to his gaze from the waist up and Kagome had to fight the urge to cover herself, wondering for the first time in a long time if her body was at all appealing. She was thin to the point of perhaps being considered scrawny, and her breasts were small at best. Perhaps he would-

Thought abandoned her once more as he shifted his hand to tentatively cup one breast, thumb resting just against her nipple. Her back arched instinctively, pressing herself further into his palm. He blinked down at her, eyes travelling from her face to the breast he cupped in a sort of disbelief. He swallowed, and she could see the dark of his pupil expand impossibly.

"Kagome," he rasped, "I-"

"Don't stop," she murmured, cutting him off.

She rocked her hips against his own, partly for the thrill of the sensation and partly to move him from his inaction. She would not allow tonight to become a night of words and drawn out conversation.

Inuyasha grunted faintly, his head falling forward to the crook between her neck and shoulder. He murmured her name into the flesh there, hips jerking sharply against hers in response. She could not stifle a moan, working with hands that shook to loosen his haori and drag it down his shoulders to his waist. He assisted her, shifting awkwardly out of the fabric while still trying to keep as much contact with her skin as possible.

He palmed her breast more firmly, thumb sweeping over her nipple. Kagome squirmed, amazed at how quickly the sensation shot from her breast down to the growing slickness between her thighs. From the standpoint of a healer she had known for some time at least vaguely how things worked between a man and a woman. But she had never thought that that would be like this.

Inuyasha watched her face, thumb running over her nipple once more at the sight of her reaction. His other hand came to cup her neglected breast, teasing her nipple into a tight bud to match the other. Kagome leaned up eagerly to press her lips to his, feeling that if she did not do something the sensation would drive her out of her own head.

Inuyasha met her with equal fervor, lips slanting hard against hers. The weight of her breast in his hand, the warmth of her form writhing against his, the thought that this was even happening…

Kagome's hands tangled in his hair, pressing him as close as she could get him. The hard planes of his now bare chest pressed with delightful solidity against her breasts, sliding against her straining nipples. She shifted, hooking one of her legs over his hip so that almost the entirety of him was cradled against her. She could feel the rigid length of him pressed between her thighs and an almost dizzying thrill swept through her.

"I want you," she breathed, the words escaping her without thought.

Inuyasha's eyes snapped to hers, darkening.

She ground her hips against his, beyond even self-consciousness anymore. She wanted to be as close to him as she would ever get.

The hanyou's eyes fairly rolled back into his head at the motion. He gritted his teeth, struggling for a moment.

"Fuck, Kagome. This ain't gonna last very long if you keep that up," he murmured, resting his forehead against her collar bone.

The hand that had come to rest at the curve of her waist slid slowly down to the waistband of her hakama, hesitating for a handful of moments before pushing past it to her core. Kagome gasped, hips jerking up at even the slight contact.

"Please, Inuyasha."

"Shit," he murmured.

The next few moments were a flurry of motion as Kagome quickly found herself divested of her last shreds of clothing. Inuyasha barely bothered to push his own hakama down further on his hips before settling above her. She could feel him trembling as the thick head of his length came to rest against the slickness of her opening.

Kagome reached down between them, touching him with curious fingers. He cursed under his breath as she explored, surprised at the smooth firmness of him and the roundness of the tip. It was slightly slick at the tip, matching her own slickness, and she shifted her hips until the tip was pressed to her opening.

Inuyasha blinked down at her, disbelief and a feverish sort of joy written across his features. She was certain her own face must be something similar, a happiness blooming in her chest that was almost white hot.

For a moment, they were together.

"Kagome," he murmured, sliding forward.

She bit her lip, feeling more than a slight pinch as she was forced to stretch to accommodate him. Thankfully she was slick enough that it eased a good deal of the discomfort, though for several agonizing moments she was certain something in her might tear.

Inuyasha pushed on slowly, filling her bit by bit until there was nothing left but the deeply satisfying sensation of him inside of her. After several moments he stopped and she realized they were hip to hip, his shaft in her to the hilt. She could feel the head of him pressing against something deep inside of her, connecting them.

He looked down at her, his breathing shallow. He huffed out a breath, a lopsided smile slowly dawning across his face. Not a smirk or a sneer. A smile, like he had seldom allowed himself before.

"Kagome," he breathed, as if he needed to be certain.

Her heart twisted, and she was certain she loved him more in that moment than ever she had before.

She twisted her hips against his, ignoring the slight twinge of pain it caused her.

"Please," she pleaded, needing him not to look at her that way. "Please, Inuyasha."

She felt the length of him twitch inside her at the sound of his name. She said it again and he groaned as if it were the best thing he had ever heard.

Slowly he withdrew, the loss of that feeling of fullness like a blow. She whimpered, the sound turning into a sharp cry as he slid suddenly back into her. The thick tip of him hit that spot inside her with more force and she thought she might pass out. She cried out his name once more, prompting him to withdraw and push back into her with slightly more force.

Kagome wrapped her legs around his hips, deepening each push inside her. She could hear Inuyasha murmuring her name as if in prayer, lowly and repeatedly. As if it were the only word he could remember.

He thrust harder against her as she cried out, her muscles beginning to tighten and coil around him. She could feel the wetness along her thighs as he slid slickly inside her, pressing her hips hard back into the futon beneath her. She met his hips with hers when she could, forcing him deeper inside of her. Her hands clawed for some sort of purchase on his back.

"Inuyasha!"

"Again," he growled.

"Inuyasha, Inuyasha. Inuyasha!"

She was fairly sobbing in pleasure as he pushed against her, his movements growing frantic. Her inner muscles were wrapped tight around him.

His hips twisted, pushing in so deeply that he hit against the swollen nub concealed within her folds. Kagome cried out, that and the sensation of him pressing deep inside her shattering her into pieces. Her back arched, her inner muscles clamping down hard around him.

Inuyasha grunted, burying himself to the hilt once more as he spilled his seed into her. His hips jerked spasmodically against hers, pressing as deeply as he could go.

"Fuck! Kagome, Kagome, Kagome…"

Kagome felt warmth filling her, her muscles twitching. She pressed herself closely to him with her entire body, stretching out the blissful sensation for as long as she could.

Slowly she began to relax, the sharpness of the pleasure easing into an enveloping warmth that left her feeling as if she were floating. Inuyasha made no move to withdraw, eyes sliding open to meet hers as he panted above her. His face was faintly red from the strain, and she found herself grinning stupidly at the sight.

His eyes searched her face, uncertainty and incredulous joy dawning across his features.

"Are you…okay?" he managed to rasp after a moment. "Was it…?"

"Perfect," Kagome replied. "It was perfect, Inuyasha."

A small laugh escaped him, disbelief and happiness fighting for precedence in his face. His head came down to rest in the crook of her shoulder, his body pressing more closely to hers.

"Kagome," he muttered. "Kagome…I…this…I didn't mean to…Fuck. I just-I just want…"

"Shhh," Kagome soothed, stroking the back of his neck with her hand. "I know. I understand."

This had been a whim. A stray impulse, born of a moment of weakness and strain. Of course she knew, but she also knew that to hear him speak the words aloud now might destroy her.

Inuyasha shifted, tucking her closely to his side. For some time his hands continued to roam across her skin as they lay in the deepening darkness of the room, as if he could remember every line by feel alone. Kagome savored the sensation, committing every bit of it to memory.

When at last the hanyou settled into a peaceful sleep, she disentangled herself from his arms and dressed. She left his chambers without so much as a glance backwards, managing to put on a wooden smile and some semblance of her usual manner as she passed the guards, their blithe looks and bows telling her she was safe on at least that front.

Reaching her room in her residence at last, she dashed the tears away as they fell hotly down her cheeks.

She did not regret it. It would never happen again.


	30. Of a Boy and a Bond

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mini history lesson for today:
> 
> -fertility beliefs in the Heian period: It was difficult to find too many articles about fertility beliefs in the Heian period, but the little I did find in my research suggested that, like most cultures before the advent of modern medicine, they did not have the clearest idea of the cause and effect relationship between intercourse and pregnancy. They were, of course, aware that intercourse was involved in the process, however such things as fertility rituals like prayers and offerings to the kami were also believed to be integral to the process.
> 
> -sitting seiza: You've likely seen this happen in anime/manga before, but it's basically just a very formal sitting position in Japan. It's also extremely uncomfortable if you ever attempt to do it for an extended period of time, so it's often used to show seriousness or commitment.

It was difficult to breathe.

Kagome crashed into consciousness abruptly, her mind registering nothing save an urgent need for air. She bolted up, blinking for several long moments and breathing heavily.

Dazedly she took in her surroundings, realizing that it had been the press of her futon against her nose and mouth that had been smothering her as she slept. She wondered why she had fallen asleep atop her futon rather than tucked within it.

For that matter, why had she not bothered to put on a sleeping yukata before retiring for the night? Her robes were in an awful disarray, bunched and wrinkled and untucked. She was missing her chest bindings entirely-

Kagome froze.

The events of the previous night swept over her like a wave. For a moment she had trouble catching her breath.

What had she been thinking? Had she been possessed? She had been thoughtless, rash, ridiculously irresponsible-

She forced herself to take a deep breath, smoothing back her hair with both hands.

What had she been thinking? Not much beyond the feel of Inuyasha's hands and how much she wanted just one thing of her own, just one part of him that she could keep for herself. She had most certainly gotten that.

Kagome felt a warm flush beyond that of mere embarrassment suffusing her. She and Inuyasha had…

She could scarcely bring herself to finish the thought. She could, however, remember the look on Inuyasha's face as it hovered just above her own. The feel of his frame, all corded muscle, moving against hers.

Strangely enough this line of thought calmed her somewhat. She had been with Inuyasha. Whatever might come next, that could not be taken from her.

She had been selfish. She did not regret it.

"O-Miko-sama?" a soft voice called from just beyond the shoji to her chamber.

Kagome jumped slightly. Her eyes slid from the outline of the slight figure kneeling outside of the shoji to the high window across from her. The faint light of morning was only just beginning to color the sky.

Kagome frowned. She was in the habit of rising early on her own, but on the few mornings that she did choose to sleep later the servants rarely came to wake her at this hour.

"O-Miko-sama?" the voice called hesitantly again.

"Yes?" Kagome forced herself to respond.

"The Tennō-sama is here," the servant spoke, relief coloring her tone at Kagome's response. "His Majesty is requesting that you share breakfast in your chambers."

Kagome went cold.

Inuyasha.

Her earlier panic was back in full force. Perhaps she did not regret what she had done, but she had not been the only one who had done it.

What had driven Inuyasha to pursue her…she had not allowed herself to think much about it. He had wanted her and she had wanted him and that had been the extent of what she had allowed herself to consider.

But how to face him now?

Surely it had merely been an impulse that he had lost control of. They were both under a great deal of stress with all that was going on in and around the court and on top of that he had recently lost Kikyou. Under such circumstances it was not difficult to imagine that someone might be driven to a moment of madness, and men of the court were notorious for following their lusts wantonly.

…but when had Inuyasha ever been like any other man of the court? Like any other man at all? Her own reasoning rang hollow to her.

"O-Miko-sama?" the servant called tentatively.

Kagome shook herself. She was overthinking this. Sooner or later she would have to face him. Better that she accept that it had merely been a wayward impulse on his part and move forward.

"I will require a moment to ready myself," she called. "Please inform his Majesty."

"Of course, O-Miko-sama," the servant replied. "Will you require someone to assist you?"

Kagome glanced down at herself. Her robes were a mess, her chest bindings missing entirely, and there was a mark or two in the hollow between her neck and shoulder that she was certain would not go unnoticed.

"No, that will not be necessary," she replied. "I will call when I am ready."

She watched as the outline of the figure bowed, rose, and scurried off down the hallway. She rose, hurriedly shedding the remnants of her rumpled clothes. She wanted to distance herself from the happenings of the previous night as much as possible. She needed to if she was going to face him with any semblance of equilibrium.

Kagome rewrapped her chest in fresh bindings, careful to tighten them enough that her already modest breasts were practically indistinguishable. She then slipped on a fresh under robe, haori, and hakama. She tied the sash tight, tugging and adjusting until scarcely a glimpse of flesh was visible.

She ran a comb quickly through her hair, tying it back neatly at the nape of her neck. After a brief survey of her room, she tidied her futon and pushed it off into a corner. The room was not exactly neat, but he was the one insisting on her chamber as a meeting place.

She smoothed her hands down the front of her robes one last time, taking a deep breath before moving toward the shoji. She slid it open, calling softly down the hall to draw the attention of one of the servants. She instructed the servant to inform the Tennō that she was ready to receive him before returning to her room.

Kagome knelt down, bracing herself as she folded her hands in her lap. She could do this. She had made her decision. She did not regret it.

The clatter of the shoji on its hinges froze her, her eyes fixed on her lap. The faint creaking of tatami beneath his feet might as well have been thunder to her ears. She could feel the blood rushing to her face.

The shoji clattered shut once more and there was silence. Kagome willed herself to lift her head, to meet his eyes as she normally would. She could not.

The silence was deafening.

"You…left early."

The words, lame as they were, broke the tension, and Kagome released a breath she had not been aware she was holding.

"I was tired," she said softly. "I wanted to rest."

"…Oh."

The word was small, filled with an uncertainty that was rare for him. She heard him step forward hesitantly, heard the rustle of his robes as he knelt down near her.

Kagome tensed, praying he would not move to touch her. She could not bring herself to move away.

"Are you…alright?" he asked.

At last she managed to lift her gaze, the concern in his voice catching her.

"I'm fine," she said softly.

The uncertainty in his face made him look younger than his years. Everything in his posture strained towards her, though he did not make any further moves to reach for her. Kagome's heart ached.

"You left," he repeated.

Kagome bit her lip, swallowing back a rush of feeling. How had she ever thought that this would be easy?

"Please sit," she said, gesturing to the spot across from her.

"Kagome…"

"Please."

Inuyasha hesitated a moment before taking a seat. He knelt across from her, close enough to touch even as he was careful not to. His hands were clenched tight in his lap.

"I don't…get it."

The words were like a blow. Kagome shut her eyes against them, willing herself not to crack. He was confused. She simply needed to make things clear for him.

"Last night," she began, fighting to keep from choking on the words. "Please forget it."

She could not meet his eyes. The silence that followed had enough weight to press down her shoulders.

"Kagome…"

The word was faintly choked. A hand fell upon hers, reaching. Kagome winced, hastily withdrawing her hand. The flesh there felt as if it were burning.

"It was foolish of me," she forced the words out, terrified of what he might say if she did not fill the silence. "A whim on both our parts. We're both under a great deal of strain. And you don't have to feel responsible at all. It was…it was my choice, as well. A foolish choice, as I've already said. We'll just…we just need to forget."

"Kagome..."

He did not try to touch her this time.

"You…You want me to just forget?"

Kagome wanted to curl in on herself, to cover her ears. Surely it could not mean so much to him. It had been a whim. Nothing but a whim, born of frustration and perhaps loneliness.

"As I said, you need not feel responsible," she said with a firmness she did not feel. "You need not think you owe me anything. You do not. Besides, neither of us are foolish enough to forget about Fujiwara-sama."

Even as she spoke the name Kagome knew it was a low blow. Inuyasha's estranged former wife-or was it still current wife?-had been a subject that was almost entirely taboo between them. Somehow it steadied her to say the name aloud, though. Inuyasha must miss Kikyou terribly. She has simply been the one who was there. It was bracing, like walking head on into a freezing wind.

Judging by the way that Inuyasha flinched, she guessed his feelings ran along the same lines. She watched from beneath the fringe of her lashes as some of the color drained from the hanyou's face.

The moment of realization. The moment he understood what she already knew so well-that he was merely misdirecting his feelings. It should not have hurt so much as it did.

"You see," she said, her voice far smaller than she had intended it to be. "It was a mistake. No one will hold it against you. Simply forget it."

She rose, unable to force herself to be still any longer. She moved swiftly to the shoji, catching sight of the hanyou's motionless form only out of the corner of her eye as she went.

"Pardon me," she murmured, her hand already sliding the shoji open. "I have things that I need to attend to."

She slid the shoji closed behind her, hurrying down the hallway. She narrowly avoided barreling into a servant carrying a tray filled with small breakfast dishes.

"O-Miko-sama?" the woman said, blinking as she rebalanced the tray on her arm. "Will you not be needing breakfast? His Majesty was adamant that you should eat well this morning to keep up your strength."

It was a struggle to keep her expression neutral.

"His Majesty was mistaken," she said. "Breakfast will not be necessary."

The woman looked quizzical, but Kagome did not have the patience to deal with any further inquiry. She swept past the woman down the hall, not at all certain where she was going.

* * *

She ended up wandering for some time, the movement and the slightly brisk air of early morning serving to calm her enough that she could think clearly.

Curled up in the sheltering roots of the Goshinboku, she reaffirmed to herself that she did not regret what she had done. Once the agitation of her encounter with the hanyou that morning had cooled, she could remember the feel of his arms and the look on his face as he moved above her. The genuine affection that was there, directed entirely at her for a moment.

Perhaps his confusion over Kikyou's betrayal and his frustration over matters of the court had driven him to her, but in those moments that they were connected she had seen affirmed his care for her.

If there was one thing that she did regret, it was failing to consider Inuyasha's feelings in the matter. Inuyasha was a man of honor if ever there was one. Of course he could not touch a woman without feeling that he owed more to her, even if his actions were mere impulse and his feelings were elsewhere.

He still loved Kikyou. She did not doubt it. She could not doubt it.

Kagome simply needed to make sure that he believed her actions that night to be as much a matter of impulse as his had been. Once they were both clear on the matter, surely they could move past it and resume their usual relations.

Once she had thoroughly sorted herself out, she decided it would be best to resume her walk about the court. Since her near death experience and the events that had followed she had not found a chance to go out amongst the courtiers to gauge their mood. Now seemed as good a time as any, with all of the restrictions upon her having been lifted and the chances of Inuyasha seeking her out slim.

She gathered a guard from the Dairi and chose her route carefully, heading first toward the clan residence of the main branch of the Minamoto. With scarcely any prompting she was invited by wife of the headman of the Minamoto to join her for a light meal. Kagome agreed, though she had little appetite.

What came next she had not anticipated.

She found herself seated at the head of a long table, almost every available bit of the space at the table filled by people that she recognized vaguely to be heads of minor clans. The light meal was proving to be anything but.

It seemed as if every eye in the room was upon her as a servant poured her tea. Kagome fixed her eyes on the steam curling up from her mug as the servant moved away, realizing exactly what this was.

She was being sized up yet again. Kikyou had departed abruptly, taking with her the Minamoto's hope of having a human close to the throne. They needed another human in a position of power to fill that gap.

They also needed to see her in the wake of her encounter with Amatersu. Much of the court had been witness to that incident. Surely speculation had spread like wildfire through the court, especially after she had been hidden away in the wake of it.

They needed to see for themselves some spark of divinity.

Things were uncertain in Kikyou's wake. Could the Tennō not keep even his own consort? And what was a ruler without his right hand? Many had been leaning towards support of Inuyasha, this Kagome knew. He had proven himself powerful, his father's true heir. They had believed him divinely guided and approved, her own actions taken as proof. Now they held their breath, watching and waiting to see what would come next.

Kagome wondered if perhaps this outing had been a bit premature on her part.

She drew a deep breath, lifting her eyes.

She straightened her shoulders, mimicking the graceful mien of the Empress that had once filled her with such a mix of admiration and envy.

If she needed to be both right and left hand, so be it.

With deliberate slowness she cupped the steaming mug of tea, bringing it to her lips. It gave her a moment longer to collect herself, but it was also gratifying to see several of the courtiers follow her lead.

She set the mug down once more, adjusting it so that the ceramic design faced just the proper angle.

"I thank you, cousins, for both your courtesy in welcoming me and your patience with me of late," she spoke at last, choosing her term of address deliberately.

She could see the confusion that flitted across some of their faces, slight outrage in a few. The majority accepted it with a naturalness that once would have seemed absurd to her.

"As you are all well aware, the past several days have seen great change within the court," she continued.

"If by change you mean chaos, then yes, quite a bit of change," a man broke in.

Kagome looked to him, thrown by the interruption. He met her gaze levelly, challenge in the hard set of his jaw.

"There has been a great deal of talk and action of late in regards to the people outside of this court," the man pressed on. "And no one is so blind as not to see what you and his Majesty have worked so hard to conceal."

"You disappear from the court for months on a mission to survey the residences outside of the court? And at the same time a great deal of the stored goods of the court are appropriated by his Majesty for some undisclosed reason? Your return to the court prompts the flight of the newly crowned Empress? Prompts her to go so far as even to attempt to have you killed? Her Majesty knew. She stood for the people of this court."

"You, however, O-Miko-sama, think us your enemies, do you not? You have made no secret of your desire to raise up the people from whom you came. Will you raise them up to destroy us? If Amaterasu-sama is a kami who cares nothing for order, who will give over some of her children in favor of others, then I am no adherent of hers!"

Kagome could do little more than stare at the man, her mind turning rapidly as she attempted to process the stream of accusations that had just been hurled at her. She had driven out the Empress? She was conspiring to raise the villagers up against the courtiers? And she positively squirmed at the implication that she and Inuyasha were...involved in some unseemly manner.

Did they all feel this way? She searched the other faces at the table. In many there was a clear distaste for the man's undisguised attack on her, but there was some similarity of sentiment in some. With a sudden chill she realized that many of them might indeed believe some, if not all, of what the man had spoken.

They looked to her now to confirm either their fears or their hopes.

Kagome lowered her eyes, her mind working furiously. She folded her hands tightly, forcing herself to take a breath and think before blurting anything out. Words were all that she had right now.

"Were it true that Amaterasu-sama cared only for some of her children and not others, then I would not be an adherent of hers either, cousin," she spoke slowly. "But I think you misunderstand. I will not-I cannot deny that I once thought the entire court my enemy, and that I have often since viewed myself in opposition to it."

She paused, bracing herself against the looks of outrage that naturally followed such a statement. She could feel the rightness of her own words, though, the truth of them, and she pressed on.

"But you need to be truthful, as well. Did you not often see the villages and I as your enemies in turn? That is, when you bothered to think of us at all. For a long time you had no qualms with Amaterasu-sama, when you thought that it was only you she cared for above them. Why now do you lose faith?"

She paused, turning her gaze to meet each one of theirs in turn. Some toyed with fans, avoiding her eyes. Others attempted to meet her gaze before theirs slid away. Some met her look, their expressions mixtures of guilt and defiance.

"What is it that you think that they want?" Kagome said. "It is not your power. It is not your positions. Most of them do not dream beyond survival. They want food and shelter and safety for their children. And I want that for them, as well, but not at your expense. Not at anyone's expense."

The man who had first spoken eyed her, his expression hard with distrust.

"Has not the Tennō-sama been attentive to your needs?" Kagome asked. "His Majesty has walked the streets of the court, listening to every complaint you have brought before him. His Majesty protected the court when youkai hordes threatened it-he made certain that you and your children would be safe in times to come. Was not the former Tennō-sama, may his soul inhabit peaceful places, a good ruler to you? His Majesty would not have been chosen to rule had not his honorable father thought him worthy."

"And what of the land his Majesty now takes from us?" a woman to her left spoke with icy softness. "What of the restrictions placed on our movements inside and outside of the court?"

Kagome frowned.

"His Majesty may have your best interests in mind and wish for your well being, but that is a thing apart from being a fool," she returned. "Not a one of you can sit here and tell me with any truth that you have forgotten the throne war. Not a one of you can say that you have supported his Majesty wholeheartedly in his reign."

The table fell silent. Some had the decency to look shamefaced. In others there was no remorse.

"My place is not to condemn you," Kagome continued more gently. "The right path is seldom the one that appears surest. You have had doubts about his Majesty. You have acted on those doubts. If you would correct yourselves now, look at his Majesty with clear eyes. See his Majesty's actions for what they are and then judge him if you will."

Silence met her words and none would meet her gaze. She could see plainly that it was not enough.

These were not people of faith. They needed something tangible, something more than mere promises.

"What would you say to a trade of good faith?" Kagome said.

Several sets of eyes warmed with interest.

"Trade?" her hostess echoed.

"A promise of sorts," Kagome said. "I will request that his Majesty lift the restrictions on your movements. I will also request that his Majesty speak directly with the clan heads, in addition to the Council, whenever his Majesty needs to appropriate any goods from you. You will be kept fully informed of his Majesty's plans."

All eyes were on her now. Kagome drew herself up, hoping she looked more certain than she felt.

"In return," she said. "His Majesty and I will request your sons and daughters."

There was a moment of deep silence before several voices broke into a confused chorus of questions. Kagome did not respond, but allowed them several moments to give voice to their concerns.

"A moment if you will, cousins," she said. "There is precedent for this. Did not the Tennō-sama and the Empress once choose from among the clans' sons and daughters to be brought into the Dairi?"

Sango had mentioned it to her once while they were on their mission outside of the court and the thought had been simmering in the back of her mind ever since. It was a bit spur of the moment, perhaps rash of her to introduce the idea so suddenly now, but there was truth in what they had accused her of. She had viewed-and to some extent still did view-the courtiers as her enemies. But what sort of peace could they create for anybody in a world where some of its people were treated as mere hindrances?

If she were going to come to any sort of understanding with the courtiers, it had to start now.

"You mean his Majesty wishes to reinstate the appointments?" her hostess said.

Kagome nodded, keeping to herself the fact that she had not actually brought the issue up with Inuyasha as of yet. That was a matter to be dealt with later.

"It is high time," she said. "The appointments ceased because the court was in turmoil in the wake of the former Tennō-sama's passing, may his soul inhabit peaceful places. Those dark days have passed. As a sign of the good faith and cooperation amongst us, the appointments need to be resumed."

"Then the firstborn from among our clans-?" a man to her left began.

"No," Kagome broke in. "His Majesty will choose them himself."

Traditionally it would have been the firstborn sons and daughters of the clans that were sent to the Dairi, brought in in the past as a sign of the good relations between the Tennō and the courtiers. The appointments also served to foster good relations between the Tennō and the courtiers in that the Tennō often chose from those among them those who would become members of the Council or his closest personal advisors.

Inuyasha might be more agreeable to reinstating the practice if it were not the firstborns who were sent by default, considering his own history. Beyond that, though, Kagome had seen too much in the court of power given without reason and regardless of merit. If they were going to be choosing potential advisors or Council members, it would not be based solely off of the happenstance of birth order.

The courtiers looked to one another up and down the length of the table, fans twisting in a series of questions. Kagome waited patiently for the hushed conversations to die down.

"If his Majesty will be charged with overseeing our sons, then are we to assume that you will take charge of our daughters, O-Miko-sama?" asked a man halfway down the table on her righthand side.

Kagome nodded.

"That was my intention, yes," she said. "Do you find that agreeable?"

Under normal circumstances it would have been the former or current Empress to take charge of the daughters, according to what Sango had told her. If she was to be both right and left hand, though, this would be yet another duty for her to assume.

"Entirely agreeable," the man spoke, spreading his hands wide in an open gesture. "I simply wished to be certain that it would be you, O-Miko-sama, who will be overseeing his Majesty's future bride and his concubines. I trust, of course, that you will be an impartial observer in the matter."

He met her eyes, his gaze intent on her face for anything it might betray. Kagome struggled to keep her expression neutral, though her mind was sent racing.

Of course. Of course, of course, of course. It only made sense. Why bring women of the court into the Dairi if not to give the Tennō his pick of them? What better way to foster ties between the Tennō and his courtiers than by marriage? Sango had not mentioned it, but she should have had enough sense to work it out for herself.

And with the mess caused by Kikyou's departure and subsequent actions, it was no wonder that the courtiers expected Inuyasha to choose among them for a new wife. He had no other concubines or prospects and there was the matter of ensuring an heir...

Kagome folded her hands tightly, forcing her thoughts to be still. Her pulse thrummed too quickly in her veins and her face felt hot.

There had to be a limit. Surely she could not be expected to go this far. It had been hard enough to stand by and watch Inuyasha with Kikyou during their betrothal. To be asked to choose the woman with whom he would spend the rest of his life...

"There...there are yet matters to be dealt with in the wake of the former Empress'...departure," she hedged weakly.

"But once those matters are dealt with, you will work with his Majesty to select a new bride?" the man pressed.

Kagome's gaze shifted from his face down along the length of the table. The courtiers watched her expectantly. They suspected her of something. If she faltered now much might be lost.

"...Of course."

She felt as if she might choke on the words.

* * *

After the polite formalities of tea, snacks, and meaningless chatter were fulfilled, the courtiers gave their word that they would consider seriously what had been offered and Kagome was allowed to leave at last.

It had most definitely been too soon to attempt something like that. She felt as exhausted as if she had been running around the court all day rather than merely sitting down for tea.

She returned with her guard to her residence in the Dairi soon after. She had initially planned to put in a bit more of an appearance around the court, but after that trial she wanted nothing more than to curl up by herself for a bit.

The servants offered her a meal and tea upon her arrival, but she could scarcely stomach the thought. She begged off and asked to be left on her own to rest for awhile.

In her chambers she curled into a ball atop her futon, not bothering with the blankets. She wanted nothing more than to lay there for a time without thinking about anything, but thoughts crept in without her consent.

She needed to speak to Inuyasha. It had been foolish of her to introduce any of her ideas to the courtiers before talking them through with him first. There was no telling if he would even be amenable to them, though she thought them sound enough.

And how to even introduce the idea of bringing in women to the Dairi for him to pick from? The very thought turned her cold with dread.

He would never stand for it. There was still Kikyou to be thought of, and she knew he would never be done with the Empress. Nor did she wish to dismiss the woman when she still had so many uncertainties of her own, but she could see little way of redeeming Kikyou in the eyes of the court.

Perhaps a note would suffice to tell all that had happened to Inuyasha. They need not actually meet in order to communicate-

No. No, no, no. She had made certain choices knowing full well what the consequences would be. She could not allow those consequences to get in the way of her work with Inuyasha now.

Kagome groaned, snatching the edge of the blanket she lay atop and rolling until it partially covered her.

...her futon was not nearly so nice as his.

* * *

A thought that was half dream startled Kagome into wakefulness not long after she had dozed off. She scrambled out of the tangle of her futon, hurriedly righting her clothes.

She rushed from her residence without so much as a word to the servants or her guard. If Inuyasha were to find out he would likely have a fit, but she could scarcely afford to have them with her for this.

Mid-stride Kagome's thoughts began to catch up with her. She stopped so abruptly that she nearly tripped over her own feet.

She had no idea where she was going.

Kagura had given her a day, but the youkai had said nothing about where or when to find her.

Kagome looked to the sky, her heart sinking slightly as she saw that the veil of dusk was beginning to settle over it. Perhaps it was too late. Perhaps the offer had already expired.

No! She couldn't just let this go without trying. She could try going to the Taira residence-

She threw out that idea before it was even fully formed. The last place Kagura could have wanted to meet her was there.

Then where? Back at the Chūwain? But why there? Why not anywhere else?

Kagome stood rooted, her frame taught with indecision.

A wind swept up, tugging at her hair and the edges of her hakama. Kagome blinked, glancing around her. Nothing else was stirred by the wind.

She followed the pull. The breeze pulled her up and down side streets and through small passageways that she would never have known existed otherwise. For a time she tried to map the route it was taking her, but she soon lost track entirely.

The wind kicked up, pushing her through the small opening between a low wall and a small building. Kagome stumbled, tripping and catching herself hard on her hands.

Thankfully she had landed on a swath of grass. She pushed herself up, stretching her shoulders against the strain of the impact.

She blinked.

There was a small building before her, about the size of a hut in her village though it was smaller than the servants' quarters by the court's standards. The wood of it was warped and cracking, the one shoji door she could see crooked on its hinges. The grass surrounding it was overgrown, tall enough that it threatened to swallow the porch that wrapped the building.

But it was something beyond the ramshackle appearance of the building that struck her. It felt...familiar somehow.

"You look a mess."

Kagome jolted, startled. Kagura emerged from the deep gloom of the porch's overhang, eyeing her with faint distaste.

Kagome rose slowly, brushing grass and dirt from her hands and hakama.

"I apologize," she said. "I was not sure how to find you and-"

"I told you that I would find you when it was time, did I not?" Kagura said. "You really do look put off. You've looked a fool before, but never such a...bumbling fool."

Kagome frowned, but inwardly she had to acknowledge that there was some truth to her words. She had felt more than a bit off balance ever since the night before when-

"I'm fine," she spoke with a bit more vehemence than was necessary. "I just...where are we?

Kagura glanced at the rotting structure, something dark passing over her features.

"The place where I first had my heart stolen," she murmured.

Kagome frowned, not at all certain what to make of this rather cryptic statement. It was almost poetic, though Kagura did not strike her as the type at all.

"Nevermind," the youkai woman spoke abruptly, shaking her head. "What does it matter where we are, so long as we are not found? As pathetic as you look, I cannot afford to risk discovery."

Kagome scowled.

"You promised me something," she said.

Kagura's expression cooled. She nodded.

"One boon," she said. "Choose it wisely."

"I have questions that only you can answer for me, Kagura-sama," she said.

Kagura's look went flat.

"Questions?" she echoed. "I allow you anything and you choose to ask questions?"

Kagome's scowl deepened.

"And what would you do in my place?" she said. "Blindly order you to do something without any idea of what the consequences might be? There is a good deal yet that I don't know, so knowledge is where I have to start. Besides, asking you to do something for me in the court might get you caught and who knows what would happen then? At least information is somewhat safe."

Kagura looked at her for a long moment, brow furrowing faintly. She looked away, shaking her head.

"You would do better to mind your own affairs," she said. "Busying yourself with others will only slow you down."

She stepped down from the crumbling porch with inhuman grace.

"Ask your questions," Kagura said. "I will answer what I can."

It took Kagome no more than an instant to form her question.

"I need to know about the human boy who was brought into your clan years ago," she said. “I need to know about Onigumo.”

Blatant shock lit Kagura's face, crimson eyes going wide. Slowly her lips curled into a smile that Kagome could only describe as soul deep satisfaction.

"It seems that I've chosen the perfect venue, then."

* * *

To hear the tale told by most, it began like many others with the beauty of a woman overpowering the reason of a man.

This, Kagura said, was a lovely twist that courtiers liked to place on their tales. It covered over the fact that this story like many others began and ended with tyranny and greed. A man saw something that he wanted and he had the power to take it, so he did. That thing just so happened to be a woman and that woman just so happened to be defenseless.

It would have been a tale like a hundred others if not for one small matter. The woman had a son, perhaps the only thing she had in the world that was truly her own, and if the son was not brought with her into the court then she threatened to take her own life.

The courtier who wanted her was not in the habit of dragging dirty brats back with him into the court, but what good was a dead mistress?

It did not hurt that she was exceptionally beautiful.

Kagura took little interest in the woman when she was smuggled into the court. The Tennō was no supporter of such dealings, but what his Majesty did not find out would not hurt him and it remained a fairly common practice. The woman was pretty enough for a human, but little more than that.

The brat was something else, though.

Kagura could still recall clearly the first time she had seen him. Filthy, clothed in little more than rags, so thin that the hollows of his cheeks were visible. He should have been a pathetic sight.

But he was not. His eyes were huge and dark with promise as they took in each courtier, measuring. He sat as straight on the back of the horse as if it were his own and not that of the man behind him who had taken him from his home.

Kagura had been surprised not only by her instant fascination with such a maudlin little wretch, but also by the faint fear she had felt curling inside her. It was not until some time later that she would learn that it was an instinct she should have heeded.

The matter of hiding the boy was more complicated than that of hiding his mother. She could be tucked away in one of the quarters most courtiers kept for their mistresses, hidden there among the low ranking women of the court and thus kept from the attention of his Majesty.

Initially they thought to place the boy among the servants. The boy proved to be nothing but a hindrance to the servants, though, refusing any task he was given and often escaping their watch to wander the court.

His mother also proved a problem when she learned that he had been placed there. She threatened her own life once more if he was not properly cared for. If she had to be some man's whore, then at least her son would be well cared for.

Besides this the man who had taken her, the headman of the Taira, seemed to share Kagura's odd fascination with the boy. He was only too ready to take the next step of adopting the boy into the clan as his own.

And so the boy was made a courtier, though he was kept largely in the shadows. After all, they still could not afford to have the entire story discovered.

As a part of his adoption he was renamed Naraku by his new father. But no name change, fine clothes, or court training would ever be enough to gain the boy any measure of acceptance within the court.

Nor did it help that his adoption by the headman placed him in line for an inheritance or a high ranking position within the clan, however unlikely it was that he would actually become the successor. The courtiers shunned him. Some went out of their way to make certain he knew that he would never have a place within the court, barring him from public court functions and at times even making it so that he could not return to the clan residence.

Which brought them to this building. It was no more than a shack really. Originally it had been the hideaway of one of the earliest Empresses, a small place where she could be on her own and keep a little garden. Such small buildings had gone out of fashion in the court not long after her death, and the building soon became no more than a storage shed for other relics that the court had grown tired of.

At some point it must have become Naraku's sanctuary. Perhaps it was because he could scarcely stand to be near courtiers longer than he had to. Perhaps it was because the smallness of the place reminded him of the hut he had once shared with his mother before everything had been taken from them. Perhaps it was because the place was closer to the building in which his mother was kept.

Whatever it might have been, Naraku took up his unofficial residence there. When he was not there Kagura often observed him roaming the court like a shadow, watching with eyes that seemed to see everything. She often suspected he knew more of the court than any courtier would ever know. Still he remained no more than a shadow in their midst.

Until the day his mother died. It was not sudden, nor was it particularly surprising. She held on for a good ten years before she passed. Kagura knew little about what exactly had happened to her save that it was said she had been wasting away since she had arrived. The woman simply lost the will to continue living. It was not an uncommon story. The body was sent off to be disposed of and that was the end of it.

A change overcame Naraku. It was slow, so gradual that it was difficult to notice. But Kagura had been watching since he had first arrived in the court, fascinated despite her better instincts.

It was a shift in energy, perhaps. Something about the essence of the boy was changing day by day. But Kagura could not understand it. And so, for the first time in her very long life, Kagura allowed herself to go against her own instincts.

She followed the boy- now grown into an inarguably appealing man, rivaling in looks his late mother-and he led her to this place. Only in retrospect could she say that he had led her. At the time she had believed that she trailed him in secret. It was not so.

This place then had the same aura it carried now. Otherworldly. Stained somehow. He had simply sat down on the porch, dark eyes hooded as he saw some vision she could not. She wondered how long this had been his retreat.

But for once wondering had not been enough for her. Kagura had found herself stepping forward, out of the shadows. She was not sure what she had thought to do by exposing herself. Perhaps some part of her had always wanted to help him.

There was no trace of surprise in his expression at the sight of her. He merely lifted a hand, beckoning her closer. And she went.

She could scarcely recall what was said between them. She was not entirely certain that anything had been said. There was simply the vague notion that he had somehow conveyed to her that he needed her, that if she had ever wanted to help him then there was no better time than that moment. And she had agreed.

In that moment she learned what had changed in him.

Whatever he was, he was no longer human. He reached into her-reached as if she were no more than air-and took the heart from her chest. He took it into himself, absorbing it. Even in the strange stupor that overcame her in those moments Kagura could see the other youkai pieces within him pulsing a welcome as a piece of her was added.

He had taken her heart from her, made it a part of himself. And she had not been the only one ensnared by him. Many others, those other parts of the thing that he had become, had been caught by him. They belonged to him now.

Not long after this encounter he disappeared for a time from the court. She could not say where he had gone, but there seemed to be another shift in him upon his return. Something had been decided. She understood it without him speaking a word. They were linked now.

Outwardly little changed about him. He was still no more than a shadow, scarcely known or noticed by anyone within the court. But something within the Taira clan itself was shifting. They had never been the most open or welcoming clan by any means, but slowly they began to close in on themselves.

Naraku had long spent a good deal of time in close quarters with the headman. The fascination the headman had felt towards the boy had shifted into a vague guilt upon his mother's death, and perhaps some of it was a fear that he did not entirely understand. At least this was what Naraku suspected and Kagura knew.

Whatever the root of it might have been, the headman indulged many of the young man's requests. A greater number of villagers taken into the ranks of the clan's guard. A little more land taken outside the court here and there. A larger investment in weapons each year. Naraku had great skill in making every request seem merely a suggestion and every suggestion seem utterly reasonable. Practical, even.

And so it was that one fine spring day the pair went out with a large party to hunt outside the court. It was nothing out of the ordinary. They had made the same trip plenty of times before.

Not one among the hunting party was ever to return to the court.

When several days later a search party was sent out to find them, there was little remaining beyond scraps of flesh and bone. It was impossible to distinguish one body from another, but days of combing the surrounding woods did not turn up any survivors.

Naraku died that day.

* * *

Kagome stared at the woman, wide-eyed.

“Onigumo-I mean, Naraku is…he's dead?"

A wry smile turned up one corner of Kagura's lips.

"Yes," she said. "He's dead."

Kagome felt as if something was falling out from beneath her. She had been so certain that following the trail of that unfortunate little boy would get her somewhere. 

"No one mourned him," Kagura continued, though Kagome was scarcely listening. "Scarcely anyone even remembered his existence. He was nothing more than a dark cloud that had once passed over our sun. It was perfect really."

Kagome glanced at her, caught by some strangeness in her voice. Kagura's eyes met hers and there was no hint of a smile on her face now.

"After all, how can a dead man be blamed for anything?" she said. "That's insanity, you know."

Kagome watched her, not daring to interrupt. Kagura's eyes drifted away from hers, dark with some memory.

"Our current headman, Hakudoshi, grew up alongside Naraku," she said. "There was little love lost between the two. After all, even as an adopted son Naraku was a threat to his inheritance. But there was one day when Hakudoshi was gravely injured while riding to the clan's outer residence."

"Luckily for him Naraku was there to save his life, though everyone else had been certain that he was on the brink of death. Hakudoshi must have been thankful to his brother for that, for he carried on many of Naraku’s projects even after he had passed."

Kagura paused, her look darkening further.

"And strangely enough it was not long after that that the Taira began to agitate within the court," she mused. "Small things, really. More land outside the court, greater freedom to trade outside the court, more food delegated to them from storage. Nothing that courtiers had not been whining about for years."

Kagura's eyes swept back to her.

"I think you might know the rest of this story," she said. "One day the Tennō simply disappeared. He was gone as if he had never been, and the court declared him dead soon after because the body cannot survive without a head. What no one could have anticipated was his Majesty's last will- that the half breed, son to a woman who was not even an official concubine, take the throne rather than his first born, who was both a pure-bred youkai and son to the recently deceased Empress. But that was alright. If anything it was better. The court was more than willing to take up arms all on their own over that one."

"What are you saying?"

Kagura frowned slightly.

"If I am going to go to the trouble of telling you all this, the least you could do is pay attention," she said. "You have a mind. Use it."

Kagome frowned. It was difficult to get her mind around the sheer enormity of it.

"You mean to say..." she said slowly. "You mean to say that all of this was planned? Every last bit of it?"

Kagura smiled faintly. She shrugged.

"Some parts more than others," she responded casually. "But yes, for the most part I can trace his path over time. For the most part I believe he has had everything in hand."

"Then now," Kagome said. "What is it that he wants now? What is it that he's doing now?"

Kagura gave another small shrug.

"Hard to say," she said. "It has been far more difficult to understand what he is doing since he left the court. He does not exactly bother to keep me informed, beyond the...small errands he  
demands of me from time to time. I know he has been regrouping since the throne war subsided. I suppose he means to take the throne for himself some day. Something like that would suit him."

"And I know that there's something he wants from you, something he discovered years ago but that slipped through his hands. He thinks it key to fulfilling his ambitions. He will do whatever he can to take it from you."

Kagome fought the urge to touch the spot on her hip. He knew about the jewel. Somehow he knew that she had it, as well.

"Then you cannot say with any certainty what he is doing now?" she pressed.

"No," Kagura replied. "Not unless he chooses to tell me. He often gives orders but seldom gives reasons. It is not his nature."

Kagome was silent. After a moment she nodded.

"Thank you," she said, meeting the woman's eyes. "I…thank you for this."

Kagura met her gratitude with an impassive look.

"Do not thank me," she said. "I repaid a debt. Now I do not have to feel that I owe you in the times to come."

Kagome frowned, a thought occurring to her.

"What will happen to you after this?" she said. "Will he know that you spoke to me?"

Kagura's gaze slid away from hers, her eyes hooded. She eyed the crumbling hut for a long moment before shaking her head.

"Who knows?" she said. "Perhaps he will. Perhaps he will choose to destroy me for it. If so, then fine. At least I chose this. It's been far too long since I last chose something."

"Kagura..." Kagome said, her stomach knotting slightly at the thought. "If there is anything I can do to help you, I promise-"

Kagura turned a wry look on her, pursing her lips.

"Worry about yourself, miko," she said. "It is high time that I took my life back into my own hands."

* * *

They parted without so much as a farewell. Kagome watched as the youkai woman disappeared in a swirl of wind, hoping for the first time since she had met her that she would see her again.

Despite Kagura's disdain for her concern, it was difficult not to worry what might befall the woman should anyone in her clan learn of what she had done. After all, it was clear now that Kagura was as much a victim in all of this as so many others.

Kagome sighed. There was not much for it. The best she could do for now was to find a way to stop Naraku. The sooner she did, the sooner Kagura would be safe and free of his grasp.

After all that she had heard, though, she found that there was a strange part of her that was sympathetic with the little boy who had been dragged into the court. He had been ripped from his home, torn from his mother, and dropped into a world he did not understand and where no one had any interest in understanding him. Had he really had any chance?

But he had chosen what he had become. She could not forget that. She could not absolve him of responsibility for the lives that he had chosen to ruin. Miroku's father, Inuyasha's father and mother, Sango's brother, Kagura, and who knew how many others.

What was it that he hoped for in all this? Did he want the throne? It made sense. What greater balm was there to a life of ostracism than control over those who had tormented him?

And somehow he had learned about the jewel. The armies of the Taira alone had not been enough to take what he wanted, but the jewel would be. He needed it to ensure victory. 

She touched her hip absently, wondering if there was any suitable way of disposing of the jewel. If she could only think of some wish…

Kagome shook her head. She did not trust herself with such power. In such circumstances as she currently found herself she did not think it would be possible to make a wish that did not better her on some level. Better to leave it be until she could think of something else.

She thought of going to Inuyasha as soon as she parted from Kagura to tell him everything she had just been told. Surely it would relieve some of the pressure in her head, some of the churning of her thoughts. Confiding in him and hearing his thoughts would ease her mind.

But there was her last conversation with him. And the conversation they needed to have about how to proceed from here in regards to Kikyou and the idea of him...remarrying. And so many other small things that she knew should not have been her excuse not to go to him immediately.

In the end Kagome returned to her residence, feeling slightly defeated despite what should have been no small victory.

It should not have been this way, though. There was the nagging feeling that she was slowly losing hold of something very important.

* * *

The following morning Kagome woke with a strange clarity about what she needed to do. She could not recall if she had dreamt or even thought about it before dozing off that night, but there was certainty in her movements as she prepared to go out.

Absently she touched the sun scar on her shoulder.

She drew more stares than she would have liked as she walked the streets of the court that morning. It was not difficult to understand why, though. Between her recent return from the brink of death to the conversation with the courtiers she had had the previous day that had surely spread like wildfire, it was no great wonder. She held her head high amidst her guard, meeting their looks with feigned certainty.

The Chūwain did have a scattering of early morning visitors, but she was able to slip around them unnoticed without going too far out of her way. Sneaking around with a guard, though, was probably one of the more ridiculous things she had done, she reflected.

Kagome also had to decide what to do with them when she reached the west wing of the complex. Neither of her two lead guards would stand for being left outside the barrier-they were still slightly shame-faced at having had her snatched out from under their watch mere days ago, though they appeared to have received some sort of satisfactory explanation for it-and in the end she relented. She did not need them going to Inuyasha, after all. In turn they agreed to wait just down the hall for her.

She slid the shoji door open purposefully. She had a lot of what she had needed to know before. Now she just needed a few more pieces.

Sesshoumaru glanced at her from his place beside a low window that looked out through the barrier towards the front of the Chūwain. His look sharpened for an instant before sliding away from her.

"Good morning, Sesshoumaru-sama," she said.

He did not return the nicety.

"I need to speak with you about something very important," she pressed on.

"Do you think to hold the wind witch against me?" he spoke suddenly.

Kagome frowned. He still was not looking at her, but there was tension in his frame. Slight, but enough.

"I have no interest in discussing Kagura-sama," she said. "I brought her here because I felt inclined to. I owe you no more explanation of the matter than you owe me."

Sesshoumaru turned his head, eyeing her for a long moment. He turned away, his face a cold mask.

"Humans are weak," he said idly, as if he were not speaking to her at all. "To cover that weakness they will use whatever means necessary, however petty."

Kagome scowled, catching the implication clearly enough. She knelt down on the tatami across from him, sitting seiza with her back ramrod straight.

"Physically I will never be as strong as you, Sesshoumaru-sama," she said. "There are certain limits that I must accept. But I have strength of my own. And I do not think that giving it my all, using every strength I have, is wrong. That is what humans are. Your father knew it. If you are too blind to see it then I pity you."

His eyes narrowed at the mention of his father. Kagome knew she had to press on.

"I did not know your honorable father, but there are a few things that I do know about him," she said. "I know that he should still be alive. If you knew who had killed him, what would you do, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

He turned to her fully, eyes sharp. Now she had his attention.

"What right have you to speak of my father, human?" he spoke lowly.

Kagome felt a chill run the length of her. The sound of his voice was the same as the feel of a sword pressed to her throat. With awful clarity she understood that he would kill her if she pushed him too far, regardless of the consequences.

She pressed a hand to her stomach, steadying herself. She had to push too far.

"The right that comes of wanting to preserve his kingdom and protect his legacy," she said. "The right that comes of wanting to avenge his wrongful death. The right that comes of wanting to do what is right."

"Your father was deceived and murdered by a man who wanted to take his throne. Kagura-sama was deceived by that same man and is forced now to do his bidding. The man is not done. He will not stop until he is forced to. He will take your father's throne. He will do as he pleases with Kagura-sama. My question is will you do anything about it or will you flee to China once more?"

The feeling was one of almost floating, he lifted her by her throat with such ease. She could feel the poison glow of youki threatening the delicate flesh of her throat.

His features shifted strangely as she met his look, the beast hidden just beneath the beautiful facade pushing to the fore. Red bled into the corners of his eyes.

"Worm," he snarled.

"Coward," she breathed.

She winced, biting back a yelp. His grip did not ease.

"How can you know any of what you claim?" he said.

How could she know it when he did not was what he surely meant. How could she know more of his father and his lover than he did?

"I stumbled on your father's grave," she said. "Kagura-sama chose to tell me the rest. I have been putting fragments together for months."

His eyes bored into hers for long moments.

He released her. Kagome fought to keep from sagging against the wall, lifting her chin to meet his eyes. Sesshoumaru turned from her.

"Leave," he said, his tone cooling once more.

Kagome watched his back, uncertain. Was he choosing to dismiss her after all that? 

"This Sesshoumaru will not repeat himself," he spoke. "This Sesshoumaru will summon you when you are required."

Kagome blinked. She smiled faintly.

"Do not take too long, Sesshoumaru-sama," she said. "I will take care of matters with or without your help."

He turned a chilling look on her as she slid the shoji closed behind her. He had asked her to leave, after all.

* * *

Kagome returned to her residence hoping for a quiet meal and a bit of time to reflect on all that she now knew.

She did not anticipate, however, being waylaid by some of the servants upon her arrival. They informed her that his Majesty was there waiting for her in a wing of the residence that she had only ever heard mentioned before.

Kagome experienced a stab of panic. She had had no time to prepare. She wasn't ready to see him.

But the servants were already guiding her forward toward her chamber. They were an efficient blur all about her as her mind reeled.

As soon as she was presentable the women were moving her once more. Kagome fought the urge to dig in her heels like a petulant child, to whine and stomp and refuse to leave her room. She was an adult and had to act as such, however much her stomach was churning. Besides, she doubted that hiding under the covers would do her as much good now as it had as a child.

The building he awaited her in was in a wing disconnected from the rest of the residence. Perfect for yelling if he did not want to be overheard. Kagome bit her lip.

The servants left her on the steps of the building, scattering as if they had never been. Kagome stood frozen, unable to move without them to propel her forward.

For a moment she imagined simply turning around and walking away. They did not have to do this-whatever this was- right now. It could be later. Much later.

She sighed. Would running away make him any less angry the next time they met? Every time she put this off the thought of having to meet with him got a little bit harder.

Now. It had to be now. Kagome took a deep breath and forced herself forward.

The room was dim despite the light outside. Few windows were present to allow any light in.

Consequently she could scarcely make out the figure of the hanyou seated in the furthest corner of the room. Once her eyes did adjust, though, it was not difficult to see the barely leashed anger in his posture. His back was ramrod straight, his eyes bright as they focused on some tiny facet of the wall.

The only indication he gave of any awareness of her presence was the swivel of one ear towards her as she crossed the threshold. She could almost hear his teeth clench from where she stood.

Kagome groped for words. Perhaps if she could just say the right thing then this whole situation could be diffused before-

"Where were you?"

The words, low and rough as jagged stones, made her wince.

"...With Sesshoumaru-sama," she said reluctantly. "I had a question that I hoped that he would have the answer to. My guard was with me the entire time."

She hoped the latter would lessen the bite of the former. Inuyasha was silent.

"I don't want you going there," he spoke at last. "I don't want you anywhere near there."

"Inuyasha-"

"I'm ordering you!"

Kagome's eyes went wide. She felt her temper flare to meet his.

"Ordering?" she snapped. "There are many things that I'll do for you, Inuyasha, but being bullied out of helping you isn't one of them! And if you called me out here simply to throw your weight around then consider this meeting over!"

"Kagome!" he called as she turned to go.

She paused, though the anger burning in her limbs urged her to go.

"Wait," he said. "Just wait...please."

The 'please' was added as almost a reluctant afterthought, but it was unusual enough that she turned to look at him. He was standing, though he had not moved any closer to her. Much of the hard anger had gone from his features, replaced by a mixture of contrition and...was it pain that she saw there?

"I don't…" he said. "That's…that's not what I meant."

Against her will she felt her ire cool a notch. She turned fully to face him.

"Then what did you mean?" she asked.

"I…" he hesitated, his eyes fixed on the floor between them. "I…about before…I never meant to…I just wanted…"

He trailed off, unable to make clear the jumble of his own thoughts. Kagome could see where he was going clearly enough from his reluctance, though, and she had not the slightest interest in going down that path with him.

"Inuyasha," she said, forestalling whatever might come next. "I have some very important things that I need to tell you. A great many things have happened in the last few days."

He glanced up at her. Relief and disappointment joined the shadows moving across his face.

"What?" he said.

"I met with some of the courtiers of the Minamoto clan," she said, deciding to start with the least of her news and work forward. "Well, initially it was only meant to be the courtiers of the Minamoto. It turned into something quite a bit…larger, to say the least."

"Did they gang up on you?" Inuyasha asked, relaxing somewhat with his own talk having been forestalled.

Kagome shrugged slightly, spreading her hands.

"I suppose so," she said. "Though it wasn't as bad as it could have been."

Inuyasha nodded as if this was a foregone conclusion.

"What did they want?" he asked.

"I'm not entirely certain," Kagome said. "To test me, maybe. To see what I thought of them. To see how we plan to treat them."

Inuyasha raised a brow, a silent signal to continue.

"They accused me of seeing them as enemies and wanting to limit them," Kagome explained. "They weren't exactly wrong."

Inuyasha snorted.

"No fucking kidding," he huffed. "When have they ever acted like anything but our enemies?"

"Not all of them," Kagome said, frowning. "And part of the problem might be that we've treated them that way. The more that we try to fight them, the more they will struggle back. And what sort of peace can we hope to create by suppressing them? Sooner or later they will rise up. Whatever has happened in the past, the courtiers are the children of the kami, as well. We both need to start treating them as such."

Inuyasha looked highly skeptical, but made no comment on this. He crossed his arms over his chest.

"So?" he said.

"So I…promised them some things," Kagome said, her gaze skittering away from his. "In return for some promises of their own. I promised them that we would keep them informed when we need to appropriate things from them, to tell them what we're doing. And to further cooperation between us we all agreed that the appointments should be resumed. We agreed that-"

Kagome stopped abruptly, realizing that she had come to exactly the reason she had avoided this conversation in the first place. A cold, hard knot twisted in the pit of her stomach as she realized she could not skirt the issue. Her hands balled tight at her sides.

"That you would choose among the sons and daughters, rather than defaulting to the first borns," she continued faintly. "They will come into the Dairi as a sign of good faith between us. You will be in charge of the sons, of course. They…they expect me to take charge of the daughters. And when you're ready, of course…"

She was choking on the words. She swallowed back the lump in her throat.

"When you're ready you'll choose a bride from among them, to link us all together. Concubines, as well, if you wish. I know your feelings towards Kikyou-sama, I-I know this is likely the last thing you want, but we have to think ahead to the future and I know that you have already decided that what is best for Kikyou-sama is to keep her safe in her residence-"

"Are you fucking kidding me?!"

Kagome braced herself against the anger she could feel radiating off of him. Somehow it was almost easier in the face of his rage.

"I know how you must feel," she forced out. "But you have to think of your duty to-!"

"My duty?" he spat. "My duty?! What fucking duty, Kagome? How…how the fuck can you even-after we-?"

"Yes, your duty!" Kagome snapped back, finally able to lift her eyes to meet his. "Your duty to the court! Your duty to the people of this nation! Can you forget them so easily simply because you do not wish to choose another wife?! You have to think of your duty, Inuyasha, the same way that I think of mine every day-!"

The words choked off abruptly, caught in her throat. To her horror and surprise she felt tears welling in her eyes, clogging her throat. She attempted to swallow them back, but her eyes only burned more fiercely.

"You think I want to do this?" she murmured, the first of the tears spilling over. "Do you think that there is any part of me that wants to pick the woman that you'll marry and spend your life with and have children with? You know my feelings, Inuyasha. You've long known my feelings. So have some pity…"

"Feelings?"

Kagome blinked, dashing away the dampness on her cheeks with the back of one hand.

Inuyasha looked to her and she could see the anger draining from his features. It was replaced by something searching, golden eyes large in the darkness as they met hers. There was something like hope there.

"You said…I thought that you didn't…anymore…"

Kagome was silent. Inuyasha took a half step towards her, then halted abruptly as if he had to force himself.

"Nothing's changed. Nothing's ever going to change."

"Kagome."

In the space of a heartbeat his arms were around her and his lips were against hers.

It was a relief. It was such a relief to feel him again. She had not even realized she missed the sensation of it until this moment. She nearly sagged against him, seeking out his solidity.

But there was a twinge in the back of her mind. She had fallen into this once and promised herself that it would never happen again. She could not afford to let it happen again.

Kagome forced herself away, breathing harder than she should have been. Inuyasha moved to follow her, but she held up her hand.

"Wait," she said, feeling almost dizzy. "Just…"

"I need you," he said, meeting her eyes. "I need you with me, Kagome.”

If ever Kagome had felt dumbstruck in her life, she felt it in that moment. There was no reason in the face of those words. There was nothing but a joy and a fear so deep that she was certain it would swallow her.

Because if he needed her she could not say no. Because she felt no desire to refuse him or push him away. Because she would give him every last piece of herself that she could spare if he needed it.

"I'm here," she said. "I'm always right here."

The light in his eyes then was worth anything. His arms snaked about her, pulling her in tight. He buried his face in her hair and Kagome closed her eyes, her hands fisting in the front of his robes.

When he bent his head to kiss her again she welcomed him. He was tentative at first, searching, but that soon passed as he realized she would not push him away. Then his kiss grew more insistent, the pressure of his lips increasing as they slanted against hers. Kagome found herself arching up onto her tip toes to meet him, even going so far as to bite lightly at his lower lip.

He made a sound that was pure satisfaction and suddenly she was no longer on her feet. He hovered over her as he laid her out on the floor, a crooked smile lighting his face for an instant. With a spike of warmth she realized he meant to lay with her again. A shiver of anticipation went through her, and she forced away the small doubts lingering in the back of her mind.

"Kagome."

He spoke as if her name were the only word he could recall. She could not help but smile up at him.

"I'm here, Inuyasha."

He kissed her once more, hands fumbling to untuck her haori from her hakama. He pulled it loose, releasing her lips to slide it from her shoulders and lay it beneath her. For several long moments he stared at the flesh revealed in the dim light, following the curves and hollows with his eyes.

Slowly he lowered his lips to her collar bone, dragging them down kiss by kiss until he reached the slight swell of her breasts beneath their bindings. Before she could protest he had cut the bindings down the middle, freeing her. His lips on her breast turned what would have been an admonishment into little more than a half-choked sound.

Inadvertently one of his canines grazed her nipple and she gasped, her back arching. Inuyasha froze, looking up at her with pupils dilated so wide that his irises nearly seemed black.

Her look must have matched his because a moment later his head dipped down once more, his lips grazing her nipple. The bud tightened, hardening beneath his touch. Tentatively his tongue swept out and Kagome could not suppress the small mewling noise that escaped her. Inuyasha paused a moment and she could feel a small shudder go through him where they touched before he redoubled his efforts.

Soon her hands had threaded themselves through his hair, fingernails scraping lightly along his scalp. She hit the base of his ears and he jerked against her. Kagome froze, an apology springing to her lips as she looked down at him.

The look on his face stopped her short. His eyes were screwed shut, his breathing heavy, but it was most definitely not pain that wound him tight. Experimentally she flexed her fingers once more, brushing the base of his ears. He jerked once more, groaning lowly. His hips moved against hers and she could feel him straining against her thigh.

Kagome reached down, tugging at the tie that held his hakama and haori in place. Inuyasha glanced up at her. A smile turned up one corner of his lips as he caught her line of thought.

In the space of several moments they were both stripped down to nothing. He was careful to lay his clothes beneath her so that she was not lying on the chilled floor.

He eased into her slowly, carefully. Kagome winced, the pinch of being stretched shooting through her. Bit by bit she felt him fill her and she tilted her hips up to meet him as the ache eased. Finally they were hip to hip.

For a moment Inuyasha rested there, pressed fully against her. His eyes sought hers out and she met his look, her hands sliding up to weave through the silver hair that hung thick around them like a curtain shielding them from the rest of the world.

All the hard lines were gone from his face. A half-laugh escaped him as if he could not quite believe his eyes. He leaned down, his lips brushing lightly across hers.

"You're mine," he murmured, the words almost a question.

Kagome's hands pressed gently against the back of his head, cradling it in the crook between her neck and shoulder. She shifted until her legs were hooked over his hips, deepening the contact between them. Her eyes slid shut as she nodded.

"Yes."

He moved then, pressing deeply into her before withdrawing slowly. Kagome moaned, nails digging lightly into his scalp. He pushed back in with equal slowness and she writhed.

"Harder," she pleaded.

He ignored her, though, reveling in the slow, slick glide of skin on skin. Kagome's legs tightened about his hips. Inuyasha let out a breathless laugh.

"Impatient wench," he huffed into the hollow of her shoulder.

"Inuyasha," Kagome breathed, feeling her walls begin to flutter around him.

She had never thought she would feel this sensation again. This sense that they were together and she would never have to go it alone again. This fullness. It felt as if her head were swimming.

Inuyasha lifted his head enough to look at her. His eyes grew hooded, their breath mingling. He thrust into her harder, his eyes never leaving hers. Kagome gasped and he did it again, his thrusts building in speed until the sound of flesh on flesh echoed through the room.

He groaned her name, twisting his hips and pushing in deep. Kagome gasped, a confused plea tumbling from her lips. He rocked into her hard and Kagome cried out.

"I-Inuyasha!"

"Fuck! Kagome!"

She twisted her hips up to meet his as he rocked into her, her sheath clenching tight around him. Inuyasha grunted, burying his face against her chest as his hips jerked hard against her in one last thrust. His warmth flooded into her.

They lay tangled for several long moments, their muscles slowly relaxing. Kagome could feel Inuyasha's breath warm against her cheek as he straightened out, his hair sliding over her bare chest as his head came to rest beside hers.

He shifted enough to keep his weight off of her, but not enough to break the contact between them. Her body was warm where they touched, but a slight chill ran through her as the sheen of sweat along her body began to cool. He gathered her closer to him.

There were several long moments of silence, reality beginning to take hold of them both once more. Inuyasha held her tighter and Kagome forced herself not to pull away.

"I don't…" Inuyasha spoke quietly, falteringly, at last. "I don't want to…to hurt you like I did to…to Kikyou. I owe her. I'll spend the rest of my life trying to make it right for her. But I…with you…I can't. I don't want to destroy you."

Kagome's eyes slid closed, her stomach sinking. She shook her head.

"You won't destroy me," she said lowly. "You can't. Because you don't love me like you love Kikyou. Because we will never marry. You can't destroy me, Inuyasha."

She could feel him tense against her. He pulled back and she let him go, opening her eyes to meet his gaze. His eyes were wide, brow furrowed darkly.

"Kagome-" he began, his voice sharp.

"You don't love me," Kagome cut across him with equal sharpness, ignoring the twinge she felt. "So long as you need me I am yours. But I will not destroy the things we've built together. Make a mistress of me if you like, but you must still do your duties as the Tennō. All of them."

"Don't fuck with me, Kagome!" Inuyasha snapped, pulling away from her fully. "I don't want a mistress! My mother was…I won't make you a mistress! You can't do this with me and then-!"

Kagome fought back a wince. She realized that once again she had allowed herself to be carried off without stopping to make things clear to him. But there had to be a line. If they were to do this there had to be a line to keep him safe and to keep everything safe that they were working so hard for.

She swallowed back the feeling, the guilt and the hurt.

"I'm sorry, Inuyasha," she spoke softly. "I'm sorry, but this is it. I love you, but this is all I can give to you."

She forced herself to look him in the face, to see what she had wrought through carelessness and a weak will. Her heart sank as his expression did. Her stomach clenched as his expression slowly hardened over, covering the hurt. She tried not to wonder if this would be the last time he would ever show this side of himself to her. She could not afford to break down in front of him. She could not afford to appear uncertain.

Without a word Inuyasha rose, hurriedly redressing. He did not look at her, not even once, as he swept out of the room.

Kagome sat very still for a long time after he left, surprised to find that she could not cry.

She wondered if saving everything would be worth it if in the process she destroyed the one person she wanted to protect most.

* * *

Kagome was roused from a light sleep by the shifting of her futon. She started, muscles tensing.

"Shhh. Calm down, woman."

She blinked, twisting beneath the blankets to meet the source of the voice. He was already halfway beneath the blankets, his expression strangely tentative. His eyes met hers in the dark and she could see the effort he made to look nonchalant.

"Inuyasha? You shouldn't be here-"

"What? You'll fuck me but you won't sleep with me?" he snapped.

"I thought-" she began, then stopped short as she tried to sort out the muddle of her sleep addled thoughts. "I…the servants will talk. The guards will talk. I don't want-"

"Fuck it," Inuyasha huffed. "No one saw me come in."

Kagome frowned.

"Should I be concerned about that?"

"Not if you let me sleep here," he retorted.

Kagome's frown deepened. Inuyasha did not look repentant in the least. His jaw was set stubbornly. At length Kagome sighed.

"Nothing has changed, you know," she said softly, though she could not meet his eyes. She did not want him to see the relief or the need there. She had not thought he would return.

"Kami, Kagome. I know. I fucking know," he said, voice strained. "You think I'm going to forget something like that? I know, but I…I just want you beside me."

Kagome's eyes swept up to his, widening. It was difficult to tell in the dark, but she could almost see the faint flush that colored his cheeks. Still he met her eyes, unwavering.

"Inuyasha…"

But she had no words for him. The best she could do was move over to make room for him in her small futon. He filled the space readily, his arm slipping over her to pull her in.

She settled against him, sighing. For a brief moment she wondered what she was allowing to happen, what insanity was driving her down this path that could lead to nothing. But then he spoke.

"You said you loved me," he murmured against her hair. And she could hear the echo of lonely years in his voice, the smallness and the seeking. And she knew what drove her and that it would continue to drive her to whatever conclusion might come.

"Because I do," she replied. "I love you, Inuyasha."

His lips slid to hers as if he could not reach her fast enough. They made love for the second time that day.

This time Kagome remained by his side through the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -appointments: So this idea is a bit of an amalgamation of things from several courts across countries and time periods that I've read about. Basically the first sons and daughters were brought in to serve the king and queen (i.e. ladies in waiting in England to the queen) as a show of honor and also as a way of the king and queen keeping tabs on the courtiers. Often these same people later served in high positions within the court by virtue of having been in close contact with the king and queen. I know something like this was done in the Heian period with women so that the Emperor could have his pick of concubines, but I'm not as sure if it actually happened in a similar manner with the men.


	31. Of Warnings and Wishes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mini-history lesson:
> 
> -Kōkyū: A section within the Dairi inhabited by court ladies, which often meant concubines and the like. There were others, though, as well, but I’m going to leave this a bit vague for now as it might give away some future plot points before I am ready to. But just know that this place is an actual historical one within the Dairi (or Inner Palace).
> 
> -Daijō-kan: Unlike the note above, this is a place partially of my own invention. Daijō-kan historically speaking is the term for the Great Council of State (or the Council as I’ve referenced them most often in this story). That means the members who made up the governing body beneath the Tennō. There was no place or term I could find, though, for anywhere within the Dairi that these men would be housed, likely because they would not have been living in the Dairi but outside of it in their own residences within the Heian-kyō. I, however, am tweaking this within the story to suit my purposes, so within the context of this story it will reference a specific building within the Dairi.
> 
> -Tsubaki: The Tsubaki flower (or the camellia in English) in Japan is symbolic of discretion and perfect love. The only times we ever see Inuyasha’s mother Izayoi in the anime she is usually seen wearing a juni-hito patterned with what I am pretty sure is the tsubaki flower, so pardon me while I go cry for awhile after catching that little piece of symbolism while researching.

* * *

“...Are you listening to me, Inuyasha?”

There was a long stretch of silence. Kagome frowned.

“Inuyasha?” she repeated, waving a hand before the hanyou’s face in the hopes of catching his attention.

“Huh?” 

He lifted his gaze from where it had been fixated none-too-subtly on the flesh of her chest that was left exposed by the gaping neckline of his too-large haori. Kagome’s frown deepened as she reached to tuck the garment more closely about herself, a flush warming her cheeks. 

Inuyasha had almost insisted on her donning his haori when they had woken not long ago, asserting that it was better suited to keep her warm despite the almost complete lack of chill in the room. Kagome had agreed, still too sleepy to put much thought into anything beyond trying to force herself up and out of the comfort of his arms to begin the day. 

She was beginning to regret her easy assent, though, as he now seemed entirely too interested in the sight of her.

The hanyou flushed in turn as he realized that he had been caught, a scowl creeping up to mask his embarrassment. He huffed, quickly averting his gaze.

“Keh,” he muttered. “Not like I haven’t already seen them already.”

Kagome’s hand shot out, blindly grabbing the nearest thing she could get hold of and chucking it with all her might at him where he still reclined in her futon. It turned out to be no more than a hair ornament and, much to her chagrin, he caught it one-handed. 

“If the sight is already so familiar, then perhaps it does not warrant so much of your attention,” she said stiffly.

His flush deepened at that, though his gaze crept down once more as if of its own volition. As soon as she had released her hold on it the fabric had gaped wide once more.

Kagome felt her face heat further, but a glance at the expression on his face stopped any further outrage short on the tip of her tongue. His look was so openly appreciative of the sight of her, eyes traveling carefully the length of her as if to burn it into his memory, that it was difficult to hold onto her modest indignation.

The sight of the rest of him also did little to inspire outrage in her. He still lay within her futon, not having bothered yet with trying to rise or ready himself for the day, and while her blankets concealed him up to the hip his torso was bare to the morning sunlight. 

Kagome realized abruptly that she had never before seen him in such a state of undress in the light of day. It had always been under the cover of darkness and in the heated rush of them coming together, leaving her little room to truly appreciate the sight. 

She could not deny that she appreciated it now. His chest and arms were all corded muscle and hard lines, clearly visible even in recline. His skin, slightly darker than her own, was perfectly smooth and unblemished. It seemed unfair that the kami could create anyone who looked so well as he did both clothed and unclothed.

Her gaze skimmed up the line of his chest to his face, golden eyes catching her own. She flushed deeply, mortified to realize from the smirk that stretched suddenly across his features that she had been caught ogling him in much the same way he had been her.

He rose from the futon suddenly, crossing the scant distance between them and baring even more of himself to her gaze as the blankets fell away. She felt a flicker of excitement curl through her as she realized that the nenju he still wore about his neck and his haori tied loosely about her frame were the last vestiges of clothing left to separate them.

“Wait.”

She forced the word out, his lips a hair’s breadth from her own. Inuyasha pulled back slowly, a frown drawing his brows together.

“The servants,” she murmured, careful to keep her voice low. “They must be up and about by now. It’s near the time that they usually bring me breakfast. If they were to discover us…”

She trailed off, vaguely mortified at even the idea of someone walking in on the two of them. Inuyasha’s frown deepened into almost a pout, even the ears atop his head drooping somewhat.

He paused, one ear swiveling towards the shoji behind them. Mere moments later a shadow appeared behind it, moving to kneel just outside the room.

“O-Miko-sama,” a woman’s voice called. “Shall I have breakfast prepared for you? Or will you be needing us to help you dress to go out?”

Kagome raised her brows, giving the hanyou a pointed look.

“I told you,” she mouthed silently. 

Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

“Breakfast would be perfect,” Kagome replied aloud. “If you wouldn’t mind having it brought to my room, I think I will eat here this morning.”

“Of course, O-Miko-sama,” she said, her outline bowing before the shoji. “I’ll return shortly.”

The outline rose and there was the soft sound of retreating steps. Kagome waited a few moments more to be safe before rising. 

“We need to hide you,” she whispered, gesturing towards the folding screen tucked away in the corner of her room. 

He rose, as well, and her eyes widened as she was reminded forcefully of his continued state of undress. She averted her eyes quickly, her face burning for what seemed the hundredth time that morning. 

“Clothes,” she murmured. “We definitely need clothes, as well.”

Careful to keep her gaze high, she pushed at his shoulders until he was concealed behind the screen. Hastily she gathered up his clothing from where it was scattered haphazardly throughout the room, tossing it over the screen to him. 

She paused, realizing that she still wore his haori. Surely the servants would not fail to notice such a distinct piece of clothing. She glanced over her shoulder and, satisfied that Inuyasha was busy redressing himself, hurriedly slipped out of the garment and into her sleeping yukata. She tossed it over the folding screen to Inuyasha, regretting almost instantly the loss of the smell of him enveloping her. 

Just in time, though, as the sound of light footsteps neared her the shoji to her room once more. Kagome scrambled into her futon, hastily tucking the blankets about her as if she had only just risen.

“May I enter, O-Miko-sama?” 

Kagome spared a quick glance at the screen to make certain that Inuyasha was fully concealed before replying.

“You may.”

The woman slid the shoji open, bowing before entering the room with a large tray of food. She set it down on a low wooden table not far from the folding screen. Kagome eyed it, noting the abundance of dishes.

“Chūsei-san’s orders,” the girl said cheerfully, catching her look. “She says we need to make sure that you’re keeping your strength up, busy as you always are, O-Miko-sama.”

She was one of Chūsei’s, then. Kagome offered her a smile. 

“Thank you,” she said. “Your efforts are invaluable to me.”

The girl fairly beamed at the praise.

“As yours are to us,” she replied. “Also, O-Miko-sama, if I may be so bold as to say it, you have a glow about you this morning of good health. Has something happened?”

Kagome felt her smile slip a notch, her glance darting to the folding screen before she could stop it. She fought down a blush she could feel threatening to rise.

“J-just a good night’s rest,” she said. 

The girl nodded, accepting this easily enough.

“They say it can do wonders for a body,” she said. “Well, I wish you many more night’s like last, then. I’ll take my leave, O-Miko-sama, and allow you some peace to eat.”

Kagome nodded weakly, fighting down the urge to cover her face with her hands. She could have sworn she caught some small strangled noise from behind the folding screen and she shot it a glare.

“Thank you,” she managed to the girl as she bowed, sliding the shoji closed.

Soft footsteps trailed away. Inuyasha emerged from behind the screen, his look nothing short of smug as he eyed her. 

“Don’t,” she said warningly. 

He flopped down beside the low wooden table where the food had been placed, grabbing a piece of grilled fish and popping it into his mouth even as his gaze never left her face.

“A good night’s rest, huh?” he said, self-satisfaction curling around each word.

Kagome glared, though the ferocity of the look was somewhat undermined by a blush that she was sure must rival Inuyasha’s haori in color. She half-wished the floor would simply open and swallow her, if only to end the non-stop mortification of the morning.

“Don’t eat with your hands,” she chided to cover her embarrassment. “And don’t talk with your mouth full. Have you already forgotten all of our lessons together?”

The hanyou rolled his eyes, pointedly grabbing another piece of fish and shoving it into his mouth. 

“Like I could forget,” he muttered.

He paused, glancing from the food to her as he reached for another bite. He rose suddenly and in one quick motion picked up the table. The dishes atop rattled precariously and Kagome tensed.

He managed to set the table down directly before her without toppling anything. Kagome blinked at him as he gave her and then the food a pointed look. 

“Eat,” he said, pushing a dish towards her. “Chūsei‘s right. You don’t eat nearly enough for all the running around you do.”

“I eat plenty,” Kagome murmured, though she took up the hashi laid out on the table.

Inuyasha watched her for several more moments until he was satisfied that she was indeed eating before resuming his own meal. Kagome watched him from the corner of her eye as she ate-albeit much more sedately than the hanyou-quietly reflecting that perhaps this was not too bad a way to pass a morning after all. Though they would really need to find a more discreet way of going about this in the future.

She paused, her hashi poised just before her lips. 

Would this continue in the future? And, if so, for how long? How long could they possibly carry on in such an odd manner? With the necessity of the appointments and Inuyasha securing his position by producing an heir looming large-

Kagome set her hashi down. Inuyasha glanced at her, frowning faintly.

“Kagome?”

“About what I was trying to tell you earlier,” she said, unable to quite meet his gaze. “I learned something a few days ago that you should know.”

Inuyasha paused, his gaze fixing fully on her. 

“I spoke with Taira Kagura-sama,” she said softly.

“You what?” Inuyasha said, a hint of ire creeping into his tone.

Kagome held up a hand to forestall him.

“I wasn’t in any danger,” she said quickly. “Kagura-sama...she felt she owed me something. She was merely making good on her word to me.” 

Inuyasha’s frown only deepened.

“Kagura?” he echoed incredulously. “Taira Kagura? The one who hates our guts and has tried to undermine us at every fucking turn?” 

“We have come to...an understanding of sorts,” Kagome hedged.

Kagura’s feelings were no one’s concern save hers and Sesshomaru’s unless the youkai woman chose to make them known. Kagome would certainly not be the one to expose her, not even to Inuyasha. 

If anything Inuyasha’s frown only deepened at the vague explanation, but he was silent as he waited for her to continue.

“She told me the story of a boy named Onigumo, who was brought into the court years ago and adopted by the Taira,” Kagome said softly, her gaze falling to her lap. “A boy who I believe is responsible for the deaths of your father and mother, as well as many others.”

“...What?”

Kagome lifted her gaze to his face. His eyes wide, almost stricken as they met hers. Her heart twisted in her chest and she reached out, placing her hand over his where it rested atop the table.

“Onigumo, he’s the spider youkai that I have encountered so many times,” she continued. “Or, at least, I am fairly certain that he is. Kagura-sama said that he was human when he was brought into the court, but that he...he changed somehow. Became something else.”

“She said that he has been controlling her and others, possibly a good number among the Taira clan and even outside of it. She thinks that he has been working to take the throne for himself, biding his time until he has enough power.” 

She paused, searching Inuyasha’s face. His hand had curled into a fist beneath hers, claws leaving small grooves in the wood of the table even as he was careful not to hurt her. His gaze had turned inward, features drawn tight. 

“And how do we know she isn’t feeding you a load of bullshit?” he said lowly. 

Kagome shook her head. 

“I have no way of knowing for certain,” she said. “But I trust her.”

Inuyasha glanced at her, nodding after a moment.

“Then tell me where to find the fucking bastard,” he said. “I’ll tear him limb from limb for what he’s done to you and my mother.”

Kagome frowned, her gaze falling away from his.

“Kagura-sama wasn’t able to tell me where he is,” she said. “Save that he’s no longer here in the court. She said that he really only communicates with her to give her orders, but tells her little else.”

“Then we have to get him to show himself,” Inuyasha said. “Bastard can’t just hide in the shadows forever. There’s gotta be something we can use to draw him out!”

Kagome blinked, realizing suddenly that there was something. Something that she had that Naraku very much wanted.

Inuyasha paused, seeing the shift in her expression. 

“Kagome?”

“There is something,” she said aloud, faintly. “Something that I have that Kagura-sama said Onigumo has been searching for for some time. I think...I think we could use it to lure him out, but…”

She trailed off, a chill rippling across her flesh. Inuyasha’s hand, still beneath hers on the table, shifted to grasp her own. Her gaze fixed on their interlocked hands and she found that she could not raise it to meet his own.

“Kagome,” he said, leaning towards her. “What are you talking about?” 

She found herself hesitating. From all that she had experienced and all that she had heard from Midoriko, the Shikon rarely brought anything but misfortune to those who knew of its existence. Was she truly prepared to risk bringing Inuyasha into that?

His hand tightened around hers and she glanced up at him. His expression was earnest as he watched her, his concern for her undisguised. 

Kagome took a deep breath. She trusted him and, whatever might happen, she would make certain that the misfortune of the Jewel would never touch him.

“It’s called the Shikon Jewel,” she said softly. “I’ve...I’ve carried it with me since I was young, though I only learned of it after coming to the court. It’s...powerful. It was passed down from the kami and can grant any wish, but it’s dangerous. It can twist people, corrupt their hearts somehow.”

“But if it can grant any wish, why not use it?” Inuyasha said. “We could wish defeat on our enemies, wish for peace for the villages, wish for-”

He cut himself short, but his eyes were intent on her face. Too intent. Kagome shook her head.

“It’s difficult to explain, but the wish has to be right,” she said. “I have sworn to guard it with my life until I can figure out what the right wish is.”

She pushed the blanket down past her hips, reaching down to press her fingertips to the point on her hip where she knew the Shikon to be. She applied gentle pressure to the spot, focusing her spiritual energy into it until it began to glow a soft pink through the light fabric of her sleeping yukata. The flesh around it tingled strangely, a sensation almost like small embers blooming beneath her skin.

Inuyasha’s eyes widened, the soft glow reflected in them. He reached out, his fingertips touching her own as they grazed the spot. 

“It’s inside of you?” he said.

“It’s a bit of a long story,” Kagome replied softly. “But yes. It’s housed inside of me now and I intend to keep it there until the right wish can be found.”

Inuyasha’s gaze rose back to her face, his brow furrowing deeply. 

“Kagome,” he said. “You can’t be serious. Holding on to that thing-”

“Is my duty,” Kagome broke in firmly. “This is what I have chosen, Inuyasha, and I did not tell you about it so that you could try to talk me out of it.”

Inuyasha’s frown sharpened into a glare. He opened his mouth, jaw clearly set for an argument, but brought himself up short at the look on her face. He had seen it often enough to know that there was no winning against it. He huffed out a sigh, shaking his head.

“Fine,” he snapped. “But that means we’re definitely not using it to lure that bastard out.”

Kagome blinked, surprised by the sudden shift.

“What?” she said. “But, Inuyasha, your mother and father-”

“Don’t get me wrong,” Inuyasha said. “I’m gonna find that fucker and when I do I’m gonna make him pay for what he did to my mother and my old man a thousand times over. But I won’t use you as bait to do it, Kagome. I can’t. There’s bound to be some other way to draw him out, and I swear that I’ll find it.”

“Inuyasha…”

Without thought she leaned forward, wrapping her arms about him. She pressed herself close, grateful to feel his arms come up around her.

“We’ll find him,” she murmured into his shoulder. “I swear to you we will find him and stop him. We will make it right for everyone.”

“Yeah."

* * *

Stealth, Kagome reflected grimly, was not a skill that Inuyasha possessed in abundance. She knew that she should have expected as much from all that she knew of him already, but it was another thing entirely to see it in action. 

After a few more half-hearted attempts between them to think of ways beyond the Shikon Jewel that Onigumo-or Naraku, as Kagome informed Inuyasha that he might now be called-might be induced to reveal himself, they gave the effort over for the time being in favor of finishing breakfast. They both vowed to continue thinking the matter over on their own and to alert the other should they come up with anything. 

Thus it was that after Inuyasha finished shoveling as much food into his mouth as he could manage and pressing her to do the same that they both realized the necessity of getting him out of her chambers and back to his own as quickly as possible before they ended up being discovered. 

Any hallways were out of the question as the sun had risen high enough that there would be servants bustling about almost anywhere that they might think to go. Luckily there was a high window in Kagome’s room that the hanyou could just clear, though he admitted this only reluctantly when pressed as to how he had been able to get into her room in the first place.

Just outside the window were the west gardens of the residence, surrounded by a high wall that Inuyasha could easily leap. All that they needed to do was ensure that the west garden was clear of witnesses and no one would be any the wiser about his presence there that night. 

Inuyasha said he could not scent or hear anyone out in the area and, after eyeing her for a long moment, leaned in to press a hasty kiss to her lips before fairly fleeing the room. 

Of course, in the process of fleeing he also managed to both knock over the folding screen with his foot and hit something out in the garden with such force that nearby birds were startled into flight. Kagome sighed, reflecting as she heard the guards hurrying down the hall towards her room that they really needed to find a better way to go about this.

After a few convoluted explanations to the guards about some strange bird that had flown into her window and caused the ruckus, she was at last allowed to dress and leave her residence. 

With her guard in tow she decided to do a small circuit through the streets of the court before heading to her ultimate destination of the Chūwain. The handful of courtiers who approached her on her way confirmed what she had suspected, most of their comments vague allusions to the rumored appointments that were to occur. Word had indeed spread quickly. 

She and Inuyasha would need to get to work on finding a way to make those selections soon. At least, she lamented to herself, as soon as she could get Inuyasha himself to fully accept the idea. 

She climbed the towering steps to the Chūwain, sparing a glance for the west wing as she went. For half a moment she considered going to see Sesshoumaru, but dismissed the idea quickly. She had already pushed the youkai just to the point of agreeing to help her. There was no use in pushing any further for the time being. He would summon her when he was ready.

She passed beneath the tori and moved through the purification ritual alongside her guards, clapping to alert the kami to their presence before turning her steps towards the main hall. 

She came across several disciples of the temple there who told her that Midoriko was currently out performing a blessing, but that she would likely return soon if she wished to wait. Kagome agreed, informing them that she would be waiting in Amaterasu’s pagoda if they could direct Midoriko there upon her return. They agreed, offering to have tea and food brought out to her. Kagome declined, still uncomfortably full after Inuyasha’s relentless efforts to have her eat enough breakfast. 

At the pagoda Kagome asked her guard to fall back a bit and they obliged, moving to ring the area as she crossed over the small stream that surrounded the statue. 

She breathed a soft sigh as she crossed the threshold, her thoughts quieting almost instantly. Ever since Midoriko had first shown it to her the statue of Amaterasu had had a calming effect on her, but now as she neared it she could feel the sun scar on her shoulder warm as if bathed in the rays of the sun. It was a soothing warmth, spreading slowly through her limbs as she came to kneel before the statue. 

It was first time she had been back since Amaterasu had revealed herself to her through the statue, and she wondered if the kami was still present there. The stone eyes that looked out on her now were kind but vacant.

Kagome breathed deeply, her eyes sliding shut. She tried to picture that place where she had lain in an endless field of tall grass with the warmth of the sun caressing her limbs. Tried to picture those eyes that had gazed down at her, their color an otherworldly amber and their expression infinitely kind. 

Amaterasu had said that she was glad that Kagome had chosen to return. She had said that she would be watching over her. Was she pleased by what she saw now? Was she walking a path that the kami could be proud of?

It was difficult to know. Much of the world around her still seemed a tangle of loose and knotted threads. Thanks to Kagura she now knew who was at the center of so much of the chaos, but not how to find or stop him. She knew of ships off the coast, but not where exactly they were or what their aim might be. She could feel things slowly beginning to knit together in the court and the villages, but she was uncertain how to go about stabilizing them with so much still unsettled.

But for all of this, she did not feel so nearly so frightened as she once had. Because now he was at her side. Because, for all that their relationship had become far from traditional, she felt now more than ever before his steadying presence beside her. Because as long as they were together she knew that they could keep moving forward. 

“Kagome?”

Kagome started slightly, drawn abruptly back into herself. She blinked, turning to face the woman kneeling at her side.

Midoriko offered her a smile that was faintly sheepish around the edges.

“My apologies, child,” she said. “I of all people should know better than to interrupt someone during their meditations.”

Kagome shook her head, offering the woman a smile in return.

“Not at all,” she said. “I was the one who called you out here, after all.” 

“I am glad that you did,” Midoriko replied, settling in beside her. “I will confess that I feared I might have run you off for good after our last conversation.”

Kagome blinked, recalling suddenly what exactly their last conversation had been. Shame crept hotly up the back of her neck as she recalled how she had all but fled the elder miko’s presence after Midoriko had shared with her one of her darkest moments. She bowed her head low before the other woman.

“My apologies, Midoriko-sama,” she said, eyes fixed on her lap as she bowed over it. “You attempted to share something very precious to you with me and I-”

“Raise your head, Kagome,” Midoriko cut across her gently. 

Kagome did so slowly. Midoriko’s eyes were gentle as they met hers, no hint of reproval there. 

“I pressed you too hard,” she said. “What was meant to be merely a guiding hand turned into a forceful push in my desire to see that you did not unwittingly repeat my mistakes. And though I stand fast by my decision to support whatever path you might choose to take, you must be the one to choose to take it. Anything less would be meaningless.”

Kagome glanced at the statue of Amaterasu beside them, her mentor’s words unwittingly echoing the words the kami had spoken to her in that otherworldly place. She smiled softly to herself. 

“I told his Majesty of the Shikon today,” she said, careful to keep her voice low enough that it did not carry to the guards ringing the pagoda.

Midoriko’s brows rose. She frowned faintly.

“That is a great deal of trust to place in someone,” she said softly. 

Kagome nodded, silently conceding this. Her gaze shifted back to Midoriko’s face. 

“I know,” she said. “But the Tennō-sama’s heart is good, however his Majesty might work to conceal it. I have faith in him.”

Midoriko nodded, though her expression only grew more sober. 

“I have no doubt of it,” she said. “But I have seen even good hearts brought low by the Shikon. The world carves weakness into all who live, and weakness naturally seeks out power to conceal itself.”

Kagome frowned, silently conceding this. Still, she could not believe that she had been wrong in choosing to trust Inuyasha. 

“What did his Majesty say of it?” Midoriko asked after Kagome was silent for a beat.

“His Majesty asked if it might be used to make any wish,” Kagome said softly. “And asked if it was my intent to continue guarding it. I believe his Majesty was concerned about the risk to me should I continue.”

“Rightfully so,” Midoriko murmured, casting her a meaningful glance. 

Kagome’s gaze slid away from hers, her hands twisting in her lap. That was one problem that she still did not feel equal to facing at the moment.

“I had thought that we might begin training today to help me keep from drawing on the Jewel any further,” she said, as close as she was willing to come to the subject. 

“Of course,” Midoriko said. “I will caution you, though, child. Youkai more than most seem to be drawn in by the power of the Jewel. I know his Majesty is only half, however…”

Midoriko trailed off at the look on the younger woman’s face. Her look had hardened and even as she met her eyes she could see the line of her shoulders straightening defiantly. Clearly any further warnings concerning their sovereign would fall on deaf ears.

Midoriko sighed. She understood only too well the blinding fervor that love could inspire. She would simply have to continue her watch over the girl as best she could.

“Let us see what we can do by way of controlling your use of the Jewel, then,” Midoriko said by way of concession.

Some of the tension went out of Kagome’s frame and she nodded.

“Thank you,” she said, the air to the words somewhat apologetic. “I would greatly appreciate the instruction.”

“I suppose, then, it would be most beneficial to focus on teaching you how to choose where you pull your spiritual energies from,” said Midoriko thoughtfully. “Which begs the question, where does your power come from, Kagome?”

Kagome frowned, her head tilting slightly as she considered this. After a moment she gestured to the statue of Amaterasu.

“From the kami,” she said. “Do we not all draw  
our power from them?”

“Of course,” Midoriko said, nodding. “The kami grant all of us the initial gift of our abilities. But each of us must in our journey find something more, something beyond the mere fact that we possess power. A reason. When you think of your reason, you find your own unique source and can better understand how to utilize it.”

“My reason?” Kagome echoed.

She frowned, her brow furrowing slightly as she considered this. It seemed a simple enough question, but it was one she had never really given any thought to. Her power had simply been with her since she was young, a thing no more to be questioned than why grass grew or a river flowed. 

She closed her eyes, concentrating. Behind her closed lids she saw her mother, her brother, her grandfather. She saw Kaede and Haru. She saw Jinenji and Yuutarou. She saw Shippou and Sango and Miroku.

She saw Inuyasha.

“To protect,” she said at last, her eyes sliding open. “My power is meant to protect.”

Midoriko smiled, her expression warming.

“A worthy reason indeed,” she said softly. “Then,  
when you think of wanting to protect someone, where do you most feel it?”

Kagome hesitated a moment before placing a hand over her chest.

“Here, I think,” she said.

Midoriko nodded, her smile widening.

“Then that is where you must pull from when you wish to use your power,” she said. “It is a thing akin to aiming an arrow. Your intent must be clear and your aim true. Lose either thing and your shot is bound to go awry. Close your eyes, child, and turn your senses inward. Focus on what it is that you wish to protect.”

Obediently Kagome’s eyes slid shut. She slowed her breath, searching with her senses through her body. The Jewel’s energy was there clear as day, but where was her own?

She summoned up thoughts of her family and friends, pictured each of them as if they were before her now. 

Suddenly the space inside her chest lit up with an almost blinding brilliance. Her power, she realized with a smile. All her own, unmingled with that of the Jewel.

“That is where you must focus when you wish to use your spiritual energy,” she heard Midoriko say as if from a distance. “Pull only from that source and you should be able to avoid drawing on the Jewel.” 

Kagome nodded, her eyes sliding open once more.

“I think I understand,” she said. “But, Midoriko-sama, are there those who draw their power from other places?”

“Of course,” Midoriko said, nodding. “I myself pull from somewhere near my eyes, though I have trained disciples over the years who pulled power from almost everywhere, including one man who drew it up from the very soles of his feet. The paths we walk shape us all differently. Just as two people will seldom ever walk the same path, two people will seldom ever share the same source of power.”

Kagome nodded, considering this. A small smile tipped up the corners of her lips. 

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” she said softly.

Midoriko’s look mirrored her own. 

“Infinitely,” she said. 

* * *

Kagome remained a time longer with her mentor, Midoriko guiding her through a few exercises more to ensure that she could draw properly from the wellspring of her own spiritual abilities. 

Once they had finished they retired to the main hall of the Chūwain at Kagome’s request. She had hoped that her mentor might be able to share with her some insight into the appointments and how she and Inuyasha might begin to go about them.

Midoriko was able to provide her with further detail on the practice and how it had been used in the past to foster close relations between the courtiers and the Tennō. She was also able to detail where within the Dairi those called to the appointments were traditionally housed during the time of their service, in the Kōkyū and the Daijō-kan respectively. These residences would need to be cleaned and readied in preparation.

The one thing she could not provide, however, was a method for selecting those to be appointed. It had always been firstborns in the past and thus there were no systems in place for making the selections beyond that.

They had discussed briefly various tests that they might try, but had been unable to settle on anything in particular. For one thing there was the expense and time that would be necessitated by such an endeavor. For another Kagome was entirely uncertain if such tests would even bring her the people she was truly hoping to find. 

After all, it was no great feat to discover if a person was knowledgeable or strong or refined. But what tests could be given that would reveal kindness? Greatness of spirit? Strength of will?

It was a shame, Midoriko had lamented before they parted, that it was so difficult to truly know another person’s heart.

Upon parting, Kagome had returned to her room in the Chūgū’s residence, asking one of the servants there if Chūsei could be sent to her as soon as she was available. If nothing else, she could at least begin to have the residences prepared for when she did figure out how to proceed with the appointments.

She pulled from her trunk the lists that she had drawn up what felt like a lifetime ago of the clans and what she knew of them. Perhaps looking them over might provide her some new insights.

She found as she skimmed through them, though, that much had shifted since last she had had the time to review them. Many of the clans that she had once thought opposed or at least ambivalent to Inuyasha’s rule no longer seemed to be so. And then there was the name of the Fujiwara clan glaring up at her from the page-

“That one has always been a particular piece of work,” a voice said suddenly from just beside her ear, a finger appearing to tap a page just above the kanji for the name Abe Hakujou.

Kagome jumped, nearly falling back into the figure behind her in her surprise. A gentle hand on her shoulder steadied her. 

She turned, meeting the faintly amused look of Chūsei. 

“Deep in thought, were we?” the older woman teased gently. “I did call out before I entered.”

Kagome offered her a sheepish smile, gesturing to the cushion she had set out beside her.

“My apologies,” she said. “I seem to be easily distracted of late.” 

Chūsei smiled, lowering herself to kneel beside her. 

“I can hardly claim to be surprised,” she said. “Considering that you have yet to meet a problem that you did not wish to involve yourself in somehow. At least you seem to be eating properly again. This morning’s breakfast dishes were spotless when I saw them.”

Kagome flushed, her gaze sliding to her hands as she recalled exactly who was responsible for that. 

“Yes, well,” she hedged. “I suppose I had worked up something of an appetite.”

She paused, her flush deepening to a burning red as she realized the implication of her poorly chosen words. Chūsei eyed her suspiciously, but thankfully allowed it to pass without comment.

“I’ll be sure to set out more for you on the morrow,” she said.

Inwardly Kagome winced, certain there was no way that she could possibly consume that much food. Outwardly she forced a smile, nodding. 

“Thank you,” she said. “I was also hoping that I might make a request of you, though I know I have likely already made far too many.”

Chūsei smiled, shaking her head. 

“You know you needn’t ask me, O-Miko-sama,” she said. “I am yours to command so long as you have need of me.”

“I know,” said Kagome. “But I want you to know that these are not commands. Anything I ask of you you are free to refuse me without consequence.”

“And that is why I will continue to agree,” said Chūsei. “It is more than many among us are allowed. So what is it that I can be of help with?”

“I am in need of a master organizer,” Kagome said. “And I know of no one more skilled than you, Chūsei-san.”

Chūsei flushed faintly at the praise, waving a hand as if to deflect it.

“What am I to be organizing, then?” she said.

“The Kōkyū and the Daijō-kan,” Kagome replied. “I am hoping to have them cleaned and furnished for use again.”

“For the appointments,” Chūsei supplied.

Kagome nodded. 

“I assume that the courtiers have been talking about them, then,” said Kagome, raising a brow. 

“Oh, O-Miko-sama,” Chūsei said, shaking her head. “You’ve no idea. Word of that conversation had already left the Minamoto residence before you even stepped foot outside of it. Safe to say that word has likely reached nearly every corner of the court by now.”

Kagome worried her lip lightly between her teeth, uncertain if this was desirable considering where Inuyasha currently stood on the issue. Still, there was no undoing it now. She would simply have to convince him. 

“What do they say of it?” she said, turning her gaze back to Chūsei.

“Many seem interested from what we have been able to gather,” the older woman replied. “A few wary. I think most are eager to have a pair of eyes close to yourself and his Majesty that they might more closely observe you. And the potential for power and advancement certainly has its own appeal for them.”

Kagome frowned, her gaze sliding to the names on the papers strewn out across her table. She sighed, running a finger lightly along a row of kanji as if it might reveal something to her. 

“That’s what worries me,” she said. “I do not wish for this to become a mere bid for power. I want to...to build something. To begin to try and create a court and Council that will work for all of us, not just some.”

Chūsei smiled softly, reaching out to place her hand lightly over Kagome’s on the table. 

“I have faith in you, O-Miko-sama,” she said. “I have been allowed to see enough of your heart in my time serving you to know you will settle for nothing less.”

Kagome’s gaze slid from their hands to Chūsei’s face, her brow furrowing slightly.

“My heart?” she echoed, the words somehow ringing odd in her ears.

Her eyes grew wide. She leapt up, gripping Chūsei’s hand in both of hers and nearly dragging the woman up with her.

“O-Miko-sama, what-?”

“Chūsei-san, that’s perfect!” Kagome exclaimed.

Chusei frowned, clearly confused. Kagome fairly beamed at her, giving her hand a small shake in her excitement.

“It’s you, Chūsei-san! You are the answer!” Kagome said. “You and all of the servants. You can be the ones to choose!”

Chūsei’s frown deepened, her eyes growing round as full moons in her face. She struggled for a moment, her mouth opening and closing as if she could not quite recall how to form words.

“Choose?” she said faintly at last. “O-Miko-sama, you can’t mean…”

Kagome nodded, meeting her look steadily. 

“I do,” she said. “And why not? Your network is already in place. You see them every day, speak with them every day, and you know them perhaps better than anyone else can. Why not you?”

Chūsei blinked, shaking her head.

“I understand your intentions, O-Miko-sama,” she said. “And I appreciate deeply the faith you would place in us, but we don’t receive the same education or training that courtiers do.”

“Perhaps not,” Kagome said. “But you recognize kindness. You see honesty. You do not need to read the texts they read to know a strong mind. You do not need to be trained in the language of the fan to see nobility of spirit.”

“And who better than you to judge them truly? What better way to truly understand a person than to look at the way in which they treat those from whom they think they have nothing to lose or gain?”

Chūsei met her look, face slightly pale even as some of the tension eased out of her features. Kagome squeezed her hand.

“As I have said, you are free to refuse me anything I ask,” she said softly. “And I am asking. Only just consider it first. You know them, do you not? You see them in ways that his Majesty and I will never be able to. Why not lend us your eyes once more?”

Chūsei hesitated, her gaze falling to the floor beneath them.

“The amount of power you would be giving to us,” she said softly. “Do you understand what it would mean?”

Kagome offered her a small smile.

“Responsibility is what I offer you,” she said. “And a great deal of it, I know. But you must also see that it is a chance that perhaps you have never had before, a chance to have a say in what your future will look like. What all of our futures will look like.”

A small tremor passed through the older woman’s frame, her eyes still fixed on the floor between them. Suddenly, though, her head jerked up, her eyes twin blazing suns.

She nearly launched herself forward, her arms wrapping about Kagome’s frame so tightly that for a moment the younger woman thought she might mean to squeeze the last breath from her body. 

“And what sort of weak-hearted fool would I be to refuse this?” she murmured. “Only promise me one thing: whatever this future is that we build, we build it together.”

Kagome smiled, swallowing against the sudden tightness in her throat. She nodded, her arms coming up around the woman in return.

“Always.”

* * *

Kagome remained with Chūsei only a little longer to discuss the matter, both women still a bit too excited to be able to plan with clear heads. Chūsei also pointed out that she would need a bit of time to reach out to the servants among her network to see if they would be willing, though she seemed to think that with the right explanation they would be inclined to agree.

Kagome had thanked her profusely before nearly running the entire way to Inuyasha’s chambers. The idea was too perfect. Surely even he would not be able to object to it if she presented it properly.

She was pleased to see the guards outside his chambers, signaling that he was indeed inside. She had thought he might be as the light was rapidly fading out of the day, but of late his schedule had been so erratic that it was hard to know for certain.

She bowed to the guards as she reached them and they bowed in return, allowing her entry without question. Her own guard of two men silently joined them to wait at the entrance to Inuyasha’s chambers.

Kagome blinked as she stepped past the entryway hanging, surprised that for once Inuyasha had lit several of the lamps in his chamber. The room was bathed in a soft glow, the faint smell of smoke from the oil curling through it.

A loud sneeze sounded from a corner of the room, drawing Kagome’s attention. She was surprised once more to see Inuyasha there, face screwed up as he scrubbed his sleeve beneath his nose.

Kagome blinked, cocking her head slightly as she considered him.

“Did you just sneeze?” she said. 

Inuyasha lowered his sleeve, his expression twisting defensively.

“Keh,” he said. “What? Am I not allowed to sneeze now?”

“It’s not that,” Kagome said. “I just don’t think I have ever seen you do it before. You’ve always told me that hanyou do not get cold or fall ill.”

“Hanyou don’t get sick,” Inuyasha said stubbornly. “I just caught a whiff of something that stinks.”

He wrinkled his nose, casting a baleful glance at the lantern nearest to him. 

“Is it the lanterns?” Kagome said, recalling how sensitive his sense of smell was. “Is that why you never light them? We can put them out if they are bothering you.”

She stepped further into the room, moving towards the lantern nearest to her. 

“Wait,” Inuyasha said, half rising from where he sat as far from the lanterns as he could position himself. “Leave ‘em. It’s f-”

He was cut short by another sneeze, even more powerful than the last. He blinked, eyes crossing in a glare as if his own nose had somehow betrayed him.

“Inuyasha…”

“It’s fine,” the hanyou repeated.

Kagome eyed him skeptically. He flushed faintly, his gaze sliding away.

“Look, you humans don’t see too good in the dark because your eyes are so weak, right?” he said. “I just thought this would be more comfortable for you, alright?”

The latter part of the sentence devolved into a murmur so low Kagome scarcely caught it. She blinked, slowly processing the words.

He was trying to make his chambers more comfortable for her.

Warmth filled her chest, expanding until it felt as if she might be consumed by it. She felt an answering flush spread across her face.

“Oh,” she said softly. “Thank you.”

He huffed, crossing his arms over his chest even as the red on his cheeks deepened. He shot her a glance from the corner of his eye, his expression softening somewhat.

“Yeah.”

Kagome smiled, moving the last of the way to kneel at his side. 

Closer up she could see that his skin had a faint sheen to it, moisture pooling in small beads across it. The mass of his silver hair hung in a sodden tangle down his back, dampening the back of his haori in a dark patch.

“What?” Inuyasha said, catching her look. “Hanyou bathe just like everyone else, too.”

Kagome shot him a dry look before her gaze was drawn back to his hair, a frown edging her lips.

“Of course you do,” she said. “But look at your hair! It’s a mess, and it’s still all wet. Did the servants not help you to brush it out?”

She paused, realizing as she spoke the words that if Inuyasha’s baths were anything like the ones she had been subjected to so many times, then it was likely female servants who were bathing him. A sudden image formed in her mind’s eye of Inuyasha, naked and reclining in a large tub as servant women fussed all around him.

She frowned, feeling a faint prickle of something unpleasant creep through her. 

“Keh,” said Inuyasha, blessedly drawing her away from the thought. “As if I need help to wash myself. I banned the servants from coming anywhere near that tub while I’m in it forever ago. Besides, the few times I let ‘em do it when I was a kid, all they did was stare at me like a bunch of weirdos. My mother finally had to take over doing it just to get them to cut it out.”

Until his mother was not there to do it anymore either, Kagome reflected to herself. And then he had only had himself.

She could only imagine how he must have felt. To be a child was already to be infinitely small and vulnerable, open and attuned to any slight, and to add to the strangeness of it people who should have been responsible for his care staring at him as if he were some kind of oddity…

Her heart twisted in her chest.

“I could do it for you, if you want,” she said.

His gaze snapped to hers, his eyes growing wide. Her own eyes widened as she caught the accidental implication of her words.

She held up her hands as if to snatch the words back, her face heating.

“B-Brush your hair out for you!” she stammered. “Not the bathing thing! J-just to help get the snarls out of it…”

She trailed off weakly, wishing that the floor might somehow swallow her.

Inuyasha blinked, some of the shock going out of his expression. 

“Oh,” he said. “Y-yeah. I guess, if you want.”

Kagome nodded, faintly surprised that he was going to allow her. She would have thought he would have put up a little more resistance.

“Do you have a comb somewhere?” she asked. 

He frowned, considering this for a moment before gesturing with his chin to a nearby black lacquered wooden chest.

“In there maybe?” he said, the words more question than statement. 

Kagome raised her brows, rising to go to the chest.

“It really has been awhile, hasn’t it?” she murmured. 

“I heard that,” Inuyasha said, an ear swiveling meaningfully in her direction. “It always dries out just fine on its own.”

Kagome rolled her eyes, her hands sifting through the contents of the chest. Her fingers skimmed across the telltale feel of small tines and she tugged the thing up out of the clutter. She blinked, surprised to find that it was a small ornamental comb. The black spine was patterned with small carvings of the tsubaki flower.

She held it up for the hanyou to see, shooting him a questioning look. He blinked, his expression softening. 

“That was my mother’s,” he said lowly. “Forgot I had that.”

He turned away, though not quite quickly enough to conceal the vulnerable look in his eyes.

“Would it be alright if I used it?” Kagome asked softly.

“...Yeah,” he said, though he did not turn to face her.

Kagome nodded to herself, rising to move back to his side. She knelt down behind him just within reach of his hair. She reached out, gingerly taking a handful of the damp strands into her hand.

She saw him tense almost instinctively, his spine and shoulders going rigid. Kagome paused in her movements as he half-glanced back at her over his shoulder, his eyes uncertain. He relaxed slowly at the sight of her, turning his back to her once more.

“Sorry,” Kagome said quietly, though she was uncertain for what.

“‘S‘alright,” he murmured. “Not your fault.”

Kagome blinked, looking from the line of his back to the length of silver hair in her hand. She bit her lip, struck suddenly by the trust in her the gesture betrayed.

Slowly, carefully she began to work the comb through the ends of his hair. It was even more impossibly tangled than she had imagined. She watched as she worked the wariness drain gradually from his frame, his body relaxing back towards her. 

“Did you mother do this for you, as well?” she asked, her hands working patiently through a particularly bad snarl.

“Yeah. She was the only one, I think.”

Kagome frowned, glancing up at the line of his profile. She could see nothing of his expression and his voice gave away little.

“Where did you go?” she asked after a moment. “I mean, after she...after she had to leave. Where did you go to stay?”

Inuyasha shrugged, a slight jerking of his shoulders. 

“A few places,” he said, his voice growing distant. “With her clan for a while. Then with a few other minor clans when they got tired of it. Eventually I found places around the court I could be on my own. Everywhere else was too stuffy.”

Kagome’s eyes slid closed for a moment, her heart clenching at the image of him as a child wandering the court all on his own in search of places to hide.

“I’m sorry,” she said, the words scarcely a whisper. “That must have been lonely.”

Inuyasha scoffed quietly, but said nothing.

“I think I can understand it a bit,” she said. “When I was younger, the children in my village used to run away from me. All I wanted was to be able to play with them, but I think they were a bit scared of me. I always had my mother and grandfather to run back to when I got sad, though, and Souta later on. Still, I always used to wish that I could join the other kids somehow.”

She paused, realizing that she had reached the base of his ears as she worked. They twitched faintly and she was struck for a moment by the stark otherness of him.

Midoriko’s words from earlier in the day echoed back to her. Kagome frowned.

“What would you wish for?” she said suddenly.

Inuyasha was silent for a long moment.

“I would become a full youkai,” he said at last, with a resolve that sent a chill through her.

“...What?” she breathed.

“If I became full, I would finally be strong enough,” Inuyasha said lowly. “I would finally be able to protect the people who mattered.”

“Inuyasha-”

“I’m not an idiot, Kagome,” Inuyasha snapped, the words spilling from him as if he could not contain them any longer. “I get it. I know how many people have suffered because of what I am. My old man. My mother. Kikyou. You. Hell, this whole fucking mess of a court is all because I wasn’t strong enough to just take the throne when I should have. And I hate-”

“Stop. Please, stop.”

Kagome pressed herself against his back, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and clinging with all of her trembling strength. The comb fell forgotten from her hand as she pressed her face against his still damp shoulder, tears spilling over hotly onto it.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, her voice shaking around the words. “I’m so sorry, Inuyasha. I’m sorry that you ever had to feel lonely or afraid. I’m sorry that so few people ever tried to understand you. And I am sorry for every person who ever even hinted that you should hate any part of yourself or that any of what happened was your fault.”

“But I have to believe that all of it, every moment, brought you here. Brought you to a place where we could meet, and made you into the person that I know. The person who is strong enough to want to protect people and keep them from suffering. The person I fell in love with. So how can you say that you hate someone that I love so much?”

She could feel Inuyasha tense in her arms and she held him more tightly still, willing him to understand. Slowly his hands came up to grip her arms where they were locked around him. She could feel his hands trembling.

“Kagome…”

His voice cracked around her name, a sound barely above a whisper.

He turned in her arms, forcing her to loosen her hold. Still she clung to him, unwilling to let him go.

His eyes met hers, searching. He lifted his hand to her cheek, clawed thumb swiping at a tear as it tracked down her cheek. She met his eyes, unflinching.

“I love you,” she repeated firmly. “This you, right here. So don’t go away, alright?”

No sooner had the words left her than he levered himself up in her embrace, pressing his lips to hers.

She was forced to release her hold on him as he rose up, hastily pressing her down to the floor beneath him. His lips never left hers as they moved, working against hers with an urgency that bordered on desperation.

His hands made fast work of her clothing, as if he could not reach her skin quickly enough. His hands rover her sides, her hips, her breasts. They slowed only between her thighs, caressing her there with almost painful care until she was slick with need. Even then his lips did not leave hers, swallowing her small cries and pleas as he worked.

At last when she thought she might go mad at the feeling of it he shifted, his lips leaving hers. There was the rustling of fabric as he freed himself from his sashinuki and then she could feel the head of him pressed against her entrance.

He paused then, lifting his eyes to hers. She met his look, offering him a small smile. His eyes slid shut at the sight, his forehead coming down to rest against her own. 

“Kagome, I-”

He cut himself off, his eyes sliding open once more to meet hers. He hesitated, features strained with the effort of some internal struggle. At last she leaned up and kissed him lightly.

“It’s alright, Inuyasha,” she said as she pulled back. “I’m here.”

His eyes slid shut against the words and in one thrust he was inside of her. Kagome gasped, her back arching at the sudden sensation.

“I need you,” he murmured against her throat. “I need you, Kagome.”

He moved against her, body straining as if he could not get close enough. Kagome’s hands came up, questing over any part of him that she could reach. His face, his hair, his ears, his shoulders, the straining muscles of his back. With every touch he pressed more deeply inside of her.

“Kagome,” he murmured, and she could feel his muscles beginning to shudder against her. 

She shifted her hips against his, her eyes fixed on his face as she urged him on. His eyes were fever bright as they met hers, tracing every line of her face in desperate search of something.

“I love you,” she murmured, offering it up to him.

His lips parted, half forming words that he forced back. Instead he thrust harder against her, his head falling forward to murmur her name again and again into the hollow between her neck and shoulder.

A few moments more and he tensed, hips pressed deeply against hers as he found his release. Watching him, Kagome felt her own body shudder. She pressed herself as closely to him as she could get, back arching as the sensation swept through her. 

Slowly the feeling eased, leaving in its wake a warm glow that curled throughout her limbs. Inuyasha hovered just above her, breathing hard as he watched her face with half-lidded eyes. She offered him a small smile.

“I’m fine,” she said, offering the reassurance he always seemed to seek in the aftermath of their encounters. 

He watched her face for a moment longer before appearing to accept the truth of this. He lowered his head to rest against her bare chest, his hair almost dry now as it slipped across her skin like a curtain. Kagome blinked down at the top of his head, slightly surprised at the gesture. 

“As a kid I always broke things,” Inuyasha murmured into her skin. “That’s why my mother’s clan wanted to get rid of me. I never meant to. Things always just break so easy.”

Kagome frowned. Her hand slid down to caress the top of his hand, fingers trailing lightly over his ears. 

“Not everything,” she said. “Some things are almost impossible to break.”

Silence stretched between them, her hands continuing their idle path through his hair and along his scalp. 

“Those kids were idiots,” Inuyasha said suddenly. 

“Kids?” Kagome echoed, her brow furrowing.

“The ones from your village,” he murmured. “The ones who were scared of you. Bunch of little shits. I...I’d have protected you.”

His face was angled away from her and hidden by the curtain of his hair, but the sincerity in the words brought a sudden prickle of tears to her eyes. She swallowed, the feeling thick in her throat.

“Thank you,” she said. “For wanting to protect me.”

He said nothing for a moment, his hand ghosting over her skin until it came to rest atop her hip. His thumb skimmed lightly back and forth over the skin there. 

“I’m gonna protect you, Kagome. Whatever it takes.”


	32. Of Plots and Places

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Super) Mini-history lesson for today:
> 
> -Namasu: sliced raw fish served in a vinegar sauce. The dish was common to the Heian period.

* * *

  
A single shaft of moonlight slanted through the pitch black darkness of the sparsely furnished room, casting deep shadows across the pale features of its occupant.

Kagura’s lips were pressed into a thin line, the otherworldly crimson of her eyes dark as she gazed into her reflection in the small rounded mirror suspended before her. 

Only it was not her reflection that peered back out at her. 

A man’s face, deathly pale and strangely delicate, stared out at her. A dark mass of ink black hair seemed almost to writhe with a life of its own about his face, and his lips were drawn upward in a faint smirk that did not quite reach his murky red eyes. 

“What news do you bring me tonight, Kagura?” the man spoke, his voice a low rumble that sent chills skittering over her flesh.

Kagura was silent, the lines around her mouth deepening for the briefest of moments before she could smooth them back into a semblance of apathy. 

“Rumor has it that the appointments are to be resumed soon,” she said with a small shrug. “Little beyond that.”

The man’s brows rose faintly, interest lightening his eyes to an eerie shade of blood red. 

“They are trying to consolidate their power while they feel that they have the advantage, then,” he said, though more to himself than to her. “It is of little consequence. Let them play at fixing the court if they will. It will only serve to keep them distracted.”

Kagura eyed him, brow furrowing the slightest bit. She shifted, the silk of her juni-hito whispering in the silence of the room. The beam of moonlight slid to illuminate the fan she held in her lap. She considered it for a moment before raising her gaze back to the mirror. 

“Who from among us do you wish to have sent, then, Naraku-sama?” she said lowly. 

“Sent?” the man, Naraku, echoed.

“According to the rumors, they will not be taking the firstborns,” Kagura said, twisting the fan idly between her fingers. “No announcement has been made as yet of how they intend to choose, but should we not prepare ourselves now for that inevitability?”

“Interesting,” Naraku murmured. “Although I suppose I should have expected nothing less of the half-breed and his commoner. Hmmmm, who shall we send, Kagura? Anyone who goes will have unfettered access to the Dairi, after all.”

His eyes slid to her face, his gaze piercing as it attempted to read the lines there. Kagura’s gaze fixed on her fan as it danced between her hands, her expression determinedly impassive. She offered up another small shrug. 

“It is not mine to decide, Naraku-sama,” she drawled. “Do as you will. You always do, do you not?”

“But you do not have even a suggestion for me, Kagura?” Naraku pressed, his gaze never wavering. “No one you would recommend?”

There was the faintest twitch of Kagura’s lips, gone almost before it could be perceived. She slid the fan open slowly, lifting it to hover just beneath her lips.

“Not my mission,” she said. “Not my concern, Naraku-sama.” 

Naraku’s lips curled up faintly. 

“Then consider it now your concern,” he said. “Byakuya will accompany you. You will both continue to report back to me anything that might be of use.”

Kagura frowned, blood red lips curling back in distaste. She slid her fan shut with a resounding snap. 

“As I said, Naraku-sama,” she said. “As of yet we’ve no idea how they intend to choose who will enter the Dairi. As such, how am I to ensure that Byakuya and I will be among the ones chosen?”

“As you said, Kagura,” Naraku returned lowly. “Your mission, your concern. I trust that you will find a way. If not…”

He trailed off, baring his teeth in a grin as he met her eyes meaningfully. Kagura sighed, her eyes sliding closed.

“Of course, Naraku-sama,” she said. “As you wish.”

“Then it is settled,” he said. “Have you anything more to report? What of your observations of the miko and the half-breed?”

“There has been little to observe,” she replied. “Matters appear unchanged between them. Are you certain their relationship is what you believe it to be?”

She kept her eyes carefully fixed on her fan as she spoke, the dark arc of her lashes shielding them from his view. He frowned.

“The hanyou would not have risked what he did in leaving the court for her were it not,” he said.  
“A turn of circumstance we could have taken advantage of, had you not failed so miserably in your duties as my eyes within the court.”

Kagura tensed, the line of her back straightening. Her eyes shifted back to the mirror, her chin tilting up defensively.

“I am not all-seeing, Naraku-sama,” she said. “Besides which, I am hardly the only set of eyes that you have here. What of their failure to-?”

She stopped abruptly, eyes growing wide in her face. Her fan clattered to the floor as her fingers spasmed, her hand jumping to her chest. Her lips fell open around a pained gasp, her entire body jerking.

In the mirror Naraku held something up for her to see, grasped tightly within the cage of his fingers. It was a heart, pumping in a grotesque frenzy as he tightened his grip around it. 

Kagura’s hand jerked furtively towards the mirror as if she could reach through to reclaim it before another surge of agony doubled her over. Naraku smiled thinly, loosening his grip. 

“If I wished to speak of their failures, then I would speak of them,” he said, lifting the fluttering organ as if to examine it more closely. “As one of my eldest, though, you will simply have to learn to bear the brunt of it, Kagura. Now I know you cannot speak when you are like this, so how about you bow and we will consider the matter finished?”

Shaking, Kagura just managed to lift her head enough to look at him. Her eyes narrowed, rage bright as they met his, and her lips drew back from her teeth in a silent snarl. 

Naraku frowned faintly. His hand flexed sharply around the heart, fingers digging hard into the tender flesh.

This time Kagura screamed, her body falling forward to half-sprawl against the floor. Her hands, splayed before her, clawed convulsively at the wood beneath them. 

“I supposed that will do well enough,” Naraku said musingly.

He lowered his hand, the heart disappearing beyond the edge of the mirror’s frame. For several long moments there was only the sound of Kagura’s labored breathing. Slowly her hands curled into fists, trembling where they pressed against the floor. 

“Are you ready to behave again?” he said.

“...Of course, Naraku-sama.”

Kagura made no move to lift her head.

“Good,” he said, though there was no real pleasure in the word. “Then we are finished here for tonight. Kanna, close the mirror.”

Something like mist began to spread slowly over the surface of the mirror, obscuring Naraku’s face.

“Wait, Naraku-sama.”

The mist stilled, then slowly began to pull back. Naraku’s image re-emerged, a faint frown edging his lips. 

Kagura pushed herself up from the floor. Her skin had blanched so pale that it was ghostly in the faint light of the moon. Her eyes were shuttered, betraying nothing as she reached up absently to wipe at a trail of blood dribbling from one corner of her lips. 

“What of Kanna?” she said. “When I enter the Dairi my movements will be restricted. It will be difficult for me to report back to you what I observe there.”

“Then find a way to take her with you,” he said, eyes narrowing. “And know that if you dare to call me back here again tonight without cause, Kagura, I will not be in such a forgiving mood.”

“Of course, Naraku-sama,” Kagura said, the smallest upward quirk to the corner of her lips. “So long as Kanna has your permission.”

The mist appeared once more, spreading more quickly across the surface of the mirror. In moments his image was obscured entirely, but not before Kagura reached out to trail two bloody fingers in a jagged red line across it. 

* * *

Kagome gasped, jerking abruptly into full consciousness. Her heart pulsed a frantic tattoo in her ears as she lifted a trembling hand to hover before her face. It was difficult to tell in the darkness of the room, but there was no trace there of the blood she could have sworn was on her hands.

“Kagome?” came Inuyasha’s voice, close enough that she could feel the warmth of his breath against her ear. “What is it? Are you alright?”

She could feel the muscles of his body tense against her side. She felt the whisper of his hair sliding against her skin as he levered himself up on his forearm beside her. 

Golden eyes met hers, bright with some internal light of their own, and Kagome felt some of the panic go out of her. 

“I’m fine,” she said, eyeing her hand one last time. “Just a nightmare, I think.”

She could just make out his frown as his eyes skimmed her face.

“You have a lot of those,” he said. It was not a question. 

“It’s fine, Inuyasha,” she said, her eyes sliding away from his. She tucked her hand back at her side, though the faint sensation of cloying stickiness lingered on the skin there.

His frown deepened. He reached out, grabbing the hand she had been eyeing and tugging her towards him. 

He leaned back against the futon-when had they moved there, she wondered idly-tugging and twisting until she rested tucked firmly against his side, her torso half-splayed atop his. His free hand came to rest at the crown of her head, pressing with gentle insistentence until her ear was directly against the pulse of his heart. The sound rushed in her ears, slow and strong like waves lapping against the shore.

“Just focus on the sound,” he murmured. “It always put me to sleep when I was just a brat.”

“Your mother?” Kagome said, the steady sound already beginning to lull her.

“Mmm,” he said, and she could hear the sound reverberate through his chest.

He flexed the hand resting on her hand idly, claws grazing gently through her hair and along her scalp. Kagome felt her eyelids begin to grow heavy, the gentle thrum and the soothing gesture pulling her under.

“Thank you,” she managed before allowing herself to drift off.

“I’ve got you, Kagome.”

Break

“Could you repeat that?”

Inuyasha scowled, his lower lip protruding almost petulantly as his eyes slid away from hers. He crossed his arms over his chest, huffing as a faint red crept across his cheeks.

“You heard me!” he snapped.

“I never said I didn’t hear you,” Kagome said, a grin curling up the corners of her lips. “I would just like you to say it again.”

She leaned partially over the low wooden table that separated them, prodding gently at him with a single finger. She raised her brows, some small part of her reveling in the hanyou’s obvious annoyance. He swatted lightly at her hand, peering at her from the corner of his eye.

Her hair was still sleep-mussed, popping up in odd places against her head and draping in dark tangles over her shoulders. To his quiet disappointment she had chosen to redress, donning her rumpled white karaginu. The garment was slung almost carelessly about her frame, drooping to bare one pale shoulder to the morning light. Her eyes were brightening slowly to full wakefulness as she looked at him and there was the faintest trail of dried drool at the left corner of her mouth from her sleep.

Kagome in this groggy and entirely unguarded state, the hanyou had found, was the Kagome that he had the least resistance to.

He sighed, his eyes sliding shut.

“Fine,” he bit out. “I said I need your help, alright? Happy?”

Her grin bloomed into a full-blown smile, her eyes practically glowing. She sat back on her heels, nodding.

“Very,” she said. 

“Then will you eat already?” he said, gesturing to the mass of dishes laid out between them on the table. “You’ve barely touched anything.”

“Only if you will tell me what exactly it is that you need my help with,” she said as she took up her hashi obligingly. 

Inuyasha eyed her for a moment, slumping to rest his weight on his hands as he leaned back from the table. She made a show of picking up some rice and bringing it to her lips as if to urge him on. He frowned, reaching forward to grab a piece of pickled vegetable and toss it into his mouth. 

“It’s the wolf,” he murmured around the mouthful, not quite able to meet her eyes. “I need you to come with me to see the bastard.”

Kagome paused with a piece of fish suspended halfway to her mouth, blinking. Her expression sobered as she set her hashi down.

“What do you mean?” she said warily. 

The last time she had been to see the Wolf Lord...she flushed, recalling exactly how that encounter had ended. She had not even gotten the chance to finish speaking with him before Inuyasha had dragged her off, to say nothing of what had occurred after that.

Besides which, Inuyasha had never once sought out Kouga before. The two had never done anything but fight ever since their very first encounter. So why in the world would he wish to seek him out now?

Inuyasha leaned more heavily against his palms, further distancing himself from the table and herself. His eyes shuttered, his gaze sliding off to a corner of the room. His lips twisted in a faint grimace.

“Look,” he said, the word heavy with reluctance. “The wolf is a moron and a flea-bitten bastard and a fucking pain and-”

“Inuyasha,” Kagome said warningly.

“What I’m tryin’ to say is the bastard’s fast, alright?” Inuyasha huffed, even the slight admission paining him. 

“Was that what you were trying to say?” said Kagome, raising one incredulous brow. 

Inuyasha shot her a pointed look, his scowl deepening.

“And what does Kouga-sama being fast have to do with anything?” Kagome pressed.

Inuyasha huffed once more, falling back into a full sprawl against the floor. 

“He’s faster than any youkai I’ve seen before,” came the hanyou’s voice from below the line of the table. “And we need to get the supplies and shit we promised to the villages out fast. They’re counting on it. So…”

He trailed off. Kagome blinked, mentally filling in the words he could not quite bring himself to say aloud.

Kouga was incredibly fast. She had seen his speed, almost twice that of most youkai, demonstrated on numerous occasions. As a youkai he was also strong enough to move large amounts of supplies at a time.

If he were to take over the distribution of supplies to the villages, it could likely be done in hardly any time at all. Then it would only be a matter of Inuyasha choosing trusted governors to go out to the provinces and begin working with the villagers. 

Kagome leaned to the side, peering beneath the table to try and get a look at the hanyou’s face. His hands were beneath his head, his ears pinned back so far that they almost disappeared amidst the silver of his hair. 

“You want Kouga-sama to help us get the supplies out to the villages,” she said, watching his face.

She could see his jaw clench. 

“Yeah,” he said after a moment. “We need to get the supplies out as soon as we can so that the villagers will have the best chance possible in case…”

He trailed off once more, but she understood well enough. Another nation had been involved somehow with Naraku in his plot to kill Inuyasha’s father and mother. Mysterious ships were somewhere off the coast. The Chinese Emperor knew of what Inuyasha had done and had little love for him. The more quickly they could strengthen the villages and their connections to them, the better.

“You’ve really been thinking about this, haven’t you?” she said softly.

That he would even consider asking Kouga showed clearly how serious he was.

“Keh,” he said. “I said I would figure it out, didn’t I?”

Kagome nodded, more to herself than to him. He had promised her that he would and a quiet pride warmed her at the thought that he truly was willing to do whatever it took to make sure that the villagers and the court were taken care of.

She reached a hand out beneath the table, tugging lightly at the ankle of his sashinuki. His foot twitched and he shot her a faint glare. She smiled.

“I’m really proud of you, you know?” Kagome said. “You’ve come a long way, to be able to ask Kouga-sama for help.”

She could see a faint flush rise on his cheeks as he turned away from her. He shifted, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Keh. I’ll still rip his fucking arms off if he even looks at you wrong.”

Kagome’s smile dimmed instantly.

“Maybe not such a long way, then,” she muttered to herself, and then, to him, “When do you propose that we go to see him?”

“Sooner the better,” Inuyasha replied, levering himself back up to eye a few of the dishes. “The bastard’s been itching to go since he got here, so it’s about time we let him.”

He reached out and grabbed a bowl of faintly steaming soup, lifting it to his lips and drinking it down in several large slurps. Kagome raised a brow, eyeing him. 

“You’re not doing this just to keep Kouga-sama away from the court, are you?” she said. 

He set the bowl down, reaching for another dish with a slight shrug.

“Doesn’t hurt,” he muttered.

Kagome sighed, but chose not to comment further. Though his motivations were not quite as pure as she might have hoped, he was not exactly wrong. The sooner Kouga could be on his way, the better it was likely to be for all three of them. 

And the Wolf Lord was not the only matter that would be best addressed sooner rather than later. Kagome grabbed a bowl of namasu, stirring it with her hashi as she watched Inuyasha from beneath her lashes.

He seemed to be in good spirits. Eating always did put him at his ease, and if he was willing even to speak of Kouga then now might very well be her best chance of catching him while he was most receptive. She took a few bites, chewing slowly as she mentally braced herself.

She set the bowl down as she swallowed, taking a deep breath.

“Inuyasha,” she said, diverting his attention from the food. “There is something that I need your help with, as well.”

The hanyou, his cheeks rounded with the amount of food he had attempted to pack in all at once, paused. His gaze narrowed suspiciously at the shift in her tone.

“Wi’ wha’?” he said, words distorted around the mouthful. She winced. 

“Well,” she said, folding her hands together in her lap. “I know that we have spoken of it a bit previously, but I have had something of a revelation concerning the appointments that I thought you would-”

A choking sound brought her up short. She blinked, watching as Inuyasha struggled to force down his over-ambitious mouthful. His face reddened slightly, his brows drawing sharply downward.

“Not this shit again!” he gasped as soon as he was able, his hand coming down hard enough against the wood of the table to rattle several dishes. “Kagome, if you think for one fucking moment you can force me to-to-!”

“I am not trying to force you to do anything, Inuyasha,” she cut in, holding up a hand to forestall him. “Please, just hear me out on this.  
I really do need your help here.”

This appeared to cool some of his ire, a bit of the tension going out of his features. Still his eyes were sharp with the promise of an argument should she press him.

“Thank you,” Kagome said when he had been silent a moment. “I know this isn’t easy for you. And you know it...it hasn’t been easy for me, either, to have to think about...well, suffice it to say that we both have a great deal that we will have to come to terms with.”

She paused, the ache in her chest momentarily stealing her words. She could see Inuyasha bristling, golden eyes bright. She shook her head.

“However, I do not think that that matter is our most pressing concern,” Kagome continued. “I think that we can move forward with the appointments for now and in time we can...revisit the question of a successor.”

Inuyasha blinked, his expression shifting warily. 

“What’re you saying, Kagome?” 

“Only that we push forward with the appointments to continue securing your place here within the court and your ties with the courtiers,” she said. “And then, beyond that…”

She trailed off, her hands twisting in her lap. ‘Beyond that’ was certainly a bridge neither of them wished to cross, but in time they would reach it whether they wished it or not. All she could hope was that time might reconcile the both of them to it somehow. 

“I won’t choose one of them,” Inuyasha said, his eyes fixed steadily on her. 

Kagome averted her eyes, an ache sweeping through her at that steady gaze. 

“I’m not asking you to,” she said softly.

“Not right now,” Inuyasha said. “But that doesn’t change it and I won’t do it. I know you think that’s the only path there is, but if it is then fuck it. I’ll carve a new one for us to walk.”

Kagome peered up at him from beneath her lashes, the certainty in his voice catching her. His gaze remained fixed on her face, his jaw set stubbornly. She had seen this look before. When he had torn down the screen before the entire court. When he had formed the barrier. It was not a look to be taken lightly.

She found herself smiling faintly even as a chill of trepidation swept through her. 

“I trust you to do what’s best, Inuyasha,” was all that she could manage.

“Kagome…”

Kagome shook her head, forcing a smile back onto her face. 

“Never mind all that right now,” she said, a part of her scared of what the conversation might bring should she allow it to go on. “For the time being let’s focus on the appointments themselves, shall we? I was speaking to Chūsei-san yesterday and I believe we have managed to come up with an idea as to how to go about them!”

She saw his ears droop slightly, saw the disappointment that dimmed his gaze as she hastily steered them back onto safer ground. He shifted, crossing his arms over his chest. She felt a small twinge, but forced it back. Neither of them could afford to indulge in fantasies here.

“What’s that?” he said.

“It’s to do with the network that Chūsei-san has put together,” Kagome said, forcing herself to press on. “I was trying to think of the best way to go about choosing courtiers to fill the appointments when Chūsei-san made me realize that who is in a better position to observe them than the servants?”

“Servants?” Inuyasha echoed, cocking one dark brow.

Kagome nodded, warming to the idea once more.

“Just think of it,” she said, spreading her hands in an expansive gesture. “The servants watch the courtiers their whole lives. They tend to their needs, they see them at their best and at their worst. A person wears their truest face when they feel they have nothing to either gain or lose, as with the servants. And is that not what you would want, someone who is fair and kind even when there is nothing to be gained from it?”

Inuyasha’s brow furrowed as he considered this. He nodded.

“I get it,” he said. “That’s pretty bright, Kagome.”

Kagome’s smile widened. She had known he would approve of the idea.

“Chūsei-san has already agreed to it,” she said. “Now it is just a matter of her approaching the others to see if they are willing, as well.”

Inuyasha nodded. 

“Then we just need to create a cover for them,” he said thoughtfully. “Something to make the courtiers think we’re the ones doing the choosing so that nothing comes back on them. And then we can throw some sort of banquet to announce everything. The courtiers always eat that shit up.”

“Then you agree?” Kagome said. “We will proceed with the appointments?”

Inuyasha’s look shuttered somewhat. 

“We can bring them in,” he said. “But I ain’t making any promises beyond that.”

Kagome held up her hands, splaying them before her. 

“That is all that I will ask,” she said. “At least for now.”

Inuyasha sighed, his eyes sliding closed.

“Then bring let’s bring the fucking bastards in.”

* * *

The pair finished off the remainder of their morning meal with only minimal bickering before deciding that a walk about court on the way to the Wolf Lord’s temporary residence would be the best way to proceed. 

Both readied and dressed themselves for the day. Kagome was silently thankful that for once her chest bindings had managed to escape the hanyou’s claws unscathed and that she was able to tolerably straighten out her miko robes from the previous day, though the quandary of how they could possibly continue on in this manner gnawed at her. 

She was both grateful and alarmed to see as they left his chambers that at some point in the night Inuyasha had dismissed his guard. He hardly needed them, he said, laying a hand meaningfully on Tessaiga’s hilt. Besides which if he had allowed them to remain throughout the night they inevitably would have seen her emerging from a night spent in his chambers. 

For the discretion Kagome was grateful, but she could not help chastising him for the recklessness of leaving himself open to attack. There was also the fact that the guards could only be dismissed so many times before even they, loyal as she knew them to be, would begin to grow suspicious.

Inuyasha turned his nose up at this, refusing to address it beyond insisting that they would be fine. Eventually Kagome was forced to drop it, well aware that she was just as lacking as he was in ways to handle their current situation that did not end in the two of them being forced to separate.

Instead she reached out silently, grasping his hand. He shot her a surprised glance, flushing faintly as his hand curled around her own. They remained that way until they reached the outer gate of the Dairi and Kagome was forced to slip her hand back into the folds of her sleeves. Inuyasha said nothing, but his hand lingered as if he would have held on.

With a few curses muttered under the hanyou’s breath, the two made their way out into the streets of the court. They had agreed to go for a few turns about the more crowded streets as it had been some time since the two of them had been able to appear in public together and they felt it important to continue to present a united front. 

It occurred to Kagome as they started out that the last time they had done this Kikyou had walked between them. She experienced a twinge as the phantom of the woman surfaced in her mind’s eye, though it was hard to say whether the pain she felt was more on Kikyou’s behalf or Inuyasha’s. 

From the corner of her eye she saw a shadow pass over Inuyasha’s expression, and the thought that his thoughts ran much along the same path as her own provided cold comfort. A sudden distance seemed to grow up between them. She held the feeling to herself like stinging salve to a wound, trying to remind herself forcefully that this was the true order of things between them despite whatever fleeting fling they might be indulging themselves in at the moment.

Courtiers approached and she forced a smile, though it was as hollow as the feeling in the pit of her stomach.

The courtiers who approached them on the stroll were deferential in manner and polite in address. Fans swept in gestures of interest and respect towards the both of them. Inquiries were made as to Kagome’s health, Inuyasha’s thoughts on who might be best suited for the appointments, when they might expect the next court banquet to be held. All mild, all with a seeming reverence that was both slightly disconcerting and encouraging to see. 

At one point Kagome thought she caught a glimpse of Kagura lurking just at the edge of a larger group of courtiers, but if she had been there she was gone before the miko could turn her head. Beyond that there was no sign of the Taira to be seen. 

After making several circuits through the busier streets, the two at last decided-largely out  
of mutual exhaustion-that that would suffice for the time being. They cut down a smaller side street and made their way towards the Wolf Lord’s temporary residence.

Absently Kagome wished for a fan as they crossed the threshold of the building. The cloying heat of summer was fast wrapping itself around the court and the sun’s rays were relentless as it sat directly overhead.

Nor did the encounter looming before her do much to cool the sweat that she could feel beginning to collect along her upper lip and at the nape of her neck. Her hand twitched with the desire to reach out to Inuyasha for support, but she hastily tucked it back into her sleeve. 

At first glance the residence appeared empty, the main sitting room unoccupied and not a sound to be heard to indicate that anyone was around. As Kagome moved to check the small adjacent room, though, Inuyasha shook his head.

“Garden,” he said simply, a slight twitch of his nose indicating that he had caught the youkai’s scent.

Kagome nodded, gesturing for him to lead the way. He headed towards the shoji opposite them in the room, sliding it open with an unceremonious clatter.

On the other side was revealed a small central garden, boxed in on all sides by the covered walkways of the residence. 

Kouga sat on the walkway farthest from them, bare feet dangling in the pond that dominated most of the small garden. He looked up as the shoji slid open, blue eyes wideningNJ.

He looked...small somehow. His hair hung in lank ink-blank strands around his face-the only time Kagome could ever recall having seen it outside of its traditional high tail-and there were dark circles beneath his eyes visible even from where she stood. His skin appeared sallow, his shoulders slumped.

Kagome’s heart caught in her throat as his eyes met her own, any greeting she might have thought to give dying on her lips. 

Inuyasha looked from her to Kouga, a scowl creeping over his face like thunder clouds moving to hide the sun. He crossed his arms, shifting so that Kagome’s smaller frame was partially blocked by his own.

“Oi, wolf, we have business,” he said tersely. Kagome shot him a warning glance.

Kouga’s eyes, however, did not leave her face. He rose, standing ankle deep in the pond. 

“Are you alright?” he said.

Kagome blinked, uncertain what he meant, when it suddenly occurred to her what the end of their last encounter must have looked like to him. Inuyasha had dragged her off abruptly and rather forcefully, leaving Kouga with no explanation whatsoever for days. She raised a hand to her mouth, mortification heating her face. 

“I am fine, Kouga-sama. I apologize-”

“As if I would let anything happen to Kagome,” Inuyasha snapped, eyes flashing. “Kagome is-!”

“Your woman,” Kouga finished, his words cutting across the hanyou’s despite how softly they were spoken. “For real now, by the smell of it.”

Both Kagome and Inuyasha froze, eyes going wide. For a moment Kagome could process nothing beyond the shock of the fact that he knew.

Kouga’s eyes shifted from her face to Inuyasha’s, narrowing. He shifted, crossing his arms over the leather armor that covered his chest.

“Was that supposed to be some sort of secret, mutt?” he said, turning a hard look on the hanyou. “Well, think again, dumbass. Even you should know enough to know nothing gets past a wolf’s nose. And if you’re trying to keep Kagome as some sort of mistress-!”

“Shut up, you flea-bitten bastard!” Inuyasha shouted. “You don’t know shit about it and Kagome is none of your business!”

He took a threatening step forward, ears flattening back against his head as one hand shifted to grasp Tessaiga’s hilt. Kouga bared his teeth in return, arms dropping to his sides as his fists clenched. 

Kagome stepped forward hastily, extending an arm to block Inuyasha’s path as she met his eyes in a warning look. 

“Stop it,” she said. “Both of you. I refuse to be argued over as if I weren’t even here.”

She shifted her gaze to Kouga. 

“Kouga-sama, you are not...wrong,” she said, wincing inwardly at the brief flash of pain she could see in his face at the words. “Inuyasha and I...things have changed between us in some ways. In others, though, they remain the same. It is a complicated matter and I would appreciate it greatly if word of it did not go beyond the three of us here.”

Kouga eyed her for a long moment, the tension in his features easing into a scowl. After a moment his eyes slid shut and he turned his face away from her. 

“Keh,” he scoffed softly. “Who would I even tell?”

Kagome took a small step forward, half reaching out a hand toward him though she knew he was beyond her reach. She had hoped that she would be able through this meeting to somehow finally make peace between herself and Kouga, but it seemed that she was doomed to do nothing but hurt him. 

“I’m sorry, Kouga,” she said softly. “For more things than I can say. I did not intend for you to find out this way.”

The Wolf Lord glanced at her from the corner of his eye, the line of his mouth tightening. And then suddenly all of the fight seemed to go out of him, his shoulders sagging and the tension in his jaw easing. He sighed.

“It’s fine, Kagome,” he said, shaking his head. “It’s not like I haven’t known you were into the mutt for a while now, though the kami only know why. I just won’t stand for that bastard treating you like you’re some kind of dirty secret.”

“Oi!” Inuyasha snapped, stepping forward until she could feel the sleeves of his haori brushing against the back of her robes. “I’m right here, asshole!”

Kagome reached out, placing a hand on his arm. She could feel his gaze on her face, but kept hers on Kouga. 

“I promise that that is not the case,” she said. “And even if it were, I assure you that I am more than capable of handling myself.”

Kouga cocked his head, gaze trailing over her and sliding to Inuyasha as if to assess the truth of this. Inuyasha’s hand found hers, wrapping itself around hers possessively. Kouga’s gaze fixed on the entwined appendages and Kagome saw something like acceptance darken his gaze. 

The Wolf Lord sighed again, more dramatically this time, flopping back to reseat himself on the edge of the walkway. 

“I know,” Kouga said. “I trust you, Kagome. Though I still think your taste in lovers is pretty messed up.”

Kagome smiled wryly, her stomach slowly beginning to unknot at the look on his face. She heard a faint rumbling growl begin in Inuyasha’s throat and she squeezed his hand as it began to tense around her own. 

“Thank you,” she said. 

“We’re friends, aren’t we?” said Kouga, shrugging.

Kagome’s smile widened as she realized that yes, perhaps they finally, truly were.

She moved forward to the edge of the walkway on her side, dragging the tense hanyou along with her. She sat down on the edge, tugging at Inuyasha’s hand until he reluctantly joined her. He eyed the youkai across from them darkly, but thankfully managed to hold himself back from making any further remarks.

“So you said you had business,” Kouga said, dark brows quirking as he moved his hands to rest atop the edge of the walkway beneath him. “If it isn’t about dog shit here trying to assert his claim on you, what is it?”

Inuyasha bristled and Kagome could see the slightest twitch developing above his left brow. After a moment, though, he appeared to force the impulse back as if swallowing something particularly unpleasant, his mouth curling downward in disgust. She squeezed his hand, silently impressed to see this degree of restraint from him. 

“It’s about the villages,” the hanyou was able to force out. “You were with them out there, right?”

Kouga nodded, his own brows lifting slightly as Inuyasha failed to take the bait. 

“Then you know all about the terms they agreed to and what we promised ‘em,” he said. “Now’s the time we need to start making good on those promises and we need to do it soon. That’s where you come in.”

Kouga cocked his head slightly, his expression sobering. 

“Come in how?” he said, wariness creeping into his tone.

“You are the fastest youkai either of us knows of, Kouga-sama,” Kagome put in, leaning forward. “I know it’s a great deal to ask of you-to say nothing of how much I have asked of you already-but you would be our best chance of getting the promised supplies out to the villages quickly.”

“What’s with the sudden hurry?” the youkai said, his gaze shifting from her face to Inuyasha’s. 

Inuyasha looked to Kagome, a question in his eyes. She hesitated for only a moment before nodding. 

“The tale is more long and complicated than I can tell,” she said. “But suffice it to say that we have an enemy that has been working very hard to ensure that the court remains in chaos until he can take power for himself. We also believe he is conspiring with another nation to plan an attack from outside. We need the villages to have the necessary tools and resources to defend themselves should...should the worst happen. So, please, Kouga-sama…”

She trailed off, holding his gaze for a long moment before leaning forward to bow at the waist. She felt Inuyasha shift beside her, leaning more closely against her side.

“You’ve got your clan to think about,” came the hanyou’s voice, and she sat up to look at him. “But we’ve got ours we gotta think about, too. The villages. The court. We’ve all got people we wanna protect. And if you help us protect ours, then we can help you protect yours. So…”

And then he leaned forward, placing his hands on his thighs, and bowed his head. 

Kagome’s hand shot out, grasping reflexively at the wood of the walkway to keep herself from slipping off of the edge in her surprise. Kouga’s mouth fell open. 

The silence stretched and Inuyasha sat up hastily, face reddening as he shot a glare at both of them. He spun to face Kouga and the youkai flinched slightly.

“So?” the hanyou blustered. “What’ll it be, asshole?”

Kagome fought the urge to hide her face in her hands, her eyes sliding closed. He had been so close there for a moment.

“Uh,” said Kouga, and Kagome could see the struggle in his face as he attempted to recover from the emotional whiplash of it. “I guess if you put it like that...sure, I’ll do it.”

Kagome blinked.

“You will?” she said, unable to keep the surprise from her voice.

Kouga shrugged.

“The mutt’s an asshole, but he isn’t wrong,” he said. “If there’s really an attack coming and I ignore it now, it’ll eventually come back to bite my pack in the ass either way. If I can help shore up the villages, then they’ll be there to help fight so my pack doesn’t have to shoulder the brunt of it. Besides, I’m fast enough that it shouldn’t take me too long and then I’ll be back with them.”

A smile stretched across Kagome’s face and she reached out to grab Inuyasha’s hand, giving it a celebratory squeeze in her excitement. 

“Thank you, Kouga-sama,” she said. “For everything, really, but especially for this. It means a great deal to us.”

She nudged Inuyasha lightly, darting a meaningful look from him to Kouga when he turned his gaze to hers. He rolled his eyes at her, but turned nonetheless to face the Wolf Lord.

“Thanks, Kouga,” he said with only a minimal amount of his usual surliness. “It really is important.”

Kouga cocked his head, his dark brows lifting. Shifting forward, he rose to stand. He placed his hands on his hips, his tail flicking behind him as a sudden grin curled up one corner of his lips. 

“Sure,” he said lightly. “And all I ask in return is that you give me Kagome.”

Stunned silence filled the garden, so thick that force of it almost seemed to put a halt to everything.

In a blur of red and silver Inuyasha shot up and across the width of the small garden. Kouga just barely managed to jump out of the way as Inuyasha’s fist came down, splintering the wood of the walkway and sending up a wave of water from the pond. 

The Wolf Lord smirked, fangs peeking out just over his lower lips as he landed and sunk into a crouch. Several dark strands of his hair slipped messily over his shoulders as he gestured for the hanyou to come at him.

“What?” he taunted. “Didn’t you say it was important? A real ruler has to be able to make sacrifices, so just hand her over and I’ll take care of her.”

“Fuck off!” Inuyasha roared, swinging to face him. “Kagome’s a person, not some fucking piece of property! And if you think for one fucking moment that I’d ever let a bastard like you anywhere near her-!”

His hand curled around Tessaiga’s hilt and Kagome felt a crackle of youki along her spiritual sense as he slid the blade free of its sheath. Her eyes widened and she stumbled to her feet, reaching out a hand even as she knew she could not make it to them quickly enough.

Kouga dove forward, catching Inuyasha’s hand and forcing it to halt just short of fully unsheathing the blade. His other hand swung up in an arc, his fist connecting solidly with the side of Inuyasha’s head.

The hanyou fell with a splash into the shallow pond. Kouga’s foot came down on his chest, pinning him there as the Wolf Lord loomed over him.

“I figured as much,” Kouga said lowly. 

Sputtering, Inuyasha shook his head to clear the water from his eyes. He raised a clawed hand, knuckles popping as he prepared to strike.

Kouga grinned.

He shifted, removing his foot and reaching down to offer his hand to Inuyasha. Inuyasha froze, gaping up at him as if he had grown a second head. 

“Hah?” 

“I figured as much,” Kouga repeated. “I just had to make sure. If I’m gonna leave Kagome with you I gotta at least know you’re serious. ‘Sides, only an absolute shitstain of a leader would barter with anyone from his pack, so it’s good to know you ain’t that bad.”

Inuyasha’s gaze traveled from the other man’s face to the proffered hand, his eyes narrowing. He slapped the hand away from him, scrabbling to sit up. His hakama and haori ballooned out around him in the water, his fringe plastered to his face and dripping water into his burning golden eyes.

“That was a fucking test?” he ground out. “I was about to cut you in half, you fucking moron!”

Kouga shrugged, pushing some hair back from his face nonchalantly. 

“You’d have to be able to catch me first, dog shit.”

“Catch this!”

Inuyasha reared back, planting his foot squarely into Kouga’s gut. The Wolf Lord’s eyes went wide as he doubled over, staggering a step back before sitting down hard in the water.

Kagome ran the rest of the way to the edge of the pond, poised to try and intervene. Kouga merely held his stomach, though, eyeing Inuyasha from beneath the dark edge of his fringe.

“Maybe I…deserved that,” he wheezed. 

“You definitely did,” said Kagome and Inuyasha in unison.

Inuyasha rose, his clothes and hair streaming water. He glanced down at himself, grimacing, before his gaze slid to Kouga. He huffed out a sigh before bending to offer his hand. 

“I get it, though,” he said. “But if you ever question me about Kagome again I’ll rip your fucking tail off and jam it down your throat, get it?”

Kouga grinned, reaching out to grasp his hand. Inuyasha levered him up and the two stood ankle-deep in the water, a begrudging respect in their faces as they appraised one another. Two sopping wet messes, Kagome reflected as she pressed a hand to her head.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way, dog breath,” Kouga replied. “Just so long as I can leave knowing she’s safe.”

“Keh,” Inuyasha scoffed without real venom. “Just so long as you finally leave at all. But...I’ll protect her. You have my word.”

Kouga nodded, his gaze sliding to Kagome. His grin faded. 

“Then I think it’s time to go,” he said, more to her than to him. 

“Now?” Kagome said, brows rising. “Don’t you want to dry off? You could at least-”

But he was shaking his head before she could finish the thought. 

“It’s now, Kagome,” he said. “It’s time to finally say good-bye.”

Sloshing his way through and up out of the pond, he moved to stand before her. A small pang went through her as she saw the sudden solemnity in his face, her hands curling at her sides. 

“You really do need to dry off,” she murmured, uncertain what else to say. 

Kouga scoffed softly.

“I’ll be fine,” he said. “Worry about yourself. You’re the one who’s gonna be stuck here with him.”

He jerked a thumb over his shoulder in Inuyasha’s direction. Kagome frowned.

“Oi!” came Inuyasha’s voice, though he made no move to approach. “I can fucking hear you!”

Kagome sighed, shaking her head. She reached into the front of her robes, pulling forth several pieces of parchment rolled together and bearing the Tennō’s seal. She held them out to Kouga.

“Inuyasha’s been working on these,” she said. “They contain the maps of where to find the villages that need the supplies and what they need brought to them, though at some point you will also have to track down the Tachibana group as they are still out there working on the mission. Haru is still with them, so if you search for his scent you should be able to find them.”

“The documents also contain instructions on where in the court the supplies can be found and a letter from the Tennō allowing the holder free passage as his Majesty’s servant.”

“Hah,” Kouga scoffed. “I’m no one’s servant, least of all his.”

Still he reached out, his hand brushing hers as he took the missives. One corner of his lips tipped up ruefully. 

“I’m gonna miss you,” he said. 

“We’ll see each other again,” she said. “This is hardly good-bye forever.”

His eyes traced her face, the look in them darkening. He shook his head, his eyes sliding shut.

“I know,” he said softly. “But it’s good-bye to this part. To the part where I really loved you.”

Kagome felt her breath hitch in her throat, a sudden tightness there. She forced herself to swallow past it, reaching out to grab his empty hand. 

“Thank you,” she said. “For feeling the way you did about me. Thank you for always trying to do right by me. It is time to say good-bye to that part, but maybe that means we can finally welcome the part where we are friends in truth. If you’ll have me, that is.”

Kouga’s hand wrapped around her own, tugging her forward into his embrace. She winced at the feel of wet fur against her face, but allowed herself to be held there. His arms came up around her, his chin resting atop her head. 

“Of course I’ll have you, dummy,” he murmured against her hair. 

She smiled, resting her forehead against the damp leather of his chest armor. 

“Then take care of yourself until the next time I see you,” she said. 

He snorted, his arms tightening about her

“You’re one to talk,” he said. “I still remember the woman who thought she could take down a whole mountain full of bird youkai on her own.”

“Hey!” she said indignantly. “I came pretty close, didn’t I?”

A low growl sounded from behind them before Kouga could answer. Kagome tensed, suddenly recalling the hanyou standing not far from them. She shifted, peeking warily around Kouga’s arm. 

Inuyasha still stood in the pond as if rooted there, ears pinned back as he shot Kouga a glare that might have sent another man fleeing. Surprisingly, though, he made no move towards them. 

Kagome blinked, realizing that he was trying to give her the chance to say her farewells. She offered him a small, grateful smile before tilting her head back to meet Kouga’s eyes. 

“Time’s up, huh?” he said. She nodded.

“You know you’ll always have a place with my pack, right?” he said, his eyes searching hers. “As a friend, if you ever need it.”

Kagome smiled, nodding once more. 

“I appreciate it,” she said softly. “But for better or for worse, my home is wherever he is.”

Kouga’s eyes searched hers, finding the truth of this. He brought a hand up to her face, one clawed thumb tracing the line of her smile. 

“Good for you,” he murmured, leaning down to press a chaste kiss to her forehead. “Good-bye, Kagome.”

“Good-bye, Kouga.”

Kouga shifted, the feel of him against her vanishing abruptly. She blinked as Inuyasha landed where he had just stood, his patience obviously having been strained to its limit. The hanyou wrapped a possessive arm about her, pressing her to his side. Kagome frowned, feeling the water from the sleeves of his haori soaking her robes even further. 

“Still too slow, dog shit!” Kouga called, alighting on the walkway opposite them.

“Just hurry the fuck up and leave already, you stupid wolf!” Inuyasha shouted, fangs flashing. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Kouga said, rolling his eyes. “Just watch out for Kagome, alright? And if I ever catch wind of you even thinking about hurting her, I’ll be back to kick your ass so fast it’ll knock the dog stench off your ancestors!”

He grinned wolfishly, tossing a wave to Kagome. She only just managed to lift her hand to wave in return when a gale kicked up, forcing her to shield her eyes. When the wind subsided, Kouga was gone.

Kagome pushed back the hair that had fallen into her eyes, looking after him. She reached out, grabbing Inuyasha’s sodden haori as a bittersweet mixture of heartache and closure swept over her. Inuyasha ceased swearing under his breath, glancing at her.

“Kagome?”

“Sorry,” she murmured, lifting her free hand to swipe at her eyes. “I just...I’m glad we could be friends in the end. He really is a good person.”

Inuyasha glanced from her to the place where Kouga had just been, some of the irritation leaving his expression. His arm tightened around her, pressing her close.

“...Yeah.”

* * *

The sun was beginning to set as they departed Kouga’s temporary residence which Kagome was thankful for as it made sneaking back to the Dairi easier. Inuyasha was in no fit state to be seen as even after shaking himself thoroughly he still looked like a soggy mess, and Kagome wanted to avoid encountering any further courtiers lest they be able to detect the change in her scent as Kouga had so easily done. 

Inuyasha attempted to assure her that only youkai like himself and Kouga who both had strong noses and knew her scent well would be able to smell any difference, but this did not stop her from chastising him for most of the ride on his back back to the Dairi for failing to warn her. 

She insisted he drop her off at the Chūgū’s residence that she might bathe and put in an appearance so that the servants there would not grow worried. Inuyasha reluctantly agreed after she made it clear she was not budging on the matter, departing to head back to his own chambers.

The servants greeted her return warmly, asking if they could prepare for her her sleeping clothes or a meal if she had not yet eaten. She surprised them by asking for a bath to be readied instead.  
It was late in the day, after all, and she usually despised the fuss that bathing in the court entailed. Still they went to work readily on preparing it for her and it was not long before she was sinking into the perfumed waters.

The women made idle talk as they helped to wash her and Kagome was careful to let slip that she had spent the previous night at the Tachibana residence lest rumors begin to grow up around her absence. She had a number of acquaintances among the Tachibana beyond Sango and it did not seem too far-fetched that she should be asked to stay the night there.

The mention of the clan did stir an ache in her, though, and suddenly it felt as if it had been ages since she had last seen her friend rather than the matter of a few weeks. 

The servants seemed to see the shift in her mood and doubled their efforts, complimenting her skin and hair and alluding lightly to the successes Chūsei had already had in securing servants willing to participate in the selection of the appointments. Kagome thanked them, but could not entirely draw herself back from the nagging worry of what might be happening to her friends outside the court at that very moment.

At last when they deemed her clean enough, they allowed her to exit the bath and escorted her to her chambers to finish getting her ready for bed. One of the women began the process of combing through and drying her hair while another brought food for the evening meal.

Kagome thanked her profusely, realizing at the sight of the food exactly how hungry she was. She invited the women to join her in eating and after a bit of wheedling managed to get them to accept, the three of them conversing until darkness had settled in fully. It reminded her very much of times she had spent with Sango doing much the same, the feeling at once comforting and somewhat lonely.

When it was dark enough that lanterns would need to be lit for them to continue, the women begged off, asserting that Kagome needed to rest. She echoed the sentiment back to them, thanking them both once more for indulging her before settling in to her futon. 

She lay there for what seemed a long stretch of time, tired but unable to drift off. The wind whispered just outside of her window and she shifted to a more comfortable position, hoping the sound might lull her.

“Psssst, Kagome!”

Her eyes popped open. So, not the wind, then.

She sat up, her gaze going to the single high window of her chambers. The light of the moon edged a familiar silhouette there, illuminating just enough of his silver hair and inhuman ears to leave her certain.

“Inuyasha? What are you-?”

“C’mere!” he hissed, sticking a hand through the rounded opening and reaching it out to her.

“You realize this is getting ridiculous, right?” she sighed even as she rose to go to him.

“Just hurry up!” he said, beckoning impatiently. “I’ve got something you need to see!”

“Is everything alright?” she said, a flicker of worry curling through her. 

“It’s fine,” he said, grasping her hand as she stretched it up to reach his. “Hold on. I’ll pull you up.”

He tugged her up until he could grasp her shoulders, helping her to slip through. He caught her by the waist on the other side, their feet still hanging above the ground of the garden as he used one hand to hold them suspended. As soon as she was through he allowed them to fall, his legs taking both of their weight easily as he landed.

He shifted her weight, looping his free arm under her knees to carry her more easily. Instinctively she wrapped both arms around his neck to stabilize herself, and she noticed he had switched out his usual haori in favor of just his suikan. Likely it was hanging out somewhere to dry after the soaking it had taken that afternoon.

Inuyasha’s nose twitched and she heard a faint sniffing. He wrinkled his nose, frowning. 

“You smell...clean,” he said as if the word somehow offended him.

“That is the point of a bath,” she returned archly,  
clinging more tightly as he crouched before springing to bring them up and over the outer wall of the Chūgū’s residence.

He grumbled something that she decided she was better off not hearing. One of his forelocks tickled her nose as his momentum blew it across her face and she reached out to grasp it, tugging lightly. 

“Where are we going?” she asked. A faint grin flickered at the edge of his mouth.

“Just wait and see,” he said with barely concealed excitement.

A few more bounds brought them to the roof of a building just off of the walkway that led the rest of the way to his chambers. He ran along the roof, skirting the walkway and his chambers. 

Behind his chambers was a large garden that Kagome had never seen before. Winding stone pathways, bridges arching artfully over ponds, and lush greenery seemed to stretch on for a small eternity before her. Kagome drew in a breath, dazzled at the sight it made cloaked in shadow and caressed by the soft light of the stars. 

“It’s beautiful, Inuyasha,” she breathed, her eyes widening. 

The hanyou’s grin widened, fangs glinting in the starlight as they peaked over his lower lip. 

“Just wait,” he said, eyes bright as they sought out his destination.

After several more moments a large tree, comparable almost in size to the Goshinboku, came into view. It occupied the furthest corner of the vast garden, its expansive branches casting the area into deep shadow. Inuyasha leapt, alighting nimbly on one of the thicker branches. 

Setting her down carefully, he squatted beside her and pointed downward into the darkness near the base of the tree.

“You see it?”

Kagome squinted, leaning forward to peer down at the spot he had indicated. He placed a hand on her shoulder, steadying her. It took a few moments for her eyes to adjust, but a vague shape soon emerged.

“Is that...a building?” she said.

She felt more than saw him nod, his hair brushing lightly over her shoulder.

“Servant’s quarters,” he said, as much pride in his voice as if he had constructed the building himself. “Or at least it was. It was abandoned awhile back when they built a larger one and then everyone forgot about it when this tree got so big that it hid it.”

“How did you know it was here?” Kagome asked, turning her head enough to see him.

Some of the excitement drained from his expression. He lifted his shoulders in a small shrug.

“After my mother left, every now and then some asshole relative would get the bright idea to try and move the bastard son of the Tennō into the Dairi,” he said lowly, his gaze sliding away from hers. “Usually to try and catch my old man’s attention or something. Never worked, and I’d usually just end up hiding out here until I could get out again.”

“Oh,” Kagome said softly. 

She reached out, placing a gentle hand on the side of his face. The glow of the moon reflected in his eyes as they flicked back to hers, the gold there made almost liquid by the light. She met his gaze steadily, hoping he could see there the feeling she was not quite sure how to put to words.

The corner of his lips quirked up and she was sure that somehow he did. 

“It’s alright,” he said.

“It’s not,” she replied. “But thank you for sharing it with me. What made you think of this place all of the sudden?”

His former grin resurfaced, a hint of pride in the way his chin tilted up. 

“You wanted a solution,” he said. “Well, I found you one.”

He gestured to the barely visible building, eyeing her as if expecting a sudden outpouring of praise. She looked from it to him, confusion furrowing her brow.

“Solution?” she echoed, the word faintly apologetic. 

He deflated instantly, even his ears drooping. A scowl surfaced to cover the disappointment and he sat back on the branch with a huff. 

“‘You realize this is getting ridiculous, right?’” he said in taunting falsetto, pressing a hand to his face histrionically. “‘If we carry on like this we'll be found out, Inuyasha!’ That! This is the solution to all that!”

She blinked, feeling her mouth drop open slightly.

“Was that supposed to be me?” she said. “I do not sound like that!”

“You’re missing the point!” Inuyasha snapped. “This is it! This can be our place!”

She frowned, choosing to let slide for the moment the unflattering imitation. She could find another time to get revenge for that slight. 

“But we would still both have to sneak out of our residences every night,” she pointed out. “And sneak back in each morning. We’re bound to be noticed by the guards or the servants, coming and going at odd times like that.”

Inuyasha shook his head. 

“Not with this place,” he said. “There’s a door in the back of my chamber that leads out into these gardens. The guards would never even know I was gone. And you see the wall around the garden? There’s this tiny opening there that leads into the garden of a residence on the other side. I think the servants used to use that, too, but it would be easy for you to go out into the garden and come through.”

“But I would have to sneak all the way from my residence and into that person’s garden,” Kagome said. “If anything, that would be worse.”

Inuyasha shook his head.

“The place is empty,” he said. “Used to be for foreign emissaries, but now…well, you know. I’ll have you moved in there. Problem solved.”

“You don’t think people will find it strange?” Kagome pressed. “Having me moved like that again?”

Inuyasha shrugged.

“What for?” he said. “They already know you’re my closest advisor. Is it that strange that I’d move you closer to make things easy?”

Kagome’s eyes widened slightly. A flicker of pleasure curled through at the easy admission on his part. She leaned toward him, a shy grin playing about her lips.

“Closest advisor?”

Inuyasha flushed faintly, glowering at her. 

“Yeah, yeah,” he huffed. “Don’t let it go to your head, wench.”

Kagome’s smile widened, but she decided to let him off without further comment. Her gaze slid back down to the shadowy outline of the building below them, scarcely larger than the huts of her village, as she considered what he had laid out. 

She had to concede that he seemed to have put a good deal of thought into the matter. The new arrangement would allow them to move more freely without drawing the notice of their guards or the servants and would prevent him from having to dismiss his guards entirely to hide her movements. 

She could not help but think that there would still be raised brows and fluttering fans at her being moved into even closer proximity to the Tennō, but most people did now seem to acknowledge her position relative to his, so perhaps not so many as there might once have been. 

It was not the ideal situation, not by far. But it would give them a place, a way to maintain this fragile footing they had found with one another. And she realized suddenly that for that she was more than willing to bear all the rest. 

Kagome nodded to herself.

“Alright,” she said, turning her gaze to meet his. “This place is ours, then.”

The unguarded joy that lit his features then was worth anything. An answering smile stretched inexorably across her face, a small laugh bubbling over.

He leaned forward, catching the sound with his lips against hers. She smiled into the kiss, her arms twining about his neck as she leaned into it. 

They had a place.

* * *

They spent their first night in the place that night at Inuyasha’s insistence. She was grateful to find that he had had at least enough time to smuggle a futon into the place, though, he admitted slightly shamefacedly, not much time to do anything else to prepare it. 

Consequently a film of dust still covered most of the three small rooms that made up the entirety of the place, cobwebs glittering here and there throughout the room like ghosts. 

Tucked against the warmth of Inuyasha’s body, Kagome could not much bring herself to care.

The sensation of being gathered up and lifted half-roused her at some point. Blinking blearily at the face above hers, she realized that it was Inuyasha and he seemed to be taking her somewhere. 

The placid grey light of pre-dawn filled the sky outside as he stepped out of the ramshackle building, and it occurred to her that he must be taking her back to the Chūgū’s residence. 

He glanced down at her as she began to stir in his arms, a faint frown creasing his brow. He murmured something about her going back to sleep, shifting her to rest more comfortably in his arms. 

She nodded, already feeling herself beginning to slip back down into sleep’s warm embrace as his carefully even pace lulled her. Her eyes slid shut and in a few moments she was gone. 

The next thing Kagome was aware of was a strange sudden chill, the sensation akin almost to having been enveloped in freezing water. She gasped, coming abruptly to full wakefulness in the hanyou’s embrace.

Her gaze darted rapidly about, taking in her surroundings and absorbing the fact that she and Inuyasha were no longer moving. After a moment she realized that they were in the garden just outside of her chambers, but there was no sign of whatever it was that had disturbed her.

She had turned to ask Inuyasha if he had felt it, as well, when a gale kicked up around her strong enough that she was nearly lifted out of his arms. The feel of it was like ice pelting her skin, so bitingly cold that she yelped.

The whooshing of the wind in her ears was so loud that it drowned out all else. After a moment, though, the sound seemed to resolve itself into something else. Into words carried like whispers along the breeze.

_We need to talk. Come find me. You know where._

And then the wind was gone, simply ceasing as if it had never been. 

Inuyasha clutched her to himself, eyes darting about the garden in search of an enemy. Failing to find one, his gaze slid to her. 

“What in the seven hells was that?” he said. 

Kagome blinked, frowning. She brought a hand to her ear, the skin there still chilled. 

“I think I am being summoned,” she said. “Kagura-sama wants to speak to me.”

Inuyasha’s eyes went wide, brows jumping almost to his hairline. His lips drew back in the beginnings of a snarl.

“The Taira woman? The shit just now was her?”

Kagome nodded, shifting enough that he was forced to put her down. She eyed the sky, the grey of it lightening rapidly as dawn approached. 

“I should hurry and go while it is still dark out,” she said. “I imagine she called me now to avoid being seen as much as possible.”

Inuyasha reached out, grabbing her arm..

“You can’t be fucking serious,” he snapped. “You told me yourself that that woman works for Naraku! And what, she sends you a little windstorm and you go running to check on her?”

Kagome frowned, attempting to pry her arm from his grasp with little success. 

“She told me herself that she works for Naraku, remember?” she snapped. “And she wouldn’t risk herself by calling for me if it was not something important. I have met with her before and it was fine. Just let me-”

“Let you what?” the hanyou snarled. “Let you run headfirst into a trap? Naraku could be pulling her strings, forcing her to lure you in!”

Kagome paused, the truth of the words nettling her. It could very well be a trap. Perhaps Naraku has learned of their previous meeting somehow and was now forcing Kagura’s hand.

She frowned, biting her lower lip. There was also the chance that Kagura genuinely was in trouble  
and needed her help. If that was the case then she could not simply leave her to whatever cruelty Naraku might inflict on her.

She eyed Inuyasha. His jaw was set stubbornly, every line of his face telling her he had no intention of budging on this. Kagome knew she would never be able to get past him. Perhaps, though, she did not have to.

“Then come with me,” she said. “If it is a trap, she will only be expecting me, right? It will be much harder for her to do anything if you’re there. And if it’s not a trap...well, I doubt she’ll be thrilled about you being there, but we can figure that out.”

His eyes narrowed as he considered this, his scowl easing into a frown. He nodded. 

“Fine,” he said. “But if there’s even a hint of something about to go wrong, I’m pulling you out of there, got it?”

Kagome nodded, eager to get going before they lost fully the cover of darkness. She moved around him, pressing at one of his shoulders until he bent low enough for her to situate herself on his back. 

“Let’s go,” she said, gripping his shoulders.

He lowered himself obediently into a crouch, body tensing beneath her as he prepared to spring. Mid-launch he stumbled, tottering forward a few awkward steps.

“Uh...where exactly are we going?” he said.

“Oh…”

She frowned, realizing that Kagura had not actually said where she was to be found. The youkai woman seemed to think that she would know where it was, though. If it concerned the two of them, that really left only one place. 

“I think I know. We’re going to Naraku’s place.”

Break

“The place reeks,” Inuyasha said lowly, grimacing as the stink of it hit him. The scent was a hard one to place, but it was something like hatred and decay. Like a battlefield. Like the passing of a man not ready to die. 

Kagome slipped down from his back, moving towards the small opening in the low wall. As convoluted as her memory was of how she had gotten here the first time, it had been no small feat to find it again. Thankfully between what she could recall and Inuyasha’s ability to cover ground quickly it had not taken them too long. 

“It used to be Naraku’s place,” Kagome said by way of reply. “Back when he lived here in the court. At least that’s what Kagura-sama said the last time that we were here.”

His scowl deepened, his ears going back against his head. 

“Then why in the seven hells would she want to meet here?” he said. 

“Perhaps because he despises the place,” came a voice from just beyond the wall. “Perhaps because he cannot bear the thought of his past weakness, and so he abandons it. Or perhaps I simply enjoy reliving my past torments over and over again. Who knows?”

Emerging from behind the wall, Kagura crossed her arms over her chest as she considered them both through narrowed eyes. She slipped her closed fan out from the depths of one of her trailing crimson sleeves, bringing it up to tap almost threateningly just beneath her pursed lips. 

“You brought your pet dog to sick on me,” she drawled, sliding the fan open. “How cute. Very well. If it is a fight you came for-”

Youki flared in Kagome’s spiritual sight, coiling around the fan in Kagura’s hand. Behind her she felt Inuyasha tense. She threw out an arm to hold him back. 

“We did not come here seeking a fight,” she said. “I swear it. Inuyasha-I mean, the Tennō-sama was merely wary of a trap and wanted to make sure I would be safe. Can you blame his Majesty after all that you have told me?”

Kagura seemed to consider this, her gaze sliding slowly between them. She quirked a dark brow, her eyes narrowing.

“He knows, then?” she said. 

Kagome nodded. 

“I have told his Majesty everything you told me of Naraku,” she said carefully. “His Majesty deserved to know. He was a victim in this, as well.”

She hoped that Kagura was sharp enough to pick up on the bit she was omitting. She had told Inuyasha nothing of Kagura’s involvement with his older brother, the circumstance which had led to their meeting in the first place.

Some of the sharp edge eased out of the youkai woman’s expression and Kagome was relieved to see she had indeed caught her meaning. After a moment her fan snapped shut.

“Very well,” she said. “I suppose it works in my favor, as this matter concerns the both of you to a degree. Just know that should you choose to attempt it, I will not be so easy to kill as you might hope.”

She turned, disappearing behind the wall in a faint whisper of silken layers. 

Inuyasha and Kagome looked to one another. He nodded, hand wrapping warily about the hilt of Tessaiga as he moved to follow Kagura. Kagome went after him, both stepping into the small plot of overgrown grass and weeds that culminated in the dilapidated shack near which Kagura waited.

She settled herself on the rotting wood of the porch with as much grace as if it were a throne, the layers of her juni-hito drifting and arranging themselves as if guided by some preternatural wind. 

“Allow me to start us off,” she said, her gaze measuring as it slid over each of them in turn. “Consider it a trade of sorts. I offer up a piece of information in the hope that you will reciprocate in turn.”

She paused, eyes narrowing as she cocked her head slightly to one side. She lifted her closed fan, using it to gesture between them. 

“This,” she said. “Naraku is aware of it. I do not think he yet is aware that the two of you are intimately involved, but he knows enough of your relationship to want to use it against you. Be on your guard.”

A smirk curled up the edges of Kagura’s lips as Inuyasha and Kagome both blanched. Kagome felt as if her stomach had dropped out from its proper place, a chill worse by far than Kagura’s earlier windstorm racing across her flesh. Inuyasha’s eyes had gone wide, his grip on the Tessaiga white-knuckled.

“How...how did you…?”

“Know?” Kagura finished for her. “Well, the part about the two of you already being intimately involved was more of a guess until right now. As to the to the two of you being in love-”

“We’re not!” Kagome snapped hurriedly, almost reflexively. “I mean, it isn’t...things are not like that between us.”

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Inuyasha’s gaze shift to her. She fought the urge to meet it, her hands clenching at her sides as she willed herself to be still. To not not feel it or betray herself. Still she could feel his gaze on her face for long moments, could see enough to watch his shoulders sink. She bit her lip. 

“Is that so?” Kagura drawled, her red gaze fixed closely on the hanyou’s face. “Well, whatever you wish to call it, Naraku has been aware of the closeness between you since your guard dog here abandoned everything to rush to your aid when Akago had you. He has asked me to keep an eye on you, though he has made no mention as of yet of what he intends to do. I can only advise that you be on your guard.”

“And what of you?” Kagome said, forcing her gaze up to meet the other woman’s. “What of what you know? How do we know you will not try to use it against us?”

Shrugging lightly, Kagura spread her hands open before her. 

“Short of locking me away, you have no way of knowing that I won’t,” she said. “All I can give you is my word that I have no plans to use it or to share it with Naraku. It would go entirely against my own interests to do so, after all, and even you can understand that self-interest is a great motivator.”

“And how exactly does it go against your interests?” Inuyasha broke in. “Before today the only thing I’ve ever seen you try to do is stir shit up. How’s this any different?” 

Kagome glanced at him, the genuine anger in his voice catching her off guard. Fangs bared, his eyes bored into the woman. Kagura returned his look, her brows arching.

“Such language,” she said, pressing a hand to her chest with feigned indignation. “And you had been doing so well as of late, too. Well, as I am certain your lover has already informed you, much of what I have done has been at Naraku’s behest. If I wanted to continue living, I had to do as he said.”

“Then what‘s changed?” he challenged. “Because from where I’m standing it looks like a lot of the same bullshit.”

Kagura’s look sobered. Her gaze fell to her fan where she twisted it idly between pale, slender fingers.

“You,” she said after a moment. “The both of you are what has changed. I was free once, more free than anyone. For a long time I thought I could never be free again, and so I resigned myself to doing the bidding of a man I despised above all others.”

“But in the both of you I finally see a way out, a chance to be free once more. You have the potential, you’ve gathered enough strength to stand a chance of opposing him. And you are a fool if you think I will not grasp at any chance with both hands. I will either be free or I will die trying for it. There is nothing else for me now.”

“Then you’re using us,” Inuyasha said, though some of the edge had gone out of his expression.

“I am,” she said without flinching. “But we share an enemy, one that any of us on our own stands little chance of defeating. You want to protect your lands? Your precious miko? Well, I have things that I want to protect, as well. And keep in mind, were it not for me, neither or you would have any idea of what it is that circles you like a carrion crow.”

Inuyasha’s scowl deepened. Kagome reached out, placing a gentle hand on his forearm. He glanced at it, unable to lift his eyes to her face.

“Kagura-sama is right,” she said softly. “She was under no obligation to tell me anything. And if we can all band together to beat Naraku, isn’t it worth at least hearing her out?”

His jaw clenched, mistrust written clearly in the deepening lines around his mouth. At last he huffed out a breath, shaking his head.

“Fine,” he bit out. “Let’s hear it. What is it that you want from us?”

“It is simple enough for the time being,” Kagura replied. “The time for the appointments is drawing near, correct? When it does come, I need you to select myself, Kanna, and Byakuya from among the Taira. Well, in truth I could do without Byakuya, but to leave him out would be to raise Naraku’s suspicions. I need him to believe that Byakuya is keeping an eye on me.”

Kagome frowned, considering this.

“What advantage is it to you that you and Kanna-sama be selected?” she said warily. “If anything, would not Naraku benefit from having you so close to us?”

“Precisely,” Kagura said, her fan sliding open with a snap. “Naraku will see himself gaining the advantage. He will think that you have allowed spies into your midst who will report back to him.” 

“But I will be free of the prying eyes of my clan-or most of them, at least. Enough that I can feed him misinformation without him noticing. Moreover, I will be close enough to warn you of whatever he might reveal to me without drawing suspicion down on myself.”

“And what about the other two?” Inuyasha asked.

“Kanna I have plans for,” Kagura said. “Though it is difficult to know with her if she will heed them.  
At the very least she will not actively go against me. Byakuya...well, he will be an inconvenience, but as I said he is necessary to Naraku believing that I remain obedient. I should be able to work around him. So, what do you say?”

Kagome and Inuyasha looked to one another, each trying to gauge the other's thoughts. Kagura sighed.

“You do not have to decide right now,” she said. “Talk it over amongst yourselves if you must. Only consider this: if I am lying, what real harm have you done yourselves? You place me in closer proximity and you know to keep your eyes on me. But if I am telling the truth, you stand to gain a great deal from the alliance.”

Kagome glanced from Kagura back to Inuyasha, hesitating. It was difficult to find fault with Kagura’s argument, but looming behind it was the ever-present specter that was Naraku’s control of the woman.

Kagome could believe the woman was in earnest in all of this-or as much in earnest as someone could be who had only known coercion and manipulation for so long a time-wbut what if Naraku was to find her out? In an instant she could again be made into a tool to hurt herself, or worse, Inuyasha. 

But could they afford to turn down a chance to gain an advantage over Naraku?

And could she live with herself if she looked into the face of someone who was so clearly struggling for her life and turned away? Could she live knowing that she could have done something and fear had stilled her hand?

“I think we should do it,” Kagome said softly. 

Inuyasha’s ears twitched, his eyes widening as he met her look. His eyes searched hers as if trying to follow the line of her thoughts. 

“She’s a victim in all of this, too,” she said. “Can we truly just abandon her to whatever Naraku might do if we have a chance to do otherwise?” 

The line of his mouth tightened for an instant, his hands flexing at his sides. Quickly it eased, though, his eyes darkening with something like resignation. 

“Fine,” he said. “But we don’t turn our backs on her ever, understand?”

Kagome nodded, offering him a small smile of gratitude.

“Then it is settled,” said Kagura, drawing their attention back to her. “Until Naraku can be destroyed, we are allies. Beyond that…”

Kagura trailed off, but the words she had not spoken hung heavy between the three of them. Beyond that there was only uncertainty because there was no way of knowing if there was a beyond for any or all of them.

Still, for better or worse, they were allies. 

* * *

Shortly after the agreement was reached the three decided it was best to part ways. The sun was climbing rapidly into the sky and none of them wished to risk discovery. Thus the meeting dissolved with promises that they would be in communication should anything change before the time came to announce the appointments.

Hardly a word passed between Inuyasha and Kagome as he carried them back to the Dairi, each struggling to sort through the tangle of their thoughts. To Kagome it seemed she had barely blinked before he was setting her down in the garden just outside of her chambers. 

He explained that he had a Council meeting and several other matters that he had to deal with, so he would likely not see her for the rest of the day. Lifting her up and through the window back into her chambers, he ordered her to try and get some rest before departing.

Though Kagome would have liked nothing more in that moment than to comply, she found that she was unable to. The buzzing of her thoughts was simply too loud.

After a few abortive attempts to sort herself  
out, she decided a trip to the Chūwain might be best. A little quiet and meditation would do her well. 

She dressed herself and set out, letting the servants know as she went that she would not be needing breakfast. They chided her lightly for skipping meals again, but thankfully allowed her to go off without too much fuss beyond that. She greeted her guard where they waited outside of her residence and the three of them were off.

The sky outside had grown dark and still with the promise of rain. Kagome was grateful for it, not only because the cool air helped to soothe her but also because the threat of rain kept many of the courtiers indoors. She was able to make it to the steps of the Chūwain without encountering another soul.

Halfway up the stairs, though, she heard one of her guards mutter a curse, stumbling a step. She reached out, assuring herself that the guard was uninjured before turning to look for the source of the slip. 

A little girl, no older perhaps than eight if Kagome were to hazard a guess, sat rubbing her shoulder on the step below them. What was visible of her face through the matted tangle of her dark hair was deeply begrimed, dirt clinging to her like a second skin. Her robes were of the rough material of a servant, the color hard to distinguish beneath the layers of dust that covered them. 

She turned her gaze up, wide brown eyes blinking owlishly up at Kagome. At the sight of the three of them she bolted up, quickly enough for the curtain of her hair to lift and reveal a mottled bruise on the ridge of one of her cheeks.

She dipped in a series of apologetic bows to them before racing ahead up the steps. Kagome called out after her, concerned at the rough look of her, but the little girl either ignored or did not hear her. Within the span of several moments she had disappeared up over the top of the stairs.

At the top Kagome looked for her again, but she was nowhere to be found. After she and her guards had completed the purification ritual, she stopped a passing disciple of the temple to ask if he might have seen her.

The man said he had not seen her that day, but that there had been several sightings matching Kagome’s description spread out over the last few weeks among the disciples. No one was quite certain what the little girl was doing there as it was rare to catch more than a glimpse of her before she skittered off. Nor was she among the servants who were in dedicated service to the Chūwain, making her frequent presence there all the more strange.

Kagome thanked him for the information, puzzling it over to herself. She tried searching the grounds for a bit longer in the hopes she might cross paths with the little girl again, but her efforts were in vain. At length she resolved to ask Midoriko if she might keep an eye out for her.

After taking up her usual spot in Amaterasu’s pagoda, she settled in to meditate for a time. The atmosphere of the place helped to soothe her as it always did, allowing her to refocus herself after the strangeness of the morning.

Even after Kagura had told her of Naraku, she had never expected that the woman would go so far as to actively seek to destroy him. For someone in Kagura’s position it was an exceedingly dangerous game to play, one that might very well end in the loss of her life.   
  
Still, she was willing to play it. She was willing to risk everything to regain her freedom. Kagome could not help but think that it was partly to do with the inu-youkai being held only several buildings away from her. 

Whatever her reasons, Kagome felt with a kind of bone-deep certainty that their best chance of finding and defeating Naraku lay in them banding together. She was still uncomfortable with the knowledge that Kagura knew more of her and Inuyasha’s relationship than she would wish, but she had seen enough to know that Kagura had a kind of honor all her own. Kagome knew that so long as she kept the secret of Kagura’s feelings, her own sense of honor would compel Kagura to do the same. 

Naraku, on the other hand...she shuddered to think that he might suspect something of the relationship between Inuyasha and herself. He had already proven himself adept at manipulating the feelings of those around him-Kagura’s, Inuyasha’s father’s, even her own when he had targeted her village-but that she might be used against Inuyasha...the thought left her cold.

She and Inuyasha would need to be on their guard now more than ever to keep from being discovered. Thankfully Kagura at least would not be feeding him that information any longer. 

With the tangle of her thoughts set in order, Kagome thanked Amaterasu and ended her meditations for the day. Finding that she had a good deal of daylight left, she decided to join Midoriko out in the court. The disciple from earlier had informed her that she was out visiting the Michinaga residence where a few people had fallen ill, and Kagome thought she might be able to lend a hand there. 

Gathering her guard, she set out. 

* * *

Kagome spent the remainder of the day assisting Midoriko with a number of healings and blessings throughout the court. The work was satisfying for a number of reasons, not the least of which was being able to help people in much the same way she once had in her village. 

It also allowed her to ease some of the burden on Midoriko, though the elder miko insisted she should concern herself more with her own health than hers. Kagome dismissed this out of hand, the simple work hardly tiring her in the least. 

It also allowed her to interact with the courtiers in a different manner than she was accustomed to, one that was far less formal. It allowed her to see their lives outside of the court meetings and social events, to see them as people who loved and worried for those around them as much as the people of her village did. It was a welcome sight.

Late in the day the rain that had been threatening at last began to fall. Kagome and Midoriko were forced to part ways, Kagome promising to come out to assist her again soon and Midoriko promising that she would be on the lookout for the little girl Kagome had encountered near the Chūwain.

Upon returning to the Chūgū’s residence, Kagome found the place in a flurry of activity. One of the servants informed her that they had received orders to have her moved to a residence closer to the Tennō’s. 

Kagome was slightly surprised at how quickly Inuyasha had set the move in motion, some part of her having thought it would take at least a few days. Still, she could not help the pleased flutter that darted through her.

She followed some of the servants moving things out of the Chūgū’s residence to the new one, grabbing a parasol to help shield them from the rain as they navigated the paths of the Dairi. She attempted to convince them to hold off until the rain had passed, but they would hear none of it and instead tried to persuade her to retire to the residence. Kagome was their equal in stubbornness, though, and followed them back and forth until they at last decided to stop for the night.

Kagome was relieved when they did, her clothes soaked despite the parasol. A couple of the female servants were quick to strip her clothes from her, insisting on preparing tea and a hot bath to warm her. Kagome submitted to their attentions, requesting that food be brought, as well, as her stomach reminded her in no uncertain terms that she had yet to eat anything.

After the meal and the bath she went to her new chambers, eager to explore a bit. The room was slightly smaller than her previous one, but if anything the more compact space suited her. Too much space often made her feel uneasy, as if she were sleeping out in the open. 

The new room also had the advantage of multiple shoji, allowing her more freedom of movement. One of the shoji in particular opened out onto a small walkway leading into a well ordered garden, something Kagome was particularly pleased to find.

She realized also that it must be the garden that Inuyasha had mentioned the previous night. Kagome crept out into it, sliding the shoji closed carefully behind her to avoid making any noise. 

The rain had ceased by that point, leaving the paths beneath her feet damp and thick with mud. She hitched her sleeping yukata as high up as she could to avoid dirtying it, fumbling about as well as she could in the dark.

At last she made it to the low wall that surrounded the garden, reaching out to slide a hand along the cool stone of it in search of an opening. It did not take long for her to discover it, an overgrown bush concealing the small opening.

Kagome wriggled through it, elated to find on the other side of it the place from the night before. Their place.

As her eyes adjusted she could make out a shadowy figure sitting cross-legged on the porch. She hurried forward to meet him, a smile lighting her features. 

“Inuyasha!” she said, careful to keep her voice quiet just in case. “It worked!”

The hanyou shifted where he sat, half-rising to meet her before he stopped. He crossed his arms over his chest, his expression shuttered.

“Took you awhile,” he said, “I thought you might not come.”

Kagome paused, frowning.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

Inuyasha’s gaze slid away from hers. He seemed to hesitate, his ears swiveling back to pin against his head. 

“What you said to that Taira woman…” he muttered, almost too lowly for her to hear. 

He trailed off, eyes darting about as if in search of the rest of the words. Kagome watched him, a sinking feeling growing in her stomach. At length he groaned, shaking his head.

“Forget it,” he snapped, spinning on his heel. “Let’s just go to bed already.”

He pushed past the moth-eaten entryway hanging of the small hut, leaving it swinging in his wake. Kagome blinked, her frown deepening as she moved to follow him.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” she asked as she pushed past the hanging, pausing to slide off her muddied slippers near the entryway. “Did something happen with the Council?”

Inuyasha glanced at her from where he had thrown himself down atop the futon, sprawling there on his side with one hand supporting his head. She half-noticed that he had finished cleaning out the place, all hints of dust swept clean and a few new items scattered throughout. It had a certain coziness to it.

“I just thought…” he said, drawing her full attention back to him. “I thought that...we-”

He cut himself off, his eyes searching her face. After a moment he looked away. 

“...Yeah,” he said quietly. “It was the Council. Bunch of bastards.”

Kagome moved to kneel beside him on the futon. She wanted to reach out to him, but something kept her hands planted firmly in her lap.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” she asked softly.

“Yeah,” he said. “I want to. But I won’t. Not yet.”

He reached out, tugging her down to rest beside him before Kagome could make much sense of the cryptic statement. He tucked her head beneath his chin, his body curling protectively about her own. 

A part of Kagome wanted to press him on this, to demand some sort of an explanation. Another part of her quailed at the thought of walking down that path, one that could lead to anything or nothing at all. 

And so she lay silent within the cage of her own indecision until at last the steady pulse of his heart beneath her ear dragged her under. 

* * *

Kagome awoke the next morning to find herself back in her new chambers, tucked snugly into her futon. The warmth of the rising sun slid gently across her face as she lay there for long moments, trying to muddle through how she had gotten there.

She could only conclude that Inuyasha must have moved her at some point early in the morning, so carefully that she had not even stirred. Truly this new arrangement was far superior to all of their previous fumblings around. She smiled to herself, the thought that they might really be able to maintain this delicate balance warming her.

“O-Miko-sama?” came a voice from behind the shoji that led into the inner hallways of the residence. 

Kagome blinked, forcing herself to sit up. From what she could tell from the light against the shoji, she had slept in a bit later than she was accustomed to. Likely this was her call to begin her day. 

“Please enter,” she called, running a perfunctory hand over her sleep-mussed hair to settle it.

The figure behind the shoji bowed before sliding it open. She stepped into the room before lowering herself to bow once more.

“My apologies for waking you, O-Miko-sama,” she said. “But there is a messenger here for you from the Chūwain. He insisted that you would want to be made aware as soon as possible.”

“Be made aware of what?” Kagome asked. “Is something the matter?”

The servant woman hesitated, shaking her head after a moment. 

“Nothing like that, I think,” she said. “Or at least nothing that he said. Only...his message is a little odd.”

“Odd how?” Kagome said, frowning.

“Well...it seems that you are being summoned,” the woman said hesitantly. “...By Sesshoumaru-sama.”

Kagome blinked, her eyes growing wide. Slowly a grin stretched across her face.

It was finally time. 


	33. Of Sun Marks and Spring

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today's (partial) mini-history lesson:
> 
> -Kakei: I think I might have defined this one in a previous chapter, but those little bamboo/wood spouts found commonly in Japanese gardens. They fill with water and then tip to empty out into a pond/stream and for some reason I find the sound they make intensely soothing.
> 
> -Kitsuji ōji: One of the avenue names within the Heian-kyō. Suzaku ōji was the main one leading from the Dairi outward, but each avenue had its own name and they were all laid out pretty much on a grid pattern from what I’ve been able to see from the maps I’ve found.
> 
> -Yamatogoto: a six- or seven-stringed zither which, unlike the koto and other stringed instruments, is believed to be truly native to Japan, and not imported from mainland Asia.
> 
> -Goryeo: a Korean kingdom founded in 918 that unified and ruled the Korean Peninsula until 1392. So basically during the time period of this story, Korea was not yet called Korea but rather Goryeo (which had emerged victorious out of three divided kingdoms, but that’s a story for another time). Goryeo was Japan’s closest neighbor and served as the corridor through which much of Chinese culture/goods came to Japan. Historically they had good relations with Japan during the Heian period, trading goods and sending emissaries between the two courts. Obviously I did not stick to this same concept.
> 
> There are several more notes at the end to avoid spoilers, so look there if you see any other confusing terms!

* * *

“His name is Menōmaru.”

Kagome paused where she stood, her hand hovering just over the shoji. She blinked, turning her gaze to the outline of the youkai silhouetted against the brilliant blue of a dawning spring morning.

Sesshoumaru’s back was to her where he stood across the room, a faint breeze tugging at the length of his pristine white sleeves and silver hair. He had opened the outer shoji of the room that looked out onto one of the sprawling gardens of this wing of the Chūwain that currently served as his prison. The hollow clacking of a kakei as it dipped to empty water into a small pond was the only sound to be heard for long moments.

Sesshoumaru turned his head fractionally from the view, eyeing her over his shoulder with faint distaste.

“Have you nothing to say, human?” he said, one silver brow arching faintly. “Surely you have no more desire than this Sesshoumaru to draw this out longer than need be.”

Kagome slid the shoji closed behind her, taking a step into the room. She raised a brow of her own in challenge.

“Well, I cannot say I have any particular desire to exchange pleasantries of any kind, Sesshoumaru-sama,” she returned levelly. “Especially considering that the majority of our encounters have ended in threats to my life and you have yet to even acknowledge that I have a name beyond ‘human woman’. However, I had hoped you might elaborate a bit as the name Menōmaru means very little to me.”

A faint thinning of his lips betrayed his annoyance with her before he turned his face away once more. Kagome took a few more steps into the room, more than prepared to wait. He had finally summoned her. She had no intention of leaving until she knew everything that he did.

“The battles between my father, the great Inu no Taisho, and the King of Goryeo, Hyōgo, are legendary among the court,” he said after a beat of silence. “Although this Sesshoumaru should have expected no less than to have to explain the whole matter in its entirety to a common born human.”

Kagome bit her lip against a sigh that wanted desperately to escape. She was familiar enough with the inu-youkai’s lofty demeanor to know that she was unlikely to escape this encounter unscathed. It was merely a question of whether the injuries were to be to her pride or her body. 

She forced herself to move to his side, tilting her head back to look him in the face. Standing at more than a head shorter than him, she knew she cut a distinctly unimposing figure, but it was the best she could do to show him that she was not to be put off. Still Sesshoumaru did not so much as glance at her, his gaze distant as he observed the gentle morning breeze rippling across the surface of the pond. The hollow clacking of the kakei sounded once more. Kagome drew a deep breath.

“Please, Sesshoumaru-sama,” she forced out with great patience. “I am well aware that I am not as well versed as yourself and those of the court in matters concerning the former Tennō-sama, may His soul inhabit peaceful places. But what do those battles or this Menōmaru person have to do with the symbol on the flag? That is what you called me here to discuss, is it not?”

Sesshoumaru turned a baleful look on her. Were he another man, Kagome thought he might have sighed. 

“My father defeated King Hyōgo,” he resumed as if she had not spoken, and Kagome bit her lip to keep herself from snapping. “In doing so he reclaimed Tsushima and several other islands from Hyōgo’s grip. Hyōgo had wished to prove the superiority of his kingdom’s might in infringing on my father’s lands, to expand his own lands and to force my father’s hand in trade. Hyōgo gravely underestimated my father, and in the end it cost him both his honor and his life. This Sesshoumarua believes that his son, Menōmaru, seeks revenge for his father’s losses and has at last found a means to have it in the bumbling of the half-breed and the man you claim to have orchestrated my father’s murder.”

Kagome’s eyes widened, her annoyance dissipating an instant. 

“Goryeo,” she said, the word heavy as it left her. “The symbol belongs to the kingdom of Goryeo, then?”

She knew little of the kingdom beyond a few brief lessons that Kaede had given her in her youth. Their closest neighbor and once a great partner in trade, only a few week’s journey by sea. And apparently desperate enough for revenge for past slights that Naraku was able to manipulate the King.

“The symbol you showed this Sesshoumaru is not that of Goryeo,” Sesshoumaru said, sparing her a faintly withering glance. “Menōmaru is neither brave nor foolish enough to openly have moved against this Sesshoumaru’s father or to declare a war even now. The symbol of Goryeo is the phoenix, one anyone within the court might have recognized should they have seen it. The symbol you brought to this Sesshoumaru was that of the imugi.”

“Imugi?” Kagome echoed, frowning. 

“A giant serpent youkai,” Sesshoumaru said. “A being of waves and storms. One that must survive one thousand years to become a ryū. A symbol flown by the wakō, pirates long funded by Hyōgo to terrorize the waters between our lands when he did not wish to dirty his own hands. Apparently Menōmaru has decided to take up his father’s legacy in funding them, as well. The wakō are untrained and loyal to none, but their ships are fast and they will do anything so long as the reward is large enough.”

Kagome felt her stomach knot. Pirates being paid by Goryeo’s king. A kingdom’s leader hiding behind bands of criminals to organize the murder of one Tennō and attacks against another. And Naraku behind it all, manipulating it to his own ends. 

Still, at least now she knew. Their enemies were not formless shadows or forces. They were flesh and blood, things that could be known and understood. Things that she and Inuyasha could find ways to defend against.

She forced her gaze back to Sesshoumaru’s.

“Have you any idea how large the wakō fleet is, Sesshoumaru-sama?”

He lifted one silver brow, considering her for a moment. 

“Likely not large,” he said. “Though the size will be of little consequence. They will be merely the first wave. Quick attacks designed to gauge defenses and create cracks which the larger fleet can exploit. It is Menōmaru’s way of ensuring that he will suffer no losses should the situation prove other than what he believes it to be.”

“You seem to understand a great deal, Sesshoumaru-sama,” Kagome said, impressed despite herself.

The corners of his lips curled downwards, his chin lifting imperiously. 

“This Sesshoumaru was present at my father’s side in all of his battles,” he said. “Though he was led astray at the end of his life, my father had no equal on the battlefield. He was a Tennō worthy of his throne.”

Unlike Inuyasha. Kagome scowled, hearing the implication clearly enough. 

“It was your father, Sesshoumaru-sama, who chose your brother to succeed him,” she said, unable to help herself. “As strong as you are, as capable as you might be, you must understand by now why the former Tennō-sama chose as he did. Your brother strives to protect people, to protect your father’s people. Have you ever wanted to protect anything even once in your life?”

She felt the flare of his youki like a lash across her spiritual sense as he turned to face her fully for the first time since she had entered the room. She forced herself not to flinch, forced herself not to back away even as she watched a faint red bleed into the whites of his eyes and the magenta markings on his face turn to jagged slashes of violent color.

“If a thing cannot protect itself, then it is meant to perish,” he said, elongated canines flashing out at her.

Kagome met his gaze, her fists clenching at her sides. 

“Your father did not believe that,” she said softly. “And if you truly do, Sesshoumaru-sama, then I pity you. If you believe that is what strength is, then you understand nothing. And what of Kagura-sama? She is struggling, doing everything in her power to free herself and return to you! And if she cannot, would you simply condemn her to death? Would you say that she was destined to die?”

“Speak her name again, human, and you will learn quickly enough what I know of strength,” he hissed.

The threatening cracking of the knuckles of his rapidly elongating clawed fingers resounded in the silence between them, punctuated by the hollow clacking of the kakei.

“You could help her!” Kagome snapped, nails biting into the flesh of her palms as she fought down the instinctive urge to summon up her spiritual power. “You could help us all! But you’re too selfish, too fixated on this legacy of your father’s that doesn’t even truly exist! Do you really think that this is what he wanted for his sons?”

His face elongated grotesquely before her, his mouth stretching into a slash of red that seemed to split his features in two. The red had consumed his eyes fully now, even his irises seeming to dissolve within it. In a movement that Kagome could not follow with her eyes, his hand was before her, the sickly green glow of his poison a mere hand’s breadth from her face. Amazingly, though, he held himself there.

A small tremble passed through Kagome’s limbs. She gazed up at him with wide eyes, watching the hesitation there.

“The legacy my father left to me,” he said at last, his voice no more than a low rumble in his throat. “Is no more than a sword that will not cut and a throne withheld from me that by all rights should have been mine. An empty legacy. So, human, enlighten this Sesshoumaru: what is it that my father desired?”

There was the same condescension there that was ever-present in his manner, the same derision, but something in the way that his inhuman crimson eyes searched hers spoke of something else. For the first time, Kagome realized that perhaps Sesshoumaru was lost.

Some of the edge went out of her glare.

“You know as well as I do, Sesshoumaru-sama, that I do not have that answer,” she said. “Perhaps...perhaps your father needed you and Inuyasha-sama to figure it out for yourselves. Perhaps that was the only way you could see it. Or maybe it’s something that you have to make for yourself, something you have to decide all on your own.”

He eyed her for a long moment before his lips curled downward in distaste, the red draining slowly from his eyes. His gaze slid away from her, his features slowly receding back into a semblance of humanity. 

“What do you know of anything?” he murmured, almost more to himself than to her. “Go. You have the knowledge you sought and your presence grows more tedious with every moment.”

Kagome frowned, but the words did not nettle her as they had before. His features were a mask once more, pristine and unreadable, but for the first time his eyes reminded her of Inuyasha. She sighed.

“Fine,” she said. “I will take my leave if you feel that we are done here, Sesshoumaru-sama.”

He said nothing, his gaze fixed on some point beyond her sight. The dismissal was clear enough.

Kagome turned to leave, but could not help pausing as she reached the shoji. She glanced back, catching sight of his retreating figure as he moved to stand out in the sunlight of the garden. A cloud passed overhead, the shadow of it sliding over his still form.

The breeze kicked up once more, tangling in the length of his silver hair and billowing through the folds of his robes. She watched as he lifted his face to meet it, watched as it drove the clouds onward until he stood half illuminated and half in shadow.

The kakei echoed forlornly once more.

Kagome slid the shoji closed behind her.

* * *

“Your brother is exhausting.”

Inuyasha jumped, pressing a hand to his chest. The entryway hanging that he had just pushed aside swung back into his face and he spluttered, swatting it away.

Kagome blinked up at him from her place curled up on the futon, surprised at having been able to startle him. He glared at her.

“Kami, woman,” he snapped. “How did you beat me here? And why in the seven hells are you sitting in the dark like that?”

Kagome frowned, shrugging as she uncurled her arms from around her knees.

“I wanted somewhere quiet to think, so I thought I could do it while waiting here for you,” she said. “I guess I got so caught up in my thoughts that I forgot to light the lantern.”

After her less than satisfactory meeting with Sesshoumaru she had spent the majority of the rest of the day tangled in her own thoughts, though she had at least managed to accomplish a few more things around the court despite her preoccupation. She had left his wing of the Chūwain and sought out Midoriko, joining the elder miko in her rounds of purifications and healings throughout the court. At one point as they had departed the Chūwain Kagome could have sworn she saw the little girl from the previous day, still ragged and filthy looking, darting around a corner, but no sooner had she processed the thought than whoever it was was out of sight. She had attempted to follow to no avail and Midoriko said she had yet to encounter the girl, either.

After she and Midoriko had finished their work, they had parted ways and Kagome had returned to the Dairi. Part of her had wished to ask Midoriko for her counsel on what Sesshoumaru had revealed to her, but she had quickly decided against it. As much as she trusted Midoriko, Kagome was loath to reveal anything about the ships to anyone beyond Inuyasha. Unfortunately he had told her the night before that he was to be stuck in Council meetings until late and thus she was left to her own devices.

She had headed to the Dairi after separating from Midoriko to check on the progress being made in preparing housing for the appointments. She was pleased to find that the servants were making quick work of readying the Kōkyū and Daijō-kan for habitation. She joined them in their work for a time, helping to move the necessary items and clean where she could. The protests of the servants were perfunctory, accustomed as they had grown to her presence among them and her insistence on involving herself.

Kagome was grateful for the distraction that the work provided, though her thoughts rushed up and over her like a wave as soon as the sun began to set and she headed back towards her new residence. She had declined dinner, claiming exhaustion after a long day and begging off to go rest. She had quickly slipped through the wall to her and Inuyasha’s place, eager to be alone with her thoughts and to wait for him to share what she knew.

“Wait,” Inuyasha said, brows furrowing as he moved towards her. “My brother?”

He squatted down at her side, eyeing her suspiciously. Kagome nodded, her gaze sliding away from his.

“He summoned me to come speak with him today,” she said, deciding it was best to get it out as quickly as possible. 

She could practically feel his hackles rise and from the corner of her eye she saw the gleam of his fangs as he opened his mouth to start in with her. Her hand darted out, her eyes locking with his as she pressed it over his mouth. Inuyasha’s eyes widened, brows jumping up until they were obscured almost entirely by his fringe.

“Just listen for a moment before you tell me off, alright?” she said hurriedly. “He didn’t hurt me. And if he had truly wanted to I am more than capable of defending myself, as you well know. I had asked him about the symbol on the flag that the ningyō gave me and he knew what it was.”

Inuyasha glared at her from over her hand, eyes narrowing. She yelped as she felt the slickness of his tongue dart out against her palm, snatching her hand away.

“And when exactly did you go to that bastard for help?” he snapped.

Kagome returned his glare with one of her own, scrubbing her hand against her hakama.

“Several days ago,” she replied. “He was one of the only people who I thought might know what the symbol was. And, as I said, he did.”

Inuyasha’s frown deepened. He reached out, pressing a clawed hand to her cheek. Kagome blinked, faintly surprised at the gesture when she had fully expected a fight. 

“He didn’t do anything to you?” he said lowly, his eyes roving her face in search of injuries.

Kagome shook her head.

“No,” she said. “Though I annoyed him fairly thoroughly.”

“Keh,” Inuyasha scoffed, a faint upward quirk to one corner of his lips as his eyes met hers. “Good. Bastard deserves it.”

He lowered his hand, satisfied that she was unharmed. He shifted to sit cross-legged at her side, the few faint beams of moonlight that were all that illuminated the place highlighting the silver of his hair for a brief instant. The sight stirred a memory of earlier that day, of nearly identical silver strands stirred by the wind.

Kagome reached out, running her fingers idly through the strands nearest his face. Inuyasha blinked, a flush suffusing his face.

“W-what?” he said. “Did you wanna b-brush it again or…?”

“You really do look alike,” Kagome said. “You and Sesshoumaru-sama.”

  
Inuyasha’s face dropped. His left brow twitched faintly, his lips curling downward in distaste.

“That’s what you were thinking about?”

“I just…” Kagome said, twining the strands about her fingers as she silently admired the fineness of them. “I know that you’ve told me the two of you never got along, and I can’t say I don’t understand why. Sesshoumaru-sama is cold and arrogant and...well, he tried to kill you, so that certainly didn’t engender any brotherly feelings. Still, I can’t help but feel that two of you are...similar somehow.”

Inuyasha recoiled, his hair slipping from her fingers. 

“Similar?” he said, spitting the word out as if it were a foul taste on his tongue. “Me? With that uptight asshole?”

Kagome sighed, pressing a hand to her head. Perhaps this was not a conversation that he was ready to have.

“Not like that,” she said, shaking her head. “In many ways, you couldn’t be more different. It’s just...when I spoke to him today, I thought that he seemed a bit like you did when I first met you. Like he’s searching for something. Like he’s...a bit lost, maybe.”

Inuyasha quirked one dark brow, his eyes narrowing incredulously.

Kagome sighed once more. No, this was definitely not a conversation that he was ready to have.

“Nevermind,” she said, waving a dismissive hand. “It’s not important. What is important is what he was able to tell me about the symbol. He said that the symbol is that of an imugi and that it belongs to the wakō.”

The disgust vanished from his expression, incredulity coming fully to the fore.

“Why would the ningyō go out of their way to warn you about wakō?” he said. “Far as I know, those bastards are always out there. They go after anyone with anything worth stealing.”

Kagome shook her head.

“No, it’s not the wakō we need to worry about,” she said. “Well, I mean, it is and it isn’t. It’s the person who is controlling the wakō, the person who is paying them to target us specifically. Sesshoumaru-sama says that it’s the son of one of your father’s old enemies, a person named Menōmaru. The current King of Goryeo.”

Inuyasha’s eyes widened, catching the moonlight in such a way that they almost seemed liquid. His mouth fell open slightly.

“Goryeo?” he echoed. “You mean it’s that bastard’s son?”

“You know about King Hyōga?”

“He’s half the reason I never saw my old man,” he snapped. “I lost count of the number of times my old man went off to fight him, and he was doing it even before I was born. The asshole just kept trying and trying. He never stopped until my old man ended up killing him. And now you’re his saying kid is trying it?”

“It would make sense, wouldn’t it?” she said. “Your father embarrassed and defeated his father. The entire court would have known about it, and we know Naraku is clever at manipulating others. If he went to Menōmaru, perhaps he convinced him that he could help him kill your father to get his revenge and then promised him that if he would help him he could finally have what his father had sought after for so long.”

“Then why the wakō?” Inuyasha said, leaning towards her. “They’re not loyal to anything but what they can get out of it, and there can’t be that many of them. Why not send his own ships?”

“Because he’s hiding,” Kagome said, leaning in in turn. “He’s afraid to fail openly like his father did, so he’s hired the wakō to do his dirty work. He wants to send them ahead to break through our defenses, and if they succeed then he will press the attack with his own ships. If they fail then he can abandon them, pretend as if he was never involved.”

“That fucking coward,” Inuyasha growled.

“At least we know now,” Kagome said softly. “That’s something.”

He blinked, his expression softening somewhat. He reached out, laying his hand atop hers where it rested on the cool wood of the floor between them.

“Yeah, it’s definitely something,” he said. “Thanks to you, Kagome.”

Kagome flushed at the unexpected praise, her gaze falling to the sight of his clawed hand enveloping her own much smaller one.

“Thanks to Sesshoumaru-sama, really,” she murmured.

Inuyasha’s face fell.

“I ain’t thanking that bastard.”

“Somehow I do not think he would want that, either,” Kagome replied drily. “But more importantly, what do we do about it?”

He frowned, considering this.

“Their ships will be fast,” he said. “Made for quick attacks. It’s hard to know how they’ll attack or what they’ll target.”

Kagome frowned. That was about as far as she had been able to get, as well.

Inuyasha’s hand tightened around her own. She glanced up, meeting his gaze.

“Oi, I said I would handle it, right?” he said. 

She nodded.

“Then...have a bit more confidence in me, alright?” he murmured.

Kagome blinked, considering this. She leaned forward the last little bit, resting her forehead against his. His eyes widened, a flush creeping up his neck to suffuse his face. She smiled.

“Alright,” she said softly. “You’re right. I trust you.”

He was silent for a stretch, his eyes searching hers. His lips worked soundlessly, forming words he could not give voice to. She wondered idly what they might have been, distracted by the warmth of his breath on her face and the faint ache it inspired in her.

Abruptly she leaned forward, pressing her lips to his. She felt a brief moment of hesitation before he returned the kiss, his fervor matching and then quickly overtaking her own.

She wrapped her arms about his shoulders as he pressed her back against the futon, the heated tangle of lips and limbs drowning out any more thoughts of ships that night.

* * *

Nearly a week passed in a relatively uneventful manner after Kagome’s meeting with Sesshoumaru. She spent most of it doing as she had been to maintain the delicate balance she and Inuyasha appeared to have achieved within the court. She spent a great deal of time with Midoriko, either continuing in the training of her spiritual powers or about the court doing the work of a court spiritualist. Midoriko especially thought it beneficial that she be seen as much as possible about the court, that she come to know and be known by the courtiers as much as she could. Seeing her, Midoriko insisted, seeing firsthand her abilities and her strength and her genuine desire to be of service, was essential.

Kagome was not so certain about how essential it was in regards to herself, but she was glad enough to apply the advice where Inuyasha was concerned. They resumed their strolls about the court as often as they could manage, tending to any concerns or questions that arose. 

Inuyasha, for his part, had grown greatly in his ability to converse with the courtiers. Minor barbs were largely ignored-though she found that this was often just him allowing his irritation to simmer beneath the surface until he could vent it to her in the privacy of their room at night-and he was even thoughtful in many of his responses. At times Kagome found herself simply watching him, silently awed at the figure he cut. If there had ever been any doubt that he was of the bloodline of the Tennō, there was none in those moments.

It did make her feel lonely, though. When he looked like that, it was difficult to forget the distance between them. It was difficult to forget that one day the distance between them would be so great that she might only ever be able to see him like this.

But every night without fail she would find him in their place, the place where only the two of them existed, and he would make her forget that distance. And for as long as she was able, Kagome was content to forget.

At the end of the week she finally received the summons that she had been hoping for. A servant found her on one of her walks about the court with Inuyasha, informing her quietly that Chūsei was requesting her presence at her residence when she was finished. She glanced at Inuyasha, certain that he had been able to hear her. He nodded, tilting his chin in the direction of the Dairi.

Kagome thanked the servant and they were quickly on their way. They had nearly finished a full circuit down the busier avenues of the Heian-kyō already and the walk back to the Dairi was a short one. As soon as they were safely within the walls, Inuyasha hastily shucked off the kanmuri that he had opted to wear that day. His hair fell in a tangle down his back, his ears twitching as they were freed of their confinement. He heaved a sigh of relief.

“Finally,” he said. “Fucking thing pinches my ears.”

“Then why wear it?” Kagome said, stretching her arms up over her head in the hopes of easing some of the tension in her shoulders.

The walks about court, however successful, always left her feeling a bit exhausted. Though it felt as if recently exhaustion had become a silent, faithful companion of hers, embracing her at times when she least expected it. Absently the thought of the Shikon surfaced, but she pushed it back down quickly.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Inuyasha’s gaze on her, his eyes surreptitiously skimming the line of her body as it curved in the stretch. She exaggerated the movement just a bit further and felt a rush of pleased warmth as his eyes widened faintly, his face coloring as his gaze darted away.

“‘Cuz it looks better this way, right?” he murmured. “You said that, remember?”

Kagome nodded, silently flattered that he had taken the words to heart. 

“True,” she said softly. “You do look quite impressive in all of it.”

Out of the corner of her eye she saw his flush deepen. She smiled to herself.

“Keh,” he scoffed. “What about you?”

Kagome blinked, turning towards him.

“What about me?” she said, glancing down at her robes.

They were perfectly clean, not a fold out of place. She had even allowed the servants to spend an inordinate amount of time brushing out and arranging her hair that morning.

Inuyasha scowled.

“I had all those juni-hito sent to your place!” he snapped. “You haven’t worn one of them!”

Kagome groaned, shaking her head.

“We’ve been over this!” she said. “I’m a spiritualist! I dress as a spiritualist so that they will see me as a spiritualist.”

Inuyasha paused and Kagome stopped beside him. The light spring breeze that had been sweeping the avenues of the court all morning kicked up once more, pushing a lock of hair across her eyes. She pushed it back, blinking as the wayward breeze died out.

His face when she caught sight of it again was oddly intent, golden eyes fixed on her face. 

“What if they saw you as more?” he said.

Kagome swallowed, feeling a prickle of trepidation creep up the length of the back of her neck. She frowned, shaking her head.

“I am what I am, Inuyasha,” she said softly. “What else would you have them see me as?”

He did not answer for long moments, though his mouth opened and closed several times as if he would have. His fists clenched at his side and he shook his head, turning on his heel and starting forward once more.

“If you don’t know, then forget it,” he said brusquely. 

Kagome scurried after him, wondering at the sudden shift in his manner. Perhaps the kanmuri really had been pinching his ears too tightly.

They walked in silence for a stretch, Kagome darting glances at the hanyou that he would not meet. As they passed the orange and sakura trees that framed the steps to the Shishinden she noted absently that the sakura tree looked just on the verge of flowering. It wouldn’t be too long before they were in full bloom.

They passed through the Shinshinden and around the outer walls of the Jijūden before arriving at her residence where they were ushered inside by a waiting servant. He seemed faintly surprised to see Inuyasha accompanying her and Kagome realized that Chūsei had not explicitly asked for the both of them. Mentally she shrugged this off as they were led to one of the smaller tea rooms of the residence. There was little Chūsei could have to say to her that she could not say before the Tennō.

The servant bowed before the shoji, sliding it open for them to enter. Kagome thanked him as they passed into the room, the man sliding the shoji closed behind them.

In the middle of the room Chūsei knelt atop a cushion, a steaming ceramic mug on the dark wood of the low table before her. Her eyes widened as they entered the room. She rose hastily, her hands sweeping over the simple green fabric of her yukata and the dark coils of her coroneted hair, neatly arranged and shot through here and there with threads of silver. She smiled, extending her hands to them.

“Well, well,” she said, pressing Kagome’s hands between her own. “I didn’t expect the pleasure of seeing the both of you together, though I am glad of it. I would offer to have more tea prepared, but I know your Majesty isn’t partial to it. Sit, though, and I’ll fetch us another cushion and something to eat, perhaps?”

Inuyasha nodded and she smiled, patting his arm once before hurrying from the room. Kagome glanced at him, faintly surprised at the easy familiarity between the two of them. She knew that Chūsei had been reporting to him during her absence from the court, but Inuyasha was surly with those he did not know well on his best days. 

Inuyasha dropped the kanmuri he still carried unceremoniously on the dark wood of the table, gesturing with his chin for Kagome to take the one cushion that was available opposite Chūsei. Kagome frowned.

“I shouldn’t sit before you,” she said. “It would look-”

“Keh,” Inuyasha interrupted. “Chūsei’s smart enough not to worry about that kind of shit. Sit.”

Kagome’s frown deepened. She turned to him, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Please tell me you do not use that kind of language around Chūsei-san,” she said.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes, crossing his arms in turn.

“I’m on my best behavior, sensei,” he snarked. “So sit. And make sure you eat when the food gets here.”

“I ate plenty this morning,” she protested, kneeling down on the cushion. “I’m not a child.”

Inuyasha pinned her with a look, eyes narrowing.

“Plenty, huh?” he said. “You mean a measly bowl of miso? I could hear your stomach all morning.”

His ears twitched meaningfully atop his head. Kagome opened her mouth to protest, then closed it. She pressed a hand to her stomach. How had he known it was miso? 

“The two of you seem to get on well,” she commented. “You and Chūsei-san.”

Inuyasha shrugged, his gaze shifting to the cushion that the older woman had vacated.

“Keh,” he said. “Like I said, she doesn’t care about unnecessary shit. Besides, you trust her, so-”

The soft slide of the shoji interrupted whatever else he might have said and they both turned as Chūsei reentered the room, bowing before sliding the shoji closed once more. She moved to the table, setting the cushion she had fetched down at the head of it.

“My apologies for the wait,” she said. “The food should be here shortly. Please have a seat, your Majesty.”

Inuyasha nodded, moving to the cushion and nudging it with his foot until it was beside Kagome’s. He flopped down gracelessly onto it.

“Thanks,” he murmured.

Chūsei blinked, her eyes sliding between the two of them for a moment before she resumed her own seat. Kagome nudged the hanyou with her foot beneath the table, silently urging him to give her a little more of the space that propriety dictated in present company. He shot her a questioning look, but made no move to distance himself.

“Thank you both for coming so quickly,” Chūsei said, drawing their attention. “I hope I didn’t pull you away from anything important.”

Kagome offered her a smile, shaking her head.

“Not at all,” she said. “The Tennō-sama and I were simply making the rounds around the court, and we were nearly finished anyway. Besides, I’ve been eager to speak with you, but I did not wish to interrupt until you had had the time you needed.”

“Thank you for that,” Chūsei said, bowing her head. “The errand took me a bit more time than I thought it would, but it was delicate enough that I wanted to ensure I did not misstep in it.”

Kagome nodded, but a voice from the other side of the shoji forestalled her from answering. Chūsei rose and went to it, sliding the shoji open to accept a tray of food. She thanked the woman there who bowed before sliding it closed once more.

Chūsei knelt beside the table, carefully setting down the tray heaped with dishes and beginning to place them before them on the table. Kagome made a move to assist her, but Chūsei gently swatted her hands away. She offered her a small smile as she resumed her seat.

“Please, eat up,” she said, gesturing to the food. “I’ll be happy to tell you everything as you do.”

Inuyasha nodded, eagerly taking up his hashi and leaning in to inspect the food. He paused a moment before pushing several of the dishes closer to Kagome. She shot him a petulant look, missing entirely the thoughtful frown that lined Chūsei’s face as she watched them.

She allowed them several moments and mouthfuls before she began speaking again.

“As I said, it was delicate going and so it took longer than I had initially thought it would,” she said. “My apologies for it, but I didn’t want to risk alerting any of the courtiers to what I was doing should I approach the wrong servant.”

Kagome swallowed her mouthful of rice, shaking her head.

“Please don’t apologize,” she said. “I asked a great deal of you. I was well aware it would take time.”

“And I imagine his Majesty is aware of my errand?” she said, her gaze shifting to Inuyasha.

He glanced up at her, nodding. He swallowed an over-large mouthful and Kagome stifled a sigh.

“Kagome told me about it,” he said. 

Chūsei nodded.

“I thought as much,” she said. “Well, I am pleased to be able to tell you both, then, that the errand was a successful one, moreso even than I’d thought it could be.”

“They agreed, then?” Kagome said eagerly.

Chūsei’s smile widened. She nodded.

“Some more readily than others,” she said. “But with the assurance that they would be protected, they all agreed in time. There are at least three in each of the clan houses that have agreed. Well, with one exception, I’m afraid.”

“The Taira?” Kagome supplied.

Chūsei nodded, her gaze falling to the mug of tea she cradled in her hands.

Kagome glanced at Inuyasha. He met her look, nodding once, and she knew he understood her. That was an issue that had already resolved itself.

“My apologies,” Chūsei said softly. “I tried my best, but I couldn’t find a way into that snake’s den that wouldn’t raise their suspicions.”

“It’s alright,” Kagome said. “I knew when I made the request of you that that would likely be impossible. You can leave that matter to us. We’ll figure out some way of handling them in all this. Besides, you have nothing to apologize for, Chūsei-san! The work you’ve done with this is amazing, beyond anything I could have hoped for.”

Beside her, Inuyasha nodded, placing his hashi down atop one of the bowls.

“Kagome’s right,” he said. “You did good, Chūsei.”

She looked up at him, a smile blooming across her face before she dipped her head in deference.

“Thank you, your Majesty,” she said. “For the two of you, I was more than glad to do it. But I did not ask you here to be praised for my efforts, though I will confess to enjoying it. I wished to consult you as to how I mean to proceed from here. Now that they are in place, they will need a bit of time to observe, deliberate, and then to communicate back to me. I had thought to give them a week, if it suits you.”

Kagome glanced at Inuyasha. He met her look with a slight shrug.

“Doesn’t give us much time if we wanna have a ceremony to announce it,” he said.

“I suppose,” Kagome said. “But don’t you think we would do best not to delay it any further? Every time we go out the courtiers talk of almost nothing else, and the sooner we secure their ties to you the better, Tennō-sama.”

Inuyasha pulled a face at her use of the title, but did not comment. His gaze slid away from hers as he wrestled with the idea, his jaw set hard against it. 

“Fine,” he said at last, the word heavy with his reluctance. “A week.”

Chūsei eyed him, her brow furrowing.

“Are you sure, your Majesty?” she said. “I can delay it if need be.”

Inuyasha shook his head, his gaze fixed on the dark wood of the table.

“No,” he said. “Kagome’s right. We can’t avoid it, so let’s just get it over with.”

Chūsei’s eyes slid to Kagome’s, a question in her gaze. Kagome shook her head. There was little way for her to explain to the woman Inuyasha’s reticence without giving away a great deal too much. 

“Thank you again, Chūsei-san,” she said instead. “Truly. A week should be just what we need.”

* * *

“So how much do you know about planning court wide banquets?” Inuyasha said. “Because I haven’t got a fucking clue.”

Kagome glanced at him, the corners of her lips twitching downward. Shaking her head, she continued doggedly forward.

“That’s why we’re visiting Midoriko-sama,” she said. “She presides over ceremonies all the time with the court. Surely she will have some idea of how to put one together.”

Behind her Inuyasha scoffed. She turned a glare on him which he returned with a sharp look of his own.

“We’re going to her because neither of us knows shit about it,” he said. “It’s too bad that Tachibana woman is still-”

He cut himself off at sight of her expression, at the way it fell in an instant at the mention of the woman. He sped his steps, hovering just behind her. She did not meet his gaze.

“Kagome-”

“It’s fine,” she said hastily. “And you’re right. I wish Sango-chan were here. She knows all about this sort of thing.”

“...Do you miss her?” 

Kagome felt a strange lump in her throat at the words and the tentativeness with which they were spoken. She bit her lip against the wash of feeling.

“Yes,” she managed after a moment. “I miss them all. Sango-chan, Miroku-sama, Shippou-chan. I miss them terribly. But more than anything I wish that I could just see them, just know that wherever they are that they are alright. If I could just know that, then perhaps their absence would be a little easier to bear.”

“You found a way to see me when you were gone,” he said quietly. “Maybe we can find a way to see them.”

Kagome paused, glancing back at him. His hand was curled around the nenju, his expression earnest.

A faint smile touched her lips.

“Maybe,” she said softly. “I would like it very much if that were possible.”

He came to walk beside her and she felt his hand slip into hers. She smiled, her hand curling around his in turn.

“Then I’ll figure it out,” he murmured.

She squeezed his hand, glad of its warmth even as she doubted that he could. Still, it was difficult to feel lonely or worried for too long with him at her side. 

They reached the outer gates to the Dairi and paused. Kagome reluctantly pulled her hand from his, shooting him an apologetic glance. 

“We should hurry to the Chūwain,” she said. “Assuming Midoriko-sama does have an idea of how to put all of this together, we still only have a week. Last time Sango-chan had two weeks to do it and she was close to tearing her hair out the entire time.”

Inuyasha nodded, squatting down before her and offering up his back. Kagome eyed him.

“It’s still light out,” she said.”Someone might see us.”

Inuyasha shot her a withering look over his shoulder.

“They see us together all the time, Kagome,” he said.

“Not... _touching_ ,” Kagome said.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. 

“Wouldn’t want them to get the wrong idea,” he muttered. “Just get on. I’ll make sure no one sees us and we can walk back as far apart as you want, alright?”

Kagome opened her mouth to argue, but quickly closed it once more. There was no real point in arguing with him when he was like this and time was of the essence. As long as he was careful, it should be fine. She moved forward, carefully settling herself on his back.

He tucked his hands behind her knees, tugging her more closely against his back before he rose. Kagome gripped his shoulders, aware of the warmth of him even through the layers of his robes. She felt a flush begin to creep up her neck and shook her head to abate it.

“Follow the Kitsuji ōji,” she said, her face warming further when her voice squeaked faintly. “At this time of day it’s usually fairly quiet.”

Inuyasha nodded, though he shot her a questioning glance over his shoulder before leaping forward.

He kept to the rooftops, leaping lightly from one to the next with a grace and silence that was still impressive to her despite the number of times she had experienced it. She had been right about the Kitsuji ōji and they passed over only one small group of courtiers, moving so quickly that Kagome doubted the group saw them.

He also made quick work of the steps up to the Chūwain, taking them in bounds. He would have bypassed the purification ritual, as well, if she had not forced him to stop and observe it. He did so grudgingly before they moved into the main hall.

Midoriko was not to be found there, but one of the disciples that Kagome knew well told them that she was just down the hall in the records room. She offered to guide them there, but Kagome politely declined as she knew the way well enough. 

The records room was in a detached wing of the Chūwain farthest to the northern edge. It was a quiet place, meant primarily for study and transcription and used to store a great number of records from the court. Kagome was grateful to find the cluttered room largely empty save a miko nearly dozing over on open scroll in the corner. She cleared out fairly quickly at the sight of them.

They found Midoriko tucked behind several shelves, bent over several rolls of parchment that she was rapidly filling with a series of flowing kanji. At the sight of them she set aside her brush on the inkstone, rising and bowing low to Inuyasha.

“Tennō-sama, Kagome, to what do I owe the pleasure?” she said. “My apologies for my appearance. I had meant to hole myself away for the day with my work and had not anticipated visitors, let alone his Majesty.”

She held up her hands, her fingers and palms splotched all across with ink.

“The Nihon Shoki?” Kagome said. 

Midoriko smiled, nodding.

“I was actually working on detailing the lineage of the Tennō-sama for it,” she said, bowing her head to Inuyasha.

“My apologies for interrupting your work,” Kagome said. “And for coming unannounced like this. We had a matter come up that the Tennō-sama and I urgently require your counsel on.”

Midoriko’s brows lifted faintly, her gaze sliding from Kagome to Inuyasha and back again. Something entered her eyes, a keenness that sent a trickle of trepidation through Kagome. She recalled suddenly how much Midoriko knew of her true feelings towards Inuyasha and she fought back a wince, wondering if it had been wise of her to come here with him.

“No apologies necessary,” she said with a smile that did not put Kagome any more at ease. “I am always happy to provide any counsel that I can to you, Kagome, and of course I am ever your Majesty’s servant. Shall we move to the main hall? I can ask to have tea brought, or anything else you might require.”

Inuyasha shook his head.

“Here’s fine,” he said. “It’s better if it’s just the three of us around.”

Midoriko’s eyes widened faintly, but she nodded. She gestured to the other side of the cluttered table.

“Discretion it is, then,” she said. “Please, make yourselves as comfortable as you can in this mess that I have made.”

She waited until they had seated themselves before taking her own seat. Kagome glanced at Inuyasha, uncertain how exactly to begin. He tucked his hands into the depths of his sleeves, offering her no more than a slight shrug. Stifling a sigh, Kagome turned back to meet Midoriko’s curious look. 

“It is in regards to the appointments,” she said, deciding that it was best to waste as little time as possible. “We are very near to having made the selections and we were hoping you could advise us on how to proceed.”

Midoriko’s eyes widened, a smile turning up the corners of her lips.

“Then you were able to find a way to make your choices,” she said. “I am glad to hear it. I had mulled the matter over for a time after you came to me with it to little avail. Though I should have known that you were more than clever enough to work through it on your own.”

Kagome smiled, ducking her head at the praise. 

“Thank you,” she said. “Though I owe the answer that I found at least in part to you, Midoriko-sama. It was our discussion of the matter that inspired me to make the choice I did. I’ll confess it’s a bit of an...unorthodox method, but a good one nonetheless. That is part of the reason that we sought you out. The other part involves the announcement of the appointments. His Majesty and I, we...well, we…”

“We don’t know the first thing about planning anything,” Inuyasha finished for her.

Midoriko’s brows inched up at the blunt admission. Kagome fought to keep her gaze from him, well aware of the annoyance that would show there and unwilling that Midoriko should see anything out of the ordinary between them.

“What his Majesty means to say is that neither of us has much experience in putting together ceremonies here in the court,” she said stiffly. “So we had hoped that we might borrow yours, Midoriko-sama, or any advice you might have to offer.”

“I see,” said Midoriko, her head tilting thoughtfully. “Well, I suppose I do have some experience in planning ceremonies, though I’m afraid I’ve never planned anything too grand. Religious ceremonies for the most part. Still, if the Tennō-sama wishes it, I will do whatever I can. When do you intend that the ceremony should be held?”

Kagome hesitated, biting her lip. Midoriko arched one dark brow, her eyes narrowing.

“I will take that to mean that I do not have long,” she said.

“A week,” said Inuyasha. “Can you do it?”

“Can I do it? Yes. What it will look like is another question entirely,” Midoriko said, shaking her head.

“I’ll make sure you have anything you need,” Inuyasha said. “Or whoever you want to help you.”

“My thanks, Tennō-sama,” Midoriko said, bowing her head to him. “Though my concern is primarily for the both of you. I know how hard you have worked to bring us to where we are right now. I’ve no desire to tarnish it any way.”

“You won’t,” Kagome said hurriedly. “I trust you. We both do. And I swear I will do anything and everything I can to be of help to you. But time is of the essence in this matter. We need to move forward with the appointments if we hope to continue making progress here in the court.”

Midoriko nodded, though her gaze strayed to Inuyasha at this. He did not meet her look, his eyes shifting to the shelves behind her. Her brows knit together, and Kagome thought she saw a flash of some sort of understanding there.

“I understand,” she said. “And, as I have said, I am ever the Tennō-sama’s servant. I will not refuse if there is a way that I can be of help to the both of you.”

A smile stretched across Kagome’s face and she glanced at Inuyasha. He returned her look, nodding.

“Thank you, Midoriko-sama,” she said. “Truly.”

Midorko nodded, returning her smile though the slight furrow to her brow remained. 

“For the both of you, I am glad to do it,” she said. “Now, while I have you both here, we had best discuss any ideas you might have for the ceremony that you wish me to include.”

Kagome blinked, her gaze going to Inuyasha. He met it, shaking his head slightly. Kagome suppressed a sigh, turning back to the elder miko.

“Truthfully we haven’t got much in the way of ideas,” she admitted, shamefaced. “We have not had much time to think upon it. I’m sorry.”

Midoriko’s lips pressed into a thin line and Kagome could tell she was doing her best to contain a sigh. Her eyes fell to her own ink-stained hands and then to the heaps of parchment and scrolls scattered about her. She paused, her eyes fixing on one in particular. 

Her gaze trailed slowly from it up to Kagome. Or rather to Kagome’s shoulder. It lingered there for long moments, a look of dawning inspiration spreading gradually across the woman’s face.

“What if we were to frame the ceremony around Amaterasu-sama?” she said thoughtfully. “Spring is upon us, and in the past we used to always usher the season in with a celebration devoted to Amaterasu-sama and the return of her warmth to our lands. Besides which you, Kagome, can claim a rather...unique connection to her. One that we would not be amiss in emphasizing, I think.”

  
Absently Kagome’s hand strayed to her shoulder, resting over the sun scar. It felt slightly warmer than usual through the material and she blinked, a sudden thought occurring to her. She turned to Inuyasha, eyes widening.

“The appointments,” she said. “If Amaterasu-sama guided us to them…”

He nodded, his brow furrowing thoughtfully.

“That could work,” he said. 

Divine appointments. Kagome could have kicked herself for not thinking of it sooner. It would be the perfect cover for the servants, one that would be nearly impossible to question.

Glancing between the two of them, Midoriko laid her hands on the table before her.

“I will take that to mean that you both are amenable to the idea,” she said, smiling faintly. 

Kagome nodded, her smile widening.

“It’s brilliant, Midoriko-sama,” she said. “Absolutely perfect.”

Inuyasha nodded.

“It’s good,” he said.

Midoriko smiled, inclining her head at the praise.

“It will still need some fleshing out yet, but it is a base upon which we can build,” she said. “I will devote the rest of the day to filling in some of the details, if it pleases your Majesty. Kagome, I will expect you early tomorrow to make good on the promise of your assistance.”

“Do whatever you need to,” Inuyasha said, rising to stand at the obvious dismissal. “Like I said, anything you need can be made available.”

Kagome rose, as well, though her foot slipped on the cushion beneath her as she did. She stumbled, but Inuyasha’s hand shot out quickly to steady her. She murmured her thanks, flushing faintly as his hand slid away from her. 

Midoriko’s head tilted, her gaze thoughtful as it slid from one to the other. She rose.

“Another point in favor of Amaterasu-sama,” she said suddenly, her dark eyes fixing on Inuyasha. “Is her connection to the Tennō-sama. You, your Majesty, and your line are her descendants. It is through her mark upon you, Tennō-sama, that you were given the right to rule. It is something interesting to contemplate, is it not?”

A furrow appeared on Inuyasha’s brow as he eyed her, a frown edging his lips. His gaze slid from her to Kagome, his eyes widening suddenly. The barest hint of a smile curled up the corners of Midoriko’s lips as his gaze darted back to her.

“If you’ve time to spare, Tennō-sama, perhaps we can discuss the matter further,” she said. “It would aid my research greatly, and hopefully prove useful to you, as well.”

Inuyasha nodded slowly, his eyes fixed on her.

“Yeah,” he said. “Kagome, you go ahead of me.”

Watching the both of them, Kagome frowned. There was something going on there, something just out of her grasp.

“I can wait,” she said. “I don’t mind.”

Midoriko turned a smile on her, shaking her head.

“There is no need,” she said. “It will be a tedious matter, primarily for the sake of my records. Truly I am sorry to even keep his Majesty for it, but there’s no help for it. I am certain you have a great many other matters to attend to and I do not wish to keep you from them. I will see you tomorrow to begin our work, as early as you can manage here in the main hall.”

Kagome opened her mouth to protest, but closed it again after a moment.

Aside from a niggling sensation that she was being purposefully excluded from this discussion, there was nothing she needed to be concerned about. It was only natural that there would be some conversations that the O-Miko would need to have privately with the Tennō. Besides, if the matter was truly an important one then Inuyasha would surely share it with her.

“Of course,” she said at last. “I will see you on the morrow, Midoriko-sama. Tennō-sama.”

She bowed before turning to go. Reaching the entryway to the room, Kagome paused.

Glancing back, she saw that the pair was still standing. Inuyasha’s back was to her, but Midoriko’s face was still visible. There was a brightness to her eyes, something eager in her stance.

Kagome forced herself to turn away. If she needed to know, she would know. 

She exited, leaving the two to their devices.

* * *

“How did your talk go with Midoriko-sama?”

Kagome could have kicked herself. She had vowed that she would not ask, that she would allow him to tell her on his own when and if he wished to.

Still, none of that resolve had prevented her from opening her mouth the literal moment he stepped past the entryway hanging to their place. She bit her lip.

Inuyasha blinked, eyes widening as they met hers in the soft moon-glow of the small room. The entryway hanging swung down behind him, brushing against the backs of his nubakama.

“Huh?”

“Sorry,” Kagome said, shaking her head. “Come in. Sit down.”

She patted the space on the futon beside her. He moved to her side, eyeing her warily as he took the space offered.

“Sorry,” she said again. “I was just curious as to what the two of you discussed. I didn’t mean to accost you as soon as you stepped into the room. Was it...was it anything interesting?”

Inuyasha’s gaze slid away from hers, fixing on a dark corner of the room. Atop his head his ears twitched in several rapid motions, flattening out before swiveling up and about. 

“Keh,” he said. “It was nothing. Just...Tennō stuff, alright?”

Kagome frowned, leaning forward to try and get a better look at his face. He kept it turned determinedly away from her.

“Tennō stuff?” she echoed incredulously.

His ears twitched again. And again. Kagome’s frown deepened. 

“Just, y’know, normal stuff,” he mumbled. “About Amaterasu and…”

He trailed off. Kagome tilted her head, incredulity creeping quickly into suspicion. She tugged at his sleeve, but still he would not look at her. Kagome scowled. Reaching up, she grasped his forelock and gave it a firm tug.

“Ow! What in the seven hells, Kagome?”

He turned a glare on her. Kagome met it squarely.

“If it was nothing, then why are you acting so strangely?” she pressed.

Color crept into his face as he attempted to hold her look, his jaw set defiantly. 

“You said you trust me,” he said.

Kagome blinked, caught off guard.

“I...of course I do,” she said.

“Then trust me,” he said, leaning in to bump his forehead lightly against her own. “You’ll know when you need to.”

“...so it was something?”

Inuyasha groaned, flopping back against the futon and throwing an arm across his face.

“Kami, woman…”

“Sorry, sorry,” she said, sighing. “I understand. I trust you.”

He peeked out at her from beneath his arm as she settled in beside him, resting on her forearm. For several long moments there was silence between them, Kagome desperately trying to tamp down the myriad of additional questions that his words had stirred in her. He would tell her when he was ready. She could be patient. It was only natural that people should not share everything with one another all the time. After all, she-

A light tapping on her forehead drew her away from her thoughts. Inuyasha’s eyes met hers as he rolled over on his side to face her, giving her one last light rap between her eyes with his knuckle.

“Quit obsessing,” he said.

“I’m not.”

He scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“You are! Your eyebrows always do that thing when you’re obsessing.”

“What thing?”

“Like this,” he said, furrowing his brows in such an exaggerated manner that his entire face was pinched.

Kagome scowled, swatting at his arm.

“I do not look like that!”

“How do you know? You can’t see yourself!”

They glared at one another until at last Kagome sighed, relenting.

“Fine,” she said. “I was obsessing.”

“Knew it,” he said, smirking faintly. 

She sighed once more, her eyes sliding closed. She rolled over onto her back, smiling slightly to herself as she felt Inuyasha shift to lean over her. Her eyes slid open and she met his look, searching.

“How about a distraction, then?” she murmured.

He frowned, brows drawing together before lifting with sudden comprehension. His face reddened, the look in his eyes heating.

“Fine by me,” he said lowly, the words warm against her lips as he leaned in the last bit to claim them.

The instant warmth that flooded her was more than enough to drive any lingering thoughts from her mind. Kagome met the gentle pressure of his lips against hers eagerly, more than happy to lay aside her concerns for a time.

A shudder passed through her as she felt the light scrape of his fangs along her lower lip. She felt his lips curl upwards in a smile against her mouth. He had figured out that little trick somewhere in their fumblings and never failed to use it against her.

Well, two could play at that. She shifted, reaching up to tangle her hands in his hair until she reached his ears. Lightly she ran her blunted fingernails along the base of each ear, gratified at the deep groan that was torn from him at the motion.

Inuyasha tore his lips away from hers, pinning her with a glare that was somewhat undercut by the vast darkness of his pupils and his ragged breathing. Kagome smirked, tongue darting out to run over her kiss-swollen lips.

“Shut up,” he muttered, his lips descending on hers once more before she could protest that she had not said anything.

She continued her assault on his ears as their lips tangled, his tongue sweeping out to soothe the bite of his teeth against her lower lip. She shifted beneath him, hooking one of her legs around his hips and urging him closer. She gasped as his hips flexed against her, the hard length of him grinding against her core in a way that echoed along her every nerve.

He captured her lips again, repeating the motion relentlessly as his hand slid up the length of her side to rest on her breast. His thumb stroked over it through the light fabric of her sleeping yukata, every sweep a small spike of sensation against her hardening nipple. She writhed beneath him, hands sliding down to clutch at the neck of his han-juban.

Inuyasha’s lips left hers, sliding down to nip lightly at the juncture between her neck and shoulder as his hand moved to tug the neck of her yukata open enough for his hand to slip inside. Kagome’s hands slipped inside his han-juban in turn, her fingers skimming the warmth of his collarbone and chest as she worked the garment down past his shoulders.

“Sit up,” he murmured, breath hot against the flesh of her neck.

Kagome nodded a bit dazedly, shifting with him as he moved to sit up. Both were breathing a bit too hard as he fumbled with the tie of her yukata. For a moment she was worried he would simply shred the thing-too many pieces of clothing had been lost to those claws- but at last there was the whisper of fabric on fabric as the knot came undone. The material loosened about her, sliding down to bare her shoulders to his eyes.

Inuyasha paused, his gaze fixing on the darkened skin that made up the sun mark that dominated most of her left shoulder. His hand came up, fingertips trailing lightly over the flesh there. Kagome watched him, wondering at the riveted look to his gaze.

Slowly he leaned forward, pressing his lips to the mark. Warmth curled through her at the contact, though it was not the frenzied heat that usually accompanied these moments. It spread through her limbs and pricked at her eyes.

Inuyasha glanced up at her, his eyes bright as his lips lingered over her skin. Kagome swallowed, transfixed. Something in that look sent a shudder through her, a disorienting mix of longing and trepidation.

At last Inuyasha ducked his head, releasing her. Kagome nearly sighed in relief, the sound quickly morphing into a gasp as his tongue slid out to trace the edges of the mark. Before he had almost always avoided it, his look pained whenever his gaze did fall on it. Now, though-

Her thoughts were scattered to the four winds as he tugged at the loosened fabric of her yukata, the material easily surrendering its tenuous hold and slipping down to pool around her hips as his hand found her breast again. The flesh of his palm was rough against the soft skin there, his thumb tracing tight circles around her nipple. 

He ducked his head, his lips finding the neglected breast and working quickly to remedy that. Kagome’s hands buried themselves in his hair once more, clutching at him as the pull of his lips and hands threatened to drive her outside of her own mind. His fingers tugged gently at one nipple, his lips and teeth working eagerly around the other. She felt his free hand slide up over her thigh slowly beneath her yukata, crying out as it reached the slickness of her core.

He was cautious as he stroked between her thighs, ever wary of his claws. Still the slick glide of his fingers in tandem with his fevered attention to her breasts was almost enough to undo her, every bit of her coiling so tightly that Kagome was sure she would shatter.

“Inuyasha! Ah, please, Inuyasha-!”

He glanced up at her, doubling his efforts at the sight of her flushed skin and fever bright eyes. His fingers found the small nub between her folds and she mewled, her back arching desperately. Inuyasha groaned around her breast, his length throbbing at the sight as he stroked his fingers over it again and again.

There was nothing behind Kagome’s closed lids save a bright, blinding white as Inuyasha continued his ministrations, every stroke between her thighs or against her nipples heightening the sensation of it. The feeling of it was so strong that she almost wanted to beg him to stop, to pause, to let her breathe, but she could scarcely recall how to form words, let alone give voice to them.

Abruptly, though, she got her wish as his hands and lips stilled.

She panted, open-mouthed as she blinked down at him. His pupils were huge as he glanced up at her, so dark they seemed almost to consume the gold of his eyes.

“I need you,” he said. “Right now.”

She nodded, shifting hurriedly with him as he rearranged her until she rested in his lap. He reached down between them, struggling with the tie to his nubakama for a moment before he was able to undo it. Kagome assisted him in pushing it down his hips, reaching in to free his length from the confines of his fundoshi.

He groaned, his head falling forward as the warmth of her hand enveloped him. Kagome felt a thrill at the sight of him, running her hand slowly along his length. He was warm, almost too warm to the touch and she found that she was always surprised at the feel of him, a heady mix of hard and smooth.

Her thumb rolled over the swollen tip, circling the moisture weeping from it and spreading it across the rest of the head. His voice cracked around a cry of her name, his hips jerking up into her hand. She continued her unhurried strokes, drawing out the sensation as he had done for her. His face was pinched tight, even his ears pinned back as she sped her strokes.

Suddenly his hand shot out, catching and holding her wrist. His eyes were hooded as they met hers, his breath ragged. With his free hand he reached down, pressing it to her hip and urging her forward. She moved at his urging, her breath hitching as the tip of him prodded at the slickness of her entrance.

He held her there for a moment, leaning forward to capture her lips with his own as the anticipation stretched taut between them like an invisible thread.

At last it snapped as he pressed her hips down, shifting upward in the same motion to bury the head of himself inside of her. Kagome bit down on his lower lip, her hands scrabbling for purchase on his shoulders.

He eased himself into her until they were hip to hip, her weight balanced against his thighs and by the arm he had wrapped around her back. He released her lips, his head falling to rest against the slight swell of her breast. His tongue darted out to lave against her nipple and she cried out.

“Kami,” he muttered as he felt her tighten around him, her limbs trembling faintly.

Sucking her nipple into his mouth, he held her hips steady as he thrust up and into her. Kagome cried out again, her entire body shuddering around him this time. He was unrelenting, withdrawing and thrusting hastily back into her to the hilt.

He released her breast, his thrusts speeding as she continued to clamp down around him. He sucked in a breath at the sight of her, the arch of her back pale and smooth and highlighted in the moonlight as her breasts bounced slightly with every push of him inside of her. She panted, her eyes liquid as they met his, and he was certain there had never been anything better in the world.

Kagome leaned up to wrap herself around him as the sensation began to overwhelm her. Inuyasha ground his hips up and into her, panting as his movements grew more erratic.

“Kami, Kagome,” he growled, words rumbling across her collarbone. “You’re so...I just-”

“I’m close,” she whimpered. “Inuyasha, Inu-”

A sharp thrust stole her voice, the head of him pressing against something inside her that sparked across her nerves like wildfire. Her mouth fell open in a silent cry, her entire body tightening around him as she reached her release.

Inuyasha gave several more short, sharp thrusts, the tightness of her sheathe milking him for all he was worth as he reached his own climax. He shuddered, burying his face against her chest as the sensation nearly overwhelmed him.

Their panting breaths filled the small room as peace slowly descended on the pair. Inuyasha tilted his head back, peering up into her deeply flushed face.

“Was that...distracting enough?” he said.

“Huh?” she said ineloquently, unable to think past the pleasant hum of sensation filling her limbs.

A smirk tilted up one corner of his lips, a fang peeking out over his lower lip. Kagome frowned faintly, aware that she was being made fun of but unable to care much. She swatted lightly at his shoulder even as her lips turned up in a mirror of his own.

Inuyasha shook his head as his smirk widened into a smile. He shifted her carefully, lifting her until he could remove himself from her and set her down on the futon. Kagome groaned, both at the sensation and at the sudden realization of how badly cramped her legs had become while she was over him.

Inuyasha tugged the blankets of the futon out from under her as she rubbed the kinks out of her legs, draping it over her as soon as she was able to straighten her legs out. She laid back and he stretched out beside her on his side, eyeing her.

“You should sleep,” he said. “You’re up early tomorrow, right?”

She nodded, stifling a yawn with her hand. She could feel her limbs beginning to grow heavy with a pleasant mixture of satisfaction and exhaustion.

“You’ll wake me?” she said.

He nodded, reaching down to tug the blanket up over her still bare chest. His hand brushed the sun mark as he pulled it away, lingering over the skin there for several moments. 

Kagome murmured her thanks, her eyes slowly beginning to slide shut. Even as she drifted off she could feel the warmth of his gaze, fixed unerringly on Amaterasu’s mark.

* * *

Hard work had never bothered Kagome. From the time she was very young she had been accustomed to working hard, be it helping her father with the harvest or her mother with tending to Souta or Kaede with healings in the village. Hard work was simply a fact of existence in a village, something to be expected of anyone old enough to walk and talk.

After a week spent with Midoriko in organizing the ceremony, however, Kagome thought that perhaps she had never before understood what hard work truly was.

Every day of that week was spent from dawn until well past dusk at the woman’s side, nearly every moment of it occupied. If Kagome had ever thought that planning the return ceremony for the Tachibana with Sango had been difficult, it now seemed a dream by comparison.

Part of the struggle for her was that Midoriko, unlike Sango, insisted that Kagome be involved in every aspect of the planning and execution. It was essential that Kagome understand every bit of it should she ever need to plan one on her own, Midoriko insisted. While Kagome could reluctantly see the truth in this, there was something in Midoriko’s insistence on the matter that made her suspect that there was more to it than the elder miko was letting on. Still she did as she was bid, doing her best to commit as much of the process to memory as she could.

Beyond this, however, Kagome could recall little of the week. The only distinction that seemed to exist to mark the passing of the days was the brief darkness behind her closed eyelids that she would find temporary respite in each night. Her exhaustion was so deep that she even struggled to recall where she slept, whether she made it to her and Inuyasha’s place or simply collapsed in her own room. There were nights where she thought she felt his warmth beside her or his clawed hand stroking back her hair, but they might just as well have been dreams for all of the clarity that she could recall them with.

During the days Inuyasha did join her and Midoriko from time to time to check in on their progress. Invariably these were the only times that Midoriko allowed herself to be separated from Kagome, the pair moving off to discuss some matter or another. Had Kagome had even a modicum of energy to spare, she might have been curious enough at the continued secretiveness between the two to try and find out what it was that they were discussing. As it was she was simply grateful for the brief moments of rest that their talks allowed her.

At last, though, after what felt like both a small eternity and the barest blink of an eye, the day of the ceremony was upon them.

Kagome was roused that morning at first light, her unresisting form nearly dragged into the bathing chamber in the back of her residence. She began to be somewhat cognizant of her surroundings as she was guided into the waters of the bath, the warmth of them seeping slowly into her limbs and clearing some of the haze from her mind.

The serving women moved about her with impressive coordination and efficiency, scrubbing and oiling every bit of her down to the tips of her toes. They brushed and oiled her hair, as well, combing it until it shone like spun silk. As they worked they commented on how long her hair was growing and how pleased they were to finally see her beginning to put on weight-they were always concerned that she ate like a bird- keeping the conversation light as they knew how occupied her thoughts were with what was to come that day. 

Silently Kagome was grateful to them for their discretion. Her head felt full to almost bursting after the flurry of the last week, her thoughts circling endlessly around every detail of the ceremony to assure herself that nothing had been left undone.

She was distinctly less grateful upon being shown what she was to wear that day. 

Though it was one of the few details that she and Midoriko had not bothered to discuss, Kagome had felt fairly safe in her assumption that she would be allowed to wear the ceremonial robes of a spiritualist. A bit more formal than her usual garments, but still functional enough and more than befitting of her position and her role in the ceremony.

Laid out before her, though, was a juni-hito elaborate enough to rival any she had ever seen before. It was a brilliant wash of red and white silks, the colors so vivid that she almost wanted to shield her eyes against them. Embroidered all across it in some of the most delicate needlework she had ever seen were golden images of the sun, its rays bright and strong as they stretched the length of the fabric. It was beautiful and so utterly uncomfortable looking that Kagome could not suppress a sigh.

“It’s only ten layers, if that makes it any better,” said one of the women, Setsuko, sheepishly. “Not nearly so many as the winter ones.”

Kagome turned a pleading look on her.

“Tell me it wasn’t an order,” she said, unable to keep the petulance from her tone.

Setsuko shook her head, her lips twisting apologetically.

“From the Tennō-sama,” she said. “And the O-Miko-sama, for that matter. They insisted on us pulling it from the retired wardrobe of a former princess.”

Kagome bit her lip against another sigh, having expected nothing less. She nodded.

“Alright,” she said. “Best to get it over with, then.”

Setsuko bowed her head in agreement, offering her another contrite half-smile before gesturing to the other woman, Oshizu. Both moved forward, picking up the innermost layer and beginning the process.

They were fastidious in their attentions, every layer draped and arranged carefully to flatter her. When they had arranged the last layer Kagome was somewhat pleased to realize that Setsuko was right in the difference between ten and fifteen layers. While it could hardly be called comfortable, the juni-hito was at least not so heavy as previous ones that she had worn.

Unfortunately they were far from being finished with her.

With the juni-hito in place, the women set in with the necessary accessories. The first was a hand-fan, a lovely, delicate thing painted with the scene of Amaterasu emerging from the cave. Thankfully during her week with Midoriko the elder miko had made certain to re-familiarize her with fan language, picking up on and furthering the lessons that Kikyou had once given her. Kagome was grateful for it as the delicate accessory was looped about her wrist.

After the fan came a delicate golden sun circlet. Oshizu set it carefully atop her head, adjusting it until the sun symbol rested perfectly upon the center of her brow. From the symbol trailed delicate golden strands around the thicker metal of the band. The two women arranged her hair so that it concealed entirely the thicker band before artfully draping the chains over the dark strands of her hair. When they were done it appeared as if the sun symbol sat suspended, its rays catching the early morning light that filtered into the room so dazzlingly that Kagome was almost transfixed by the sight.

Still she was hesitant, eyeing her own reflection uneasily in the small hand mirror the women had provided to her.

“It’s lovely, truly,” she said, turning her face this way and that. “But...don’t you think it’s a bit much?”

In the mirror she saw Oshizu and Setsuko exchange a look, a faint smile curling up the lips of the latter.

“Perhaps for anyone else, Kagome-sama,” she said. “But I think it suits you quite well.”

Kagome frowned, aware of the artful dodge but uncertain how to counter it. The ornament was definitely above her station. Certainly she had seen other women of the court don similar ornamentation before, but they had all been the ladies of major clans or…

Or Kikyou, Kagome realized with a prickle of apprehension. The woman she could most clearly recall being arrayed in finery such as this was Kikyou.

Kagome bit her lip, trying to force down the sudden wash of unease that filled her. If this was what Midoriko and Inuyasha had chosen for her then she could bear up under her own discomfort at feeling like a bird with overbright plumage. 

Besides, she and Midoriko had been careful to arrange every detail of the ceremony around Amaterasu. It should come as no real surprise that Midoriko would want to be certain to emphasize that down to the last detail. Certainly it was known that Kagome had a rather unique connection to Amaterasu. It was only natural that they should wish to emphasize that during the ceremony.

Kagome nodded to herself. Yes, surely that was it.

“Kagome-sama, please hold still or we will end up making a mess of that fine face of yours,” chided Setsuko.

She had come to kneel at Kagome’s left side, Oshizu at her right. Both held small, slim brushes in their hands, Setsuko’s poised less than a hand’s breadth from Kagome’s face. Kagome blinked, flushing faintly.

“Sorry,” she murmured.

Setsuko shook her head, grasping her chin lightly to hold her face still. Her eyes fixed on Kagome’s mouth as she leaned in, the brush tracing the curve of her upper lip. Kagome tamped down a shiver at the cool, almost slimy sensation of it as she repeated the motion on her lower lip.

Finished, Setsuko leaned back to examine her work. She tilted Kagome’s face towards Oshizu to judge, as well, releasing her only once the other woman offered an approving nod. Oshizu then leaned in, murmuring to Kagome to close her eyes. She complied and moments later felt the slide of a brush along her lash line, the strokes sweeping outward to lengthen the line of her eyes. After that followed the light dusting of a powder over her eyelids.

“What do you think?” 

There was a faint rustling and then a light touch, fingers sweeping across a spot beside her lips.

“There, now it’s perfect,” responded Setsuko as the touch withdrew. “Please take a look, Kagome-sama.”

Obediently Kagome opened her eyes, slightly startled to immediately meet her own gaze as Oshizu lifted the small mirror up for her to examine. 

Her lips and eyelids they had painted a vivid red that perfectly complemented the color of her juni-hito. The line of the dark charcoal made her grey eyes appear hooded and somehow deeper than they usually did. 

Kagome blinked, realizing with a feeling that she could not quite place that she recognized herself. Every other time that she had been forced to go through this process she had felt as if a stranger had come out of it, fluffed and preened and utterly foreign to her. But somehow she recognized herself.

That was not to say that she was comfortable. The layers still sat heavy upon her shoulders and she was certain that at some point she would end up making a mess of the paint on her lips, but for all of that she did not feel like a stranger in her own skin for once. The woman in the mirror, for all of her finery, was still as much her as when she wore her miko robes. Or even as much her as she had been in her village, clothed in dirt and frayed robes.

Kagome reached up, pressing a hand to her chest. Even through the layers she could feel the steady thump of her heart. She nodded to herself.

“Thank you. I think I am ready.”

* * *

She wasn’t ready.

Kagome bit her lip, her stomach knotting as she peered out upon the scene before her.

Courtiers filled the clearing as far as the eye could see, hundreds of jewel-bright figures milling about as they visited with one another and found their places upon the silks that had been laid out. They were framed by rows and rows of sakura trees on either side of the clearing, bud covered branches bright green with the promise of blooms soon to come. It was the same clearing in which Kagome had attended that first fateful women’s outing what seemed like almost a lifetime ago. 

Ornate decorated carriages had been arranged by Midoriko and Kagome to bring the courtiers from the Heian-kyō out to the clearing, each arrayed in swathes of silk and filled with fresh spring flowers. Normally they would have been pulled by oxen, but Midoriko had had the stroke of brilliance to instead suggest that they use shikigami instead. At her request several of the onmyōji of the court had worked for almost two days to conjure enough of them to pull each cart, each one entirely formless so that it appeared as if the carriages drove themselves. From what Kagome had seen, the courtiers had appeared quite taken with this touch.

The ornate carriages now all sat on the edge of the clearing, the last of the courtiers trickling out of them. 

Well, not quite the last of them. Kagome let the embroidered hanging of her carriage fall shut, forcing herself to take a deep breath as she turned to look back at her companions.

“Do we have to?” she said, unable to help herself.

Midoriko pinned her with a stern look.

“Kagome…”

Beside her Inuyasha shrugged, tugging at the kanmuri beneath which the length of his hair was pinned up.

“Keh. I say we just skip out right now,” he said. “They’ll be fine on their own and I can take this stupid thing off my head. You think if I ask that thing it’ll just take us back-?”

He fell silent as Midoriko turned her look on him.

“Fine, fine, I get it. I was just messing around, anyway,” he muttered. “...sorta.”

Midoriko sighed, her eyes sliding shut, and Kagome was certain that she was struggling to keep from rolling her eyes. 

“We have planned everything down to the last detail, and done so quite well, I might add,” Midoriko said. “You both know how vital it is that we all play our roles, do you not?”

Inuyasha and Kagome shared a commiserating look before nodding, both properly chastened. 

“Good,” she said. “I will go out first and trust that the both of you will follow.”

The pair nodded. She offered them a small smile before rising, brushing her hands down the length of the ceremonial chihaya she had donned over her white kosode for the occasion. The garment hung just past her knees, pristine white and patterned beautifully with swooping red cranes. She had had the length of her heavily silver-streaked hair tied back at the nape of her neck and on her brow was an ornament composed of fresh spring flowers with delicately woven silver threads hanging down from it. 

She looked every bit the O-Miko, Kagome thought as she watched her be handed out of the carriage. 

A warm, calloused hand settled over hers and she blinked, turning back to Inuyasha.

He, too, was a sight to behold, having forsaken the traditional ceremonial kikūjin for his favored shade of crimson in his shitagasane, the material patterned all over with golden images of fearsome inu-youkai. His hakama were a matching crimson and the mass of his silver hair had been pinned up beneath the most elaborate kanmuri she had yet seen. Studying him, Kagome realized his garments actually complemented hers quite well.

“It’ll be fine,” he said, interrupting the thought. “We’ll do it just like you planned with Midoriko. We chat with the bastards for a while, we eat, and then we leave. Easy.”

Kagome frowned, eyeing him.

“That’s not exactly the plan,” she said. “But I appreciate the sentiment. I just...these things always make me so nervous. Like one misstep and…”

She trailed off, shaking her head. He squeezed her hand, a sympathetic quirk to the corner of his lips.

“Believe me, I fucking get it,” he said. “But I know you. You worry a lot and then do it better than most of those bastards could even dream. ‘Sides, we both know how important this is.”

Kagome’s eyes widened, a sudden rush of warmth filling her chest. A shy smile crept across her face and she squeezed his hand in return.

“Thank you,” she said softly. “You’re right. The appointments are crucial to everything we want to do going forward. I’ll make certain that this goes off without a hitch.”

Inuyasha frowned, his brow knitting for a moment. Then he blinked, seeming to recall something.

“The appointments,” he murmured. “Right. Yeah.”

The warmth dissipated somewhat. 

“What did you think we were talking about, Inuyasha?”

Shrugging, he shook his head in a jerky motion that he repeated a few times too many.

“The appointments,” he said hurriedly. “Obviously. That...we were obviously both talking about that.”

Kagome’s frown deepened.

“Inuyasha-”

But he had withdrawn his hand from hers, placing both hands on her shoulders to scoot her unceremoniously towards the carriage hanging.

“Midoriko’s waiting,” he said. “Better hurry or she’ll be pissed.”

“Wait-!”

It was too late, though, as a hand had already reached up at the sight of the hanging moving to assist her out of the carriage. Kagome turned back, shooting Inuyasha a glare before taking the proffered hand and stepping out into the clearing.

The chatter that filled the clearing seemed loud after the relative quiet of the carriage, the sounds sweeping over her so suddenly that she was almost disoriented. The servant handing her out of the carriage released her hand, bowing, and Kagome only just remembered to thank him before starting forward on legs that she felt oddly disconnected from.

They had arranged the space of the clearing into three distinct sections arranged around a central circle that had been left purposefully empty. This allowed the Taira, the Tachibana, and the Minamoto to arrange themselves and their minor clan branches as they wished without having to intermingle if they did not wish. Initially Kagome had thought to include a space for the Fujiwara, as well, but Midoriko had quickly pointed out that in addition to there being very few members of that clan remaining within the court the gesture was also not likely to be received very well after all that had occurred. Reluctantly Kagome had agreed.

At the head of the empty central space that the three sections surrounded they had had a raised dais constructed that would serve as Inuyasha’s place during the festivities. Kagome’s place was to be there, as well, and she fixed her eyes upon it as she moved forward.

Midoriko was already several lengths ahead of her, moving amidst the throngs of courtiers with a grace and ease that Kagome could not help but envy. Because of the centrality of her role in the ceremony she, too, had been prepared a place upon the dais which she was moving steadily towards.

Taking a deep breath, Kagome lifted her chin and schooled her features into a semblance of what she hoped was calm. She was almost close enough to be seen now and-

And there was someone at her side.

She blinked, her eyes widening as she turned her head to find Inuyasha there. He did not meet her look, his gaze fixed steadily ahead as if he had not seen her.

“What are you doing?” she hissed. “You’re supposed to wait until Midoriko-sama and I have reached the dais!”

“I got bored,” he returned. “‘Sides, you move so slow, who knows when it’ll be that you finally make it up there? And before you decide to make a stink, just know that they’re starting to look.”

One quick glance back at the crowd told her he was right. Heads were slowly beginning to turn in their direction, some of the courtiers on the fringes of the clearing having caught sight of them. Kagome knew enough to know it would be only a matter of moments before they were all aware.

She bit the inside of her cheek, well aware of the impropriety of the situation and at a loss to do anything to prevent it without making a fool of herself and possibly Inuyasha before the entire court.

“You know better than this, Inuyasha,” she murmured, so softly that she knew only his ears would be able to catch it.

“I know worse, too,” he returned. “Relax, Kagome. You wanted to give them a show, so let’s give them one.”

And with that, before she could so much as blink, he slipped his arm through hers and started purposefully forward. Kagome had to fight to keep from stumbling on the height of her geta as he lengthened his strides, the only thought she could process in that moment that one way or another she would have her revenge for this.

Thankfully he slowed his steps as they reached the outer edge of where the courtiers were arranged, allowing her a moment to once again compose herself. She straightened her shoulders and plastered on a serene smile, slipping her fan open in her hand at her side.

Almost as one they took their first step into the midst of the crowd. Kagome raised her fan, feeling a slight spark of excitement race through her. This had been meant for Inuyasha’s entrance, but she supposed there was no help for it now.

Twisting the fan in her hand, she swept it out in an expansive gesture of welcome.

Immediately a breeze kicked up, so strong that gasps and cries rippled through the crowd as robes and fans were lifted in it. At the same moment the world all around the clearing exploded into vibrant color, row after row of sakura trees bursting into full bloom.

The breeze swept around and through the vibrant pink blossoms, picking up petals and blooms alike. In mere moments the entire clearing was awash in a haze of drifting flowers, the air filled with the heady scent of spring.

Slowly Inuyasha and Kagome began to move forward, the latter’s smile growing wider at the sight of the wide-eyed awe of the courtiers around them. Petals alighted gently on hair, faces, and robes, littering the pathway beneath their feet until it had become carpeted entirely in them. Kagome had once thought that the clearing would truly be something to behold in the full bloom of spring, but she was ecstatic to realize that she had not been able to picture even the half of its dreamlike quality.

All around them courtiers bowed down as the pair passed, murmurs and exclamations of wonder and approval echoing in their wake. The beauty of the scene seemed to have overcome even the impropriety of their entrance together, for which Kagome was deeply grateful.

She was also pleased to see the respect with which many now seemed to regard Inuyasha as they passed. Hardly a single fan shifted in any gesture save that of esteem or admiration and there was nothing grudging in their bows, save for the groups that composed the main branch of the Taira clan. Knowing as she now did who controlled them, though, that was little wonder.

As they came within sight of the dais Midoriko caught Kagome’s eye, a smile so wide it deepened the lines around her eyes stretching across her face. She nodded in approval and Kagome returned the gesture with a bow of her head. 

It had been no easy feat for the two of them to call forth the kodama that inhabited this sakura grove, let alone to convince them to go along with their plan of making the sakura bloom for them. The kodama cared for little beyond the well-being of their trees, after all, so there was no material offer that they could make that would hold any interest for them. Thankfully Midoriko understood enough of their nature to know that they loved little more than the admiration of people for the beauty of nature. Promising them hundreds of admiring eyes all at once had proven enough of a temptation to get them to agree in the end.

Summoning up the wind had been an easier matter. Kagura had agreed to manipulate it readily enough when asked, the request providing her with just the pretense she needed to feed to Naraku as to how she had manipulated Kagome into choosing herself, Kanna, and Byakuya for the appointments. She would simply tell him that Kagome had reluctantly sought her out in desperation-there were very few youkai capable of controlling the winds, after all-and she had agreed in return to secure their spots. 

The pair reached the dais and Inuyasha guided Kagome to the cushion on the left, one tier down from his own. She bowed her head to Midoriko where she was seated just one tier lower on the right as Inuyasha ascended past them both, taking up his place at the head of the ceremony.

He turned out to face the crowd, the length of his hakama and shitagasane billowing in the breeze. Swathes of sakura petals continued to rain down around him as his golden eyes slowly surveyed the courtiers before him and for all her annoyance at his cavalier behavior Kagome could not help the smile that stretched across her face. It was perhaps the most regal that he had ever looked.

“Cousins,” he said at last, his voice echoing out over the crowd. “Welcome. We thank you for your presence here on this day, a day on which we gather not only to revive the traditions of old, but also to build the traditions that will define who we are to become after this. We gather to resume the appointments of my father’s time, to once more bind together a court that has been too long fractured by fear and strife. We gather to begin to build a court strong enough not only to stand united within itself, but also strong enough to unite the nation around its strength. We gather to celebrate Amaterasu’s return of light to the world, her gift of spring and the chance for rebirth that it brings with it. We gather to celebrate the gift of her light that Ametarasu has given to the Tennō, and that she gives to all she deems worthy to lead. Now, let the ceremony begin!”

At the raising of his hands the winds kicked up once more, so strong this time that for several long moments nothing was visible past the thick swirl of sakura in the air. As the wind calmed, though, a large column of petals continued to twist and writhe in the central space around which they were all situated. 

All eyes shifted towards the column, the wind making it appear almost to dance in their midst, and suddenly the deep, pulsing sound of the da-daiko drum began to echo throughout the clearing. 

Abruptly the column dissipated, dissolving into a shower of petals. In its midst was revealed the source of the drumming, a group of costumed mikagura dancers. The man at the drums sped up his tempo, the deep booming sounds increasing almost to the point of frenzy as the dancers stood as if frozen. 

Suddenly one of them let loose a yell, a high, reverberating sound that seemed to fill the entire clearing, and the other dancers began to move as one. The play had begun.

Gasps and cries went up from the crowd, fans sweeping in gestures of delight. The dancers were whirls of ornately embroidered silks, their otherworldly masks flashing out from behind fans in startling contrast to the grace of their movements. Each wore the face of a kami for the dance and held in their hands a small strand of bells that chimed in time with their every movement.

In the center stood the masked Amaterasu. In turn each of the kami moved around her, twisting and turning in their pleas for her to emerge from the cave and once more return light to the world. She in turn would pivot away from them, refusing to be moved or to show them her face.

After several turns of this the music began to swell, the beat of the drum quickening in time with the playing of the komabue as all the kami joined together to surround Amaterasu. Their bells chimed in harmony as they circled her, holding out to her their offerings that she might emerge and bring light and order to the world once more.

One by one she accepted them-the mirror, the sword, and the jewel. The other kami made their final circle around her as she stepped forth, turning slowly to present the three treasures to the crowd. 

The sky overhead, a muted cloudy grey that several had commented would surely ruin the ceremony with its gloom if not with an afternoon storm, lightened, a shaft of sunlight breaking through to shine down on the now-emerged Amaterasu. She turned, the other kami parting to make way for her. The shaft of light trailed in her wake as she made her way with deliberate steps towards the dais.

The music swelled once more as she climbed the steps and Inuyasha rose, receiving from her the three treasures. Each bowed their head to the other and Amaterasu stepped back. The shaft of light, however, remained, bathing Inuyasha in golden light as he held the three treasures aloft. 

Kagome beamed at the sight as a hush fell over the courtiers, even the music of the dance fading out. There could be no more clear picture of the Tennō than the one he made in that moment, a mixture of strength and benevolence that made her heart ache.

Her smile faded, though, as Amaterasu paused in her descent from the dais to face her. She blinked as the figure offered a hand to her, the masked face staring down into her own.

A jolt of panic went through her. This had not been a part of the plan at all. Amaterasu was supposed to descend after presenting the Tennō with the three treasures, the proof of his right to rule, and then the performance was to be finished. 

Kagome darted a glance up at Inuyasha, eyes wide. He gestured with his chin to the woman’s proffered hand, his expression strangely unperturbed by the sudden deviation. Hesitantly Kagome reached out, placing her hand within the other woman’s for lack of any better course of action.

The woman drew her up onto her feet, slowly leaning forward until her mask rested against the sun ornament up Kagome’s brow. One of her hands reached out, pressing lightly over the shoulder which bore the sun mark before withdrawing.

After a moment that felt like a small eternity to Kagome, Amaterasu pulled back. The sunlight that bathed her flared around Kagome, illuminating brilliantly the sun ornament upon her brow and the golden suns embroidered into her juni-hito. Kagome had to squint her eyes against it to keep from being blinded, only just barely able to see it as Amaterasu withdrew from her and descended to the foot of the dais.

Amaterasu bowed before the dazzled courtiers, removing the mask as she rose to reveal Midoriko. In the distraction of the breeze and the blossoms she had donned her mask and moved into the center to join the dancers. She smiled, the warmth in her eyes that of deep satisfaction as she surveyed the courtiers.

“Cousins,” she said, raising her voice to carry over the crowd. “It was the gift of Amaterasu-sama’s light that brought to this world order and the hope of a future filled with abundance for all of her children. It is this gift of light that she passes to those she deems worthy, those she knows will use her blessings to bring about that world of plenty that she so greatly desires for us. To them it is given the divine right to lead us forward. Now, in celebration of the bounties to come during this season, please enjoy the bounties we have provided before you.”

A murmur went up as the courtiers looked down at the low, long tables arranged before them, a vast array of dishes having appeared upon each one sometime during the performance. The shikigami from the carriages had made quick, quiet work of this while they were distracted, carrying the dishes in from the one carriage that had been filled with them. Midoriko had arranged for a vast number of dishes to be provided, rare Chinese delicacies mixing with lavish dishes unique to the court to create an array that could not fail to appeal to even the most refined of tastes.

The music resumed as the courtiers began to eat, fans and mouths moving rapidly in comment on the performance as they did. The light around Midoriko, Inuyasha, and Kagome dissipated, for which the latter was immensely grateful. The light was illusionary, created by a small group of tanuki that she and Midoriko had managed to find in the market who were hiding beyond the line of the sakura, but it was still a relief to be out of it.

Kagome resumed her place kneeling on the dais, eyeing Midoriko as the elder miko did the same below her. 

“Midoriko-sama,” she murmured lowly as soon as she was certain that the courtiers' attention was no longer focused upon them. 

Midoriko made a faint sound of acknowledgement, her eyes following several dishes as they bobbed towards her in the invisible hands of the shikigami. They set them down with a clatter before her and Midoriko took up her hashi.

“I do not recall us discussing that last bit when we spoke of the performance,” Kagome continued, unable to help the faintly accusatory note that crept into her voice.

For several moments Midoriko did not respond, chewing slowly at her food. Her expression betrayed nothing, but she would not meet Kagome’s eye.

“Well, the Tennō-sama and I discussed it,” she said at last. “And we felt that there was no harm in reminding the court of your strong connection to Amaterasu-sama. There are not many who can claim a personal connection to a kami, after all, let alone to her.”

“The Tennō-sama…?”

Kagome turned her head sharply, pinning Inuyasha with a look. He froze, hashi halfway in his mouth as he took a bite. He winced faintly around the mouthful at the sight of her.

“Is this what the two of you have been conspiring about?” Kagome hissed. “These clothes and performance? This ceremony is supposed to be about you and your connection to Amaterasu and the courtiers through the appointments. Why distract everyone? And why not at least warn me about it?”

“We were hardly conspiring-”

“You woulda said no-”

Midoriko and Inuyasha both paused, glancing at one another. Midoriko inclined her head to indicate he could continue. 

“If it’s my ceremony, then I get to decide what’s included,” he said. “And I think it’s just as important that they understand your position here as mine.”

“His Majesty is right,” Midoriko said. “Intended or not, you have taken on a large role here in the court. It is well past time that they come to acknowledge that-to acknowledge you.”

She offered her a small smile before turning back to resume her meal. Kagome glanced from her to Inuyasha, though his attention was likewise back on his food. She frowned, the niggling feeling that she was missing something important tugging at her.

Inuyasha caught her look, his eyes narrowing. He swallowed, gesturing with his hashi to the food in front of her.

“Eat,” he said. “This is the only chance you’ll get until the ceremonie’s over and I don’t wanna hear your stomach grumbling.”

Kagome wanted to protest, to demand he give her some sort of explanation that she could understand for the oddity of his and Midoriko’s behavior. Still, now was neither the time nor the place for it. She could not allow any appearance of dissension between them before the court.

Besides, despite everything she was hungry. Reluctantly she took up her hashi, vowing to herself that she would get answers from them both later.

As she ate she surreptitiously observed the courtiers. So far everything had gone off without a hitch-barring perhaps the little deviations that Midoriko and Inuyasha had thrown at her- and the mood among the courtiers seemed good overall. There was little they could complain of in terms of the ceremony, Midoriko had seen to that. The sight that the clearing made, sakura petals stirring on the breeze and carpeting the ground, was nothing short of wondrous. The use of the shikigami had been inspired, likely a first in the court, and the troupe that they had hired to perform the mikagura were amazingly skilled. The food and the music of the gagaku were beyond reproach, as well.

Still, here and there she could see odd fan gestures being exchanged. Short, sharp gestures of incredulity and surprise, even gestures of shock from some. The gestures were scattered here and there throughout all three of the groups. From her place on the dais it was impossible to catch wind of any words that might accompany these silent conversations, frustrating Kagome to no end as she attempted to puzzle out what the gestures might mean. 

They could simply be in regards to the ceremony, surprise at one or another of the unique aspects of it. Somehow, though, that did not seem to fit. There was something more to them, some deeper upset that she could not quite place.

Before she could come to any real conclusions, her attention was diverted by a gesture from Midoriko. The elder miko glanced up at her, gesturing toward the troupe of performers in the central space. Kagome had been so preoccupied that she had failed to notice that they had ceased playing. It was time, then. 

She instantly regretted the food she had just consumed, her stomach clenching uneasily around it.There was no helping it, though. However reluctantly, she had agreed to this.

Taking a steadying breath, she forced herself to rise and descend the dais. She could feel the weight of the courtiers’ gazes like a physical force as she moved forward toward the central space, the performers there parting at her approach to leave only one masked woman kneeling with a yamatogoto before her.

Kagome stopped beside the woman, forcing herself to pause and allow her eyes to sweep out over the crowd. She slid her fan open at her side, bringing it slowly up to cover her face. Taking up the signal, the masked woman plucked the first low, ringing note on the yamatogoto.

Kagome shifted, drawing the fan down from her face. She twisted it in her grasp, sweeping it out before her before lifting it to rest beneath her chin. A shaft of light once more broke through the gloom of the clouds above, illuminating her.

Taking a deep breath, Kagome sang:

_“Ten thousand years of_  
_Spring begins_  
_From today_  
_Shall we serve humbly_  
_Greeting the coming year…_

_Yorozu yo no_  
_Haru no hajime no_  
_Kyō shi yori_  
_Tsukaematsuramu_  
_Toshi ni aitsutsu…”_

The last notes of the yamatogoto shivered in the air as her voice trailed off. Kagome opened her eyes, hardly having realized that she had closed them, and swept her fan out in a gesture of completion before bowing her head to the crowd. She bowed also to the woman at her side, sweeping her fan in a gesture of thanks that the woman returned with a deep bow.

The thrumming of her pulse echoed in her ears, almost drowning out the chatter from the crowd around her. Absently she noted the bright sweeps of color all throughout the crowd that were waving of fans, but she forced her attention away from trying to decipher what each might mean. She raised her arms, refocusing their attention and schooling her features into what she hoped was a look of serene authority. She doubted its effect, though, as she could feel beads of sweat beginning to form at the neck of her robes.

“Cousins,” she said, her voice as carrying as she could make it. “I offer up this composition to the glory of the Tennō-sama, long may his Majesty’s reign be. I thank you again for joining with us on this day to celebrate the old and the new. We have shown you already the honored traditions of old-the re-emergence of Amaterasu-sama’s light into the world and her gift of that light to the Tennō-sama.”

“Now it is time that we speak of the new, particularly the new bonds that we will forge today between your clans and his Majesty. Too long this court has been allowed to exist divided. Too long have fear and greed reigned here. We cast no blame for it. It is only too easy to be led astray. We ask only that you move forward with us in good faith and in the desire not only to restore what once was, but to improve it. As spring begins the rebirth of our lands, so let us all be reborn with it.”

She paused, her eyes sweeping out over the crowd. To her great surprise they were utterly still, hundreds of eyes fixated on her as if they could not look away. She had their attention. Perhaps they could understand her, then.

Kagome took a deep breath, lowering her arms. With hands that trembled slightly she reached into the depth of her sleeve and pulled out the small piece of parchment on which she had transcribed the names Chūsei had given her before the ceremony. She unrolled it before lifting her gaze back to the crowd.

“In this the season of Amaterasu-sama’s return, the O-Miko-sama and myself thought it most fitting to pray to her for guidance as to those best suited to come into the Dairi to begin the task of reunifying the court with his Majesty,” Kagome said. “Here I have written the names that Amaterasu-sama in her infinite wisdom has provided to us. If you hear your name called, please rise and join me here.”

She lifted the parchment, reading out the names there. There were sixty-seven in total, three taken from each of the three remaining major clans and two from every minor clan that numbered over fifty members. As she spoke their names, each rose and moved to join her in the center. As they moved the same beam of light that illuminated Kagome spread to them until at last the entire central space was bathed in warm, golden light. The wind kicked up once more, as well, sakura blossoms filling the air with their gentle scent.

Kagome looked around when she had finished, many of the faces familiar though most she had never put a name to before. Among them she even knew a few-Kagura, of course, and to a lesser degree her sister Taira Kanna. Tachibana Hisana, Sango’s cousin who had been so kind to her when she was yet new to the court. And Akitoki Hōjō, beaming at her with such a look of pride on his face that she could not help but smile in return.

It was he who was the first to bow before her. He knelt down, bowing until his face nearly touched the carpet of sakura petals that covered the ground. After a moment’s pause the others followed his lead, kneeling and bowing low before her. Kagura, Kanna, and Byakuya were the last to follow suit, but even they submitted at last to the necessity of it.

Bathed in golden light, sakura blossoms dancing through the air all around her, Kagome looked up those rows of bowed heads and felt a surge of certainty so strong that it trembled through her limbs.

Glancing back, she met Inuyasha’s eyes and saw in them the same glow that she knew must also be in her own. Because she knew.

They had finally found it. This was the path to their future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Imugi: In Korean mythology, most dragons were originally Imugi (possibly Imoogi depending on how the word is transcribed), which resemble giant serpents. Per that same mythology, if an imugi could survive for a thousand years it could then become a dragon.
> 
> -Wakō/Waegu: The first is the Japanese word and the second the Korean word (the Chinese had a third term for them) for the pirates that raided primarily the Chinese and Korean coasts during the late Heian period. The pirates were mixed in ethnicity (Korean, Chinese, and Japanese among them) and raided indiscriminately among the nations.
> 
> -Hyōgo/Menōmaru: You all probably know this already, but for those who didn’t see the Affections Touching Across Time movie, Menōmaru was a moth youkai and the villain of that film. He was attempting to get revenge for his father Hyōgo who Inuyasha’s father had sealed away hundreds of years earlier when Hyōgo came with an invading force from mainland Asia. Inu no Taishō defended Japan and drove the force back while sealing him away. Obviously I cherry-picked some details from this to use in this story.
> 
> -Shikigami: beings that could be summoned/created by Onmyōji through a complex conjuring ceremony. Sometimes they are said to be formless, other times they have definite shape but can only be seen by their summoner, and other times they are clearly visible spirits/beings. To Westernize the concept a little bit, think of the relationship between witches and their familiars.
> 
> -Onmyōji: practitioners of Onmyōdō, a philosophy that mixed the ideas of the Five Elements and yin and yang (to severely oversimplify it) and that came into prominence during the Heian period and which came to have a large impact on court life. 
> 
> -Chihaya: A kind of ceremonial overcoat with a long white hem worn by miko in certain Shintō ceremonies. If you want a reference for any of what Midoriko is wearing during the ceremony, just look up any kind of shrine maiden/miko dance or ceremonial performance and you’ll have a good idea (plus a lot of beautiful visuals to look at, so win-win).
> 
> -Kodama: spirits in Japanese folklore that inhabit trees. If you’ve ever seen Princess Mononoke, they’re the tiny, doll-like white figures that emerge in the forests and sit all over the trees.
> 
> -Mikagura: a type of kagura dance performed specifically within the imperial court. 
> 
> -Imperial regalia/the three treasures of Amaterasu: The Three Sacred Treasures are the imperial regalia of Japan and consist of the sword Kusanagi no Tsurugi, the mirror Yata no Kagami, and the jewel Yasakani no Magatama. They represent the three primary virtues: valor (the sword), wisdom (the mirror), and benevolence (the jewel) and are said to have been passed down from Amaterasu after she emerged from the cave. Also, for those not familiar with the story of Amaterasu and the cave, the Sparknotes version is that one of Amaterasu’s fellow kami said/did something that she didn’t like and she decided to hide herself away in a cave. The other kami quickly realized that with her light gone the world was being plunged back into darkness and chaos. So they all get together at the mouth of the cave she’s hiding in and try to coax her out by having a party so fun that she won’t be able to resist it (one even does some sort of striptease if I’m remembering it right). Eventually they hang a mirror and a jewel out front of the cave, which she catches the reflection of her own light in, drawing her out to it. Once she’s out they give her the sword as an apology for having driven her into the cave in the first place. These become the imperial regalia/three sacred treasures that she passes down to her descendant, the Emperor of Japan, as proof of his right to rule.
> 
> -Toshigoi: I didn’t explicitly mention it in this chapter, but there were actual spring ceremonies that were traditionally held in Heian Japan (and up to the current day) in shrines throughout the country. These were commonly referred to as Toshigoi and were usually held at prominent shrines and involved the Emperor sending goods to various shrines to kind of ‘rank’ them in their allegiance/importance to the court. That obviously doesn’t play in too much in this story, I just drew the historical inspiration for my ceremony from this idea.
> 
> -Waka poetry/spring poem/Kinyō Wakashū: Waka poetry is the kind that Kagome recites during the ceremony, the actual poem itself being one written by Fujiwara no Nakazane and recorded in a text called the Kinyō Wakashū that was filled with other poems written during the Heian period. Waka was the poetry style most popular during the time and was considered the height of refinement with poetry competitions sometimes being held to gain status within the court. The verses Kagome recites are the romaji Japanese version of the words and the English translation of the poem, so essentially the same verse recited twice. 


	34. Of Mirrors and the Ministry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mini-history lesson is at the end of the chapter. I won’t ramble on too much here as I have already delayed this chapter enough. Enjoy!

From the time she was young, Kagome had always felt privacy to be a rare and precious thing.

After all, there was so little of it to be found in her village. When she woke in the mornings there, it was to the soft, sleepy shufflings of her family all around her. When she went out into the village, be it to work alongside Kaede or to assist out in the fields, she was seldom alone. When she ate, it was always in the company of her family or Kaede or sometimes the entire village if there was a celebration of some sort going on. And when she slept once more it was always with the warm press of her family on all sides of her.

Even bathing was an activity one rarely performed on one’s own in the village. In the infrequent instances when they had the luxury of a full soak-they were much more likely to opt for a quick rinse of their hands and arms and faces-they all knew that they would leave themselves far too vulnerable should they go down to the river alone. Thus they tended to coordinate these outings, women and children all choosing one day and men another.

Coming into the court, Kagome had been surprised at the amount of privacy that was suddenly so readily available to her. She slept alone, sometimes ate alone. At almost any moment on any given day she could remove herself, simply slip out into a garden or some infrequently used room to have a moment on her own. It was strange, an aspect of court life that she valued and was discomfited by by turns. 

At some point, though, Kagome reflected, she must have grown accustomed to it because she sorely missed it now.

She held a sigh tightly in check behind her teeth, her smile fixed as her eyes swept over the circle of women around her. As always, their eyes were fixed upon her, parsing and measuring and missing nothing. 

It had been a mere five days since the ceremony, a mere four days since the appointees had been moved into the Dairi, and Kagome had not known a moment of privacy since. When she woke, it was to one of the women ready to attend her in her preparations for the day. When she ate, it was in the company of the entire group. In the afternoons she would meet with the women in smaller groups in an effort to get to know them. And at night the cycle would start anew, another woman awaiting her at her residence to prepare her for bed and remain with her.

In the four days since the appointments had been moved in, Kagome had not been able to leave the Dairi even once. Her new duties to the women occupied her wholly, leaving her no time to assist Midoriko around the court or to continue the strolls as she wished to. 

Her time with Inuyasha had been so impeded as to be nearly non-existent, a fact that bothered her far more than she cared to admit even to herself. Even though they were constantly in close proximity, both of them in the Dairi for almost the entirety of their days, they were scarcely able to speak two words to one another without several ears listening in.

She needed to move things along somehow. Something needed to shift. Only she had no idea what.

She bit back another sigh.

* * *

“Did you ever think about what your life would look like? Before all this, I mean.”

Kagome jumped slightly, startled by the words despite how softly they had been spoken. She turned her head, careful not to move too quickly lest she tug at the hair that the woman behind her still held between her hands.

Her name was Nakatomi Katsumi. She was the eldest daughter of a minor clan that allied themselves with the Tachibana, but beyond that Kagome knew very little about her. The few times that she had been able to observe her among the other appointees, it was only to notice how reticent she was. She had never seen her speak without being spoken to first and she wore an air of practiced disinterest like a second skin, though her eyes were always sharp, always observing.

She was also incredibly beautiful. Though her hair was not quite so long as the style of the court usually dictated, it had the dark, liquid look of a starless night. Likewise were her eyes, so dark they almost appeared to be all pupil and framed by a fan of dark lashes. Her features were almost perfectly rounded and her skin snow-pale, the combination lending her face all the radiance of a luminous full moon. 

Tonight was her night to serve as handmaid and, after a few abortive attempts at making conversation, Kagome had largely resigned herself to a night of silence in her company. She blinked, uncertain if the woman had actually spoken or if she had imagined it.

A faint frown edged Katsumi’s lips, her gaze dropping back to the locks of hair and comb in her hands.

“Apologies,” she said, voice scarcely rising above a whisper. “That was impertinent of me. I will attend to my duties, O-Miko-sama.”

Kagome reached out, placing a hand over hers before she could. Katsumi glanced up at her through the fringe of her lashes, eyes rounding.

“You need not apologize,” Kagome said quickly. “I was merely surprised. Please, be at your ease. You need not stand on ceremony with me.”

Katsumi blinked, her expression still wary. Slowly she set down the comb, allowing Kagome’s hair to slip from her fingers. She folded her hands together, unable to fully lift her gaze to meet Kagome’s.

“I only...I only thought…” she said, her voice still so low that Kagome had to lean in to hear her. “That is, I wondered...what does life look like for us outside of the court? If you had never come here, how would you have lived?”

She glanced up, eyes wide with a kind of seeking that Kagome could not quite understand. She frowned, considering the question.

“I suppose I didn’t think on it very often,” she said at length. “Or perhaps there really wasn’t anything to think on. Before all of this, I knew what my life would look like. I would have served as the miko of my village, for as long as I could. Trained a successor, if one could have been found. I’d have toiled alongside the other villagers, worked to ensure that we had food and shelter and protection.”

Katsumi’s look sharpened, her dark eyes searching Kagome’s as if she could pull further answers from them. She shook her head, a faint frown curling down the corners of her lips.

“What of marriage?” she said. “Or children? Who would secure your family’s position within the village if you did not produce heirs?”

Kagome shook her head.

“It doesn’t exactly work for us like that,” she said. “We’ve no real position to worry about securing. In the villages children tend to be more for the sake of having helping hands around the home or in the fields or when one grows too old to care for one’s self any longer. I...I doubt that I would ever have married or had children, but I have a younger brother. I suppose he’s likely to have children some day, to keep our family going and to care for our mother and grandfather when the time comes.”

Katsumi tilted her head, dark eyes sharp as she considered this. Kagome shifted, slightly uneasy beneath the intensity of her stare and the thoughts of her family and the village that the question had stirred.

“Was that what you wanted, then?” Katsumi said at last. “That life?”

Kagome blinked, the blunt question hardly one she would have expected from the reserved woman. Nor was it one she particularly cared to dwell on. She clasped her hands in her lap, gaze falling to them.

“Not always,” she settled on after several moments. 

Katsumi was silent for a stretch and Kagome hazarded a glance up at her. Her eyes were bright, expression tense as she seemed to grapple with some line of thought.

“I have always known what my life would be,” she said suddenly, the words escaping her in a hurried burst. “Since birth, it seems. ‘Katsumi’-they hoped that I would be beautiful, and so my parents called me thus. A self-fulfilling prophecy, it seems. They hoped that I would be beautiful, because that was the best hope they could have for me.”

She paused, her hands clenching and unclenching slowly in the fabric of her juni-hito in her lap. She sucked in a breath, her eyes sliding closed against the force of some emotion.

“Being only a minor clan, my parents understood that no matter how beautiful I was it was nigh impossible that I should ever become Empress,” she continued. “But a concubine...that was within their reach. And who was to say, if I was chosen by the Tennō-sama quickly enough, that I should not be the first to bear his Majesty a son? A position of unique power for any clan to be in.”

When she opened her eyes once more, tears clung brightly to her lashes, though they did not fall. Her dark eyes glittered, sharp as any blade. Unconsciously Kagome reached out, drawn by the woman’s obvious pain, but Katsumi shook her head and she froze.

“When the current Tennō-sama was named successor and finally assumed the throne, they were quite disappointed to find that his Majesty appeared to have no interest in concubines,” she said, and Kagome could hear the strain in her voice to keep her words level in the tremble of them. “Such a waste, they thought, to have a daughter so beautiful born to them at exactly the wrong moment. And I...I will confess to having been relieved.”

The tears began to fall at last, tracking bright trails down her cheeks in the light of the lanterns. Katsumi made no move to hide them, and Kagome could only watch transfixed as she pressed on.

“I felt as if I had been spared. I felt as if I had been spirited away by a kami and placed atop a mountain peak, lands stretching out in every direction beneath me. Suddenly there was nothing before me, and yet to me it seemed like everything.”

She paused, drawing a deep, shuddering breath, her hands clenching against the wood of the floor between them as she leaned forward to support herself. 

“And now I find myself here,” she said, her words scarcely above a whisper. “And my family is overjoyed. They tell me that surely this must be my fate, to have so much stacked against me and yet to somehow still have ended up at the Tennō-sama’s side in the Dairi. And I try to tell it to myself...I tell it to myself over and over. This must be my fate. This must be it, be what I was made for. What else could it be, if everything leads me back to this? And moreover I should be grateful. There are so many worse...there is so much worse….”

Kagome watched as she struggled to finish, but the tears were coming so thick and fast now that there was no room left for words. She reached out, her hand clutching at one of Katsumi’s trembling fists. Katsumi’s throat worked as she visibly struggled to swallow back the force of her feelings and Kagome felt a lump swell in her own.

“Wait,” she said, grateful for the miraculous steadiness of her own voice. “Just...wait, Nakatomi-sama. Hold on.”

She gripped her hand more tightly, meeting the other woman’s tear-bright eyes. Katsumi blinked hard, her chest nearly heaving with the force of her feelings.

“His Majesty….His Majesty has no desire to force anyone,” she pressed on. “Into anything. Be it wife or concubine or what have you. You won’t ever be made to do anything you do not wish to do. I swear it.”

Katsumi met her eyes, drawing in several short, sharp breaths as she took in her words. Slowly some of the desperation seemed to go out of her eyes, but it left behind a hollowness in its wake. Katsumi shook her head, a small, helpless gesture.

“Then what?” she said. “What am I to be, here or anywhere else? What am I to tell my clan? My parents? That I had the chance that they wished for me from the moment of my birth and I had not the strength to pursue it? That I had everything I could hope for at my fingertips and I pushed it away with both hands?”

“Should I tell them that the thought of being a wife, of being a mother, has always been a foreign one to me? Should I tell them that even when I thought I was free, even when I felt that I stood atop that peak with everything before me, that I was still terrified? Because even everything can look like nothing when you’ve got no place in any of it.”

Her hand trembled so violently beneath Kagome’s own that the miko felt the quaking echo through her own limbs. She felt her own eyes prick, her vision blurring as she struggled to form words past the lump in her throat. 

Because what could she say to that? What could she say to a sentiment that she understood so well?

Perhaps the trappings were different, but it had been much the same in her village. Wife, mother, miko. These were the paths that had been open to her. And was it truly so different here? Even Sango and her cousins had said as much to her, though perhaps she had not truly understood the depth of it at the time. 

So what could possibly be said to this?

“...what do you want to be?”

Katsumi blinked, her dark eyes widening. Her lips worked soundlessly for several long moments before she shook her head, her eyes sliding shut.

“I can...I can appreciate the sentiment, O-Miko-sama, but p-please do not offer something that’s not in your power,” she said at last. “I understand now only too well that to have something and lose it can be far worse than never having had it at all.”

Kagome nodded, swallowing back further tears. She swiped at her eyes with her free hand.

“I understand,” she said. “And truthfully I do not know if it is in my power. I can promise you safety here. I can swear to you that you will never be made to do anything against your will. But...I would like to be able to offer you more than just an escape from a future you do not want. We...Amaterasu-sama brought each of you to us for a purpose. To build a better future for all of us, together. So, if I could offer it, what would it look like for you?”

Katsumi blinked, red-rimmed eyes widening. Her gaze fell to where Kagome’s hand still rested over her own and she shook her head.

“Truthfully, I cannot say that I know,” she said softly. “I’ve spent so much of my life trying to resign myself to a fate that I felt I could not fight that I never thought much on what a life I would want might look like.”

Kagome squeezed her hand, offering her a small smile when she glanced up.

“Then maybe now is the time to begin.”

* * *

In the days that followed Kagome quickly realized that Katsumi was far from the only one feeling as she did about her new situation. Now that her eyes were opened to it, she could see the uncertainty in the other women as clear as day as they moved through the Dairi and around Inuyasha. And she could not help but feel that in many ways she had been terribly remiss in her treatment of them.

She had thought of the necessity of Inuyasha taking an Empress and producing an heir. She had thought of their duty to the court and to the villages. She had even spared a thought for her own pain in all of this at the probability that her time with Inuyasha as it was was likely coming to an end. 

But she had never once considered what this must be for the women. The uncertainty of being taken from the homes that they had known all their lives and brought suddenly into the Dairi. The feeling that they were being trotted out before the Tennō to be wife or mistress or concubine or nothing at all with no idea and little say in which it would be. She had not even thought to wonder if this was something that they had ever wanted for themselves.

Not to say that some of the women were not amenable to the idea, whichever it might be. As Kagome spoke to them in the following days, truly spoke to them for perhaps the first time since they had been named as appointees, she found several among them who would readily take up whichever mantle Inuyasha might offer them. Somehow these discussions were almost more difficult for her to have than the ones she had with the others, but she knew that they were just as essential despite her discomfort.

Many of them, however, were as uncertain and frightened as Katsumi was. They knew little of the Tennō beyond what they had been told and the handful of moments that they had been allowed to observe, much of which was either unflattering or intimidating. They waited with baited breath to see what sort of man he was, to see how they were to be treated, to find out what their lives were to be. And all the while their hopes simmered just beneath the surface for what their lives might be outside of all of this.

It took Kagome a little over five days to speak to all of the women she was now charged with and to get each of them to speak as candidly with her as she could hope. Katsumi was a great ally in opening a path for her in this endeavor, assuring any of the women who would listen that Kagome was open to hearing them and that there would be no repercussions for them speaking their minds to her. And after all of that, Kagome found herself exhausted and perhaps more abashed than she had ever been before.

Now she sat in Inuyasha’s chambers, sorely tempted to lay down and rest her eyes as she awaited his arrival. She had sent him a note requesting an audience with him earlier in the day and had received a response to meet him in his chambers around the evening meal time. She was grateful for his foresight in that as the evening meal was one of the few times where her presence was not essential and would not be too sorely missed, the women being largely occupied with one another and their meals. She imagined it must be the same for him.

The whisper of the door hanging being pushed aside roused her from her stupor. Kagome jerked up, surprised to find that at some point she must have laid her head down and dozed. She blinked, bringing a hand up to rub at her bleary eyes as she turned towards the entryway of the room.

But Inuyasha was already at her side, kneeling down and peering anxiously into her face. She felt more than saw it as his hand came to rest against her forehead, the back of his palm almost startlingly warm against the skin there.

“Hey, you alright?”

Kagome blinked, unsure if she was more disoriented from having been roused from her impromptu nap or by the realization that this was the first time in over a week that she was able to be alone with Inuyasha for more than a handful of moments. Had his eyes always been quite that shade of gold?

“Kagome?”

“Sorry,” she said, shaking her head. “Sorry. I think I accidentally fell asleep while waiting. I’m alright.”

He eyed her for a moment longer, clearly not entirely satisfied with this answer. His eyes roved her face until they reached her lips, catching and fixing there. His hand shifted, sliding down to cup her jaw as he slowly leaned forward…

Only to be stopped by her palm sliding up between them. His eyes narrowed and she winced.

“We haven’t got a lot of time,” she said sheepishly, pulling her hand away. “And we’ve no way of knowing who might come looking for us.”

The glare remained and he muttered something that she decided she was better off not understanding. 

“I need to speak to you,” she pressed on.

He quirked a brow as if to say that much was obvious, but waited for her to go on.

“It’s about the women,” she continued.

“Pains in the ass?” he said.

She frowned, leveling him with a withering look.

“What?” he said. “‘S what the men are! Bunch of absolute pains in the ass, always talking and smiling and looking at me. I have to go to sleep just to get a fucking break.”

Her frown slipped a notch, though she tried to stifle the sympathetic twinge she felt at the words. While their feelings about the situation they now found themselves in might be far more similar than she would have thought, she had not summoned him here to air her grievances.

“I have been talking to the women,” she said, shaking her head. “In fact, I have done nothing but talk and listen and talk and listen for what feels like an age but has scarcely been a few days and I...I need your help. I’ve no idea where to go from here and I’ve been wrong about so many things.”

“What d’you mean?”

“When we...I...when I decided on the appointments as a way forward, I thought that I understood what that meant,” Kagome said. “I thought it was just something that the courtiers knew and that they would accept as I accepted it-without thought, without question. And they do, they are willing to, but...I never stopped to think what it must mean for the women. To be brought here knowing that...that…”

“That they don’t get to decide what happens?”

Kagome blinked, her gaze darting up to his face. Inuyasha did not meet her eyes, a faint curl of disgust tugging down the corners of his lips.

“My mother was supposed to be married to some bastard courtier,” he said at her surprised look. “She told me about it once when I was young, before she had to leave. Her clan had offered her to his clan as a trade for some land. She said it hadn’t bothered her, that she’d always known that that’s what was gonna happen to her eventually because that’s what they’d told her her whole life, but that she just hated it when they told her about the land. Like she could’ve dealt with it until she realized that she was the same as land to all of those bastards.”

“And then my old man came along and she said she loved him, but it’s not like he was any fucking better than any of them. He just took what he wanted and didn’t give a shit about the rest, about whether they’d break her engagement or whether the whole fucking court would harass her or....fuck, I dunno, Kagome, maybe he loved her, but he wasn’t much better. He just took. So I get it.”

Kagome gaped at him, her heart twisting in her chest. Because of what they had been through together outside of the court she knew a good deal about his mother and father, but this was a piece that Inuyasha had never shared with her before. She sucked in a breath, something clicking suddenly into place for her.

“Was this why you were so set against the appointments?”

Inuyasha’s gaze shifted up to her, his brow furrowing incredulously. His eyes lingered on her face for several long seconds before he scoffed, shaking his head.

“Not exactly,” he muttered. “But it didn’t help.”

Kagome bit her lip.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“Don’t be,” he said. “There’s no way you coulda known.”

“I could have,” she countered. “About them if not about your mother. All it would have taken was a bit of thought for them, but I didn’t even spare that. And I’m sorry for that, but I’ve no idea where to go from being sorry. It’s not as if they dislike you. Far from it for most of them. And I know that several of them would be happy to be...to be chosen by you. But they also want more. They want...they want a choice. And I’ve no idea how to go about giving that to them.”

She shrugged, feeling the prick of those same helpless tears she had shed the night Katsumi had spoken to her. Before she could sink too far into her frustration, though, she felt a sharp tug at the end of a lock of her hair. A surprised yelp escaped her and she leveled Inuyasha with a sharp look.

“What do you wanna do?” he said, tugging unrepentantly though a bit more gently at the strands of hair in his grasp.

Kagome met his look and saw the unspoken offer there. He trusted her to choose. Whatever she chose he would fight for it.

“Choices,” she said softly. “The same as anyone else.”

“Then that’s what we do. We figure out how to give them a choice.”

It was hardly a plan. It was barely even a concept really. But they had accomplished far more outlandish things together with far less to start with. She nodded.

The corner of his mouth turned up faintly and he nodded in return. 

“They’re running you ragged, huh?” he said.

Kagome breathed a sigh that she felt as though she had been holding in for weeks. She leaned her head against the hand that was still twined in her hair, tempted to close her eyes once more and doze off. 

“You’ve no idea,” she murmured. “I’ve hardly slept in days.”

Inuyasha scoffed.

“You think mine are any better?” he said. “They never shut up. And that one, Hobo or whatever, is always yammering about you. Yesterday just to get him to shut up I almost told him that we-”

He cut himself off as her eyes snapped open, wide with alarm. Something in his gaze dimmed and his hand fell away from her face.

“I didn’t,” he said quietly. “I didn’t say it.”

But it was too late. The outside world fell between them and with it a wall of silence that neither knew how to pierce.

“I should go,” Kagome said, though nothing in her wished to. “The women will be finishing dinner soon and they will wonder where I am. Perhaps we can meet in the next few days to discuss the next steps.”

Before the sentence was even finished she had already risen to her feet. She had scarcely allowed herself more than a handful of moments since the appointees had moved into the Dairi to dwell on these thoughts of herself and Inuyasha and how rapidly they were moving towards the moment when there would be no herself and Inuyasha to even dwell on. And in the silence between them she could almost hear those thoughts clamoring for her attention. Better to go now, and quickly, before they could distract her.

Her hand was scarcely a finger’s breadth from the entryway hanging when she felt the warmth of his hand wrap around her wrist. Kagome froze, held less by his grip than by the feel of him just behind her.

“Wait,” he said, a low sound that rumbled along her skin like thunder. “Just wait.”

Wait she did, but no more words were forthcoming. Instead the hand on her wrist guided her gently away from the entryway, guided her until she was cornered figuratively and literally. 

Kagome found her eyes level with his red-clad chest and she fixed them there, tensing. Half of her wanted to resume fleeing while the other half wanted nothing more than to lean her head against that solid chest and rest, and so she did neither. 

Thankfully Inuyasha did not seem to be similarly afflicted. She felt his arms go around her, steady and so warm.

“Just wait,” he said again.

“I should go,” she said, the words as flimsy moth-eaten silk.

But then his lips were hot against her throat, almost burning as they brushed her pulse point. His tongue skimmed lightly over the delicate flesh there, fangs grazing it in a way that made her skin suddenly feel too hot and too tight. A shudder ran through her, and she wondered giddily if he had always been this warm and it had simply been so long that she had forgotten.

That thought and any others were quickly driven from her head, though, as he pressed her more firmly against the wood of the wall behind her, lips and tongue still working fervently. He lifted her as if she weighed no more than a feather-she supposed with his strength that was not far from the truth- before settling eagerly between her parted thighs. A shaky little sound escaped her along with the last of her will to leave, her hands scrabbling for purchase on his shoulders as the length of him was pressed fully against her from chest to hip.

He rutted against her, hips rocking deeply into the cradle of hers in a motion that tore a low groan from him. Kagome’s fingers curled into the fabric of his haori, her own moan swallowed greedily as his lips shifted to slant across hers. She could feel the length of him already hard and straining against her even through the layers of clothing between him and she hitched her legs up higher on his hips, deepening the friction of the movement. 

“Shit,” he murmured against her lips, the hand at her waist flexing spasmodically. “Shit, I missed this.”

His tongue swept against hers, seeking, stroking. She met it with her own, one of her hands slipping in past the fabric of his collar to trace the stark ridge of his collarbone. The flesh there was as searingly hot as the rest of him, but somehow the feeling of that hard line beneath her fingertips grounded her enough to keep her mind from dissolving into a puff of steam as she feared it might.

“It’s only...been a few days,” she managed between clashes of lips and teeth and tongue.

He paused, pulling back just enough to shoot her a sharp look that was somewhat undermined by panting breaths and hooded eyes. His free hand shifted, leaving a trail of simmering heat in its wake as it slid up the length of her from hip to torso to cup her breast through the fabric of her robes. At the same moment he flexed his hips purposefully against hers, the two sensations combined enough to make Kagome’s toes curl. Her head fell back with a faint thump against the wood of the wall, a small, strangled sound escaping her. 

Inuyasha groaned, lips returning to the exposed line of her throat like a moth to a flame.

“P-Point taken,” she gasped.

A low, satisfied sound was his only response, the sound of it sliding along her skin like a caress. Inuyasha’s hand shifted, pressing past the edge of her robes to cup her breast fully in a calloused palm. He kneaded the flesh there, clawed thumb tracing tight circles around her peaked nipple through the fabric of her bindings. Kagome swallowed a whimper, thighs flexing around his hips to draw him in closer as his thrusts against her grew frantic. 

“Please…” she breathed.

But he was already moving, the hand that had been on her hip now fumbling between them at the ties to first hers and then his hakama. He shifted, his weight against her and her thighs around his hips holding her suspended as he freed himself. Another shift and she could feel the head of him pressing against her, her hakama slipping down her legs to pool at her feet.

Inuyasha met her eyes, his look seeking. She nodded, shifting her hips as much as she was able to bring herself closer to him. 

There was no stifling the yelp that escaped her as he slid into her in one smooth, sharp motion, burying himself to the hilt. It was a dizzying sensation, so keen it bordered on pain as she stretched and clenched around him.

“Fuck, sorry,” he murmured, and she could feel him shuddering against her with the effort it took to remain still. “Kami, you’re so wet I just...Are you…?”

“I’m alright,” she said, sucking in a breath through her teeth.

She flexed her hips experimentally against him, hissing in another breath at the sensation that even that small movement sent lancing through her. She clenched around him, ankles crossing behind his hips in an effort to draw him in even closer.

Inuyasha’s moan was muffled against her shoulder, the hand that still cupped her breast flexing against the tender flesh. His free arm snaked itself around her waist, simultaneously steadying her and pressing her further down against him. Kagome whimpered, head falling forward until her forehead bumped lightly against his own. 

“Fuck,” Inuyasha murmured, eyes screwed shut against the strength of the sensation.

“Agreed,” she breathed, an experimental flexing of his hips against her almost enough to drive her out of her own mind.

Inuyasha’s eyes slid open, one dark brow quirking. He repeated the motion, fighting back a shudder of his own in favor of watching her face. The corner of his mouth tipped up into a slow smirk.

“You almost swore.”

Kagome blinked, tried to gather enough of her wits to process the words. She frowned.

“I did not,” she said, the last word dissolving into a gasp as Inuyasha pressed up into her in a deep flex of his hips.

“Close enough,” he muttered, the words somewhat more strained now. “Let’s see...if I can...make you do it for real…”

Each bit was punctuated by a deepening thrust against her, and Kagome had to bite her lip against the urge to do exactly as he said. The hand cupping her breast flexed, fingers finding her peaked nippled and tugging gently. Even the small contact sent a jolt straight through her and down to where they were connected, her body clenching tight around him.

Inuyasha groaned, the sound rumbling across her lips as he tilted his head up to capture them. His tongue curled against hers as if he could taste the small sounds escaping her, the arm around her waist tightening as he used his hold to drag her body down to meet each thrust. Kagome’s nails curled against the straining flesh of his shoulder, feeling the coil in her stomach begin to wind tight with every tug at her nipple and press of him deeper inside of her.

“Kagome,” he murmured against her lips. “Fuck. Kagome, Kagome. Shit, you feel...you feel so…”

“Please,” Kagome keened, scarcely aware of it as the words left her. “Please, Inuyasha! Yes, please, just like...just like-!”

Abruptly she tensed, the head of him grinding against something inside her that made her vision go white. Her back arched, every muscle in her body stretched taut with the force of her release.

Vaguely Kagome heard Inuyasha curse, felt him pant her name into the hollow between her neck and shoulder as he continued to move frantically inside of her. Her limbs began to quake at the continued friction, the sensation heightening her pleasure to a fever pitch.

After what could have been mere moments or an eternity to her addled mind, she felt his hips stutter in their almost bruising rhythm. He flexed hard against her, burying his length as deeply as he could as he reached his own release.

His body jerked in a few more stuttering thrusts as he spent himself inside her. Slowly he stilled against her, the only sound their labored breathing as each eased down from the height of their climax into the boneless contentment of the afterglow.

“...Missed you,” Inuyasha murmured into the flesh of her shoulder, so low she was not sure that she was meant to hear it.

Kagome’s eyes slid shut, the sentiment echoing in her more sharply than she would have expected. She had missed him. That was the feeling that had been hollowing out her chest, wrapping itself up in the guise of annoyance and frustration. She had missed the warmth of his skin against hers, had missed the way his ears twitched when she teased him, had missed the faint furrow between his dark brows that formed when he watched her while he thought she was unaware. She had missed having his focus fixed fully on her and the way he swore without censoring himself and the way he always made certain he was near enough to her that if he just stretched out the tips of his fingers they would brush against her.

All of which, she realized, was utterly foolish.

It was not as if they had truly been separated. They had scarcely been farther apart than the space of several walls the entire time. She had seen him in passing and spoken to him on occasion, albeit only in the brief, constrained manner necessitated by so many new eyes upon them.

And besides, these moments between them were numbered. They had been from the moment they had begun. They were transitory, beautiful, like pockets of sunshine in the depths of winter’s chill, something to be secreted away in the corners of her thoughts and to be brought out in private moments to be looked upon fondly. But she could no more hold them than she could grasp sunlight itself, and so what was the point in missing it? What was the point in clinging to something she would have to surrender as soon as they found a suitable choice?

“Kagome?” he said, voice losing some of its post-coital haziness. “Are you alright? Did I hurt-?”

“I missed you, too,” she said, bowing her head to rest it against his still-covered shoulder.

She said it because it was true and because pockets of warmth were necessary, even if they were fleeting.

* * *

Inuyasha was the one who figured it out.

It had been staring him right in the face, he told her after barging into her residence two days later. Kagome hurriedly begged the pardon of the women, asking a nearby servant to guide his Majesty to a sitting room and prepare something for him to eat. Due largely to the astonishment of the women, she was then able to slip away to join him.

He was certainly not using the sitting room for sitting. Rather he was pacing agitatedly back and forth, the servant eyeing him uncertainly as he placed several dishes down on the low table. Kagome thanked the man and waited for him to depart before addressing Inuyasha.

“What in the world has gotten into you?” she said, stepping in to block his path. 

“I figured it out,” he said. “The choice! I figured it out!”

“The-?” Kagome began, confused, and then, realization dawning, “Oh! Oh! What? What is it?”

“I was with the Council,” he said. “Bored out of my fucking skull while they droned on about silk distribution or some shit-”

He paused at Kagome’s chastening frown, shrugging.

“What? Even you’d be hard pressed to pay attention to most of that bullshit,” he said. “But I was sitting there, staring at the wrinkly-ass faces of all those old wrinkly-ass old men and I realized that they all looked exactly the same. All of them. And every Ministry branch is the same. Every fucking one. But what if they looked different? What if they were different?”

Kagome’s eyes widened, the meaning behind his words striking her almost with the force of a blow. 

“You mean…” she said, but could not gather enough words together to finish the thought.

Inuyasha nodded, a hint of pride curling up one corner of his mouth.

“But...is it...do you think they would even allow it to happen?” she said.

That curl smoothed out.

“No,” he said, some of the excitement going out of his words. “Not without a fight. There’s a certain number of seats in every branch. They only get filled when one of the geezers croaks and it’s usually by nomination of the other geezers who pick another geezer, though I could pick the new one if I needed to. Even if I did, though, they’d push back. ‘Sides, it would take forever to get them all in if we just waited around for people to die.”

“Morbid,” Kagome murmured, more to herself than to him. “Then what do you propose?”

“A new Ministry branch,” he said. “We can’t get them into one, then we create one for them.”

“You could do that?” Kagome said, struck again by both the idea and the thought behind it.

“I’m the Tennō, right?”

A disbelieving laugh escaped her.

“I suppose you are,” she said, and she could see the grin stretching across her face mirrored in his. “But what sort of branch will you create for them? How does one even go about doing so?”

He shrugged, his look largely unconcerned.

“Didn’t get that far,” he said. “I figured we’d do that part together, like the rest.”

Kagome could have kissed him. And so she did. 

“Together it is, then.”

* * *

It took a mere two days for them to cobble together a rough idea of what they wanted their new Ministry branch to look like.

They both excused themselves from their respective appointees, allowing them the time and freedom to visit their residences and families or to remain and explore the Dairi at their own leisure as they chose. Most of the appointees opted for the former over the latter, but either way it gave them the time and space that they needed to work.

After consulting a few texts from the records room in the Chūwain, they found that it was well within Inuyasha’s right as the Tennō to create or dissolve any Ministry branch as he saw fit so on that point at least there was no uncertainty. There was also, however, no recorded instance that they could find of a woman ever having been appointed to a position within any Ministry branch. There was also nothing they could find that explicitly forbade women from entering, either, which Kagome took as an encouraging sign.

Still, they both agreed after some discussion that a Ministry branch composed solely of women would ultimately be counter-productive to their aims. They did not want the branch to look like a mere anomaly, a thing designed apart from all of the other branches and subject to none of the same respect. If they ultimately wished for the women to be considered for any and all of the branches then this branch would have to be considered as an equal to the others and that meant bringing in the men, as well.

They would open the branch to any of the appointees who had a desire to enter. They would also keep it close, assign to it duties specifically within the Dairi both to allow them to retain their status as appointees and to give them the space needed to learn. Many of them, the women in particular, had not been allowed the same education as those who were groomed all their lives to go into the branches. They would need time and guidance in order to learn, to gain enough experience that no one could take exception should the time come for them to cross into another branch.

With the plan as fleshed out as it was going to be-a good deal of it, Kagome realized, would simply have to come with time and error-the time came at last to tell the appointees.

They summoned them all to the Shishinden just after the afternoon meal. Inuyasha sat atop the throne on the raised dais, Kagome on the cushion a few steps down on his left hand side. The appointees filed in in pairs, their looks ranging from curious to faintly nervous as they took their places atop the cushions that had been laid out for them. Katsumi in particular pinned Kagome with a wide-eyed look that she met with what she hoped was a reassuring nod.

“Thank you all for coming, cousins,” she said when the last of them had trickled in. “I know you must all be wondering why his Majesty and I have summoned you here, so we will not keep you long in suspense. Tennō-sama.”

She shifted enough where she sat to bow her head to Inuyasha, deferring to him. While he did not relish the prospect of being made to speak more than was strictly necessary, they had agreed beforehand that the news would be best delivered by him. He rose, eyeing the uncertain faces of the appointees below him.

“Like Kagome said, you’re probably all worried about why we called you here together, but you don’t need to be,” he said. “In the weeks since you came here we have both been watching you and trying to decide the best way to go forward. Before now, in the times of our fathers and mothers and grandmothers and grandfathers, it meant one thing for women to be appointees and another thing for men. But we’re not them and the things they wanted aren’t the things we want. Or maybe they are and they just never got the chance to ask for them.”

“Either way, we wanna give you all a chance to choose what this is going to look like for you. For all of you. So we’ve decided to create the Ministry of the Imperial Household.”

He paused at this, watching them for reactions. The looks that met his own were bemused at best. He frowned, looking to Kagome in askance.

“Cousins,” she took up for him. “What his Majesty is saying is that he has decided to create this new branch of the Ministry and to give a place in it to any here who wish one. The branch will be focused around maintaining and managing matters of the imperial household to allow you all to maintain your status as appointees and to remain here in the Dairi. We are also aware that many of you were not afforded the same advantages of those who might have been studying their whole lives to enter the Ministry, so we intend to make certain that you all will be allowed time and tutelage in order to learn. It is also our intention that through this branch you should all gain any of the experience necessary to move into any Ministry branch in the future, should you wish it.”

The bemusement was long gone by the time she finished speaking, replaced with wide-eyed silence. Kagome observed them, content to allow them as much time as they might need to process this.

“By ‘all of us’, do you mean…?”

The voice, scarcely more than a whisper, issued from Katsumi, seemingly without her consent. Her dark eyes were wide and unblinking as they met Kagome’s, hope and fear mingling there in almost equal measure. Kagome offered her a small smile.

“We mean all of you,” she said firmly. “Women and men. Any among you who wish to enter may enter. No one will be denied, but nor will any among you be forced if it is not something you wish. As the Tennō-sama said, all we want is to give you all a choice as we move forward.”

Tears had begun to leak from Katsumi’s eyes in silent streams and several of the appointees around her leaned in to offer their support, one man proffering a cloth from his pocket for her to use. The hand of one of the women trembled as she accepted the cloth on Katsumi’s behalf, handing it to her.

“But...how?” Hisana spoke up from the back of the group, her face faintly paler than its usual hue. “There was never...it was never…”

Inuyasha shrugged, looking vaguely discomfited by Katsumi’s tears.

“Just because it never was doesn’t mean it can’t be,” he said. “There was nothing that said that I couldn’t, so I did. And there will be people who don’t like it, people who don’t want it, but it was the same thing with me becoming Tennō. If you’re willing to fight, so am I.”

“I am,” said Katsumi hurriedly, voice thick with feeling.

“And I.”

“I am.”

“So am I.”

“I will.”

“As will I.”

The chorus of answers swelled through the room, filled it to brimming as women and men alike joined in. Some among them shed tears as Katsumi did, in the faces of others there was a faint fear, but beneath it all there was a burgeoning hope that found its voice in their cries that they would fight.

And thus the Ministry of the Imperial Household was born.

* * *

“I...brought this.”

Kanna proffered her mirror, the one that Kagome had first seen her carrying what now felt like a lifetime ago at her first women’s outing.

Kagome blinked, not at all certain what to make of the gesture. Tonight was Kanna’s night to play at handmaiden and Kagome had come into the evening with no idea of what to expect. She had scarcely exchanged more than a handful of words with the girl in all her time at court, including even in these past few weeks since she had come into the Dairi. Although that seemed to simply be the way that Kanna interacted with everyone, drifting blank-faced from place to place with no apparent interest in anyone or anything.

Which made this sudden shift even more difficult to comprehend.

“It’s...lovely,” Kagome said, at a loss for anything else to say. “Thank you for bringing it.”

Kanna made no response, but there was something like expectation in her dark eyes as she continued to stare unblinking up into Kagome’s face.

“He said...to bring it,” Kanna said after several beats of puzzled silence on Kagome’s end. “He said...that you were...lonely. That you...wanted to see your...friends.”

“He?” Kagome echoed, frowning faintly. “You don’t mean…?”

She trailed off, a memory from a few days before clicking suddenly into place. After the midday meal she had seen Inuyasha leaving accompanied by Kanna, the image striking her immediately as an odd one. She had dismissed it, though, as she and Inuyasha had been working since their announcement in the Shishinden to try and speak to each of the appointees in order to figure where they might best fit moving forward with the new branch. If he had somehow managed to find a way to communicate with Kanna when she had struggled to, then she was glad of it-even if it was difficult to imagine.

And of course it must have been him. Who else knew enough of her to tell something like that to Kanna?

But to what end?

“Do you mean...the Tennō-sama asked you to show me my friends? How?”

“Think...of them,” Kanna said softly. “Only them. Think hard. Look...into...the mirror. I can...find them. You can...see them. Speak to...them.”

She held the mirror aloft once more, bringing it almost to Kagome’s eye level. Kagome glanced from it to her and back again, still not entirely certain what to make of all this. Still, if Inuyasha had sent her then surely there could be no harm in it. And if there was even a chance that she might be able to see her friends…

Peering into the mirror, Kagome tried to focus her thoughts on her friends. In her mind’s eye she could see them, could feel their arms around her as she had in those moments before they had last parted. She could hear Shippou’s laughter and feel Sango’s warmth at her side and see Miroku’s easy grin. And she wanted to see them so badly that the longing was almost a physical ache in her chest.

Youki crept like goosebumps across her sixth sense and the mirror went dark. From the darkness an image slowly emerged.

The light of a few dying embers cast deep shadows across a face so dear to Kagome that for a moment she felt as though she could not catch her breath. The angle was disorienting, the view fixed somewhere a distance below Sango’s chin and reflecting upwards, but still Kagome could scarcely have been happier had she found herself standing face to face with the woman.

Even in the dim light, though, it was not difficult to see that Sango was far from sharing in her happiness. Her dark eyes were unfocused and her skin was a shade beyond its usual delicate pale, even the warmth of the nearby fire failing to lend any color to her cheeks. Dark smudges sat heavy beneath her eyes as if it had been days since she had last slept and a few streaks of dirt even lingered here and there across the normally pristine woman’s face.

The woman who had treated her as a sister almost since they had first met looked as though she had been hollowed out by exhaustion and suffering and Kagome wanted nothing more than to reach out and wrap her arms around her.

“The wards are up and Shippou-kun seems to have fallen asleep.”

With the limited view that the mirror allowed Kagome could not see the owner of the voice, but she would have known it anywhere. Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes as Miroku came near enough to be touched by the light of the embers, scarcely more than a towering outline against the darkness of the surrounding night but still a precious sight.

The outline of him hunched down and she heard the hollow sound of wood on wood followed by a few loud pops. Based on the few sparks that were sent spinning through the air, she guessed he must be feeding the dying fire. The lick of a flame’s light that danced across Sango’s face a few moments later proved her guess correct.

“If you are finished polishing your wakizashi, I caught a rabbit while I was putting up the wards that I would be happy to cook for us, Sango-sama,” came Miroku’s voice once more, a tentative note there that was unusual for him.

Sango blinked as if she had only just realized that she was not alone. The flames danced in her eyes as she lifted them to Miroku, seeming to struggle for a moment to process what he had just said.

“No thank you, Houshi-sama,” she said softly at last. “I am not hungry.”

There was a beat of fraught silence.

“Sango-sama, you haven’t eaten anything today,” Miroku said. “You need to keep up your strength.”

Sango’s gaze fell.

“For what?” she murmured, the words barely rising above the crackling of the flames. “It’s been over a month that we have been at this, Miroku. If Kohaku wanted to be caught, we would have caught him by now. Clearly he has no desire to see me.”

There was a faint rustling as Miroku moved, shifting into Kagome’s view. He was close enough to reach out and touch Sango, though he did not.

“Sango,” he said, the word demanding her attention. “We’ve no way of knowing what Kohaku wants right now. As Kagome-sama said, he’s not in his right mind.”

Sango bit her lip, the words clearly of little comfort to her. There was a sheen creeping across her eyes brighter than that of the firelight and she shook her head hard.

“And what does that say of me?” she said. “What does it say of me that I stood beside my younger brother for days, perhaps for weeks, and saw nothing of his suffering? What does it say of me that I allowed him in his suffering to attack, nearly to kill, one of my dearest friends? What does any of it say of me save that I am not fit to be here, that I’ve no chance of saving my brother now when I could not save him before?”

The tears fell in earnest now, rolling thick and hot down her cheeks. A few dripped from her chin, splattering across the surface of Kagome’s mirror and obstructing her view of the two somewhat. Her wakizashi, Kagome realized suddenly. Sango must be holding it in her lap and Kanna must need a reflective surface in order for her power to work.

Thankfully she was still able to see it as Miroku reached out, his gloved hand coming to rest over one of Sango’s. Sango glanced up, obviously as surprised at the gesture as Kagome was. While Miroku was hardly conservative when it came to touching most people, he had largely avoided almost any physical contact with Sango since her failed confession to him. 

“All that any of this says of you, Sango, is that you are exhausted,” he said, meeting her eyes firmly. “It says that, as you yourself have said, you’ve now spent over a month’s time giving everything you have to find your brother, despite what he was forced to do to your friend. It says that you dismissed your fellow clansmen from the search in order to be able to move even more quickly and that still every time that we have managed to catch up with Kohaku, he has somehow managed to evade us. It says that you have hardly slept or eaten in days and it is finally beginning to wear on you. It says nothing more and nothing less than that you are human, and one of the strongest ones that I know.”

Kagome could see Sango’s throat working as she swallowed hard, a fresh wash of tears spilling down her cheeks. A faint tremble went through her, the mirror itself seeming to shake as the wakizashi shifted in her lap.

“I’m exhausted, Miroku,” she said, her voice breaking around the words. “I’m so exhausted, but I am terrified that if I stop for even a moment then that will be the moment when I lose Kohaku for good. That we will lose him and any hope of catching the youkai who killed your father. I do not know how I would live with myself were I to fail the both of you so terribly.”

Miroku tensed at the mention of his father, his eyes flitting briefly to the rosary wrapped around the hand that held Sango’s. Still he offered her a gentle smile, clutching her hand more tightly.

“You need not fear disappointing me,” he said. “You could not even should you try to. And if you are exhausted then lean on me. I can carry the weight until you are ready to walk again. The kami know that you have done it often enough for me.”

Sango’s eyes widened, flames dancing in their depths as they fixed on his face. Miroku met her look. A tremulous smile crept slowly across her face, accompanied by several more tears.

“Thank you,” she said softly. “I’ll confess that despite it all I’ve still managed to find time to worry that I had lost my dearest friend to my own stupidity. I see now that he is still beside me.”

Miroku’s smile dimmed somewhat.

“I am,” he said softly. “Though I have done little of late to earn the title. The way I spoke to you that day, Sango-”

“Stop,” she cut across him. “You need make no apologies for that day. I-I misunderstood you, but it’s not a mistake I will ever make again. If I can have you at my side as my friend, then there is nothing more that I can ask for. I need you with me, now more than perhaps I ever have.”

Kagome could see the line of Miroku’s shoulders grow taut. Shadows played across his face, deepening the furrow of his brow and the lines around his mouth. She could see the controlled press of his lips together, but could only guess at the words he held so tightly behind them. Whatever it was, it hurt her almost as much to witness the silent struggle as she was sure it hurt for him to wage it.

But Sango’s eyes were wide, hopeful, seeking as they roved his face. Tears still clung wetly to her lashes, glimmering there like stars, and despite the dirt streaking her face and the red rimming her eyes Kagome still thought her one of the most striking people she had ever seen.

And suddenly Miroku was leaning forward, his hand tightening around Sango’s. His eyes were fixed on her face as if in a trance, finally falling to settle on her lips. Sango seemed to freeze, her eyes impossibly wide as she watched his approach.

A faint clacking echoed between them, the sound of the beads of Miroku’s rosary knocking together. He froze, the spell broken as his gaze was forced to his gloved hand. All the color seemed to drain from his face in an instant, his face twisting as he levered himself hurriedly back and away from Sango.

Sango blinked, color rising rapidly to her cheeks as confusion and something painfully near to disappointment warred in her expression. Miroku could not meet her gaze, slowly uncurling his hand from around hers and pulling it away with no small amount of effort.

There were several beats of silence that seemed to stretch on for an eternity, Miroku’s jaw clenched tight against the force of some feeling. At last, though, he was able to lift his gaze, a shadow obscuring his face for a moment before sliding away to reveal his usual blithe smile.

“My apologies, Sango-sama,” he said, a faint strain just beneath the words. “I thought I saw something on your face. I was mistaken.”

Disappointment flickered across Sango’s face, though she tucked it away as quickly as she could manage. 

“It’s alright,” she said. “Perhaps we are both more tired than we thought.”

The blithe smile faltered momentarily.

“Perhaps,” he said.

He rose, clapping his hands together with forced cheer. The rosary beads echoed loudly once more.

“I think food would do us both well,” he said. “I will start preparing the rabbit.”

“Oh,” said Sango. “Yes. Of course. Thank you, Houshi-sama.”

He turned to go, but paused before he had made it a step.

“Sango-sama?”

“Yes?”

“...if you need it, I will walk at your side until my end. Please know that.”

And then he was gone, disappearing into the darkness just beyond the circle of firelight.

Several more tears splattered across the face of the mirror, obscuring Kagome’s view of her friend. Slowly she picked up her wakizashi and Kagome caught one last glimpse of her tear-stained face before she sheathed it, plunging her into darkness.

Kagome stared into the darkened mirror for several long moments, scarcely able to process what she had just seen. 

“...crying?”

The soft voice startled her, bringing her abruptly back to herself. Kagome realized simultaneously that she was crying, tears streaming steadily down her cheeks, and that Kanna was still there. Which, of course she was, but she had been so overwhelmed with seeing her friends and what she had seen that she had completely forgotten all else.

“Your friends...are hurt?” Kanna said, the words barely rising above a whisper.

“No,” Kagome said, swiping at her eyes hastily. “Well, yes. But no.”

Kanna cocked her head slightly, though her snow-pale face was as devoid of expression as ever.

“You did not...speak,” she said.

“I…”

Kagome trailed off, realizing that she was not quite certain why she had not spoken. She had meant to, had wanted to. So what had sealed her lips?

Certainly she had had no desire to interrupt the fraught moment that had passed between them. Truly she should have turned away as soon as she had realized what was happening, but she had felt the same hope that she had seen flash through Sango’s eyes bubbling up in her chest and she had been helpless to look away. All for nothing, though. For all the pain that it caused him, it seemed Miroku would not be swayed from his resolve.

But even before the moment had stolen her voice she had still said nothing. Because what could she say to them? While she could now give a name to their shared foe, it was not as though she was much closer to finding a way to stop him. And it seemed that they still had not been able to catch Kohaku, who she had been a mere hair’s breadth away from and who she had let slip away. What right did she have to say anything to them right now?

“This was enough for now,” she settled on at last. “Seeing that they are alright. It was enough.”

Kanna’s expression did not shift, but Kagome could have sworn there was something like sadness reflected in her dark eyes.

Kagome offered her a small smile, grateful for the small show of sympathy.

“Thank you, Kanna-sama,” she said. “For allowing me to see them. It means more to me than you can know.”

Kanna blinked slowly, the words appearing foreign to her. After a moment she gave a small nod.

Kagome’s smile widened slightly. She was still a far cry from being able to understand the girl, but she knew a good heart when she saw one.

* * *

The summons to Inuyasha’s chambers that came a few days later was a welcome one. Kagome had had little opportunity to speak to the hanyou in the past few days and she had things she desperately needed to get off of her chest.

But as she pushed past the entryway hanging and caught sight of him, words were not the first thing that came to mind. She found herself striding towards him, what felt like scarcely two steps eating up the distance to his side as he rose to meet her.

She had a moment to observe the almost comical look of surprise on his face, golden eyes going wide as she took his face between her hands and pulled it down to meet hers. His lips were a bit stiff against her own, but the surge of gratitude and affection she felt at the sight of him was so strong that there was little room left for anything else.

After a moment he relaxed and she felt his arms go around her and his lips respond to the insistent press of hers. And he was warm and solid and so, so kind even though he would never admit to it, would scoff at her if she even dared to say it, she could at least do this.

But suddenly this was lips and teeth and tongues and she was being pressed down, being laid out amongst the scattered cushions at their feet. The warmth of his lips crept along her skin, filling her with a faint ache that whispered to her to just lay back and surrender to it.

Sadly, though, there was no time for this. Truly, this time. They had scarcely enough time to discuss...whatever it was that he had summoned her here to discuss before the women would be expecting her again for the afternoon meal. They could not afford for someone to come seeking her only to find them like this.

Still she allowed it to go on for a few moments longer than she should have before reluctantly disentangling herself. Inuyasha made as if to pursue, his eyes hooded, and she had to force herself to press a restraining hand to his chest.

“Wait,” she murmured.

Inuyasha blinked, some of the haze clearing from his eyes. He pulled back enough to search her face, concern edging his expression.

“Sorry,” he said. “I didn't mean...are you alright?”

Kagome nodded hurriedly.

“No, no,” she said. “It’s alright. It was me...I-I just wanted to thank you.”

Inuyasha’s brow furrowed.

“Thank…?” 

He cut himself off, realization dawning.

“You saw them?” he said.

Kagome nodded, a smile lighting her face.

“I did,” she said. “They are...not well, but alright. Tired, perhaps, but whole and uninjured. Still following Kohaku-sama’s trail. But at least I know now that they are safe and that I can look in on them again when I want to. Thanks to you. You said you would find a way for me to see them, and you did.”

Inuyasha blinked, his face reddening. Kagome had to bite back a laugh, amused by the fact that it was a compliment flustering him while he was at the same moment pressed against her chest to hip.

“Keh.”

“I am serious, Inuyasha,” Kagome pressed on, refusing to be brushed off. “It...it might seem nothing to you, but it meant a great deal to me.”

“It ain’t nothing. I know that.”

Kagome offered him a small smile which he reddened further under, his gaze sliding away from hers.

“How in the world did you get Kanna-sama to agree to it, though?”

Inuyasha shrugged, the gesture made slightly awkward by their position.

“I heard Kagura talking to her about the mirror,” he said. “And I thought...I don’t know. I just talked to her. She doesn’t talk much, so people don’t talk to her a lot. I get it. I didn’t talk much when I was a brat either, so people didn’t talk to me.”

Silently Kagome marveled at this. Somehow Inuyasha continued to surprise her despite everything.

“That was good of you,” she said softly.

Inuyasha shrugged once more, but this time his gaze lingered on her face. She found herself holding her breath, conscious once more of how close he still was. She wondered if he would lean in that last little bit…

Thankfully he seemed to have a bit more self-control than she did at the moment, pushing up and away from her until he could sit up. He offered a hand, pulling her up until she could sit, as well. She swallowed a small twinge of disappointment, sweeping her hands over her robes to straighten them out. 

“What-what was it that you needed?” she said, struggling to regain some sense of her equilibrium.

Inuyasha frowned, hesitating.

“...I talked to Hobo,” he said at last, the words heavy with reluctance.

“Hobo?” Kagome echoed, frowning.

His frown edged into a scowl. 

“Hobo,” he repeated. “The guard. The one that’s always drooling over you.”

“Oh,” she said, eyes widening. “You mean Akitoki-sama? And he does not drool over-”

She cut herself off at Inuyasha’s sharp look, both of them only too aware that any denial of the guard’s feelings would be a falsehood. She shook her head.

“Anyway, his feelings are no concern of mine until he chooses to make them so,” she said.

Inuyasha quirked a dark brow, his look darkening.

“And when he does?” he challenged. “Then what?”

Kagome shrugged, her gaze sliding to the tatami beneath them.

“That’s a problem for another day,” she said.

Ungraciously she hoped that that day would never come. She had no desire to experience what she had with Kouga over again with the guardsman.

Inuyasha’s expression did not lighten and the tightness of his jaw told Kagome he would press the issue if he was not redirected quickly.

“What did the two of you discuss?” she said quickly. “Surely nothing so mundane as all this.”

Inuyasha’s scowl deepened for a moment before he seemed to relent.

“Demoralizing an enemy,” he said flatly.

Kagome’s brows rose.

“What?”

The scowl returned.

“He was babbling about you,” he spat. “Asking how you were and what you like and what I-what I thought about you. And I thought about just hitting him to get him to shut up for once, but you said that ain’t an option if it wasn’t a fight. So I asked him about fighting. And like always the idiot went on and on until I thought my ears might start bleeding, but then he finally said something worth listening to.”

Kagome found herself nearly gaping at him, wondering which part of the mess that had just come out of his mouth that she should address first. After a moment she simply shook her head, deciding that anything she might choose would end in a fight that they did not have time for.

“And what was that?” she said.

“He talked about battles he’d read about,” he said. “How he’d studied records on battles from years ago. And a lot of it was bullshit, but then he said something that made sense. He said that demoralizing the enemy is the best way to keep them from attacking or to get the upper hand.”

He gave her a meaningful look that she did her best to return, but after a moment she had to shake her head a bit sheepishly as she failed to comprehend his meaning. 

“The ships,” he said with faint exasperation. “We need to demoralize the ships. At worst we buy ourselves time, at best they decide that whatever Menōmaru’s paying them ain’t worth it.”

Kagome’s eyes widened. The distraction of the appointments had kept her from dwelling too much on thoughts of the ships, but the worry was one that always hummed softly in the back of her mind. She frowned, though. While the concept was an interesting one, it was hardly a plan of any sort.

“But how?” she said.

“The scale,” he said, leaning towards her. “You still have it, right?”

“Of course,” Kagome said. “But the ningyō-”

“They won’t risk their own asses,” Inuyasha broke in. “Not for us or anyone that ain’t them. I get it. But this won’t be a risk. They go in at night only and focus on a few ships. Take down as many as they can before they’re seen, then they get out. They keep an eye on them and let us know if they’re getting ready to come at us. I know it ain’t much, but it might be enough to keep the wakō off our asses until we can work out a real plan.”

Kagome searched his face, considering this. Whatever angle she looked at it from, it seemed sound enough. There was little ground for the ningyō to object on as there was little risk to them if they were careful. He was right in that it was a temporary deterrent at best, but it was at least a step in the right direction. The wakō would be confused, struggling against an enemy that they could not see. With any luck they would be made cautious, their advance checked by fear of repercussions from an unknown foe. And their hesitation might give them the time to come up with a more permanent solution.

She nodded.

“It’s good,” she said. “It could work.”

The corner of his lips quirked up, some small amount of pride creeping in. 

“Tonight, then,” he said. “Sneak out and meet me on the water walkway to my chambers.”

Hope leapt like an ember rising in her chest. Kagome nodded.

* * *

That night proved that sneaking was no more Kagome’s strong suit than it was Inuyasha’s. Although, she lamented, there were certain circumstances in this instance that were beyond her control.

Inuyasha eyed her companion, mistrust writ deep across his features. Her companion met his look, unmoved.

Kagome pressed a hand to her head, feeling a faint headache coming on. 

She had thought her handmaiden for the night was well and truly asleep by the time that she attempted to sneak out, but she should have known better than to rest on any assumption when it came to Kagura.

The youkai had caught her just as she was slipping out through the shoji, inquiring in a manner that brooked no dissemblance as to where she intended to go under the cover of darkness. Kagome had frozen, pinned in place by a level blood-red gaze.

The implications were clear. If she refused to answer then it would be tantamount to an admission that she was involved in some kind of deception. Despite their tentative truce she was well aware that neither of them trusted one another fully, but Kagome understood that ultimately Kagura had no desire greater than that of freeing herself from Naraku’s hold once and for all. Thus her decision was made.

And thus she found herself between Inuyasha and Kagura, lamenting silently that she should have just remained in her futon. 

“What is she doing here, Kagome?”

“Your miko invited me,” Kagura replied coolly, ignoring his address. “We are allies, are we not, Tennō-sama?”

Inuyasha spared her a sharp look before his gaze turned to Kagome. She shrugged, a helpless gesture.

“Kagura-sama is our ally, is she not?” she said, hoping he would understand her.

The three of them did share a common enemy. While she was far from being able to trust Kagura in full, she was confident at least in the woman’s self-interest. 

“If this is, as I suspect, to do with Naraku, you would do well to keep me informed,” Kagura said. “As I thought that I had already made clear, you’ve little hope of accomplishing much against him without my aid.”

Though Inuyasha’s look did not soften, a grudging acquiescence edged into it. Kagome met his look with a nod.

“I can understand your wariness, but Kagura-sama does have a point,” she said.

Ideally they might have shared their plans with her a bit further down the line and in a far more controlled manner, but there was little help for it now.

Inuyasha’s jaw clenched around a denial. His gaze slid back to Kagura, eyeing her for a long moment before he huffed out a sigh.

“Fine,” he said. “You know about the ships?”

Kagura arched a dark brow.

“I had heard whispers,” she returned. “But Naraku is as cautious as he is cruel. I suspect he is the only one who ever knows the totality of his plans. The rest of us are never given more than pieces, no more than is necessary to carry out his orders.”

Inuyasha and Kagome traded a look. After a moment she nodded, silently conceding that this made sense.

“We believe that he’s baited one of the former Tennō-sama’s enemies,” she said. “Someone who wants to help take advantage of the unrest that he has been fostering within the court. And that person in turn has hired the wakō to do his dirty work. We believe that he is waiting for word from Naraku to press the attack, but we hope to preempt any fighting on our shores if possible.”

Kagura’s lips pressed into a thin line, her gaze hooded.

“It would be like him to know how to play on the fears of those in power to his own benefit,” she said grimly. “But how did you come by this knowledge?”

Glancing at Kagome, Inuyasha cocked a dark brow. Kagome hesitated a moment before shrugging.

“I...saved a turtle?”

Kagura’s eyes widened briefly before narrowing once more. She sighed.

“That does sound like the sort of lunacy that you would be involved in,” she said. “So, then, I suppose the two of you have concocted some sort of grand plan to prevent this from happening?”

Kagome shrugged once more.

“It is far from grand,” she said. “And likewise far from preventing it. We at least hope to delay it, though, and to buy ourselves some time to work out the rest.”

Kagura considered this before nodding, no more than a slight inclination of her head.

“I suppose that is well enough for now,” she said.

Kagome traded another look with Inuyasha, a question in both of their faces. There was something there, some unspoken word simmering just beneath the surface of what Kagura allowed them to hear. She had never made any secret of the fact that she had plans and interests all her own, but it was difficult not to be wary of that when she was taking so much care to make certain that she knew every move of theirs.

“You do not trust me,” Kagura said, her words cutting across their silent communication. “And in that you do well. We are allies of convenience, and should our alliance become inconvenient I would not hesitate to sever it.That is not yet the case, however, and so my vow that Naraku will know nothing of any of this continues to hold.”

“Fine,” Inuyasha said, unconsciously shifting so that Kagome was partially behind him. “But if you even look like you might-”

Kagura rolled her eyes.

“Save your threats, Tennō-sama,” she said. “For I can assure you that whatever they might be, I have heard far worse. Your miko is safe from me. Be content with as much.”

Kagome placed a gentle, restraining hand on his shoulder when it looked as if he might press the issue. He darted a glance at her, his look still sharp.

“Please leave it be, Tennō-sama,” she said. “Kagura-sama is right. We all know as much as we can of where we stand right now. There’s no help for it but to do what we intend to.”

Inuyasha’s lips curled downwards, a clear sign of his dissatisfaction. He said nothing, though, and that was as much as she could hope for at the moment. Reaching into her robes, Kagome pulled forth the scale that ningyō had given her. Kagura’s gaze fixed upon it, her eyes widening faintly.

“Oh,” she said, so softly that Kagome almost did not catch it.

Kagome moved toward the water walkway, Inuyasha dogging her heels and shooting Kagura a warning look. The youkai woman was unfazed, following behind them to observe Kagome.

Holding the scale cupped between both hands, Kagome hesitated. The ningyō had not exactly given her instructions on how to summon them back, merely giving her the scale and telling her that she could. Still, if she had not bothered to explain then it could not possibly be too complex a matter, right?

Closing her eyes, Kagome focused on the feel of the scale in her hands and fixed the image of the ningyō in her mind. The scale grew warm against her skin and instinctively she opened her hands, tossing it gently into the water.

It floated gently downward, landing petal-light on the surface of the water. Upon contact the color of the scale began to lighten, brightening to a radiant golden hue that spread out in ripples across the face of the pool. 

From the center of the ripples emerged a dark head of slick, ink-black hair. Eyes broke the surface next, round and dark as a new moon and followed by an unsmiling mouth filled with small, sharp teeth. Kagome recognized her instantly as the same girl who had visited her the first time.

“You called?” she said, her tone as devoid of emotion as it had been the last time.

Kagome nodded, squatting down beneath the level of the railing to bring herself closer to the ningyō’s eyeline.

“I did,” she said. “Thank you for coming...uh, I am afraid I do not know your name. May I ask it?”

The ningyō cocked her hand faintly to one side as if the question struck her as odd. She blinked once slowly and Kagome caught the quick sheen of a second, transparent eyelid sliding over her eyes.

“It would be difficult to pronounce above water,” she said. “Bubbles are needed.”

“Oh,” Kagome said, slightly thrown by this. “I could...try, if you like?”

Behind her she heard a simultaneous snort from Inuyasha and scoff from Kagura. She felt her cheeks pink faintly, mentally glaring at the both of them.

“You may call me Chōseki if you like,” the ningyō said, unperturbed. “I have always enjoyed the sound of it on the lips of sailors and fishermen, and you will not drown in the attempt.”

“Chōseki-sama it is, then,” Kagome said. “Thank you for coming. I believe I have at last figured out the favor that I wish to ask of you.”

Chōseki inclined her head faintly, but said nothing.

“The ship’s flag that you gave me,” Kagome continued. “I think I understand now what it means for us and we need your help in order to divert what could prove a disaster for us if left unchecked. I understand that there are limits to what you are willing to do and above all I have no wish to place any of you in harm’s way, but I hope that we have worked out a way that you can aid us with little danger to yourselves.”

Kagome took a breath, glancing back at Inuyasha. He nodded, sinking down to squat at her side.

“The plan would be that you attack only at night,” he said. “Only when it’s dark, only some of them, and nothing major. Piercing holes in the hulls, sinking a few if you can, stealing any of their catches or supplies you can get your hands on. You’d never let them see you and you’d never let them know it was you.”

Chōseki eyed him, her gaze sharpening somewhat.

“The wakō are children of the sea almost as much as we are,” she said. “They will not be long in figuring us out, and they will not be kind should they catch us.”

Inuyasha inclined his head, silently conceding this. 

“But they’re human,” he countered. “Maybe they know the sea and maybe they’ll think it’s you, but they’ll never be able to move as fast as you in the water. As long as you play it smart, the chance of them catching any of you is small. Besides, you all have your own score to settle with the wakō, right?”

Kagome glanced at him, faintly surprised. If there was some sort of grudge between the ningyō and the wakō, it was nothing that she was aware of.

Chōseki cocked her head faintly to one side, doleful, dark eyes catching the light of the moon as she considered him.

“They have hunted us,” she said softly. “Murdered us and sold our flesh to others humans who dreamed of living forever. They are not the only ones.”

“But they’re some of the worst, right?” Inuyasha countered. “My old man was the one who banned it in his lands and waters. Might not’ve stopped it, but he at least tried to slow it down.”

Inwardly Kagome marveled at the obvious thought he had given to this argument. She was far more accustomed to seeing Inuyasha try to barrel through conversations with sheer force and little tact. But she supposed he was changing as much as anyone else. The thought inspired a strange mix of pride and uneasiness in her.

“That is true,” Chōseki said, pulling her from that line of thought. “Your father counted us among his own and did what he could to protect us. For all of that, we will not be subject to the rules of this land or any other. We are not of it.”

Inuyasha shook his head.

“This ain’t about that,” he said. “Subject or whatever, no one deserves what they did to you. If the Tennō should be anything, it should be a protector for anyone who needs it. I don’t care what laws you wanna follow, I want to protect you the same way my old man did. But I need your help first. And you said you owed one to Kagome, so this is it. This is what we’re asking. Take it or leave it, but know that we need your help now.”

Chōseki’s gaze swept from his face to hers, a question there.

“The Tennō-sama speaks for both of us,” Kagome said. “This is the boon I would ask of you.”

The ningyō was silent, her expression as still and smooth as quiet waters. Beneath the surface of the water Kagome caught the flash of the golden scales of her tail as it undulated in a rapid rhythm. 

“I am inclined to grant this to you,” she said at last. “But this is not wholly mine to give, miko. I must ask the others, as they must also risk themselves. I will bring the question of it to them. I will return when I have an answer for you.”

Her hand emerged from the water, curling open to reveal another golden scale. She held it out to Kagome.

“Take it,” she said. “When it is time I will use it to call you. If it cannot be done, it will be proof of another boon owed.”

Nodding, Kagome took the scale from her.

“Thank you for hearing us out, Chōseki-sama,” she said.

Chōseki nodded, but her gaze shifted to Inuyasha.

“I only saw him once and briefly, but you look like your father,” she said.

Before the hanyou could react to her words, she was gone in the arch of a tail and the flash of golden scales.

Silence fell over the three in which Kagome quickly realized that her thighs were burning from sustaining the squat for far too long. Tucking the scale away into her robes, she reached up and took hold of the wooden railing to hoist herself back onto her feet. Inwardly she winced at the protesting of her muscles, watching with faint envy as Inuyasha rose beside her with seeming ease.

“I suppose that went as well as we could have hoped,” she said. “Now we must wait to see what comes of it.”

“Perhaps not,” Kagura said, her look thoughtful.

She twisted her fan slowly between her hands, sliding it slowly open and closed as their gazes turned to her. 

“What d’you mean?” Inuyasha said, a warning edge to the words.

“Simply that we continue to press what little advantage we have against Naraku,” she said as lightly as if she were discussing the weather. “I believe that with a bit of artfully applied pressure we have a chance at forcing his hand, or at least of forcing him to give up some more of his secrets.”

“What sort of pressure did you have in mind?” Kagome said, a finger of unease sliding the length of her spine.

“We need to show him what he wants,” Kagura said. “Let him feel that he has won. Only then will he begin to let his guard slip.”

“So what is it you want from us?” Inuyasha said bluntly, suspicion writ deep in the furrow of his brow.

Kagura leveled him with a sharp look, the corner of her lips curling in distaste at his manner.

“And here I thought that you might have finally grown some tact after managing to charm Kanna,” she said, sliding her fan open in front of her mouth with a snap. “It seems, though, that there is no teaching an old dog new tricks. Still, I will thank you for your part in that. My sister can be quite intractable in her way, but she seems to have taken a liking to you...for reasons beyond my comprehension.”

Inuyasha’s scowl deepened.

“It wasn’t for you,” he said. 

Kagura’s brows rose, her gaze sliding to Kagome.

“Of that I am well aware,” she said archly. “Still, whatever your reasons, it serves my purpose as well as I imagine it serves yours. Kanna can help us to show him some of what we wish him to see. He will trust his eyes, if nothing else. Byakuya will do the rest if we make certain that he sees what we need him to. Between the two of my siblings and my accounts, Naraku should have no cause to believe anything save what we tell him and what you show him.”

“And what would you have us show him?” Kagome said, that same uneasy feeling still sitting deep in her gut.

Kagura’s crimson lips curved into a grin that gleamed like freshly spilled blood.

“Your downfall,” she said.

* * *

Kagome could only surmise that Hisana had no idea that she could see her expression reflected in the small mirror before her. Otherwise, she supposed, the older woman might have taken a little more care to disguise naked interest on display there as she eyed her.

Struggling against the urge to squirm beneath that probing gaze, Kagome wondered what in the world she could be searching for so intently in the back of her head or the line of her profile. It was Hisana’s night to play handmaiden to her and thus far the two of them had gotten on quite well, chatting animatedly about the progress that had been made so far on the new Ministry branch and the Tennō’s part in it. At this, though, Hisana had paused, something shifting in her face. She had grown first silent, then pensive, and now this.

“The Tennō-sama,” she said, her voice so sudden and decisive that Kagome almost startled. ”What are your thoughts on his Majesty?”

“My...thoughts?” Kagome said when she was able to gather enough of them to form a response. “Well...I think his Majesty a strong leader. Strong-willed, but willing to hear his people and-”

“No,” Hisana said, shaking her head. “I mean, that is all well and good when addressing the court, O-Miko-sama, but it is not what I mean. What do you think of the Tennō-sama? Not as a leader, but as a man.”

“A man?” Kagome echoed dumbly. “I don’t...I do not…”

“Do not what?” Hisana said, one brow arching as she dropped both the section of Kagome’s hair that she had been working at and all pretense. “Think of his Majesty as a man? Somehow that was not the impression I got at this afternoon’s meal.”

  
Kagome frowned, her mind reeling back to that afternoon’s meal. Nothing of any particular import had happened at the meal as she recalled it, and certainly nothing to indicate any sort of impropriety between herself and Inuyasha. The meal itself had been good, the conversation between the men and women had flowed easily, and then she had said her farewells-

“Oh, you need not fret,” said Hisana as if she could read the line of her thoughts. “It was merely an observation, just some small thing on my part. As you said your farewells, his Majesty’s hand reached for yours and you made as if to pull back. You did not and he did not, but the glimpse of it struck me. From the little I have been allowed to observe, his Majesty is not a man to seek out contact with others. Rather, the Tennō-sama seems to avoid it whenever he can.”

“Now you, on the other hand, O-Miko-sama, are all openness and touch, but not with his Majesty. With him you shy away, you avert your eyes and tuck away your hands. Again, merely small observations on my part, but they have led me to a question I cannot seem to shake: what do you think of the Tennō-sama?”

Kagome’s mouth worked soundlessly as she attempted to form a response to this past the mild panic buzzing through her. She did not know Hisana well by any means, but she knew that she was of Sango’s clan and that Sango trusted her. Certainly there did not seem to be any malice hidden within her questions, merely curiosity and a keen eye for observation. But why? Why turn that sharp gaze on herself and Inuyasha?

Shifting, Kagome turned to face the older woman fully.

“You have been watching us,” she said, her eyes searching the other woman’s.

Hisana inclined her head, not a hint of sheepishness in the admission. Her ochre eyes were warm as they met Kagome’s.

“It has been some time since my last mission, but the training bred into the taiji-ya of my clan from birth is not easily forgotten,” she said. “And a taiji-ya who cannot quickly take in and assess their surroundings is often a dead one, so yes, I have been watching you, though I assure you with no ill intent to it. It was difficult not to after the way that the spring ceremony was arranged.”

The last was spoke with a knowing look, a quirk to the corner of Hisana’s lips that spoke of some sort of shared secret. Kagome frowned. 

“Arranged?” she echoed. “Was...was there something strange in the ceremony?”

None of the other women had mentioned anything and Kagome had been under the impression that the ceremony had gone off largely without a hitch. Had she missed something? Had there been some secret sentiment floating around that the appointees had not wished to tell her about?

By degrees the warm amusement in Hisana’s expression slipped away until her frown almost matched Kagome’s. Her head tilted faintly to one side, her eyes skimming the lines of Kagome’s face several times as if there were a story written there that she might somehow decipher. After several moments her mouth fell open slightly, her eyes rounding.

“Oh,” she said softly. “Oh. I see. That is it, then. It is him…”

Her brows knit together, her gaze sharpening as she raised it back to Kagome’s face.

“But then the initial question must still stand,” she said firmly. “What do you think of his Majesty as a man?”

“I…”

Kagome floundered, thrown by both the question and the rapidity of the noblewoman’s shift. She was missing something or had missed something, that much was certain, but it was difficult beneath the weight of Hisana’s pressing gaze to do more than respond.

“I think his Majesty a good man,” she found herself saying, for lack of anything else to say.

Hisana’s look did not ease.

“A good man?” she repeated, her eyes once more roving the planes of Kagome’s face as if she could read some deep secret there

And suddenly Kagome has the mortifying suspicion that she could. She willed her expression to remain neutral even as she felt a flush creeping inexorably up her throat and into her cheeks.

Hisana smiled. 

“A good man it is, then.”

* * *

In the days following her conversation with Hisana something curious happened.

It was almost imperceptible at first, just a miniscule shift in the way that some of the women addressed her. Their bows were a fraction deeper than they had been before and their tones more deferential. But these were such small things that it was easy enough for Kagome to dismiss them.

It was not until the manner of all the women- save Kagura and Kanna who remained largely as they ever were- changed that Kagome was forced to wonder what was happening. When the women gathered in the En no Matsubara for an afternoon meal amidst the roots of the Goshinboku, Kagome decided to broach the subject with Katsumi.

At her question, Katsumi smiled in a way she had never seen her do when she had first entered the Dairi.

“Well,” she said, her smile never fading as her dark gaze traced the twining branches of the Goshinboku overhead. “I imagine it must be different for each of us, but for me it is rather simple. I wish to return the favor.”

The dappled light that filtered through the branches overhead cast dancing shadows across her fine features, making it almost impossible to read her expression. Her eyes were warm as they met Kagome’s, though.

“By favor...do you mean the new Ministry branch?” Kagome said. “Because I assure you that that was his Majesty’s doing far more than it was mine. And besides, it was no favor, but rather something that was long overdue-”

A gentle laugh cut her short. Katsumi’s grin had deepened, though she had raised her fan up to obscure it.

“Pardon me, O-Miko-sama,” she said. “It is only that I thought you might say as much. We thought that you might say as much. It is why we thought it might be best to do this on our own, quietly.”

“Do what, Katsumi-sama?” Kagome pressed.

But Katsumi only shook her head, her fan now concealing entirely the lower half of her face.

“You need not worry, O-Miko-sama,” she said. “Only know that just as you have told us to dream of lives that we had not imagined before, we want the same thing for you.”

* * *

A couple of days later she received an unexpected summons to Inuyasha’s chambers. The men and women had decided to visit the records room at the Chūwain to do some research on how to best structure the new Ministry branch and they assured her that they could all get on just fine while she and the Tennō attended whatever matters that they needed to. 

Reluctantly Kagome agreed, a part of her having hoped to be able to aid them as they moved forward in the structuring of the new body. Ultimately, though, she supposed she would have to step back for the women and men to truly be able to take ownership of this. She might as well begin now.

When she arrived at Inuyasha’s chambers she was redirected by a servant there to the gardens out behind his residence. She followed the woman, figuring that the day was such a nice one that Inuyasha could not stand to be long inside. 

There was a pair of guards standing at the base of the small wooded hillock that the woman led her to. Kagome barely remembered to thank her as she bowed and departed, distracted by the familiarity of the place. It was the same small hill upon which she and Inuyasha had spent so much time practicing etiquette what now seemed a lifetime ago. From the base of the hill she could not see his figure, but she knew with a certainty that went beyond thought that he would be sitting in that same spot atop it waiting for her. 

She bowed to the guards as they allowed her to pass, making her way up the hill to find it exactly as she had imagined. A light spring breeze tempered the warmth of the day, catching and twisting through long silver strands that seemed almost the color of light itself as they moved. An ear twitched toward the sound of her approach and then he was on his feet, golden eyes bright as they met hers.

A smile stretched the length of Kagome’s face.

“Were you feeling nostalgic?” she teased lightly, gesturing towards the pond stretching out and away from their hillock.

Inuyasha’s eyes followed her motion distractedly before he shook his head.

“Keh,” he huffed, though the brightness of his expression did not dim even a fraction. “Shut up.”

In a blink he had bridged the short distance between them and taken her in his arms. In another his lips were against hers, warm and grinning. Instinctively Kagome’s hands fisted in the front of his haori, her eyes sliding closed as her mouth moved to meet his more firmly.

And then a chilling thought occurred to her. She tore her lips away with a gasp, pushing against his chest with both hands. He allowed her space, but his arms did not slacken around her.

“Inuyasha!” she hissed, flushing up to the tips of her ears. “The guards! We’re outside-!”

“Doesn’t matter,” he said, the words almost a laugh. “Doesn’t fucking matter. It worked, Kagome! They told me and it fucking worked!”

Kagome frowned, her eyes searching his face.

“You’re not making any sense,” she said, careful to keep her voice low lest she draw the attention of the guards. “What worked? Who told you what?”

His expression as she gazed up into it was radiant, triumphant. It was possibly the most handsome she had ever seen him look.

And then he spoke the words that made her feel as if she were suddenly tumbling upwards into an endless sky.

“They want you to be Empress.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today’s super mini-history lesson
> 
> -Katsumi: one of the ways that Katsumi can be written in kanji has the characters for “win/beauty” in it, thus her reference to what her parents named her 
> 
> -Ministry of the Imperial Household: A real facet of the structure of the imperial court during the Heian period, though I obviously took my own liberties with it. It was built and focused around the running and regulation of the imperial household (the Tennō, the Empress, his secondary wives, mistresses, and their children among other matters). It was also the only branch I could find any record of that had women among it, though they were confined exclusively to the tending of the women who the Tennō was involved with and served primarily to keep other men away from them. Again, I took a good deal of my own liberties with the idea.
> 
> -Chōseki: can translate to “tide”
> 
> -”a good man”: in Japanese the phrase is (roughly) “ii hito/ii otoko”, meaning a good man or a good person, but “ii otoko/ii hito” was also used at one point as a sort of short-hand or understated way of saying that the person was a potential boyfriend or lover without having to come out and just say it. This is the idea I was kind of playing around with in the scene between Hisana and Kagome, though it’s doubtful that the phrase had that same implication during the Heian period.
> 
> Thank you all for reading and I hope that you enjoyed it! Please shoot me a PM or a message on tumblr if you have any questions or anything! Also apologies for this chapter taking a bit to get done. It was a hectic holiday season and all of your support through it was greatly appreciated!
> 
> Also, if you happen to be looking for more ways to interact with or support me or this story, visit me on tumblr at @eien_no_basho ! Any and all support is always greatly appreciated!
> 
> Also also, it just so happens to be my birthday on the day of publishing this chapter, so consider it my reverse birthday gift to you all! 

**Author's Note:**

> Comment if you feel inclined and if not, I hope you enjoyed the read!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Greed-A Behind the Silk Screen One-Shot](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26623669) by [Eiennobasho](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eiennobasho/pseuds/Eiennobasho)




End file.
